


Barista's Choice

by JeffrinaMichelle



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-20
Updated: 2017-04-24
Packaged: 2018-05-22 00:49:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 219,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6064498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JeffrinaMichelle/pseuds/JeffrinaMichelle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke Griffin is a junior in college. She is majoring in art. She works two jobs to pay for her tuition. One morning while working at Grounder's Cafe, she meets a mysterious brunette. She is standoffish and orders the same drink every single day. As hard as Clarke tries, she can't shake away thoughts of the brunette.</p><p>Lexa Woods is in her last year of law school. She is hesitant to date after a serious heartbreak suffered from her girlfriend Costia. As soon as she meets the blonde Barista, she is intrigued.</p><p>Can Clarke help Lexa heal? Or will she continue to live by her mantra of "Love is weakness?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Hey guys! So I have just recently joined the 100 fandom. I am so obsessed over Clexa that it is disgusting. I thought that I would try out a fic for this fandom. 
> 
> I have three other stories right now. They are all in the Pitch Perfect fandom. Anybody who happens to read these, just know that I have not abandoned them. I am just really burnt out on BeChloe right now. So this is my way of taking a break.
> 
> I hope that you guys enjoy. I know that there isn't a lot of Clexa interaction in this chapter, but I was trying to set up a bit of backstory.
> 
> ***Currently undergoing rewrites***

**~*~Clarke POV~*~**

_“Ugh.”_ Clarke Griffin groans as the alarm on her cell phone blares through her otherwise quiet dorm room. She blindly seeks out her bedside table, pressing her hand down on the screen of her phone to snooze her alarm.

She doesn’t know why she agreed to pick up an extra shift at the café. Especially not an opening shift. Clarke was by no means a morning person. Getting up before the sun even gets up should be illegal.

Okay. So truth be told. Clarke needed to pick up this extra shift. Octavia wanted to take the day off so she could spend time with her boyfriend Lincoln. And Clarke was all too willing to pick up the extra eight hours this week.

Paying her way through college was definitely not cheap. Especially considering that her mother refused to help her with tuition. All because Clarke chose to major in art instead of following in her mother’s footsteps to study medicine.

It wasn’t that Clarke didn’t want to major in medicine. She loved the idea of becoming a doctor and she loved helping people.

The reason why Clarke chose art was for two reasons. Because her dad wanted her to and because she wanted to spite her mother.

Clarke blamed her mother Abby for her father’s death. Technically Abby was driving the car. Sure she wasn’t responsible for the drunk driver that smashed into the passenger side of the car.

Eleven year old Clarke didn’t quite understand why God chose to take her father away from her while the drunk driver only suffered a gash on his head.

Ten years later have left Clarke only slightly less bitter. She knows that Abby shouldn’t be blamed but her heart chooses otherwise. She still harbors ill feelings and a slight animosity towards her mother.

So seeing as Abby refuses to help Clarke with her tuition, she has been left to fend for herself for the last three years of schooling.

Working two jobs and going to school full time left Clarke unable to have anything resembling a social life. She spent her limited amount of free time with her dorm mate Raven. They never really did anything, usually lazing in bed watching something on Netflix. Raven made sure that Clarke went out for a jog with her every day, ensuring that both girls stayed in shape.

Clarke groans again as her alarms screams another warning at her. Glaring at the offending device, the blonde pulls her still asleep body out of her bed. She looks over at Raven’s bed, smirking as the other girl throws up a middle finger in her direction.

_“Do you have to have your alarm go off at three thirty in the fucking morning?”_

_“I have to get ready for work. I have to open the café this morning.”_

_“Well could you like warn me next time so I can jam q-tips in my fucking ears or something.”_

_“Sure Rae. I’ll be sure to warn you the next time.”_

_“Thanks bitch. Now go take a shower so I can go back to sleep.”_

Clarke laughs at her friend as Raven pulls her covers up over her head with a grunt. The blonde grabs her shower caddy and a towel, making her way out of the room into the communal showers. Clarke pulls her pajamas off, stepping to an empty shower. She showers quickly, washing the fatigue from her body. She has worked opening shifts for the past nine days, and all she really wants right now is a day off.

It doesn’t help that Clarke has dealt with the same morning rush for nine days.

She loves working at Grounder’s Café, she really does. Indra pays her well, and she is a good boss. A bit strict, but a good boss nonetheless.

She took a chance on Clarke three years ago when the blonde came into the café to beg for a job. She didn’t know anything about being a barista, but Indra gave her a chance anyway. Clarke and Octavia are pretty much Indra’s second in commands, managing the café when she is not there.

So it’s not the job that has Clarke down. It’s not the ridiculous amount of hours that she has put in at Grounder’s for the last nine days.

What has Clarke in a sour mood is the woman that has been frequenting the café lately.

The first day that Clarke saw her, she was pretty sure that her jaw hit the counter. The woman was gorgeous. She walked in wearing a pair of tight jogging pants and an equally tight tank top. Her hair was wound up in a tight bun on the top of her head. She has a light sheen of sweat glistening on her body, breathing slightly erratic. Almost like she just got done jogging.

Clarke had to admit, when the woman first walked in, she took her time checking out the other woman’s physique. The tight workout outfit didn’t leave much to the imagination, but it sure did cause the saliva in Clarke’s mouth to dry up.

As soon as the woman approached the counter, Clarke was pretty sure that she had died and gone to heaven. Clarke took a moment to appreciate the woman in front of her. She took in the woman’s full lips, her seemingly perfect eyebrows. What really make Clarke’s heartbeat quicken were the incredible hazel eyes that were staring back at her.

Clarke is broken out of her ogling when the woman across from her clears her irritably.

_“I’m sorry. Did you say something?”_

_“Yes. I said. Are you going to stand there all day, or are you going to do your job?”_

_“I…um…yes.”_

_“Yes you’re going to stand there all day? Or yes you’re going to do your job?”_

_“Welcome to Grounder’s Café. What can I get for you today?”_

_“I would like a large non-fat caramel macchiato. Two extra shots of espresso. No whip or froth. Heat the milk to one hundred and sixty five degrees.”_

_“Okay. Can I get a name for your order? Also…total is three fifty four.”_

_“The name is Lexa.”_

Clarke begins the drink while Lexa pulls a debit card out of her tank top. Clarke swipes the card at the register while the milk is steaming. She hands the card back to Lexa, grinding the beans to pull the espresso shots. Clarke pulls the shots, tossing them into the cup that she has labeled “Lexa” in her swirly scrawl. She mixes the caramel in with the espresso, pouring the perfectly steamed milk in last. Clarke tops the drink, looking up at the brunette with a wide grin. She hands the drink over to Lexa, fingers brushing lightly as the brunette takes the cup.

_“Here you go Lexa.”_

The brunette brings the drink to her lips, taking a healthy swallow. She hums noncommittedly as she turns away without another word.

Clarke watches the other woman walk away. She is not ashamed to admit that her eyes stay glued to the other woman’s hips and the way the jogging pants hug her ass as she walks away.

She is only slightly seething at the terse way that the brunette talked to her. To be fair, Clarke was drooling over her like an animal in heat, so she can’t really blame the slight attitude in the other woman’s voice.

The next seven days that Clarke works opening shifts play out pretty much the same way.

Clarke gets up way too early, showers and makes her way to the café. She opens the café at five a.m., working by herself until another barista shows up at eight.

Lexa comes in every morning that Clarke is there. She walks in wearing workout clothes at exactly six thirty in the morning. She orders the same drink, made exactly the same way. Some days she orders a plain bagel, some days she doesn’t.

Clarke is intrigued by the brunette woman. Most of the time she orders her drink and leaves without another word to the blonde.

On Clarke’s ninth day in a row, she is all but dead on her feet. She has only slept for three hours in the past two days. She was supposed to be off from the café today, seeing as she worked her other job bartending until almost two in the morning.

She has been by herself for the past hour and fifteen minutes and she has been insanely busy. She hasn’t even had a second to stop and catch her breath. Because apparently everybody and their mom needed caffeine this morning.

Clarke knows that Lexa should be in any minute to get her daily dose of caffeine. She pulls out a large cup, drizzling caramel into the bottom. At six thirty on the dot, Clarke looks up at the entrance as the tinkle of bells announces the door being opened.

Seeing Lexa walk into the café is like a breath of fresh air filling Clarke’s lungs. She can’t exactly place why, but she can’t shake the brunette from her mind.

The other woman hasn’t said more than ten different words to the blonde, but Clarke is infatuated with Lexa.

When Lexa makes her way to the counter, she grunts a greeting to the blonde. Before Lexa can open her mouth to place her order, Clarke places the piping hot beverage on the counter in front of the brunette.

Lexa’s eyes widen slightly before narrowing at the blonde.

_“What is this?”_

_“This is the same drink that you have ordered every single day that you have come in. A non-fat large caramel macchiato with two extra shots of espresso. No whip. Heated to one hundred and sixty five degrees exactly.”_

_“I didn’t order this.”_

Clarke scoffs lightly. _“Well not today. But you have ordered this drink for the past eight days.”_

_“Well I did not order it today. I would like a large dirty chai.”_

Clarke feels a small surge of anger at the brunette’s clipped tone. She bites her tongue, swallowing down her temper before replying.

_“Coming right up Lexa.”_

Clarke grabs another large cup off of a stack. The blonde pulls out a Tupperware container of chai powder. She dumps two heaping scoops of the powder into the cup. Pulling a gallon of milk out of the fridge, filling the frother pitcher. Placing the pitcher under the steam wand, Clarke turns the machine on. She then grinds espresso beans, pressing the grounds into the portafilter. Clarke pulls the shot, pouring the espresso into the cup. She turns off the steam wand, pouring the heated milk into the cup. Stirring the drink lightly, she places a lid on the hot beverage. Sliding the drink across the counter, Clarke musters up a halfhearted smile at the brunette.

_“Here you go Lexa. Sorry about the confusion.”_

_“It is quite alright Clarke. Have a good day.”_

_“I…”_ Clarke mouth drops open, trying to form a coherent sentence.  All of the words in her vocabulary have suddenly been forgotten as her mind replays the sound of her name coming out of the brunette’s mouth. In the entirety of the past week and a half, Lexa has yet to say more than ten words to the blonde. Let alone acknowledge the fact that she knows Clarke’s name. Hearing the way her name rolls off of the brunette’s tongue is enough to make Clarke dizzy. Biting her lip to stifle the groan that is threatening to spill out, her lips curl into what she hopes is a smile. It probably comes out as a half grimace considering that she is still biting her lip. Releasing her bottom lip with a pop, Clark tries a second attempt at a smile.

_“You too Lexa. See you next time.”_

_“Indeed you will Clarke.”_

Lexa takes her cup off of the counter, tipping the drink towards her mouth. She pulls a few dollar bills out of her tank top, dropping them in the tip jar. Turning away without another word, she makes her way out of the café.

Clarke watches the brunette leave, eyes drinking in the other girl’s tight curves. Her mouth goes dry as her eyes stay glued to the sway of the brunette’s hips.

Her perving is cut short when her cell phone chimes. Clarke pulls the device out of her apron, swiping the screen to unlock it.

**O-Face: (06:45 a.m.) _Thank you for taking my shift today Clarkey Poo. I owe you one._**

**Griffers: (06:45 a.m.) _You’re welcome O. I have a question for you actually._**

**O-Face: (06:45 a.m.) _Shoot._**

**Griffers: (06:46 a.m.) _Well first off, why are you up so early?_**

**O-Face: (06:46 a.m.) _Well, is it really considered early if you haven’t been to bed yet?_**

**Griffers: (06:47 a.m.) _Gross. I don’t need to hear anything else._**

**O-Face: (06:47 a.m.) _Whatevs. Anyway, what is your question?_**

**Griffers: (06:47 a.m.) _Well since you work openings most of the time. I was wondering about one of our regulars._**

**O-Face: (06:48 a.m.) _Okay…._**

**Griffers: (06:48 a.m.) _There is a brunette that has been coming in lately. Her name is Lexa._**

**O-Face: (06:48 a.m.) _What about her?_**

**Griffers: (06:49 a.m.) _Do you know anything about her?_**

**O-Face: (06:49 a.m.) _Not really. I mean she comes in every morning at the same exact time. She usually orders a non-fat caramel macchiato with no whip. Heated to 165 exactly. Don’t try and have it ready for her when she walks in. Otherwise she will order something else just to piss you off._**

**Griffers: (06:51 a.m.) _Yeah. I kind of made that mistake today._**

**O-Face: (06:51 a.m.) _Sorry. I should have warned you about that. Other than her ability to be punctual and the fact that she is always in super tight workout clothes, I don’t know anything. She never talks to me unless she is ordering her drink. Sometimes she talks to Indra when she is in the café._**

**Griffers: (06:52 a.m.) _Well she is like crazy hot._**

**O-Face: (06:52 a.m.) _Don’t even try and go there. She will not give you the time of day._**

**Griffers: (06:53 a.m.) _That is just rude Octavia._**

**O-Face: (06:53 a.m.) _Oh no..shit. Clarke. I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant that she is really closed off. I have seen many people try and hit on her. Raven was in the café one day and she tried. But Lexa just totally ignored her and left when I was done with her drink. And we both know that Rae is charming as fuck and can make a straight girl swoon._**

**Griffers: (06:54 a.m.) _Well SHIT._**

**O-Face: (06:54 a.m.) _Sorry Clarke._**

**Griffers: (06:55 a.m.) _Not your fault. It’s not like I have time to date right now anyway._**

Clarke’s attention snaps up as a throat is cleared in front of her. Her blue eyes widen as she meets the narrowed glare of her boss. Indra is standing in front of the counter, hands on her hips.

_“Do I pay you to stand at the counter and text on your phone Clarke?”_

_“No Indra. I’m sorry. I just had to ask Octavia a question.”_

_“I’m sure that the question was of the utmost importance for you to ask it while on the clock.”_

_“Yes ma’am.”_

_“Get back to work Clarke.”_

_“Sorry Indra.”_

_“It’s fine.”_

Clarke turns away from Indra, grabbing her towel. She hums lightly to herself as she begins wiping the counters down from her morning rush.

The rest of her shift passes by without any excitement. By the time two o’clock comes around, Clarke is all but dead on her feet. She doesn’t remember how she got home, but she doesn’t even make it out of her work clothes before she passes out.

 

**~*~Lexa POV~*~**

_“Anya, I’m home.”_ Lexa calls into the quiet apartment. She closes the door, dropping her keys in the bowl next to the door. She drains the rest of her chai tea, glancing at the writing of her name on the cup. The blonde’s neat, loopy scrawl sends flutters through Lexa’s stomach.

She internally shakes off the unwanted feelings. Tossing the empty cup into the nearest waste bin, Lexa makes her way towards the bathroom.  Turning the water on, Lexa makes her way towards a shut bedroom door. She takes a deep breath before turning the knob.

Anya is splayed out across her bed, snoring lightly. The blankets on her bed are haphazardly hanging off the edge of the bed. Lexa smirks softly, making her way over to the bed.

 _“Anya. It is time to get up. We have class in an hour.”_ Lexa softly shakes the other girl’s shoulder.

 _“Shof op.”_ Comes the brunette’s muffled reply.

_“Get out of bed Anya. I don’t want to have to force you.”_

_“No.”_

_“Okay. Well just remember that I gave you a chance."_

Lexa grabs the brunette’s legs, pulling her quickly to the floor. Anya lands with a grunt of pain.

_“Fuck you.”_

_“You’re not my type.”_

Lexa laughs as Anya’s middle finger is raised in her direction. She makes her way out of the room.

_“Get up or I am leaving without you.”_

_“Fine.”_

Lexa crosses the hallway back into the bathroom. She peels off her slightly sweaty workout clothes. She steps into the shower, groaning as the hot water rolls over her sore muscles.

She washes quickly, scrubbing the grime of her morning run off of her body. As she washes her hair, her thoughts drift towards the blonde from the café.

 _“Clarke.”_ The blonde’s name tastes sweet as it rolls off of her lips.

Lexa’s thoughts linger on the other girl’s bright blue eyes. The swells of her breasts, the curves of her hips.

 _“Stop.”_ Lexa chastises her rampant thoughts. _“You cannot feel this. This is weakness.”_

The way the blonde’s face lights up when Lexa walks in at six thirty every morning. The way Lexa’s name sounds coming from her plump lips.

Lexa groans, slamming her fist lightly against the shower wall. She rushes through the rest of her showering routine, trying to shake thoughts of the blonde away.

Turning the shower off more harshly than necessary, Lexa steps out of the shower. She quickly towels off, wrapping the plush fabric around her body.

She quickly makes her way to her bedroom. She grabs the clothes off of her bed that she set out this morning before her run. Lexa quickly pulls on her chosen outfit, running her fingers through her wet hair.

While Lexa pulls her wet hair into braids, Anya makes her way into the bedroom, rubbing sleepily at her eyes. She plops her body down on the bed.

 _“Good morning Heda.”_ Anya calls out against a loud yawn.

_“That’s not a word Anya. That is a made up word from a novel.”_

_“I don’t care Heda. How did you sleep?”_

_“I slept well.”_

_“Did you go for a run today?”_

_“Of course I did Anya.”_

_“I know. You never miss a run.”_

_“I like to keep in shape.”_

Anya scoffs. _“Please. You have like zero percent body fat. You don’t need to run.”_

_“I enjoy running.”_

_“I know. Did you go to Grounder’s?”_

_“You know that I did.”_

_“Did you see your blonde girlfriend?”_

_“I am sure that I don’t know what you are talking about.”_

_“Yeah, I thought that you would say that. You know the girl that you keep talking about when you come home from the café. Saying things like.”_ Anya laughs. _“Clarke makes the best caramel macchiato that I have ever had. Clarke has that best smile. Clarke is so hot. Blah blah blah.”_

_Lexa’s eyes widen as she turns to look at her friend._

_“I never said that she was hot.”_

_“Um, you did actually.”_

_“I don’t remember that happening.”_

_“It was the second day that you saw her.”_

_“Um…”_

_“It’s fine Lexa. You are allowed to be attracted to someone. You haven’t even looked at another girl since Cos…”_

Lexa holds her hand up in front of her. _“Don’t say her name.”_

_“Look, Lex. It’s okay to put yourself out there again. It’s been three years. You’re twenty three years old. You should be going out and hooking up with hot girls. Go out and live. You shouldn’t be cooped up in the house. Getting up at four in the morning to go jogging. Going to a café just so you can make heart eyes at a certain blonde barista. Come home, take a shower. Go to class. Get out of class. Go to work. Come home. Eat dinner. Do homework until you go to bed at nine at night. You’re barely living Lex.”_

Lexa’s eyes drop to the floor, a flood of emotion hitting her as she is assaulted by thoughts of her ex-girlfriend.

_“You weren’t like this before everything happened with Costia. I know that she broke your heart Lex, but you can’t close up like this forever.”_

_“Love is weakness Anya. I will not be fooled again.”_

_“That isn’t a way to live Lexa. You need to try again. What if this girl is the one? And you don’t give her a shot because you are scared? Because of Costia? Because she broke your heart? She wasn’t worth it.”_

_“It does not matter Anya. I am content with my life as it is.”_

_“I’m sure that you are.”_

Anya gets off the bed, walking over to her best friend. She places a reassuring hand on Lexa’s shoulder, squeezing lightly.

_“Just think about it Lexa. The way that you talk about this girl, you are obviously smitten. Do you really want to miss out on an opportunity that could end up being something great?”_

_I don’t know Anya. I am not ready to try again. I thought that Costia was it for me. Look how that turned out.”_

_“You’ll never know if you aren’t willing to try.”_

_“You’re right. I am not sure.”_

_“Look…I’m just saying. Think about it. You obviously find her attractive. Just talk to her a little bit more when you are at the café. Maybe sit down and enjoy your drink, instead of just running out as soon as it is ready.”_

_“I will consider this.”_

_“Mochof Heda.”_

Lexa smiles lightly, smacking Anya in the arm that is placed on her shoulder.

_“Dammit Anya. What did I tell you about that made up language?”_

_“I like it.”_

_“Of course you do..”_

_“Anywho. We should probably leave before we are late for class.”_

Lexa glances over at her alarm clock, eyes widening as she realizes the time. She grabs her best friend’s hand, pulling the girl out of the room. Blonde hair and blue eyes continually running through her troubled mind.

**TBC**

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Lexa backstory to get us rolling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Here it is lovelies, my newest update. I hope that you enjoy. It is a little bit angstier than I had planned, but this is a fluffy story, I promise. I hope that you enjoy!!!

**_~~~Barista’s Choice~~~_ **

**_\---Chapter 1---_ **

**_~*~Eight Years Ago~*~_ **

Lexa Woods is a creature of habit. She does not stray from her comfort zones, ever.

She has always been more comfortable having everything planned out. She wasn’t always as strict with her routine. Not when she was with Costia.

Lexa didn’t believe in soulmates. She was always more scientific in with her thoughts on love and relationships. She believed in lust at first sight. After an initial meeting with somebody that you were sexually attracted to, you would date them. Dating them would test to see if you were emotionally compatible with each other. Physical/Sexual attraction plus emotional attraction would eventually blossom into love. At least that is what made sense in Lexa’s mind.

Anya always made fun of Lexa when it came to her logic on such simple life experiences. Lexa would stress herself out trying to analyze everything until she was sure that her head was going to explode.

When Lexa met Costia, it was as if every single theory that Lexa had involving love was null and void.

Costia broke through all of Lexa’s walls like a wrecking ball. The brunette fell for Costia, hard and fast.

They were young, sure. But in Lexa’s mind, that didn’t make the love any less real.

Costia moved to Trikru High School in Portland, Oregon in the middle of Lexa’s sophomore year. Anya, being a year older was in her junior year.

Lexa took to Costia quickly. They always said that opposites attract. Costia was everything that Lexa wasn’t. She was outgoing where Lexa was more reserved. She was open and loving and just everything that Lexa was afraid to be.

So when Lexa first started hanging out with Costia, she knew that this girl was going to be her first love. For the first time in her life, Lexa wasn’t analyzing her thoughts. She was content in letting her relationship with Costia blossom without a carefully constructed plan.

Losing that control was not easy for Lexa. She knew that she was a type “A” personality but, having a plan always made her feel better.

Lexa was taken by complete surprise when she finally came to the conclusion that she had feelings for Costia. She had never actually been attracted to anyone in her fifteen years of life. No guy or girl seemed to catch her attention.

She had taken to researching on the internet about her lack of lust or attraction to another person. The term was called Asexuality or no sexuality.

Anya chalked it up to Lexa being extremely focused on school. Lexa was adamant that it was unlikely for her to ever feel sexual attraction to another person.

So figuring out that she was attracted to Costia was the most freeing experience that Lexa had ever felt.

Telling her mother on the other hand was the most panic-inducing choice that had ever been placed in Lexa’s hands. Here was a girl, who was completely terrified of making a decision without knowing the outcome, discovering that she did not fall into the spectrum of what society deemed “normal.”

Anya was positive that this reveal was going to go as smoothly as possible. She was always the more positive friend in the relationship. The two girls had known each other since they were in diapers; their mother’s being best friends.

Over the years, the two girls became closer than friends. They were almost like twins. Finishing each other’s sentences and bickering like siblings.

They also developed their own language based off of a book that they had read during middle school. The two girls would often converse in what they called “Trigedasleng,” when they didn’t want other people to hear their conversations.

Despite having the utmost trust and faith in her best friend, telling Anya hadn’t been any easier for Lexa. She was sure that her best was going to freak out and stop talking to her.

Not that Anya had ever mentioned that she was uncomfortable around or in any way against gay people. Lexa just had a tendency to think that the worst possible outcome was also the most likely.

 _“It’s not as if you are hiding deep in the closet anyway Lex.”_ Were her exact words to the brunette.

Lexa had only cried a little bit in relief. Not that she would ever admit to that.

Lexa surmises that her father abandoning her had a lot to do with her pessimistic attitude. She blames him for a lot of different things in her life.

Not that Lexa really remembers her father. He left when she was only four years old after all.

The day that Lexa actually decided to come out to her mother was the most terrifying day of her life. She spent the better part of her day pacing in her room. Anya was sure that Lexa was going to wear the carpet down if she continued on.

_“Leksa, chil au. Nou worry.” **(Lexa, calm down. Don’t worry.)**_

_“Onya, shof op.” **(Anya, shut up)**_

_“Pacing around the floor isn’t going to help matters, Heda. Let’s just go get this over with so you can stop with the panicking.”_

_“Kei.” **(Okay)**_

Lexa’s feet stop their incessant pacing, terror filled green eyes meeting her best friend’s gaze.

_“I don’t think that I can do this Onya.”_

_“I promise that you will be fine Heda. Even if this goes horribly wrong, you will always have me. Ai hod yu in sis.” **(I love you sister.)**_

Anya closes the minute amount of space separating her from her best friend. She wraps her arms around the brunette’s waist, enveloping her in a tight embrace. Lexa’s body stiffens in surprise before relaxing into the hug.

_“Ai hod yu in seintaim sis.” **(I love you too sister.)**_

_“Alright Heda, enough of this mushy shit. No more procrastinating.”_

_Lexa laughs. “Fine Onya. Let go of me.”_

Anya reluctantly releases Lexa from the hug. The two girls make their way downstairs, arm in arm. Lexa’s mom, Liliana is sitting in an armchair, legs tucked under her body. Her nose is buried in what looks like a large textbook. Her concentration on said book is broken by the clearing of a throat. Her spectacled gaze lifts up to meet her daughter’s. Lexa is standing nervously in front of her, posture slumped in defeat. Lily smiles warmly at Lexa, setting the book down on the end table.

_“What’s up buttercup?”_

_“Mother. I have something that I need to tell you”_

_“Lexa. You look like you are about to have a heart attack. Sit down.”_

_“I’m fine here Mother.”_

_“Suit yourself.”_ Lily untucks her legs from underneath her, sitting up straight in the chair. She lifts her glasses off of her eyes, settling them on top of her head. _“So, what’s on your mind?”_

_“Um. I am not entirely sure how to approach this subject. Anya has told me that it is better to just get it over with, rip off the Band-Aid if you will.”_

_“Okay. So rip off that Band-Aid, sweetheart.”_

_“Okay.”_ Lexa’s hands begin fidgeting nervously _. “So. I have pretty much grown up thinking that I was devoid of any sort of physical attraction to another person. Recently I have discovered that initial thought to be untrue.”_

 _“Heda. I know that you are nervous. Stop talking to your mom like you a cross examining her. She may be a lawyer, but this doesn’t have to be so devoid of emotion. Just like we practiced.”_ Anya calls from the kitchen, the sound of cabinets opening carrying into the living room.

 _“Onya. Chil daun.”_ Lexa clears her throat, eyes dropping to stare at the floor. _“Mother. I have recently discovered that I am in fact capable of physical attraction to another person.” **(Anya. Stand down.)**_

_“Oh? Is that so? Who is the lucky guy?”_

_“Well, you see. That is the thing. The lucky person is in fact not a male.”_

_“So?”_

_“I am gay Mother.”_ Lexa’s eyes close, her mind trying to prepare her for the onslaught of yelling.

 _“Oh baby.”_ Lily stands up from her chair. She pulls her daughter into a tight embrace. Lexa relaxes in her mother’s arms, tears welling in her eyes. She presses her face against her mother’s neck, breathing in the familiar scent that reminds her of home. _“I don’t care who you love. You will always be my little girl.”_

_“Thank you mother.”_

_“No baby. Thank you for being the amazing young woman that I raised you to be.”_

_“Mom..”_ Lexa’s choked reply is cut off by Anya’s voice.

_“Well? Is it done? Are you disowned? Nomon gon frag op Heda?” **(Mother going to kill the Commander?”**_

_“Shof op Onya.”_ Lexa’s watery response is muffled against her mother’s neck. _“Fou Heda frag op Onya.” **(Shut up Anya.) (Before the Commander kills Anya.)**_

 _“Nou sen in, Leksa.”_ Anya walks out of the kitchen, holding two sandwiches and a can of mountain dew. _“Heda.” **(Not listening, Lexa.)**_

Lexa pulls away from her mother’s embrace, discreetly wiping her eyes. She looks over at her best friend, smiling at the older girl.

_“We didn’t have any cake, so I made you a “welcome to the gay club” pb and j sandwich. I call it the peanut butter and gay sammie.”_

_“Oh my god Anya. Sometimes, I don’t know why I am friends with you.”_

_“Because you love me.”_

_“Yeah. I do. Now give me that sandwich.”_

_“Foshou, Heda.” **(For sure, Commander.)** _

Lexa grabs the sandwich from her best friend, taking a huge bite of the peanut butter goodness.

_“Mochof, Onya.” **(Thank you, Anya.)**_

_“Pro, Leksa.” **(You’re welcome, Lexa.)**_

_“Okay girls. I love you both very much, but I need to study for this case that I have next week. So, go find something to do. If you don’t distract me for the rest of the day, I’ll take you guys out to dinner tonight.”_

_“YAASSS!!!! Gon we nau, Heda.”_ Anya practically yells, words jumbled by the sticky peanut butter inside of her mouth. She grabs Lexa’s hand, pulling her best friend out of the house. **_(Going now, Commander.)_**

**_~*~*~*~*~*_ **

The rest of Lexa’s sophomore year passed by in a blur. She stayed busy with her studies, as well as looking at potential colleges to attend for law school. The small amount of free time that she managed to scrounge up was split between hanging out with Anya and her quickly developing relationship with Costia.

Their relationship was far from perfect. Lexa was somewhat emotionally stunted when it came to certain aspects of their relationship. It led to more petty arguments than Lexa would care to admit.

Costia couldn’t stand fighting with Lexa, so she had a tendency to apologize first. Even if Lexa was in the wrong in the argument. She would always admit defeat before Lexa would.

Regardless of the petty arguments between the two girls, their relationship was full of love. They were incredibly passionate and loving towards the other.

By the time the two girls were eighteen, Lexa was completely sure that she wanted to marry Costia. They hadn’t realy talked explicitly about it, but Lexa knew that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with the other girl.

They were off to different colleges, but Lexa was confident that their relationship could withstand the distance.

It was hard, being three thousand miles away from the person that you love, but they made it work. They would text each other every single day, and they would skype before they went to bed.

They took turns visiting during breaks and holidays, spending as much time as they possibly could together.

It was kind of a double edged sword for Lexa. She was ecstatic being able to see Costia, but spending time with the other girl made the time apart even harder. The first two years of college were excruciatingly painful for the brunette.

The last couple of breaks had been slightly weird. Costia was definitely acting differently when she was around Lexa. Over winter break, Costia flew to California. All Costia wanted to two over the two weeks that she was visiting was party. She wanted to go to bars and was adamant about going to every single party that was thrown on campus.

Lexa had never been big about ingesting alcohol. She didn’t really see the appeal of losing control over her inhibitions. She would occasionally partake in one drink while out, but that was a rare occasion.

Costia spent the majority of her vacation being completely wasted. When Lexa confronted her about it, Costia told her that she was just really stressed with school and that she wanted to unwind. Lexa understood the stress that Costia was under, so she just put on her best fake smile and allowed her girlfriend the freedom to unwind in the only way that she knew how.

For spring break, Lexa was supposed to fly to Connecticut to spend time with Costia. Two days before her scheduled flight, Costia called her early in the morning. She told Lexa that they had to cancel their plans for break. She was swamped with class work and with her internship with a local architectural company.

Lexa was upset about not being able to see her girlfriend, but she understood how busy the other was. Instead, she flew home to Oregon with Anya and they spent time with their mothers.

Summer break brought Costia back to California. They spent an entire month hanging out together on the beach. Costia was back to her normal self. She didn’t drink one time the entire month that she was there. Lexa’s worries were easily forgotten as Costia showered Lexa with nothing but love and affection.

The next few months were crazy busy for Lexa. She had no free time between classes and case studies. Spring break rolled around before she even had a chance to breathe.

This visit was going to be different. Lexa was finally ready to bite the bullet and ask Costia to marry her. She had planned out the perfect date. Lexa had kicked Anya out of the apartment for the night. She had made Costia’s favorite meal. Candles were strategically placed to set up the ambiance. Costia had just texted Lexa to let her know that she had picked up her rental car and that she was on her way. Assuming that traffic cooperated, she would arrive at Lexa and Anya’s apartment in fifteen minutes. Lexa put the finishing touches on their food, setting the table quickly. She made her way to the bedroom, pulling on the dress that she had picked out for the evening. Braiding her hair into intricate braids across her head, Lexa rushes back into the living room just as the front door opens. Costia stumbles through the front door, dragging her luggage though the door. She drops the bags in front of the door before launching her body into her girlfriend’s.

After ten minutes of getting properly reunited with her girlfriend, Lexa reluctantly breaks away from the other girl. She leads Costia over to the candlelit table. The two enjoy catching up over their amazing meal.

Lexa can feel the butterflies settling throughout her stomach as she thinks about what is to come. She is fairly certain that Costia is going to say yes, but she is still understandable nervous.

Costia excuses herself to the restroom after finishing her meal. Lexa smiles brightly as Costia thanks her for a wonderful dinner. As soon as the other girl is out of sight, Lexa begins her plan. She quickly clears off the table, throwing dirty dishes into the sink to wait until the morning. She grabs the small velvet box out of the drawer that she stashed it in that afternoon. She makes her way into the living room with dessert just as Costia makes her way out of the restroom.

 _“Costia.”_ Lexa begins, patting the couch cushion next to her. _“I am so happy that you are here.”_

 _“I’m happy to be here too babe.”_ Costia sits down on the couch beside her girlfriend.

_“So. We have been together for five years now. And I love you more than I ever thought possible.”_

_“Oh my god, no. Are you breaking up with me? I know that things have been hard lately, but I love you so much Lexa.”_

_“Oh god no, Cos.”_ Lexa places her free hand on her girlfriend’s knee, rubbing the bare skin softly. _“I’m not breaking up with you.”_

 _“Jesus Lexa! You almost gave me a heart attack.”_ Costia smacks the other girl’s shoulder playfully.

_“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. Quite the opposite actually.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

Lexa takes her hand off of Costia’s knee. She moves swiftly off of the couch, kneeling down in front of the other girl. Costia’s eyes widen as Lexa’s intent becomes clear.

 _“Costia.”_ Lexa begins. _“When I first met you, I knew that you were different. I never realized that I could have such intense feelings towards another person before you came into my life. You helped me realize that I was able to want another, that I was able to be attracted to someone else. I love you so much. I know that these past two years have been difficult because we are so far away from each other. But we have been strong and we made it through. I know that I still have about four years until I finish school. But I don’t want to wait anymore. I want to spend the rest of my life making you as happy as you have made me. So Costia, will you marry me?”_

Lexa pulls the velvet box out from behind her back, revealing a simple white gold band with a princess cut diamond set in the middle. She holds the ring out towards her girlfriend with a hopeful smile on her face.

Costia’s face breaks out in a pained smile. She places her free hand lovingly against Lexa’s cheek.

 _“Oh Lexa, baby.”_ Tears begin falling down Costia’s face. _“No.”_

 _“What? Why?”_ Lexa pulls back slightly, her smile falling into a frown.

_“I want to spend the rest of my life with you too baby. It’s just not the right time to get engaged. You have four years left before you are done with school. I have two years left and my internship to worry about. We barely get to see each other as it is. As soon as you graduate, we can talk about this again.”_

_“I…….why does it matter? I love you. We can wait until after I graduate to get married.”_

_“I know that you love me baby. I love you too. But will you still feel the same way in four years? What if you find somebody else to love?”_

_“I won’t.”_ Lexa is no longer able to hold back her tears; they fall silently down her cheeks. _“You’re the only person that I will ever want.”_

_“You can’t predict what will happen in the next four years. You could fall in love with somebody else tomorrow.”_

_“No. That will never happen.”_

_“You don’t know what the future holds, Lexa.”_

_“Maybe not. But I know what my heart wants. My heart wants you and only you.”_

_“My heart wants you too. But Lexa, we are both so young. We’ve been together since we were fifteen. So how do you know that you will still want to marry me when you finish law school?”_

_“Is there a reason why you are saying all of this? Have you been seeing somebody else?”_

_“Not so much seeing somebody else.”_

_Lexa scoffs. “What does that mean, Costia?”_

Costia sighs, running her free hand over her face. _“There have been a few drunken nights with a girl back at school.”_

Lexa’s face drops completely. She pulls her hand away from Costia’s, trying to put some distance between them.

_“You’ve cheated on me?”_

_“I love you Lexa. It only happened twice. I just missed you so much and I was drunk.”_

_“I missed you too, but I didn’t go out and fuck somebody else to make me feel better.”_

_“You’re overacting right now.”_

_“Am I?”_ Lexa gets to her feet, anger finally bubbling over. _“You just told me that you have been screwing somebody else behind my back, and I am overacting because I am upset?”_ The brunette begins pacing angrily in front of the couch, fingers pinched over the bridge of her nose in irritation.

 _“You know what Lexa?”_ Costia gets to her feet, moving away from the couch. _“I can’t be here while you are this upset. So I’m just going to go.”_

 _“What!?”_ Lexa stops her pacing to turn to her girlfriend, eyes widened in shock. _“You’re leaving?”_

_“Yeah. I mean, I’ll come back when you calm down. I just can’t be in this house while you are so upset.”_

_“But you just got here.”_

_“I know baby. I’ll come back. Probably in the morning.”_

_“Costia.”_ Lexa pleads, voice choking up with unshed tears. _“Please don’t leave.”_

 _“I have to. I’m…sorr..”_ Costia turns her back on Lexa, leaving the apartment without a second glance.

The resounding slam of the front door closing is the last thing that Lexa hears before her sobs drown out everything else.

**_~*~*~*~*~*_ **

Lexa isn’t sure how long she has been asleep, curled into the fetal position on the living room floor. The last thing that she remembers is lying down next to the couch, blinded by the overwhelming amount of hot tears filling her eyes. She is sure of two things.

-She is sure that she is dehydrated from the amount of tears that she has shed since Costia left the apartment.

-She is sure that she is an idiot for deciding to lie down on the floor. She has never been as uncomfortable as she is right now.

Curious as to why she has suddenly woken up, Lexa glances around the living room. The apartment is still completely silent, save for Lexa’s stuttered breaths. The brunette is startled out of her post slumber haze as her phone notification pings loudly throughout the house. Scrambling to her feet, Lexa grabs her cell phone off of the living room table. The lock screen lights up with ten missed calls and ten unread text messages.

Unlocking her phone, Lexa opens her missed call log. She has three missed calls from Anya. Two missed calls from her mom. One missed call from a number that she doesn’t recognize. The other five calls are from Clara, Costia’s mother.

Lexa opens up the text messages before listening to the voicemail that has been left.

**_Onya Kom Trikru: (09:30 p.m.)_ ** _Please don’t have sex on the couch. Or anywhere that isn’t your bed._

**_Onya Kom Trikru: (09:35 p.m.)_ ** _So did she say yes? Spechou Heda? **(Congratulations Commander?)**_

**_Onya Kom Trikru: (09:55 p.m.)_ ** _Answer me joka. Leska Kom Trikru joken Kostia Kom Trikru **? (Answer me fucker.) (Lexa of Tree People fucking Costia of Tree People?)**_

**_Onya Kom Trikru: (10:30 p.m.)_ ** _Branwada!!!! **(Fool!!!!)**_

**_Clara: (10:35 p.m.)_ ** _Lexa, have you heard from Costia? She didn’t call me when she landed and I can’t get ahold of her now._

**_Clara: (10:40 p.m.)_ ** _Please call me as soon as you get this. I am getting really worried._

**_Clara: (11:15 p.m.)_ ** _Lexa please. I am really starting to freak out here. Her plane landed at 8. She promised that she would call as soon as she got in._

**_Clara: (11:30 p.m.)_ ** _I am going to assume that you two have fallen asleep. Please, please, please have her call me as soon as you guys get up._

**_< 3 Costia: (11:35 p.m.) _ ** _Lexxxxxaaaaa!!! Bb. Isory tht I lft uuuuu. I luv u Lxa._

**_< 3 Costia: (11:45 p.m.) _ ** _Cominggggg hme. C U Sooooooonnnnawweedd Bb._

Lexa closes out the messaging app. Glancing at the time on her phone, Lexa’s worry increases slightly when she sees that it is almost one thirty in the morning. Costia should’ve been back over an hour ago. Finally the brunette opens up the voicemail. The message is from Clara and it was received only thirty minutes ago.

 _“Lexa.”_ Lexa can barely make out Clara’s words due to heavy sobbing in the other woman’s voice. _“I was really hoping that the phone ringing would’ve woken you up. Um…I just got a phone call from the Santa Clara Police Department. They probably tried to call you too. Um…Costia got into a car accident_.” Clara’s words cut off as loud sobs erupt from the other woman. _“They said that she was drunk. She got behind the wheel of her rental car. At some point while she was driving, she lost control of the car. It careened off of the freeway and stopped on the other side. There was a semi that couldn’t stop in time. It hit her car.”_ Another loud sob breaks through the phone. _“She died on impact.”_

The last thing that Lexa hears before she passes out is Clara sobs coming through her speaker.

**_~*~*~*~*~*_ **

**_~*~Present Day~*~_ **

_“NO!!! COSTIA!!!”_

Lexa startles awake from the nightmare that she was trapped in, completely drenched in a cold sweat. She relives the same night every time she goes to sleep.

Reliving the worst day of your entire life over and over again is exhausting. The only time that Lexa doesn’t dream of Costia’s death is when she tires herself out to the point of exhaustion. Discovering that she didn’t have nightmares when she was exhausted is what led Lexa to her slight addiction to jogging.

She started off running on the treadmill at the gym on campus between classes. For a while, she stopped having dreams, instead sleeping soundly through the night.

The relief was short lived, however. It took less than two months for the nightmares to come back. Rendering Lexa completely helpless as Costia died again and again.

Sometimes she relived the nightmare as she had lived it, stuck in her apartment.

When her mind was feeling particularly cruel, she would relive the accident through Costia’s eyes.

Lexa knew that she wasn’t to blame for the accident. Costia was drunk; she made the decision to drive while intoxicated. Lexa had a feeling that Costia did her fair share of drinking back at school, but she never realized how big of a problem the other girl had.

She can’t help but think that things would’ve been different if she had never tried to propose that night. She knows that she isn’t thinking rationally, because Costia is the one that was in the wrong. She is the one that turned down Lexa’s proposal and admitted to cheating. She is the one that decided that she was okay to drive after ingesting an obscene amount of alcohol.

Lexa can’t help but feel responsible; regardless of what her head tells her is true. Throwing the blankets back with a grunt, the brunette slides out of her bed.

Tossing on the running shorts and top that she set out last night, Lexa grabs her keys and phone before making her way out of the apartment.

Her hamstrings are still tight from yesterday’s run; she probably should’ve stretched before taking off.

**-Run through the pain, run through the pain.**

Her inner mantra matches the pace of her footfalls.

**-Hodnes laik kwelnes. Hodnes laik kwelnes. (Love is weakness. Love is weakness.)**

Two miles into the run have Lexa’s mind mostly clear from the nightmare. Her mood is still sour from the onslaught of emotion. She pushes forward, willing her emotions to die down in intensity.

Four miles in have the brunette panting with exertion, a shiny sheen of sweat adorning her lean body. She changes her route to head towards Grounder’s Café, caffeine being next on her list.

Her mind still slightly foggy from the nightmare leaves her slightly in a daze, muscle memory leading her towards the café. Not having complete focus on her surroundings has Lexa running head first into another moving body.

 _“OW!!! FUCK!!!”_ Rings out as Lexa falls backwards onto the sidewalk. Her hand flies up to her forehead to try and rub the pain away from head-butting another person. She opens her eyes, blinking back the rapidly forming headache. She meets the pissed off glare of another brunette splayed out in front of her.

 _“What the hell?”_ The other woman sneers. _“Can you pay attention to where the fuck you are going?”_

_“It takes two people to run into each other. Maybe you should be more aware of your surroundings.”_

_“Oh fuck off Robo Barbie, you are the one who ran into a cripple.”_

_“Excuse me?”_

_“Did I stutter?”_

_“Raven. Calm down. It was an accident.”_

_“Stay out of this Clarke.”_

Green eyes shoot up at the mention of the name. Meeting the amused gaze of the blonde that has been overtaking the brunette’s thoughts. The blue of Clarke’s eyes seem brighter out in the morning light, causing an involuntary smile to break out across the brunette’s face. The smile is short lived however, as Clarke’s Rottweiler barks out again.

 _“Jesus Christ. My leg is broken forever_.” Raven barks out, hands rubbing her braced left leg.

_“Oh my god Raven, don’t be so dramatic. You’re going to be fine.”_

_“You’re not the one who got slammed into, Princess.”_

_“No. But I did get up at the butt crack of dawn to run with you. I could’ve slept in until I had to get ready for class. So quit being such a baby and get your ass up.”_

_“God I hate you.”_

_“No you don’t. You love me.”_

_“Not.”_

Clarke holds her hand out to Raven, who begrudgingly grabs it. Clarke lifts Raven to her feet with a slight grunt. Raven brushes dust off of her workout clothes.

Clarke turns her attention to the still splayed out brunette. Lexa’s expression is impassive as she drinks in the slightly sweating state of the blonde. Her ample chest is heaving slightly as she catches her breath. Her top is clinging tightly to her skin, not leaving much to Lexa’s imagination. The tight leggings aren’t much better. Lexa feels her face heat up in a blush as she pervs on the blonde. Her inappropriate ogling is broken when the woman in front of her lets out a small giggle.

_“You alright there, Lex?”_

Lexa feels a sharp pang in her chest at the blonde’s amused stare. She feels embarrassed, a little bit turned on, but mostly terrified. Nobody has made her feel anything like this since Costia. If anything, her feelings towards Clarke are more intense. That thought alone has the brunette’s walls struggling to reinforce themselves.

_“I’m fine Clarke.”_

_“I’m sorry about Raven. Let me check your head.”_

Clarke drops to her knees, leaning towards the brunette. She softly presses her fingers against the reddened skin of Lexa’s forehead.

_“You’ll probably have a pretty bad headache, but I’m pretty sure that you will be fine.”_

The blonde’s sweet smell invades the brunette’s senses. Mixed with the slightly salty smell of sweat from jogging is makes Lexa’s head swim. She has the overwhelming urge to lean forward and press her lips against Clarke’s. That thought causes Lexa’s body to seize up in panic. She reaches up, smacking Clarke’s hands off of her face. Lexa scrambles to her feet, body shaking with fear. She channels the panic into anger, lashing out at the blonde.

_“You’re not a doctor Clarke. Why don’t you stick you what you’re good at, slinging coffee?”_

Clarke’s mouth drops open in shock, not prepared for the brunette’s hurtful words. She stumbles slightly, unsteadily getting to her feet.

Lexa brushes off her workout clothes. She takes off running without glancing back; knowing that the crestfallen look on the blonde’s face will break her.

Clarke stands completely dumbfounded, mouth threatening to catch flies with how wide open it currently is. Raven’s voice breaks her out of her daze.

_“Wow. What a total bitch.”_

_“She’s not normally like that. A little uptight, but not outright rude.”_

_“Well. I don’t know what you see in her, Princess.”_

_“I don’t know what it is about her Raven, she’s just amazing.”_

_“Well. I don’t see it.”_

_“Like I said, she is not usually so intense.”_

_“Whatever. Let’s go Griffers, I am so ready to be done with this run.”_

The two girls continue on their path, Clarke wondering why the brunette was so harsh towards her.

**_~*~*~*~*~*_ **

Lexa is feeling the lack of caffeine. She completely forgot to stop and get coffee after her run-in with Clarke and the rabid dog that is apparently named Raven. It’s now nine hours later and she still has dinner plans with Anya before she can go to bed.

She knows that she isn’t going to make it through her last class without a coffee, and of course Anya used the last K-cup that they have for emergencies. So as much as she is loath to do so, Lexa makes her way towards Grounders.

The chiming of the front door bells is not met with the usual cheery voice of the blonde that Lexa loves to hear. Instead a slightly irritated voice rings out.

_“Welcome to Grounders.”_

Lexa makes her way to the counter. A brunette is stationed at the counter, eyes glued to her cell phone. She mouth is turned up in a slight smile, finger furiously typing out some sort of text message. Lexa clears her throat softly. The brunette holds up her index finger, finishing out the text message. She sends the text before looking up at Lexa.

Her eyes narrow slightly when she takes in the brunette in front of her.

_“Oh. It’s you. What do you want?”_

_“Excuse me?”_ Lexa is taken back by the brunette’s abrupt rudeness.

_“You heard me. What do you want to drink?”_

_“Um, what I normally get.”_

_“Which is?”_

_“I would like a large non-fat caramel macchiato. Two extra shots of espresso. No whip or froth. Heat the milk to one hundred and sixty five degrees exactly.”_

_“Got it.”_

_“The name for the order is…”_

_“I know what your name is, Lexa.”_

_“How?”_

_“Well besides the fact that you come in here every morning, and I used to be the main opening barista. I know who you are because I make it a point to remember the names of people who make my best friend cry.”_

_“What? Who did I make cry?”_

_“Don’t play stupid with me. You know what you did.”_

_“I’m not entirely sure what you are referring to.”_

_“Okay sweet cheeks, listen up. I’m only going to tell you this one time.”_

The brunette barista sets two cups down in front of the counter. She sets her lips in a scowl, narrowing her eyes in a glare.

_“Clarke is my best friend. We have known each other since we were in middle school. So I am obligated under the best friend code to protect her heart as if it were my own. You hurt her feelings today. And you owe her an apology.”_

_“I merely stated a fact. She is not authorized to practice medicine.”_

_“You don’t know anything about her life. So don’t jump to conclusions when you don’t have all of the facts.”_

_“I’m not entirely sure what you mean.”_ Lexa stares confusedly at the brunette.

_“What I mean is. You don’t know Clarke, so don’t assume that you do. You need to watch how you talk to that girl, because she is an amazing woman. I don’t know why, but she has taken a liking to you. So stop being such a dick and go apologize for treating her like shit this morning.”_

_“Ummm..”_

_“She spends her days off at the park across the street from here. She likes to sketch the fountain in the middle of the park. Go talk to her, even if it’s to tell her that you aren’t interested in her the way she seems to be with you.”_

_“I am not very good with words and feelings.”_

_“Neither am I. Clarke will help you figure it out. Give her this sickeningly sweet drink and kiss her ass until she forgives you.”_

_“Okay. Thank you….”_

_“Octavia.”_

_“Thank you Octavia. What do I owe you?”_

_“It’s on the house. If this happens again, I won’t be so nice to you.”_

_“If this is you being nice, I don’t ever want to be on your bad side.”_

_“You would be wise to remember that.”_

Lexa grabs the drinks on the counter, nodding slightly at the brunette as she makes her way out of the café. She stops in front of the crosswalk, waiting for the light to allow her to cross.

She spies the blonde quickly, hunched over a large sketchbook in the middle of the park. Her tongue is poked out of the side of her mouth in concentration, hands delicately moving across the mostly blank page. Lexa quietly sits down beside the blonde, careful not to break her concentration.

**_~*~*~*~*~*_ **

Clarke knows that Lexa is sitting down beside her. She knew as soon as the brunette walked up behind her. Regardless of how quietly the brunette approached, Lexa’s earthy smell alerted Clarke to her presence immediately.

Clarke continues her sketch, content to let the brunette suffer in silence for a little bit longer.

 

Lexa watches the blonde in awe. Her hands fly effortlessly across the page, sketching minute details that have to come from memory. Lexa is pretty sure that Clarke as not looked up from her book once since she sat down.

The brunette sips her coffee silently, continuing to watch the blonde work her magic. Bringing the fountain to life without even trying.

 _“What are you doing here, Lexa?”_ Clarke’s soft voice breaks through the charged silence.

 _“Um.”_ Lexa clears her throat, willing the words to come easily. _“I came to apologize for my actions earlier.”_

_“I’m not sure what you mean Lexa.”_

_“I was unfairly rude to you. And for that I am sorry.”_

_“Hmmmm…well you weren’t wrong.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“I’m not a doctor. I’m just a barista.”_

Lexa places her free hand on Clarke’s shoulder. _“I did not mean to be rude Clarke.”_

_“It’s fine Lexa.”_

_“No it’s not. My words were extremely harsh.”_

_“But they are still true.”_

_“Regardless. I shouldn’t have jumped down your throat. You were just trying to help me.”_

_“Why?”_

_“I’m not sure what you mean.”_

Glossy blue eyes flit up to lock on sorrow filled green.

_“Why were you so harsh?”_

_“I wasn’t aware that my words were going to upset you so much. I don’t seem to have much control over my mouth when you are around me.”_

_“Um…”_

_“You scare me Clarke. Your mere presence is enough to crumble me.”_

_“This is the strangest way that anyone has ever told me that they were attracted to me.”_

_“I’m sorry. I’m not great with words.”_

_“It’s fine Lexa.”_ Clarke tilts her head to the side, gesturing to the other cup next to Lexa. _“Is that for me?”_

_“Yeah. Octavia told me to bring it to you.”_

Lexa hands Clarke the cup. The blonde immediately tips the cup to her mouth, taking a generous drink of the now lukewarm beverage. A sigh of contentment leaves the blonde’s lips as she swallows the sweet drink.

_“Thank you.”_

_“Thank Octavia. She made it.”_

_“Yeah but she didn’t bring it to me, did she?”_

_“I suppose not.”_

_“So, I’m thanking you.”_

_“You’re welcome, Clarke.”_

Clarke turns her attention back to her sketch. She is completely aware of the brunette’s eyes on her as she works. Her lips curl up in a smile as she feels Lexa’s eyes burning against her flesh.

Watching Clarke work is like watching something come to life. Her every thought and feeling translates onto her page.

She isn’t sure how long they sit there, her eyes transfixed on every elegant move the blonde makes. The one thing that she is sure of is…..

She’s completely fucked when it comes to Clarke Griffin.

 

 **TBC**  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Alright lovely readers. That was the official chapter 1 of Barista’s Choice. I have wanted to update this for a while now. After last Thursday’s cop out, I decided that we need all of the fluff that we can get right now. So it took me a little bit longer to get this story where I wanted it to go. I assure that this will not be a normal story from me, I’m not sure that I can write Clexa angst. They deserve nothing but happiness after JFucker screwed us all over. So as always, I hope that you enjoyed the chapter, and that you are ready to join me for a fluffy/slow burn ride. Feel free to comment if you would like, or you can come talk to me on Tumblr. https://www.tumblr.com/blog/jeffrinamichelle.  
> Thanks for reading!!!


	3. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven and Anya should not be left alone!
> 
> Octavia is obsessed with Lincoln and pretty much nothing else.
> 
> Our girls have some bonding time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: A second update this week? This is what it means for me to not have a job. I hope that you guys enjoy this update. It was a lot of fun to write. Read on and if you feel so inclined, stop by on here or Tumblr and let me know what you thought.

 

**~~~Barista’s Choice~~~**

**\---Chapter 2---**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke Griffin’s day was not going according to plan. She had a lot of trouble falling asleep the night before, only to be woken up by Raven at five o’clock this morning. It wasn’t so much that Clarke hated running. She just hated running before the sun was up.

She was pretty excited when they ran into Lexa, at first. Until the brunette spewed that one hateful sentence towards the blonde.

So needless to say, she was pretty upset when she made her way into Grounder’s after finishing her run with Raven.

The two girls slid into a booth towards the back of the café, sweat glistening on their tired bodies.

After a few minutes of silence, Octavia walks up to their table holding two drinks and a brown paper sack. Setting the items on the table, the brunette scooches Raven over so she can slide into the booth across from Clarke.

 _“Why the long face, Princess?”_ Octavia questions, frowning at the look of defeat on her best friend’s face.

 _“It’s nothing O.”_ Clarke mumbles, head resting against the cool wood of the table.

_“I call bullshit. Tell Momma O what’s bugging you.”_

Raven scoffs, mouth full with a bite of the blueberry muffin that she pulled out of the bag. _“Don’t compare yourself to Abby.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because Octavia. When I look at you I don’t get the urge to say, Roses are red. Violets are Blue. I want to hump your face.”_

_“OH MY GOD Raven_!!!” Clarke’s head snaps up, shock and disgust written across her face. _“That’s my mother you’re talking about.”_

_“Doesn’t make it any less true, Clarke.”_

_“Gross.”_ Clarke groans, her head pressing back down into the table.

_“In all seriousness, why are you so down Princess? You look like somebody kicked your puppy.”_

_“She is being mopey because a certain brunette bombshell decided to piss in her cheerios. That Lexa chick that Clarke has been obsessed with. She was a total dick to the Princess. So that’s why she is upset.”_

_“Okay Clarke. I want to feel sorry for you, but I can’t. I told you when you took over mornings that Lexa was kind of a bitch.”_

_“That’s just the thing O. She isn’t a bitch to me. I mean yeah, she is pretty introverted and not at all talkative. I think that she is just hiding her true self. Something about her fascinates me and I want to get to know her better. I just don’t know if she wants the same.”_

_“If she doesn’t, it’s her loss Princess. You are an amazing woman and any guy or girl would be lucky to have you.”_

_“Aww shucks O. You’re going to make me blush.”_

_“Shut up and drink your coffee Clarke. We still have to go home and shower before class.”_

_“Can it, Reyes.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

The rest of Clarke’s day passes without further incidence, aside from being bored to death in her classes.

By the time she makes it back to her dorm, she is ready to keel over from exhaustion.  She is surprised that Raven isn’t passed out in her bed; she is usually in the middle of her mid afternoon nap around this time.

Pulling out her phone, the blonde notices that the person in question had sent her a text message an hour ago, right in the middle of her art history class.

**Rae Rae: (12:30 p.m.) _Hey Princess. You’ll have to head to the park without me today. Abby had a leaky faucet, so I had to go tighten it ;)_**

Clarke grimaces, being assaulted by a visual that she did not need. She types out her reply quickly.

**Princess Griffers: (01:30 p.m.) _RAVEN!!! Quit being disgusting!_**

**Rae Rae: (01:30 p.m.) _Abby and I are about to get disgusting._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:31 p.m.) _Jesus Christ!_**

**Rae Rae: (01:31 p.m.) _Funny. Abby was just screaming that in my ear._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:32 p.m.) _Okay seriously Raven. Where are you?_**

**Rae Rae: (01:32 p.m.) _Sorry Princess. You just make it too easy. Kind of like Abby._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:33 p.m.) _JFC!!!_**

**Rae Rae: (01:33 p.m.) _Sorry : ( Seriously though. I am stuck in class still. We got assigned partners for our final project. Of course I got partnered with Wick. And he wants to start right away, even though we have two months to finish the project. Kill me now._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:34 p.m.) _Keep talking about my mom and I might make that happen._**

**Rae Rae: (01:34 p.m.) _Please. You couldn’t hurt a fly._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:35 p.m.) _Maybe not. But I will hurt you._**

**Rae Rae: (01:35 p.m.) _Threatening a cripple? Why Clarke Griffin. That is just uncalled for._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:36 p.m.) _You can’t see me right now, but I am rolling my eyes at you. GO back to your project; I’m going to the park._**

**Rae Rae: (01:36 p.m.) _Don’t talk to strangers._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:37 p.m.) _Yes mom._**

**Rae Rae: (01:37 p.m.) _Oh sorry honey. Raven just stepped into the shower. I picked up her phone._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:38 p.m.) _Raven. I swear to god._**

**Rae Rae: (01:38 p.m.) _Okay, for real this time. I’ll stop._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:39 p.m.) _Thank you. I’m going to the park now. Wanna meet up for dinner in the quad?_**

**Rae Rae: (01:39 p.m.) _Word. I’ll text O-Face and let her know._**

**Princess Griffers: (01:40 p.m.) _Sweet. See ya later._**

**Rae Rae: (01:40) _;)_**

Clarke slips her phone into her jeans. She drops her backpack onto her bed, pulling out a sketch pad and a case of various pencils and pens. Slipping out of her dorm, Clarke makes her way out of the building.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke and Raven weren’t always the best of friends. They had a somewhat tumultuous beginning to their relationship. Clarke still feels slightly guilty about how they were introduced to each other.

It all led back to one person: Finn Collins.

Clarke met Finn at the beginning of her freshman year of college. He was everything that Clarke could possibly want in a boyfriend. He was attractive, attentive, charming, and crazy nice. Thinking back now, Clarke should’ve seen those as red flags.

Their relationship went from zero to sixty in a short amount of time. Clarke was in love, or so she thought.

She had been dating Finn for six months when she was introduced to Raven. By introduced, Clarke was tackled by the brunette in the middle of campus on her way to class. A pained wheeze escaped the blonde as the breath was knocked out of her from her impact on the ground.

_“Jesus.”_

Clarke’s eyes meet the narrowed glare of the brunette that is currently splayed out on top of her. If she wasn’t so busy being pissed off at the girl, she might’ve admitted that the other girl as pretty attractive.

_“What the fuck?”_

_“So you’re the homewrecker that’s been dating my boyfriend.”_

_“What in the hell are you talking about She-Hulk?”_ Clarke groans, rubbing her sore ribs with a grimace. _“Also, as much as I normally love having another woman on top of me, I usually get tackled onto a bed. Mind getting off of me?”_

The brunette grunts, slowly getting to her feet. She brushes off her jeans, not bothering to help Clarke up. Clarke scoffs, rolling her eyes at the rudeness of the other girl. Following the brunette to the nearest bench, Clarke takes a seat next to the girl.

_“Okay, mysterious brown-haired ninja. Mind telling me why you decided to attack me in the middle of the quad?”_

The brunette rolls her eyes at the blonde. _“First off blondie, name’s Raven. Secondly, I didn’t attack you.”_

Clarke laughs sardonically. _“So is it common practice where you grew up to tackle strangers to the ground?”_

_“No. It is common practice to attack whores who date other people’s boyfriends.”_

_“I’m pretty sure that I don’t know what you are talking about.”_

Raven laughs sarcastically. _“Finn Collins? Does that name ring any bells Princess?”_

_“How do you know my boyfriend?”_

_“Your boyfriend?? Funny.”_

_“I’m sorry?”_

_“Well Princess, your “boyfriend?” He’s actually my boyfriend. Has been for the past six years.”_

_“What?”_

_“Yeah. Hard as it is to believe. That charming motherfucker belongs to me.”_

Clarke stands up, pacing in front of the bench. “Why would I believe you? I don’t even know who you are.”

 _“You want proof Blondie?”_ Raven reaches her hand into her pocket, pulling out a wallet and what looks like a cell phone. She tosses the wallet towards Clarke, the blonde catching it with ease. Clarke opens the beat-up leather bi-fold. _“Check the last pocket on the left.”_ Clarke pulls a folded up piece of photo paper out of the wallet. Unfolding it reveals a battered picture of what seems to be a teenaged Finn next to the brunette. _“That enough proof for you?”_

_“I mean, this picture is like five or six years old. How do I know you aren’t some crazed ex-girlfriend or something?”_

_“Jesus. Really? That isn’t enough proof for you?”_   Clarke tilts her head slightly, staring the brunette down. _“Fuck. Fine….here.”_ Raven types something into the phone, holding the device out towards the blonde. Clarke grabs the device, holding it up towards her face. The home screen wallpaper on the phone is another photo of the two. This one looks much more recent, maybe a year old at the most.

Clarke can immediately feel tears welling in her eyes. She feels like a homewrecker right now and that is not a feeling that she particularly enjoys feeling. Sitting back down on the bench, Clarke hands the brunette her phone and wallet. She runs her fingers through her hair, trying to figure out what to say to the brunette.

 _“Shit…Fuck…”_ Clarke’s hands rub up and down her face, almost as if trying to rub the stress away. _“Look Raven. I am so sorry. I had no idea that Finn had a girlfriend.”_

_“Likely story.”_

_“No. I am so serious. I had no clue that he was already in a relationship. I would never do that to somebody else.”_

_“You know what Blondie?”_

_“Clarke.”_

_“Huh?”_

_“My name is Clarke.”_

_“Oh I know what your name is. I was snooping through Finn’s phone after all. I just like calling you Blondie.”_

_“Oh…well. Okay.”_

_“Anyway. I like you. Dammit I tried to hate you because who wants to like the girl that is fucking their boyfriend? But, you look like you’re being honest. So I believe you.”_

_“Well. For what it’s worth. I’m still really sorry.”_

_“Oh don’t worry about it Princess. I’ve known Finn for most of my life. He plays like he is a really sweet guy. But underneath all of that charm is a total skeeze. I’m honestly not surprised that he’s been cheating on me.”_

_“So why are you with him?”_

_“That my friend is a story that must be told over copious amounts of alcohol.”_

_“I am not old enough to go to a bar.”_

_“Who said anything about going to a bar? I have a mason jar full of moonshine that my friend Monty made. It is one hundred percent guaranteed to fuck you up.”_

_“I’m not sure…”_

_“Live a little Princess. We can get hammered and figure out a way to get back at Finn.”_

_“I’m in.”_

_“Yes!!! I knew that I liked you for a reason.”_

Clarke smiles at the brunette, both girls getting to their feet.

As it turned out, Raven’s idea of revenge was spreading rumors about Finn having herpes. She managed to spread the rumor around the entire campus within a month.

Finn transferred to a different university by the end of their freshman year.

Clarke and Raven became inseparable during that time. By their sophomore year, they requested to room together in a dorm. Neither girl heard from Finn Collins, asshole extraordinaire again.

**~*~*~*~*~***

There is something about this particular fountain that Clarke finds beautiful. It isn’t the nicest fountain that she has ever seen. It’s pretty old and beat up if she’s being honest. But there is something magical about the way it looks when the sun shines against the aged, slightly beat up cement. She feels so at peace when she sketches the imperfections imprinted in the structure from years of sun damage.

She is so far into her zone that she doesn’t hear Lexa walk up behind her. Normally, she would have been scared out of her skin by the surprise. But the wind is on Clarke’s side today. A small breeze whips through the park. The blonde is immediately hit by the scent behind her. A scent that she has familiarized herself with over the past couple of weeks since she first met the brunette. Lexa smells like life. Clarke isn’t really sure how to describe what the brunette smells like. Its grass, and trees, and fresh water rolling over rocks in a river. Life is the one word that comes to the blonde’s mind when she catches the scent of the brunette.

She stays quiet however, content to sit in comfortable silence with the brunette as Lexa sits down beside her. The only sounds come from the trickling fountain, the breeze, and the soft exhales that Lexa makes after drinking from her cup.

Clarke makes it through about half of her sketch before she can’t take the silence anymore. The brunette being so close to the blonde is enough to break her concentration. She wants to be mad at Lexa for the way she treated the blonde earlier, but Clarke has never been very good at holding grudges. She doesn’t need to let the brunette know that, though.

 _“What are you doing here, Lexa?”_ Clarke wills her voice to come out harshly, wincing when her tone is instead soft.

 _“Um.”_ The brunette replies, her honeyed voice causing the blonde to shiver slightly. _“I came to apologize for my actions.”_

Clarke had forgiven the brunette almost immediately after the incident occurred. She instead decides to play coy. _“I’m not sure what you mean Lexa.”_

_“I was unfairly rude to you. And for that I am sorry.”_

_“Hmmmm…well you weren’t wrong.”_

_“What do you mean?”_ Clarke spies the confused look on the brunette’s face out of her peripheral vision, a soft smile gracing the blonde’s face.

_“I’m not a doctor. I’m just a barista.”_

Clarke barely manages to stifle a groan as Lexa places a hand on her shoulder, sparks spreading throughout her body. _“I did not mean to be rude Clarke.”_

 _“It’s fine Lexa.”_ Clarke almost aches to tell Lexa the reason why she got so upset at an accurate comment, but that is a story for another day.

_“No it’s not. My words were extremely harsh.”_

_“But they are still true.”_ **–More so than you know.-** Clarke fights back a grimace, her inner dialogue trying to get the best of her.

_“Regardless, I shouldn’t have jumped down your throat. You were just trying to help.”_

Clarke feels the moisture gathering in her tear ducts. She sucks in a deep breath, willing the tears away.

 _“Why?”_ She chokes out, voice cracking with emotion.

_“I’m not sure what you mean.”_

Clarke finally tears her eyes away from her sketch, meeting the saddened green eyes that are focused on her.

_“Why were you so harsh?”_

Clarke swears that she can see a flash of regret in Lexa’s eyes.

_“I wasn’t aware that my words were going to upset you so much. I don’t seem to have much control over my mouth when you are around me.”_

Clarke’s eyes widen in shock. She wants to believe that Lexa is saying what she thinks she is saying.

 _“Um…”_ Clarke’s brain is fuzzy, that one syllable the only thing that she can conjure up.

_“You scare me Clarke. Your mere presence is enough to crumble me.”_

Clarke fights back the urge to jump up and scream. She definitely didn’t expect the brunette to admit being attracted to her, but she is so happy that the attraction is not one-sided.

_“This is the strangest way that anyone has ever told me that they were attracted to me.”_

Lexa’s face heats up, a blush spreading across her tanned skin. Clarke is fairly certain that shy Lexa is the sexiest thing that she has ever seen.

_“I’m sorry. I’m not great with words.”_

_“It’s fine Lexa.”_ Clarke smiles softly, spotting the to-go cup next to the brunette. _“Is that for me?”_

_“Yeah. Octavia told me to bring it to you.”_

Clarke takes the offered cup from Lexa. She immediately tips the cup to her mouth, taking a generous drink of the slightly cold beverage. She swears that Lexa watches her lips the whole time. She may or may not make more of a show out of taking a drink. She’s won’t admit it, but she loves the way that Lexa looks at her. When those green eyes zero in on the blonde, Clarke swears that her heart triples in speed. Lexa looks at her like she is the only person in the world. That feeling is something that Clarke can definitely get used to.

_“Thank you.”_

_“Thank Octavia. She made it.”_

_“Yeah but she didn’t bring it to me, did she?”_

_“I suppose not.”_

_“So, I’m thanking you.”_

The smirk that spreads across Lexa’s face causes Clarke’s breath to hitch.

_“You’re welcome, Clarke.”_

Clarke turns her attention back to her sketch, even though she knows that she won’t be able to focus on it. So instead she pretends to sketch, while sneakily glancing at the brunette.

Lexa continues to watch Clarke for a small amount of time, before turning her attention towards the fountain. As soon as the brunette looks away, Clarke turns to an empty page in her sketch book. Clarke finally gives into her immense urge to sketch the brunette.

Lexa has her face upturned towards the sky, eyes closed in pure bliss. The brunette looks so carefree at this moment, completely relaxed next to the blonde.

Clarke begins with the brunette’s jawline. Putting the perfection on paper just increases Clarke’s urge to press her lips against the tanned skin. She has to fight the urge to run her tongue across the chiseled bone.

Shaking away her pervy thoughts, Clarke continues sketching the brunette’s face. She decides to sketch Lexa’s eyes open rather than closed. She opts to keep the underlying sadness that always seems to line the hypnotizing green.

Clarke finishes her sketch of Lexa quicker than she originally anticipated; most of the brunette’s face was already cemented into the blonde’s memory.

When she deems the sketch complete, she closes her sketchbook, setting her supplies on the grass next to her.

_“Hey Lexa?”_

_“Hmmm?”_

_“I was wondering.”_

Lexa is snapped out of her only slightly inappropriate thoughts about the blonde next to her as Clarke’s soft voice rings out. She cracks open one eye, training it on the blushing blonde. Clarke’s eyes are focused on the grass, her hand absentmindedly pulling out blades of the plush green foliage.

 _“Yes Clarke?”_ The brunette smirks.

_“Do you have plans tonight?”_

_“I have dinner plans with my best friend, why?”_

_“Oh. Well never mind.”_

_“What were you going to ask me, Clarke?”_

_“I was going to ask if you would have dinner with me…my friends and I are eating in the quad tonight.”_ The blonde’s hopeful blue eyes glance up at Lexa. The brunette almost wants to cry at how vulnerable the blonde looks right now. It makes what she is about to do a thousand times harder. Even the simple thought of being asked out on a date causing Lexa to feel the beginning of a panic attack.

 _“I’m sorry Clarke.”_ The blonde’s smile drops, Lexa immediately looking away in shame. _“I can’t.”_

 _“Oh yeah, no. I totally get it.”_ Clarke grabs her art supplies, getting hastily to her feet.

_“Wait, Clarke.”_

_“It’s okay Lexa. Don’t worry about it. I have class, so I have to go.”_

Clarke hurriedly walks away, clutching her sketchbook to her chest.

Lexa’s eyes stay trained on the blonde as she hurries away. As soon as Clarke is out of sight, the brunette flops down on the grass, covering her eyes with her arm.

_“Shit.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke doesn’t usually cry. She has known Lexa for less than two weeks and the brunette has already been the cause of her tears. Twice. In one day.

By the time Clarke has reached her dorm room, she has managed to stop crying, again. Luckily, the room is empty when the blonde walks in.

She should’ve known better. There was no way in hell that a woman as beautiful as Lexa would be interested in plain old Clarke Griffin, barista extraordinaire. She was pretty sure that Lexa was giving her signals, subtle as they may be.  Unfortunately for Clarke, this time those singles were not what she thought they were.

Clarke knows that she has class in less than an hour, but she just can’t find the motivation to care. This last bout of emotional turmoil has taken a toll on the blonde. She decides to skip class and take a nap instead.

Setting the alarm on her phone, Clarke slips her shoes off before flopping down on her bed. She is fast asleep almost immediately after closing her eyes.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa still feels bad for shooting the blonde down, two hours later. She likes Clarke, more so than she ever thought possible. That is what scares her so much. She loved Costia, and she is still completely broken from her untimely death.

Lexa’s attraction for Clarke is strong, stronger than her initial attraction to Costia was. So if Clarke has this strong hold on Lexa already, allowing her to get any closer would likely destroy the brunette.

 - **Hodnes laik kwelnes. Hodnes laik kwelnes.**

The brunette’s inner mantra plays on repeat in her head as she unlocks the door to her apartment. Anya is spread out on the couch, absentmindedly channel surfing.

 _“Onya, hei.”_ The brunette closes the front door, walking into the living room. She scoops Anya’s legs up, sitting down on the couch before dropping her best friend’s legs back across her lap. **(Anya, hello.)**

 _“Sochu Heda?”_ The dirty blonde replies, not bothering to turn her attention away from the television. **(What’s up Commander?)**

 _“Skai, Onya.”_ **(The sky, Anya.)**

 _“Shof op.”_ **(Shut up.)** _“How was your day?”_

_“Fine. I spent a few hours in the park with Clarke.”_

_“Aw I see. Spending your day with Prisa Klark kom Skaikru. Wanheda to Leksa’s emotional barriers.”_ **(Spending your day with Princess Clarke of the Sky people. Commander of Death to Lexa’s emotional barriers.)**

 _“What? First off. What in the hell are you even talking about? Secondly,  hodnes laik kwelnes.”_ **(Love is weakness.)**

_“Yeah. Keep telling yourself that Leksa. I see the heart eyes that you get every time you talk about her.”_

_“What? No! I do not get heart eyes. I’m not going to put myself out there again. Losing Costia almost destroyed me.”_

Anya slides her legs off of Lexa, sitting up on the couch. She places her hand around her best friend’s shoulder, pulling her in for a hug.

_“I know Lexa. I know that losing Costia was the worst thing that has ever happened to you. But you are only twenty three years old. Are you really going to deny yourself another shot at happiness because you are scared?”_

_“I can’t Anya.”_ Lexa’s voice is weakened with emotion.

_“You can. You just have to try.”_

_“No. I just can’t. I can only be friends with Clarke; I can’t afford to give her anything else. I’m too broken.”_

_“If you say so, Lexa. There is no chance in hell that you can only be friends with that girl.”_

_“That is the way it has to be. Plus I don’t think that she will want anything more after today.”_

_“What happened today?”_

_“Well.”_ Lexa begins, clearing her throat _. “I had a nightmare last night. The first one that I have had in the last two weeks actually. So when I woke up, I went for my normal run. Well as my luck would have it today, I ran into somebody. Literally ran into them. They went off the deep end and started screaming at me. I think at one point they actually called me Robo Barbie. So anyway. Turns out that the person that I ran into is one of Clarke’s friends. Clarke was actually out jogging with her. When we ran into one another, we bumped heads. So Clarke tried to check out my head to make sure I didn’t have a concussion or something. Well her being so close to me made me freak out.”_

_“Oh no Lexa. What did you do?”_

_“I screamed at her and told her that she wasn’t a doctor. That she should stick to what she is good at, serving coffee.”_

_“Lexa….”_

_“I know. I know that I screwed up Anya. That isn’t even the worst part of it.”_

_“Oh shit. There’s more?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“God Lexa. Open your mouth and insert your foot next time.”_

Lexa rolls her eyes at her friend. _“So anyway. Like four hours ago, I went to Grounder’s to get some coffee. The girl behind the counter at the time was Clarke’s best friend Octavia. She yelled at me for making her best friend cry. Told me that she would pretty much kick my ass if I hurt her friend. Then she handed me two coffees and told me to take one to Clarke and apologize to her for being an ass. Clarke spends a lot of time at a park across the street from Grounder’s. So I took the coffee out there to her, apologized for being rude. And then I spent two hours in the park with Clarke while she sketched a fountain.”_

_“Ohhh. Well I don’t see how this was a bad thing.”_

_“I’m not finished.”_

_“Go on.”_

_“After Clarke was done sketching, she stared at my face for a few minutes. I was dozing off next to her sitting on the grass. She asked me if I had any plans tonight. I told her that I was going to dinner with you. She seemed sad after I told her that and said never mind. I told her to ask me what she wanted to ask me. So she proceeded to ask me out to dinner. I think that she was embarrassed to ask me out. So she mentioned that her friends were going to have dinner with her as well. Picking up some food on campus and eating in the quad.”_

_“Oh my god! That’s awesome. The girl that you are crushing on is crushing on you too.”_

_“Yeah. Well probably not anymore.”_

_“Why?”_

_“I told her that I couldn’t go out with her.”_

_“What!?!? Why???”_

_“Because I told you. I can’t allow myself to be weak again.”_

_“Lex…” Anya places her hand on Lexa’s knee. “You mean to tell me that Clarke isn’t worth the risk?”_

_“Hodnes laik kwelnes. I will never be weak again.”_

_“You’re making a huge mistake.”_

_“That may be. But I can’t do it Anya. I just can’t.”_

_“Fine. I’ll stop trying to meddle.”_

_“Thank you.”_

_“Yu enti?”_ The brunette questions, flipping through her facebook app on her phone. **(You hungry?)**

 _“Sha. Otaim.”_ Anya replies with a laugh. **(Yes. Always.)**

 _“Ogud kos dina?”_ **(Ready for dinner?)**

 _“Sha Heda. Teik oso gon we.”_ **(Yes Commaner. Let us leave.)**

 _“Kei Onya. Gyon op.”_ ( **Okay Anya. Get up.)**

_“Nami Heda.”_ **(Got it Commander.)**

_“Weron dula op yu gaf in choj op?”_ **(Where do you want to eat?)**

_“We can just grab something on campus if you want.”_

_“Foshou Onya.”_ **(Gladly Anya.)**

_“Let’s go eat.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Maybe Lexa would’ve caught on to Anya’s scheming if she wasn’t so exhausted. Fortunately for Anya, Lexa was too tired to catch onto her best friend’s plotting.

Anya immediately spots the object of her best friend’s affection sitting at a table outside with two girls seated next to her. They are digging into their to-go containers of what looks like gyros.

Anya turns towards Lexa with a grin on her face.

_“Hey Lex, I want Ray’s.”_

_“Ugh…”_ Lexa scowls. _“Burgers again Anya? Do you know how to eat anything else?”_

_“Um. Yes Lexa. Burgers. I also enjoy pizza. But I want a hamburger from Ray’s.”_

_“Fine. I’ll go get the food if you want to find us a place to sit.”_

_“You got it Heda.”_

Anya waits until Lexa is out of sight before making her way over the Clarke’s table. The blonde looks up from her plate first; a confused look spreads across Clarke’s face.

 _“Hi…Clarke right?”_ Anya questions, a smirk on her face.

_“Yes?”_

_“Awesome. So, I’m Anya. Lexa’s best friend. She had mentioned that you invited her to have dinner with you and your friends. I was hoping that the offer still stood.”_

_“Oh…well.”_ Clarke’s cheeks flush red. _“I was under the impression that Lexa wasn’t interested in having dinner with me.”_

_“Lexa is definitely interested. In a lot more than just having dinner with you Skai Prisa. She just hasn’t admitted it to herself yet.”_

_“Skai Prisa??”_

_“Oh it’s nothing bad. It means Sky Princess. It’s a nickname that I gave you when Lexa came home the first day that you working the morning shift.”_

_“Oh really?”_

_“Yeah. She came home in a daze. Kind of like a space cadet. I was going to go for something like space princess but I liked the way Sky Princess sounded. Like you fell from the sky and it dazed her. I dunno.”_

_“Okay Skai Prisa. What language is that in?”_

Anya chuckles. _“Can I sit with you guys?”_

_“Oh! Of course! Sorry, I wasn’t trying to be rude. Anya these are my best friends.”_

_“I’m Octavia.”_ Octavia looks up from her phone, holding her hand out in greeting.

_“Anya. Nice to meet you.”_

_“Likewise.”_

_“I’m Raven.”_ Dark brown eyes meet Anya’s, immediately taking her breath away. She sucks in a deep breath, holding her hand out.

_“Anya.”_

Raven grasps the other girl’s hand, a smirk plastered on her face. _“You’re like really fucking hot.”_

_“Um..thanks?”_

_“No..thank you. Damn. Like you give Abby a run for her money.”_

_“Raven!!”_ Clarke throws an onion at her friend’s face, smacking her in the middle of her forehead. _“Quit talking about my mom!”_

_“Can’t help it. Abby was my first love.”_

_“I thought that Finn was your first love.”_

_“Ummm…no. It was definitely Abigail Griffin.”_

_“Whatever. Anyway. Anya. So what language is Skai Prisa in?”_

Anya reluctantly removes her hand from Raven’s grip. She sits down next to the raven haired beauty.

_“You see Prisa, when Lexa and I were young we read a book series. It was called the hundred. It was a pretty good book series. Well this is this group of people that have a language. We called it Trigedasleng. We have added a bunch of words over the years. Growing up, we spoke on Trigedasleng when we were around adults. So Skai Prisa is Sky Princess in Trigedasleng. I have a few other names for you, but you’ll have to earn those.”_

_“Hey Anya.”_

_“Yes?”_

_“Are you my big toe?”_

_“I’m sorry?”_

_“Are you my big toe?”_

_“No. Why?”_

_“Because I want to bang you on all of the furniture in my house.”_

_“Raven!!!”_

_“What?”_ Raven turns to meet the horrified looks on Clarke’s face _. “It’s true.”_

 _“Um.”_ Anya feels the heat creeping in on her cheeks. She is not used to being flustered by another woman. Usually she is the aggressor in these types of situations. _“Thank you.”_

_“Anytime babe.”_

_“Hey Anya, they didn’t have cherry coke so I got you dr. pepper.”_ Lexa’s voice calls out, the brunette walking up towards the seating in the quad. Her face is scrolling through her phone, food tucked under her arm. She walks up to the table, food almost falling out of her arms in shock.

_“Robo Barbie!”_

_“Um, hello. Raven is it?”_

_“Yup that’s my name. You’ll hear it later when your bestie is screaming it out.”_

_“Oh my god Raven!! I am so sorry Lexa.”_

_“It’s fine. Anya?”_

_“Hmmm?”_

_“A word?”_ Anya raises an eyebrow at her friend. _“Nau!”_ **(Now!)**

_“Sha Heda.”_ **(Yes Commander.)**

Anya stands up. Raven grabs her hand as she walks away.

_“Don’t be gone too long gorgeous.”_

Anya smiles shyly.

_“ONYA!!”_

Anya reluctantly pulls her hand away, walking over to her best friend.

_“Sha?”_ **(Yes?)**

_“What do you think you are doing?”_ Lexa whispers harshly.

_“I am having dinner with my new friends.”_

_“Anya! You told me that you were done meddling.”_

_“Yeah I did. I was totally lying. At first I sat down with them so you would have to talk to Clarke. And then I met that wonderful piece of eye candy next to her. Now I am totally doing this for me. If you don’t want to be around Clarke, fine. But I am going to take Raven to my bed. So you are going to be a good best friend and help a girl out. Am I clear?”_

_“Crystal.”_

_“Good.”_

_“God. And you call me the Commander.”_

_“Well I taught you everything that you know.”_

_“True.”_

_“So. Let’s go back and have dinner with these hot girls. Because I don’t know about you, but I need to get laid.”_

_“Fine. But you owe me.”_

_“Oh no ma’am. I think that you owe me. I am not going to stand by and let you miss out on a chance with Wanheda. I was going to try and stay out of it. But I changed my mind. If you won’t spend time with her, I will force you.”_

_“You’re a dick Anya.”_

_“I’d rather be one than have one.”_

_“Gross.”_

_“Hey. I’m just being honest. Now…enough chitchat. I want to eat my hamburger before it gets soggy.”_

_“Fine. I still hate you.”_

_“Love you too boo.”_

The two girls make their way back over to the table. Anya sits down next to Raven, leaving the only empty seat between Clarke and Octavia. Lexa takes the empty seat with a soft sigh. She passes Anya her food before unwrapping her own.

 _“I’m sorry if you’re upset Lexa. I was under the impression that you and Anya had decided to eat with us.”_ Clarke’s soft voice cuts straight though Lexa’s chest.

_“I’m not upset Clarke. I just don’t like being surprised is all.”_

_“Well. Even if you didn’t want to eat with us, it looks like our friends didn’t give us much of a choice.”_

The two girls look over at their friends. They have scooted their chairs closer together, both turning to face the other.

_“Hey Raven?”_

_“Yes Angel?”_

_“The word of the night is legs. Wanna go back to my place and spread the word?”_

_“Oh man. That was a good one.”_

_“Thank you.”_

_“I have one.”_

_“Go on.”_

_“I’d like to get between your legs and eat my way straight to your heart.”_

_“Oh my god! That was amazing.”_

Lexa turns back to Clarke, eyes wide with surprise.

_“I can’t believe these two.”_

_“It’s been like this since she sat down with us. Right O?”_

_“Oh. I have no idea. I haven’t heard a thing that has been said at this table.”_

Octavia looks back down at her phone, fingers sliding across the screen with ease. She looks up periodically, only to take a bite of her food before turning her attention back to her phone.

_“Of course you weren’t listening. What’s Lincoln up to?”_

_“He’s at the gym right now.”_

_“Well I can’t say that I am surprised.”_

Octavia looks up from her phone, meeting Clarke’s gaze. She gathers up her leftovers, standing up quickly.

 _“Well bitches, it’s been real. I’m going to hang out with my boyfriend. I’ll see you guys later.”_ The brunette’s eyes flit over, spying Lexa for the first time. _“Oh hey Lexa. When did you get here?”_

Lexa laughs, taking a sip of her mountain dew. _“A bit ago.”_

_“Oh well…sorry to run but, I’m not sorry. So bye!”_

Octavia walks away without another word, leaving Clarke and Lexa alone seeing as Anya and Raven are still in their own world. The two girls finish their dinners in silence, trying to ignore their friends across from them.

_“So Raven. You should totally come over to Lexa and I’s apartment.”_

_“Oh should I now?”_ Raven leans in towards Anya, a smile on her lips.

_“Yeah. Because of reasons.”_

_“Oh yeah? What kind of reasons are we talking about here?”_

_“Does it really matter?”_

_“May….”_ Raven’s words are cut off as Anya smashes their lips together. Both girls moan simultaneously, deepening the kiss quickly.

 _“Okay.”_ Lexa turns to Clarke, grimacing slightly. _“Maybe we should give them some alone time?”_

 _“Yeah. I guess so.”_ Clarke replies, gathering her trash from the table.

 _“Can I walk you back to your dorm?”_ Lexa’s hopeful smile causes a flutter in Clarke’s chest.

_“Of course. I’m ready when you are.”_

Lexa gathers her trash. She holds out her hand, gesturing towards Clarke’s rubbish. The blonde smiles, handing the brunette her packaging. Lexa takes her and Clarke’s trash to the bin, tossing the garbage away. Clarke slings her backpack over her shoulder, walking over to Lexa. She comes to a stop beside the other girl, a small grin on her face.

_“Ready?”_

_“Yup.”_

The two girls begin walking towards the dorms, comfortable silence enveloping them.

Lexa is the first one to break the silence.

_“I’m really sorry about Anya. She can be kind of intense.”_

Clarke laughs, her melodic voice sending shivers down Lexa’s spine.

_“It’s totally fine Lexa. I mean, you’ve met my friends. Raven is pretty intense as well. I just feel bad. Like she forced you to eat with us.”_

Lexa glances over at the blonde, her downcast gaze making Lexa’s heart beat painfully against her ribcage.

_“Oh no Clarke. Don’t feel like that. If I didn’t want to eat with you guys, I wouldn’t have stayed.”_

_“Well that is comforting to hear.”_

_“I’m sorry if I made you feel that way. I have been doing a very good job at upsetting you lately.”_

_“It’s not your fault.”_

_“How is me being rude to you not my fault? I am not sure that I understand.”_

_“I made assumptions about you that I shouldn’t have and I made you uncomfortable. So I can understand why you would react harshly to certain things that I have said to you.”_

_“You are wrong sky girl. You have never done anything to make me uncomfortable. I have reacted to innocent statements and requests in horrible ways. And for that I am sorry. I never meant to make you feel sadness.”_

_“Thank you.”_

Lexa’s eyes bore into Clarke’s. Her intense gaze making Clarke’s heart race.

_“You need not thank me for apologizing for my actions.”_

_“Regardless. If I made you uncomfortable in any way, I am sorry.”_

_“You didn’t.”_

_“No? Well that’s good.”_ The two girls stop in front of Clarke’s building. Lexa shifts uncomfortably on her feet, shoving her hands into her jean pockets. _“Well. This is me. Thank you for walking me back to my dorm, Lexa.”_

_“It was my pleasure, Clarke.”_

_“I’ll see you tomorrow morning, I presume?”_

_“Your presumption would be correct. See you later Clarke.”_ Lexa turns to walk away, stopping when she feels the blonde’s hand on her arm.

 _“Wait.”_ Clarke drops her hand from Lexa’s arm as the brunette turns back around. _“Do you maybe want to come up for a little while?”_

Lexa feels the bile rising in her throat, panic settling in her stomach. _“Clarke. I don’t know if that is such a good idea.”_

_“I just. Look Lexa. I know that you aren’t interested in me. And I am totally fine with that. I just really enjoy spending time with you. It would be awesome if we could be friends.”_

_“I guess that would be alright.”_

_“Besides, do you really want to go back to your apartment right now? Five bucks says Anya and Raven are banging right now.”_

_“Good point. Well new friend. Lead the way.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke and Raven’s dorm room is exactly what Lexa thought it would be. Clarke’s side is cluttered but not quite messy. She has an easel set up in the corner of her room, a half done sketch imprinted on the canvas. Sketchbooks are strewn across her bed, pencils littering the otherwise clean comforter.

Raven’s side of the dorm on the other hand is what Lexa would consider complete anarchy. Miscellaneous items are strewn across every available surface. Clothes, books, and various mechanical items are taking residence on every inch of Raven’s side of the dorm.

 _“Um. Holy cow. I’m really sorry about the mess. I’m usually a much cleaner person. I’ve just been really busy with classes. Give me a second to clean up my crap.”_ Clarke drops her backpack on the floor, rushing to gather her sketching supplies off of her bed.

_“Clarke its fine. Anya is a total slob. So if you think that Raven is bad, you should come over sometime and see her room. It’s bad”_

_“Make yourself at home. I’ll just be a minute.”_

_“Don’t worry about me. I am a professional when it comes to nesting.”_

Clarke laughs, moving her supplies to place them on her desk. She spends a few moments gathering a few stray items of clothing that were haphazardly thrown on the floor in her haste to get dressed this morning. Walking into the bathroom, Clarke tosses the clothes into the laundry hamper. She takes a moment to check out her reflection, she tucks a few stray hairs behind her ear. When she deems her reflection presentable, Clarke leaves the small bathroom.

The blonde has to fight back a gasp as she takes in the sight in front of her. Lexa is splayed out on her small full sized bed. The brunette’s tongue is peeking out of the side of her mouth, teeth biting down softly on the tip as she taps away on her cell phone. Her fingers fly quickly across the screen, eyebrows furrowed as concentrates on her task at hand. Clarke covers her mouth with her hand, barely managing to stifle a giggle at the exasperated look on the brunette’s face.

_“Oh dammit.”_

_“Everything alright?”_

Lexa looks up from her phone, meeting Clarke’s concerned gaze. _“Yeah. It’s nothing.”_

_“What is it?”_

_“It’s stupid.”_

Clarke laughs. _“What is it Lexa?”_

_“It’s just. I can’t get past this level of Candy Crush.”_

Lexa’s eyes close at the stupidity of her statement. She expects Clarke to laugh at her. Her eyes open when the laughter doesn’t come. Clarke is standing that the end of her bed, an amused smile on her face. Lexa breath catches in her throat at the sight of the blonde.

_“What level are you stuck on?”_

_“I am on level ninety seven right now.”_

_“Oh man. I remember level ninety seven. That is a tough level. I beat that one a couple of months ago. It took me a while.”_

_“It wouldn’t be so bad but I am on my last life and I have like thirty five minutes left until I get another life.”_

Clarke climbs onto the empty side of the bed, scooting close to the brunette.

_“Well I can help you if you want.”_

_“Sure.”_ Lexa feels her chest constricting, the close proximity of the blonde causing her thoughts to short circuit.

 _“Awesome.”_ Clarke leans over the small space of the bed, her hair falling in front of the brunette’s face. Lexa sucks in a breath as the blonde’s heavenly sent assaults her senses. Her nostrils flare as she takes in the warm scent of the blonde.

To Lexa, Clarke smells like summer. Like glorious sunshine and a warm breeze against your skin. Freshly cut grass mixed with newly bloomed roses.

It takes all of Lexa’s willpower to not grab the blonde and kiss her senseless. In this moment, Lexa almost forgets that she is emotionally stunted, unable to love again.

When Clarke’s hand brushes up against Lexa’s arm, it’s almost too much. The blonde’s soft skin sends ripples of electricity shooting throughout Lexa’s nerves. Her toes curl in pleasure from the intensity of the other girl’s presence.

 _“You just have to start here.”_ Clarke’s finger presses softly against Lexa’s phone screen; her husky voice breaking the electrified silence.

_“Okay.”_

With Clarke’s help, Lexa finally manages to beat the level that she has been stuck on for the past two months. She should feel relief, but the blonde’s close proximity leaves her unable to relax.

_“How long have you been playing Candy Crush?”_

_“Not long. It’s actually Anya’s fault that I play at all.”_

_“Is that so?”_

_“Yeah. She kept sending me life requests on facebook. I couldn’t take it anymore, so I relented and downloaded the app on my phone. Now I can’t stop playing the damn game.”_

_“Of course you would be mad about Anya getting you addicted to a stupid game.”_ Clarke laughs airily, the melodic sound making Lexa’s eyes roll into the back of her head. She’s thankful that the blonde is still focused on her game, oblivious to her body’s traitorous reactions.

_“Yeah. Well I don’t play it very often. Just sometimes when I finish class assignments early. Or when Anya goes on a weird kick and plays nonstop for a week. I might as well not waste all of the free lives.”_

_“You and Anya seem close.”_ Clarke pulls away from the brunette, much to Lexa’s dismay. The blonde settles her body against the headboard, turning her body to face Lexa.

_“She is practically my sister. We grew up living next door to each other. Neither one of us have any siblings, so we became really close. She’s been with me through everything.”_

_“Where did you grow up?”_

_“We are both from Portland, Oregon. What about you?”_

_“I am from San Diego originally. Octavia and her brother Bellamy and I grew up in the same neighborhood. We’ve all been friends since O and I were in kindergarten.”_

_“That’s awesome.”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“So tell me. Why did you choose to major in art?”_

_“I have always wanted to be an artist. My mother was not okay with my plans to be an artist because she didn’t think that it was an honest career. She is a neurosurgeon. So she wanted me to follow in her footsteps and get my degree in medicine. My dad was an engineer but he liked to draw in his spare time. He wanted me to follow my dreams. So that was my plan. I was going to go to college and get my degree in art.”_

_“Well isn’t that what you are doing?”_

_Clarke sighs. “Yeah it is now.”_

Lexa’s brow furrows in confusion. _“What do you mean?”_

_“Well my freshman year I was premed.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Well when my dad died, mom decided that I was going to get my doctorate in medicine.”_

_“Oh Clarke, I’m so sorry.”_

_“It’s fine Lexa. It’s been ten years since he died.”_

Lexa scoffs incredulously, lying back against the headboard. _“So you mean to tell me that your mom had your life planned out when you were like ten years old?”_

_“I was eleven and yes.”_

_“What a bitch.”_

_“Yeah. She can be. I know that she just wants what is best for me. She knows that being an artist isn’t always a lucrative career.”_

_“But it makes you happy, shouldn’t she want that?”_

_“She doesn’t see it that way. It doesn’t matter now. I changed my major to art after my first semester.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Well. I just wasn’t happy. I knew that I could do it. I just wasn’t happy. So one day O asked me if my dad would want to see me so miserable. I knew that the answer was no. That he would want me to be happy. So I marched down to my counselor’s office and switched my classes for the next semester.”_

_“Do you ever miss it?”_

_“Sometimes. I love helping people. But art is what makes me happy. So I don’t regret it.”_

_“That’s good. Can I see some of your work?”_

_“Sure. Let me just go grab one of my sketchbooks.”_

_“I’ll grab one. Just stay there.”_

Clarke laughs. _“Okay. Whatever you say ma’am.”_

Lexa gets to her feet, making her way to the blonde’s desk.

Clarke’s eyes follow the other girl, trying to commit every curve to memory. She takes in the curves of the brunette’s hips, her toned arms. Her mouth goes dry as she takes in the curve of Lexa’s behind. The tight denim of her jeans stretched over her toned legs. The defined muscles in her thighs likely the result of her daily runs. Clarke bites her lip to stifle a groan, the urge to rake her nails over the coarse denim threatening to consume her being.

Clarke digs her nails into the fabric of her jeans, trying to chase away her inappropriate thoughts. She knows that Lexa isn’t interested in anything more than friendship from her, but she can’t help her body’s reactions to the other woman. Sometimes she feels like Lexa’s gaze lingers on her lips while she talks. Or she’ll feel Lexa’s eyes on her body when she moves around the café.

It’s all terribly confusing for the blonde. She felt an instant connection when she met the brunette. She was fairly certain that Lexa felt the same connection. Or at least the shared attraction to her.

Knowing that Lexa doesn’t feel attraction towards the blonde makes the blonde sad. But she is a human being. Humans are known for being inherently selfish beings. So she will take whatever the brunette will give her. Be it friendship or awkward indifference.

As Lexa resituates her body on the bed, Clarke can’t help but hope that maybe her earlier instincts about the brunette were correct. Maybe Lexa is attracted to her. Maybe she is just afraid of giving in to her feelings. Clarke is pretty sure that Lexa is hiding something big beneath her mile high concrete walls that she has constructed around her heart. There is a lingering sadness laced within her beautiful green eyes, a sorrow that Clarke wants to help erase.

 _“Is this book okay?”_ Lexa questions, holding out a slightly beat up sketchbook.

 _“Whichever one you picked is fine, Lexa.”_ Clarke reassures, an easy smile being directed towards the brunette.

For now, Clarke will take the friendship that Lexa is offering with open arms.

She will be the best damn friend that Lexa has ever had, aside from Anya of course.

She’ll just hope that Lexa comes to terms with her feelings. The she swallows her pride and gives Clarke a chance to make her happy.

 _“Oh my gosh. When did you do this one?”_ Lexa’s eyes are wide with a mix of wonder and what looks like fear.

Clarke breaks her gaze from the brunette’s face, looking down at the picture in Lexa’s lap. Her eyes widen in shock when she realizes what sketch the brunette has turned to.

The picture in Lexa’s lap is the one that Clarke did earlier that afternoon, when they were at the park together. Lexa’s normally stoic nature is relaxed and free in the sketch, much like she had been while resting in the grass. The slight breeze rolling through the park has Lexa’s hair cascading around her relaxed shoulders. Clarke is fairly certain that this is her best sketch of the brunette.

That is what scares her the most. She knows that the brunette is going to freak out about the picture. There is no way that somebody with only friendly feelings could sketch with such alarming precision, regardless of skill.

Clarke is afraid that her newly forged friendship with Lexa will be over before it even has a chance to blossom.

How in the hell is she going to explain this?

 

**TBC**

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Well lovelies, that was chapter two. I hope that you enjoyed this update. Let me know what you thought on here or you can hit me up on my Tumblr. Until next time Awesome NERDS!!!


	4. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -The group goes out to a bar.  
> -Clarke has a new love interest.  
> -Lexa is green with jealousy.  
> -Ranya decides to meddle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay Clexakru. Here it is. I just want to warn you guys that while there is a lot of Clexa interaction in this chapter, I am calling this story slow burn for a reason. Lexa is still being stubborn, so I thought that I would introduce somebody to shake things up a bit. As always, I hope that you guys enjoy. I would love to know what you thought of this chapter! Read ON!

~~~Barista’s Choice~~~

 

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke only wants two things to happen at this very moment. Maybe she slightly wishes for a zombie apocalypse to come and destroy the world.

Since that scenario isn’t likely to happen, Clarke would be perfectly content for the floor underneath her bed to open up and swallow her whole.

Clarke would give anything to take away the mortification of telling the brunette next to her about the creepily accurate portrait that she drew earlier today.

Since the world isn’t on Clarke’s side, she has to come up with a good reason for having a sketch of Lexa in her book. At least this sketchbook only has one picture of the brunette.

 _“Uh.”_ Clarke laughs uneasily, rubbing her hand across the back of her neck. _“I did that portrait this afternoon. When we were at the park.”_

 _“I thought that you were drawing the fountain.”_ Lexa’s confused look is probably the cutest thing that Clarke has ever seen.

_“I was. And the fountain is awesome. I’ve also sketched the fountain like a million times. And I looked over at you and you were looking up at the sky. And you just looked really beautiful. You just looked so relaxed and I just had to sketch you. And I’m totally being creepy and now I’m babbling. Please just kill me now.”_

_“Clarke.”_ Lexa laughs, placing her hand on the blonde’s leg. _“Calm down. It’s fine. It’s a really good sketch. It’s like extremely good. You are ridiculously talented Clarke.”_

_“Thank you. It’s nothing really. Just a doodle.”_

_“Don’t sell yourself short. This is amazing. I wish that I could just “doodle” and have it turn out like that.”_

Clarke feels a blush rise up on her cheeks. _“It’s really easy when you have good subject matter.”_

_“Would you be okay with me keeping it? I mean it’s just really, really good. I’m not like a narcissist or anything. It’s just like really good and I would love to have it. If that is okay with you of course. I would totally understand if you said no. Now I am babbling.”_

_“Lexa.”_ Clarke laughs, setting her hand on the hand that is still resting on her leg. _“I am honored that you went this sketch. By all means.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“I’m positive. Take it.”_

_“Thank you.”_

_“Of course.”_

Lexa carefully tears the sketch out of the book. She places the sketch on top of the book, setting the items on the bedside table.

_“So I see you like to sketch people in your spare time. People and fountains?”_

Clarke laughs, cheeks reddening slightly. _“I pretty much sketch anything. I mostly sketch people. Usually just people walking around on campus. Or every once in a while I can get Raven or Octavia to model for me. More so Octavia, because Raven hates to sit still.”_

_“Well anytime you want to draw me, go right ahead. I don’t mind.”_

_“You might regret that statement later on.”_

_“I doubt it.”_

_“If you say so. So what do you want to do?”_

_“Like right now?”_

_“Yeah. I mean. I have a couple movies. Or we can watch something on Netflix.”_

_“Whatever you want to do is fine with me.”_

_“Okay. Well what kind of movies do you like?”_

_“I don’t really watch a lot of movies. When I do watch something, it’s usually a documentary.”_

_“Okay, yeah no. I will pick the movie.”_

Clarke leans over the side of her bed, grabbing her laptop from underneath. She boots up the device, typing in her lock screen passcode. As soon as the laptop boots up, she opens Chrome, opening up Netflix. Clarke logs into her Netflix, clicking on one of the movies in her queue. She settles the laptop between her and Lexa before settling back down on the bed.

_“So what did you decide on?”_

_“From Dusk till Dawn.”_

_“I can’t say that I have seen that movie.”_

_“Oh no? It’s one of Quentin Tarantino’s classics.”_

_“That’s fine with me.”_

The two girls settle down on the bed as the movie begins.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa knows that she isn’t in her room when she wakes up. First off, the smell of the room is different. The pillow that she has nestled into doesn’t smell like her laundry detergent.

Secondly, she doesn’t normally have blonde hair splayed across her face when she is at home.

Wait? Blonde hair? Panic settles in Lexa’s belly. Her heartrate spikes and her breathing becomes slightly spastic. She feels the body next to her shift, (Wait? Body next to her?) nuzzling against her neck. Lexa feels the warm exhale across her skin, goosebumps being left in their wake.

 _“Mmmmmh.  Go back to sleep.”_ Clarke’s husky, sleep laden voice causes the brunette to shiver.

Lexa relaxes as her mind catches up with her body. She remembers coming over to Clarke’s dorm room. She remembers the sketch that Clarke gave to her. They then decided to watch some horror movie on Netflix that Lexa could care less about. Apparently they also fell asleep. Lexa doesn’t remember falling asleep, but she also doesn’t remember much of the movie past the title screen.

Maybe if she wasn’t so busy focusing on the blonde that is practically on top of her. Clarke’s legs are intertwined with hers. Her arm is wrapped tightly around Lexa’s waist. Clarke’s face is pressed against Lexa’s collarbone, nose against the skin of her neck.

The cuddling isn’t completely one-sided. One of Lexa’s hands is wrapped up in Clarke’s hair, attempting to press the blonde deeper into her neck. Her other arm is resting underneath the blonde, fingers curled against her hip.

Lexa feels an almost overwhelming sense of belonging in the blonde’s arms. She feels safe and completely at home Clarke’s arms. The feeling of comfort currently coursing throughout the brunette’s veins is something that she hasn’t felt since Costia died. That feeling of comfort starts so melt away, turning into a sense of panic.

**-Hodnes laik kwelnes.**

Careful not to jostle the still slumbering blonde, Lexa untangles her body from Clarke’s tight grip. The blonde lets out a pathetic groan before settling down against Lexa’s pillow. A soft sigh leaves Clarke’s mouth as she snuggles deeply into the pillow, tucking her arms under the fabric.

**-Hodnes laik kwelnes.**

The brunette leaves the dorm room with a sigh, her body aching to be back in the blonde’s arms. She shuts the door behind her quietly, before making her way out of the dormitory.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke knows that she is alone before she opens her eyes. She can still smell the brunette on her pillow but the warmth of the brunette’s body is no longer surrounding her. She misses the warmth of Lexa’s body fiercely. She tries to will her body back to sleep, burying her face into the pillow that Lexa was using, but it is no use. Her body craves the other girl’s arms and it is unwilling to allow her a moment of peace without the brunette.

The opening and closing of the door is what finally makes Clarke unbury her body from her warm bed.

_“Well, well, well. Look at you Miss Reyes. The walk of shame looks good on you.”_

_“Fuck off Griffin.”_

Raven stumbles into the dorm room, sporting her best JBF’ed hair. Her shirt is buttoned up wrong. And Clarke can’t be positive, but she is pretty sure that Raven’s collarbone is sporting a pretty impressive hickey.

_“You look like you got banged, hard.”_

Raven laughs. _“I don’t kiss and tell Princess.”_

Clarke scoffs, sitting up in her bed. _“Since when?”_

_“Since forever.”_

_“Oh my god!”_

_“What?”_

_“Raven? Are you in like with this girl?”_

_“No…”_ Raven’s eyes drop to the floor.

_“Oh my god. You totally are!”_

_“Shut up Griffin.”_

_“Oh my god! This is awesome!”_

_“Clarke. I swear to god, I am going to thump you.”_

_“I’m telling Octavia.”_

_“Don’t you fucking dare.”_

_“Yeah. I’m telling her.”_

_“CLARKE!!!!”_ Raven runs across the small room, jumping onto the small bed. She slams her body on top of Clarke’s both girls landing with an ‘oof’ against the mattress. Raven pins Clarke’s hips to the bed with her knees. She sits up straight, putting all of her body weight against Clarke’s sternum.

_“Get off of me!”_

_“You are going to pay for your insolence, Griffin!”_ Raven **THUMPS** Clarke’s forehead with her thumb and index finger.

_“Raven Reyes is in like!!!!”_

_“God dammit Clarke!”_ Another **THUMP** is flicked against Clarke’s head. _“Stop!”_ ***THUMP***

 _“Okay! Jesus! Just stop flicking my forehead for fuck’s sake.”_ Clarke groans, hand rubbing her forehead in pain. _“Ow! You’re such a dick Raven.”_

_“You love it.”_

_“Not really. Now seriously. Get off of me; you reek of sex right now.”_

Raven laughs, climbing off of her friend, settling down in the bed next to her.

_“I know. Isn’t it great?”_

_“Maybe for some people.”_

Raven coos sarcastically. _“Awww. Is little Clarkey jealous? If I am not mistaken, a certain brunette was not present in her apartment last night. Did she perhaps stay the night with a certain blonde bombshell?”_

_“Ugh. She did in fact stay the night Raven, but I am sad to report that there was no lady lovin’ in this bed. Plus she left while I was still sleeping.”_

_“Wham! Bam! Thank you ma’am!”_

_“Shut up Raven. It wasn’t like that. Lexa and I are just friends.”_

_“Yeah sure. And I didn’t get laid last night.”_

_“We definitely know that is a bold faced lie.”_

_“Exactly.”_

_“Ugh…what am I going to do Raven?”_

_“About what?”_

_“About Lexa dummy.”_

_“I don’t know.”_

_“I just…”_ Clarke runs her fingers through her sleep mussed locks, tugging slightly on the ends. _“I really like her. Ugh….what am I going to do?”_

 _“Is she interested in you?”_ Raven questions, wrapping an arm around her friend’s shoulders.

_“I don’t know. I mean I think so. Sometimes I catch her staring at me longingly. Or looking at my lips when I talk to her. But sometimes she is really stoic and cold towards me. I can’t tell. Grrr.”_

_“Well babe, I wouldn’t worry about it. If she likes you, then she does. If not, then move on.”_

_“You say it like it’s just that easy Raven.”_

_“It is. You’re hot Clarke. If she isn’t interested, you’ll have no problem landing another girl. Or dude. Although, you haven’t dated or hooked up with any guys recently. You’ve kind of been indulging in Sapphic pleasures lately.”_

_“Oh my god Raven! Shut up.”_ Clarke smacks her best friend’s shoulder.

_“What? It’s true. Nothing wrong with strict lady lovin’ Clarkey.”_

_“Good lord. I can’t even with you right now.”_

_“Well I am all out of advice anyway. I need to sleep.”_

_“Oh? Did Anya keep you up all night? What time is it anyway?”_

_“It was like four a.m. when I walked in.”_

_“Shit!!”_

_“What?”_

_“I have to be at work in an hour.”_

_“Oh yeah. O told me to tell you that she was going in for you this morning. She wanted some extra hours and when I told her that Lexa was likely here overnight, she was all about taking the shift. She probably wants you to get laid too.”_

_“You guys are assholes.”_

_“We are just trying to make sure that you are happy Clarke. If we don’t help, you guys will dance around each other forever.”_

_“It doesn’t matter Raven. Lexa only wants to be friends with me. She doesn’t want anything else.”_

_“That’s not what Anya told me.”_

_“Oh? Did you guys actually have a chance to do more than fuck each other’s brains out?”_

_“Well I mean we had a few breaks between rounds.”_

_“And so my lack of a love life was pillow talk? Gross.”_

_“I mean I could tell you something else. Like there’s this thing that she can do with her tongue.”_

_“RAVEN!!! NO!!! Get the fuck out of my bed now!!”_

_“But Clarke…”_

_“No. Absolutely not. Go lay in your own bed before I tit punch you.”_

_“Well that’s just rude.”_

_“It is way too early for you to relive your hot night of lesbian sex with me.”_

_“Fine. You’re no fun. I’m going to sleep. Wake me up when you get done with class.”_

_“I’ll think about it.”_

_“Oh come on Clarke, you know that I can’t sleep if you don’t promise to wake me.”_

_“You know I’ll wake you up.”_

_“Love you babe.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Avoiding Clarke was surprisingly easy. Since the two girls had different majors, their classes are on opposite sides of the campus. She threw herself into her classwork and picked up extra hours at her waitressing job. In her minute amount of spare time, Lexa made the decision to learn how to play the guitar.

The first week went by without any slipups. Lexa only went to Grounder’s in the early afternoon when Octavia was on shift. The younger brunette would make Lexa’s drink without questioning her about her sudden change in pattern.

It was the end of the first week when Lexa came to the realization that she missed the blonde, terribly. She missed her bright smile, quirky personality. More importantly, Lexa missed the little doodles that Clarke would leave on her to-go cups.

So by that Saturday morning, Lexa not so subtly asked Anya to get Clarke’s cell phone number from Raven. She couldn’t muster up the courage to text the blonde until eleven o’clock that night. After finally nailing the song that she had been practicing, Lexa finally reached out to Clarke.

**_Unknown Number: (11:03 p.m.) Hey Clarke. It’s Lexa. I got your phone number from Raven. I hope that is okay. Sorry that I haven’t been in contact with you lately. I’ve been really busy with classes._ **

**_Skai Prisa: (11:03 p.m.) Hey Lexa! It’s nice to hear from you. I thought that I did something to freak you out and you were never going to talk to me again. I am glad to know that you’ve just been busy. I mean, not glad but….you know what I mean. I was worried because you haven’t been coming into the café in the morning. O says that you’ve been coming in during her shifts._ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (11:04 p.m.) I’m terribly sorry that my absence led you to believe that you had done something wrong. I swear that you did nothing to freak me out. I was a little bit shocked when I woke up in your arms but that was not your fault._ **

Lexa doesn’t want to lie to the blonde. She wants to tell Clarke that she has been avoiding communicating with or seeing the blonde. That she is having a terrible struggle with her feelings towards the other girl. That she had to distance herself so she didn’t do something stupid. That she wishes that she wasn’t broken. She wants to give into the signals that her heart is giving her concerning the blonde. She wants to grab Clarke and kiss her senseless. Lexa wants to take Clarke out on dates and she wants hold her hand in public. She wants to call Clarke her girlfriend and do all of the stupid, mushy things that couples do. But she can’t open her heart up to anyone ever again. Losing Costia almost killed the brunette, and she can’t go throw something like that again. So she makes the logical decision, listening to what her head is telling her to do. She is only able to offer Clarke friendship.

When her heart fights with her head, Lexa has a tendency to get overwhelmed. So she had to take a step back and avoid contact with Clarke until she felt like she was back in control. She is comfortable with phone contact, but she isn’t ready to face the other girl yet. So Lexa takes a minute to come up with a white lie to tell Clarke, careful not to hurt the other girl’s feelings.

I have been coming into the café in the afternoon because I had to switch one of my class times, so I am in class early in the morning until around two. I am really sorry that I haven’t been able to see you.

Lexa sets her phone down with a sigh. She feels bad about lying to the blonde, but she is totally afraid of telling Clarke the truth. Clarke doesn’t reply immediately, leading the brunette to believe that she is still a little upset with her.

**_Skai Prisa: (11:15 p.m.) I totally understand Lexa. I am not mad at you about anything. I just thought that you didn’t want to be friends with me anymore. I was really sad. I am really happy to know that I was wrong. Sorry about taking so long to reply. I am at work right now, and it is really busy. If I don’t answer, just know that it is not because of you._ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (11:15 p.m.) There is no way that I wouldn’t want to be friends with you Clarke. You are an amazing woman. Go to work. I don’t want you to get in trouble because of me. I will text you tomorrow._ **

**_Skai Prisa: (11:20 p.m.) : D Awwww! You sure know how to make a girl feel good about herself, Lex. I guess that I will go do what I am paid to do. Have a good night, Lexa. I will talk to you later._ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (11:20 p.m.) Good night Clarke._ **

Lexa goes to bed that night with a huge smile on her face. Thoughts of the blonde assault Lexa’s mind, even in her sleep.

Lexa keeps her promise, texting Clarke at around noon the next day. The text message is a simple ‘Good Morning,” the brunette hoping that she doesn’t wake the blonde from her slumber. Lexa can’t fight the huge smile that overtakes her face when Clarke replies soon after.

**_Skai Prisa: (12:05 p.m.) Good morning to you Lexa. Or I guess good afternoon would be the more appropriate response. Did you sleep well?_ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:06 p.m.) I slept wonderfully. I had good company last night before bed so sleep came easily._ **

Lexa’s brow furrows as she rereads the message. The context of having company for bed could possibly be misconstrued by the blonde. She releases a sigh of relief when her phone notification pings after minutes.

**_Skai Prisa: (12:15 p.m.) Sorry. My mom just called. So you had company last night? ;) Get ‘em tiger!_ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:15 p.m.) Not like that, silly. I was talking about you. :D_ **

**_Skai Prisa: (12:16 p.m.) Oh…I wasn’t aware that I was your ‘good company’ for the night. ;)_ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:16 p.m.) Oh believe me Clarke, you would remember it if I kept you company for the night._ **

**_Skai Prisa: (12:17 p.m.) My, my, my, Lexa ‘I don’t know your last name’ are you flirting with me?_ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:17 p.m.) It’s Woods. My last name is Woods._ **

**_Skai Prisa: (12:18 p.m.) Well Miss Woods, you are a flirt._ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:18 p.m.) *shrugs* Some people are just easy to flirt with._ **

**_Skai Prisa: (12:19 p.m.) Oh so now I’m easy?_ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:19 p.m.) Shit…no, no, no. Clarke, I didn’t mean that at all._ **

**_Skai Prisa: (12:20 p.m.) Chill Lex. I’m totally fucking with you._ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty (12:20 p.m.)  You are evil, Klark Kom Skaikru._ **

**_Skai Prisa: (12:21 p.m.) You love it. ;)_ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:21 p.m.) Maybe I do. Hey. I have class right now. I will text you later._ **

**_Skai Prisa: (12:22 p.m.) Go! Educate yourself, young scholar._ **

**_Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:22 p.m.) Shut up._ **

**_Skai Prisa: (12:23 p.m.) Pay attention Miss Woods._ **

Lexa laughs out loud before putting her phone away. Her class passes by without incident, her attention focused on a certain blonde.

The second week goes by in pretty much the same way. The girls never get a chance to meet up, mostly due to Lexa’s avoidance of the blonde. Lexa knows that she isn’t ready to face Clarke. She thought that had her unruly attraction towards the other girl under control. The cutesy text messages that Clarke had a tendency to send to Lexa were proving the brunette’s willpower to be very weak.

By the end of the second week of having Clarke’s phone number, Lexa knew that she had to distance herself even more from the blonde.

 She didn’t want to stop talking to her completely, so she opted to answer her text messages with one word answers or emoji’s, hoping that the blonde would eventually give up on her. Clarke was proving to be a very persistent if not aggressive friend, texting the brunette non-stop. Lexa spent the next two weeks barely responding to the sunny text messages from Clarke.

Her two weeks of minimal communication with the blonde proved to be very productive. Lexa was able to learn three songs from start to finish on her guitar. Lexa was crazy excited about her new found talent with the guitar. It definitely helped with her on-going attraction to Clarke. She just hoped that she would be able to stand strong when she inevitably saw the other girl again.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke was in a sour mood. She hasn’t seen Lexa in the past two weeks. She kept sending goofy text messages to the brunette throughout the day, but Lexa’s responses were minimal at best. Lexa was still avoiding the café during Clarke’s shifts, getting her caffeine fix from Octavia or Indra. Clarke was pretty salty about the obvious avoidance from her newfound ‘friend.’

Not seeing the brunette coupled with her best friend’s newly blossomed relationship has the normally cheery blonde a jealous mess.

Raven and Anya have been completely inseparable since their night together, frequently leaving Clarke as the third wheel.

To avoid the constant state of jealousy, Clarke threw herself into work and school. When she wasn’t in class, she was busy serving coffee or alcohol.

Raven shows up at Arkadia with Lincoln and Octavia in tow an hour into Clarke’s shift. The bar is extremely busy, leaving the blonde unable to pay much attention to her friends. Raven is stuck as third wheel while Octavia and Lincoln try to suck each other’s souls out through their mouths. Choking back a gag, the brunette makes her way up to the bar. It takes her a few minutes to snag Clarke’s attention, the blonde making her way over as soon as she notices her friend.

_“What’s up, buttercup?”_

_“Dude. I need alcohol and lots of it. Linctavia is doing their soul sucking thing again.”_

_“Ugh, gross. Where’s your girlfriend?”_ Clarke questions her friend, pouring her a double shot of tequila.

 _“She’s not my girlfriend Griffin.”_ Raven tosses back the shot, slamming the glass back onto the countertop. _“She’s on her way. Lexa got out of work late so they should be here any minute.”_

Clarke’s eyes widen as she pours her friend another shot, the thought of seeing Lexa making her heart race. _“Lexa is coming?”_

 _“Um yeah. Anya had a really bad week at work, so she wants to unwind. Lexa has this weird thing about not drinking, but she has to be with Anya if Anya wants to drink. I dunno. Anyway.”_ Raven slams back her second double shot, hissing at the burn of the alcohol. _“Hit me up one more time bartender. I need one more double and probably an old fashioned.”_

 _“What are you, eighty?”_ Clarke teases as she mixes her friend’s drink. Sliding the old fashioned over, she grabs the bottle of tequila, pouring another shot. _“You need to slow down Reyes, or else you’re going to be hammered before Anya gets here.”_

_“Meh. It makes dealing with Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dumb bearable. Thanks for the drinks, babe.”_

_“I’m putting them on your tab, Raven!”_ Clarke yells, chuckling at the half-hearted wave the brunette gives her.

Bartending was something that Clarke never saw herself doing. After she starting working at Grounder’s she fell in love with mixing drinks and the fast paced environment. So when her friend Monty asked her to come help bartend, she really couldn’t say no.

Plus, being a female bartender really had its perks. Clarke would just put on a low cut top and denim shorts or skinny jeans and she would quite a killing in tips. This was a pretty awesome deal, because art supplies are not a cheap endeavor.

So even though being a bartender was never in Clarke’s life plan, neither was working in a café. All in all, the blonde couldn’t complain about either job. She was in a good place in life, good job, great friends; she was doing well in school. If only she could find a girlfriend or a boyfriend to cure the immense loneliness that was over taking her entire being. Really there was only one person that the blonde wanted. A certain sarcastic brunette with a killer bod, and mesmerizing green eyes that she couldn’t stop thinking about.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa didn’t really want to come out to the bar tonight. Not being much of a drinker, she was often volunteered to be the designated driver. Being completely sober in a room full of drunks was not something that Lexa particularly enjoyed.

The thought of Anya going out to a bar alone make Lexa’s heart constrict. Ever since Costia had died, Lexa had a fear of her best friend getting drunk and dying in a car accident. So on the rare occasion that Anya wanted to go out, Lexa would tag along.

Walking into Arkcadia, Lexa felt a very fraternity house vibe. The bar was definitely seventy five percent men, well ‘boys’ really. The air felt sticky, a stagnant mixture of liquor and sweat permeating throughout the bar.

Anya asks Lexa to get her a long island before making her way over to the table where Raven, Octavia and who Lexa assumes is Lincoln are sitting. Lexa rolls her eyes at her best friend before making her way over to the bar. The bartender is currently bent over behind the bar, changing out a keg underneath the counter. Lexa watches the girl as she works, not so subtly checking out the other girl’s ass. The curves beneath the girl’s tight jeans make the brunette’s mouth go dry. Lexa wants nothing more than to run her hands up the girl’s thighs, and dig her fingernails into the sensitive flesh of her hips. Lexa’s slight arousal is completely broken when the girl stands back up. The brunette’s mouth drops open as Clarke’s bright blue eyes meet her shocked gaze.

_“Hey stranger! Fancy seeing you here.”_

_“Hey Clarke. I didn’t know that you worked here.”_

_“Yeah. This is my night job. My friend owns the place.”_

_“That’s pretty awesome.”_

_“It pays the bills. So what are you doing here? I’ve been trying to get you to hang out with me for the past few weeks and you’ve been too busy”_

_“I didn’t originally plan on coming out. Anya wanted to hang out with Raven and she tends to get really drunk. So I came to make sure that she gets home alright.”_

_“What can I get for you tonight, Lexa?”_

_“Um. Can I get a long island and just a cranberry juice?”_

_“Sure thing.”_

Clarke pulls down two glasses, expertly preparing the two drinks simultaneously. Clarke slides the drinks down towards Lexa before wiping the counter down. Lexa pulls out her wallet, prepared to give the blonde her debit card. Clarke waves her off with a small smile.

_“Don’t worry about it Lexa. Drinks are on the house.”_

_“Oh you don’t have to do that Clarke.”_

_“I know. I wanted to.”_

_“Thank you.”_

_“Don’t worry about it. It’s what friends do. Even if their friends avoid pretty much all contact with them.”_

Lexa sighs, fingers dragging through her brunette locks. _“Clarke I’m sorry. I’ve just been really busy.”_

_“It’s funny. You just said that to me yesterday when I asked if you wanted to meet me at the park. Yet here you are at a bar. I’m just a little bit sad that you have time to hang out with my friends, but not with me.”_

Clarke turns away without another word, making her way over to the other side of the bar to check on patrons. Lexa stands cemented in place, shock marring her features. When Clarke doesn’t immediately return, Lexa makes her way over to the table. She passes the long island to Anya, who is completely immersed in all things Raven at the moment.

By the end of her third cranberry juice, Lexa is pondering suicide using the cardboard coaster that her empty glass is resting on. Octavia and her boyfriend have migrated to the dancefloor, currently engaging in a game of heavy petting and grinding on each other’s bodies. Anya and Raven are no better, attached by the lips as if that were their only chance at survival. Groaning inwardly, the brunette leaves the table, intent on heading back over to the bar. She stops in her tracks when she notices the girl at the counter stealing Clarke’s attention.

The girl has light brown hair and she is clad in tight dark wash jeans and a red tank top. She is leaning slightly over the bar top, her index finger curling around a lock of Clarke’s hair. Clarke has a goofy grin plastered on her face; eyes alight in mirth as she laughs at something the girl says to her.

Lexa feels her throat tighten, a feeling washing over her that she hasn’t felt in a long time, jealousy. Lexa wants to be the one to twirl Clarke’s hair in-between her fingers, the soft strands tickling her skin. She wants to be the one to make the blonde’s eyes light up with laughter.

Lexa feels the sudden desire to interrupt the two, her envy getting the best of her. So, the brunette confidently makes her way back up to the counter, sitting down on a stool next to her new nemesis. It takes two whole minutes and Lexa clearing her throat three times before Clarke’s attention is swayed. She pulls away from the other girl, blues eyes locking in on Lexa.

 _“Hey Lexa.”_ The blonde smiles, a red blush dusting her cheeks.

 _“Clarke.”_ Lexa gives the blond a curt nod, a tight smile on her lips.

_“Are you having fun?”_

_“Hardly. I don’t find enjoyment in being the fifth wheel.”_

Clarke laughs softly, tucking a stray hair behind her ear. _“I know how you feel. I have been going through this for weeks.”_

_“Well. It’s bad.”_

_“Oh believe me, I know.”_

_“Who is your friend?”_

_“Oh.”_ Clarke looks over at the other girl. _“Lexa, this is Niylah. Niylah, this is my friend Lexa.”_

The two girls trade obviously false pleasantries, their eyes locking in some sort of territorial battle.

_“I didn’t mean to interrupt you two. I was just coming to ask if I could get another cranberry juice.”_

_“Yeah, of course.”_ Clarke scoops some ice into a whisky glass, filling it with the rich red beverage. She slides the drink over to Lexa with a grin. _“One vodka cran, hold the vodka.”_

_“Thank you Clarke.”_

_“My pleasure, Lexa.”_ The blonde gets called to the other side of the bar. She excuses herself with a grin.

 _“Why are you at a bar if you aren’t drinking?”_ Niylah questions, her words laced with sarcasm.

_“Not that it’s any of your business, Niylah, but I don’t drink. I’m just here hanging out with Clarke and I’s friends.”_

_“That’s cute. So now that you have your drink, you can go back to your friends.”_ Niylah sneers at Lexa, a scowl etched across her face.

 _“You know what?”_ Lexa words die in her throat as Clarke makes her way back over to the girls.

_“What’d I miss?”_

_“Nothing.”_ Both girls blurt out, breaking their stare down to look over at Clarke.

_“So…thanks for the drink Clarke. I’ll see you later.”_

_“Bye Lex!”_

Lexa makes her way back over to the table, her head hanging in defeat. Sitting down in the booth, Lexa takes a swing of the juice, wishing that the tart drink was mixed with vodka. The sudden appearance of the brunette causes Raven and Anya to break their seemingly endless lip lock.

_“Heda? Eting kei?” **(Commander? Everything okay?)**_

_“No.”_

_“Chit kom au?” **(What happened?)**_

_“English please. Assholes.”_ Raven scoffs, rolling her eyes at the pair.

 _“What happened, Lexa?”_ Anya questions the brunette, taking a sip of her third long island of the night.

_“Look over at the bar and see for yourself.”_

Anya and Raven look over at the bar, eyes widening as the take in the scene before them. Niylah is still leaning over the bar, talking animatedly to the blonde. Clarke is leaning against the bar, face resting in her hand as she smiles at the other girl.

 _“Damn! Who is that girl?”_ Raven questions, nudging Anya to get her attention. They both look over at Lexa with matching grins. Lexa is all but green with envy, a deep frown set in on her face.

 _“That is Niylah.”_ Lexa says, saying the girl’s name like it leaves a bad taste in her mouth.

_“She’s hot.”_

_“Hell yeah she is.”_

_“She’s okay I guess. Kind of bitchy if you ask me.”_

_“Are you jealous, Lex?”_

Lexa scoffs at her best friend. _“No. She is bitchy.”_

_“Mmmhmmm. I think that you are jealous.”_

_“I’m most definitely not. She was totally rude to me.”_

_“I’m sure that she was.”_

_“Excuse me?”_

_“Because…”_ Anya begins, stopping when Raven places a hand on her arm.

 _“Look, Lexa.”_ Raven starts, folding her arms across her chest. _“Obviously you gave her a reason to be rude to you.”_

_“What does that mean?”_

_“Well…you tend to be kind of prickly sometimes.”_

_“I’m sure that I don’t know what you mean.”_

_“You don’t? How do you not? I accidently ran into you when Clarke and were jogging and you almost ripped me a new asshole.”_

Lexa laughs sarcastically. _“You weren’t all rainbows and sunshine, Raven.”_

Anya puts her hands on both girls’ shoulders. _“Girls. Can we calm down? Your introduction, while hilarious, is not necessary to this conversation.”_ Anya turns her attention to her best friend. _“Lexa. If that girl was rude, I am sure it is because she sees you as competition.”_

_“Competition? For what?”_

_“Are you fucking serious right now?”_ Raven yells, throwing her hands up in exasperation. _“You have a very obvious lady boner for Clarke.”_

_“What? No I don’t. Clarke and I are just friends.”_

_“Cut the bullshit, Lexa. Even a blind man could see the heart eyes that you have for my best friend.”_

_“No…”_

_“Still don’t believe you.”_

_“Whatever. We are just friends.”_

_“Okay. Whatever you say Lexa. I’m going to go scope out the new girl.”_ Raven pecks Anya’s lips before leaving the table.

Anya waits until Raven is out of earshot before turning her attention to her best friend.

_“You and Raven need to learn how to chill.”_

_“She started it!”_

_“Doesn’t matter Lexa. I really like her, please don’t fuck this up for me by being a dick.”_

_“She needs to calm down too Anya. It’s not just me.”_

_“I know. I’ll talk to her.”_

_“So you really like her?”_

_“Oh my god yes. She is amazing. But that isn’t what we are here to talk about. What is going on with you and Clarke?”_

Lexa groans, burying her face into her hands. _“Nothing is going on. We are just friends, Anya.”_

_“Ron ai ridiyo op, Leksa.” **(Speak true, Lexa.)**_

_“I have told you already. It doesn’t matter. I can’t be with her. I just can’t.”_

_“Lexa, look at me.”_ Lexa lifts her head to meet Anya’s concerned gaze. _“Why won’t you try again?”_

_“I’m broken, Onya. Hodnes laik kwelnes. I can’t have my heart broken again. I won’t make it this time.” **(Love is weakness.)**_

_“Leska. Hodnes laik uf. Nou kwelnes.” **(Lexa. Love is strength. Not weakness.)**_

_“No. I just can’t do it. I won’t.”_

_“I told you that I won’t push you, Lexa. But I want you to know that you are making a huge mistake. In the short amount of time that I have been around these girls, I have gotten to know Clarke. She is an amazing woman. I just really wish that you would give her a chance. She’s crazy about you. Even if you have been kind of a dick over the last couple of weeks.”_

_“I just can’t be around her. It’s hard enough for me to text her. Seeing her breaks the tiny bit of resolve_ _that I have. For God sakes Anya, I can’t even be around her without wanting to kiss her senseless.”_

_“So really what I am hearing is. You do have feelings for her; you just don’t want to give her a shot.”_

_“It isn’t that simple.”_

_“It really is.”_

_“I want to give her a shot, Anya. I really do. I just can’t. Even thinking about being in a relationship with somebody else makes me want to pass out.”_

_“But how long do you think this ‘just friends’ façade is going to last?”_

Lexa groans, rubbing her newly calloused hands over her face. _“I don’t know, Anya. Until she gets tired of me, I guess.”_

_“That will never happen. Clarke is a good person. Even if you are giving her some bullshit, half-assed friendship, she will take whatever you will give her. I know that she has feelings for you, but she will bury them as long as she knows that she will have you as a friend.”_

_“Well. I won’t ever be able to give her what she needs.”_

_“You are so fucking stubborn.”_ Anya growls, running her fingers through her hair aggressively. _“You’re giving me a fucking tumor with your bullheadedness. All I’m saying Lexa, is that you are missing out on an amazing woman. That girl over there is going to scoop Clarke up. And I won’t feel sorry for you when she does.”_

_“That’s real nice.”_

_“Well? What do you want me to say? I am your best friend, but that girl is everything that is good in the world. And I can’t sit by and watch you tear her down because you don’t want to take a chance on her.”_

_“I’m going to the restroom.”_

Lexa gets up from her spot, walking towards the restroom. Anya’s eyes follow her best friend’s retreating figure, an exasperated sigh leaving her lips.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke can’t remember the last time that somebody put so much effort into flirting with her. She is completely enamored by the brunette on the other side of the bar counter. Between the cheesy pick up lines and the downcast, flirty glances, Clarke is sure that her face is a permanent shade of red. She absolutely loves it.

Her dating life has been pretty much non-existent since her disastrous ‘relationship’ with Finn. She has had a few casual hook-ups, but she hasn’t had the desire to attempt dating again. Until Lexa came into her life, that is. Being around Lexa has made Clarke feel more alive than she has ever felt. Unfortunately for Clarke, the brunette has made it perfectly clear that she desires nothing but friendship from the blonde. Clarke has finally accepted that she will be the best friend possible, while quietly pining for Lexa. Now in the blink of an eye, this other brunette is showing monumental interest in her.

Niylah is gorgeous, and her flirting game is on point. A small part of Clarke can’t help but wish that Lexa was the one twirling her hair and spouting cheesy pick-up lines. Since it’s clear that the brunette isn’t going to be that girl, Clarke will take what she can get. She wants to get over her unrequited crush on the brunette, she just doesn’t know how. Right now, with Niylah bending over the bar counter, Clarke feels like it might happen.

Clarke is midway through her appreciation of Niylah’s chest when Raven clambers over to the bar. Raven takes in the sight of Clarke openly ogling the other girl, a shit eating grin plastered on her face.

_“Hey Princess. Who’s the hottie?”_

_“Uh. Hey Raven. Niylah this is my best friend Raven. Raven, this is Niylah.”_

_“Nice to meet you Raven.”_ Niylah holds her hand out towards the other brunette.

 _“Likewise, Niylah.”_ Raven grasps her hand. _“You’re pretty hot.”_

_“Um, thank you?”_

_“No. Thank you. Clarke. I need some alcohol.”_

_“Are you sure Raven? You’ve had quite a bit of tequila tonight.”_

_“I’m sure. I definitely didn’t come over her just to check out the new girl here.”_

_“Are all your friends going to check on me tonight, Clarke?”_

_“What? No…Oh my god, Niylah….I totally didn’t know that they were going to come over here.”_

_“Chill guys. I just need some alcohol inside of me.”_

Clarke rolls her eyes at her friend, pouring her a double shot of tequila. Raven downs the alcohol quickly, grimacing at the burn. She slams the glass down on the counter and drops into one of the stools.

_“Fuck! Hit me again.”_

_“Last shot. You have had enough alcohol tonight.”_

_“You’re not my mom, hooker. Give me liquor.”_

_“Hey guys.”_

Clarke barely manages to suppress a groan as Octavia saunters up to the bar, panting slightly. She has a light sheen of sweat adorning her body.

_“Hey O. Clarke was just introducing me to her new lady friend.”_

_“Niylah, this is my other best friend, Octavia.”_

_“Hey.”_

_“Sup?”_ Octavia eyes the other girl warily, arms crossing over her chest. _“Clarke, I need a margarita.”_ Octavia takes a seat on one of the bar stools as the blonde starts making her friend’s drink. _“So, Niylah. Tell us a little bit about yourself.”_

_“Yes, please do.”_

_“What is this? The Spanish Inquisition?”_

_“We’re just trying to get to know you, is all.”_

_“Sure you are.”_

_“Come on Niylah. If it will make you feel better, I’ll start. My name is Raven Reyes.  I am twenty two years old. I grew up in San Antonio, Texas. Hmmm..I am majoring in mechanical engineering. I am an only child. Oh! When I was eighteen, I got into a car accident. I was pinned underneath the steering wheel. A piece of the driver’s side door got lodged into my spine. So long story short, I pretty much can’t feel my left leg at all. It sucks. So that’s me. Your turn O.”_

_“I’m Octavia Blake. I am twenty one years old and I grew up in San Diego, California. I am majoring in sports medicine. I have an older brother, Bellamy. He is in the Marine Corps. I have been friends with Clarke since we were in diapers, and I know how to kill a person in at least five different ways.”_

_“Jeez, you guys. Leave the poor girl alone.”_ Clarke hands Octavia the margarita, turning to face Niylah with a smile. _“Please don’t let them scare you away, they are mostly harmless.”_

Niylah pats Clarke’s hand reassuringly which causes the blonde to blush furiously.

_“Don’t worry about it. I am Niylah Harmon. I am twenty four years old and I am from Seattle, Washington. I am in my final year of law school. I have one brother, John. He is nineteen years old. He goes to school here too. He is here on a baseball scholarship. Is that sufficient enough information to sate your curiosity?”_

_“Ohh Clarkey. I like this one. Lock it down!”_ Raven all but shouts. _“Where the fuck is my shot?”_

_“If I pour you this shot, you have to leave.”_

_“But I didn’t even get the other shot that you promised me.”_

_“Fine. I will kick your ass if you puke in the bar. Or if you puke in the dorm room.”_ Clarke pulls out another glass, filling the two glasses with tequila. _“Now leave us alone.”_

 _“Aye, aye Captain.” Raven_ tosses the shots back simultaneously, hissing as she swallows them down. _“Let us leave these two lovely ladies alone, O-face.”_

_“Alright, but heed my words Niylah. Don’t fuck with my friend’s heart.”_

The two girls walk away from the bar, making their way back over to the able. Lincoln is sitting at the table with Anya, both of them talking animatedly about mixed martial arts. Octavia snuggles into the booth with Lincoln, pecking his cheek as he puts his arm around her shoulders. Raven scoots in next to Anya, snuggling in closely to the other girl.

_“Welcome back to the party ladies.”_

_“We were gone for like five minutes.”_

_“So?”_ Anya questions as she places a kiss on Raven’s cheek.

_“I love her.”_

_“So you think that the plan will work?”_

_“Wait, what plan?”_ Octavia asks with her cup inches from her lips.

_“Oh. See. We have a plan. I call it ‘Pull Lexa’s head out of her own ass.’ Basically we are going to make Lexa lose her fucking mind with jealousy. Since she won’t admit that she has a lady boner for our Princess. We are going to help her figure her shit out.”_

_“That’s awful. That poor girl.”_

Raven scoffs at Octavia. _“Lexa and Clarke belong together. They are like soulmates dude.”_

_“Ugh. I hate it when you’re right.”_

_“I’m always right babe.”_

_“Right about what?”_

_“Um, nothing. We were just talking about UFC.”_

_“Oh. Okay.”_ Lexa slides into the booth next to Octavia. _“What did I miss?”_

_“Nothing. We’ve just been chilling. Relaxing. Chillaxing.”_

_“Are you drunk Raven?”_

Raven pinches her thumb and index finger close together. _“Like this many.”_

_“Oh yeah, you’re drunk.”_

_“Shut up, Commander.”_

_“Okay Raven. Let’s go dance.”_ Anya grabs Raven’s hand, pulling her out of the booth to the dance floor. Lincoln and Octavia follow soon after, leaving Lexa alone at the table.

Lexa sips at the watered down cranberry juice in her cup, trying to fight the urge to glance over a Clarke. She tries to distract herself, pulling out her phone. She doesn’t have any text messages, obviously, because the only two people that text her are at the bar. She opens her facebook app, scrolling through her newsfeed. This distracts her for two minutes before she grows bored. Glancing up from the device, she audibly sighs as her eyes drift towards Clarke.

Clarke’s attention is solely focused on Niylah; her eyes are alight with mirth. The blonde has a hand resting on Niylah’s forearm, her body angled towards the other girl. Lexa continues staring at the two girls, envy bubbling in her stomach.

She’s not sure how long she sits at the table staring at the train wreck in front of her, but soon enough, Clarke is yelling out last call around the bar. She breaks away from her flirt fest with the brunette, making a few last call drinks.

It’s about another thirty minutes when the staff kicks everybody out. The group stumbles outside, deciding to wait for Clarke to get done closing down.

Raven stumbles alongside Anya, her limp more pronounced in her state of drunkenness. She grimaces with each step, her right hand rubbing near constant circles on her knee.

_“Hey An?”_

_“Yes, Raven?”_

_“I need a favor.”_

_“What’s up buttercup?”_

_“Will you carry me?”_ Her bottom lip juts out into a pout. _“My knee hurts.”_

_“Oh my god, are you really pouting?”_

_“Maybe.”_

_“That is a low blow, Miss Reyes.”_

_“Please.”_

_“Fine. Hop on.”_

Anya kneels down slightly, Raven climbing onto the woman’s back.

_“My, my, my. Somebody is pussy whipped.”_

_“Fuck off Woods. At least some of us are getting some.”_

_“Low blow, Joka.” **(Fucker.)**_

_“I love you too, Heda.”_

Another twenty minutes pass by before the bar staff makes their way out of the bar, locking the door behind them. Clarke makes her way over to her friends, her head buried in her phone. Her eyes lock on Raven being piggybacked by Anya first.

 _“Oh. You fell for her puppy dog eyes and pouting lip, didn’t you?”_ Clarke says with a laugh.

_“Yeah. I can’t help it. She sexes me up.”_

_“Gross.”_

Raven looks over at Clarke, a drunken grin plastered on her face. _“It’s true though.”_

 _“That’s nice.”_ Clarke looks down at her phone, typing something before looking back up.

_“What’s got your attention over there Princess?”_

_“Oh.”_ Clarke curses inwardly as her face heats up in a blush. _“It’s nothin’”_

_“Nothing, my ass. All of your friends are here, who’re you texting?”_

_“Just Niylah.”_

_“You guys already exchanged phone numbers?”_

_“Yeah. She asked me out.”_

_“Oh really?”_

Lexa’s attention snaps towards Clarke, dread filling her body, making it hard to breathe.

_“Yeah.”_

_“Well? Did you say yes?”_

_“I did.”_

_“Whoop!!!”_ Octavia drunkenly yells, raising her fist in the air. _“About time Griffin!”_

_“I’m with O. You haven’t dated anybody since Finn.”_

_“I have too.”_

_“No Princess. Hooking up with people doesn’t count as a date.”_

_“Well, whatever. We’re in college.”_

_“So. When are you going out?”_

_“Tomorrow night.”_

“Nice!” Raven hollers. _“That girl works fast. She knows when to not waste an opportunity.”_

 _“Are you excited?”_ Octavia asks, glancing over at Lexa. She almost feels bad when she sees the girl’s crestfallen expression. Almost.

_“Yeah. I’m pretty nervous.”_

_“You’ll be fine.”_

_“Anya, we need to go. I have to work in the morning.”_ Lexa’s voice cuts sharply into the night air.

_“Okay. Are you coming Rae?”_

Raven chuckles, leaning in to nip at Anya’s earlobe. “Not yet, but hopefully soon.”

Anya groans softly, eliciting another chuckle from Raven. _“You’re evil.”_

_“And you’re sexy. Take me home.”_

_“Anya! Let’s go!”_

_“Jeez…Chil au. **(Chill out.)**_

_“Goodnight guys.”_ Clarke calls out, still engrossed in her phone. She says goodbye to Octavia and Lincoln before making her way to her car.

As soon as the blonde is out of earshot, Octavia turns to face her boyfriend.

_“How long do you think it’s going to take before Lexa cracks?”_

_“Not long, by the looks of it.”_

_“That girl doesn’t know what is about to hit her.”_

The couple laughs as they make their way over to Lincoln’s motorcycle.

 

**TBC**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you thought! Thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -Clarke goes on a date.  
> -Lexa maybe gets drunk.  
> -Much flirting ensues.  
> -Fine Stud Lexa is definitely mentioned.  
> -Ranya gets caught in the act.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hello my lovely readers. Here is my next update for you beautiful people. This chapter did not want to end. I honestly could’ve drug it on longer than I did, but I felt like it ended in a good place. I know that some of you might not be happy with Niylah being in the picture right now, but I assure you that Clexa is endgame. I have wanted to write a slow burn fic for a while. Unfortunately, this fic is my guinea pig for my slow burn game. I hope that you guys enjoy this update, and know that we are getting there. Thank you for all of your favs/kudos/reviews. I appreciate each and every one of them. It gives me the tingles to know that you guys are enjoying this story, even if I am dragging out the Clexa slow burn. Anyway, let me stop ranting now. I hope that you guys enjoy my update, please let me know what you thought.
> 
> READ ON AWESOME NERDS!!!

**-Barista’s Choice-**

**~Chapter 4~ ‘Date Night’**

 

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa hates this feeling in the pit of her stomach. She knows that it’s jealousy even though this is not a well-known emotion for her. Her only serious relationship was with Costia and Lexa never once felt the strong sense of jealousy that she is experiencing now. She can’t sit still and she definitely can’t sleep. Raven and Ayna’s extracurricular activities ended almost an hour ago, both passing out from exhaustion probably. Lexa is pretty sure that it is almost five o’clock in the morning, but she is unable to turn her brain off in order to attempt sleeping. Every time she closes her eyes she sees Niylah flirting with Clarke, kissing Clarke, being intimate with Clarke. Niylah will get to touch Clarke in ways that Lexa will only ever get to dream of.

The jealousy shifts into something resembling anger. The anger is mostly directed at herself, all because she is to blame for this unwelcome turn of events. Clarke has been open with her feelings towards the brunette and Lexa had done nothing but shut her down. Lexa ‘friendzoned’ Clarke without a second thought because she’s been too obsessed with her own fear at being hurt again to give the blonde a chance. So really, she doesn’t have a right to be upset or jealous of Niylah. Too bad her brain and heart can’t agree in this situation.

By five o’clock she has given up on trying to get any sleep, knowing that it would do her more harm than good right now. She has a class at nine o’clock in the morning so taking a nap would just piss her off when she has to get up. She didn’t plan on going for a run today, but she has do something to help compartmentalize her current feelings. She knows that jogging will help take her mind off of the blonde, at least for a little while. She’ll figure the rest out later.

By the end of the third mile of her run, she has managed nothing more than to work up a sweat. Her mind is still a jumbled mess of jealousy and anger. Her muscles are fatigued from the strain of the run and the lack of sleep. Her head is starting to pound, craving the caffeine that she has continuously consumed for the majority of her college career. She doesn’t want to risk running into Clarke but she knows that she will be a raging bitch if she doesn’t caffeinate her body.

The familiar bell jingles announces her arrival at Grounder’s, the few early morning patrons too zoned out to pay her any attention. The blonde behind the counter, however, immediately meets her eyes. The bright smile that graces Clarke’s face is immediately mirrored by the brunette.

 _“Good morning, sunshine.”_   Clarke’s raspy morning voice sends shivers down Lexa’s spine.

_“Good morning, Clarke. I am surprised that you are here this morning.”_

_“Why’s that?”_

_“Because I saw you like four hours ago.”_

_“Oh yeah. I don’t get much sleep. Between the two jobs and classes.”_ The blonde shrugs, handing Lexa her drink. _“You get used to it.”_

 _“Thanks.”_ Lexa takes a drink of the piping hot beverage, sighing as the sweet flavor hits her tongue. Drinking the same coffee every day over the past four years has left Lexa a self-proclaimed expert on the beverage. There are slight differences in the taste depending on which barista makes it, but overall it’s usually the same. This caramel macchiato has a different tang to it that Lexa can’t quite put her finger on. It’s good, very good actually, but it’s different. _“What is this?”_

_“It’s your usual, with a twist.”_

_“A twist?”_

_“Yeah. I have been thinking about messing around with drink flavors for a while now and you are my first guinea pig.”_

_“Hmmm. I don’t think that I like that.”_

_“Oh, well. Give it back and I’ll make you another.”_

_“Oh! No! Not the drink Clarke. The drink is delicious. I was talking about being a guinea pig.”_

Clarke’s eyes narrow playfully. _“You did that on purpose, you jerk.”_

Lexa chuckles softly. _“I haven’t the faintest clue what you’re talking about.”_

 _“Sure you don’t. Excuse me for a second.”_ Clarke turns her attention away from the brunette, taking another patron’s order. She expects Lexa to be gone by the time she finishes, as she usually doesn’t linger long in the café. The blonde is surprised to find Lexa rooted in place, sipping her drink. _“You’re still here.”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“I’m surprised.”_

_“Why’s that?”_

_“Usually you have to take off as soon as you get your drink. I just figured that you were busy.”_

_“Well, normally I stop here halfway through my run. I have class at nine, so I usually end up heading home from my run at seven.”_

_“Oh. I see. What about today?”_

_“Oh. Well I didn’t originally plan on going for a run this morning, but I couldn’t sleep. So I don’t have to rush home just yet. We haven’t really been able to see each other lately, so I thought that I would hang around.”_

_“Awesome. One of the other baristas should be here soon if you have time to get something to eat. We can eat something here or we can go to the diner across the street. I mean, if you want to.”_

Lexa knows that she should stand her ground and say no, being so close to the blonde is not going to help her get rid of this crush. Her mind flashes to her thoughts from this morning, unwelcome reminders of what she can’t have. Yet here Clarke is, offering her friendship when Lexa has treated her so poorly. And right now, Lexa will take whatever she can get from the blonde.

_“I’d love to have breakfast. I’m not really dressed for it though.”_

Clarke looks up and down Lexa’s body, secretly checking her out while ‘looking at her attire.’ The brunette is clad in tight black yoga pants and a tight tank top. Lexa’s tank top has ridden up slightly, revealing what looks like a tattoo on the brunette’s hip. It looks tribal in design, but Clarke can’t really make out the details. She wants to run her hands over the brunette’s tattooed flesh. Really, she wants to pull the tank top off and see if Lexa has any other tattoos, but she doesn’t think that would be appropriate at work.

_“You look fine, Lex. I have a hoodie in the back that you can wear if you aren’t comfortable wearing that.”_

_“If you don’t mind.”_

_“Of course. Let me go grab it real quick.”_

Clarke disappears into what Lexa assumes is the stockroom. She comes back out holding a cardinal red Stanford University hoodie.

_“Here you go Lexa.”_

Clarke tosses the hoodie at Lexa with a grin. A girl with light brown hair walks behind the counter as Lexa pulls the hoodie over her head. The jacket smells like the blonde, mixed with her laundry detergent and Lexa can’t help but press the sleeves towards her nose as she inhales deeply. She pulls the soft fabric away from her face as Clarke walks up to her.

_“Thank you Clarke.”_

_“You’re welcome. Harper’s here if you’re ready to go.”_

_“I’m ready.”_

Clarke grabs Lexa’s hand in excitement, the brunette barely managing to suppress a groan as she feels an electric shock shoots up her arm from the contact. They make their way out of the café, heading quickly across the street. The diner is quiet this early in the morning, the few patrons inside are either on their way to work, eager to get a bite to eat before starting their day. Or their night hasn’t ended yet and they are filling themselves with sustenance after partying all night before crashing out. Making their way to an empty booth, the girls move to sit down, not realizing that their hands are still intertwined. Matching blushes adorn their cheeks as they reluctantly let go of each other’s hands before sitting down.

 _“So.”_ Lexa clears her throat, her cheeks still aflame with embarrassment. _“What’s good here?”_

_“I usually get chocolate banana pancakes with extra whipped cream.”_

_“Jesus Clarke. That sounds like it would give you diabetes.”_

_“It’s so good though.”_

_“I am not going to risk the clogging of my arteries, thank you very much. I will just have to take your word for it.”_

Clarke rolls her eyes, scoffing at the brunette. _“Sorry not all of us were blessed with perfect physiques. Some of us have to work out extra hard in order to eat the things that we enjoy and not get fat.”_

_“Oh please. Do you even own a mirror? Because from where I’m sitting, you have no need to work out at all.”_

_“Shut up.”_ The blush on Clarke’s cheeks reddens even further. She is unable to take the intense look that Lexa is giving her right now so she drops her gaze to her lap.

_“I’m just speaking the truth Clarke.”_

_“Hey Clarke!”_ The chipper voice breaks the game of eye contact that the girls have been locked in. Clarke’s gaze snaps up to meet the smiling face of the black haired waitress that has walked up to their table.

_“Hey Maya. How’s it goin’?”_

_“Not too shabby. How’ve you been?”_

_“I’ve been good. Busy but really good. I’ve haven’t seen you around the bar recently.”_

_“Yeah. I’ve been really busy with work and classes. Jas keeps trying to make me come to the bar, but I just haven’t been in the mood.”_

_“I totally get that. If I didn’t work there, I would spend that little bit of spare time in bed. But I get good tips. School definitely isn’t cheap.”_

Maya laughs. _“You’re telling me sister. Who is your friend?”_

_“This is my friend Lexa. Lexa this is Maya. One of the co-owners of the bar, Jasper, is her boyfriend.”_

_“Nice to meet you Maya.”_

_“You too Lexa. What can I get you today?”_

_“Um…can I get an omelet? With ham, cheese and mushrooms? And a water to drink please?”_

_“Sure. Clarke, usual?”_

_“Yup.”_

_“Awesome. I will go put that in for you guys and I’ll be right back with your drinks.”_

_“Thanks Maya.”_

Maya walks away from the table, leaving the two girls alone once again. The air is still slightly heavy with Lexa’s last comment on Clarke’s body. Clarke musters up the courage to look up from the super interesting coffee stain on the aged diner table, locking her gaze on the brunette’s deep green eyes.

_“So Lexa. Thanks for coming to have breakfast with me.”_

_“Thank you for inviting me, Clarke.”_ The way that Lexa’s voice curls around the ‘k’ in Clarke’s name makes goosebumps breakout across her skin.

_“I’m really glad that you’ve had time. I’ve missed seeing you.”_

_“Me too Clarke. I’m sorry that I have been so busy lately.”_

_“It’s okay. You’re in your last year of law school; I can’t imagine how stressful that must be.”_

_“It has its moments. It’s not usually so bad. My schedule isn’t as hectic now, so I won’t be unavailable all of the time.”_

_“Awesome! That means we can hang out more.”_

_“Yes it does.”_

_“So. The last time we hung out, we watched a movie.”_

Lexa immediately feels her face heat up as her mind recalls waking up cuddling with the blonde. _“Yeah?”_

_“What did you think of it?”_

_“I um…”_ Lexa’s hand moves up to the back of her neck, short nails scratching at the skin. _“I don’t really remember it, honestly.”_

_“Yeah. We did fall asleep pretty early into the movie. But haven’t you seen it before?”_

_“No.”_

_“But it’s a classic Tarantino film! How have you not seen it before?”_

_“I don’t really watch movies.”_

_“Not even when you were younger?”_

_“I read a lot when I was younger. I didn’t really have time for movies and when I did, I would choose to watch a documentary. I still watch them when I have time.”_

Clarke laughs, a slightly undignified snort escaping her mouth. _“Oh my god, you’re such a nerd!”_

 _“Shut up!”_ Lexa smacks Clarke’s arm playfully, eyes narrowed in mock anger. _“Documentaries are really good.”_

_“I’m sure.”_

_“At least I don’t have an obsession with crappy vampire movies that are completely based in a strip club.”_

_“From Dusk Till Dawn is not a crappy vampire movie. Wait.”_ Clarke’s eyes narrow in suspicion. _“How do you know what the movie is about if you fell asleep at the beginning?”_

Lexa suddenly finds her napkin really interesting, hands focused on tearing small pieces off of the rolled paper.

 _“I may have looked up the film on imdb when I got home from your dorm.”_ She mumbles quietly.

_“I’m sorry, what?”_

Lexa keeps her eyes on the table, refusing to meet Clarke’s gaze. _“I looked the movie up on imdb when I got home so that I knew what it was about.”_

_“Awww. Lexie that’s so cute. You could’ve just watched it.”_

_“No thanks.”_

_“Oh come on Lexa. Quentin Tarantino movies are fantastic. Pulp Fiction, Jackie Brown, Reservoir Dogs, Kill Bill, Inglorious Basterds…no?”_

_“I’m good.”_

_“How about we make a deal?”_

_“Okay.”_

_“If you watch at least one Tarantino movie of my choosing, I will watch whatever documentary you want.”_

_“Only if I get to choose the documentary.”_

_“Okay. But I get to pick the Tarantino movie.”_

_“Deal.”_

Maya brings out their breakfast, effectively ending their rant about movies. They eat quietly, enjoying the comfortable silence around them.

Lexa steals glances at the blonde, watching Clarke enjoy her food. She manages to keep her thoughts at a PG-13 level, until Clarke lets out a satisfied moan that shoots straight down to her core.

 _“Oh my god, Lexie, you have to have a bite of this.”_ Clarke says between bites, her words slightly muffled by the pancakes in her mouth.

_“No, thanks. I don’t need to put that sugar filled plate of carbohydrates into my mouth.”_

_“Awwww..please. It’s so good Lexie.”_ Clarke’s bottom lip juts out into a pout, her eyes begging. She holds out her fork towards Lexa’s mouth, a generous bite of pancake at the end of the utensil.

Lexa wants to deny the bite of the sugary treat, she really does. But the hopeful look in Clarke’s eyes breaks her resolve. She leans in towards the middle of the table, taking the fork into her mouth. The fluffy goodness is warm and sweet, but not sickeningly so. The bananas and chocolate chips inside are the perfect accompaniment to the buttermilk pancakes. She is unable to stop the moan from escaping her lips as she swallows the food, the sticky sweetness like heaven in her mouth.

Clarke’s eyes zero in on Lexa’s lips as the brunette licks the remnants of the syrup from the corner of her mouth. Lexa is pretty sure that Clarke’s blue eyes darken slightly as she licks at her lips.

_“You’re right Clarke; this sugary concoction of death is quite delicious.”_

_“Umhmmm…”_ Clarke’s eyes are still focused on Lexa’s mouth as her tongue darts out to lick her own lips. _“I’m sorry, what?”_

_“I said that you were right about the pancakes. They are pretty tasty.”_

_“Yeah you are...”_ Clarke stammers, cheeks reddening at her slip up _. “I mean they are.”_

 _“Um…”_ Lexa’s words die in her suddenly dry throat. She scoops up a bite of her omelet to avoid making an ass out of herself with some ridiculous comment.

The two girls finish their breakfast in silence, the slightly charged air around them making it difficult to breathe. Maya clears their plates when they are finished, leaving the check on the table.

 _“I’m paying.”_ Lexa says as she grabs the paper off of the table.

_“No way. I invited you out for breakfast.”_

_“And?”_

_“And date rules state that the planner of the date is also the one who pays.”_

_“Date rules??”_

_“Ummm..”_ Clarke’s eyes widen, her face reddening in embarrassment. _“Yeah. Well I mean that friend dates count under those rules too, don’t they?”_

_“Yeah. I guess you’re right. I’m still paying.”_

_“No Lexa. Let me pay.”_ Clarke reaches over the table, trying to grab the check from Lexa’s hand. Lexa smirks at the blonde before leaning out of her reach.

_“Seriously Clarke. You hardly ever let me pay for my drinks at the café. You didn’t let me pay for any of the drinks at the bar last night. Let me pay.”_

_“Fine.”_ Clarke pouts, crossing her arms over her chest. Lexa smiles, enamored by the blonde’s childish behavior.

 _“I’m glad that you see it my way.”_ Lexa pulls her debit card out of her workout top, placing it on top of the check.

After paying for the meal, the two women relax in the booth, catching up on their lives over the past couple of weeks. It’s familiar and comfortable and it causes a stab of pain to resonate through Lexa’s chest. She wishes more than anything that they could be like this all of the time, sharing breakfast and talking about everything and nothing. Making dinner together in their kitchen after class. Cuddling on the couch watching whatever stupid Tarantino movie Clarke wants to before bed.

Before Lexa knows it, her phone alarm starts buzzing, signaling that she has twenty minutes before she has to be in class. She has been sitting in the diner for an hour and forty minutes talking to Clarke. If she leaves now, she will make it back to campus just in time for class. She doesn’t have time to shower and change and she definitely doesn’t have time to grab her backpack.

_“Clarke, I am really sorry, but I have to leave. I have class in twenty minutes.”_

_“Oh shit! I can’t believe that we have been here for so long.”_

_“I know. Time flies when you’re having fun.”_

_“Totally. We should do this again sometime.”_

_“We will. Just text me.”_

_“Promise me you’ll answer?”_

_“I promise.”_

_“Okay good. Now get out of here before you’re late.”_

_“Okay. I’ll talk to you later.”_

_“Okay.”_

Lexa stands up from the booth, ready to bolt out of the diner. She whips around when she feels a hand on her shoulder. The brunette comes face to face with a slightly flustered Clarke. Before she has time to react, Clarke pulls her into a tight hug. Lexa sucks in a sharp breath at the close contact, her senses suddenly overwhelmed by the blonde’s scent.  

 _“Thank you for hanging out with me today, Lexa.”_ Clarke whispers in Lexa’s ear, her warm breath sending tingles down the brunette’s body.

 _“Thank you for inviting me out, Clarke.”_ Lexa croaks, her voice unsteadied by the blonde’s close proximity. _“I seriously have to go now.”_

 _“Oh, yeah! Of course.”_ Clarke reluctantly lets go of the embrace, her smile infectiously bright. _“Bye Lexie.”_

 _“Bye Clarke.”_ Lexa turns away from the blonde, sadness rising inside of her as she leaves the café.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa barely makes it to class on time. She is pretty sure that her omelet is going to make a second appearance. She makes a mental note to never sprint on a full stomach ever again.

Her usual spot near the front of the lecture hall is taken, so she has to make do with a seat near the back. She doesn’t pay much attention as she takes her seat, the professor already recapping the lecture from Wednesday. She turns to her neighbor to ask for some paper and a pen before the new lecture begins.

_“Excuse me; do you have a pen that I could borrow? And some paper? I forgot my things.”_

_“Sure.”_ The redheaded girl hands her a pen and a few sheets of paper. _“We can share my book too, Lexa.”_

_“Thank you, umm…I’m sorry. I am terrible with names.”_

The other girl laughs. _“It’s fine. My name is Monroe.”_

_“Thanks, Monroe.”_

_“Not a problem.”_

The two girls work in silence for the majority of the lecture period. With about twenty minutes left in class, the professor has to step out to take a phone call, so he tells them to read amongst themselves until he gets back. Lexa begins to shuffle through her notes, reading through her loopy scrawl.

_“I’m sad that you couldn’t come out with us last night, Monroe.”_

_“I know, I was busy studying. Not everybody can go out on a Thursday night and still function in class the next morning.”_

_“Well. You missed out.”_

_“Oh yeah?”_

_“God yes. I met the hottest girl at the bar.”_

_“Did you now?”_

_“Yeah. She was working at the bar of course, but I spent most of the night flirting with her.”_

_“What did she look like?”_

_“Blonde hair, the brightest blue eyes I have ever seen, awesome bod, and a killer rack. Oh and she has the sexiest husk to her voice. Like crazy hot.”_

_“She sounds like your type of girl.”_

_“Oh yeah, she totally is. Best part about it?”_

_“You got her number?”_

_“Better. We’re going out tonight.”_

_“Dude! You work fast Niylah.”_

Lexa’s head shoots up from her notes, eyes widened in surprise. She glances over at the two girls, sneakily listening in on their conversation.

_“What can I say? I don’t like to waste time. No but really, she’s a very sweet girl. We have a lot in common.”_

_“Well, I’m happy for you.”_

_“Thanks.”_

Lexa’s focus is broken for the rest of the lecture, her mind constantly drifting towards the blonde that she just spent the morning with. By the time the professor excuses them for the day, she has worked herself into such a jealous rage that she can’t see straight. She doesn’t notice Niylah standing in front of her at first as her mind is focused on Clarke.

_“Hello Lexa.”_

_“Hello, Nikki, right?”_

Niylah laughs sarcastically. _“Close. Niylah.”_

_“Right. I’m bad with names, sorry.”_

_“It’s fine.”_

_“So Nicole, I didn’t realize you were in this class.”_

_“I’m not. I take this course on Tuesday and Thursday. I missed class yesterday so I was making it up.”_

_“Hmm. That’s nice. I didn’t really take you for a law major.”_

_“No? What do you think my major would be?”_

_“Oh something in media arts or like a burlesque artist.”_

_“Did you just call me a stripper?”_

_“You said it, not me Naomi.”_

_“You know, Lexa, I didn’t really take you for the lawyer type either.”_

_“No?”_

_“No. I would’ve thought that you would be majoring in business. Or something equally bitchy and stick in your ass type.”_

_“I’m not sure what you mean, Nadia.”_

_“You have a bitchy presence.”_

_“You don’t even know me.”_

_“I know that you have a huge crush on Clarke.”_

_“I don’t really see how Clarke and I’s relationship is any of your business, Noel. You’re not her girlfriend.”_

_“Ugh. Whatever. I so don’t have time for this. I have a date to plan.”_

_“Bye Nancy.”_

Lexa watches Niylah walk away, a smirk plastered on her face. Something about seeing the girl so flustered makes Lexa feel unbelievably proud, until she thinks about Clarke’s date. Her jealousy seeps in full force rendering her immobile. In her haste to be on time to class, she took Clarke’s sweat shirt, her phone nestled safely in the pocket. The feeling of the soft fabric against her skin melts away her jealousy. She lifts the sleeves up to her nose, inhaling deeply. A soft sigh leaves her mouth as her senses are filled with all things Clarke. She smells summer rain, sunshine and a warm breeze and she is slowly becoming addicting to the scent. She takes another sniff of the hoodie before pulling her hands away to pull her phone out of the pocket.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:30 a.m.)** Do we have any alcohol in the house?

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:30 a.m.)** Its way too fuckin’ early to ask that question.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:31 a.m.)** Well. It’s not my fault that you were up all night banging the mechanic.

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:31 a.m.)** If you knew the things that girl could do with her tongue….

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:32 a.m.)** Just answer the damn question.

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:32 a.m.)** I’m pretty sure that we have some tequila left from the last time we got drunk and we have that bottle of wine that I bought a couple weeks ago.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:33 a.m.)** Are you going to be home tonight?

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:33 a.m.)** No. Raven and I are going out on a date.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:34 a.m.)** Oh. It’s getting serious between you and Miss Reyes.

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:34 a.m.)** Shut up. I don’t want to jinx it.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:35 a.m.)** Oh please, she’s crazy about you.

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:35 a.m.)** No she’s not.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:36 a.m.)** Yes she is. Speaking of, why haven’t you guys made it official yet?

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:37 a.m.)** I don’t know Heda, it just hasn’t come up.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:37 a.m.)** Well you need to quit wasting time and lock it up.

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:38 a.m.)** I think that you need to heed your own advice.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:38 a.m.)** I don’t know what you mean.

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:39 a.m.)** Sure you don’t. Is there a point to this conversation? Because I have a hot woman in my bed and you’re giving me a headache.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:39 a.m.)** Nope. Just needed to know if we had alcohol. Have fun.

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:40 a.m.)** Oh I WILL ;)

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:40 a.m.)** Gross.

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (10:40 a.m.)** Take the long way home. Raven gets kind of loud.

 **Leksa Kom Trikru: (10:41 a.m.)** I already know. I heard you guys banging all night long.

Lexa tucks her phone away into the hoodie pocket with a sigh before leaving the lecture hall.

_~*~*~*~*~*_

_“I can’t do this Raven.”_ Clarke calls out from the bathroom, panic lacing her voice.

 _“Princess, you’re going to be fine.”_ Raven’s head peeks into the bathroom with a smirk on face. _“You look hot Clarke.”_

 _“Thanks.”_ Clarke turns away from the mirror to face Raven, her eyeliner hanging idly in her in hand. _“I feel really nervous.”_

_“You’re kidding me right?”_

_“No. I haven’t gone on an actual date in almost three years.”_

_“I know. But wearing that, you could literally not say a word and she would still be eating out of the palm of your hand.”_

_“Thanks for picking it out.”_

_“Oh you’re welcome. Whatever it takes to get you laid.”_

_“Raven!!”_ Clarke gasps. _“I don’t plan on having sex with her tonight.”_

_“Well you should. You are the only one that’s not getting laid. I wouldn’t be your best friend if I wasn’t trying to help.”_

_“Thanks. As if I didn’t already know that I’m not getting laid.”_

_“Well honey, in this dress, you won’t have a problem with that.”_

_“Get your mind out of the gutter, Reyes.”_

_“Oh baby, it lives there permanently. Speaking of which, you should probably hurry up, Niylah should be here in about ten minutes.”_

_“Shit! I can’t do this.”_

_“Clarke, seriously. You are going to be fine. Now hurry up and finishing getting ready. Holler if you need me.”_

Raven ducks back out of the bathroom, leaving Clarke to her own devices. Before she knows it, a knock can be heard at their front door. She can hear Raven’s muffled voice alongside what she assumes is Niylah’s. Raven’s head pokes into the bathroom, a grin on her face.

_“Niylah is here.”_

_“I’m gonna be sick.”_

_“Clarke it’s going to be fine. Quit being a pussy and go get some pussy.”_

_“Oh my god Raven!!”_

_“It’s true. Now go get her tiger.”_

Clarke rolls her eyes, brushing past her roommate in the doorway. She stops in front of her date, a wide grin plastered on her face. Niylah’s eyes darken slightly as she takes in the sight of Clarke in the dress that Raven picked out.

_“You look gorgeous Clarke.”_

Clarke ducks her head slightly, a red blush spreading across her cheeks. _“Thank you Niylah. You look beautiful as well.”_

_“Oh please. I can’t compare to you.”_

_“Okay guys, this is just plan gross. I have a date tonight and you guys are giving me diabetes with your sickeningly sweet compliments. So please for the love of my pancreas, stop.”_

_“You’re such a dick, Raven!”_

_“I’d rather be one than have one.”_

_“For fuck’s sake.”_ Clarke turns her attention towards her date. _“Let’s get out of here before she says something else that I will regret.”_

 _“Of course.”_ Niylah puts her hand on the small of Clarke’s back, leading the blonde out of the dorm room. _“It was nice to see you again, Raven.”_

 _“You too Niylah.”_ The brunette steps out into the hallway behind the other two. _“Clarke, did you remember to trim your fingernails?”_

_“Jesus Christ!”_

_“Save those words for later, Princess.”_

_“Raven! Get back inside!”_

_“Remember girls, if you need the morning after pill, you can get it over the counter now.”_

_“RAVEN!!!”_

Raven chuckles. _“Okay, okay I’m going. Have fun; don’t do anything that I wouldn’t do. All of that crap. Bye!”_

Raven saunters back into the dorm room, closing the door behind her.

_“I am so sorry about Raven. I would say that she isn’t normally like that but she is.”_

Niylah chuckles, her hand still pressed softly against Clarke’s back. _“It’s totally fine. I like her, she’s really funny.”_

_“Try living with her.”_

_“At least you have an awesome roommate. When I lived in the dorms, I am pretty sure that my roommate was a serial killer.”_

_“Yeah my roommate freshman year was a total jerk. Raven and I actually met each other by dating the same guy.”_

_“Oh I can’t wait to hear this story.”_

_“I will need at least two glasses before I relive that part of my life.”_

_“Deal. After you milady.”_ Niylah opens the passenger side door for Clarke, smiling as the blonde steps into the car.

_“Thank you.”_

_“You’re very welcome.”_

Niylah closes the door, making her way over to the driver’s side. Clarke can feel butterflies settle deep in her belly, nerves making her hands shake as she buckles her seatbelt. After a few fumbling attempts, the blonde manages to buckle herself in. As her gaze shifts back from her lap, her eyes lock with Niylah’s, an amused smile on the brunette’s face. Clarke feels her face heat up in embarrassment, red marking her cheeks.

_“Sorry. I’m really nervous. I haven’t been on a date in a long time.”_

Niylah laughs. _“No need to be nervous, Clarke. Let’s just go out, have some dinner and see where the night takes us.”_

_“Sounds good to me. So where are we going to eat?”_

_“Patience Miss Griffin.”_ Niylah chuckles as she starts her car.

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Alright, let’s see what the big deal is with this Tarantino guy.”_

Lexa lifts her legs up on the couch, tucking them underneath her body. She snuggles deeply into the couch, throwing a small fleece blanket over her sweat pant covered legs. Signing into her Netflix account, she pulls up her queue. The majority of the movies that she has saved are documentaries. Just this week, she searched through imdb and added movies directed or written by Quentin Tarantino. She’s not sure why the blonde is obsessed with his movies, but she is willing to give them a shot.

Queuing up the first one, a drama titled ‘Pulp Fiction’, she settles in for the film. She has settled in for a night at home. Sweat pants on, her hair up in a messy bun. She opted to take her contacts out, changing them out for her thin-rimmed glasses.

The one thing that she couldn’t bring herself to change out of is the red hoodie that she ‘borrowed’ from Clarke earlier today. The soft red fabric pressing against her bare skin that isn’t covered by her tank top feels like heaven. The hoodie still smells strongly of the blonde, mixed with the faint smell of roasted coffee beans. She pulls the hood over her head, snuggling into the hoodie.

Lexa begins the film, grabbing her plate and wine glass off of the table. She balances the plate on the arm rest of the couch as she takes a drink of her wine. She isn’t normally one to partake in alcohol consumption, especially since Costia died, but she has read a little bit about this director. She knows that his movies have a tendency to be excessively violent, so the wine is a must have.

Twenty minutes into the movie has Lexa walking into the kitchen to grab the bottle of wine. She pours herself a full glass, gulping it down quickly. Had she read up on the synopsis of the movie, she might have skipped this one. ‘Too late now,’ is running through her head as she pours another glass. She finishes the second full glass of wine before filling her glass again. She has enough of the bottle left for another glass, so she brings the bottle back with her. She settles back on the couch, sipping at her wine, her sandwich long forgotten.

Halfway through her third full glass, she begins to feel her head swim slightly. Mia and Vincent are dancing in the restaurant as she finishes her glass. She pours the rest of the bottle into her cup before setting them both on the table. Her hand brushes her phone as it stretches across the table. She knows that she is pretty close to being drunk, if her current state of giddiness is anything to go by. She knows that texting somebody right now would be unwise, but she can’t help but want to talk to Clarke about the movie that she is suffering through. Opening their conversation thread, she slowly types out a message, careful to avoid any typos.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:30 p.m.)** Clarke. I hate this movie.

The response doesn’t come right away. Lexa almost gives up hope that the blonde is even going to answer back. She is halfway tempted to put her phone back on the table when her notification tone goes off.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:35 p.m.)** What movie are you watching? A bad documentary or something?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:35 p.m.)** No, Clarke. I decided to watch one of your Tarantino films.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:36 p.m.)** Oh my god. Which one did you choose?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:36 p.m.)** The one with the guy from ‘Grease.’

 **Skai Prisa: (07:37 p.m.)** Lol. You mean John Travolta?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:37 p.m.)** I guess so. Anyway. This movie is so tastelessly violent.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:38 p.m.)** Welcome to the world of Quentin Tarantino. His movies are always violent.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:38 p.m.)** Well it’s excessive. I do have to say that I admire Mr. Vega’s suit.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:39 p.m.)** Yeah. I mean it’s a pretty nice suit.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:39 p.m.)** You know, I’ve always wanted to own a suit.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:39 p.m.)** A suit? Really?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:40 p.m.)** Yes. I think that I would look very fetching in a suit. Don’t you think that I would look good in a suit, Clarke?

 **Skai Prisa: (07:40 p.m.)** I think that you would totally rock a suit Lexa.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:41 p.m.)** It’s settled. I’m going to buy a suit the next time I go shopping.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:41 p.m.)** Well you’ll have to let me know what you pick out.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:42 p.m.)** You’ll get firsthand knowledge.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:42 p.m.)** What do you mean?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:42 p.m.)** Well you have to go with me to pick out the suit.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:43 p.m.)** We’ll see about it. ;)

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:43 p.m.)** Oh it’s going to happen.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:43 p.m.)** Of course I’ll go with you Lexa. I’ll text you later, my date just finished up her phone call.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:44 p.m.)** Of course. I forgot you were on a date. I will go back to watching this Grease man stab a woman in the chest.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:44 p.m.)** Lol. I’ll text you later Lexa.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:44 p.m.)** I’ll be counting down the moments.

Lexa places her phone back on the table, turning her slightly fuzzy attention back towards the awkwardly violent movie. The movie credits roll as the brunette drains the rest of her wine. Lexa’s phone chimes again as the television screen shifts back to the Netflix screen. She grabs her phone, knocking her sandwich off of the couch and onto the living room floor.

 _“Son of a bitch.”_ Lexa curses as the sandwich contents are spread across the floor. She ignores the mess, opting to check her phone instead. The fuzziness from her brain has spread to her eyes, causing her vision to blur. She squints one spectacled eye as she reads her message.

 **Onya: (08:50 p.m.)** How’s it going Heda?

Lexa knows that she is super drunk now. It takes her three rereads in order for her brain to comprehend the three simple words that her best friend has just written. Her tongue peeks out of her mouth as she contemplates her response.

 **Heda Leksa: (08:53 p.m.)** Annnyaaa!!!!

 **Onya: (08:53 p.m.)** Hey babe! Are you drunk?

 **Heda Leksa: (08:55 p.m.)** No way JOSE!! I had like this manyyyyyy.

 **Onya: (08:55 p.m.)** Lexa, you are texting me. I can’t see how many fingers you’re holding up.

 **Heda Leksa: (08:59 p.m.)** Stop writing sooo many words. I can’t read.

 **Onya: (09:00 p.m.)** Oh honey. You’re smashed, aren’t you?

 **Heda Leksa: (09:01 p.m.)** I told you, I’m ffffffffffffiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeee

 **Onya: (09:02 p.m.)** Sure you are honey. Are you at home right now?

 **Heda Leksa: (09:03 p.m.)** Yes. Where else would I be?

 **Onya: (09:03 p.m.)** I’m just making sure that you’re safe.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:04 p.m.)** I can’t believe that you would think that I would be out drinking.

 **Onya: (09:05 p.m.)** I’m just looking out for you Lexa. It is my job after all.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:06 p.m.)** I know. And I LOVE U for that.

 **Onya: (09:06 p.m**.) Okay Heda, go to bed. You must be smashed if you are telling me that you love me. I’ll be home as soon as Clarke gets back from her date.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:07 p.m.)** Clarke?? You get to see Clarke?

 **Onya: (09:07 p.m.)** Yeah probably in passing. Why?

 **Heda Leksa: (09:08 p.m.)** I bet that she looks beautiful tonight.

 **Onya: (09:08 p.m.)** Probably. Raven picked out a dress for her.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:09 p.m.)** I wish that I could’ve seen her dress. I should have asked her about it when I was texting her.

 **Onya: (09:10 p.m.)** You were texting her? How drunk were you when this was happening?

 **Heda Leksa: (09:11 p.m.)** It was like 730 or so. I wasn’t very drunk. Maybe buzzed a little.

 **Onya: (09:11 p.m.)** Fuck. Hopefully you didn’t send her any mushy shit.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:13 p.m.)** We talked about me buying and wearing a suit and about the movie that I watched earlier.

 **Onya: (09:13 p.m.)** Okay. I want to come back to the suit when you’re sober. What movie did you watch?

 **Heda Leksa: (09:15 p.m.)** It was a movie with the greasy guy and he wore a suit. He stabbed a woman in the heart. And something about fake pulp. But I don’t think that they mentioned orange juice at all.

 **Onya: (09:16 p.m.)** What the fuck are you talking about? Are you watching one of those weird documentaries again?

 **Onya: (09:20 p.m.)** Lexa? Did you pass out finally?

 **Onya: (09:25 p.m.)** Thank god. You are a hot mess.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:27 p.m.)** Sorry. I found a sandwich on the floor. And I was eating it.

 **Onya: (09:27 p.m.)** You ate something off of the floor?!?!

 **Heda Leksa: (09:28 p.m.)** Yeah. I was hungry.

 **Onya: (09:28 p.m.)** Oh my god Lexa. How did a fucking sandwich get on the floor?

 **Heda Leksa: (09:29 p.m.)** I don’t know. I figured that you left it there for me.

 **Onya: (09:29 p.m.)** You thought that I left you a sandwich, on the floor?

 **Heda Leksa: (09:30 p.m.)** Well yeah. How else would it have gotten there?

 **Onya: (09:30 p.m.)** I don’t know, maybe you put it there.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:31 p.m.)** That’s ludicrous. Why would I put a sandwich on the floor?

 **Onya: (09:31 p.m.)** I don’t know, maybe because you’re fucking drunk?

 **Heda Leksa: (09:33 p.m.)** That doesn’t make any sense.

 **Onya: (09:33 p.m.)** Okay look. Go the hell to sleep. I will be home in a few hours. I would like to bang my girlfriend again before I leave and I can’t do that while you talk to me about floor sandwiches FFS.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:35 p.m.)** FINE : (

 **Onya: (09:35 p.m.)** Oh I know you’re drunk. You didn’t catch something in that message.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:36 p.m.)** I’m asleep.

 **Onya: (09:36 p.m.)** I’m done talking to you.

 **Heda Leksa: (09:37 p.m.)** I’M SLEEPING!!!

Lexa places her phone on the table, her body stretching out across the couch. Clarke is the last thought in her mind as she falls asleep with a smile on her face.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke was a nervous wreck, the swirling queasiness in her stomach making it nearly impossible to eat. By the fourth attempt to calm her rattled nerves, she knows that she is not going to be able to enjoy her food. She opts for her wine glass instead, draining its contents in one gulp. She grabs the bottle on the table, pouring herself another glass.

 _“Whoa there, you should probably eat if you are going to drink more wine.”_ Niylah laughs, taking a bite of her meal.

_“I’m sorry. I am just like insanely nervous.”_

_“Clarke.”_ Niylah places her hand over Clarke’s, the warmth making the blonde sigh with comfort. _“Don’t be nervous. Seriously. We spent pretty much your entire shift talking yesterday. I already like you. You’re gorgeous, insanely funny and ridiculously charming.”_

_“Wow. You sure know how to make a girl blush.”_

_“I’m just telling you the truth.”_

_“Stop.”_ Clarke takes a small bite of her pasta, swallowing the food before continuing. _“You’re being too sweet.”_

 _“Just take the compliment blondie.”_ Niylah laughs softly, taking a drink of her wine. _“So tell me, why did you choose to major in Art?”_

 _“Going straight for the heavy stuff on the first date, are we?”_ Clarke takes a gulp of her wine to settle her nerves.

_“You don’t have to answer that if you don’t want you. I don’t want to upset you or anything.”_

_“No it’s totally fine. Where do I start?”_ Clarke contemplates her story, trying to figure out what course of action is less likely to upset her. _“I have always loved to draw. The beauty of lines and shapes, colors and hues are just so calming. My mother had other plans for me. She told me that art was a hobby, not a career. I was going to be a surgeon like she is. My father wanted me to do whatever made me happy, regardless of what my mom said. When he died, my mom told me that her daughter was going to be a doctor, not a crappy street artist. So my first semester of school I was pre-med. By the end of the semester I told my mom that I couldn’t do it. I didn’t want to become a doctor. I love helping people, don’t get me wrong. But I just fell out of love with it.”_

_“That’s pretty heavy first date conversation.”_

_“Hey, you asked.”_ Clarke chugs the rest of her wine. She laughs slightly as the warm feeling of the wine courses though her body. _“So when I told my mom that I wanted to change my major, she absolutely flipped her shit. After an hour of being yelled at for ruining her life by being completely irresponsible, I told her that I was going to major in Art. That started another hour long yelling session from her. By the end of it she had all but disowned me, claiming that I was trying to ruin her reputation. She told me that she would not fund my tuition fees if I changed my major. I did it anyway. And now here we are. I pretty much never talk to her, unless she needs me to come to some function for her hospital. I pay for all of my schooling out of pocket.”_

_“Wow. That’s intense. I’m sorry Clarke.”_

_“It’s not your fault. My mom and I’s relationship has always been somewhat tumultuous. Ever since my dad died, it’s only gotten worse.”_

_“That sucks. How do you manage to afford tuition?”_

_“I work two different jobs. Plus grants.”_

_“Do you ever sleep?”_

_“Eh. Sometimes. I drink a lot of caffeine. Plus the meth helps.”_ Niylah’s eyes widen at Clarke’s admission, the blonde laughing heartily. _“I’m so kidding.”_

 _“I figured, since you still have all of your teeth and all.”_ Niylah laughs, taking a sip of her wine.

_“What about you, why Law?”_

_“I don’t really have a story as to why; it’s just what I’ve always wanted to do, ever since I was younger.”_

_“I can respect that.”_

_“So what do you normally do in your spare time?”_

_“I don’t know the meaning of spare time. I literally work all of the time when I am not in class. This is probably the first time I have had a Friday off in months.”_

_“That’s crazy. You shouldn’t have to work so hard.”_

_“Meh.”_ Clarke shrugs her shoulders. _“I’m used to it. Just a year and a half left until I can relax and graduate.”_

 _“Yeah. Well at least that is something to look forward to. I jus….”_ Niylah’s words are cut off by her phone ringing. She glances at the screen before looking back up at the blonde with a grimace. _“I am so sorry Clarke, I have to take this. It’s work and if they’re calling me, something is wrong.”_

Clarke laughs lightly. _“Go, go. I’ll be here.”_

Niylah smiles at Clarke before walking away, barking something into her cell phone. Clarke relaxes in her chair, intent on trying to eat a little bit more of her food so she doesn’t get wasted off of the wine that she has consumed. Her phone chimes out a text notification as she takes her first bite. She sighs, trying to ignore the phone since she told herself that she would not text on her date. She wanted to give Niylah her full attention. After a minute’s hesitation, she decides ‘fuck it’ since Niylah had to step away for a phone call.

She expected a text from Octavia asking how the date was going. Or maybe even an inappropriate text message from Raven, taking about her nonexistent sex life.

What Clarke didn’t expect was a text message from Lexa. So she was definitely surprised when she finally gave into the desire to look at her cell phone.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:30 p.m.)** Clarke. I hate this movie.

A goofy grin takes over the blonde’s face as she reads the message that Lexa sent her. Slightly confused by the message, she types out her reply, eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:35 p.m.)** What movie are you watching? A bad documentary or something?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:35 p.m.)** No, Clarke. I decided to watch one of your Tarantino films.

Clarke’s boisterous laugh breaks out in the restaurant, the idea of Lexa watching a Tarantino film a ridiculously funny thought.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:36 p.m.)** Oh my god. Which one did you choose?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:36 p.m.)** The one with the guy from ‘Grease.’

Another laugh breaks out, Clarke covering her mouth to stifle it. She knew that Lexa didn’t really watch movies and that her knowledge of actors would be somewhat limited. She did not expect Lexa to not know who John Travolta is, let alone not be slightly familiar with arguably the best film that Tarantino has done. The brunette continues to surprise the blonde in the best ways possible. Her sheer ignorance when it comes to cult classic films makes Clarke’s heart flutter in her chest.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:37 p.m.)** Lol. You mean John Travolta?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:37 p.m.)** I guess so. Anyway. This movie is so tastelessly violent.

Tastelessly violent. Such a Lexa comment. Clarke can’t help the snort that leaves her mouth, her fondness for the brunette growing exponentially.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:38 p.m.)** Welcome to the world of Quentin Tarantino. His movies are always violent.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:38 p.m.)** Well it’s excessive. I do have to say that I admire Mr. Vega’s suit.

A suit? Clarke’s brow furrows in confusion, her slightly drunk brain unable to fathom why the brunette is focusing on the suit. Out of all of the things that Lexa could comment on in the movie so far, she chooses to comment on Vincent Vega’s suit?

 **Skai Prisa: (07:39 p.m.)** Yeah. I mean it’s a pretty nice suit.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:39 p.m.)** You know, I’ve always wanted to own a suit.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:39 p.m.)** A suit? Really?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:40 p.m.)** Yes. I think that I would look very fetching in a suit. Don’t you think that I would look good in a suit, Clarke?

Clarke chokes back a gasp. Her mouth runs completely dry at the thought of Lexa in a fitted suit. Clarke’s mind focuses on snug slacks resting on Lexa’s slim hips. On the tight fitted, crisp white blouse hugging the brunette’s breasts. Arousal pools in the blonde’s core as she thinks about Lexa with the fitted jacket over her shoulder, a tie hung loosely around her neck. Clarke sucks in a shuddering breath, trying to shake away the inappropriate images.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:40 p.m.)** I think that you would totally rock a suit Lexa.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:41 p.m.)** It’s settled. I’m going to buy a suit the next time I go shopping.

 _“Fuck me.”_ Clarke quietly curses as her mind conjures up more images of her friend dressed to the nines in a suit. She knows that she shouldn’t have these thoughts about her friend, but the idea of the brunette in a suit is causing her brain to short circuit.

**-Think innocent thoughts. Get your shit together Griffin!-**

**Skai Prisa: (07:41 p.m.)** Well you’ll have to let me know what you pick out.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:42 p.m.)** You’ll get firsthand knowledge.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:42 p.m.)** What do you mean?

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:42 p.m.)** Well you have to go with me to pick out the suit.

 _“Jesus Christ!”_ Clarke cries out, slamming her fist on the table. Her eyes widen at her outburst as she claps her hand over her mouth, a few patrons sending glares her way. “Sorry,” she sheepishly states, shrugging her shoulders slightly. The patrons quickly lose interest in her, turning their attentions back to their food. Clarke turns her attention back to her phone, her heartbeat thrumming steadily against her ribs as she rereads the text message.

Her mind, being the vengeful bitch that it is, conjures up images of Lexa trying on suits in front of Clarke. Her slim body half way dressed in the fitting room, pulling slacks on as she stands in front of a mirror in just her bra. She can’t stop the shutter that runs through her body as she hears Lexa’s sultry voice calling out her for help, asking the blonde to help straighten out her shirt. Her heart skips a few beats as she pictures her body pressed up against Lexa’s, straightening out the brunette’s collar and sleeves. Her face pressed up against the brunette’s neck, nostrils flaring as she is assaulted by Lexa’s scent.

Clarke licks her painfully dry lips, her body’s reaction to the brunette’s text messages making itself painfully aware in her now ruined pair of underwear. She clenches her thighs together to dull the ache between them, her hands shaking violently as she types out her response.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:43 p.m.)** We’ll see about it. ;)

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:43 p.m.)** Oh it’s going to happen.

Clarke’s breath hitches in her throat, the brunette’s seemingly innocent text message sending her mind to a not so innocent place.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:43 p.m**.) Of course I’ll go with you Lexa. I’ll text you later, my date just finished up her phone call.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:44 p.m.)** Of course. I forgot you were on a date. I will go back to watching this Grease man stab a woman in the chest.

 **Skai Prisa: (07:44 p.m.)** Lol. I’ll text you later Lexa.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (07:44 p.m.)** I’ll be counting down the moments.

Clarke can’t stop the fluttering in her chest as she reads Lexa’s last text message, the promise of the brunette waiting on her eliciting feelings that she has been trying to ignore. The biggest reason that she agreed to this date was to try and forget about her blossoming feelings towards the brunette. She knows that it wasn’t necessarily fair of her to agree to this date with Niylah to try and forget about Lexa, but she is genuinely enjoying the brunette’s company. She had successfully managed to curb her thoughts about Lexa as she enjoyed her ‘liquid’ dinner, until the brunette sent her a simple text message.

Lexa’s has the ability to make Clarke feel so intensely with a simple text message and it honestly scares the shit out of her. She wants so badly for Lexa to want her, but she can’t spend her time pining over unrequited love? Like? Lust? At this point Clarke isn’t really sure. All she knows is that she needs to put a stop to her raging teenaged hormones that Lexa seems to evoke. She laughs sardonically at herself as she places her phone back on the table. Her eyes meet Niylah’s gaze as the brunette sits back down, a slight smile on her face.

_“What’s got you so smiley, Clarke? Happy to see me?”_

_“What?”_ Clarke’s eyebrows furrow in confusion. _“Sorry. I didn’t hear you.”_

_“Oh. I just asked what has you all smiley.”_

_“Oh it’s nothing. My friend just sent me a text. She’s watching Pulp Fiction for the first time and she doesn’t really care for the violence.”_

_“Dude! She’s totally missing out. Tarantino films are awesome.”_

_“I know right?! He’s a fantastic director.”_

_“So. I was going to see if you wanted to go watch a movie after dinner. Have you seen the Hateful Eight yet?”_

_“No. I haven’t really had the time.”_

_“Well I’m sure that one of the theatres in town is still playing it if you want to go.”_

_“Are you kidding me? Of course I would love to go.”_

_“Awesome! Are you ready to leave?”_

_“Yeah. If you are ready to go. We just have to pay.”_

_“Oh I paid on my way back in from my phone call.”_

_“You didn’t have to do that. I was going to pay for dinner.”_

_“No way. I asked you out Clarke, which means that I pay.”_

Clarke juts her lip out in a pout, eliciting a chuckle from the brunette. _“Fine. But I am paying for the movie.”_

_“Fair enough.”_

_“Let’s blow this popsicle stand, babe.”_

Clarke offers her hand to Niylah, interlocking their fingers when the brunette grabs her hand. The two women make their way out of the restaurant hand in hand.

As it turns out they were able to find a theatre that was still playing Hateful Eight without much difficulty. Niylah tried to argue about paying for the movie while they were in line at the box office. After another famous ‘Clarke Griffin pout,’ the blonde was able to con her way into paying for the tickets. Niylah forced Clarke to allow her to buy the snacks, purchasing a medium popcorn and a cherry coke for them to share.

Finding two seats in the middle of the theatre, the two women sit down. There are only about five other people sharing the theatre with them. Clarke settles in her seat, pulling out her phone to silence the volume. They have about ten minutes until the previews begin, both women snacking on the popcorn as they make idle conversation.

 _“Thanks for agreeing to go out with me. I hope you’ve had fun.”_ Niylah states with a smile as her eyes flit down to Clarke’s lips.

_“I’ve had a great time. I’m sorry if I haven’t been the best date tonight. I haven’t done this in a long time.”_

_“You’ve done great. I’ve enjoyed spending time with you.”_

_“Me too.”_

_“I really would like to kiss you right now.”_

_“I can’t say that I would be opposed to that.”_

_“Good.”_ Niylah leans in, closing the distance between the two.

Niylah’s lips press softly against Clarke’s, hesitant as they mold against hers. The kiss is soft, exploring and sweet, everything that Clarke doesn’t want at this moment. She presses her tongue against the seam of Niylah’s lips, asking the older girl for permission. The brunette grants Clarke access without hesitation, groaning as the blonde’s confident tongue slips into her mouth. Niylah kisses the blonde back with matching fervor, stroking her tongue against Clarke’s. They break apart when air becomes a necessity, pressing their lips softly together a few times as they catch their breaths.

 _“Wow.”_ Niylah puffs out against Clarke’s lips. _“I have wanted to do that since the first time I saw you.”_

_“Oh,” Clarke laughs lightly, “So since yesterday.”_

_“Actually, I’ve been coming into the bar for a couple of months now.”_

_“So you’ve been creep stalking me?”_

_“Basically. Last night was the first night that I had the courage to talk to you.”_

_“Well I’m glad that you did.”_

_“Me too. You have no idea how much.”_

_“You are such a charmer.”_

The two women quiet down as the theatre’s lights dim. They are silent throughout the film, absorbing the awesomeness that is Quentin Tarantino.

The drive home is filled with conversation about the movie, both women gushing about how much they loved the movie. They make plans to see each other again as soon as Clarke has another day off. Clarke kisses Niylah at her door, keeping it chaste and sweet this time.

Clarke walks into her dorm room, shutting the door quickly. The lights in the room are off, the only source of light coming from their shared television.

Clarke was not prepared for the sight before her. Anya is splayed out on Raven’s bed with the brunette straddling her waist. Anya’s hands are on Raven’s bare chest, kneading her best friend’s breasts. Clarke’s mouth drops open as her eyes drop to the floor. By the pleasured gasps coming from her friend’s lips, the two women did not hear her walk in. Clarke makes her way to her bed quietly so she doesn’t alert the other two in the room. She drops her purse on her bed, grabbing her shower caddy, towel and pajamas before leaving the dorm quietly.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa wakes up in a cold sweat, her nightmare still fresh in her drunken mind. The pounding of her heart against her ribcage is painful and rapid, her breath elevated and rapid.

Her usual nightmare lingers, only slightly altered from its usual direction. Instead of Costia dying, Clarke’s screams fill Lexa’s mind.

Lexa slides her glasses up on top of her head, fingers rubbing the sleep out of her tear filled eyes.

She reaches for her cell phone as soon as she is able to calm herself down. Her first instinct is to call the blonde, her mind still adamant that the dream was in fact real. She doesn’t know if the blonde is still awake, or if she is otherwise occupied with her date.

So she decides that a text message is optimal. If the blonde is not busy she might answer back, assuring that she is still, in fact, alive. Judging by the fact that Lexa has not been woken up to go to her bed, Anya must not be home yet. Anya still being could mean that Clarke is still out on her date. Or maybe the blonde went home with Niylah, allowing Anya the chance to stay the night with Raven. Lexa feels her jealousy monster rear its ugly head, envy overtaking her ability to think straight. She opens her conversation with Clarke, drunkenly typing out a message to her ‘friend.’

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (11:20 p.m.)** I want to ask how your date went but I can’t muster up the courage. I am so incredibly jealous of Niylah. She gets to have all of you, all because she isn’t afraid. I wish that I wasn’t broken so that I could take you out on dates, hold your hand and kiss you goodnight. I’m so sorry that we can’t ever have those things, because together we would be amazing.

BTW-I hate being your friend. Wait, no that came out wrong. I hate that I can only be your friend, because I want so much more. So I will continue to admire you from afar, and wish certain death upon anybody who gets to touch you when I can’t.

Reshop, Skai Prisa. **(Goodnight Sky Princess.)**

Sucking in a deep breath, the brunette sends the text message before she can chicken out. Her slightly drunk mind doesn’t register what she has just done.

It isn’t until she goes to bed an hour later, still heavily buzzed, that she realizes the grave mistake that she has just made.

_“Fuck.”_

 

**-TBC-**

**Come stalk me on Tumblr-@jeffrinamichelle!**

 


	6. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -Lexa and Clarke have a friendly pancake date  
> -Raven and Anya are still going at it like rabbits.  
> -Lexa lets her jealousy get the better of her.  
> -No Niylah in this chapter. (I know that some of you don't like her very much)  
> -A super awesome surprise or two at the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Here is it Beautiful People. The next update for your viewing pleasure. I hope that you enjoy. Feel free to let me know what you thought by commenting or reviewing. Or you can harass me on Tumblr @Jeffrinamichelle. Thank you guys for the comments, reviews, favorites and kudos that you have left so far. I hope that this story continues to fill you guys with slow burn feels. Song credits in this chapter go to The Pretty Reckless. The song that Lexa sings is called 'You.' If you haven't heard it before, you should check it out.

**-Barista’s Choice-**

 

**~Chapter 5~**

 

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“You have a lot of explaining to do.”_

_“Ughhhh…go away.”_

_“Lexa, get the fuck up.”_

_“Fuck you.”_

_“Fine. Just remember that you brought this upon yourself.”_

Lexa’s sleep heavy eyes shoot open as she feels the sensation of her body falling. She knows that she is probably dreaming, but her theory is proven wrong as her body slams into the floor. The air is knocked out of her in a whoosh, a pained grunt the only noise that she is able to make. Her bloodshot eyes narrow as they search out her best friend. Anya is standing at the end of the couch with her arms crossed over her chest. Her dirty blonde hair is mussed and tangled and she has last night’s clothes still covering her body.

 _“Dick.”_ Lexa coughs out as she rubs at the hip that hit the ground. She sucks in a few staggering breaths, grimacing slightly at the pain.

_“Hey. I gave you plenty of warning. Now get off of your ass, we need to have a discussion.”_

_“Are you sure that you don’t want to change your clothes first, Miss Walkofshame?”_

_“Fuck you. We have much bigger things to discuss than my choice of attire.”_

Lexa drags her hungover body into a sitting position on the floor, her head protesting with a sharp pound at each movement. She groans as she is hit with a sudden wave of nausea, her mouth watering dangerously.

_“Ugh. I’m never drinking again.”_

_“Nobody told you to drink the whole bottle of wine.”_

_“Anya, if you had seen that movie, you would’ve done the same thing.”_

_“I found out from Clarke what movie you were watching and I’ve seen Pulp Fiction. It’s a really good movie.”_

Lexa groans as she drops her head into her hands.

_“Anya. I want to argue with you about that violence fest but I am too hungover. I will give you my left arm if you get me some water and advil.”_

_“Make it your left tit and you’ve got a deal.”_

_“What!?”_ Lexa lifts her head up to look at Anya with a scowl on her face. Her annoyance is short lived as the bright living room assaults her sensitive eyes.

 _“Honey after we discuss what I woke you up for, you will willingly give me both tits.”_ Anya calls from the kitchen as she fills a glass with water. She brings the full glass back to the living room, handing the glass to the brunette with a smirk. Lexa takes the glass with a grateful smile, gulping down half the glass before holding her hand out for the advil. Lexa pops both of the pills, using the last of her water to wash them down.

_“Thank you.”_

_“Not a problem babe. So let’s talk about last night.”_

_“Ugh.”_ Lexa runes her fingers through her sleep tousled hair. _“Do we have to?”_

 _“Yes we do.”_ Anya slides off of the couch, taking a seat on the floor next to her best friend. _“How much do you remember about last night?”_

_“Um. I remember texting you after I was done texting Clarke.”_

_“Okay. So you don’t remember texting anybody after like ten o’clock?”_

_“No. I remember passing out on the couch. I woke up at one point because I had a nightmare, but I went back to sleep. And now here we are.”_

_“Oh honey. If only that were your entire night.”_

Lexa’s brow furrows with confusion. _“What do you mean?”_

_“Did you happen to look at the time when you woke up from your nightmare?”_

_“No. I think that it took about an hour for me to calm down. I was still pretty drunk so details are pretty much nonexistent but I don’t remember the time.”_

_“Well. Let me just refresh your memory for you. And you have to promise me that you won’t freak out.”_

Lexa feels panic rising in her chest. Her inability to remember what exactly happened last night making her heart pound against her ribcage. She should’ve known better than to drink last night. She had been successful in her choice to stay away from ingesting copious amounts of alcohol since Costia’s death, only indulging in the occasional glass of wine. The jealousy of Clark being on a date with Niylah proving to be too much for the brunette to bare, at least whilst being sober. Had she known that her self-control would’ve been so poor that she allowed herself to get black out drunk; then she would’ve ignored the urge to drink.

_“Why do I need to promise you that?”_

_“Because what I am about to tell you is kind of a big deal.”_

_“Fine. I promise that I won’t freak out.”_

_“Okay. I don’t believe you, but this is something that we have to talk about. Last night I was with Raven in her and Clarke’s dorm room. We were in the middle of….”_

_“Yuck. I need you to not go into details. My stomach cannot take it.”_

_“Okay sheesh, you drama queen. So anyway. Raven and I were in the middle of some things when Clarke got back from her date. Well, we were too busy to notice that she had walked in, so we continued on with our activities. Clarke grabbed her shower caddy and left the room.”_

_“What is the point to this story?”_

_“I’m getting there jeez. I forgot how mean you are when you are hungover.”_

_“Shof op.”_ **(Shut up.)**

_“I’m just speaking the truth. Anyway. We were about halfway through when Clarke walked in so we finished up before she came back from her shower. About ten minutes before she walked back into the dorm, her phone went off. Raven has no chill and she frequently snoops through Clarke’s phone. So needless to say, when she saw that it was a text from one ‘Green-Eyed Beauty,’ she was intrigued. She opened up Clarke’s phone and read the text message. Would you like to know what it said?”_

_“Yes please.”_

_“Well let’s see here. The text that you sent to Clarke said that you wished that you had the courage to ask how her date went. That you were jealous of Niylah because she gets to take Clarke out, hold her hand and kiss her goodnight. That together you guys would be amazing if you weren’t broken.”_

Lexa’s eyes widen in disbelief as Anya’s words sink in.

_“Then you said that you hate being only her friend because you want so much more. You ended the text message with a ‘Reshop Skai Prisa.’’_

_“Bullshit.”_

_“Seriously Lex. That’s what happened.”_

_“I don’t believe you.”_

_“Yeah, I didn’t think that you would. So I have this.”_

Anya pulls her cell phone out of her pocket, unlocking it before handing it over to her best friend. Lexa takes a deep breath, opening up the message app. There is a message thread at the beginning labeled, ‘Heda’s Houmon’ **(Commander’s Wife)**. Lexa lets out a shocked laugh, pressing her finger against the message to open it.

The message inside is a screen shot from what looks like Clarke’s phone if the contact info is anything to go by. Clarke has Lexa’s cell phone number saved under ‘Green-Eyed Beauty,’ which causes the brunette’s heart to speed up exponentially. The contents of the message cause the brunette to gasp, her chest clench painfully in what feels like the beginning of a panic attack. She drops the phone on the end table with a clunk.

  **Green-Eyed Beauty: (11:20 p.m.)** _I want to ask how your date went but I can’t muster up the courage. I am so incredibly jealous of Niylah. She gets to have all of you, all because she isn’t afraid. I wish that I wasn’t broken so that I could take you out on dates, hold your hand and kiss you goodnight. I’m so sorry that we can’t ever have those things, because together we would be amazing._

_BTW-I hate being your friend. Wait, no that came out wrong. I hate that I can only be your friend, because I want so much more. So I will continue to admire you from afar, and wish certain death upon anybody who gets to touch you when I can’t._

_Reshop, Skai Prisa._ **(Goodnight Sky Princess.)**

Lexa’s vision starts to blur and before she knows it, she has gotten to her feet, shakily pacing the length of the living room.

 _“Fuck!!”_ Lexa curses, tangling her fingers into unruly chestnut curls. _“What the fuck is that?”_

_“Well my dear that would be a text message that you drunkenly sent to one Clarke Griffin, Sky Princess last night.”_

_“No way.”_

_“Lexa. I am telling you the truth. I know that this is fucked up, but I wouldn’t make this up.”_

_“Fuck!! What am I going to do?”_ Lexa’s incessant pacing increases, her bare feet catching slightly on the carpeting, causing her to stumble. _“I can’t ever face her again.”_

_“Lex…”_

_“I can’t go to the café anymore.”_

_“Le…”_

_“I have to transfer schools.”_

_“Lexa..”_

_“We have to move to another state.”_

_“LEXA!!!!”_

Anya’s warm hand grips the brunette’s shoulder, stopping her instantly. Lexa’s bloodshot eyes are wide with panic, her bottom lip snared between her teeth. Her breaths are coming out in short pants, a slightly green pallor to her normally bronzed skin.

_“I can’t ever face her again.”_

_“Lexa, would you please shut the fuck up for one second! You promised that you wouldn’t freak out.”_

_“That was before I knew that I practically professed my love for Clarke over text message. While I was drunk!”_

_“If you would just stop for a second.”_

_“I need to go throw up.”_

Without another word Lexa bolts out of the living room with her hand clasped over her mouth. Anya pulls herself onto the couch, stretching her deliciously sore body out on the plush fabric. She can hear the muffled sounds of her best friend vomiting in the bathroom and it causes her to cringe. She’s not sure if it is from the hangover or the stress of the text message. The blonde grabs her phone from the table, the screen lighting up with a text message from Raven.

 **Rae Bae: (08:12 a.m.)** _How’d she take it?_

 **Ai Haiplana (My Queen): (08:12 a.m.)** _She’s throwing up right now._

 **Rae Bae: (08:12 a.m.)** _Ouch. Not good then?_

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:13 a.m.)** _No. Well I mean. We can probably attribute that to the fact that she got wasted last night._

 **Rae Bae: (08:13 a.m.)** _Yeah that might have had something to do with it._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:13 a.m.)** _Or it could be the fact that I didn’t tell her that we erased the message before Clarke could see it._

 **Rae Bae: (08:14 a.m.)** _WHAT!?!? Anya, what the hell??_

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:14 a.m.)** _I tried to tell her Raven. She was flipping the fuck out and wouldn’t let me get a word in edgewise._

 **Rae Bae: (08:14 a.m.)** _Well you need to tell her._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:15 a.m.)** _As soon as she gets out of the bathroom, I will tell her._

 **Rae Bae: (08:15 a.m.)** _Good. Don’t be a dick to your best friend. She’s already suffering enough right now._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:15 a.m.)** _It’s her own fault that she is suffering. I have told her multiple times that Clarke has the hots for her. I’m pretty sure that Clarke has told her. She’s being stubborn._

 **Rae Bae: (08:16 a.m.)** _Well I feel like she has a reason to be hesitant._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:16 a.m.)** _True, but for how long?_

 **Rae Bae: (08:16 a.m.)** _Everybody’s mourning time is different Anya. You can’t just push her to get over her last girlfriend, who died, need I remind you._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:17 a.m.)** _Ugh. You’re mouthy._

 **Rae Bae: (08:17 a.m.)** _You loved my mouth last night. And early this morning. ; )_

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:17 a.m.)** _Oh my god!_

 **Rae Bae: (08:18 a.m.)** _You said that a lot during our trysts._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:18 a.m.)** _Raven, be serious!_

 **Rae Bae: (08:18 a.m.)** _Who says that I’m not serious?_

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:19 a.m.)** _I can’t with you right now. It’s too early._

 **Rae Bae: (08:19 a.m.)** _Fine, just leave me here alone. I’ll just stay here in bed, naked and alone._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:19 a.m.)** _Ugh…that is NOT fair._

 **Rae Bae: (08:20 a.m.)** _You could always come back over and change that._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:20 a.m.)** _I wish. I would love nothing more than to come back over to your dorm and ravish you until you scream my name._

 **Rae Bae: (08:20 a.m.)** _Now who’s not playing fair?_

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:21 a.m.)** _You started it. We agreed that this needed to be brought to her attention. The sooner I get this over with, the sooner I can come back over there and make you come._

 **Rae Bae: (08:21 a.m.)** _J.C. Anya…Hurry up and finish talking to her so you can come and finish me. I don’t know how long I can wait. I might have to start without you._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:21 a.m.)** _Babe….please don’t. I need to concentrate so I can calm Lexa down and I won’t be able to help if I think about you touching yourself._

 **Rae Bae: (08:22 a.m.)** _Hurry up then. As soon as you are done calming down your best friend, come back over._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:22 a.m.)** _I will be there shorty. I need to sleep first because I’m exhausted Rae._

 **Rae Bae: (08:22 a.m.)** _We will sleep first. If you can behave._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:23 a.m.)** _You are the naughty one._

 **Rae Bae: (08:23 a.m.)** _Lies. You are. And it’s not my fault that you can’t keep your hands off of me._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:23 a.m.)** _I’m not going to deny it. You’re hot._

 **Rae Bae: (08:23 a.m.)** _Ditto Babe. Go take care of your best friend._

 **Ai Haiplana: (08:24 a.m.)** _Okay. I’ll see you in a little while._

 **Rae Bae: (08:24 a.m.)** _I can’t wait. ; )_

Anya huffs out a laugh as she sets her phone back on the table. Getting up from the couch, the blonde makes her way towards the bathroom. The door is slightly ajar but otherwise empty. Brows furrowed in confusion, Anya makes her way down the hall towards Lexa’s bedroom. The brunette is curled up in the fetal positon on her bed, an unfamiliar red hoodie concealing her face. Lexa’s hands are looped around her legs, pulling her knees against her chest. Her shoulders are shaking slightly, leading Anya to believe that the brunette may be crying. Worry floods her body, seeing as her best friend does not easily allow tears to fall. Anya takes a deep breath to steel her resolve before crawling in behind Lexa. She tucks her arm underneath Lexa’s arm, effectively wrapping the hand around her best friend’s waist. Lexa stiffens momentarily before relaxing, releasing her legs to tangle them with Anya’s.

 _“Lexa...”_ A soft sob escapes the brunette, making Anya’s heart clench painfully. _“It’s going to be okay, I promise.”_

 _“Noooo…”_ Lexa’s voice is husky with emotion as she croaks out her answer. _“It’s all fucked up now.”_

 _“Seriously, if you would’ve let me finish talking before you ran off,”_ Anya squeezes Lexa’s hip, _“turn around please.”_

Lexa slowly turn’s in Anya’s arms, coming face to face with her best friend. The brunette’s eyes are wet and tear stained, her bottom lip is snared between her teeth, reddened from the constant force of her biting it. Anya’s heart breaks completely as she takes in the brunette’s defeated state.

_“What do you want?”_

_“I need to finish telling you about last night.”_

_“I don’t want to know any more.”_

_“But you need to let me finish.”_

_“No. I don’t want to hear anymore, Anya.”_

_“Seriously. I’m not giving you a choice. You need to hear this.”_

Lexa sighs. _“Fine. Hurry up and get it over with.”_

Anya presses a soft kiss against Lexa’s forehead. _“God, you are so fucking stubborn. Clarke didn’t see the message.”_

Lexa tilts her head backwards slightly, meeting Anya’s eyes _. “What?”_

_“I said that Clarke never saw the text message. And she won’t get to see it.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“Raven deleted the message.”_

_“She did what?”_

_“She deleted the message. Look, Lexa. Raven and I know that you are harboring some feelings for Clarke that you aren’t willing to act upon. For whatever reason you have deemed appropriate. So it’s not fair for her or for you if she reads that message.”_

_“Thank you guys.”_

_“We did if for both of you. I am telling you Lexa, you need to figure your shit out. I know that you said that you can’t be anything but her friend so if that is the case, you need to stop with the longing gazes and lovey dovey text messages.”_

_“I know.”_

_“Because right now, I can’t even trust you to send her a text message without fucking it up. She’s trying to be happy, trying to date Niylah. So acting like a jealous girlfriend is not okay. If you want to take a chance with her, you need to tell her before it’s too late. If not, then you need to step back and let her live her life. You cannot pine over her anymore, or give her any false hope. All you can do is be what you promised her, a friend.”_

_“You’re right.”_ Lexa sniffles as she buries her face in her best friend’s neck.

_“You’re damn right I am.”_

Anya closes her eyes with a deep yawn. She wraps her best friend up in a tight embrace, running her hands up and down Lexa’s back in comfort.

**~*~*~*~*~***

The second time Lexa wakes up is in a much less painful way. Her hangover is still going strong and her face feels puffy from crying, but she is wrapped up in a tight embrace with Anya. The blonde is breathing softly against her cheek, the warm air rushing down her skin.

Her mind immediately beings assaulting her with flashbacks from her drunken night. Her futile attempt to try and enjoy Pulp Fiction. Her terrible decision to drink a whole bottle of wine when she can’t even remember the last time she had an alcoholic drink. Let alone allow herself to touch her phone in her inebriation. If not for Raven and Anya, Lexa would be in a whole different world of hurt this morning. The embarrassment of having to face Raven again is somewhat overwhelming in her current state and it makes her heart pound rapidly against her ribcage.

 _“I can feel you thinking, Lexa.”_ Anya’s voice is rough from sleep.

_“Sorry.”_

_“S’fine. What time is it?”_

_“I don’t know, I can’t move because you’re holding me like your life depends on it.”_

Anya untangles her body from Lexa’s, stretching her body out on the brunette’s bed.

_“Well excuse me for trying to comfort you while you were crying.”_

_“Ugh. Can we not get into this super emotional crap right now? I’m way too hungover for this shit right now.”_

_“Fine. But we have to talk about it eventually.”_

_“No we really don’t actually.”_

_“Oh yeah. Because that is a good idea. Not talking about unresolved feelings. Are you still fucking drunk?”_

_“No. I don’t ever want to drink again.”_

_“You say that now, but it isn’t going to happen.”_

_“Oh yes it is. Especially if I do stupid shit like I did last night.”_

_“Well you know what they say. A drunk mind speaks a sober heart.”_

_“Okay Socrates.”_

_“I highly doubt that Socrates said that.”_

_“Probably not. And you shouldn’t either.”_

_“What’s the matter, can’t handle the truth?”_

_“Fuck off.”_

_“God, you’re so hostile when you’re hungover.”_

_“Well too bad. You love me anyway.”_

_“True. Even though you’re a pain in my ass.”_

_“I love you too, Anya. Now get out of my bed and take a shower. You smell like sex and shame.”_

_“Oh honey, there was no shame involved in what I spent the night doing. It’s okay for you to be jealous.”_

_“Fuck you.”_

_“No thanks. My candy shop is reserved for one person.”_

_“Gross, dude. I can’t believe that you just called your vagina a candy shop.”_

Anya winks at her best friend, a boisterous laugh escaping her lips. _“You love it. Ladies love it.”_

_“I have no feelings towards or against your vagina.”_

Anya gets to her feet, making her way out of Lexa’s bedroom with a small wave. Lexa grunts as a particularly painful throb resonates in her skull. She turns to her side, spying her cell phone on her bedside table. She grabs the device to check her messages. She has no notifications, aside from some random game request on facebook. Lexa opens her text messages, pulling up her conversation thread with Clarke. She takes a deep breath before typing out a text message to the blonde.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:30 p.m.)** _Good afternoon Clarke. Sorry about my drunken text messages last night._

Lexa closes her eyes, embarrassment over her actions causing her cheeks to redden. Her text message notification pings a couple of minutes later.

 **Skai Prisa: (12:32 p.m.)** _Good afternoon Lexa. Don’t worry about it. It was actually quite comical to get your drunken commentary on Pulp Fiction._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:32 p.m.)** _Ugh. Please don’t remind me. My head is doing a good enough job of that._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:33 p.m.)** _That tends to happen when you consume an ungodly amount of alcohol._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:33 p.m.)** _I did not consume an ‘ungodly’ amount of alcohol._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:33 p.m.)** _How much did you drink?_

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:34 p.m.)** _I consumed one bottle of wine._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:34 p.m.)** _Well. I can see that getting you pretty wasted. Especially considering that I don’t think that you drink very often._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:35 p.m.)** _You would be correct in your consumption, Clarke._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:35 p.m.)** _So not that I am complaining at ALL, but to what do I owe the pleasure of your text message this afternoon?_

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:35 p.m.)** _I was wondering what your plans were for the rest of the day._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:36 p.m.)** _Well I get off of work at 2 and then my plans were to veg out and finish the paper that I have been putting off all week._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:36 p.m.)** _Oh, well that’s cool._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:36 p.m.)** _Why do you ask?_

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:37 p.m.)** _Well I was going to see if you wanted to hang out today._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:37 p.m.)** _Oh..well. I should really finish my paper. It’s due on Monday._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:37 p.m.)** _Oh, okay. I understand. I’m going to go make some pancakes so I’ll text you later._

Lexa sighs. Her desperation to hang out with the blonde enough to make her sick. Her phone chimes just as she is about to give up on her conversation.

 **Skai Prisa: (12:40 p.m.)** _Wait. I think that Raven said something about Anya coming over in a little bit. After walking in on them last night, I would like to be as far away from the two of them as I can. My eyes still burn from the amount of nudity that I saw from them. So…if you don’t mind me working on my paper for a little while, I would love to come over._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:41 p.m.)** _I mean if you’re sure, of course I would love to hang out. I can cash in on my part of the deal and make you watch a documentary._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:41 p.m.)** _If you must. But as soon as we have time, I am making you watch ‘Inglorious Basterds.’_

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:42 p.m.)** _That is part of the deal, I suppose._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:42 p.m.)** _Yes it is lol. I have to put my phone away, Indra is giving me dirty looks. I’m going to have to stop at home on the way so I will be over around 3._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:42 p.m.)** _See you in a little while Clarke._

Lexa drops her phone on the bed, pulling her body out of bed. She grabs some clothes out of her closet before making her way to the bathroom. Anya is standing in front of the bathroom mirror, wrapped in a towel while she blow dries her hair.

_“Hurry up, I need to shower.”_

_“What’s got your panties on fire, bitch?”_

_“Clarke is going to come over and hang out.”_

_“Um. Are you sure that is a good idea?”_

_“Yes. I want to hang out with her and she doesn’t want to see you and Raven bang again. So she’s going to come over and we’re going to work on homework.”_

_“If that isn’t code for a botty call, I don’t know what is.”_

_“Shof op, joka.”_ **(Shut up, fucker.)**

_“So testy today. Go wash the bitch off of you before your girlfriend comes over.”_

_“She’s not my girlfriend.”_

_“Sure, sure. Get your skanky ass in the shower.”_

Lexa flips her best friend off as she turns the tap on. Many years of friendship and Anya’s lack of personal space have left the brunette unable to be shy around her best friend. Anya turns her attention back to the mirror as Lexa strips out of her pajamas. She steps into the shower, sighing as the hot water runs down her sore body. She is halfway through shampooing her hair when Anya calls out to her again.

_“When did you get that red hoodie?”_

Lexa pokes her head out of the curtain, her hair soaped up with shampoo.

_“What?”_

_“I said, when did you get the red hoodie?”_

_“Um, I borrowed it.”_

_“From who? I don’t think that anybody that we know has that hoodie.”_

Lexa closes the curtain, shutting Anya out before mumbling, _“Clarke.”_

 _“I’m sorry,”_ Anya’s head pokes through the curtain, eliciting a squeal from Lexa, _“what did you say?”_

_“What the hell Anya? I’m naked!”_

_“I’ve seen it all before honey, plus I have the same equipment.”_

_“And that gives you the right to barge in on me in the shower?”_

_“Um. Because I am pretty sure that I heard you say that you are wearing Clarke’s hoodie.”_

_“That would be correct.”_

_“Lexa!!! Why do you have Clarke’s sweatshirt?”_

_“She let me borrow it yesterday when we went out for breakfast.”_

_“You went out for breakfast?!?!”_

_“Yeah. I couldn’t sleep on Thursday night because of your activities so I went for a run. I stopped at the café like I normally do. Clarke was there and she invited me out for breakfast. I didn’t want to go anywhere in my running clothes so she let me borrow her hoodie.”_

_“And you didn’t give it back?”_

_“Well we ended up staying at the diner way longer than originally intended and I had to run out on her in order to make it to class on time. I didn’t get to grab my book or my bag. I went to class in my yoga pants and a tank top. So I forgot that I had the hoodie and I took it. She hasn’t asked for it back so…”_

_“So you’re just going to keep it?”_

_“Maybe?”_

_“Lexa, that’s horrible.”_

_“I’ll give it back to her soon. Now can you please leave me alone so I can shower? You’re letting the heat out.”_

Anya sticks her tongue out. _“Fine. Party pooper.”_

_“Piss off.”_

_“Love you too babe.”_

The rest of Lexa’s shower goes by in peace. When Lexa leaves the bathroom dressed in a new set of yoga pants and a tank, (still in Clarke’s hoodie) Anya is nowhere to be found. Lexa checks Anya’s bedroom and even hers, but the blonde has apparently left the apartment. There is a sheet of paper resting on the kitchen island, Anya’s messy scrawl across it.

**-Went to Raven’s. Don’t wait up ; )**

_“Gross.”_

Lexa crumples up the paper, tossing it into the waste bin. She still has about an hour until Clarke comes over and she doesn’t really know what to do with herself until then. She doesn’t have any homework or papers that she needs to catch up on. With a resigned sigh, she makes the decision to catch up on her reading. She has a lot of case files that she has been skimming through this semester and she can never really be too prepared. Grabbing her phone and backpack out of her room, Lexa makes her way back into the living room. She makes a pit stop in the kitchen to stock up on water seeing as her body feels really dehydrated.

Getting comfortable on the couch, Lexa opens her laptop to turn on her favorite study playlist. Opting to go contactless today, she slides her glasses on as she cracks open her first casefile for next week.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke was not having the greatest day. After her unplanned walk-in on her best friend and girlfriend mid-coitus, she had been forced to hide in the communal shower until her water ran cold. The girls’ weren’t going at it when she got back to the dorm room, but they had many repeats throughout the night. After being woken up through the first one, she opted to put her headphones in to try and get some sleep before her café shift.

As it turns out, Raven and Anya have a lot of stamina. Raven also has a tendency to be ridiculously loud during her trysts with Anya. Clarke could hear the sounds of their love-making over her music. Needless to say, she didn’t get very much sleep. She wanted to text Octavia to see if she could spend the night in her dorm, but O’s roommate Ontari scared the crap out of Clarke. So instead she spent the night being woken up by gasps and moans that she definitely didn’t need to hear.

So by eight o’clock, she is ready to pass out on her feet. The café was extremely busy this Saturday morning and the second barista that was supposed to work with Clarke didn’t show up. So she was running the show by herself on about four hours of fitful sleep.

She’s lost count over how many shots of espresso she has downed since five a.m. The number probably falling somewhere between five and eight.

Clarke is pretty sure that she is either about to pass out or her heart is going to give out on her from the amount of caffeine that she has ingested. By lunch time, she is sure that she is on her deathbed. The traffic in the café hasn’t let up, but at least she has Octavia by her side to help. The two girls’ work in tandem, knocking out drinks almost as fast as they are ordered. The amount of running around that they are doing leaves them little time for chit chat, aside from compliments and short sentences.

Clarke’s phone rings with a text message at 12:30 p.m., her heart speeding up exponentially as she thinks about who could be texting her. Raven usually leaves her alone when she is at work and with her nocturnal activities, she is likely to be asleep still. Octavia is at work with her, leaving only two options. Niylah had been radio silent this morning, likely to be still asleep or maybe at work. Leading her to believe that her text message was from Lexa. Her suspicions being confirmed when she is able to check her phone a few minutes later.

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:30 p.m.)** _Good afternoon Clarke. Sorry about my drunken text messages last night._

Clarke barely manages to stifle a laugh, the thought of Lexa drunk texting her almost too much to even imagine.

 **Skai Prisa: (12:32 p.m.)** _Good afternoon Lexa. Don’t worry about it. It was actually quite comical to get your drunken commentary on Pulp Fiction._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:32 p.m**.) _Ugh. Please don’t remind me. My head is doing a good enough job of that._

The amount of sympathy that that single statement manages to make Clarke feel is all sorts of ridiculous. Her heartbeat flutters in her chest at the thought of Lexa hungover and in pain.

 **Skai Prisa: (12:33 p.m.)** _That tends to happen when you consume an ungodly amount of alcohol._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:33 p.m.)** _I did not consume an ‘ungodly’ amount of alcohol._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:33 p.m.)** _How much did you drink?_

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:34 p.m.)** _I consumed one bottle of wine._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:34 p.m.)** _Well. I can see that getting you pretty wasted. Especially considering that I don’t think that you drink very often._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:35 p.m.)** _You would be correct in your consumption, Clarke._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:35 p.m.)** _So not that I am complaining at ALL, but to what do I owe the pleasure of your text message this afternoon?_

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:35 p.m.)** _I was wondering what your plans were for the rest of the day._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:36 p.m.)** _Well I get off of work at 2 and then my plans were to veg out and finish the paper that I have been putting off all week._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:36 p.m.)** _Oh, well that’s cool._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:36 p.m.)** _Why do you ask?_

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:37 p.m.)** _Well I was going to see if you wanted to hang out today._

Clarke wants to hang out with Lexa, she really does. But at the same time, she knows that she has a paper to write that she has been putting off for the last week. She had every intention of completing the paper, but between working two jobs and spending time with Lexa and Niylah, she hasn’t had any free time.

 **Skai Prisa: (12:37 p.m.)** _Oh..well I should really finish my paper. It’s due on Monday._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:37 p.m.)** _Oh, okay. I understand. I’m going to go make some pancakes so I’ll text you later._

She doesn’t actually stand a chance of keeping her promise to herself on working on her paper. She can see Lexa pouting in her apartment, sad eyes glued to her cell phone.

Plus with the mention of having homemade pancakes, from Lexa, there is no way that she could say no. Pancakes have always been the blonde’s weakness, the fluffy flapjacks causing her mouth to water.

Being out of the dorm room is also a plus. Raven talked to her about Anya having to go home in the morning to take care of some things before spending the rest of the day with the brunette. Clarke’s pretty sure that ‘spending time’ is code for banging constantly. So she would have to be crazy to not only miss out on pancakes, she would be subject to listening to her best friend squeal for the better part of the day. She barely manages to suppress a shiver of disgust as her mind flashes back to last night.

 **Skai Prisa: (12:40 p.m.)** _Wait. I think that Raven said something about Anya coming over in a little bit. After walking in on them last night, I would like to be as far away from the two of them as I can. My eyes still burn from the amount of nudity that I saw from them. So…if you don’t mind me working on my paper for a little while, I would love to come over._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:41 p.m.)** _I mean if you’re sure, of course I would love to hang out. I can cash in on my part of the deal and make you watch a documentary._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:41 p.m.)** _If you must. But as soon as we have time, I am making you watch ‘Inglorious Basterds.’_

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:42 p.m.)** _That is part of the deal, I suppose._

 **Skai Prisa: (12:42 p.m.)** _Yes it is lol. I have to put my phone away, Indra is giving me dirty looks. I’m going to have to stop at home on the way so I will be over around 3._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (12:42 p.m.)** _See you in a little while Clarke._

_“Clarke. I am not paying you to play on your cell phone. You get off in just over an hour, can it not wait?”_

_“Sorry Indra.”_ Clarke puts her cell phone back into her apron, eyes downcast to avoid Indra’s disappointed ‘mom’ glare.

Clarke spends the rest of her shift filling orders and cleaning up the stockroom. She practically runs out of the café when the clock strikes two p.m., her excitement to see the brunette giving her a second wind. Clarke makes it to her dorm room in record time, almost flying through the front door. She manages to stop herself in record time, not willing to risk seeing either girl in any state of undress again. She knocks loudly on the slightly ajar door.

_“Are you assholes decent?”_

_“Not really but we’re covered up now.”_

_“Gross. It’s like the middle of the day.”_

_“Um, it is never too early for mind blowing sex.”_

_“Look Raven, I don’t have time for this. I just need to grab my backpack and something to change into.”_

_“Well hurry the fuck up, Clarke.”_

_“God Raven.”_

_“Well, I’m trying to get that reaction out of another woman but you are twatblocking me.”_

Clarke walks into the dorm room with her hand over her eyes.

_“Don’t be so dramatic, Princess.”_

_“It’s not my fault that you two are fucking like rabbits.”_

_“Have you seen this girl?”_

_“Yes. I have seen much more of her than I ever needed to. Now can I grab my shit so I can leave?”_

_“Hurry up.”_

Clarke keeps her eyes downcast so as not to burn anymore unwanted images into her brain. She quickly grabs her laptop and a change of clothes before shoving them into her backpack. She doesn’t chance a glance at her best friend, opting instead to yell, “No sex on my bed,” before closing the door behind her.

Pulling her cell phone out of her pocket, Clarke sends Lexa a quick message to let her know that she is on her way.

 **Skai Prisa: (02:20 p.m.)** _Hey. Just left my dorm room and I am mostly unscathed by the nudity. I will be there in about twenty minutes. Do I need to bring anything?_

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (02:21 p.m.)** _Raven and Anya are still going at it? And just bring yourself. I will get started on the pancakes now._

 **Skai Prisa: (02:21 p.m.)** _They haven’t stopped since they started. I need to invest in noise cancelling headphones or maybe soundproofing the bathroom so I can move in there._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (02:22 p.m.)** _That doesn’t sound very comfortable._

 **Skai Prisa: (02:22 p.m.)** _It has to be better than seeing my best friend’s naked body on top of your best friend’s._

 **Green-Eyed Beauty: (02:22 p.m.)** _Touché. I’ll see you in a bit. I’ll leave the door unlocked; just walk in when you get here._

Clarke tucks her phone back into her jeans, quickening her pace to get over to Lexa’s sooner. Before she realizes it, she is in front of Lexa’s apartment complex. For some reason that she can’t place her finger on, she is incredibly nervous. This might be the first time that she is going to be at Lexa’s apartment, but it’s not like they haven’t hung out alone before. Clarke knows that they isn’t a logical reason for her to feel nervous, she’s just hanging out with her friend. Granted this is the first time that she has had a crush on one of her friends.

Steeling her resolve, Clarke walks up to Lexa’s front door. She raises her hand to knock before remembering that Lexa told her to just walk in.

Walking into Lexa and Anya’s apartment is just what Clarke expected. The entire place is immaculately clean. Making her way into the living room is much the same as the entrance. There is not a thing out of place. They have a small black leather sectional in the corner. The only item out of place in the living room is a laptop that is sitting open on the arm of the couch. There is a pile of papers placed on top of the open laptop.

Clarke can hear Lexa humming softly from the kitchen so she drops her backpack onto the couch before heading towards the source of the sound. Lexa’s back is turned towards Clarke, her hips swaying as she hums along to the music that she is listening to. She is mixing what Clarke assumes is pancake batter in a bowl. The sensual way that the brunette’s hips are moving causes the blonde’s mouth to go dry. It takes everything in her not to walk up and wrap her arms around Lexa. She wants nothing more in this moment than to feel Lexa’s hips underneath her hands. Clarke wants to feel the muscles of Lexa’s abs clench under her soft exploration.

Licking her suddenly dry lips, Clarke ventures further into the kitchen. Closing the small amount of distance between them, Clarke gives into her desire to touch the brunette by placing her hand softly on one of Lexa’s hips. Lexa stiffens slightly but does not jump away. She turns to face the blonde with a smile on her face.

 _“Hey Clarke.”_ Lexa pops an earbud out of her ear.

The brunette’s current choice of attire makes Clarke suck in a deep breath. She barely manages to stifle a groan as she feels warmth spread through her belly. Lexa is dressed in a tight pair of black yoga pants and she is still wearing the red hoodie that she borrowed. Her hair is wrapped up in a messy bun and she has a pair of glasses perched on her face. She looks really tired, but also incredibly relaxed.

Clarke thinks that Lexa has never looked more beautiful than she does in this moment.

 _“Umm..Hey.”_ Clarke’s normally husky voice is laced with lust.

_“Are you hungry?”_

_“God yes.”_

Lexa’s soft laugh makes Clarke want to let out an obscene moan.

_“Well if you want to go sit down in the living room, I will bring you some pancakes in a minute.”_

_“Okay.”_

Clarke walks back into the living room, trying to quell the sudden onslaught of desire that she feels pooling in her core. This is not an acceptable feeling for her to have towards her friend. She knows that she should’ve just taken Raven’s advice and slept with Niylah last night. If nothing else, to get it out of her system.

The one thing that stopped Clarke from using Niylah to satisfy her more carnal desires is the fact that Clarke actually likes the brunette. She not currently helping Clarke get over her unrequited crush on Lexa. Truth is that Clarke hasn’t really given Niylah a chance.

**-Get your shit together Griffin. Head in the game.**

Clarke flops her body down on the couch, a content sigh leaving her lips at the feeling of sitting down for the first time. She digs in her backpack for her notebook and laptop, intent on getting started on her paper.

Her mind decides that it wants to lose all concentration on her doing any homework. It could be from her incredibly sexy friend that is currently making her pancakes. Or possibly the fact that her sketch of Lexa is framed and hanging in the living room. Clarke’s eyes widen at the realization of her sketch not only being framed, but hanging in such an open place for any of Lexa’s friends to see. She feels her heartbeat begin to quicken as a new rush of arousal hits her.

God she really needs to get her shit under control. Before she makes a huge mistake that she can’t come back from.

She’s still fighting her internal battle when Lexa walks into the living room holding two plates of pancakes with a huge grin on her face. The brunette sets the plates down on the living room table.

_“Would you like orange juice, milk, or water?”_

_“Um, juice would be awesome.”_

_“Alright.”_

_“Hey Lexie, what kind of pancakes did you make?”_

_“Um, they are Hawaiian pancakes. They have pineapples, coconut, and macadamia nuts in them.”_ Lexa replies as she walks back into the living room holding two glasses of juice. She sets the glasses on the table as she sits down next to Clarke.

Taking her first bite of pancakes releases a loud moan from Clarke that instantly makes her blush. Judging by the way Lexa squirms in her seat with her eyes on Clarke’s lips, she isn’t completely unaffected by the moan either.

_“These are really good Lexie.”_

_“Ttt..thanks.”_ Lexa’s eyes continue to watch Clarke’s mouth as she chews her bite of pancake.

_“Are you going to eat?”_

_“Oh. Um, yes.”_ Lexa clears her throat awkwardly, dropping her gaze from Clarke’s mouth. She grabs her plate off of the table, turning her attention to her food.

The two women eat in silence, the air around them charged with a palpable sexual tension. Clarke finishes her food first, taking her plate into the kitchen to escape the almost suffocating air. Setting her plate in the sink, Clarke takes a deep, steadying breath. Her hands grip the counter so tightly that her knuckles turn starkly white.

_“Are you alright, Clarke?”_

_“Hmmm?”_ Clarke lets go of her death grip on the counter, turning to face Lexa’s concerned gaze.

_“Are you okay?”_

_“Yes. I’m fine. Just tired.”_

_“You could’ve stayed home and took a nap instead.”_

_“Yeah. Too bad our best friends’ are trying to have some sort of sexmarathon. Plus I wanted to come over and hang out with you.”_

_“Well, I’m glad that you came over.”_ Lexa’s shy smile makes Clarke’s heart skip a beat.

_“Same here.”_

_“So. I have a documentary that I picked out for us to watch. If you want to work on your paper first, then we can watch it.”_

_“That sounds good to me.”_

_“Alright. Well I am going to clean up in here really quickly and then I will join you.”_

_“Okay.”_ Clarke leaves the kitchen, returning to her spot on the couch. She grabs her laptop off of the table, opening her mess of a word document.

The next two hours go by in a blur. At some point, Lexa came back into the living room, taking a seat on the opposite end of the couch. Clarke can hear her shuffling through her pile of papers that she had stacked on her laptop. The work in silence, the only sounds in the room are Clarke’s fingers hitting the keyboard and Lexa turning pages. When Clarke lets out a particularly loud yawn, she knows that she can’t focus on her paper anymore. Closing her laptop, she turns to ask Lexa about the documentary when her words suddenly die in her throat. Lexa is focused intently on her work, her mouth closed around the cap of a blue highlighter. Clarke can’t help but stare at the way Lexa’s lips curl around the plastic cap, biting down slightly on it as she concentrates. She groans inwardly, wondering how the brunette’s lips would feel against her own, or pressed against other parts of her body. The amount of envy that she feels towards that tiny plastic highlighter cap is ridiculous. Clarke clears her throat in an attempt to gain Lexa’s attention. Having Lexa’s forest green eyes lock on her face does nothing to quell the desire that she is feeling towards the brunette. Lexa’s face being framed by her thin rimmed glasses as she nibbles on the highlighter is almost Clarke’s undoing. The blonde’s very active imagination pictures her softly taking the glasses off of Lexa’s face and taking replacing the highlighter with her own mouth.

 _“Clarke?”_ Lexa’s soft whisper of her name breaks the blonde out of her daydream.

_“Hmm?”_

_“I asked if you were done with your paper?”_

_“No. I have the outline done and the rough draft planned out, but I can’t concentrate anymore.”_

_“Would you like to watch the documentary that I picked out?”_

_“As long as you didn’t pick out one of those ones that is going to make me afraid to eat McDonald’s ever again.”_

Lexa laughs airily as she tucks her legs under her body. _“I promise that I didn’t pick out one of those. Even though you should be afraid to eat at McDonald’s, Clarke. Do you know how bad that food is for you?”_

_“Um. No and I don’t care. I’m a college student that lives in a dorm. It’s not like I have the option of cooking in my room. Plus, they have delicious chicken nuggets.”_

_“Gross.”_

_“Hmm. I don’t eat there often. Plus, it’s not like I don’t exercise to get rid of the excess calories.”_

_“I guess that I can forgive you, just this once.”_

_“Thanks, boss.”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“So what documentary have you picked out for us this afternoon, Miss Woods?”_

_“I chose a discovery channel documentary on squids.”_

_“Wait, what? Squids?”_

_“Yes, squids.”_

_“Why?”_

Lexa shrugs. _“I just really love squids.”_

_“Okay. Squids. You’ve got it. Whenever you’re ready, Heda.”_

The way Clarke’s voice sounds calling Lexa ‘Heda’ sends a shiver through the brunette’s body.

_“What did you call me?”_

_“Heda?”_

_“Why?”_

_“I don’t know. I heard Anya call you that. I’m sorry. If it means something terrible, I won’t say it again.”_

_“No, it’s fine. I like the way that you say it.”_

_“Okay. Well Heda, if you would like to start the documentary, I am totally ready.”_

_“Right.”_

Lexa grabs her television remote, turning on the blu ray player to open up her Netflix. As soon as the app loads, she pulls up the documentary from her queue. She turns to look at Clarke, who is currently making herself more comfortable on the couch, stretching out her body across two cushions.

_“You ready?”_

_“Yup.”_

Lexa presses play on the blu ray player before settling back down on the couch. She sets her laptop and case files down on the floor as the title screen of the documentary begins to play.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Halfway through the documentary Lexa can hear soft snores coming from the blonde next to her. Clarke has curled her body into a little ball, her knees pressing into her chest. Her face is completely relaxed as she sleeps, her mouth set in a slight pout. Lexa has to fight back the urge to kiss the pout off of the blonde’s mouth. Lexa pulls the fleece blanket off of the top of the couch, draping it over Clarke’s sleeping form.

By the end of the film Lexa is fighting to stay awake. The heat and relaxation that she can feel radiating off of the other girl is making her eyes feel heavy.

She doesn’t want to sleep and miss out on seeing Clarke as she first wakes up. So she gets up from the couch to grab her guitar out of the corner of the living room.

She settles into the chair near her guitar stand. Lexa strums a few chords, turning a few knobs to tune the instrument. She glances once more at the sleeping blonde, taking a deep breath before beginning to play.

 _‘You don’t want me; no_  
You don’t need me  
Like I want you, oh  
Like I need you

_And I want you in my life  
And I need you in my life_

_You can’t see me, no_  
Like I see you  
I can’t have you, no  
Like you have me

_And I want you in my life  
And I need you in my life_

_Love_  
Love  
Love

 _You can’t feel me, no_  
Like I feel you  
I can’t steal you, no  
Like you stole me

_And I want you in my life  
And I need you in my life_

_La la la la  
La la la la_

_La la la la  
La la la la’_

_“That was beautiful Lexa.”_ Clarke’s sleep laden voice cuts through the last few chords of the song.

Lexa clears her throat, setting the guitar back onto the stand. She discreetly wipes her eyes, clearing away the tears that have gathered in her eyes.

_“Thanks.”_

_“Did you write that?”_

Lexa laughs softly, adjusting her glasses on her face. _“Oh I wish. I am not that talented.”_

_“Oh please. I wish that I could play the guitar and sing that well.”_

_“It wasn’t that great.”_ Lexa feels a blush spread across her cheeks.

 _“Whatever. It was so good. Where did you learn that song_?” Clarke questions, pulling her body into a sitting position on the couch.

_“I taught myself.”_

_“Did you? How long did it take?”_

_“Not very long. I’ve only been playing for like three or four weeks.”_

_“Really?”_

_“Yeah. I just decided one day that I wanted to learn. So I bought a guitar and watched a lot of youtube. And here I am.”_

_“Well it was beautiful.”_

_“Thank you.”_

_“What time is it?”_

_“It’s like six thirty I think.”_

_“Oh my gosh. I’ve been asleep for almost two hours.”_

_“Yeah. I figured that you were tired, so I let you sleep.”_

_“I appreciate it. I should probably get going here soon.”_

_“Yeah. You could go, or stay and have some dinner.”_

_“Maybe. Depends on what you plan on feeding me.”_

_“Feeding you twice in one day, Clarke? When will you be providing a meal for me?”_

_“Whenever you want. Name the time and the place.”_

_“I’ll just hold onto that I.O.U and cash it in on a later date. Now how does pizza sound?”_

_“Do you have any beer?”_

_“Probably. Anya drinks beer like it’s going out of style.”_

_“Then I am so down for some pizza.”_

_“What kind would you like?”_

_“Pepperoni and black olives is like my jam.”_

_“Pepperoni and black olives it is then.”_

_“Oh my god, I love you.”_

Lexa’s breath hitches in her throat. She so badly wants Clarke to say three words and mean them in a different context. She gets out of her chair, grabbing her phone off of the table.

_“I’ll order the pizza now. If you want, you can look for something to watch on Netflix.”_

_“Or you could play another song for me.”_

_“You’re so demanding.”_

_“You love it.”_

**-More than you could ever know.-**

_“I’ll be right back.”_

When Lexa comes back into the living room, Clarke has her sock clad feet resting on the living room table with a beer in her hand. She looks positively at home as she scrolls through Lexa’s Netflix queue looking for something to watch.

_“Pizza should be here in about thirty minutes.”_

_“Sweet. I shouldn’t be, but I’m super hungry.”_

_“Same here. I blame homework for that.”_

_“Yeah. It’s pretty draining, that’s for sure. What do you want to watch?”_

_“I don’t care. You can pick.”_

_“Have you watched Orange is the New Black?”_

_“No. I have heard good things about it, but I haven’t had time.”_

_“Oh dude! It’s such a good show. We are totally watching it.”_

_“That’s fine. I’m surprised that you aren’t making me watch your Tarantino film.”_

_“Oh I’m saving that one for a rainy day.”_

_“Okay. Well, I’m ready when you are.”_ Lexa drops down into her seat, propping her feet up on the table next to Clarke’s feet.

 _“Alrighty.”_ Clarke starts the first episode and sets the remote on the table. Her free hand comes back gripping another beer, handing it to the brunette. Lexa wants to deny the beer, her hangover still slightly present in the back of her head, but she already can’t say no to the blonde. She takes a sip of the ice cold beer, reveling in the bitter taste.

Halfway through the first episode have caused two things to happen to Lexa. She has chugged her beer in a record amount of time, finishing the beverage in the first five minutes of the episode. She is also so incredibly turned on right now that it’s actually uncomfortable. Squirming in place gives her no sort of relief, only serving to heighten her arousal. Had she known that she was going to be watching a show with lesbian sex with the girl that she is crushing on, she might’ve said no. She is really regretting her decision to let Clarke choose the show now. Clarke doesn’t look any less affected than Lexa, her cheeks are aflame in a deep blush and she is chewing on her bottom lip.

_“I wasn’t aware that you wanted to watch porn with me, Clarke.”_

_“Shut up! This is not porn.”_

_“Clarke, there was a lesbian sex scene five minutes into this episode.”_

_“There are really good stories, I swear. The sex is just a plus.”_

_“Really Clarke?”_

_“What? I can’t enjoy two attractive lady’s getting it on?”_

_“I can’t even with you. Would you like another beer?”_

_“Sure.”_

Lexa gets up to go grab round two, on her way back to the living room, the doorbell rings. Lexa hands Clarke the two beers before pulling open the door. Clarke hears the brunette exchange pleasantries with the delivery driver quickly as she signs the receipt. She shuts the front door, bringing the pizza into the living room.

_“Oh man, that smells really good.”_

_“Would you like a plate?”_

_“Nah. Don’t bother dirtying up the plates. We can just eat over the box.”_

_“Okay.”_

Lexa sets the now open pizza box on the couch between them. Clarke hands Lexa a beer as she grabs a slice of pizza.

The two women enjoy their pizza in silence, continuing to watch Orange is the New Black as they eat.

They are halfway through the third episode when Clarke’s phone rings. Clarke looks apologetically at Lexa before picking up her phone. She covers the receiver with her hand.

_“I’m sorry. I’ll only be a minute. Do you want me to step outside?”_

_“Not a problem, Clarke. You can take the call in my room if you want. It’s down the hall, first door on your left.”_

_“Thanks.”_

Clarke walks down the hall into Lexa’s bedroom. Lexa reaches over to grab the remote to pause the episode. She can hear Clarke’s soft voice in her room, speaking into her phone.

_“I’m sorry that I didn’t call you after I got off of work Niylah. I had to work on a paper that is due on Monday.”_

Lexa can feel a strong burst of jealousy as she hears Niylah’s name.

_“I know that we were going to go out to dinner, but I really had to get this paper done. I can come over now if you want.”_

Knowing that Clarke skipped her dinner date to come over warms Lexa’s heart. If she wasn’t already smitten with the blonde, that would’ve done it right there.

_“Okay. We could go out for breakfast or brunch tomorrow if you want. I can meet you at the diner across from Grounders at like nine if you want. I have to work tomorrow night at the bar and I have to finish my paper. Okay I’ll see you tomorrow. I can’t wait either. Goodnight Niylah.”_

Lexa feels another surge of jealous pass through her. Clarke is going out to breakfast at the same diner that she took Lexa to. She knows that she doesn’t have the right to be upset, but her heart seems to be making this decision. She’s sure that Clarke has taken other friends to the diner before, but for some reason Lexa felt special when the blonde took her. Like it was their own secret place. She sucks down the rest of her beer with a grunt, trying to quell her jealousy.

She has been completely unsuccessful by the time Clarke makes her way back into the living room.

_“Sorry about the interruption. I completely forgot that I was supposed to go to dinner with Niylah tonight.”_

_“It’s fine. Do you have to leave?”_

_“No. We made plans for tomorrow morning.”_

_“Okay. Do you want to finish this episode?”_

_“Yeah of course. Why? Are you kicking me out?”_

Lexa’s eyes widen in shock. _“No. Of course not.”_

_“Lexie. I’m totally kidding. We can keep watching if you want.”_

_“Of course I want to keep watching. I’m just going to grab another beer. Do you want one?”_

_“Sure. But this is the last one for me.”_

_“Okay.”_

Lexa makes her way back into the kitchen to grab the two beers. She is still simmering with jealousy, completely envious of Niylah. She grabs both of the beers and pops the caps. She feels like she needs a little something more to take the edge off, lest she act like a jealous girlfriend towards Clarke.

She remembers Anya telling her that they had some leftover tequila in the freezer. Grabbing a shot glass out of a cabinet, Lexa pulls the bottle out of the freezer. She pours herself a shot, tossing the drink back quickly. The burn of the liquor causes her to hiss softly. Before she can second guess her choice, Lexa pours and tosses back another shot. She chases the shot with a long pull of the beer.

Clarke is munching on a slice of the now cold pizza when Lexa walks back into the living room with the beer. The brunette hands the other beer over, sitting back down in her spot. She takes another pull of the beer as she presses play on the player. She begins to feel the pleasant warmth of the tequila as it flows through her body.

_“What do you think of the show, Lexie?”_

_“It’s not bad.”_

_“It is way better than not bad.”_

_“I like it just fine Clarke.”_

_“Ugh. You are so infuriating, Lexa.”_

_“Shh. I’m watching the show.”_

Truth be told, Lexa loves the show. She is addicted, hook, line and sinker by the fourth episode. She doesn’t know how many more episodes Clarke can make it through before passing out.

_“We can stop after this episode.”_

_“No. I’m good.”_

_“Clarke, you are practically falling asleep. If I keep you up much later, you won’t make it back home tonight.”_

_“I’ll be fine. Raven texted me when I was on the phone. She is going to pick me up at eleven when she drops Anya off.”_

_“Oh okay. So we should have enough time to finish this episode.”_

_“Yes ma’am. Start it up.”_

The girls sit silently through the fourth episode. Lexa polishes off her beer quickly, feeling the slight buzz running through her body. She snatches another slice of pizza out of the box, humming in contentment as she munches on it. Lexa finishes off the slice as the episode ends. Clarkes sits up slightly, stretching out her stiff limbs. Lexa watches the blonde as she stretches, taking in the way her back arches off of the couch.

She knows that Clarke is going home soon and she can’t help but feel really sad that their night is coming to an end.

_“I had a lot of fun with you today, Clarke. Thank you for coming over.”_

_“Oh don’t thank me. Thank you for inviting me. I had a blast.”_

_“We should hang out again soon.”_

_“Well duh. As soon as I have another day off, we can hang out again.”_

_“Sounds good to me.”_

_“Same.”_ Clarke looks over a Lexa with a smile. Her soft smile turns into a big grin as she looks at Lexa’s face. _“Lexie, you have a little bit of sauce on your cheek.”_

_“Where is it?”_

_“On your left cheek.”_

Lexa rubs furiously at her cheek, missing the sauce completely. _“Did I get it?”_

_“No. It’s still there.”_

The brunette runs her hand across her face again. _“How about now?”_

_“No. Here let me get it.”_

Clarke reaches over the couch and grabs Lexa’s chin with her hand. Her other hand follows to wipe the smear of sauce off of Lexa’s cheek. Pulling her hand away, Clarke slips the fingers that were just on Lexa’s cheek into her mouth, cleaning the sauce off of them.

Lexa sucks in a deep breath, her heart hammering against her ribcage. She sees Clarke’s pupils dilate as she sucks the sauce off of her fingers, letting out a soft groan as the sauce hits her tongue. Lexa’s nostrils flare as a sharp pang of arousal hits her right in the stomach, she bites back a moan.

 _“Got it.”_ Clarke says as she pulls her fingers out of her mouth with a ‘pop.’

Lexa regrets taking those shots now. Lexa’s liquid courage is making it nearly impossible for her to fight the desire to ravish the blonde.

_“So good. Mmmmm.”_

The look of desire swirling in Clarke’s eyes is too much for the brunette to handle in her buzzed state. Without so much as a second thought, Lexa slides her hand into Clarke’s blonde locks, gripping the back of her neck. She pulls Clarke’s face closer to hers, pressing their lips together firmly.

The first brush of their lips is even better than Lexa had imagined. Clarke’s lips are soft yet firm against her own. The blonde kisses her back without hesitation, her lips molding against Lexa’s. When Clarke lets out a small moan, Lexa deepens the kiss. Clarke lets the brunette’s tongue into her mouth eagerly, meeting her stroke for stroke with her own tongue. Lexa lets out a moan into Clarke’s mouth, the intensity of their kiss sending spikes of arousal through her core.

The kiss is everything that Lexa could want. She sees all of the cliché fireworks that she has heard about for her entire life. Her heart is beating faster, yet slower at the same time. Her senses are on overload, surrounded by everything that is Clarke. The blonde’s lips are sweet, her tongue mapping out Lexa’s mouth, memorizing every nook and cranny.

Lexa reluctantly breaks the kiss when air becomes a necessity, sucking in labored breaths through her mouth. Clarke is worse off than the brunette, panting harshly, her eyes screwed tightly shut. Her hands are clenched at her sides.

Lexa is floored by the blonde’s response to their kiss and too be honest, she is pretty wrecked herself.

She can’t help herself when she leans in to brush her lips against Clarke’s jawline. The blonde lets out a keening mewl, turning her head to offer the brunette more room to work. The taste of Clarke’s skin is almost as addicting as her lips, and Lexa is too far gone to stop herself.

The moan that Clarke lets out when Lexa presses a kiss to her pulse point is absolutely sinful and Lexa can’t help but moan against the blonde’s skin. The response eggs the brunette on, so she doesn’t think twice before she wraps her lips around the fluttering skin to suck on it. Another moan escapes the blonde’s lips as Lexa alternates between licking and nibbling on the flesh. A harsh bite elicits a hiss from the blonde and Lexa soothes the burn with her tongue. Clarke’s fingers pull Lexa’s hair out of her bun, gripping the wavy locks tightly.

She knows that she is going to leave a mark on Clarke’s neck, but she is addicted to the slightly salty tang of the blonde’s skin. Lexa has lost all control over her actions, each sharp tug on her hair being met with a sharp nip to Clarke’s neck.

The sound of the front door being unlocked causes the women to spring apart, both of them panting harshly.

Anya and Raven walk into the apartment laughing at something. They are oblivious to the extremely flushed women sitting on the couch.

_“Hey guys.”_

_“Oh! PIZZA!”_

Raven rushes past Clarke to snatch up the box of pizza. The brunette settles in the blonde’s lap, munching happily on a slice of cold pizza.

_“Rae, can we go? I am dead on my feet and I want to sleep.”_

Raven eyes her friend warily, eyes widening in shock when she spies the massive red mark that Clarke is currently sporting on her neck. Raven darts her eyes towards Anya, the dirty blonde smirking knowingly at her girlfriend.

_“Um, yeah sure. Whatever you want Princess.”_

Raven removes her body from her best friend’s lap, stumbling as Clarke bolts from the couch. The blonde barely stops to grab her shoes as she flees from the house.

_“So, I’m gonna go. I’ll text you later babe.”_

_“MMMkay.”_ Anya wraps her arms around Raven’s waist, pulling the shorter girl in for a chaste kiss. As soon as Raven pulls away, she leaves the apartment with a small wave to Lexa. Anya turns her attention to her still flustered best friend, with a knowing grin on her face. _“So….”_

 _“So, what?”_ Lexa keeps her gaze locked on her shaking hands, refusing to meet her best friend’s eyes.

_“Are you really going to make me ask?”_

_“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”_

_“Hmmm. So the massive hickey that Clarke is going to be sporting on her neck has nothing to do with you?”_

_“No.”_

_“What about the fact that your lips are definitely swollen like you have been making out with somebody?”_

_“That is not something that occurred this evening.”_

_“No? Okay, so why did Clarke run out of here like she was on fire? She didn’t even say goodbye.”_

_“She was tired. She has plans with her girlfriend in the morning.”_

Anya grabs a slice of pizza out of the box and takes a huge bite out it. She turns away from Lexa with a shrug.

_“I know you made out with her. She didn’t have that mark earlier and she came over here right after work. So you can deny it all you want, because I know the truth. I’m going to bed. Night.”_

Anya makes her way to her bedroom without another word and Lexa can hear the door as Anya shuts it behind her.

Lexa can still feel Clarke’s lips against hers, firm and insistent. She presses her hand against her lips, reveling in the tingle that she feels.

She should be panicking about the kiss, because that was definitely not normal behavior for friends. But she can’t bring herself to regret it. Kissing Clarke was like coming up for air after being underwater for an extended amount of time. Like Lexa was just running out of air, about to drown, and pressing her lips against the blonde’s was like gasping in that first breath after surfacing. Painful but so rewarding. Lexa didn’t know what it felt like to be alive until she felt Clarke’s soft lips moving against her own.

The air had been thick with sexual tension the entire time that Clarke had been over. Lexa felt like she was doing a pretty good job of ignoring it, until Clarke wiped that damned pizza sauce off of her face. The blonde knew what she was doing when she stuck her fingers in her mouth to clean them and Lexa fell right into the trap. She couldn’t deny the pull that the blonde had on her any longer. So she kissed her. Lexa ‘Love is weakness’ Woods made the first move and kissed Clarke. She not only kissed the blonde, she left a mark on her neck. A mark that Niylah will most likely see in the morning. A mark that signifies possession, that Lexa left on Clarke’s neck.

Does she regret kissing Clarke? She wants to, so badly. Her moment of weakness is bound to make things even more awkward between them. For the life of her, Lexa can’t bring herself to regret one second of the kiss. If this is the only time that she gets to kiss the blonde, then she is going to savor it for the rest of her life.

Right now, she just wants to go to bed. She doesn’t know what awkwardness tomorrow is going to bring, so she might as well get all of the rest that she can to better deal with it.

As it turns out, sleep was not going to come easily for Lexa. She could not stop thinking about Clarke’s soft mouth against her own. Lexa may have been the initiator of said kiss, but Clarke was an actively enthusiastic participant. She has been lying in her bed for the past two hours, reliving every second of their heated exchange.

The more time that Lexa spends reliving the kiss, the more her body responds in kind. She was already having a hard time keeping her arousal on lockdown being around Clarke, the blonde eliciting responses from Lexa’s body that she hadn’t felt in years.

 Needless to say, kissing Clarke had left Lexa a horny, wanton mess. She had tried unsuccessfully to quell this desire that she had been plagued with all night, but relief was seemingly out of reach.

Unless, she decides to take matters into her own hands.

Lexa is no stranger to masturbation. She hasn’t had any sort of relationship since Costia died, including any one night stands. She’s only human, so she has become much more acquainted with her own body in the past three years then she would like to admit.

She knows that it is wrong for her to touch herself to thoughts of her friend, but she already crossed one friendship line tonight, what’s one more?

Lexa runs her hand softly down her exposed stomach, short nails raking the flesh. Her very active imagination pictures Clarke’s hand running down the taut flesh.

Her back arches slightly off of the bed when she dips her hand under the waistband of her yoga pants and her ruined panties. She is uncomfortably turned on right now, her arousal slick against the apex of her thighs.

The first exploratory press of fingers against her swollen clit elicits a guttural moan from her lips. She is so incredibly wet right now and she knows that it won’t take much to send her hurtling over the edge.

Lexa pictures Clarke’s lips against her own, pressing hot kisses to every inch of exposed skin as she descends the brunette’s body

A desperate whine leaves Lexa’s mouth as her swirls a tight circle against her bundle of nerves. She slides her fingers through her slick folds, index finger teasing her entrance. She can still hear Clarke’s keening moans as Lexa marked her skin. She lets out a moan of her own as she thrusts her index finger deep inside of her tight walls.

_“Fuck.”_

Her back arches off of the bed, as she presses harder against her probing finger. Curling her finger against the soft, spongy front wall, she lets out a loud moan. On her next thrust, Lexa adds another finger, biting her lip to stile a groan.

Lexa thinks about Clarke’s long, dainty fingers as they slide out of her mouth, wet from the blonde’s saliva. She imagines those same fingers replacing her own, thrusting deep inside of her.

The mental image of Clarke fingering her sends her dangerously close to the edge, her breaths coming out in soft pants. A light sheen of sweat is glistening on her body, the salty smell mixing with the scent of sex in the air. Feeling her walls clench tightly, Lexa knows that she is close. Speeding up her ministrations, the brunette presses her thumb against her clit.

Lexa thinks about the mark that she has left on Clarke’s neck. Her lips and teeth bruising the skin in a moment of unadulterated passion. The idea of Niylah seeing Lexa’s teeth marks on Clarke’s neck quelling her incessant jealousy. She’s knows that she’s being petty but she can’t help but feel slightly pleased with herself at the idea of Niylah being jealous.

The soft moans that Clarke made when Lexa pressed her teeth against the blonde’s wildly fluttering pulse point is the straw that breaks the camel’s back, tipping the brunette over the edge. She barely manages to stifle a scream as her release floods over her, as her inner walls pulse against her fingers.

Slowing her ministrations, Lexa continues to thrust and curl her fingers, riding out her orgasm. The tiny aftershocks sending shivers down her spine. One last deep thrust sends the brunette over the edge again, a smaller but just as powerful orgasm stealing her breath away.

As soon as the aftershocks subside, Lexa removes her fingers, immediately missing the sensation of being full.

Her body feels sluggish but sated. Completely spent but energized. She feels her eyelids fluttering, the desire to sleep at the front of her mind. Her last thought before she gives into the call of slumber is, ‘how much more awkward could her friendship with Clarke get?’

 

**-TBC-**

**Well, there it is lovelies. I hope that this chapter was an enjoyable one because I had a hell of a time writing it. I’m just really easily distracted. Please let me know what you thought about this update. It feeds my desire to write when you guys demand updates. Until next time Awesome Nerds.**

 


	7. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -Filler chapter  
> -Some plot but not really.  
> -Ranya has a lot of sex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Alright lovely humans, here is your next update. Let me just tell you, this one was a doozy to write. I blame all of the smut on one person, because she is the one that suggested it to me. So a few things about this chapter.
> 
> 1-It’s a filler chapter. Not much storyline going on right now.
> 
> 2-Niylah is in this chapter. I know that a lot of you don’t like her, but I don’t plan on having her around for much longer. Just be patient and stick with me, I will make it worth your while
> 
> 3-This chapter is pretty heavy on the Ranya. Clarke and Lexa are in it, but they have no interaction. They will in the next chapter, I promise.
> 
> 4-While we are speaking of Ranya, this chapter is pretty smutty. So enjoy, you sinners.
> 
> Feel free to leave me a comment on here or stalk me on tumblr @jeffrinamichelle to let me know that you thought.
> 
> Enjoy!

**~Barista’s Choice~**

 

**-Chapter 6-**

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“So?”_

_“So what?”_

_“Clarke.”_ Raven turns to face her best friend outside of Lexa and Anya’s apartment door. She places her hands on her hips, eyeing the blonde warily. _“Do I really need to say it?”_

_“I’m not sure what you mean.”_

_“Jesus Christ. You are just as stubborn as Lexa.”_ Raven scoffs softly as she watches Clarke roll her eyes. She lets her eyes roam over her friend’s face, taking in her flustered state. Clarke’s hair is slightly mussed and her cheeks are burning with a bright red blush. Her blue eyes are darkened, pupils blown wide and her lips are swollen. As if the massive hickey on her neck wasn’t enough of a clue that something big happened between her best friend and Lexa. _“Are you going to tell me what happened?”_

_“What happened when?”_

_“Okay. Princess. I am about two seconds away from shoving my foot up your ass.”_

_“That’s just rude.”_

_“Oh is it? But avoiding talking about the massive bruise on your neck isn’t? You didn’t have that mark earlier. And Clarke, I know that you are really bad at doing housework, but even you know that you are supposed to vacuum the floor and not stick the hose to your skin. So that leads me to believe that a certain brunette bombshell that lives about five feet away might be responsible for the current state of your skin.”_

_“Okay. So maybe we kissed.”_

_“I wouldn’t say that there is a maybe about it.”_

_“Okay, so she kissed me. But I definitely started it.”_

_“What do you mean, you started it?”_

_“Look. I don’t really want to talk about it right outside their door. Can we walk home and talk about it on the way?”_

_“Sure. Lead the way, Princess.”_

The walk home is awkward to say the least. Clarke makes sure to keep at least ten steps ahead of Raven, the brunette stumbling to try and keep up. The normal twenty minute walk that it takes them to get on campus to their dorm takes only fifteen. Raven is pretty sure that her knee is about to fall off by the time they reach their door. Her brace is digging painfully into her now swollen skin and her entire leg is numb.

By the time Raven stumbles into the room, she is so exhausted that she can barely think straight. She flops onto her bed, sighing as the pressure leaves her knee. Clarke immediately takes solace in the bathroom, closing the door behind her. Raven relaxes in her bed, opening her game of Tap Titans as she waits for her friend to reappear.

Raven’s tapped her way through forty levels before Clarke comes out of the bathroom, running a towel through her freshly washed hair. She has another towel wrapped around her still wet body. The blonde stops in front of her dresser, grabbing a pair of pajamas out of a drawer. She dresses quickly before joining Raven in her bed.

 _“Ready to talk, Princess?”_ Raven questions, her attention still focused on her game.

_“That depends. Do we have any alcohol?”_

_“I always have moonshine handy.”_

_“Ugh. We’re not eighteen anymore Raven.”_

_“I know. But Monty gives it to me for free, and I’m still a poor college student. Plus, it’s strong.”_

Clarke groans. _“Fine. Where is it?”_

_“Under the bed.”_

Clarke leans her body over the bed, reaching blindly underneath. She fumbles around before pulling a non-descript black box out. She eyes the box warily before bringing it up onto the bed. Raven glances over at her friend, her eyes widening in horror as she notices the box that Clarke is holding.

_“Nope. That’s not it.”_

_“What’s in this box?”_

_“Um…”_

Clarke’s curiosity gets the better of her so she opens the lid to the box. Heat floods her cheeks as she spies what exactly is nestled inside of the box. She snaps the lid shut quickly, tucking the box back under the bed.

_“So.”_

_“So?”_

_“You own a strap on?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Why not?”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Yeah. So we’re not going to make this awkward.”_ Raven takes her attention away from her phone, meeting Clarke’s eyes. _“I own a strap on. It’s brand new. I just bought it. No it hasn’t been used yet. Any other questions, Princess?”_

_“I didn’t ask any of those questions. Well, aside from the first one.”_

_“You were thinking them. I could see it in your eyes.”_

_“I think that I want to be done with this conversation now. Where’s the moonshine?”_

_“It’s under there. It’s just not in a box.”_

_“Okay.”_ Clarke pulls half of her body over the bed, her head peeking underneath. The jar of moonshine is a couple of inches away from the box that shall not be named. She grabs the clear mason jar before sitting back up. She wastes no time in opening the jar, taking a generous drink of the room temperature beverage. Swallowing the harsh liquor causes the blonde to let out a loud cough, her throat burning at the intrusion.

_“Jesus, fuck.”_

_“It’s not that bad, Clarke.”_

_“It’s like drinking nail polish remover.”_

_“Maybe. But it gets the job done.”_

_“That’s true.”_

Raven sets her phone down on the bedside table, turning her attention to her best friend. _“So, let’s talk about the giant hickey in the room.”_

_“Jeez, you just want to get right to the point, don’t you?”_

_“Yes. I don’t feel like wasting time. It’s late and I have to work on my final tomorrow.”_

_“But tomorrow is Sunday.”_

_“Yeah, but you know. Victory stands on the back of sacrifice and all that.”_

_“You’re working in wiring in a house.”_

_“Bitch. That’s hard work. If I fuck something up, it could mean the house burning down.”_

_“That’s true.”_

_“Now, give me the alcohol and tell me about that hickey.”_

_“Ugh, fine.”_ Clarke hands the mason jar over to Raven, after taking another swallow, of course. _“Damn. I don’t know where you want me to start.”_

 _“Um, how about the beginning.”_ Raven says as she takes a swig of the moonshine.

_“Okay. Well she told me just to walk in when I got to the apartment. So when I walked in she was in the kitchen making pancakes. She was wearing a really tight pair of yoga pants and my red Stanford hoodie. She had her hair up in a messy bun and she was wearing glasses. Glasses Rae!”_

_“And?”_

_“And? She looked fucking hot Raven! That’s what. She looked so fucking hot, and she is still wearing my jacket.”_

_“You’ve got it bad, Griffin.”_

_“Shut up.”_

Raven shrugs as she takes another drink of the moonshine. _“I’m just speaking the truth, Clarkie.”_

_“So anyway. We had pancakes, which were delicious by the way. I let out a pretty ridiculous sex moan when I took my first bite. And she watched my lips the whole time. It was pretty weird. So we got ready to watch this documentary on squids after eating.”_

_“Squids?”_

_“Don’t ask. Lexa loves squids.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“I fell asleep half way through the film. Lexa let me sleep for a little while. I think that she even covered me up at some point. When I woke up, she was singing a song while playing the guitar. It was the most beautiful thing that I have ever heard.”_

_“What song was she playing?”_

_“I think that she said it was a song by The Pretty Reckless. It’s called ‘You’ I think.”_

_“Oh yeah, I’ve heard that song. It’s super mushy.”_

_“It was super sweet. And I almost felt like she was singing to me.”_

_“That’s so disgustingly cute that it makes me want to vomit.”_

_“Shut up. So we talked about the song which turned into a conversation about dinner. She ordered pizza and told me to pick something for us to watch on Netflix. I found out that she hadn’t watched Orange is the New Black, so I chose that. Probably was not a good idea to choose that show.”_

_“Yeah, probably not. The sexual tension between you two is so strong that it makes my lady bits feel weird.”_

 Clarke grabs the jar, taking a sip of the drink. The slight numbness to her tongue allows her to swallow without a grimace this time. She sighs as she feels the warmth of the alcohol flow throughout her body. _“Gross, Raven.”_

_“Well it’s true. Continue, my dear.”_

_“So we watched the show while we ate the food. At one point she commented that I was making her watch porn. But other than that, it was pretty normal. We watched four episodes before with like twenty minutes to spare until you came to grab me.”_

_“This all sounds very tame. I don’t understand what led to mechahickey.”_

_“I’m getting there.”_

_“Okay jeez.”_

_“So Lexa ate a piece of pizza while we were watching the fourth episode. She had some sauce on her cheek. I told her about it and she tried to wipe it off, unsuccessfully might I add. After two failed attempts, I told her that I would get it. I wiped the sauce off of her face.”_

_“And you put your fingers in your mouth, didn’t you?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Oh my god, you hussy. No wonder she made a feast of your neck. I’m surprised that she didn’t fuck you on the couch.”_

_“It probably would’ve happened, had you and Anya not barged in.”_

_“Oh. I’m sorry that we twatblocked you.”_

_“Don’t be. Things are already really awkward between us. If we had sex, I’d probably never be able to look her in the eye.”_

_“Bullshit Clarke.”_ Raven takes another swig of the moonshine, reveling in the warn feeling flowing through her body. _“You can’t tell me that you don’t want to fuck her.”_

_“I never said that. But the problem isn’t that I don’t want it. The problem is that I want so much more. I want everything with her Rae. And it’s killing me because first she tells me what we can only be friends. Then she goes and pulls a stunt like this and it’s fucking with my head.”_

_“Oh, Princess. I’m sorry.”_

_“It’s not your fault. I just don’t know what to do about it.”_

Raven sets the jar down on her bedside table. She wraps her arms around Clarke’s shoulders to pull her in to a tight hug.

_“I say give her time. She’ll come around eventually.”_

_“I hope so.”_

_“She will. I promise. Now I don’t mind if you want to cuddle tonight, but we need to go to bed. I need to be well rested for the morning.”_

_“I’m going to sleep with you.”_

_“I thought that you would want to. Get under the covers Princess.”_

The two girls slide under the covers, settling into Raven’s bed. Clarke turns on her side, allowing her best friend to spoon her.

_“Night Princess.”_

_“Good night Rae.”_

Raven closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. The room is silent for an extended amount of time, leading the brunette to believe that Clarke has fallen asleep. She’s halfway to dreamland herself when Clarke’s voice breaks the silence.

_“Hey Rae?”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“Can we name the strap on?”_

_“Oh my god Clarke, go to sleep.”_

_“How about we call it The Mechanic?”_

_“GOODNIGHT CLARKE!”_

_“Oh…we could call it the Slave Cylinder.”_

_“That’s not a real thing.”_

_“Yes it is. It’s a part on a car.”_

_“How do you even know that?”_

_“My dad worked on cars. I used to help him.”_

_“Oh. Well we are not naming the strap on. And if you don’t go to sleep, I’m throwing your ass on the floor.”_

_“God, you’re so hostile. You would think that you be nicer with all of the sex you’ve been having. Maybe you should use the Slave Cylinder soon.”_

_“Go the FUCK to sleep, Clarke.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

When Raven wakes up to her alarm in the morning, she still has her body wrapped around Clarke. The blonde is snoring softly, her body completely relaxed in her slumber. Looking her over, Raven shakes her head at the purple marks decorating her best friend’s neck. They are surrounding a large, dark hickey that stands out against Clarke’s pale skin.

Raven wants nothing more than to stay cuddled up in her bed all day. If this project didn’t account for forty percent of her final grade, she might’ve actually gone back to sleep. Because honestly, the idea of being up at seven a.m. on a Sunday makes her want to vomit.

Alas, she isn’t that lucky, so she reluctantly pulls her sore body out of bed, careful not to wake Clarke up. She skips showering this morning, since she’s going to be stuck out in the sun all day. Plus, she did take a shower with Anya last night before taking her home. She pulls on a clean pair of jeans and a thin long-sleeved shirt. She pulls on her favorite fitted red parka vest. It takes the brunette a few minutes to tighten her brace around her still swollen knee. She grabs her tool belt from her closet before lacing up her work boots. She mumbles a quick good bye to Clarke before leaving the dorm, the blonde grumbling something unintelligible in her sleep.

The cold breeze feels good against the brunette’s sweaty skin. The morning was cold but the early afternoon has brought out the harsh heat of the sun. That coupled with being stuck inside the almost complete house has the brunette wishing that she had worn shorts and a tank top instead. Whoever thought it would be a good idea to have a mechanical engineering major wiring a Habitat for Humanity house is the world’s biggest douche bag.

When Miller pokes his head inside of the house to let Raven know that she has a guest, she breathes a sigh of relief. She would do just about anything to take a break about now.

She half expected to see Clarke standing outside waiting for her, holding a takeout bag from Ray’s. So she is pleasantly surprised to see Anya standing outside of the house holding a styrofoam container. Raven immediately wraps her arms around Anya’s waist, breathing the other girl in.

_“God I missed you.”_

Raven pulls out of the embrace to press a soft kiss to Anya’s lips.

_“You saw me like eleven hours ago.”_

_“That’s way too long, Anya.”_

_“I brought you a panini from Axe and Palm.”_

_“Marry me.”_ Raven presses another kiss firmly on her girlfriend’s lips.

_“It’s a little bit too soon for that Reyes.”_

_“Shut up and feed me.”_

_“Such a charmer.”_

The two women take a seat at the picnic table that is set up by the house. They eat in companionable silence, Raven scarfing down her panini quickly. Anya watches her in amusement, taking dainty bites of her own sandwich.

_“Hungry babe?”_

_“Shut up. I haven’t eaten today and I’ve been working my ass off since eight o’clock this morning.”_

_“I’m not making fun of you. I was just asking.”_

_“Thank you for bringing me lunch baby.”_

_“You’re welcome.”_

_“So did you talk to Lexa?”_

_“I tried to talk to her last night, but she wouldn’t crack.”_

_“You should’ve given her liquor. I gave Clarke some moonshine and she cracked immediately.”_

_“So?”_

_“So what?”_

_“What happened with them last night?”_

_“Did you not see Clarke’s neck?”_

_“Yeah. I would have to be blind to miss that massive hickey.”_

_“True. Well, apparently Clarke really likes it when Lexa wears her glasses.”_

_“Hmmm. I’ll have to let Lexa know.”_

_“Yeah. You should definitely do that. So they had pizza together and watched Orange is the New Black. After four episodes, it was almost time for me to drop you off. Lexa had some sauce on her face and she couldn’t get it off. Clarke wiped the sauce off of Lexa’s face and sucked her finger clean. After that they sucked face and apparently neck until we interrupted.”_

_“Jesus. Those two have got to get their shit together. The sexual tension is fucking ridiculous._

_“You’re telling me.”_

_“I don’t know how much more I can handle.”_

_“I’m pretty sure that they are close to their breaking points.”_

_“God I hope so.”_ Anya takes another bite of her panini, eyes widening as s thought crosses her mind. _“Oh! I have something to tell you about last night.”_

_“Go on.”_

_“So last night after you guys left, I tried to talk to Lexa.”_

_“You said that already.”_

_“Wait. It gets better. So our conversation did not go over well. Lexa was being her normal, ‘in denial’ self and she still wouldn’t admit to having feeling for Clarke or kissing her. So after we got into it, I went to bed. Lexa roamed around the house for a bit before going into her room.”_

_“Oh man. This is going to be good, I can tell.”_

_“Shut up. So our walls are pretty thin. So I could hear her rolling around in bed for a bit. I thought that she was just trying to get comfortable or maybe she was asleep and just moving a lot. Then the noises started.”_

Raven’s eyes widen in realization.

_“No.”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Oh my god! So she…”_

_“Yup.”_

_“You’re joking.”_

_“I’m not.”_

_“Holy shit. So Lexa flicked her bean after hanging out with Clarke?”_

_“Yes. I’m pretty sure that she used Clarke as masturbatory material. I mean, she said Clarke’s name a lot in the throes of her self-induced passion.”_

_“Oh my…I can’t even.”_

_“This is out of control.”_

_“You’re telling me.”_

_“I don’t know how much longer this will last before they break and fuck each other’s brains out.”_

_“I hope that is happens soon. Their sexual tension is making me perpetually horny._

_“Me too.”_ Raven grabs Anya’s sandwich out of the container to steal a bite. _“Now hurry up and finish eating so I can show you around the house.”_

_“So bossy. It must be the tool belt.”_

_“What does that have to do with anything?”_

_“Does it matter? You look really fucking hot wearing it. And that vest is doing it for me.”_

_“God, you’re insatiable.”_

_“It’s not my fault that you’re crazy hot.”_

_“Speak for yourself.”_

Anya finishes the last couple of bites of her sandwich, hastily chewing it down. She grabs Raven’s hand, pulling the brunette to her feet. Raven stumbles slightly at the force. Anya tosses the styrofoam container into the trash can before dragging Raven into the house.

_“We have about four weeks of work left before the house is done.”_

_“Raven. I don’t care about the house.”_

_“What? Why?”_

_“Because all I can think about is fucking you right now.”_

_“Jesus An.”_

_“I don’t know if it’s the tool belt of the vest, but all I want is to make you scream my name.”_

_“Fuck.”_ Raven bites back a moan. She grips Anya’s hand tightly, pulling her down the hall into the first bathroom. She closes the door behind them, turning the lock just in case. She turns around quickly, slamming her lips into her girlfriend’s. Raven swallows Anya’s moan, biting down on her girlfriend’s bottom lip. Raven breaks the kiss, lips attaching to Anya’s neck as she slams her back into the bathroom wall.

 _“Fuck Rae.”_ Anya moans as she reaches up to slide down the zipper of Raven’s vest. Raven pulls her arms out of the vest, tossing the fabric blindly to the ground. Anya’s short fingernails slide up Raven’s long sleeved shirt, stopping as soon as they reach the brunette’s breasts. Anya kneads her girlfriend’s breasts, fingers pinching at the girl’s sensitive nipples. Raven moans against Anya’s neck, teeth nipping at the wildly fluttering pulse.

A particularly hard pinch makes Raven pull away from Anya’s neck with a loud moan. Anya switches their positions, slamming Raven into the wall. She reattaches their lips, slipping her tongue into her girlfriend’s mouth as she presses their bodies flush together. She unclasps the tool belt, letting it fall to the floor with a clank.

Raven’s head is a fog of lust, short circuiting with every stroke of her girlfriend’s tongue. She grips the older woman’s hips in an attempt to pull her impossibly closer. Anya moans into Raven’s mouth as short fingernails dig into her hips almost painfully. The mixture of pleasure and pain sends a jolt of arousal down to Anya’s core. The blonde tears her lips away from her girlfriend’s, fingers curling under the hem of Raven’s shirt. The brunette lets out a yelp as the shift is pulled unceremoniously over her head. Anya drops the shirt to the floor before attaching her lips to Raven’s neck with intense eagerness. She sucks and nips at the flesh, soothing the burn with her tongue. Raven’s fingers find purchase in Anya’s blonde locks, pressing her girlfriend’s face deeper into her neck.

Anya’s hot mouth pulls away from Raven’s neck, her eager tongue sliding down her girlfriend’s heated skin. She focuses her attention on Raven’s delectable collarbones, sucking the sun-kissed flesh until it reddens.

_“Fuck babe, please.”_

_“Please what?”_ Anya’s hands unclasp Raven’s bra, moving up to slide under the straps of Raven’s bra, pulling the fabric off of her body. She presses soft kisses to the newly exposed flesh, swirling her tongue around her girlfriend’s nipple. Raven’s back arches off of the wall as Anya’s suckles the nipple into her mouth. The warmth of Anya’s mouth around her nipple coaxes a loud moan out of the brunette.

_“Jesus. You know.”_

_“I want to hear you say it.”_ Anya’s slightly muffled response ends with a sharp nip to the sensitive bud. She brings a hand up to grasp at the neglected breast, kneading the soft flesh. Her mouth returns to its original place, teeth scraping against Raven’s nipple as her fingers pull and pinch at the other one.

 _“Fuck…”_ Raven moans out, pressing her chest harder against her girlfriend’s mouth. _“Please, fuck me already. I need you inside of me.”_

Anya lets out a feral growl, biting down firmly on the puckered bud. Her free hand slides down Raven’s taut abdomen, scraping her nails across the rippling muscle. Anya’s nimble fingers unbutton Raven’s jeans as the brunette assists in tugging the tight denim down to her brace. Without breaking stride, Anya’s hand cups Raven’s core, fingers ghosting across the soaked fabric of the brunette’s underwear.

_“Fuck. Baby, you’re so wet.”_

Raven’s mind is completely overtaken in the sensations, her mouth unable to form any words. The only thing she can manage is a loud groan as she tangles a hand into Anya’s hair to tug at the soft locks. Anya pulls her attention away from Raven’s breast, allowing the brunette to guide her face back up. Raven’s lips seek out Anya’s, the two of them meeting in a heated kiss. Raven immediately dominates the kiss, thrusting her tongue into Anya’s mouth.

The bathroom is stifling, a mixture of sweat and arousal heavy in the air. The only sounds in the otherwise quiet house are the harsh pants of the two women.

Anya’s slides the soaked lace of Raven’s underwear to the side, fingers teasing her girlfriend’s dripping folds. Raven’s mouth pulls away from Anya’s lips with a wanton moan, her head dropping into the nook of the blonde’s shoulder. Anya’s index finger circles Raven’s swollen clit. Raven cries out, her body desperate for friction as she rolls her hips into Anya’s hand. Anya laughs huskily into Raven’s ear, nipping at the lobe.

Raven feels like she is about to combust. Ever since meeting the blonde, she has been an insatiable mess. She has never met anybody that has the ability to work her up with just a single look. The past couple of weeks have been a blissful blur of sex piled upon even more sex. Raven’s pretty sure that she has had more sex since meeting Anya then she has had in her life. She can’t complain because the sex is mind-blowingly amazing and it only seems to get better each time.

Her inner monologue teeters off into a moan as Anya circles her clit again. She burrows her face deeply into the blonde’s neck, scraping her teeth across the thumping pulse. Her soft nip turns into a sharp bite as Anya’s fingers teasingly probe at her entrance.

Anya attaches her mouth back to Raven’s neck, biting down harshly as she thrusts two fingers roughly into her girlfriend. She sets a relentless pace, pulling almost all of the way out before slamming her fingers back inside of the brunette.

 _“Fuck. Anya…harder.”_ Raven’s moans of pleasure are muffled by Anya’s neck, her hot breath ghosting over the blonde’s skin.

Anya presses her thumb against Raven’s clit, circling the nub with each thrust. The brunette cries out loudly, hips lifting to meet her girlfriend’s thrusts. Raven’s walls clench tightly around Anya’s fingers in a greedy attempt to pull them in deeper.

_“God, you feel so good around my fingers. So tight and wet.”_

_“Please, Anya. Harder…uhh..fuck.”_ Raven moans out, her hips losing their rhythm as she approaches her climax. _“I’m so close.”_

_“I know baby. I can tell. I want to feel you come around my fingers.”_

_“Oh my god, yes.”_

_“I want you to scream my name while you come.”_

_“Yes, please.”_

_“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Screaming my name while all of your classmates are working on this house? Loud enough for everyone to hear.”_

_“Oh god.”_

Anya slides her thigh between Raven’s legs, pressing her leg into her hand for more friction.

_“I want you to come for me, Raven.”_

_“Almost….there.”_ Raven pants out as she wantonly rides Anya’s hand.

 _“Raven?”_ Miller’s voice calls out from the other side of the bathroom, the knob turning as his hand tries to open the locked door.

 _“Yes?”_ Raven squeals out as Anya curls her fingers inside of her, hitting the soft front wall that makes her see stars.

_“Professor Kane wants us to meet him in the classroom. I guess we are done for the day.”_

_“Okay.”_ Raven barely manages to stifle a scream as Anya slips a third finger inside of her, the sensations of being so full sends her dangerously close to the edge. She groans into Anya’s neck, sucking a mark over the pulse point.

_“Raven??”_

_“WHAT!!!”_

_“Come on.”_

Anya speeds up her fingers even more, thrusting almost impossibly fast into Raven’s core. She bites down harshly on Raven’s neck, curling her fingers as she circles the brunette’s clit. The mixture of all three sensations sends her crashing over the edge.

 _“Fuck!! I’m coming!!”_ She screams out as her release floods her girlfriend’s hand. The small part of her brain that isn’t short circuiting from her intense orgasm hopes that Miller thinks that she is talking to him. She knows that she is probably screwed, literally and figuratively, considering that Miller saw Anya come into the house. Right now, as Anya continues to thrust into her lazily, drawing out small aftershocks, she can’t bring herself to care. Raven presses soft kisses to Anya’s neck as her boneless body slumps into the blonde.

 _“Jesus, baby. That was…”_ Raven lets out a dissatisfied groan as Anya pulls her fingers out. Her eyes follow Anya’s as she lifts her fingers to her mouth to suck them clean. She groans at the taste, watching as Raven’s eyes darken significantly at the sight. _“Fuck. So good.”_

 _“Mmmhmmm.”_ Anya helps her girlfriend pull up her pants, pressing a kiss against Raven’s forehead as she buttons the jeans. The two women work in tandem to get Raven’s bra and top back on, Anya don’t most of the work as Raven is still trying to regain feeling in her limbs. Anya hands Raven the tool belt before grabbing the vest for herself.

_“I’m taking this.”_

_“What! No. That’s my favorite vest.”_

_“You can come get it later.”_

_“Ugh, fine. How do I look?”_

_“Like you’ve just been fucked against a wall.”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“What? It’s true.”_

_“I’m getting you back for this later.”_

_“I look forward to it.”_

_“You might not say that later.”_

_“Mmmm, kinky. I’d better go so I don’t get you in trouble.”_

_“Mmmkay.”_ Raven grips the back of Anya’s neck to pull her in for a kiss. Miller’s incessant knocking startles them apart. _“Fuck off Miller!”_ Raven growls as she leans in to once again capture her girlfriend’s lips.

_“Come on Raven. We need to go.”_

Anya reluctantly breaks the kiss, pressing their lips together a few more times before pulling away completely _. “Alright babe. Go.”_

 _“Fine.”_ Raven pulls away from Anya’s embrace, walking on unsteady legs to unlock the door. Miller is standing on the other side with a knowing smile on his face. Raven scowls, flicking her middle finger towards her classmate. _“Don’t say anything.”_

 _“I wasn’t going to say anything, except for maybe. Are we ALMOST….THERE???”_ Miller says breathlessly, trying to imitate Raven’s voice.

 _“Fuck you.”_ Raven slams her elbow into Miller’s stomach, eliciting a hiss of pain from the man.

_“No thanks. You’re not my type.”_

_“Yeah, I know. I have a ‘v’ where you only like a ‘p.’ I’ll have you know that I do own a ‘p.’”_

Miller laughs, clutching at his stomach as they make their trek across campus. _“Gross, Rae. Why would I ever need to know that?”_

_“I don’t know. I just felt like telling you.”_

_“Thanks?”_

_“Anytime dude.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Hands gripping sheets in a white knuckled grip. Breathy sighs breaking off into pleasured moans. The sounds of sweat slicked skin as it moves together. Thighs pressing, fingers curling, mouths lapping, all building up to that sought after release. Cries of passion filling the silent air, curses whispered into ears. Lips pressing together, tongues battling for dominance. Soft kisses morphing into sharp nips, marks being left behind by eager mouths. Names being screamed out as release is found, stars shooting behind eyelids, breath being expelled in a rush.

Waking up after having a very explicit sex dream was definitely not at the top of Lexa’s list of desires. Not that she would normally mind having a wet dream, but she definitely didn’t need to add this to her repertoire of inappropriate ‘friendly’ behaviors. Her head is already a mess of feelings that she can’t even begin to comprehend. And now not only is she pleasuring herself to thoughts of her ‘friend,’ her subconscious is now participating in the cruel game.

Sleep crusted green eyes lock on her cell phone, silent on the bedside table. Her fingers reach out to grab the device before she can stop them. A soft sigh leaves her lips as she notices the time; she slept for less than five hours last night.

Her mind drifts towards the awesome day that she spent hanging out with Clarke, eating pancakes and pizza. Clarke’s phone call with Niylah that sparked Lexa ridiculous bout of jealousy. Their kiss that turned into a heated make out session. Ending the night with a very inappropriate but gratifying night of self-exploration.

The desire to text Clarke is almost overwhelming. Lexa wants so badly to tell her not to go out with Niylah again. She wants to beg for a chance with the blonde, even though she knows that she doesn’t deserve it. She’s the one that shot down Clarke’s advances and now here she is, muddling the lines and probably confusing the hell out of the blonde.

She almost does it. Lexa’s fingers type out fifteen different text messages to the blonde, all of them ending in the same implied request. ‘Please pick me.’

She doesn’t send any of them though. She knows that she can’t. It’s not fair to her and more importantly, it’s not fair to Clarke.

Lexa has spent the last three years conditioning her heart to never love again. She has been conditioning her mind to compartmentalize all of the feelings that she deems weak. Not allowing anybody to get close to her carefully guarded heart that Costia broke when she died.

Clarke managed to break through all of her mile-high walls in one leap. Her easy smile and electric personality managed to pull the normally stoic brunette in like a moth to a flame. Lexa didn’t stand a chance from the very first day that Clarke made her coffee.

Lexa tried to fight it, she really did. Honestly, the brunette is still trying to fight it. Because she knows that this time is different. Clarke has managed to capture pieces of Lexa’s heart that was never able to. She knows that if she gives Clarke a chance, and it doesn’t work out, that she will never be the same. Lexa will suffer a heartbreak that she won’t ever be able to recover from.

So the best course of action is to just let Clarke be happy with someone else. She knows that she is being terribly selfish, because Clarke would never deliberately hurt her. And together, they would likely be very happy for the rest of their lives. But she just can’t muster up the courage to try. So she has to try and just be a friend. And preferably one that doesn’t engage in make out sessions with her friends.

Thoughts of the kiss filter in, making Lexa groan. This friendship is going to kill her.

The first thing that she needs is a very cold shower. She reluctantly pulls her still tired body out of bed. Lexa leaves the room as quietly as possible, careful not to wake Anya up. Her motives for being quiet are completely selfish, mostly because she doesn’t want to deal with Anya’s incessant questioning at eight o’clock in the morning. Or at any point of the day, really.

Lexa doesn’t linger in the shower as the desire to have another solo session becomes too great for her to bear. She walks back into her bedroom with a towel wrapped around her body, wet hair dripping onto the carpet. She dresses quickly, adding Clarke’s hoodie to her chosen outfit. Making the last minute decision to forgo her contacts again, Lexa puts on her glasses.

She makes the decision to spend a few hours in the campus library, intent on avoiding Anya and Clarke if she can. At least the monotony of homework will keep her mind off of her not so friendly thoughts.

Or so she hopes.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke was running late. She was already fifteen minutes late for her brunch date and her hair still needs to be done. She doesn’t waste much time with her hair, brushing the wet strands quickly and leaving her hair down to air dry. She rushes out of her dorm, her still sluggish body reluctant to respond.

She slept poorly at best last night. Her mind is a jumbled mess of confusing feelings that she can’t even being to decipher right now. Her heart is telling her one thing but her mind is telling her another. Her heart wants her to fight for Lexa, make the brunette see that they belong together. Her mind is steering her in Niylah’s direction, telling her that Lexa will never return her feelings and that Clarke will just end up with her heart broken. That Niylah has done nothing but vie for the blonde’s attention, and she has been nothing but sweet towards Clarke.

Clarke thought that she was doing a good job of moving on from her feelings towards Lexa. She was still having slip ups, as her little finger licking display proved. But Lexa just had to go and one up her with that amazing kiss. The amazing kiss that turned into a make out session that ended with her being on the receiving end of a giant hickey on her neck.

_“Fuck!!”_

In her rush to leave her dorm, she completely forgot about the enormous purple mark that she is currently sporting. She’s already twenty five minutes late and she’s only four blocks away from the diner. There is no way that she is going to go back to her dorm to cover it up. Her biggest reason is because she isn’t ashamed of the mark when really she should be. The second reason is because she would feel bad for leaving Niylah waiting any longer than she already has. She thanks whatever god above let her wake up late so that she didn’t have time to do anything fancy with her hair.

She’s only slightly out of breath when she reaches the diner at only thirty five minutes late. She waves at Maya quickly before seeking out Niylah. The brunette is seated in a booth towards the back of the diner, her attention locked on her phone.

Clarke walks up to the booth, leaning in to press a soft kiss on Niylah’s cheek before sliding into the booth across from the brunette.

_“Sorry that I’m late. I slept through my alarm.”_

_“It’s fine. I don’t know how you manage to function on a daily basis anyway.”_

_“A lot of caffeine. I am probably responsible for half of the revenue that Monster makes annually.”_

_“Gross.”_

_“Sometimes when I have to work both jobs, I buy one of the Java Monsters and pour it into an Americano.”_

_“That sounds terribly unhealthy, Clarke.”_

_“Hey! I work out.”_

_“I can tell. Doesn’t make it any less unhealthy.”_

Clarke laughs softly. _“Shush.”_

_“What are you going to eat?”_

_“Probably just a chicken club. I usually get pancakes but I’m not that hungry.”_

_“Sounds good.  I’ll probably get a burger.”_

_“Good choice.”_

Truth is, Clarke has never ordered anything but the pancakes at the diner. She’s sure that they have other food that is good, but once she had the pancakes, she was hooked.

Sitting here with Niylah, she just can’t bring herself to order the fluffy flapjacks that she loves. She thinks back to her breakfast with Lexa, and ordering the pancakes with anybody else feels wrong.

She’s knows that it’s a crazy feeling to have, but she just can’t change her mind.

So when Maya asks her if she wants her usual, Clarkes shakes her head and orders the chicken club instead. Maya looks confused, but nods before taking Niylah’s order.

The brunette is the first one to make small talk after Maya walks away. Clarke is still stuck inside of her head, trying to work through the mess that Lexa has created inside of her.

_“So, did you get your paper done?”_

_“Umm..”_ Clarke’s mind drifts to the night before. Lexa’s hot lips pressed against her neck, sucking and nipping at the pulse point. She shifts uncomfortably in her seat, trying to quell the heat building in her body. _“No.”_

_“No? What happened?”_

**-Oh you know, just making out with my ‘friend’ that you are jealous of. With good reason. Because I can’t stop thinking about her. And the giant hickey that she left on my neck.-**

_“I fell asleep while working on it.”_

_“Yeah? Did you at least get a good portion of it done?”_

_“I got the rough draft put together.”_

_“When is it due?”_

_“Tomorrow afternoon.”_

_“Clarke!!! Why the procrastination?”_

_“Oh I don’t know. I’ve been hanging out with this pretty hot brunette lately. Plus I work two jobs and total out to about eighty or ninety hours a week.”_ Clarke says playfully, although her thoughts are immediately on Lexa.

 _“The makes sense.”_ Niylah takes a sip of her drink, quirking her eyebrow at Clarke. _“A hot brunette, you say?”_

_“Yeah, she’s not bad.”_

**-Nice save Griffin!-**

_“Rude.”_

Before Clarke can make herself seem like an even bigger asshole, Maya drops off their food. Clarke immediately grabs her sandwich, desperate to avoid conversation.

She’s halfway through her lunch when she makes her first mistake. Her hair falls into her face, a piece of it getting into her mouth with a bite of her sandwich. Pulling the hair out of her mouth, she absentmindedly pushes her hair back behind her ear.

Clarke doesn’t immediately realize that she has made a mistake. At least not until Niylah’s eyes zero in on Clarke’s neck, widening exponentially. Niylah coughs loudly, taking a sip of her water before clearing her throat. Clarke slaps a hand to her neck, eyes dropping down to stare at the table. She can feel a blush rising on her cheeks as panic begins to settle in her body.

_“So, Clarke. What happened to your neck?”_

_“Oh..this?”_ Clarke points to the hickey. _“Someone punched me in the neck.”_

_“In the neck?”_

_“Yeah. See I’m part of a very specific type of fight club.”_

_“A fight club? Really?”_

_“Yeah. The first rule is that we punch people in the neck. The second rule is that we don’t talk about the fight club. Speaking of, we should probably switch those two rules around.”_

_“So you’re telling me, that you are part of an underground fight club. And that the mark on your neck is not a hickey, but a bruise?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Oh Clarke,”_ Niylah bursts out laughing; _“Do you think that I’m an idiot?”_

_“No, I don’t. I swear. The real story is just really embarrassing.”_

_“It can’t be more farfetched than a story of an underground fight club.”_

_“Oh it’s pretty bad.”_

_“Try me.”_

_“So Raven and I got into an argument and she threw an apple at me. I ducked so it wouldn’t hit me in the face. So it smacked me in the side of my neck. And that’s how I got the bruise.”_

_“So Raven threw an apple at your face?”_

_“Yes. She’s done it before. Last time it gave me a black eye.”_

_“I can totally see that happening.”_

_“Well I should hope so, because that is what happened.”_

_“That can’t have felt very good.”_

_“I mean it didn’t feel great, but at least it wasn’t my face.”_

_“That’s true. So what are your plans for the rest of the day?”_

_“Well. I have to work at Arkadia tonight, so I need to finish my paper before I go in.”_

_“Yikes. What time do you have to work?”_

_“At five. Until two.”_

_“Jesus Clarke.”_

_“What?”_

_“You just work too much.”_

_“Well, I make really good tips at the bar, so I’m not going to leave just because I don’t get a lot of sleep. And Indra took a chance on me when nobody else would. So I’m loyal to her.”_

_“I know. But when do you ever have time for yourself?”_

_“I mean. When I’m not at work, I am sleeping or painting. So I guess when I’m painting. That’s my time for myself.”_

_“Don’t you ever want more?”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“I mean, aren’t you tired of just working and school? What about hanging out with your friends? Or going out on dates?”_

_“I see my friends all of the time. Octavia works with me at the café and Raven and I live together. As far as dates go, I haven’t really dated anybody since I broke up with my last boyfriend. Well, before I met you.”_

_“What made you say yes to me?”_

**-Because I have a huge crush on one of my friends and I can’t get over her. Essentially I am using you to try and get over her. And the worst part about it is that it’s not working. -**

That is what Clarke wants to say to Niylah. But she can’t hurt the girl sitting across from her. Especially with how happy she looks right now.

_“You flirted with me. And you’re really hot. And both of my friends are attached right now and it sucks to be the fifth wheel.”_

_“So you’re using me to not be the fifth wheel?”_

Clarke’s eyes widen as she shakes her head vehemently. _“No. I’m not using you….”_

 _“Clarke.”_ Niylah places her hand on top of Clarke’s. _“I’m totally kidding.”_

_“Oh my god. You’re evil.”_

_“I know. Do you have a little bit of time to hang out today? If you don’t, I totally understand.”_

_“No..we can hang out. I mean I just have to write out my paper. It shouldn’t take too long. So if you want, you can come over?”_

_“Okay, yeah. I’d like that.”_

_“Okay. Well let me go pay and we can get out of here.”_

Clarke stands up, intent on walking up to pay the bill, she stops when Niyah’s hand grasps her wrist.

_“No way lady. I’m paying.”_

_“Niylah, no. You paid for our dinner date.”_

_“I know. But I asked you out for brunch.”_

_“Nope. I’m paying.”_

_“No..Clar”_

Clarke raises her eyebrows at the brunette, daring her to say something else. Niylah relinquishes her grip on Clarke’s wrist, a whispered ‘fine’ leaving her lips. Clarke smirks at the brunette, winking as she walks away from the booth.

Maya is standing at the cash register with a smirk on her face when Clarke walks up with the bill clasped in her hand.

_“So Clarke, two girls in one week? That’s a record for you considering that you only bring Raven or O here.”_

_“Shut up Maya. It’s not like that.”_

_“Is that so?”_

_“Yeah. The girl that I brought the other day, Lexa, is my friend. The girl with me today, Niylah, I’ve gone out with once. Well twice now.”_

_“So which one of them is responsible for that massive hickey on your neck?”_

Clarke’s eyes widen as she covers her neck with her free hand. _“Maya! You don’t have to point it out.”_

_“Oh, honey. A blind man could see that thing. It’s huge.”_

_“Shut up! I told Niylah that it was a bruise.”_

_“Well I mean, technically it is a bruise. A bruise that you get from having somebody bite and suck on your skin.”_

Clarke rolls her eyes in annoyance. _“I know how a hickey is formed, Mom.”_

_“Well that’s good, considering that you once planned on becoming a doctor, Griffin. Now, answer my question. Who gave you that winner?”_

_“Lexa did.”_ Clarke whispers. _“Niylah asked about it and I panicked. I told her that Raven threw an apple at me again.”_

Maya’s eyes widen, she lets out a surprised chuckle as she shakes her head. _“Oh Clarke. Good thing that you only half lied. Since your roommate is a psycho and all. You’re still a hussy, Griffin.”_

Clarke reaches out to smack Maya in the arm. _“You’re such a bitch! I kind of hate you right now.”_

_“No you don’t. Mostly because my boyfriend is your boss, but whatever.”_

_“You’re right. I don’t hate you. And it’s not because of Jasper, dummy. We’ve been friends for three years now. And as your friend, I beg of you to not tell my date that another woman gave me this hickey.”_

_“Oh, scandalous. You want me to be a part of your lie?”_

_“Well, I’m just asking you not to tell Jasper about it, because Niylah comes to the bar and your boyfriend is the worst gossip.”_

_“Jasper is not that bad.”_

_“Yes he is. How do you think we got the rumor about Finn spread around campus so quickly?”_

_“That was three years ago.”_

_“Oh Maya, once a gossip, always a gossip.”_

_“What are you guys talking about over here?”_ Niylah says, coming up behind Clarke.

_“Clarke was just telling me about Raven throwing an apple at her again.”_

_“Yeah, that’s pretty crazy.”_

_“Well if you knew Raven like I do. Last time Clarke got a black eye.”_

_“That girl is dangerous.”_

_“Yeah. Well Clarke did date her boyfriend while Raven was still with him.”_

_“Maya!! I didn’t know!! And that isn’t why she hit me with an apple.”_

_“I know. I’m just giving you crap. It was because you guys got into that fight after you slept with the girl that she was trying to hook up with.”_

_“Hey! I was drunk and Raven wouldn’t make her move.”_

_“Well? I can’t blame her for being mad at you.”_

Clarke’s blue eyes narrow in false anger. _“I’m done with you. Let’s go Niylah.”_

_“Bye Clarke. See you tonight!!! Nice to meet you Niylah!”_

_“Same, Maya.”_

_“Bye Maya.”_

The two women leave the diner together. They make small talk on the way back to Clarke’s dorm. Niylah has to grab Clarke’s hand to stop her from getting stuck by a car at one point, the idiot driver ignoring the crosswalk signal. Clarke absentmindedly interlaces her fingers with Niylah’s, walking hand in hand with the brunette until they reach her room. It’s only when Clarke moves to unlock her door that she realizes her hand is still interlocked with the brunette’s. Clarke drops the brunette’s hand quickly, looking at her apologetically.

_“Sorry. I didn’t mean to just hijack your hand.”_

_“It’s totally fine. I don’t mind. It felt nice.”_

_“Yeah, it did, didn’t it?”_ Clarke says quietly as she pulls her key out of her pocket, unlocking the door. The two women enter the room, Clarke breathing a sigh of relief when she realizes that Raven is not back from working on her project yet. She’s really not prepared to deal with her best friend’s comments this early in the morning. Settling on her bed, Clarke pats the spot next to her to invite Niylah to sit down.

_“I know that this isn’t the ideal hangout. I’m sorry.”_

_“It’s alright. You need to worry about your schoolwork. I’ll just sit here and watch you like a creep.”_

_“Sounds awesome.”_ Clarke laughs as she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. _“It shouldn’t take me very long to write this.”_

_“Take all of the time that you need.”_

Clarke pulls her laptop out of her bag, booting the device up. Her mind is instantly flooded with images of Lexa studying beside her last night, glasses surrounding her forest green eye. She thinks back to the not so subtle way that those spectacled eyes would linger on Clarke when Lexa thought that she wasn’t looking. Or the way that Lexa would bite at the corner of her lip when she was trying to concentrate on her reading.

She has to bite back a groan as she remembers the feeling of Lexa’s lips on her own. Or the feeling of Lexa’s eager mouth as it bit and sucked at the corded muscle of Clarke’s neck. Or the soft feeling of Lexa’s wavy brown locks as her fingers tangle into them.

Clarke feels a pang of remorse resonate in her chest as she thinks about Lexa while Niylah is right next to her. She knows that her brain isn’t going to let her focus on her paper. It seems content on torturing her with explicit thoughts of the brunette. She sets her laptop on the ground with a sigh, turning her attention towards Niylah. She is typing something out on her phone, or playing a game. Clarke isn’t really sure. And she definitely doesn’t care right now. Her fingertips grasp Niylah’s phone, snatching the device away. When Niylah looks at her questioningly, Clarke closes the distance between them to capture the brunette’s lips.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Sitting through Professor Kane’s lecture was absolute torture for Raven. Her mind is still a foggy mess of lust and post coital bliss. She’s pretty positive that Kane is just droning on to be a jerk, adamant about keeping them inside of the lecture hall on a Sunday.

By the time he allows them to leave, Raven is bordering on insanity. She can’t shake the thought of Anya being pressed up against her, eager to devour her while all of her classmates worked on the house around them. All because of the red tool belt that Raven had resting across her hips.

The thought of the tool belt sparks an idea in Raven’s mind, her body immediately breaking out in a cold sweat. She picks up her pace, her limped gait more noticeable in her rush. By the time she reaches her dorm, her breathing is slightly labored. The door is unlocked, leading Raven to believe that Clarke is home from her date. Raven enters the room without hesitation, her eyes darting around the room just in case the blonde forgot to lock the door on her way out this morning. Her gaze stops on Clarke’s bed, where she sees the naked back of her best friend straddling another girl. Her eyes only linger on Clarke’s back for a minute, the shooting star tattoo on her left shoulder being the brunette’s focal point.

Raven unclasps her tool belt, setting it on her bed. When she can no longer take the sounds of her best friend’s make out session, Raven clears her throat loudly. Clarke yelps, tripping on her feet as she attempts to scramble off of the other girl’s lap, causing her to fall on the floor.

_“Sorry. Didn’t mean to interrupt anything. I just had to grab some stuff really quickly before I go over to Anya’s.”_

Raven makes her way over to the dresser, pulling out a white tank top and a pair of denim shorts. She glances at her best friend, who is still on the floor, panting harshly. Her chest is heaving with her labored breaths, a red blush coloring the skin. Niylah is sprawled out on Clarke’s bed, holding a pillow to her chest. Both girls look completely horrified as Raven eye’s them amusedly.

_“I just need to change and I will be out of your hair. So you guys can continue whatever you were about to do.”_

Raven moves quickly into the bathroom without another word. She undoes her brace first, pulling the contraption off of her knee. Setting it on the bathroom counter, she quickly strips out of her clothes. She turns the shower tap on, letting the water heat up. Raven gets into the shower, intent on washing the dirt and sex off of her body from earlier. She shampoos and conditions quickly, taking a few minutes to shave her legs. She definitely doesn’t want to put short denims shorts on possibly prickly legs. She knows that she is probably good, but she doesn’t want to take any risks. After washing her body, she turns the tap off. She towels off quickly, leaving her hair wet. Pulling the shorts and tank top on, Raven reluctantly puts the brace back on her knee before leaving the bathroom.

Clarke has managed to pull her body off of the floor, sliding back into her bed. She has the comforter resting over her and Niylah’s bodies. Raven shakes her head with a smirk, kneeling down to fumble under her bed. She pulls the black box out from under her bed, keeping her back to Clarke so that her friend doesn’t ask any questions. She pulls a few tools out of the belt, replacing them with the contents of the box. When Raven is satisfied with the concealment of her ‘extra tool,’ she stands back up to her full height. Eyeing her still embarrassed best friend, she offers a smile and a wave.

_“Bye girls. Carry on.”_

She leaves the room quickly, closing the door before Clarke can offer a sarcastic retort. She locks the door, buckling the tool belt back around her waist.

Her walk to Anya’s place is filled with thoughts of what is to come. She is literally buzzing with the excitement of asserting her dominance and taking her girlfriend. She knows that Anya is going to be excited to say the least. After all, adding the toy into their already explosive sex life was the blonde’s idea.

Before she knows it, she is in front of Anya’s door, her hand hanging limply in front of her. She shakes herself out of her inner dialogue, raising her fist to knock on the door. She shakes out the tension in her shoulders, taking a few deep breaths to get into character before her girlfriend opens the door.

Anya’s eyes widen as soon as she opens the door, taking in the sight of Raven in her short denim shorts and white tank top, her lacy black bra visible through the fabric. Raven’s mouth is set in a thin line, her brow furrowed in concentration.

_“Excuse me. I got a work order about some faulty wiring in the apartment.”_

_“What? Rae?”_

_“No, ma’am. Name’s Lindz. The complex called me to come take a look at the apartment.”_

_“Okay.”_ Anya steps aside, allowing ‘Lindz’ to walk into the apartment. The brunette’s eyes glance around the room. She turns back to Anya, her face impassive and stoic.

_“Is there a specific room that you’ve been experiencing problems in?”_

_“Um, my bedroom mostly.”_ Anya’s shaky voice responds. Raven smiles as she meets her girlfriend’s wide, arousal blown eyes.

_“Okay. Can you show me to your bedroom please?”_

_“Yeah, sure. It’s back this way.”_ Anya walks down the hall, Raven following closely behind her. The brunette takes in the sight of her girlfriend’s back. The defined muscles of her shoulders, the curve of her hips. Raven’s gaze lingers on the swell of Anya’s backside and the smooth, endless expanse of her toned legs shown off by her boxers. She feels a sharp jolt of arousal as she watches the sway in Anya’s hips, obviously exaggerated for Raven’s enjoyment.

 _“Right…so. I will just leave you to it. I am going to go finish taking my shower.”_ Anya turns to face ‘Lindz’ with a wicked smirk on her face. She steps forward until she is right in front of her girlfriend. Anya runs her hands over the curves of the brunette’s breasts, nails scraping against the tank top’s fabric. Her fingers curl around Raven’s tool belt, tugging the brunette in closely. Their lips are barely an inch apart, soft breaths shared between them.

 _“Sounds good. I’ll be quick.”_ Raven’s stuttered statement makes Anya smile. The brunette’s throat quivering with the force of her swallows.

_“I hope that you’re not.”_

_“Hmmm..it all depends.”_ Raven has to bite her lip to prevent a moan from escaping, her arousal skyrocketing at the sultry tone of her girlfriend’s voice.

 _“Well. Yell if you need anything.”_ Anya runs her fingers underneath Raven’s tank top, goosebumps being left in the wake of her soft scratches.

_“I will.”_

Anya turns away from Raven, leaving the flustered brunette standing in the middle of the bedroom. She sighs, her plan to surprise her girlfriend backfiring on her a little bit. The blonde is managing to unravel her confidence with just one heated look.

Raven walks aimlessly around the room, allowing Anya enough time to take her shower. She can hear the water running in the bathroom. She knows that Anya usually in the shower for about fifteen minutes, so she can bide her time for a bit. She decides to figure out the ‘tool’ that she brought. Raven takes her tool belt off and sets it on the bed before sitting down. She pulls out the items that she tucked into the belt.

The visit to the shop was not as awkward as Raven had originally thought it was going to be. The cashier was actually knowledgeable and eager to help Raven out with her purchase. She suggested a strap on that uses a pair of boy briefs instead of a harness. The red and black underwear have a layer of foam around the hole in the front that is designed for the toy to slip into. Raven is grateful that there are no weird buckles or straps to fumble with. The foam is set around the hole to hold the toy securely in place. The dildo itself is still packaged; it’s silicone the same color red as the briefs. Raven picked the color because she knows how good she looks in red and she believes that it will drive Anya crazy.

Raven sets the toy on the bedside table. She pulls her brace off before getting off of the bed. Standing up, she unclasps her shorts and pulls them down with her underwear. She kicks the shorts and underwear under Anya’s bed for now, sitting down to pull the briefs on. They are surprisingly comfortable, snug in all of the right places. She decides to forgo the toy for now, pulling back the covers to settle in the bed, her back resting against the headboard.

Raven doesn’t have to wait very long before Anya walks back into the bedroom with a fluffy blue towel wrapped around her freshly showered body.

Anya’s eyes widen as she takes in the sight of Raven in her bed with the comforter pulled up to her waist. Anya saunters over to the bed, hands on her hips as she eyes the brunette.

_“Did you figure out the problem?”_

_“Yes I did.”_

_“Well? Did you fix it?”_

_“Not yet. But I’m about to.”_ Raven’s hands reach out to grab at Anya’s towel clad body. She tugs at the ends of the towel, causing the fabric to pool at Anya’s feet. She bites her lip at the sight of her now fully exposed girlfriend. Her body is still glistening from her shower, droplets of water sliding down her skin. Raven’s eyes drink in the supple curves of Anya’s breasts, her nipples responding to the cold air of the room. She trails her eyes down Anya’s flat stomach, the hardened planes of muscle making Raven’s body clench with desire. A soft moan leaving her lips as her eyes finally land on the apex of her girlfriend’s thighs, the small strip of short golden hair covering her glistening sex. _“Get over here so I can show you.”_

Raven scoots over to allow Anya space to crawl into the bed. Raven turns on her side to face Anya.

_“So where’s the faulty wiring?”_

_“Well it’s in a few places actually.”_ Raven leans in to capture Anya’s lips in a heated kiss. Her tongue immediately seeks entrance into her girlfriend’s mouth, the muscle eagerly memorizing every nook and cranny. Raven keeps control of the kiss, her dominant mouth coaxing needy whimpers out of the blonde. Anya’s back arches slightly off of the bed, pressing her body harder into the kiss. Raven lifts her body over Anya’s, straddling the blonde’s hips. She breaks the kiss to tear her tank top over her head, tossing it to the ground. Her hands find purchase against Anya’s hipbones, her fingertips scratching lightly at the skin. Anya moans into the kiss, her teeth nipping at the flesh of Raven’s bottom lip. Raven’s hands ghost up Anya’s sides, fingertips brushing the underside of the blonde’s breasts. Anya breaks the kiss with a loud gasp the instant Raven’s fingers ghost over her pert nipples. Raven’s eager hands cup the full flesh, squeezing and kneading the pliant skin.

 _“Well, is that that first problem area?”_ Anya breathes out, her voice husky with her arousal.

 _“Yes.”_ Raven lowers her mouth down to take nipple into her mouth, her teeth scraping the puckered flesh softly. She is rewarded with a loud moan, Anya’s hands tangling into her hair to hold her in place. Raven releases the nipple from her mouth, her lust darkened eyes meeting the blonde’s. Raven interlaces her fingers between Anya’s, lifting the blonde’s arms over her head.

_“I only have on rule. You are not trained to work with wiring. So the likelihood of you getting hurt is extremely high. My rule is, you are not allowed to touch. If you touch, I will have to stop this inspection. Am I clear?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Okay. Leave your hands above your head.”_

_“Okay.”_

Raven lets go of Anya’s hands, her own returning to their previous place. They knead eagerly, fingers pulling lightly at pert nipples. Anya’s hands clench the bedsheets tightly, a keening moan leaving her lips.

 _“This is the second problem area.”_ Raven leans down to press feather a light kiss to Anya neck. She sucks at the pulse point, teeth nipping and scraping at the flesh. She moves her mouth down, tongue trailing Anya’s collarbones. She presses kisses to each side before trailing her lips down Anya’s abdomen. Raven kisses the skin as she moves down, small reddened love bites left in her wake.

As she settles in between her girlfriend’s thighs, Raven sucks in a breath as her eyes meet her girlfriend’s glistening sex. She doesn’t waste any time, nuzzling her face into Anya’s core. Anya’s response is immediate. Her hips buck up sharply towards Raven’s face, a loud moan leaving the blonde’s lips. Raven’s moans as her tongue meets Anya’s engorged clit. She circles the bundle over nerves tightly, scraping her teeth softly against it.

 _“Fuck,”_ Anya moans out, locking eyes with her girlfriend, _“Fuck, that feels good.”_

Raven flicks her tongue against the blonde’s clit, the heady arousal causing her to moan. She moves her tongue down, teasing at Anya’s entrance. She thrusts her tongue inside; stroking her girlfriend’s fluttering walls. Anya lets out a pleasured groan, her hips thrust in time with each stroke of Raven’s tongue. Raven feels one of Anya’s hands slip into her hair, pressing Raven harder against her core. Raven pushes her mouth away from Anya’s core, wrapping a hand around the blonde’s to untangle it from her hair.

Raven sits back on her haunches, a scowl directed at the blonde.

_“Now, now. What did I say was my number one rule?”_

_“No touching.”_ Anya growls out, frustration evident on her face.

_“Right. And what did you just do?”_

_“I touched.”_

_“So. What did I say would happen if you broke the rule?”_

_“That you would stop the inspection.”_ Anya growls. _“For fuck’s sake, babe.”_

_“What?”_

_“I need you.”_

_“Need me to what?”_

_“Raven!”_

_“Hmmm?”_

_“If you aren’t going to fuck me, move so I can do it myself.”_

_“Is that so?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Well, now. You aren’t being very good. I brought over a surprise for you and I don’t think that you deserve it.”_

_“What?”_ Anya’s eyes widen in confusion.

 _“Well.”_ Raven runs her hand teasingly through Anya’s folds, fingers lightly circling her entrance. Anya moans desperately, hips lifting to try and gain friction. Raven clicks her tongue, moving her hand out of reach. _“I don’t think that you deserve your present.”_

_“Please, baby. I’m sorry.”_

_“Are you?”_ Raven questions as she rakes her fingers softly up Anya’s inner thighs.

_“Yes. Please. I’ll do whatever you want. Just, fuck me please.”_

_“Grab me the box off of the bedside table, will you?”_

_“What?”_ Anya’s head turns towards the black box sitting on the table. She grabs it hesitantly, handing it over to her girlfriend. _“What’s in the box, Rae?”_

_“Hmmm. It’s your present.”_

_“Yeah I know. But what is it?”_

_“I don’t know,”_ Raven hands the box back to the blonde, _“Why don’t you open it and find out?”_

Anya opens the box, eyes widening as she takes in the contents. The dark red silicone toy is nestled inside, a small bottle of lube next to it. _“Babe.”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“You bought a toy?”_

“Umhmm.”

Anya moans softly. _“Baby.”_

Raven takes the box out of Anya’s hand. She takes the bottle of lube out, setting it on the bed. Raven takes the toy out of the box. She stretches out the waistband of the boy shorts, slipping the toy through the hole. Staring down at her new ‘appendage’, she has to resist the urge to giggle like a teenaged boy. She can’t stop herself from pressing her finger against the tip, shaking her head as it bounces slightly at her touch.

_“Rae.”_

Raven meets Anya’s gaze, sucking in a breath at the look in the blonde’s eyes. Anya’s pupils are blown wide, her bottom lip tucked between her teeth. Anya’s eyes are zeroed in on Raven’s added ‘appendage.’

_“Yes, An?”_

_“You look so fucking hot.”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“God, yes. Please babe.”_

_“Please what?”_

_“You know.”_

Raven smiles, grabbing the lube off of the bed. She flips the cap and pours some in her hands before recapping it and setting it on the floor. She makes eye contact with Anya as she palms the toy, spreading the lube around the toy. She scoots her body closer to her girlfriend’s with a wicked smile on her face. Taking the toy in her left hand, she slides the silicone teasingly through her girlfriend’s folds. Anya’s moan is sinful, loud and unhinged. She arches her back in search of more friction, groaning when Raven pulls her hips away.

 _“I want to hear you say it, Anya.”_ Raven thrusts her hips slightly, teasing her girlfriend again.

 _“Please Raven.”_ Anya moans, lifting her hips to try and meet Raven’s thrusts. _“Please, fuck me already.”_

 _“Hmm, I don’t know baby. Do you think that you deserve to be fucked, Anya?”_ Raven questions, eyebrow quirked in question.

_“Yes, baby. Please.”_

Raven grips the toy tightly, guiding it towards the blonde’s entrance. She leans down, capturing Anya’s lips with her own as she eases the toy inside of her entrance. Both women let out a gasp into the other’s mouth, Anya’s slight shift of her hips causing the toy to slide in to the hilt. Anya‘s lip bites down on Raven’s lip harshly, the slight taste of copper on her tongue. She pulls away from the brunette’s lips with a moan.

_“Fuck, babe.”_

_“Are you okay?”_ Raven’s voice is broken, hoarse with lust as her hips thrust, seeking out a rhythm. Her hands grip Anya’s hips, halting her movement momentarily. She pulls the toy almost all of the way out before thrusting back in, the force of which causes the other end of the toy to press the boy shorts against her. She lets out a soft moan, pulling Anya’s hips in for her next thrust.

 _“Yes, fuck yes.”_ Anya’s broken cry is like music to Raven’s ears. Raven makes a mental note to make those sounds come out of Anya’s mouth more often.

 _“How does it feel?”_ Anya gasps as Raven finds her rhythm, pulling her hips in with every thrust.

 _“It’s ah…”_ Anya’s voice teeters off into a loud moan as Raven cants her hips sharply, the toy pressing deeply into the blonde. _“Good.”_ Another sharp cant has the blonde repeating the moan. _“It’s really good. Fuck babe. Harder.”_ Anya wraps her legs around Raven’s waist, locking her ankles to pull the brunette into her. Both women moan as the toy slips impossibly deeper into Anya.

Raven can feel the heat building in the pit of her stomach as the toy rubs against her in a way that is almost right. She’s pretty sure that mixed with the sounds that her girlfriend is making, she will be able to come.

If only her fucking leg would get the memo. Raven wants to scream in frustration as she feels the damaged muscles seizing up, pain shooting through her leg. She pulls the toy out of Anya, a disappointed groan leaving the blonde’s lips.

 _“Switch places with me.”_ Raven rasps as another sharp jolt of pain hits her. _“I want you to ride me.”_

 _“Fuck.”_ The thought of being on top of the brunette makes Anya’s insides clench with desire. She can also see the pain in Raven’s eyes as the brunette tries to mask it. _“You could’ve told me you were hurting.”_

_“It just started, I swear.”_

Raven voice is husky with arousal. She smiles softly as Anya sits up to switch places with her. Anya captures her lips in a heated kiss, her hands reaching around the brunette to unclasp her bra. She tosses the bra to the floor, hands immediately finding purchase on Raven’s ample chest. Raven moans into Anya’s mouth, arching her back into her girlfriend’s touch. Anya pecks Raven’s lips before pulling away to get off of the bed. She places a hand on the brunette’s shoulder, gently guiding her into a lying position. As soon as Raven is settled, Anya straddles her girlfriend’s hips, moaning as the toy rubs up against her. She rests her hands on Raven’s hips, lifting her own up as Raven guides the toy inside of her. Anya lets out a groan as the toy is thrust deeply inside of her, the new position allowing for deeper penetration.

“Oh, fuck.” Anya lifts her hips, setting a rhythm with the toy. Her hands slide up Raven’s hips, eager as they grasp the brunette’s breasts. Raven moans, bucking her hips into her girlfriend’s. “Yes, baby.” Anya lifts herself up, thrusting down hard on the toy. The force of the thrust causes the toy to rub up against Raven, eliciting a moan from her lips. The pressure of toy against her mixed with Anya’s pleasured gasps build Raven up to her orgasm quickly, her body begging for release. She speeds up the canting of her hips, meeting Anya’s thrusts. _“Oh god baby. I’m getting close.”_

 _“Me too, baby.”_ Raven’s broken cry ends in a moan as a sharp thrust makes the toy bump deliciously against her clit. She grasps the blonde’s hips, forcing her hips into a rhythm.

 _“Really?”_ Anya questions as she kneads Raven’s breasts, her fingers pinching puckered nipples.

 _“Oh god, yes.”_ Raven moans out, speeding up her thrusting hips. One of her hands slips off of Anya’s hip, sliding between her legs. She seeks out the bundle of nerves, swirling her thumb in a circle as she thrusts into her girlfriend.

 _“Fuck!”_ Anya’s hips stutter out of rhythm, grinding down on the toy. _“I want you to come with me.”_

 _“Yes, baby. Just keep doing that.”_ Raven replies, circling Anya’s clit again. _“That feels so good.”_

Anya speeds up her hips, grinding down on the toy with each thrust. The grinding causes the toy to press against Raven’s clit, each thrust threatening to send her spiraling over the edge. She’ll be damned if she comes first, this is supposed to be about her girlfriend. Plus she already got one orgasm today, hardly seems fair to come before her girlfriend. The mixture of the toy rubbing against her and Anya’s eager hands kneading her breasts are making it hard to concentrate, the desire to fall over the edge almost too great.

So she speeds up her finger’s ministrations, pinching slightly at Anya’s bundle of nerves. She can feel her girlfriend’s walls tightening, signaling that her release is near.

 _“Fuck!!”_ Raven thrusts deeply into the blonde, a harsh groan leaving her lips. _“Baby…I’m going to..”_ Another deep thrust makes Anya’s rhythm falter. _“Fuck…I…I’m.”_ The next deep thrust sends Anya tumbling over the edge, Raven’s name being cried out like a prayer. The sight of her girlfriend coming around her is enough to send her careening over as well, a broken cry leaving her lips as she back arches off of the bed. Raven continues to thrust lazing, drawing soft aftershocks out of her girlfriend. She stops when Anya slumps into her chest, panting hard. Raven turns to her side, setting Anya’s boneless body down on the mattress. The blonde groans sadly when Raven slips out of her. Raven fumbles with the dildo for a moment before successfully pulling it out of the briefs. She sets the toy on top of the bedside table, turning back to face her girlfriend. Anya’s breath has evened out, leading the brunette to believe that she has fallen asleep. Raven snuggles into her girlfriend’s back, pressing a soft kiss against her slightly sweaty neck. Anya moans lightly but makes no other move. Raven tangles their bodies together, pulling the comforter over them. It doesn’t take long for her to fall asleep; Anya’s even breathing lulling her into dreamland.

**-TBC-**

**Who needs a cold shower?? Hope that you enjoyed sinning with me today. Until next time Kru!**


	8. Wildest Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -O and Clarke have a dinner date.  
> -Clarke has an interesting dream.  
> -Lexa also has an interesting dream.  
> -Lincoln and Lexa are brotping it up.  
> -Instagram shenanigans ensue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Alright Kru, here is your next update. This chapter is very Clarke heavy, but I had to explain some of her backstory. I promise that the next update will be Lexacentric. Not any Clexa interaction this time, but believe you me, the next update will also be heavy with that. This is also a lot shorter than my normal updates, but the next thing that I have planned would’ve made it too long. So anyway, I hope that you guys enjoy and feel free to let me know what you think! Read on beautiful people!!
> 
> Shout out to my Beta, Randomme103 for dealing with my craziness. Even though she doesn’t want credit, she will have to SUFFER!!!!!!

**-*-Barista’s Choice-*-**

 

**~Chapter 7~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke knows that she is almost at her breaking point. She is so exhausted right now that she can’t even think straight. Not that she ever really thinks straight anyway. Great. She’s so exhausted that now she’s comparing her inability to think to her sexuality.

After Niylah left her dorm room earlier, slightly pissed off due to Raven’s untimely interruption, Clarke forced her sluggish brain to focus long enough to finish her paper. Due to her innate ability to knock out a decent paper in no time, she managed to write her final draft in only two hours. By the time she finished typing the paper out, she could barely keep her eyes open. She grabs her cell phone, sending Jasper a quick text message to let him know that she won’t be able to make it in for her shift. As soon as she receives his response, telling her to get some much needed sleep, she passes out in her bed.

When Clarke regains consciousness, she feels a thousand times better than she has in weeks. Her mind is clear and her body is no longer feeling fatigued. Glancing at her phone, she gasps when she realizes that it is almost nine o’clock in the evening. She’s been asleep for almost six hours. She knows that her body was exhausted if nearly six hours of sleep has managed to leave her feeling this well rested.

Raven is not in their dorm, probably still holed up inside of Anya’s apartment. She hasn’t called or texted Clarke, leading the blonde to believe that she is probably ‘busy.’ Not wanting to interrupt her friend’s activities (even though Raven has no problem interrupting her), she sends a text to Octavia instead.

 **Griffers: (08:03 p.m.)** _Hey O. What are you up to right now?_

 **O-Face: (08:03 p.m.)** _Nothing much. Sitting in my dorm, studying. Why?_

 **Griffers: (08:03 p.m.)** _Have you had anything to eat for dinner yet?_

 **O-Face: (08:04 p.m.)** _No, why? Clarke Griffin, are you asking me to dinner?_

 **Griffers: (08:04 p.m.)** _Shut up, O. I’m fucking starving and I really want some Thai food._

 **O-Face: (08:04 p.m.)** _Dude….so much yes right now. What about Rae?_

 **Griffers: (08:05 p.m.)** _She’s at Anya’s. I swear those two screw more than you and Lincoln did when you guys first started dating._

 **O-Face: (08:05 p.m.)** _They’re in the honeymoon phase. They will get bored eventually._

 **Griffers: (08:05 p.m.)** _I doubt it. Raven bought them a toy. I named it the Mechanic._

 **O-Face: (08:06 p.m.)**   _Gross. Dude, I did not need that visual._

 **Griffers: (08:06 p.m.)** _At least you didn’t have to see it._

 **O-Face: (08:06 p.m.)** _Yeah. And hopefully I will never have to. I’ll be at your dorm in fifteen._

 **Griffers: (08:07 p.m.)** _Okay. I’ll leave the door unlocked. I’m gonna jump in the shower._

 **O-Face: (08:07 p.m.)** _Okie Dokie Princess._

Clarke showers quickly, pulling on a pair of dark gray basketball shorts and a black tank top. When she walks back into her room, running her towel through her curly blonde locks, Octavia is sitting on Raven’s bed with her attention on her phone.

 _“Hey Princess.”_ Octavia says without looking up from her phone. She is clad in tight leather pants, a lacy red top and her tight leather jacket. Her red and black helmet is next to her on Raven’s bed, causing Clarke to let out a groan. Octavia looks up at Clarke with a grin on her face.

_“You rode your motorcycle?”_

_“Yeah. Lincoln took the truck. Something about having a new client at the gym. So you’ll have to deal with the bike today, Princess.”_

_“Ugh. Fine.”_ Clarke turns away from O, walking towards her dresser. _“I think that my helmet is in the closet. Will you grab it while I put on some pants?”_

_“Whoa Griffin. What the fuck happened to your neck? Or I guess the better question is who happened to your neck?”_

_“What?”_

_“Don’t play coy with me Princess. Who made a feast out of your neck?”_

Clarke’s eyes widen as she slaps her hand over her neck. _“Um, Raven threw an apple at me.”_

O’s lifts an eyebrow at her friend, her lips turned up in amusement. _“Bullshit.”_

_“What? She’s done it before.”_

Octavia laughs as she gets to her feet. She opens the closet door, digging around for Clarke’s motorcycle helmet. _“Yeah. In sophomore year. When you fucked that girl that she liked.”_

 _“So.”_ Clarke grunts out as she pulls her basketball shorts off, replacing them with tight black leggings. _“It still happened.”_

 _“You deserved it. Plus she was hammered. Ah-ha!”_ O calls out, lifting a dark blue helmet in the air in triumph.

 _“Okay. Yeah, I get it, O.”_ Clarke pulls the basketball shorts back up over her leggings.

Octavia laughs, tossing the helmet over to her best friend. _“Seriously Princess. Who made that doozy on your neck?”_

_“Okay. I will tell you. But you have to promise me that you won’t give me any shit about it. I’ve already got Raven all over my back about it.”_

_“Okay. I promise I won’t give you any shit. Now spill.”_

_“Okay,”_ Clarke’s voice lowers to a whisper, _“It was Lexa.”_

_“Are you fucking kidding me Clarke!? You let her give you a hickey?”_

_“I didn’t let her. It just sort of happened.”_

_“When? While you guys were randomly making out on the couch?”_

Octavia’s eyes widen as Clarke ducks her head. She can tell by the blonde’s lack of response that she was in fact making out with the brunette.

_“Oh my god! You were totally making out, weren’t you? Clarke Griffin, you hussy.”_

_“Fuck off.”_

The two girls’ banter is cut short by the deep growl of Octavia’s stomach.

“Okay. We are so talking about this at dinner. And you’re buying, you skank.”

“I hate you.”

There is something so inherently sexy about riding a motorcycle. Even though Clarke is riding as the passenger, she still feels like a complete badass. There are only two things that Clarke doesn’t like about riding a motorcycle. One is that she hates having helmet hair. Two is that the vibrations of the bike do funny things to her insides. If Clarke’s being honest, riding on the back of Octavia’s motorcycle is kind of turning her on.

Clarke doesn’t need that to happen right now. Ever since meeting Lexa, the blonde has lived in an almost constant state of arousal that she can’t seem to satisfy. She has had countless solo sessions since she started hanging out with Lexa. She is pretty sure that Niylah would be willing to help her out, but she can’t bring herself to take that next step with the brunette. Not while she is so hung up on Lexa.

She was not planning on sleeping with Niylah earlier this afternoon, but she just got so carried away in the moment. Her head has been so messed up lately, and she doesn’t know what to do about it. It’s like she drowning, and she really wants to come up for air.  So when she kissed Niylah, she was relieved that her inner debate was somewhat silenced. She is absolutely certain that had Raven not walked in on them, she would’ve definitely had sex with Niylah.

There is no doubt in Clarke’s mind that she finds Niylah attractive, for god’s sake, she’s not blind. But it’s like her mind is completely unable to fathom being with anybody but Lexa. So she is really suffering with Lexa’s hot and cold treatment.

Octavia parks in front of the restaurant and the two women dismount the bike. Clarke adjusts her leggings, pulling the fabric out of her ass. Okay, so there are three things that she doesn’t like about being on the motorcycle. She pulls the helmet off of her head, trying to fix her now tangled hair. After a few failed attempts, she sighs and pulls her hair through the band that she keeps on her wrist.

The two women make their way into the restaurant, taking their regular booth in the back. Octavia hands Clarke a menu before grabbing one for herself.

_“So, please enlighten me on that ginormous hickey. When did this happen and how?”_

_“Wait, what are you getting?”_

_“Um, probably the green curry chicken.”_

_“Oh god that sounds good. Can we share that and the spicy lamb?”_

_“Duh. I just assumed that is what we were going to do. Now quit trying to change the subject.”_

Clarke scoffs at her best friend. _“I’m not.”_

_“Yes you are.”_

The two women stop their bickering when a waiter walks up to their table. They place their food and drink order quickly, thanking the guy before he walks away.

_“Look. It just kind of happened.”_

_“More specific. First off, when did it happen?”_

_“Last night?”_

_“Clarke, what the fuck? Why didn’t you tell me immediately? It’s part of the code to tell your best friend first.”_

_“I don’t know O. Maybe because I am fucking exhausted and I have been trying to catch up on my sleep before finals next week.”_

_“I bet you told Raven, you bitch.”_

_“That’s different. She picked me up last night and we kind of share a room.”_

_“Semantics Clarke. You always tell your best friend first.”_

_“But, you and Raven are both my best friends.”_

_“Yeah, but I’ve been around longer. I have seniority.”_

_“Is that even a thing?”_

_“You bet your sweet ass it is.”_

_“I’m sorry that I didn’t call you immediately after it happened. I went home and passed out. And I had a breakfast date with Niylah this morning.”_

Octavia lets out a cough, choking on her water. Her eyes begin to water as her cough worsens slightly. She punches her fist against her chest a few times, sucking in a deep breath of air.

 _“Wait a minute.”_ Octavia rasps out. _“You’re telling me that you went out on a date with Niylah after Lexa turned your neck into a meal? Please tell me that you covered it up before you went out.”_

_“I forgot.”_

_“Clarke!! What the hell is wrong with you?”_

_“I don’t know…”_ Clarke drops her head against the table with a groan.

 _“Clarke. Look at me.”_ Clarke reluctantly lifts her head back up, meeting her best friend’s eyes. _“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?”_

_“I honestly have no idea, O. I’m so confused.”_

_“Okay. Apparently I am way out of the loop with your life. So tell me what’s going on.”_

_“A whole lot of shit is what’s happening. You know that I have a thing for Lexa. And I have been trying to respect her wishes about us just being friends, even though I am pretty positive that she is attracted to me.”_

_“Well, duh.”_

_“So I have gone out in two dates with Niylah now.”_

_“Okay. How do you feel about her?”_

_“She’s nice.”_

_“Okay. And?”_

_“And nothing. She’s nice. We have a good time together.”_

_“I sense that there should be a but in that sentence.”_

_“But, I can’t shake my feelings for Lexa. And it’s making me become somebody that I don’t want to be.”_

_“Like how?”_

_“Like I’m using Niylah to make me forget about Lexa. I almost had sex with her this morning just because I started thinking about the kiss that got me this hickey. If Raven hadn’t of come home, I would’ve used her. And that’s not who I am.”_

_“Alright Princess. I’m just going to cut to the chase. First off, you need to break things off with Niylah. You’re not being fair to her and honestly, she’s a sweet girl. It makes me want to punch you in the tit for leading her on.”_

_“Ouch.”_

_“Well? You’d deserve it. Secondly, if you want Lexa and she is still adamant about only being your friend, then be the best fuckin’ friend that she could ever ask for. The way that girl looks at you, it’s only a matter of time before she breaks and either decides to give you a chance. Or she breaks and totally screws your brains out. Either way, you win.”_

The waiter brings out their food before Clarke can respond. The two women dig into their food, eating in complete silence. They switch plates a quarter of the way through, knowing that they will have to take about half of the food to go. Octavia breaks the silence first, asking the waiter for two to go containers. As soon as he walks away to go grab them, she starts in on Clarke again.

_“Look, I’m not trying to tell you how to live your life. I’m just saying that Niylah obviously likes you. You may think that you like her too, but you’re just projecting your feelings towards Lexa onto her. And you’re going to hurt her if you continue to string her along. So get your head out of your ass and cut that girl loose. Then, get your shit together and pursue the brunette that you really want.”_

_‘You say it like it’s that easy, O.”_

_“Because it is that easy, Clarke.”_

Clarke laughs sarcastically, twirling her knife in-between her left index and middle fingers. _“It’s really not.”_

_“What is so hard about it?”_

_“Lexa doesn’t want to take a chance on me.”_ Clarke’s voice is small, heavy with emotion.

Octavia rests her arms on the table, tucking her hands underneath her chin. _“Maybe Lexa’s not ready right now, but do you really think that gives you the right to string Niylah along?”_

_“No. You’re right.”_

_“You’re damn right I am. And I honestly feel like Lexa will eventually get her head out of her ass. You just gotta step up your game.”_

Clarke’s eyebrow furrows in confusion. _“How do you suppose I do that?”_

_“You need to romance her on the ‘DL.’ Like keep being her friend but over the top. Do supers sweet things for her. Buy her stuff of draw things for her. Doodle cute things on her coffee cup. Just mushy shit like that.”_

_“God O, you’re such a romantic.”_ Clarke rolls her eyes playfully.

_“Shut up. I’ve been in the same relationship since I was fifteen. We are so over the romancing stage.”_

_“Now I know that is a total lie.”_

_“Whatever. Look, just court her on the down low. She already likes you, it won’t take long to break her.”_

_“Court her? What is this, the nineteen twenties?”_

_“I’m serious Clarke.”_

_“Okay so say that I attempt this courting thing. What if it doesn’t work?”_

_“It will.”_

_“But what if it doesn’t?”_

_“Trust me, it will work Clarke. Girls love mushy shit.”_

_“Alright. I’ll try.”_

_“You’re damn right you’ll try. Because this shit is getting ridiculous.”_ Octavia glances down at her phone. She types something out before looking back up at Clarke. _“Lincoln is done with his training session. You ready to go?”_

_“Yeah. I guess. We need to do this more often. I feel like I never see you anymore.”_

_“We’ve been busy. School is almost out for summer. You should come home with me this year.”_

_“O, you know that I can’t. I have to save up for tuition. I’ll be working all summer.”_

_“Is that really why you won’t come home? You haven’t been home since we left.”_

_“Yeah, I know. And I don’t plan on going home anytime soon. That’s not my home anymore.”_

_“You wouldn’t even have to see Abby. Although you probably should. She’s been asking my parents to ask me about how you’re doing.”_

_“Have you told her anything?”_

_“NO. Clarke of course not.”_

_“Good, because she lost the right to know how I am when she cut me off. Can you take me home now?”_ Clarke wipes at her eyes, moving to stand up from her seat.

 _“Clarke.”_ Octavia grabs her best friend’s hand. _“I’m sorry I asked. I wasn’t trying to ruin our dinner.”_

_“Its fine, you didn’t.”_

_“Don’t fucking lie to me Griffin. How long have we known each other?”_

_“Most of our lives.”_

_“So you know that I can tell when you are lying. So cut the shit. I get it; you don’t want to see your mom. And that’s fine. I will always support your decisions. Except for the way you are handling the Lexa situation right now.”_

_“I know, you already told me. I’ll fix it.”_

_“You’d better. I don’t want to have to shove my boot up your ass.”_

_“Don’t threaten me with a good time, Blake.”_

_“Oh you know that it’s not a threat. It is a promise. Let’s go hon.”_

_“Sure, dump me for your super muscular boyfriend. I see how it is.”_

_“Well, you’ve seen him…can you blame me?”_

_“Yeah, but Lincoln is more like a brother to me, so I don’t really think about him like that.”_

_“Well yeah, but if he was a lady, you might be more interested.”_

_“No probably not. My sights are kind of locked on one lady right now.”_

_“You’re so disgustingly in love with that girl. It makes me want to ralph.”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“Let’s go.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke’s relationship with her mother had always been a little bit of a rocky one. Abby wasn’t around much when she was growing up as she was often at work. The life of a surgeon was one that required a lot of sacrifices, including watching your only daughter grow up.

Her father Jake on the other hand, chose to work from home much of the time. So growing up, she was definitely attached to her father.

Jake tried to make Clarke understand that Abby wanted to be home, that she was just trying to make a good life for them. Explaining that to a five year old girl was not easy. Jake would tell Clarke, but he wasn’t sure how much of it she actually understood.

On the rare occasion that Abby was actually home, things weren’t much different. Abby was present, but she wasn’t actively present. Jake would always make sure that they went out to do something as a family, even if it was something as simple as going to a park.

It wasn’t until Clarke started testing higher than her classmates that Abby actually started to pay attention to her daughter. She was adamant about Clarke following in her footsteps and becoming a doctor. Clarke wanted nothing more than to have her mother’s approval, so she was quick to agree to anything that was asked of her.

Truth was that she didn’t really want to be a doctor. Then again, she was only nine years old at the time. So she wasn’t really planning out the rest of her life. She just really liked drawing. And she was good at it too.

Jake loved that Clarke took after him in terms of artistic ability. Whenever he had free time with her, they would spend hours sketching things together. They spent an entire month sketching and painting the walls in Clarke’s room. By the end of the month they had transformed her bedroom into the most extensive space and forest scenes that her nine year old imagination could fathom. Abby was not happy when she found out about their artistic excursion.

When Clarke was eleven, Jake and Abby got into a car accident. A drunk driver hit the passenger side of the car while they were on their way to pick Clarke up from Octavia and Bellamy’s house. Abby had a broken collarbone and a mild concussion from hitting her head on the steering column. The Blake’s took Clarke to the hospital so that she could see her mother.

The months following Jake’s funeral were a blur. Abby increased her already demanding workload, leaving Clarke in the care of Octavia’s parents. Clarke felt kind of abandoned. She knew that her mother was mourning the loss of her dad, but so was she. She had O and Bell, but what she really wanted was her mom. Well really, she wanted her dad, but she knew that was no longer a realistic desire.

Being only eleven, she held a lot of animosity towards her mother. Yeah, it wasn’t Abby’s fault that Jake died in the car accident. But she just couldn’t understand why God would take away her father and not her mother. She knew that was a terrible thought to have, but seeing as her mom wasn’t present in her life before, she’s been completely non-existent since her dad died.

At the end of the day, those are the two reasons why Clarke changed her major from medicine to art. The fight that resulted from that phone call is something that still sits fresh in Clarke’s mind. Not only because Abby cancelled her credit card and shut down her bank account, but she withdrew her funding into Clarke’s education. Clarke got a notice that she had to pay tuition for her next semester of classes. Octavia’s parents gave her the money, refusing her promise to pay them back. Octavia helped Clarke get a job at Grounder’s.

Abby tried to reach out at the beginning. She left countless voicemails and sent text messages that went completely unanswered. After six months of trying to reach out to her daughter, Abby finally gave up and stopped calling. Clarke wasn’t ready to talk to her mother, still isn’t if she is being honest. But she can’t help but feel a small ping of hope that her mother was asking about her. Maybe one day she would be ready to try again.

**~*~*~*~*~***

When Clarke walks back into her dorm room, Raven is still not home. It is now approaching ten thirty so Clarke is pretty sure that Raven doesn’t plan on coming home tonight. She locks the door behind her before tossing her helmet on Raven’s bed. She puts her leftovers in the refrigerator, making a mental note to clean is sometime soon. She pulls her shorts and leggings off before crawling into her bed in her underwear and tank top.

Clarke grabs her phone, sending Raven a text message before she goes to bed.

 **Griffers: (10:35 p.m.)** _Hey Rae, hope you are still alive. I guess you aren’t coming home tonight. So I’m going to bed and maybe I will see you tomorrow._

 **Rae Bae: (10:35 p.m.)** _I’m still alive Princess. I’ll probably crash at Anya’s. We are both pretty beat. Anya more than me._

 **Griffers: (10:35 p.m.)** _Gross. I don’t want any details please._

 **Rae Bae: (10:36 p.m.)** _Are you sure? We can talk about The Mechanic some more._

 **Griffers: (10:36 p.m.)** _Rae!!! No thanks. Don’t you know that it’s rude to talk about your sex life with people who aren’t getting any?_

 **Rae Bae: (10:36 p.m.)** _It sure seemed like you were getting cozy with Niylah when I came in this afternoon._

 **Griffers: (10:37 p.m.)** _Yeah. Well, you stopped that from happening. Which is probably for the best._

 **Rae Bae: (10:37 p.m.)** _What? I need to know all about this. Are you working in the morning?_

 **Griffers: (10:37 p.m.)** _Yes. I work 7-1 and then I have class at 2:30._

 **Rae Bae: (10:38 p.m.)** _Okay. I’ll stop by in the morning so we can talk. Get some sleep Princess._

 **Griffers: (10:38 p.m.)** _Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow._

Clarke closes the message thread. She sets her alarm for six before plugging her phone in to charge.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke is no stranger to weird dreams. Her mind is a very active place and she frequently has vivid dreams that she later translates onto some form of medium. Her artwork is frequently made from scenes depicted in her dreams. Normally her dreams aren’t so vivid that they make her feel like she is actually living in them. This was unlike any dream that Clarke had ever had in her life. Every single thing that she felt in the dream, felt as if it was actually happening to her.

She remembers being on a space station with many of the people that were currently in her life or had been in her life at some point. She was actually locked in a prison with a lot of her friends on said space station, all of them under eighteen at the time and awaiting trial to see if they were to be put to death or not. The council on the ‘Ark’ as they called it, decided to send the hundred teenagers down to Earth to see if it was habitable for them. The teenagers were expendable since they were all considered criminals on death row anyway. They ended up attaching wristbands to the kids before sending them to certain death.

So far life on Earth was not the cake walk that they expected it to be. As it turns out, they weren’t the only people living on the ground. There was a group, ‘Grounders’ as the hundred so aptly named them that were flourishing on Earth. The group was extremely hostile towards the hundred and they ended up spearing Jasper through the chest before kidnapping him while five of the group were out scavenging for supplies.

A lot of the dream passes by in a blur. Clarke remembers meeting with Anya to try and discuss a cease fire between the hundred and the grounders. Her friends following without her knowledge got a bit trigger happy and ended up screwing up the entire meeting. Anya ends up capturing Clarke and Finn later, ordering Clarke to heal another grounder. When Clarke is unsuccessful, Anya orders Finn to be executed. Clarke ends up escaping, only to be captured later and ordered executed herself. Lincoln ends up helping Clarke escape. She thinks that the trouble is over, only for three hundred of the grounders being ordered to kill her group. They end up making locking themselves in the piece of the ‘Ark’ that they were sent down in, setting off rockets outside of their shelter that incinerates the three hundred warriors.

The most vivid part of Clarke’s dream is when she finally gets to meet her dream Lexa. The woman in front of is exuding so much authority that it makes Clarke’s knees go weak. She is seated on a throne made of branches, holding a dagger in her hand. Her eyes and cheeks are lined in kohl in what Clarke can only describe as warpaint. The warpaint only serves to make Lexa’s forest green eyes seem even more intense. Indra is standing off to the side, her stoic presence reminiscent of a predator stalking their prey. The two ‘Grounders’ speak quietly to each other in a language that Clarke doesn’t understand.

The first time that ‘Dream Lexa’ speaks to her, Clarke is pretty sure that her heart skips a few beats. Her tone of voice is almost as authoritative as her presence and when she stands in front of Clarke, the blonde forgets how to breathe. As the brunette accuses Clarke of the crime that she unwillingly committed, the only thing that she wants to do is close the small gap between them and kiss the look of accusation off of Lexa’s face.

When Clarke wakes up from her dream, she can still feel the brunette’s presence around her. Her body is buzzing with energy and her fingertips are itching with the need to create.

A loud groan leaves her mouth when she looks at her phone, according to the time; she has only been asleep for a little over four hours. She still has three hours before she has to get ready for work.

One of her finals requires her to complete a painting. She is able to choose the theme. They were to base their painting on one word of their choosing.

The word that Clarke chose was ‘Passion.’ She hadn’t decided on what exactly she was going to paint to describe her word. As soon as she woke up from her dream, she knew that had to paint Lexa. Lexa in her, what was it that Anya called her? Her ‘Heda’ form.

Clarke had spent an exorbitant amount of time memorizing Lexa’s facial features since they started hanging out. And her dream has given her even more of a chance to stare at Lexa. But she wants another point of reference. So without giving it much thought, she logs on to her Instagram account. Raven recently told her that Lexa has an account, though she is wishy washy about how often she posts new pictures. Scanning through the accounts that Raven follows, the blonde lets out a little squeal when she finds the brunette’s. Scrolling through the photographs, she sees that Raven was telling the truth. There are weeks where Lexa posts multiple pictures and weeks when she doesn’t post at all. She joined the social media outlet five years ago. She has a lot of nature pictures that Clarke assumes she took while running. There are many pictures of her with Anya and another woman that Clarke has never seen before. The woman is beautiful, her amber colored skin and honey colored eyes intrigue the blonde. The way that Lexa’s arms are wrapped around the woman leads Clarke to believe that she is somebody that is extremely important to the brunette. Maybe a close friend or an ex-girlfriend. The woman is in every single picture with Lexa, even posing in some alone.

When Clarke gets to pictures from three years ago, the other woman no longer appears in any photos. That time frame seems to be when Lexa stopped posting as often as before. When she does post, it is usually pictures of skylines or random shots of flowers. She doesn’t post selfies often anymore and when she does, Clarke can see that her smile doesn’t quite reach her eyes. There is a resonating sadness in her eyes that makes Clarke’s heart hurt.

Eager to get away from the sad pictures, Clarke scrolls up to Lexa’s more recent posts. In the past two months, Lexa has started posting more often. Her posts are still often pictures of scenery and sunsets. But now Clarke sees a pattern. Lexa has taken many pictures of the park across from the café. There are a few pictures of her favorite fountain.

The next picture that Clarke sees makes her heart start to race. It is a picture of her when she fell asleep at Lexa’s house watching the squid documentary. Clarke is bundled up in a fleece blanket, her face relaxed while she rests. There is a caption underneath the picture that says:

 **-Reshop, meizen Hainofi- #sleepingbeauty #movienightin #myfavoritebarista (Good night Beautiful Princess)**  
**NomonWoods** , **onyakomtrikru** , **MrLinkon** and seven others like this.  
**onyakomtrikru** \- Heda ste in hodnes kom Wanheda. She makes house calls now? (The Commander is in love with the Commander of Death.)  
**raebaereyes** \- I bet you that she’s drooling. Clarke drools when she sleeps.  
**NomonWoods** \- She’s cute Lex. Is this the girl that you talk about when you call?  
**HedaLeksa** \- Mom! Seriously. People can read what you write on here.

Clarke can’t fight the smile the breaks free as she reads the comments under her picture. Especially the one from Lexa’s mom. Thinking about Lexa talking about her to her mom makes Clarke’s heart speed up.

The next picture is of one of the to go cups from Grounders. Clarke had doodled a picture of a lion on the side of the cup. Underneath the cartoonish cat is a quote in Clarke’s loopy scrawl. **“It’s better to be a lion for a day than a sheep all your life.”** The caption reads:

 **-Only the Sky Princess is alert enough in the morning to come up with a coherent thought at six thirty. #earlymorningcaffeinefix #lionquotes #myfavoritebarista**  
**onyakomtrikru** , **raebaereyes** , **thebetterblake** and five others like this.  
**onyakomtrikru** \- *Gag*  
**raebaereyes** \- Commander Heart Eyes!  
**thebetterblake** \- So mushy.  
**HedaLeksa** \- You guys are assholes.  
**NomonWoods** \- That’s really cute Lex.

The next picture is a picture of Lexa and Anya standing together in front of a mirror. They are both wearing bikinis. Anya is wearing a dark red suit while Lexa’s suit is white. Clarke sucks in a breath as she drinks in the sight of Lexa in a bikini. She’s pretty sure that she is drooling but she can’t really bring herself to care. The caption reads:

 **-It’s almost summer break in California which = Being in a bathing suit for three months. If you need us, we’ll be on the beach- #bikinireadybody #soakingupthesun #bffs #summerbreak**  
**onyakomtrikru, raebaereyes, NomonWoods** and 30 others like this.  
**NomonWoods** \- You two look great!  
**raebaereyes-** GD!! You two look HAWT!  
**thebetterblake** \- Looking good ladies.  
**MrLinkon** \- @ **HedaLeksa** , are you sure that you are going to have time for the beach? Our workout plan is probably going to exhaust you.  
**HedaLeksa** \- @ **MrLinkon** , I’m sure. But good luck trying Sir. :D  
**MrLinkon** \- @ **HedaLeksa** , challenge accepted.

Clarke’s doing just fine until she gets to the last picture. Seeing Lexa in a bikini is bad enough, but she was not ready for this. She almost drops her laptop when the picture loads. Lexa is standing in front of a mirror next to Lincoln. Lexa is dressed in a dark green sports bra and tight black yoga pants. The two of them are flexing in front of the mirror. The caption reads:

 **-My new weight lifting trainer** @ **MrLinkon. He’s going to help me get RIPPED!!!- #bodygoals #working hard #iwantasixpack #victorystandsonthebackofsacrifice**  
**onyakomtrikru, thebetterblake,** **MrLinkon** and three others like this.  
**thebetterblake** \- You two are total meatheads!!  
**raebaereyes** \- Work it @ **HedaLeksa** , @ **MrLinkon**! Y’all look fine.  
**onyakomtrikru** \- Keep it in your pants @ **raebaereyes**.  
**raebaereyes** \- :D Yes dear.  
**thebetterblake** -*whipped*  
**raebaereyes** \- SHUT UP O!  
**thebetterblake** \- Hey. I calls ‘em like I sees ‘em.

Clarke laughs lightly at her friends’ banter. Her attention snaps quickly back to the picture. She ogles the pic, eyes looking Lexa up and down. She takes to memory Lexa’s defined abdominal muscles and her toned arms. The timestamp on the picture tells the blonde that this photograph was uploaded last night, around the time that she was out to dinner with Octavia. She moves the mouse over the picture, clicking on it to try and zoom in. The picture doesn’t zoom, so she isn’t able to get a good enough view of Lexa’s face to use for her painting. So with one more quick lust filled gaze at the picture, Clarke scrolls back do to some older pictures. She stops on a picture of Lexa sitting on the hood of a car. The way that she is smiling into the camera leads Clarke to believe that her girlfriend at the time was the one to take the picture.

Clarke unplugs her laptop and gets out of bed. She makes her way over to her easel, not bothering to put any pants on before taking a seat at the tall stool. She has a pad of sketch paper that she has sitting on her easel.

Clarke starts up her Spotify playlist as she sets up her laptop on her dresser. She grabs her pencil set off of the dresser. She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath as she conjures up the image of her ‘Dream Lexa.’ Pressing the tip of her pencil against the paper, she begins her practice sketch.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa wasn’t normally one for taking a nap in the afternoon time, but lately she has not been getting restful sleep. Luckily her dreams were no longer filled with the pain filled memories of Costia’s accident. So at least she wasn’t waking up screaming her ex-girlfriend’s name anymore.

No, instead her dreams were filled with more explicit images. She would fall asleep only to be woken up with a different kind of ache in her body.

She could no longer escape her thoughts of Clarke. Her thoughts were starting to bleed into her subconscious. The blonde was everywhere.

Her latest dream was a doozy. She was reading old casefiles in the library, keeping her distance from Anya and Clarke. Being a Sunday, not very many students were willing to give up time on the weekend to study. So she was one of maybe five people in the library.

About an hour into her avoidance study session, she felt her attention starting to wan. She could no longer fight back the yawns that were now escaping her mouth. The last thing that she remembered was setting her head down to take a break.

The dream started off at the end of what seemed to be a date between her and Clarke. They were dressed to the nines as they made their way back into her apartment. Opening the front door, Lexa turns to the blonde with a smile.

_“Thanks for going out with me tonight, Clarke.”_

_“Thanks for asking me to dinner. I had a good time.”_

_“I did to.”_

_“Well.” “Do you want to come in for a little while?”_ The two women chuckle as they accidently speak over each other.

_“What’d you ask Lexa?”_

_“Oh, um. I asked if you wanted to come in for a little bit.”_

_“Sure.”_

Lexa smiles at the blonde as she holds open the door for her. Clarke smiles at the brunette as she steps into the apartment. Lexa sucks in a deep breath as she catches scent of the blonde’s perfume. The intoxicating smell makes Lexa’s head swim. She walks in behind the blonde, turning her back to Clarke so she shut the door. She lets out a soft gasp as she feels Clarke’s warm breath on the back of her neck. She can feel the softest brush of lips against the skin there. A warm hand moves to rest on her hip, fingertips clinging onto the fabric of her dress. The fingers tighten as her other hip is pressed against, urging her to turn around. Lexa’s back is immediately slammed against the door as soon as she turned around. Clarke doesn’t waste any time connecting their lips, swallowing the brunette’s surprised groan. Lexa’s hands fly up to cradle Clarke’s cheeks, pulling the blonde’s lips even harder against her own. Clarke groans, her body pressing Lexa firmly into the front door. Clarke runs her tongue across Lexa’s bottom lip, eagerly seeking entrance. Lexa parts her lips slightly, groaning as Clarke’s tongue slides into her mouth. Clarke’s hands slide up and down Lexa’s hips, nails scratching at the fabric of her dress. Lexa’s hands slide into Clarke’s blonde locks, tugging softly at the soft curls. The tugging makes Clarke break the kiss with a groan, her head dropping to rest in the crook of Lexa’s neck. Lexa’s head falls back against the door as Clarke’s teeth scrape against the corded muscle of her neck.

_“God, Clarke.”_

Lexa can feel Clarke’s lips smile against her neck before she bites down on the fluttering pulse. Clarke’s eager hands trail up Lexa’s back, stopping to rest on the zipper of her dress.

 _“Can I?”_ Clarke’s voice is questioning, her mouth sliding up to nip at Lexa’s earlobe.

 _“Yyyyes..”_ Lexa’s voice teeters off into a moan as Clarke runs her tongue up the tip of Lexa’s ear.

Impatient fingers slide the zipper down as Clarke’s lips return to Lexa’s neck. Her hands don’t linger, immediately grasping the fabric to slide it down Lexa’s shoulders. The dress pools around Lexa’s waist, revealing the brunette’s tanned skin. Clarke lets out a moan as her eyes wander over Lexa’s newly exposed skin. Her eager fingers trail down the brunette’s body, brushing the sides of Lexa’s breasts. Her fingernails scrape softly across Lexa’s abdomen, reveling in the way her muscles twitch underneath her ministrations. She licks and nips at Lexa’s neck, claiming the skin with her teeth. Lexa moans, tilting her head to offer Clarke more access. Clarke’s hands grasp at the brunette’s hips, pulling impatiently at Lexa’s dress. Lexa drops her hands to the fabric to aid the blonde in pulling the dress down her legs. When the fabric pools at her feet, Lexa kicks it off to the side. Clarke pulls away from Lexa so that she can look the brunette up and down. She tucks her bottom lip between her teeth, groaning at the sight before her. Lexa’s eyes are wide, pupils blown with desire.

 _“Lex.”_ Clarke moans, her voice husky with arousal. _“You’re so beautiful.”_

Clarke surges forward to press her lips against Lexa’s. Clarke pulls away before Lexa can deepen the kiss, her lips pressing urgent kisses against the brunette’s skin. Her lips kiss every inch of skin that they can reach, leaving reddened marks in her wake. Her tongue trails down Lexa’s sternum, dipping into Lexa’s bellybutton.

 _“Jesus Clarke.”_ Lexa moans out, head thrashing against the wood of the door.

Clarke’s eyes flit up to look at the brunette, moaning as her mouth continues its journey. She leaves a love bite on either side of Lexa’s bellybutton as she kneels in front of Lexa. She slips her fingers under the waistband of Lexa’s underwear, sliding the fabric down the brunette’s legs. She peppers kisses on Lexa’s inner thighs, scraping her teeth across the soft flesh.

 _“Please stop teasing me.”_ Lexa’s voice is broken and desperate.

Clarke takes pity on the brunette, gripping Lexa’s left leg to lift it over her shoulder. Her mouth moves up to press against Lexa’s core, tongue darting out to experimentally run through the brunette’s folds.

 _“Fuck!!”_ Lexa starts, head snapping up off of the table.

Waking up in the library after such a dream led to a very uncomfortable walk home. Raven and Anya were holed up in Anya’s bedroom, enjoying themselves by the sounds of it. So that left Lexa to her own devices. She tried taking a cold shower, but she was so turned on that it did little to quell her arousal. That led to the brunette turning the water to hot so she could indulge in yet another solo session while thinking about the blonde bombshell. After leaving the shower, she was only more keyed up, so she opted to go for a run. This led to her thought about having Lincoln help train her. She needed a new avenue to work out her frustrations, seeing as her normal jogs were no longer helping tire her out. She reached out to Octavia to get ahold of Lincoln so that she could figure out his training schedule. He was open to setting up a training schedule with Lexa, as long as she was willing to do something for him in return. He wanted a running partner for his morning jogs. Lexa was all too willing to join him, since Anya had stopped running with her when she met Raven.

Their first training session was set up for that night. Lexa was eager to begin her weight training. Hopefully the aggressive work out would help exhaust her to the point of having no more sexually fueled dreams of her friend.

Having dreams about Clarke was really starting to make it hard to be around the blonde. She knew that her feelings towards her friend were starting to get out of her control and she felt her willpower slipping. She desperately hoped that her training sessions with Lincoln would help keep her mind off of her growing feelings.

When they got to the campus gym, Lincoln insisted that they take a selfie in front of the mirror. Well really, Lincoln wanted Lexa to take a selfie, that way she had a ‘before’ picture. The only way that she was willing to take a picture was if he would take one with her. So they posed jokingly in front of the mirror, arms flexing to show off their muscles. Lexa laughed at the picture before uploading it to her Instagram account with the caption: **-My new weight lifting trainer** @ **MrLinkon. He’s going to help me get RIPPED!!!- #bodygoals #working hard #iwantasixpack #victorystandsonthebackofsacrifice.**

Lincoln wasn’t joking when he said that he wouldn’t take it easy on Lexa. He planned a vigorous regimen for her first work out. Seeing as she only wanted to tone her muscles and not bulk up like crazy, he set up a plan with multiple repetitions using light amounts of weight.

By the end of her workout, she was pretty sure that she was going to die. Her body was exhausted from the weight lifting. It probably didn’t help that she had opted to run earlier in the day. She couldn’t hide her distaste when Lincoln suggested a run in the morning. She was quick to relent however, seeing as he wasn’t charging her for their sessions. Lincoln gave Lexa a meal plan to help add protein to her diet and the parted after making plans for the morning.

The apartment was quiet when Lexa walked in. Lexa sighed in relief, glad for the silence. She takes a quick shower before heading off to bed, hoping that she manages to sleep through the night this time.

Lexa woke up with a loud groan, her sore muscles seizing up and sending sharp jolts of pain through her body. She knew that delayed onset muscle soreness was something that had a tendency to happen when somebody first starts weight lifting, but she figured that she did an adequate amount of stretching beforehand.

She doesn’t want to get out of bed today, not one bit. But she has class today, and she promised Lincoln that they could go on a run before her nine a.m. class. She grabs her phone to send him a wake up text message. She has a bunch of new notifications from her Instagram account. She sends a text to Lincoln telling him to come over to her apartment when he is ready. As soon as he replies with an affirmative, she opens her Instagram app.

Scrolling through her notifications, she has to choke back a laugh as she reads through Anya and Raven’s banter. Those two girls’ are too much. The last two notifications make her suck in a deep breath.

Raven, Anya, Lincoln, Octavia, her mom and one of her friends from high school all liked the picture last night after she posted it. The picture was liked again early this morning by @ **princessgriffers**. Seeing the username makes Lexa’s heart start to race. She can’t be positive, but she is pretty sure that this user name belongs to her favorite barista. The next notification is also enough to make her dizzy. It reads: @ **princessgriffers** is now following you.

So much for getting her mind off of Clarke.

**TBC**

**WELL?? What did you guys think? Hit me up. Until next time.**


	9. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of things happen!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay beautiful humans. Here is your next chapter. I apologize for the delay. I got busy this week. But I hope that the super long update is enough to make up for the lateness. I hope that you guys enjoy this chapter as it was a doozy to write.
> 
> It does get really angsty for a minute. So you may want to keep tissues handy. I hope that you guys enjoy and feel free to let me know on here or on my Tumblr @jeffrinamichelle. Thanks for reading y’all!
> 
> A huge shout out to my Beta Randomme103. She puts up with a lot of my shit and helps me create awesome things for you guys. So please give her a huge round of applause.
> 
> Anyway. READ ON, Awesome Nerds!

**~*Barista’s Choice*~**

 

**~*~*~*~*~***

 

 

**~*Chapter 8*~**

 

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“You’re late asshole.”_

_“I know. I am so sorry. I lost track of time.”_ Clarke says as she steps behind the counter, hastily tying her apron around her waist.

_“You’re so lucky that Indra isn’t here today.”_

_“I really didn’t mean to. I was working on one of my art finals. I have to have a piece turned in at the end of next week. I swear that I just lost track of time.”_

_“Whatever.”_ Octavia rolls her eyes at her friend as she wipes down the counter space next to the register. _“Rae’s here.”_

_“Where is she?”_

_“She’s in the backroom.”_

_“O? Seriously? Indra will probably kill both of us if she finds out that we are letting people hang out in the backroom.”_

_“Like I said, Princess. Indra is not here today. Chill.”_

_“She will probably find out.”_

_“Oh well. We’ve both been working here for three years. She loves us.”_

_“That doesn’t mean she won’t kill us.”_

_“True. Now Rae said that she was here to talk to you, so go do that before I change my mind and go take a break.”_

_“Fine.”_

Clarke walks away from the counter, making her way into the backroom. Raven is sprawled out on a pallet of burlap sacks full of coffee beans, her phone in her hand. She looks up from her phone when Clarke walks in, looking at her best friend with a smile.

_“So she lives.”_

_“Shut up Clarke.”_

_“What? You’ve been spending a lot of time over at Anya’s place lately. I almost forgot what having a roommate is like.”_

Raven gets to her feet with a groan, walking up to her best friend.

_“This isn’t about me today Princess. I came here to talk to you about yesterday.”_

_“I’m surprised that you had the time or the energy to get out of bed to see me.”_

_“Well, even Raven Reyes needs a break. Really, Anya had class this morning.”_

_“Otherwise you would probably be busy. Have you even started studying for your finals next week?”_

Raven scoffs loudly, crossing her arms over her chest with a smirk on her face. _“Bitch please. I don’t need to study. I’ve got this shit in the bag.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Yes, I’m positive. Plus it’s only Monday. I have all week to refresh on material. Now stop changing the subject.”_

_“Ugh, fine. Ask me what you want.”_

_“First off, how’s the hickey?”_

_“It’s still there.”_ Clarke tilts her neck so Raven can see the purple mark on her neck.

_“Jesus. Lexa really did a number on you. That thing does not look like it is going away any time soon.”_

_“I know….it…”_

_“I think that I will name it George.”_

_“What?”_

_“The hickey. He looks like a George to me.”_

_“What?? You are naming my hickey?”_

_“Yeah. I like George.”_

_“Okay, whatever you want, Rae.”_

_“Have you and Lexa talked at all about that not so little kiss?”_

_“No, we haven’t. We haven’t really had time to see each other since it happened and she hasn’t mentioned it in any text messages.”_

_“You should probably talk about it at some point.”_

Clarke sighs. _“Yeah I know. I was hoping that she would bring it up since she is the one that initiated it and all.”_

_“Yeah. After you made love to her finger with your tongue. I don’t blame her dude.”_

_“I know. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”_

_“Nothing’s wrong. You and Lexa are just the world’s worst friends. Like seriously. It’s bad. You two suck at it. I’ve never made out with you or with O.”_

_Okay! I get it Rae. Lexa and I are terrible at being friends. But apparently not bad enough for her to take a chance on me.”_

_“It’s going to happen. There is no way that you two will make it much longer as just friends. Both of you guys will probably spontaneously combust.”_

_“You’re probably right.”_

_“I know that I’m right. I’m fucking amazing. That’s beside the point. Talk to Lexa about the kiss before you two lose it and bang each other in public. Speaking of banging. I talked to O when I first got here and she told me that you and Niylah did not do the deed. So please enlighten me, why didn’t you and Niylah hook up?”_

_“Because you barged into the dorm to grab the mechanic so that you could go bang your girlfriend. You had to come in and run your clitorference.”_

_“Yeah but I was only in the room for fifteen minutes, tops. Why couldn’t you guys continue where you left off?”_

_“Because after you left I told her that we needed to slow down.”_

_“Why? You seemed raring to go when I walked in.”_

_“Because I was doing it for all the wrong reasons.”_

_“You’ve finally figured that out babe?”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“You’ve finally realized that you have got it bad for a certain brunette that happens to be best friends with my girlfriend. And that you were only using Niylah to help you forget about your massive lady boner for said brunette.”_

_“I….I…”_

_“No Clarke, don’t deny it. You know that it is true. And that’s okay. Lexa’s playing hot and cold with you so you’ve been confused. I’m just glad that you didn’t use Niylah. Because I honestly think that she is a sweet girl and she doesn’t deserve that.”_

_“Ugh. Why am I always the last one to figure this shit out?”_

_“Because you think with your vagina. And you are really fucking stubborn so you don’t like to listen.”_

_“What am I going to do Rae?”_

_“You just need to break things off with Niylah and talk to Lexa. And actually talk. Unless you want to give George a couple of siblings.”_

_“Really Rae? You think that we are incapable of just talking to each other?_

_“Well I mean. The evidence is on your neck right now.”_

_“Shut up. Can you just not mention George again.”_

_“Okay fine. Take away all my fun. Talk to her.”_

_“She’s not going to change her mind Raven.”_

_“Don’t be so sure. I think that she is suffering just as much as you are. You just need to know that there is a reason that she is like this. She will tell you if you just talk to her.”_

_“If you say so.”_

_“I know these things. Now I gotta scoot. I have class in thirty minutes.”_

_“Alright, are you coming home tonight?”_

_“I don’t know. I want to say yes, but you know.”_

_“Please try. I know that you have Anya now but I just miss you.”_

_“Ahh. Clarke. I’ll make sure that I come home tonight.”_

_“Okay. Now get out of here so I can get to work before O kicks my ass. I was late this morning.”_

_“Why were you late? You are always on time.”_

_“I had a dream last night.”_

_“Oh? Was it a sexy dream?”_

_“No. It just gave me the inspiration for my final painting.”_

_“So you were late because you’ve been painting?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“I am actually surprised that you came out of the room. Usually you lock yourself away when inspiration hits.”_

_“Yeah well, I still need to make money.”_

_“True. Anyway I have to go for real this time. I will see you later boo.”_

_“Bye Rae.”_ Clarke wraps her arms around her best friend’s waist, pulling her in for a tight hug.

 _“Bye Clarkey.”_ Raven runs her hand through Clarke’s hair, her fingers tangling slightly in the blonde locks. _“You have paint in your hair.”_

 _“Shit.”_ Clarke runs her fingers through her hair, wincing when she catches snags from the paint. She pulls the tangled mess into a bun, tying it back hastily.

_“I actually might stay with Anya tonight. I feel like you are about to hit your scary creation mode. I don’t want to get in your way.”_

_“No. It’s fine.”_

_“Clarke. You have paint in your hair. You have that crazy look in your eyes that you get when you’re itching to paint. You were late for work.”_

_“I know. I just had this dream and I didn’t want to forget it. So I had to get it down on paper.”_

_“And that’s fine. I know how you get. You need the space to create. Last semester you made me stay at O’s place for a week and a half. Just remember to eat and sleep okay? And call me if you need anything. If I don’t hear from you by Friday, I will come to the dorm to collect your dead body.”_

_“Alright. But we have to hang out this weekend. I’m serious about missing you, Rae.”_

_“We’ll go out and get drunk at the bar or something.”_

_“Sounds good.”_

_“Okay. I have to go or I’m going to be late.”_

_“Go, go.”_

_“Bye Princess.”_

_“Bye!”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Raven didn’t intend on spending so much time away from her dorm. She knew that she was kind of being neglectful of her best friend by spending so much time with Anya. She definitely misses being around Clarke, but her attention has been so enraptured by the other blonde. She was falling hard and fast for the other woman. And really she should be terrified with how fiercely she feels towards Anya, but she doesn’t. She’s almost positive that she is well on her way to falling in love with her and she couldn’t be happier about it.

So really she’s kind of glad that Clarke is about to go into one of her self-imposed creative lockdowns. It makes her feel less crappy to be away from her friend when she goes through one of these phases.

Love. She rolls that word around on her tongue. Is she in love with Anya? They haven’t been together for very long. It took her years to fall in love with Finn, and that didn’t turn out to work in her favor. She doesn’t regret it though because being with Finn brought her the two best friends that she has ever had. Finn cheating on her with Clarke was actually one of the best things that could’ve happened to Raven.

That was until she starting seeing Anya. Raven was completely enamored with the other woman from the very first time she saw her. It took Finn a year to even get Raven to agree to go out on a date with him. She hopped into bed with Anya within an hour of meeting her.

Just thinking about the other woman makes Raven’s heart pick up pace, thudding a rapid beat against her ribcage. Her palms start to get sweaty and mouth gets really dry.

Fuck. If that isn’t love then she isn’t sure what is.

She’s pretty sure that it is way too early in their relationship to even fathom dropping that huge revelation onto her girlfriend’s shoulders. She doesn’t want to scare the other woman away letting those three words slip.

Being in class was pretty much a waste today, her mind too focused on her newly proclaimed confession. Well, proclaimed to herself anyway. It’s a good thing that they were just going over the outline for their final next week. She felt confident about this final and she was sure that she would ace it. Otherwise she might be a little bit freaked out by her inability to listen this morning. All because of three tiny words that hold an incredible meaning behind them.

She feels her nerves picking up as she walks up to Anya’s front door. She takes a minute to school her features before lifting her hand to knock. Anya opens the door almost immediately, dressed in a pair of ripped jeans and a short sleeved button up. Her hair is down, messy blonde strands tucked behind her ears. Her face lights up with a huge grin when she takes in the sight of the brunette in front of her. Raven steps forward to capture Anya’s lips with her own, moaning against her girlfriend’s soft mouth. As they break apart, she rests her forehead against Anya’s.

_“Mmm. Hey babe.”_

_“Hey yourself.”_ Anya steps to the side to allow Raven room to walk in. She closes the door behind her as she follows Anya into the living room, dropping her backpack on the floor next to the couch. The two women settle on the couch, Raven curling her body into Anya’s side. Anya’s arm immediately curls around Raven’s shoulders, pulling the brunette tightly against her.

_“How’s your day been?”_

_“Uneventful. I hate the week before finals.”_

_“Same. It feels like a waste of time to even go to class. I already know the material, why am I even here?”_

_“Right? How was class for you?”_

_“Boring. I didn’t really pay much attention. I was thinking about this blonde girl that I know.”_

_“Oh yeah? Anybody I know?”_

_“I don’t think so. You’d like her, I think.”_

_“Probably not. If my girlfriend is thinking of her instead of me.”_

_“Oh my god, you’re such a dork.”_

_“But I’m your dork.”_

_“Yes, yes you are. So I have a question for you.”_

_“Shoot.”_

_“So Clarke is working on one of her finals.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Well she gets kind of crazy when she gets in the groove.”_

_“I’m still following.”_

_“So she gets pretty scary and territorial. And frankly, she scares the shit out of me.”_

_“Clarke? The Sky Princess scares you?”_

_“Yes. She gets insane when she is working on a piece. Like, sleep deprived, living off of pop tarts and red bull kind of crazy.”_

_“Raven, just ask me what you want.”_

_“Can I maybe stay over here until Clarke is done with her painting?”_

_“Of course you can.”_

_“Awesome. I brought some clothes in my backpack.”_

_“Cool. I actually um…”_ Anya starts, pulling away from Raven. _“I um, cleared out one of my drawers for you this morning.”_

_“Wh…what? You did what?”_

_“I cleared out a drawer for you. I mean it’s totally too soon isn’t it? I…forget I said anything.”_

Raven lifts her head off of Anya’s shoulder, pressing her lips against the blonde’s jaw.

 _“Babe. No. It’s fine. It’s awesome actually. I love y…”_ Raven clears her throat loudly. _“I love that you emptied a drawer for me. It’s not too soon. I’m totally not freaked out, I promise.”_

Anya’s brings her hand up to cup Raven’s chin, turning her face so that she can press their lips together. Raven slides her leg over Anya’s lap, straddling the other girl without breaking their kiss. Raven’s hands slide through Anya’s hair, pulling the blonde’s mouth firmly against her own. Anya’s hands toy with the hem of Raven’s shirt, her nails scratching at the skin underneath. Raven moans against Anya’s lips, the blonde immediately seizing the opportunity to slide her tongue into her girlfriend’s mouth. Anya’s hands slide under Raven’s shirt, pulling the fabric up her back.

_“Hey! No sex on the couch!”_

Raven lets out a squeak, sliding off of Anya’s lap, her shirt still halfway up her body. The brunette slumps over on the other side of the couch with her back facing Lexa. Lexa is standing in front of the couch with her hands on her hips. She is dressed in a pair of leggings and a sports bra. She eyes her two friends warily, eyebrow quirked in disbelief.

_“We had an agreement about the couch, Anya.”_

_“Don’t be such a party pooper Lexa.”_

_“Wait a second.”_ Raven questions, turning to face Lexa. She sits up, pulling her shirt back down, smoothing out the wrinkles. _“You should be one to talk Lexa.”_

 _“Oh my god.”_ Anya’s eyes widen, a huge smile breaking out on her face. _“You little fucker. You don’t get to yell at me about making out on the couch. Miss, I gave Clarke a huge hickey on her neck. On this very couch!”_

 _“Shut up.”_ Lexa’s face reddens.

_“You did do quite a number on my best friend Lexa. That hickey is massive.”_

_“Oh my god. I can’t deal with you two assholes right now. I’m going to go train with Lincoln.”_

_“Have fun. Put another selfie on Instagram so Clarke has some spank bank material.”_

_“Raven! Jesus.”_

_“I’m just saying. You’re hot. Flaunt it.”_

_“Lex. Raven is going to stay over here for a few days.”_

_“Um. Okay. I was pretty sure that you had already asked her to move in. I mean she’s always here.”_

_“Well I haven’t asked her to move in weirdo. But she is going to stay over for a few days. Clarke is feeling inspired and she locked herself in the dorm.”_

_“Is that really safe?”_

_“What?”_

_“For Clarke to lock herself in the dorm room for god knows how long?”_

_“She does this sometimes. I make sure to keep a crap ton of ramen and pop tarts in the dorm for times like these.”_

_“That’s not healthy.”_

_“Yeah probably not. But she gets like crazy scary when she gets inspired. It’s safer to leave her alone and let her do her thing. She doesn’t stay cooped up for longer than a week.”_

_“I don’t like this.”_

_“I’m serious Lexa, she gets crazy. Just let her work it out. She’ll be fine. If she doesn’t come out of the room by Friday, I’ll go over and make sure that she’s still alive.”_

_“Fine. I gotta run. But I still don’t like the idea of her being locked in her room for days on end.”_

_“You’ll deal with it. Because she won’t listen to you.”_

_“Ugh. That girl is stubborn.”_

_“You should talk Heda.”_

_“Shof op. I’m out of here. Later losers. Don’t bang on the couch.”_ Lexa turns away from the two girls, making her way to the front door. She grabs her keys off of the hook by the door as she walks out of the apartment.

_“Whatever. Just remember the hickey.”_

_“Hate you!!!”_ Lexa calls from outside the door, causing both girls to break out in giggles.

 _“Hmmm. Where were we?”_ Raven lifts her shirt over her head, tossing the fabric to the floor. She lies back against the armrest of the couch, crooking her finger towards Anya in a ‘come hither’ motion. Anya crawls over towards her girlfriend, settling her hips between Raven’s legs. She rests her body against Raven’s as she leans in to press their lips together.

**~*~*~*~*~**

Lexa’s trying not to freak out. She really is. But she hasn’t heard from Clarke in three days. She’s tried to text the blonde numerous times since Raven told her about Clarke’s self-imposed lockdown on Monday. Clarke answered the first few messages that Lexa sent on Monday, but Lexa hasn’t heard from the blonde in three days. And she is incredibly worried.

She hopes like hell that Clarke is in the café when she walks in Thursday afternoon. She is wearing a pair of tight blue jeans and a white tank top. She had Clarke’s red hoodie on earlier, but the outside air has warmed considerably. So, she opted to tie the hoodie around her waist on her way to the café. She opted to leave her hair down today, wavy brunette curls framing her face. She was too lazy to put her contacts in or put makeup on, leaving her spectacled and fresh faced. Octavia is behind the counter making a drink for somebody. Lexa smiles when she gets up to the counter, trying to calm her pounding heart. When Octavia looks up from the machine, she smiles softly at the brunette. She calls the customer’s name out and hands him his drink before walking up to Lexa.

_“Hey Lexa. What’s up?”_

_“Have you heard from Clarke?”_

_“Wow. It’s nice to see you too, you dick.”_

_“I’m sorry that was rude. Hi Octavia, How are you?”_

_“I’m good Lexa. Stressing a little bit because of finals. I have not slept in almost forty eight hours because I’ve been studying. Other than that, I’m fine. How are you?”_

_“I’m good. Not really worried about finals. I’m ready for them. But seriously, have you heard from Clarke?”_

_“Um, no. I mean she is in her dorm. I know that much. But she’s locked in and she doesn’t answer her phone when she gets like this.”_

_“I’m kind of really worried about her. She was texting me on Monday but she isn’t answering now.”_

_“And she won’t. Raven gave her until tomorrow. She’ll be done. She’s fine.”_

_“I just need to go see for myself.”_

_“Well, you can try. She locks herself in her room and is usually so zoned out that she doesn’t hear the door.”_

_“Well I have to make sure she is still alive.”_

_“Okay. Well I’m going to make you a drink to take to her; maybe she will be more inclined to let you in if you bring her caffeine. Because she probably hasn’t had anything but Red Bull for the past three days.”_

_“Okay. Well can I get a caramel….”_

_“Lexa, I know that Clarke has been making your drinks for a bit, but I still remember your order. Give me a few minutes.”_

Lexa pulls a ten dollar bill out of her jeans as Octavia turns away to make the drinks. She places the money on the counter.

_“I’m going to run across the street really quickly.”_

Octavia nods her head at the brunette in understanding. Lexa walks out of the café, jogging across the street. Maya is standing at the podium when she walks in, an easy smile on her face.

_“Hello Lexa, welcome back.”_

_“Thank you.”_

_“How can I help you today?”_

_“Can I get an order to go?”_

_“Sure. What would you like?”_

_“Um, can I get a turkey club sandwich and an order of those pancakes that Clarke likes?”_

_“Yeah. Sure. Let me go put that in really quick. Shouldn’t take very long.”_

_“Take your time.”_

Lexa sits down on the bench next to the podium, pulling her cell phone out of her jeans. She opens her candy crush app. She gets through three levels before Maya brings out a bag filled with their food. Lexa reaches in her pocket to grab her debit card. Maya hands her the bag with a smile.

_“How much do I owe you?”_

_“Don’t worry about it Lexa.”_

_“No way. I can’t take free food.”_

_“Yes you can.”_

_“No Maya.”_

_“Look. Clarke does a lot for Jasper and Monty. She works really hard and works a lot of hours at the bar. She has a lot going on having to pay her own tuition. Between classes and working all of the time, I don’t understand how she does it. So just take her some food, it’s totally fine.”_

_“Alright. Thank you.”_

_“You’re welcome. Just take care of that girl please. She’s a sweetheart.”_

_“Yes she is. I’ll see you later Maya.”_

_“Bye Lexa.”_

Lexa turns away with a small wave, making her way out of the diner. She walks quickly back to the café, cringing at the loud chime of the door. She makes her way back up to the counter to grab the drinks. Octavia looks up from her phone, eyeing the brunette with a smile.

_“Where’d you go?”_

_“I went to get Clarke some food from the diner.”_

_“What did you get for her?”_

_“The diabetes pancakes that she likes.”_

_“Oh man. She’s going to be so excited.”_

_“I hope so. Thanks for the drinks.”_

_“You’re welcome. I left your change by the register.”_

_“Oh no, that’s okay. The rest of it was for you.”_

Octavia narrows her eyes playfully. _“Tying to buy my acceptance, Woods?”_

_“What? No…”_

_“I’m just pulling your leg. Now go make sure that my best friend is still alive.”_

Lexa mockingly salutes Octavia _“You got it, Captain.”_

 _“Get outta here.”_ Octavia chuckles, shaking her head at the other girl. _“Oh wait. Here take this.”_ Octavia reaches into her jean pocket, grabbing out a set of keys. She removes one of the keys off of the ring and hands it to the brunette. Lexa looks at the key questioningly. _“It’s for Clarke’s dorm room. Just in case she doesn’t answer the door.”_

Lexa pockets the key and grabs the two drinks off of the counter before leaving the café.

The walk to Clarke’s dorm is slow going, Lexa’s hands full of food and coffee. She should’ve borrowed Anya’s car, but she’s just so used to walking everywhere that she forgets that she even has one.

By the time she makes it to the blonde’s dorm, she is going crazy with worry. She has a feeling that Clarke hasn’t left her room in days. And if she is locked in her room, she probably hasn’t been sleeping or eating really. She sucks in a deep breath as she walks up to Clarke’s front door. She steels her resolve before reaching up to knock on the door. Only to remember that her hands are full with the food and coffee. She wracks her brain to figure out how to knock on the door without having to set something on the ground. She opts for kicking the door, her black Dr. Marten’s smacking against Clarke’s door. She can hear soft music playing on the other side. Fearing that the blonde might not be able to hear her, Lexa’s next kick is harder, resulting in a loud thud against the door.

_“Clarke???”_

After not receiving an answer, Lexa kicks the door one more time. She sighs loudly, bending over to set one of the coffee cups down. She pulls the key that Octavia gave her out of her jeans, using it to unlock Clarke’s front door. Opening the door, she sticks the key between her teeth so she can grab the coffee cup.

The sight in front of her as she walks in is slightly alarming. Clarke’s back is to her, her body situated on a stool in front of an easel. Her posture is bent as she leans in towards the canvas. She has a paintbrush tucked behind her ear and another one in her hand. She swipes the brush against the canvas effortlessly.

The floor around her is covered with empty blue and silver Red Bull cans and what look like crumpled up Ramen wrappers. Lexa sets the coffee and food on Raven’s bedside table, pulling her cell phone out of her pocket. She opens the camera app to snap a picture of the Clarke’s side of the room. Uploading the picture to her Instagram she tags @ **princessgriffers** with the caption:  
**-I don’t know if I will be able to find Clarke in this mess.- #anartistsnaturalhabitat #hopefullysheisstillalive**

Clarke’s current condition isn’t much better. She is wearing a pair of black leggings and black tank top. The clothes are rumpled, as if she has been wearing them for a few days. Her hair is everywhere, tangled locks decorated with many different colors. The uncovered skin on Clarke’s body is covered in paint.

She looks like an absolute mess, and Lexa loves it.

Moving her eyes away from the blonde, she looks at the canvas that Clarke is currently decorating. She barely manages to bite back as gasp as she sees the painting.

It’s most definitely a painting of her. She looks fierce, eyes ablaze with passionate fury. She is sitting on a throne made of twisted branches from a tree. One of her hands is gripping the handle of a blade, the tip of which is digging into her index finger on the other hand. Her curly brown hair is tied back, braids weaving throughout it. Her face is decorated in what seems so be war paint, kohl around her eyes.

The most surprising part of the painting to Lexa, aside from how much of a likeness Clarke has managed to capture, is the golden gear jewel that is adorning her portrait’s forehead. The jewel is an exact depiction of the necklace that Lexa can feel pressing against the skin of her chest.

The necklace was a graduation gift from Costia. Lexa has never taken it off, aside from removing it in order to shower. The cool metal of the gear often rests against her heart, reminding her of love long lost. She can feel her heart clench painfully in her chest as she watches Clarke paint the jewel a brilliant gold color.

She watches the blonde in her element, not wanting to disrupt her groove. Clarke moves effortlessly across the canvas, stopping only to change colors on the palette. Lexa quickly snaps a picture of the blonde. The tip of Clarke’s tongue is poking out of her mouth in concentration. Lexa looks at the picture, giggling slightly as she uploads it to Instagram. She tags @ **princessgriffers** in the photo and adds the caption:  
**-I found her guys. She’s still alive.- #awildbaristaappears #shouldIpokeher #Imkindofscared**

When she realizes that Clarke isn’t likely to stop soon, she makes the difficult decision to make her presence known. Clearing her throat softly so she doesn’t scare Clarke, Lexa walks deeper into the bedroom. Clarke’s posture straightens out as she twists her body to face the brunette. Clarke’s eyes are wild but focused, dark bags prominent underneath her bright blue eyes. Clarke’s tired face immediately turns up in a bright smile.

 _“Hey Lexie.”_ Clarke’s voice is raspy, cracking slightly from not being used.

_“Hey Clarke. I came to check on you.”_

_“Yeah. I can see that.”_

_“I was worried about you.”_

_“Were you really?”_

_“Yes. Raven told me that you go into these creative lockdowns every once in a while. But I was worried because you weren’t answering my text messages.”_

_“Yeah. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you. I just had to create. And I have a final due on Monday.”_

_“Is that what this is?”_ Lexa gestures to the canvas.

Clarke’s eyes widen as her sluggish mind catches up with her. The giant portrait on her canvas. That is most definitely of Lexa. Lexa, who is currently standing less than five feet away from her. Staring at the painting. Clarke quickly stands, putting her body in front of the canvas to try and block Lexa’s view. She sways slightly on her feet as the blood rushes to her aching limbs.

_“Yeah. Look, I know that this is like a total invasion of your privacy and I should’ve asked you before I started painting a portrait of you. But I had this dream and I just got really inspired and I had to paint my dream. And God just kill me now.”_

_“Clarke.”_

_“Hmmm?”_

_“I want to see it, please.”_

_“What?”_

_“The painting. I would like to look at it if you don’t mind.”_

_“Oh! No! Of course. It’s still wet though.”_

_“Okay. I’m not going to touch it, I promise.”_

Clarke moves out of the way. Lexa walks up to the easel. Her forest green eyes lock on the beautifully painted canvas in front of her. The likeness that Clarke has managed to capture is scarily accurate. She almost feels like she is looking into a mirror. Lexa can feel her eyes sting with tears, threatening to fall. The emotion that Clarke has captured is enough to make Lexa’s knees feel weak. She so badly wants to run her fingers across the canvas, not to ruin the picture. Just to make sure that she isn’t dreaming.

When she turns back to face Clarke, her eyes are wide with wonder and glossy from the build-up of tears.

_“Clarke. This is beautiful.”_

_“Thank you.”_

_“I can’t believe how much detail you’ve managed to put into it. You are so talented.”_

Clarke’s gaze drops to her feet, her cheeks reddening to a rosy hue. _“Stop. It’s not that good.”_

_“Please. It’s an amazing portrait, Clarke. You are a great artist.”_

_“Thank you Lexie.”_

_“You’re welcome.”_

_“So what brings you here to my not so humble abode?”_

Lexa shifts her feet uncomfortably, her eyes locked on the blonde in front of her. _“I told you. I was worried, so I came to check on you.”_

_“Oh. Well. I’m fine. I’m almost done actually.”_

_“Well, do you have time for a break?”_

_“I mean, I guess so.”_

_“Awesome. I brought you some coffee and some food.”_

_“Oh you are an angel.”_

_“Hardly.”_

_“We will have to agree to disagree. What did to bring for food?”_

_“Um. I brought you those pancakes that you like from the diner.”_

_“Are you serious?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Oh my god. I’m pretty sure that I love you.”_ Clarke squeaks, clapping a hand over her mouth. _“I mean…”_

_“It’s fine. Are you ready to eat?”_

_“Yes. I am starving.”_

_“I can imagine. Judging by the current status of your floor, I’d say that you only had Red Bull and Ramen over the past three days.”_

_“Well, yeah. That’s what I usually do. And I had some Pop Tarts for breakfast this morning.”_

_“When is the last time that you slept?”_

_“I took a two hour nap earlier today.”_

_“And before that?”_

_“Um. Sunday night?”_

_“Clarke! You need to sleep once in a while.”_

_“I do sleep. I am just on a time crunch for his project.”_

_“Well. I think that you have time for a break. Maybe a nap too.”_

_“We’ll see.”_

Lexa rolls her eyes playfully at the blonde. She unties Clarke’s hoodie and drapes it across the stool. _“We will make time. Go sit down and I will grab your food.”_

_“Sha Heda.”_

Lexa’s mouth drops open in shock at the blonde’s words.

_“What did you say?”_

_“Sorry. I don’t know what it means. I heard it in my dream. I hope that it doesn’t mean anything bad. Like dream you said something to dream Indra. And that was her response.”_

_“No it doesn’t mean anything bad. It’s just really weird.”_

_“What’s so weird about it?”_

_“Okay. So this might sound strange but…what you just said is actually in the language that Anya and I made up when we were kids.”_

_“Are you kidding me?”_

_“No I swear. What you just said to me is, yes Commander. And it’s funny because Anya calls me Commander all the time.”_

_“Hmmm. That’s really weird.”_

_“Yeah it is. Maybe you overheard Anya talking to me at some point and it just kinda translated into a dream.”_

_“Yeah, maybe.”_ The two women are interrupted by the loud rumble of Clarke’s stomach. _“I’m apparently hungry.”_

_“Oh yeah. Go ahead and sit down. Let me grab your food.”_

_“Thanks.”_

Clarke moves towards her bed, taking a seat on the edge of it. Lexa grabs the food and drinks off of Raven’s table before walking towards the blonde’s bed. She hands the cup marked ‘Princess’ to Clarke as she takes a seat across from her. Lexa takes a sip of the still warm coffee and settles the cup in her lap. She hands the Styrofoam container that is marked ‘cakes’ to Clarke, before opening her own food.

Lexa has only taken two bites of her sandwich when her eyes land on Clarke’s neck. The blonde’s head is tilted down slightly as she eats, so her attention is not focused on Lexa. Lexa takes a minute to openly stare at the mark on Clarke’s neck. It has lightened slightly since the night that Lexa put it there, but it is still very noticeable.

Lexa knows that they need to talk about what happened. The idea of bringing it up makes her stomach churn with nerves. But she can feel the awkward tension in the air. And she knows that it will only worsen if they don’t talk about it. She takes a deep breath, setting her section of sandwich back into the Styrofoam container.

_“Hey Clarke?”_

_“Hmm?”_ Clarke lifts her eyes to meet Lexa’s gaze as she continues to chew her bite of pancake.

_“We should probably talk about…”_

_“About what?”_ Clarke sets her fork down, turning her full attention to the brunette.

 _“About, you know…”_ Lexa taps her neck with her finger to gesture towards Clarke’s neck.

 _“Oh. You mean the giant hickey that you left on my neck?”_ Clarke says playfully.

_“Um..yeah that.”_

_“Well. What is there to say about it really?”_

_“Firstly, I want to apologize for doing that to you. I lost control of my actions.”_

_“Lexa. It’s fine. I was definitely not complaining.”_

_“Yeah, but it’s not appropriate behavior for friends.”_

_“Well. We aren’t very good at being friends. If you haven’t noticed.”_

_“No. I’ve noticed. Look Clarke, I shouldn’t have done that.”_

_“I already said that it’s fine, Lex.”_

_“I just don’t want to blur the lines between us anymore than they already are.”_

_“I’m not sure what you mean.”_

Lexa runs her fingers through her hair, mentally working out her next sentence. She doesn’t want to upset Clarke and she knows that she needs to tread carefully with her words.

_“Clarke. I….I don’t want to give you the wrong idea. It’s no secret that I am extremely attracted to you. You’re gorgeous. You are amazingly kind. And you are a great friend. I just…I can’t. I’m not ready to be with somebody. Not yet.”_

_“I can respect that Lexa. And I feel the same way about you. I want nothing more than for you to give me a chance. Because I really think that we could have something great. But I won’t push you if you aren’t ready. I just can’t promise that I will be able to wait until you are ready. What if somebody else comes along?”_

The idea of losing Clarke to somebody else makes Lexa’s chest tighten. But knowing that she might never be ready to commit the way that Clarke deserves is what combats the overwhelming sense of jealousy simmering inside of her body.

_“I’m not asking you to wait. I can’t promise that I will ever be ready to try with somebody else again. If I ever get to that point, you are absolutely the person that I want to try with. More than anything. But if somebody else can give you what I can’t, don’t wait for me.”_

_“But I don’t want to lose you.”_

_“You won’t Clarke. Even if I can’t be with you, I will always be your friend. I can promise you that much.”_

_“You’d better be dammit.”_ Clarke’s words are laced with sadness as she turns her attention back to her food.

Lexa drops the subject for now. She knows that Clarke is starting to get upset and she doesn’t want to taint the short amount of time that she gets to spend with the blonde. She knows that they haven’t resolved everything between them, but the air doesn’t feel as awkward as it did before. With a despondent sigh, Lexa picks up her sandwich and continues to eat it. They continue to eat in silence, both women seemingly lost in their thoughts. Lexa is barely halfway through her sandwich as Clarke is taking her last bite. Clarke closes the container and sets it on her bedside table. She rubs at her full belly with a sigh as she lies back against her headboard.

“Oh my god. I shouldn’t have eaten so much. I’m going to be sick.”

“Well maybe if you were eating real food instead of Pop Tarts and Ramen.”

“Hey! I’ll have you know that Ramen is real food. It’s soup and noodles.”

“Yes it is. But I don’t see any bowls in here so I am assuming that you ate it the lazy way, didn’t you?”

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”

“Oh no? So you haven’t been pouring the powder on the dry noodles and eating them like that?”

“No.”

“Clarke. Stop lying to me.”

“I’m not.”

“Yes you are.”

Lexa sets her container and coffee on Clarke’s table as she gets off of the bed. She makes her way over to the easel to take another look at the painting. Clarke eyes her friend warily, getting up to join the brunette.

_“What are you doing Lexie?”_

_“Nothing. I just wanted to look at the painting again.”_ Lexa pretends to look at the canvas, making sure that Clarke’s attention is focused on the painting before making her move. She swipes her finger through a glob of red paint that is inside of one of the cups of Clarke’s palette. She turns to the blonde with a mischievous smile on her face.

_“Hey Clarke?”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“You have some paint on your face.”_

_“Oh my gosh, where?”_ Clarke’s hand flies to her face, blindly swiping at the skin.

_“No. You’re missing it.”_

_“Where is it?”_ Clarke rubs at the skin again.

_“Here. I’ll get it.”_

_“Okay.”_

Clarke moves her hand away from her face. Lexa leans in closely, smudging the red paint across Clarke’s cheeks. The blonde lets out a loud squeal as Lexa rubs the cold liquid into her skin.

_“Oh my god Lexa!!”_

Lexa lets out a loud laugh as Clarke scrambles to get away from her. After another swipe of paint makes it across Clarke’s nose, she manages to move out of Lexa’s reach.

_“That’s it woman!”_

Clarke grabs the tube of black that she has sitting on her dresser. She uncaps the top and squeezes some of it into her hand. She turns towards Lexa with a determined look in her eye. Lexa’s eyes widen in horror. She takes a few steps backwards with her hands raised in surrender. Clarke continues her advance on the brunette; her eyes are alight with playfulness. Lexa continues to back up, grunting softly when her back hits the wall. She tries to move to the right but she is literally backed into the corner of Clarke’s side of the dorm. The blonde is still inching towards her, with black paint caked on her fingers. Clarke is pursuing her like a predator, and even with the three days’ worth of paint on her body, Lexa is willing prey.

Lexa can do little more than squeak as Clarke presses against her body. She has to fight back the urge to moan as the other girl’s chest presses against her own. Clarke’s face is inches from her own and Lexa can smell the sweetness from Clarke’s pancakes on her breath. It would take little effort to close the small amount of distance between them and she so badly wants to. The strong desire to kiss Clarke fills the brunette’s body with a confusing mixture of want and panic. She needs to put some space between them so that she can collect her bearings. She takes a deep breath in, closing her eyes to try and calm her racing heart.

Just as she places her arm on Clarke’s shoulder to put some space between them, the blonde’s hand comes up and presses the cold paint on her closed eyelids. Lexa lets out a gasp as Clarke’s fingers softly spread the paint across her closed eyes.

 _“What are you doing Clarke?”_ Lexa questions as she feels Clarke’s fingers ghost down her cheeks.

 _“Shhh…”_ Clarke’s breath washes over Lexa’s face, causing the brunette to shiver. _“I’m giving you war paint like in your picture.”_

_“Do you have to press me up against the wall in order to do it?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because I don’t trust you to let me do this without a fight. And you work out with Lincoln, so I have no doubt that you are stronger than me.”_

_“I promise that I won’t move if you let me go.”_

_“Hmmmm. No. I’m good. Plus I’m almost done. Why? Am I making you uncomfortable?”_

_“I mean. Not really.”_

_“Okay. Then stand still woman.”_

Lexa lets out a false sight of annoyance. She allows Clarke to continue her work, trying desperately to ignore the buzzing that has overtaken her body. Her mind is fuzzy because of how much of Clarke’s body is pressed up against hers. A soft whimper rolls from her lips before she can stop it and she feels Clarke’s hand freeze on her face.

_“Are you sure that you are alright Lexie?”_

_“I’m fine.”_

_“Okay. Well you can open your eyes now. I’m done.”_

When Lexa opens her eyes, she meets Clarke’s baby blues. The blonde’s face is still extremely close to hers. She knows that she needs to do something when she sees Clarke’s gaze drop to her lips; otherwise they are both about to cross this friendship line again. And there is absolutely no way that Lexa can handle that.

_“How do I look?”_

Clarke takes a few steps back, putting a few more inches of space between her and Lexa’s bodies. Her eyes roam over Lexa’s face, a playful grin gracing her lips.

 _“Honestly?”_ Clarke lets out a soft laugh. _“You look like a raccoon.”_

_“Seriously?”_

_“I mean, you look like a badass raccoon.”_

_“You suck.”_

_“It’s a compliment.”_

_“Oh yeah?”_

_“Yeah.”_

Lexa grabs Clarke’s hand in her own. She brings the hand up to Clarke’s face and smears the remaining black paint on the blonde’s face. Clarke squeals and moves out of the way, pulling her hand out of Lexa’s.

_“That was just rude.”_

_“Well. You called me a raccoon. So sorry, not sorry.”_

_“Oh crap! Lexie. I got some paint on your clothes.”_

Lexa looks down at her clothes. There is indeed some paint that is now staining her white tank top. It must have been wet paint that was on Clarke’s clothes. She looks back up at Clarke with an easy smile.

_“Don’t worry about it.”_

_“But it won’t come out of your clothes.”_

_“It’s fine. Really. It’s just a tank top.”_

_“I will get something for you to borrow.”_

_“You don’t have to. I have a jacket.”_

_“Yeah. My jacket.”_

_“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”_

_“Sure you don’t. Keep the hoodie. It looks better on you anyway.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Yeah. I’m positive.”_

_“Thanks.”_

_“No problem. Speaking of, I should probably take a shower and change.”_

_“Yeah. I feel like you are covered in three days’ worth of paint.”_

_“That is a pretty accurate statement.”_

_“Well go take a shower. I will entertain myself while you are gone.”_

_“Okay. I’ll be really quick. And then you can take one and change into one of my shirts.”_

_“Sounds like a plan.”_

_“Make yourself at home while I am gone.”_

_“Okay.”_

Clarke grabs her shower caddy, towel and phone off of her dresser before leaving the dorm room.

Lexa stands rooted in place for a second. She isn’t really sure what to do with herself while the blonde is gone. She doesn’t feel comfortable with sitting down on Clarke’s bed while she is gone. Even if Clarke told her to make herself at home. Glancing around the room, she cringes at the mess.

So instead of sitting down and waiting for Clarke to return, she searches around the room until she finds an empty  plastic bag.

She moves quickly around Clarke’s workspace, careful to not disturb her materials or the nearly complete masterpiece that the blonde has been working on. She makes a mental note while cleaning to replace the paint that she and Clarke wasted earlier. It doesn’t take her long to clean up the mess. When she is done, she snaps a picture of the now clean room, making sure that the portrait is visible as well. She uploads the photo to her Instagram, adding the caption:  
**-I made @princessgriffers take a break to eat. After a small paint fight, I sent her to take a shower. While she was gone, I decided to clean up her room. On a side note, look at that masterpiece in the corner!- #Iamsurprisedthatshewasntburiedunderthemess #thepaintingmakesitworthit #sheistootalentedtobereal.**

She changes the camera to front facing to take a selfie of Clarke’s war paint. Clarke was right, she does kind of look like a raccoon. Not that she will ever admit that to the blonde. Without a second thought, she decides to post the self on her Instagram too, seeing as how Anya likes to bitch about how infrequently she adds new pictures. She adds the photo with the caption:  
**-This is what I get for bringing @princessgriffers food and coffee.- #raccoonface #shesungrateful #paintfight #tobefairIstartedit.**

After the picture successfully uploads, she clicks on her notifications. She has ten new comments and eighteen likes on the two photos that she uploaded earlier. The picture of Clarke’s dorm room has five comments and eight likes:  
**Nomonwoods, onyakomtrikru, MrLinkon** , and five others like this.  
**raebaereyes** \- She better leave her uncontrolled mess on her side of the room!!!  
**princessgriffers** \- I didn’t let my ‘mess’ get on your side of the room Rae.  
**raebaereyes** \- I don’t believe you Griffin. I will tit punch you if you don’t clean the room.  
**princessgriffers** \- I have more padding up there than you do, just remember that.  
**thebetterblake** \- Ladies, you’re both pretty.

The picture of Clarke painting also has five comments and has ten likes:  
**thebetterblake, raebaereyes, princessgriffers** and seven others like this.  
**princessgriffers** \- @ **HedaLeksa** taking pictures of me when I look terrible. I’m going to kick her ass.  
**thebetterblake** \- Clarke, why is there so much paint on you?  
**raebaereyes** \- Are you really painting or is that body paint? ;)  
**NomonWoods** \- She looks so cute when she is concentrating.  
**onyakomtrikru** \- There is no way that @ **HedaLeksa** would play with body paint. She’s very vanilla!  
**raebaereyes** \- I don’t know babe. George might not agree with you.

The opening of the door pulls her attention away from her phone. She looks up as Clarke walks back into her dorm. The blonde is covered only by her bath towel. Her attention is on her phone.

Lexa feels like a total creep right now, but she can’t tear her eyes away from Clarke. The skin that isn’t covered by the towel is still glistening with moisture from her shower. The tightly wrapped towel accentuates the blonde’s curves. Lexa’s eyes follow a drop of water as trails down the blonde’s neck. She licks at her dry lips as the water slowly moves down Clarke’s collarbone and disappears underneath her towel.

Lexa is still staring at Clarke when the blonde finally looks up from her phone. Clarke eyes the brunette with a mocking glare.

_“It’s not very nice to take pictures of my room and post it on Instagram, Lexa.”_

_“I’m sorry.”_

_“And then you take a picture of me while I’m not looking?”_

_“You just looked so cute when you were concentrating . I couldn’t help it.”_

_“It’s fine. Just a little warning next time?”_

_“Sure. Also. I was looking at the comments and Raven said something about a George?”_

_“Um, yeah.”_

_“Who is George?”_

_“Um. She named the hickey that you gave me George.”_

_“Oh my god. Really?”_

_“Yeah.”_

Lexa laughs incredulously, shaking her head slightly. _“Of course she named the hickey.”_

_“That’s Raven for you.”_

_“Yeah. She’s a lot like Anya. I can see why she is so smitten.”_

_“Raven’s the same way. They are disgustingly sweet.”_

_“Yeah. It’s kind of cute.”_

_“It is.”_

_“Right. So I am going to go take shower I guess. That way you can change.”_

_“Okay. Let me get you a towel.”_

Clarke moves towards the closet so that she can grab a towel. Lexa tries not to stare at Clarke’s backside when she walks away, but she fails miserably. She’s only human after all. While Clarke is searching for a towel, Lexa moves over towards the dresser. She slides her fingers over the cold metal chain of her necklace, blindly searching for the clasp. Undoing it, she carefully places the necklace on Clarke’s dresser.

When she turns back around, Clarke is standing in front of her holding out her shower caddy and a towel. Lexa takes the items with a grateful smile.

_“Thanks.”_

_“No problem. So the showers are down…”_

_“I know where they are Clarke. I used to live in a dorm before Anya and I got our apartment. This hall actually”_

_“Right. Sorry.”_

_“It’s fine. I’ll be back shortly.”_

_“Okay.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke is suffering. She’s actually fairly certain that she is going to die. Being in such a close proximity with Lexa when she isn’t sleep deprived is hard enough. Now that she has been awake for almost four days, her self-control is teetering on edge.

She was so excited that Lexa came to see her. She normally hates being interrupted during her creative phases. Really she prefers to be alone while she creates whatever is stuck inside of her constantly churning mind. The last time that Raven had checked on her while she was in creation mode, she practically ripped the other woman’s head off.

It didn’t bother her when Lexa barged into the dorm. She looked so relieved to see Clarke and it made the blonde’s heart stutter in her chest.

Clarke had to fight back the desire to kiss Lexa senseless when the brunette admitted to being worried about her. She knew that Lexa only meant it in a friendly way, but Clarke couldn’t help but hope that maybe Lexa was beginning to rethink her stance on being just friends with her.

The desire to kiss Lexa only got worse when the brunette revealed that she brought food for Clarke. Not only did Lexa bring her food, she brought Clarke her favorite pancakes.

Lexa bringing up the hickey during their meal had kind of put a damper on Clarke’s mood. It wasn’t the actual hickey that brought her mood down. Rather it was Lexa telling her that she wasn’t ready to try dating again. She was trying so hard to act nothing more than friendly towards the brunette. She was still holding on to a single thread of hope that eventually Lexa would come to her senses and give them a shot. She knew that they would be so good together. She just needed Lexa to give her a chance to prove it.

Her hope was still intact due to two simple words during their talk. Lexa said that she wasn’t ready to be with somebody. ‘Not yet.’ Not yet gave Clarke a small flicker of hope for the possibility in the future. And honestly, even though Lexa told her not to wait, Clarke was totally going to. She knew that there was no way in hell that she was going to be able to just give up on Lexa, regardless of who showed interest in her. She was completely smitten with the brunette. Now she just needed Lexa to make the first move.

She walks around the room while Lexa is gone, picking up the few miscellaneous items that are still strewn on the floor. Since apparently Lexa decided to clean her room for her while she was showering.

After she decides that her side of the room is presentable enough to please her roommate, she realizes that she is still clad in only a towel. Clarke makes her way over to her dresser to pull out a clean outfit.

There are a few capped tubes of paint sitting on top of her dresser. She noticed that Lexa spent a lot of time standing in front of it while she was looking for a towel. Placed in the middle of her dresser is a thin gold chain necklace. Resting on top of the chain is a golden charm.

Clarke cannot stop the gasp from escaping her mouth when she realizes what the charm is. The small golden cog is the same piece that Clarke saw in her dreams. The jewel that is sitting on her dresser is the same jewel that adorned Lexa’s forehead when she was commanding the twelve Grounder clans. She picks up the necklace carefully, turning the cold metal over in her hand. The design is beautiful. Clarke can tell that it is preciously cared for.

She knows that the item must be extremely important to the brunette and she makes a mental note to as Lexa about it at some point.

She sets the item carefully back on her dresser. She then pulls open the top drawer of her dresser, pulling out a pair of lacy red panties and a matching lace bra. She doesn’t really plan on going anywhere else today. She doesn’t have class and Jasper always gives her the week before finals off so that she can study. So she decides to go for a super comfy, casual look. She pulls open another drawer and pulls out a pair of black basketball shorts and an old USMC pt shirt that she stole from Bellamy the last time that he came to visit.

She pulls the panties and the shorts on first, tying the string in a bow to keep the shorts around her hips. The door to her dorm opens and before she has a chance to react, Lexa walks into her room. Clarke’s eyes shoot up from her task at hand to meet Lexa’s gaze, but the brunette’s eyes are locked on Clarke’s very bare chest.

The brunette is wrapped up in Clarke’s towel, holding her discarded clothes in her hand. Her other hand has a white knuckled grip on Clarke’s shower caddy.

 _“Um, Lex..”_ Clarke can feel her face and chest heating up in a blush as she watches Lexa unabashedly check her out.

 _“Sorry.”_ Lexa squeaks, turning her back to the blonde.

Clarke quickly scrambles to put her bra on before pulling her shirt over her head.

As soon as she is decent, she chances a look at the brunette. Lexa is still turned away from her, with the towel resting almost halfway down her back. Lexa has two tattoos that are visible to Clarke. Her wet hair is flipped over her shoulder, exposing her neck. There is an infinity symbol tattooed on the skin. She also has an intricate tattoo running down her spine.

Seeing the tattoos causes Clarke to be hit with the weirdest sense of déjà vu. She’s definitely seen them before. In a dream maybe.

It was definitely a dream. She realizes that only because her mind is now replaying the dream in her head.

She’s lying in a bed with Lexa, trailing her fingers down the brunette’s back. Judging by their state of undress, Clarke would have to guess that they just had sex. Of course her brain would skip that portion of the dream!

 _“This is beautiful.”_ Clarke says as her fingers run up and down the soft skin of Lexa’s back.

_“I got it on my ascension day. A circle for every Natblida that died. When the Commander chose me.”_

_“Seven circles. I thought that you said there were nine officiates at your Conclave.”_

_“There were.”_

_“What happened to number eight?”_

Lexa turns around to face Clarke. _“Can we talk about something else?”_

_“We don’t have to talk at all.”_

Lexa’s smile is infectious as she leans towards Clarke. She presses their lips firmly together, her body moving to hover over the blonde’s.

 _“Clarke?”_ Clarke’s eyes snap open at Lexa’s soft voice. The brunette has stepped forward and is standing awkwardly in front of Clarke. Completely naked except for the towel that she has wrapped around her body.

_“Yeah?”_

_“I’m sorry that I just barged into your room. I should’ve knocked.”_

_“It’s fine Lexa.”_

_“It’s not though. You were in the middle of changing.”_

_“So?”_

_“So I should’ve knocked.”_

_“They’re just boobs Lexa. You have them too.”_

_“Still…”_

_“Seriously. It’s fine. It is my own fault really. I was distracted by your necklace on my dresser.”_

_“Oh. Sorry. I didn’t think that you would mind.”_

_“No, it’s not that. I just. Well, it’s the same as the jewel on your forehead in my painting.”_

_“You noticed that?”_

_“How could I not? I mean it’s exactly the same.”_

_“Yeah. How did you come up with that design anyway?”_

_“It was in my dream.”_

_“That’s so weird. I thought maybe that you caught a glimpse of my necklace at some point and added it.”_

_“No. This is the first time that I have seen the necklace. It’s beautiful.”_

_“Thank you.”_

_“Where’d you get it?”_

_“Um..that’s a long story.”_

_“Oh. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry.”_

_“No. It’s fine. I don’t mind telling you. If I could get dressed first, that would be awesome.”_

_“Oh!! Yes of course. I’m sorry. Let me grab you something to wear. Do you only need a shirt or would you like some shorts?”_

_“Well. There was some paint on my jeans. I managed to get it off but now they’re wet. So if you have any short or leggings. That would be awesome.”_

_“Yeah. Let me grab you something.”_ Clarke turns her back to Lexa to dig through her dresser drawers. She pulls out a plain dark blue tank top and a pair of black basketball shorts. She blindly reaches back so that she can hand Lexa the clothes. _“If you don’t want to walk back through the hall naked, you can just get dressed in here. I promise that I won’t peek.”_

_“Okay.”_

Clarke can hear the towel shuffling behind her as Lexa removes it. It isn’t long before Lexa tells her that she can turn back around.

The sight of Lexa dressed in her clothes makes Clarke suck in a deep breath. Clarke has seen how good Lexa’s legs look when she is dressed in tight jeans or yoga pants. Seeing her legs in all of their naked glory is almost too much for the blonde to bear. Her legs are even better than Clarke could’ve imagined. The taut muscles of her thighs are peeking out from underneath the basketball shorts. Clarke reluctantly tears her eyes away from Lexa’s legs. She definitely doesn’t want the brunette to think that she is a creep.

_“If you want, I can wash your clothes for you.”_

_“That’s okay. I can just take them home.”_

_“Please. Let me wash them. It’s my fault that there is paint on them. Plus maybe I know how to get the paint out.”_

_“Okay fine.”_ Lexa hands her clothes to Clarke. The blonde tosses the clothes on top of her bed before carefully grabbing Lexa’s necklace to hand it to the brunette. Lexa cradles the necklace in her hands like it is the most fragile thing in the world. Lexa’s fingers absentmindedly stroke the cog charm. When her green eyes look back up at Clarke, they are slightly glossy with tears.

_“Can we sit down?”_

_“Yeah, sure.”_

The two women make their way over to Clarke’s bed, sitting down across from each other. Clarke can see the sadness in Lexa’s eyes as her fingers run across the metal necklace. She puts her hand over Lexa’s, causing the brunette’s eyes to snap up and meet hers.

_“You don’t have to talk about it.”_

_“No. I do. I want you to understand.”_

_“Okay. Well, whenever you’re ready, I’m right here.”_

Lexa sucks in a deep breath, pushing the air out through her nose.

_“The necklace was a gift when I graduated from undergrad.”_

_“It really is beautiful.”_

_“Thanks. It was a gift from my girlfriend at the time.”_

_“Well. It’s beautiful. Does the charm mean anything?”_

_“Yeah. Costia said that the cog was supposed to symbolize me getting my life in working order.”_

_“That’s pretty deep.”_

_“Costia had a tendency to do that when it came to gifts. She had the ability to come up with the most meaningful gifts.”_

_“Well the meaning is beautiful.”_

_“Yeah. I had just turned twenty. We’d been together since we were fifteen.”_

_“You finished your undergrad when you were twenty?”_

_“Yes. I graduated high school a year early. And while I was in my senior year, I took a lot of my college prerequisites.”_

_“Okay Miss Smarty Pants.”_

_“Says the girl that was Pre Med.”_

_“Shut up. You’re still smart.”_

_“Anyway. So Costia came down to California when I graduated. She gave me the necklace and told me that it was a symbol. The last piece to get my life into working order.”_ Lexa’s vision blurs as the tears in her eyes start to fall.

 _“You guys were together for a long time.”_ Clarke’s hand is still covering Lexa’s, her thumb rubbing the skin of Lexa’s hand.

_“Almost six years. I thought that I was going to marry her.”_

_“What happened?”_

_“When I started my first year of law school, things got really busy. She was working on her degree in architecture. And she went to school in Connecticut so she was across the country. I knew that we wouldn’t be able to see each other every day. So we made it a point to come visit each other on our breaks.”_ Lexa’s voice cracks as a sob erupts from her chest. _“It worked out for a while but I knew that it was taking its toll on both of us. On one of the breaks that Costia came to see me; all she did was get drunk the entire time. When I asked her about it, she told me that she was just really stressed with her classes and her internship. I was upset but I could understand the stress. So I didn’t hold it against her. The next break we had to cancel because she was swamped with her classes. It was just a mess. The break after that however, was the best time that we had ever had together. We spent a month just hanging on the beach.”_

_“I’m sorry Lexie. You don’t have to go on if you don’t want to.”_

_“No. You deserve to know why I’m broken.”_ Lexa uses her free hand to wipe at her wet eyes. _“After that summer break, I knew that I was ready. I wanted to marry Costia. I picked out a ring that I knew she would love. She wanted to drive herself to the apartment. I think that she knew that I had something special planned. I made her favorite dinner and we had a wonderful time. When I felt like the moment was right, I got down on one knee and I asked her.”_ Another loud sob breaks free.

Clarke wants nothing more than to take Lexa into her arms. The sight of the brunette breaking down in front of her is enough to make tears form in her own eyes. She doesn’t try and fight them back. She knows that she doesn’t stand a chance, so she lets them fall freely down her cheeks. Her thumb presses against the pressure point between Lexa’s thumb and index finger, massaging it to ease the tension.

 _“What did she say?”_ Clarke asks, even though she knows that the answer is not going to be a good one.

_“She told me that we were too young to settle down. That I may love her now, but I still had four years of law school left. That after I graduated we could talk about marriage again. I knew then that she had been cheating on me.”_

_“Oh Lexa, I’m so sorry.”_

_“It’s too late to change it now. I was so upset when she admitted to it, so I went off on her. And she got upset, so she left the apartment because she said that I was overreacting. That was the last time that I saw her.”_

_“She didn’t come back? I’m assuming that she left her stuff in the apartment.”_

_“Well I am sure that she would’ve.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“She went to a bar and got wasted.”_

_“Oh no, Lexa.”_ Clarke can’t watch the brunette cry anymore. She has to do more than just touch her hand. She surges forward and wraps her arms around Lexa’s waist, pulling their bodies tightly together. Lexa immediately relaxes into the embrace, her arms coming to rest around Clarke’s shoulders. Clarke can feel the metal of Lexa’s necklace pressing against her back.

_“I got a call from her mom that night. She got into a car accident and died. She lost control of her rental car and spun over to the other side of the freeway. A semi truck couldn’t stop in time and it hit her. She died instantly.”_

Lexa’s last words are whispered in Clarke’s ear, interrupted by her gasping breaths. Clarke’s hands rub up and down Lexa’s back, trying to calm the other woman’s tears. Lexa’s face is pressed into Clarke’s neck, her warm tears pooling against her skin. Clarke’s tears are probably doing the same to Lexa, but she doesn’t seem to notice.

 _“I want you to have it.”_ Lexa’s tear filled voice is muffled against Clarke’s skin.

 _“What?”_ Clarke pulls away just slightly, enough so that she can hear the brunette. _“What did you say?”_

_“I want you to have the necklace.”_

_“No, Lexa. The necklace was a gift from your girlfriend.”_

_“Yeah, I know. But the meaning behind it. Getting my life in perfect order. I thought that she was implying that it was about that current moment in my life. Now I know.”_

_“Know what?”_

_“She wasn’t talking about the present. This is the moment.”_

_“I don’t know what you mean.”_

_“You’re the last piece.”_

_“Piece of what?”_

_“The last piece that I need to get my life into working order.”_

_“What do you mean by that?”_

_“I feel lighter in a way. I’ve never told anybody this before. So maybe you’re the cog that will help heal my heart.”_

_“That is the most beautiful thing that I’ve ever heard. But I’m confused.”_

_“By what?”_

_“You said that you might never be ready to be with me.”_

_“But maybe I will eventually.”_

_“I hope so.”_

_“I do too.”_

_“I’m going to wait for you.”_

_“No, Clarke. I can’t ask you to do that.”_

_“I want to. If I take this necklace, I’m going to wait until you’re ready.”_

_“I want you to take it.”_

_“Okay.”_

Lexa pulls out of the embrace. Clarke’s releases her hold on Lexa’s waist, bringing her fingers up to wipe away the brunette’s tears. Lexa undoes the clasp on the necklace, bringing the chain around Clarke’s neck. She moves the blonde’s locks out of the way before she clasps the necklace. Her thumbs slide up Clarke’s face, wiping away the tears before resting underneath the blonde’s chin. She gently guides the blonde’s face towards hers, turning her face away. Lexa leans in and presses the softest kiss to Clarke’s cheek. Clarke lets out a shuddering breath, leaning into the kiss. When Lexa pulls away, she is met with the most serene smile that she has ever seen.

_“I’m really sorry, Lexie. I didn’t mean to make you talk about this.”_

_“No. Don’t be sorry Clarke. I’m glad that I told you about it.”_

_“Me too. But now I’m really tired.”_

_“Yeah. Crying has a tendency to do that.”_

_“Let’s take a nap.”_

_“You just want an excuse to get me into your bed.”_

Clarke laughs lightly. _“Please. I’ve already had you in my bed. This is just a repeat performance.”_

_“I don’t even know what to say to that.”_

_“I know. Do you want to be the big spoon or the little spoon?”_

_“What kind of question is that?”_

_“A legitimate one.”_

_“Um….I don’t care.”_

_“So the little spoon then.”_

_“Fine.”_

Clarke moves to lie down on the side of her bed that is against the wall. She pats the other half of her bed with a grin. Lexa shakes her head with a chuckle, moving to lie down with her back facing the blonde. Clarke immediately seeks out Lexa’s waist, wrapping her arm around the brunette’s torso. She pulls Lexa tightly against her body, letting out a sigh of relief when they are pressed together. Clarke falls asleep almost instantly, her soft exhales of breath warming the back of Lexa’s neck. Lexa can feel the lull of sleep grasping at her, trying to pull her in.

 _“Reshop Klark Kom Skaikru. Ai laik yun feva.”_ **(Goodnight Clarke of the Sky People. I am yours forever.)**

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Ten more burpees and then we are done.”_

_“Easier said than done, asshole.”_ Lexa’s growled reply comes out as more of a breathless grunt. She’s sweating like a pig and she is pretty sure that she is about to have a workout induced stroke. She’s definitely in shape, but who decided that doing burpees was an acceptable cool down exercise? _“And you are still making us run after this.”_

 _“Well. I really just want to go and see O at Grounder’s. She’s been kind of reclusive for the past week, studying for her finals.”_ Lincoln replies, effortlessly doing burpees beside Lexa. She is pretty sure that he isn’t human. He hasn’t even broken a sweat and they’ve been at the gym for over an hour now.

_“Yeah. I can totally understand that.”_

_“I hear that Clarke is working today too. Although O said that she has been acting pretty strange. And O is pretty sure that Clarke fell asleep at some point earlier.”_

_“I am honestly not surprised. That girl does not take care of herself when it comes to sleeping.”_

_“She works really hard. She’s an awesome girl.”_

_“Yes she is.”_

_“What’s going on between you two anyway?”_ Lincoln asks as they both make their way over to the water fountain.

 _“Nothing really. We’re friends.”_ Lexa uncaps her water bottle and places it under the tap.

_“Come on Lexa. People don’t make out with their friends. And they most definitely leave hickeys on said friend.”_

_“That was a momentary lapse of judgement.”_ Lexa stops the tap of the fountain and she takes a long swallow of her water. _“I’m not ready to be in a relationship with anybody.”_

Lincoln leans down to take a drink from the fountain. He wipes his chin of the excess water before filling his water bottle. _“Look. I’ve known Clarke since she was twelve. She is like a sister to me. And I can’t sit back and let you play with her emotions. I know that she likes you.”_

_“I know. I promise you that is not what I am doing. I am really trying Lincoln. I just need time. I told her that she doesn’t have to wait for me. But she’s stubborn and she won’t listen to me.”_

Lincoln chuckles as he stops the water from the fountain. _“Yeah she is. She always has been. She’s not ever going to listen to you, you know.”_

_“I kind of figured that.”_

_“Yeah. You’ll get used to it.”_

The two make their way out of the campus gym.

_“You ready?”_

_“Ugh. I guess. Let’s get this over with.”_ Lexa sighs dramatically. Even though she is pretty tired, she is actually looking forward to jogging. Running with Lincoln is usually a quiet affair. He makes small talk sometimes, but they normally run in companionable silence.

It seems that Lincoln doesn’t feel like having a relaxing jog today. He is definitely in the mood for a race. He may be strong, but he is no match for Lexa when it comes to running. She outpaces him easily, barely breaking a sweat by the time they reach the café. Lincoln on the other hand, is panting like he just completed a marathon. Lexa is leaning against the side of the building when he runs up.

_“Nice try dude.”_

_“I could’ve beaten you but I tripped and twisted my ankle.”_

_“Likely story, bud.”_

Lincoln opens the door for Lexa, waving her inside with his hand. She smirks at him before walking into the café. The jingle of the bell doesn’t garner a response from anybody inside, which is not a normal occurrence when Lexa walks into the café. Clark is stationed behind the counter, sedentary at the register. Lincoln branches off on his own in search of his girlfriend.

It isn’t until Lexa reaches the counter that she realizes: Clarke is asleep standing up. She’s leaning slightly to the side, her shoulder pressing into the wall. Her eyes are open, staring blankly ahead of her. Her breathing is even and slow, the faintest of snores coming from her mouth.

 _“She’s been doing that on and off all day.”_ Octavia’s voice startles the brunette, causing her to jump in place. Octavia comes up from behind Lexa carrying a trash bag in her hand.

_“She’s been sleeping standing up?”_

_“Yeah. She’s pretty exhausted.”_

_“When is the last time that she actually slept?”_

_“Um. I think that it was on Thursday when you were over at her dorm. After you left, she ate dinner and finished her painting. She called me around eleven and I came over so we could study together.”_

_“So she has been up since the nap that she took on Thursday?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“How long did you two study for?”_

_“Um we stopped studying at four o’clock this morning so that we could get ready for work.”_

_“So you two have been studying since eleven o’clock Thursday night?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Why? Haven’t you guys ever heard of sleeping?”_

_“Well. Clarke and I have a tendency to get a little bit study crazy when it comes to finals. Also, we work in a café. We just caffeinate ourselves until we have time to sleep.”_

_“That’s not good for your body Octavia.”_

_“I know. Lincoln tells me that all the time. I am literally going to school to be a doctor. I might as well get used to not sleeping very much.”_

Lexa eyes the brunette. Her body is slouching with fatigue but her eyes are wildly alert. She seems fidgety, unable to stand still for an extended amount of time.

_“How much caffeine have you had today?”_

_“I have only had like six shots of espresso.”_

_“Jesus Octavia! It’s not even noon yet.”_

_“I know. I just needed a little push to help me get through this shift. I plan on going home and crashing immediately. Especially since we are all supposed to go out tonight.”_

_“Yeah. Sleep would be a good thing. Drinking alcohol when you are sleep deprived is not a good thing.”_

_“Yes, mom. Speaking of sleep. Would you mind doing me a favor?”_

_“Depends.”_

_“Please take Clarke home so that she can get some sleep. I don’t want to be responsible for her dying on the job. She almost burnt her arm on the espresso machine earlier. She gets off at twelve thirty anyway. I can handle the café until Harper comes in.”_

_“Well I don’t mind taking her home, but Lincoln and I ran here. Am I supposed to carry her?”_

_“No doofus. I’ll just have Lincoln drive you guys to her dorm in his truck. He can just come back and pick me up.”_

_“Okay. Where is he at anyway?”_

_“Oh. I think that he went to go die in the bathroom. He said that you are some sort of machine when it comes to sprinting.”_

_“Hey. In my defense, he wanted to race. I thought that we were just going to have a leisurely jog. But no. Lincoln had to try and race me. It’s not my fault that he doesn’t have the stamina that I do.”_

_“Touché. But no seriously. I sent him to bring the truck around. I imagine that you will have to carry Clarke to the truck. She’s been asleep at the counter for the last twenty minutes so I don’t know if she will be able to stay awake long enough to walk herself.”_

_“Got it. Let me go grab her and get her out of your hair.”_

_“Sounds good. I’ll see you later tonight.”_

_“Yup.”_

Octavia walks away from the brunette, heading towards the trash can that is placed near the front door. Lexa makes her way behind the counter, stepping behind the slumbering blonde. She can’t help but smile when she spies the thin gold chain of her necklace around Clarke’s neck. She places a hand softly on Clarke’s shoulder, careful not to startle her.

_“Hey Clarke?”_

_“Hmmm?”_ Clarke replies without opening her eyes.

_“I’m gonna pick you up now, okay? It’s time to go home and get some sleep.”_

_“I’m fine.”_

_“No honey, you’re not. You keep falling asleep. I’m going to take you home now.”_

_“MMMKay.”_

Lexa grabs Clarke’s arm and drapes it over her shoulders. She kneels down slightly so that she can sweep her arm behind Clarke’s legs. She picks the blonde up effortlessly, hugging her tightly against her chest. Clarke lets out a sigh of contentment, bringing her other arm to wrap around Lexa’s shoulders. She buries her face into the crook of Lexa’s neck, breathing in the other woman’s scent in her slumber.

 _“Hmmm..Lexie. You’re like super strong.”_ The tip of Clarke’s nose brushes against Lexa’s pulse, making it jump erratically. Lexa can’t fight back the shiver as she feels Clarke’s lips ghosting across her neck.

_“Shhh…Just sleep. I’m going to take you to Octavia’s truck now.”_

_“Mmmkay.”_

Lexa makes her way away from the counter, careful not to disturb the blonde’s slumber. She whispers a goodbye to Octavia as she leaves the café. Lincoln has parked at the curb and he is standing outside of the truck, holding the back passenger door open. Lexa moves to put Clarke into the truck, but the blonde’s hold on her neck is too tight. After a few failed attempts to move Clarke’s arms from around her neck, Lexa admits defeat. She climbs into the back of the truck with Clarke still in her arms. She settles into the seat with the blonde on her lap. Clarke murmurs sleepily into her ear as she hugs the blonde tightly into her body. Lincoln offers nothing more than a chuckle and a slight shake of his head. He shuts the door before making his way back to the driver’s side. Lexa tangles her fingers through Clarke’s hair, scratching her nails softly against the blonde’s scalp.

The ride is over before she is ready for it to end. Lincoln unlocks the door and holds it open for them. Lexa settles Clarke into her bed, pulling the covers over her body. She places her lips against Clarke’s forehead, leaving a soft kiss on the skin. She fights the overwhelming urge to crawl into bed with the blonde, reluctantly leaving the dorm before she changes her mind.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke hates being late. Her mother drilled into her at an early age that being punctual could be the difference between life of death. Abby probably only meant that for when Clarke became a doctor.

Ehh, she thinks. Same difference.

She was supposed to meet Niylah for dinner before they met her friends at Arkadia for drinks. They had agreed to meet at six p.m. It is now six thirty, and Clarke is still scrambling to get ready.

She woke up at six with no memory of how she even got to her bed in the first place. The last thing that she remembers was making a drink for somebody at the café. The smell of lavender is still strong in her nostrils, Lexa’s shampoo to be more specific. The lingering smell of the brunette leads her to believe that Lexa is the one that brought her home.

Lexa. Thinking about the brunette sends shivers down her spine. She absentmindedly seeks out the cog charm, rubbing it between her fingers.

Their last conversation replays in her mind. She doesn’t want to get her hopes up, but she feels like she is a few steps closer to breaking through the brunette’s mile high walls. Her desire to call Lexa hers is even more intense than it was before their heart to heart.

Thinking about the pain that Lexa went through makes Clarke’s heart hurt. She can’t imagine suffering such a great loss and going on with life. She can completely understand why Lexa is afraid to put herself out there and date again. The fear of heartbreak is great, and Clarke admires Lexa for even thinking about giving her a chance one day.

First things first, she has to break things off with Niylah. She knows that there is no chance for a relationship with the other woman. Not while she is so hung up on Lexa. A feeling that isn’t likely to fade any time soon. Especially not now that Lexa has given her a promise of sorts.

Luckily for the blonde, Niylah texted her to let Clarke know that she was stuck at work and that she would meet her at the bar when she got done. Clarke let out a sigh of relief to know that she wasn’t running late. She replied back, letting Niylah know that she shouldn’t worry and that she would see her later.

By the time Clarke has finished getting ready, she has already received two text messages from Raven asking her where she is. She decides to leave her hair down, blonde curls cascading down her back. The cog necklace is resting against the fabric of her shirt for the world to see and Clarke can’t bring herself to tuck it away. With one last glance in the mirror, she sets off towards Arkadia.

The bar is packed when she walks in, full of college students desperate to blow off some steam after a stressful week of classes. Her friends are seated towards the back of the bar, laughing amongst themselves when she walks up to the table.

 _“Hey Princess.”_ Raven spots her first, smirking as she takes a drink of her beer. _“You’re late.”_

_“Yeah. I’m sorry. I overslept. Where is your girlfriend?”_

_“She went up to the bar with Lexa to get drinks. They should be back any minute.”_

Clarke nods her head in response as she takes a seat between her best friends. She leans in towards Raven, hugging the brunette quickly.

_“I’ve missed you Rae.”_

_“I know Clarke. Me too.”_

_“When are you coming home?”_

_“I’ll come home tonight.”_

_“Good. Where’s Lincoln?”_

_“He’s at home changing. He should be here soon.”_

_“Where is your lady friend Clarke? I thought that you guys were going out to dinner before you came out here.”_

_“We were. She got stuck at work. She’ll be by when she gets off.”_

_“That sucks.”_

_“Yeah. It happens. I think that I am going to break things off with her anyway.”_

Both Raven and Octavia turn towards Clarke, shock written across their faces.

_“What?”_

_“Why?”_

_“Don’t pretend like you two don’t know.”_

_“About your lady boner for George’s mom?”_

_“Wait. Who is George?”_ Octavia asks, taking a sip of her margarita.

_“George is the name that I gave Clarke’s hickey.”_

_“Oh dude! Nice!”_ Octavia’s arm shoots out in front of Clarke’s face, her fist reaching towards Raven. Raven smiles and bumps Octavia’s fist with her own.

_“You guys are assholes.”_

_“You love us.”_

_“Probably not as much as you love George’s mom.”_

_“Ugh…fuck off Rae.”_

_“No thanks babe. I have a girlfriend for that. Speaking of, here comes yours now.”_

Clarke turns her head to see Lexa and Anya walking back to the table with their drinks in hand. Clarke can’t tear her eyes away from the brunette in question. Lexa’s dark wash jeans hug her hips in all the right ways, making Clarke’s mouth go dry. She has on a green and black plaid short sleeved button up shirt. Clarke can see the ink of Lexa’s bicep tattoo peeking out from the right sleeve.

Lexa smiles when her eyes land on Clarke. Clarke’s eyes follow Lexa as she walks around the table, taking the seat directly across from the blonde.

_“Hey Lexie.”_

_“Hello Clarke.”_

_“How was your day?”_

_“Uneventful. I worked out with Lincoln and kicked his ass in a race.”_

_“Is that all?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“So you didn’t stop by the café and bridal carry me to Octavia’s truck so that you could take me home?”_

_“Hmmm, nope. Must’ve been a dream.”_

_“Weird.”_

_“Yeah. It is. How was your day?”_

_“I don’t remember most of it. I am pretty sure that I was at work at some point. But I woke up in my bed. So you know.”_

_“Maybe you should get regular sleep. So you don’t have crazy dreams like that.”_

_“Probably should.”_

_“Do you want something to drink?”_

_“What are you having?”_

_“My usual.”_

_“Vodka cran. Hold the vodka?”_

_“Yup.”_

_“Nice.”_ Clarke’s phone chimes on the table, notifying her of an incoming text message. She glances down at her phone, unlocking it so that she can read the message.

 **Niylah: (07:17 p.m.)** _Hey. I just left work. I will be at the bar in about 20 minutes._

 **Clarke: (07:17 p.m.)** _Okay. See you in a bit._

Clarke sets her phone back down on the table, glancing back up to meet Lexa’s eyes. Lexa offers her a smile, but Clarke can tell that it is forced. She feels a sharp stab of pain in her chest at the look on the brunette’s face.

_“I’ll be right back.”_

Clarke gets up from the table, making a beeline for the bar. Jasper and Monty are working behind the counter, serving drinks to the patrons. Jasper looks up from his task, smiling as his friend approaches the counter.

_“Well hey, Clarke. How are you this lovely evening?”_

_“I’m alright. It’s busy tonight.”_

_“It’s been like this all day. I think that people are trying to drink themselves to death so that they don’t have to take their finals next week.”_

_“That actually sounds like an awesome idea.”_

_“Right?”_ Jasper chuckles, popping the top off of a bottle of beer before sliding in down the bar top. _“So what can I get you to drink?”_

_“Um. Can I get a jack and coke? And a water?”_

_“Sure thing.”_ Jasper pulls down a bottle of Jack Daniels, filling a lowball glass a third of the way up with the liquor. He scoops some ice into the glass and fills it the rest of the way with Coca Cola. He hands Clarke the drink and a bottle of water.

_“Will you just put it on my tab and I’ll pay at the end of the night?”_

_“Like I’m going to charge you for a drink.”_

_“Liquor isn’t free Jas.”_

_“I know. But my favorite employee who never drinks and works her ass off for me deserves a few drinks every now and then.”_

_“Thanks.”_

_“You got it.”_

_“I’ll see you later.”_

Clarke makes her way back to the table. She takes her seat across from Lexa. Lincoln has since joined the group, sitting next to Octavia. The group makes small talk, mostly about their upcoming finals and how ready they are for summer break. Clarke tunes most of the conversation out, jumping in when she deems necessary.

She stares at Lexa mostly, trying to keep it subtle so that she doesn’t look like a creep. Her eyes trail over the brunette’s features, memorizing her jawline. Her killer cheekbones, and the adorable freckle on her upper lip.

She gets caught once by Lexa and she tries to play it off as a cough. She drops her gaze to the table, and she grips her lowball glass. The glass clanks against something as she lifts it to her face. Looking down, she sees the metal cog swinging against the side of her drink. Her hand freezes on its ascent, her mind immediately rushing memories of her and Lexa’s talk on Thursday. The memories of Lexa crying as she tells Clarke of her dead girlfriend, who died because she was driving drunk, makes Clarke’s stomach churn. Clarke sets the glass back down, unable to even fathom drinking any alcohol tonight.

Her mind is so frazzled at the unwanted memory that she startles when she feels a pair of arms wrap around the back of her neck. If Lexa’s death glare wasn’t enough to give it away, the smell of Niylah’s perfume would’ve. Clarke turns her head to greet the other woman and her lips are immediately captured by Niylah’s. She breaks the kiss as soon as she is able to think. Her heart clenches painfully in her chest when she meets Lexa’s crestfallen gaze.

_“Hey you.”_

_“Hey yourself.”_

_“Sorry that I’m late.”_

_“Oh, that’s okay. I was late too.”_

_“Hey. Come up to the bar with me so that I can get a drink.”_

_“Okay.”_

Niylah grabs Clarke’s hand, hauling her out of her seat, all but dragging the blonde over to the bar. The bar area is packed with people waiting for drinks, Jasper and Monty trying to meet the demands of the patrons. Clarke tugs on the brunette’s hand, leading her towards the stockroom. She pulls Niylah behind the door, locking it behind them. Niylah’s eyes widen in surprise and her lips curve into a knowing smile.

_“Well, if you wanted to get me alone, you could’ve just asked.”_

Niylah surges forward, pressing her lips firmly against Clarke’s. The brunette’s body pushes into Clarke’s, forcing her back into the hard wood of the door.

Clarke’s brain takes a few seconds to get over the shock of being kissed for a second time. She pulls away from the kiss with a gasp, her hands pushing against the brunette’s shoulders.

_“Wait.”_

_“Hmmm?”_ Niylah pulls away from Clarke, confusion written across her face.

_“Look. I didn’t bring you back here to hook up. I wanted to talk.”_

_“Oh man. Those are not the words that a girl wants to hear. Should I sit down?”_

_“That’s totally up to you.”_

Niylah sits on top of one of the untapped kegs that is back there. She runs her hands over her face before tangling her fingers in her hair.

_“So I’m not really sure where to start.”_

_“Probably the beginning would be best.”_

_“Yeah. Okay.”_ Clarke begins to pace in front of the brunette, her left hand coming up to clutch at the cog charm resting against her chest. _“I don’t really know how to tell this story without sounding like an asshole.”_

_“Just get it over with Clarke.”_

_“Okay.”_ Clarke nods her head, inhaling a deep breath through her nose. _“So not too long before we met, I met Lexa. She came into the café while I was working to order a drink. I was intrigued by her from the moment I met her. She came in every morning that I was working for a while. And eventually we hung out. I don’t really know how to explain it. I haven’t really dated anybody since my last boyfriend turned me into a homewrecker. So meeting Lexa was like a breath of fresh air. I actually wanted to put myself out there. So I tried to get her kind of go out with me. I mean I didn’t explicitly ask her out but I implied that I wanted her to go out with me. So told me that she couldn’t. I assumed that it was because she wasn’t attracted to me. So I agreed to be friends with her.”_

_“So far I don’t see how you are an asshole.”_

_“I’ve got more. So our friendship has pretty much teetered the line of being inappropriate from the beginning. It started off with flirty looks. She would play really hot and cold with me. So it got really frustrating. And then I met you. And I couldn’t get Lexa out of my head. You were putting so much effort into flirting with me and you weren’t immediately taking it back or acting like nothing had happened. Plus you’re really pretty. So you flirted with me and you asked me out. And I was genuinely interested in getting to know you. I can’t lie and say that it wasn’t for selfish reasons at first. I was really trying to get over my crush on Lexa because she told me that we would never be anything but friends. So I thought that going out with you would help.”_

_“Wow.”_

_“I know. It’s really fucked up and I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to be an insensitive asshole. I promise that I am not usually like this. Lexa just untethers me. I can’t get over her. And I’ve almost gotten her to a point where I think that she might be ready to give me a chance. And I can’t pass it up. I can’t apologize enough because you are an amazing woman. But I can’t keep stringing you along. Iiiii…just…I’m sorry.”_

_“Clarke..”_

Clarke looks up to meet Niylah’s gaze. The brunette is smiling, albeit a little sadly.

_“I forgive you.”_

_“You do?”_

_“Yeah. I mean. I want to be mad. But I can’t be.”_

_“Yes, you can be. You have every right to be fucking pissed at me.”_

_“I know that I do. But I’m not.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because I don’t blame you. You can’t help who you fall in love with.”_

_“I’m not in love with Lexa.”_

_“Oh please, Clarke. I’ve seen you guys a few times together and the way that you look at each other is disgustingly cute. And I know that you think that I am naïve, but I know that the mark on your neck is a hickey. I’m assuming that it is one that Lexa gave to you?”_

_“Ummm..”_

_“Clarke.”_

_“Alright. Yes. But the thing about Raven throwing an apple at my face and me getting a black eye actually happened.”_

_“I do not doubt that.”_

_“It did not feel good. I know that it probably isn’t worth anything, but I am so sorry Niylah. I didn’t mean to screw with your feelings.”_

_“Clarke. I really do forgive you. It sucks because I really liked you. But it’s not totally your fault. The heart wants what the heart wants.”_

_“Yeah. Now I just have to convince Lexa that I’m worth it.”_

_“She’ll come around, Clarke.”_

_“You think so?”_

_“She’d be an idiot not to.”_

_“Thanks. We should probably go back out there.”_

_“You’re probably right.”_

The two women leave the stockroom, making their way back out to the main room of the bar. Niylah makes a beeline for the bar to get a drink. She’s almost to the empty table when she feels an arm loop through hers. She is whirled around to face Anya. The blonde is looking at her like she has homicidal intent.

_“Let’s go dance.”_

_“Um…I don’t want to die.”_

_“Then you’d better get your ass on the dance floor with me.”_

As soon as they reach the dance floor, Anya whips Clarke around, pressing the blonde’s back against her front. She keeps her hands on Clarke’s hips to guide her into the rhythm of the song. She leans her head against Clarke’s, her lips near the blonde’s ear.

_“What the hell is going on with you and Lexa?”_

_“Nothing.”_

_“You can’t bullshit a bullshitter, Clarke.”_

_“What exactly do you want me to say, Anya?”_

_“Well. I guess that you can start by answering a few of my questions.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Cool. So first question is: why are you wearing Lexa’s necklace?”_

_“Um..because she gave it to me. After she told me about Costia.”_

_“So she told you about Costia?”_

_“Yeah. Look long story short, I had a dream about Lexa. In the dream she was like this badass commander of all these different clans on earth. She wore a symbol on her forehead. When I woke up from the dream, I had to paint her. She came to my room after I had been lock away working on the portrait for three days. She brought me food. So she saw the painting. The symbol that I painted on her forehead is the same symbol on the necklace. She told me about Costia and told me that she wanted me to keep the necklace.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Well she said the when Costia gave her the necklace it was to symbolize her getting her life in working order. The reason that she gave it to me is because she said that I was the missing piece in her life. That she wanted to try and heal so that she could be with me.”_

_“Oh my god that is so sweet.”_

_“Yeah. I thought so too. I told her that I was going to wait until she was ready.”_

Clarke turns in Anya’s arms, wrapping her own around the blonde’s shoulders. They sway slowly to the beat of the song.

_“So if you are waiting for my best friend to be with you, what’s up with the other brunette?”_

_“Look. I didn’t know that she was going to kiss me. I took her into the backroom so that I could break things off with her without any interruptions. I really like Lexa and I want to be with her so badly. But I had to tell Niylah that I couldn’t see her anymore.”_

_“Shit.”_

_“What?”_

_“Well. Lexa got kind of crazy jealous when she kissed you. And then you guys left and were gone for a good while. Lexa was going on and on about how you and Naomi were hooking up. So she kind of lost her mind.”_

_“Oh no. What did she do?”_

_“Well first she drank your jack and coke. Then she went to the bar and downed seven shots in about twenty minutes.”_

_“Oh my god. Is she okay?”_

_“Well, she’s pretty fucking hammered right now. Raven took her out on the dance floor so that she could dance her feelings out for a bit. But I think that we will probably have to get her home soon.”_

_“I can take her home. So you guys don’t have to leave.”_

_“No. You don’t have to do that.”_

_“Well. It’s my fault that she is wasted. I don’t mind taking care of her. I haven’t had anything to drink tonight.”_

_“Not even some of your jack and coke?”_

_“No. I had a flashback to Lexa and I’s talk about Costia before I could take a drink and it made me feel sick so I decided that I didn’t want to drink.”_

_“Well I can understand that.”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Okay. Let’s go get your girl.”_

_“She’s not my girl.”_

_“Yet. I have to warn you Clarke. She gets very touchy feely when she’s drunk.”_

_“Well. I am sure that I will be fine.”_

_“Okay. Well I can let you take my car if you want.”_

_“If you want.”_

_“Yeah. I mean. Raven and I can catch a cab home, or have Octavia and Lincoln drop us off.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Well if you want to go pull the car up to the front of the car, I will wrangle Lincoln into carrying her out of the bar.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Cool.”_ Anya pulls her keys out of her jean pocket and hands them to Clarke. _“My car is a dark blue Honda Civic. If you can’t find it in the parking lot, just hit the lock button on the fob.”_

_“Sounds good.”_

Clarke pulls out of Anya’s arms, heading out the backdoor of the bar.

She doesn’t have much trouble finding Anya’s car. And before long she is pulling into the drop off zone of the bar. Anya is standing at the curb with Lincoln holding a drunken Lexa in his arms. The brunette is flailing drunkenly as Lincoln holds her, trying to squirm out of his arms. Anya opens the passenger door so that Lincoln can set Lexa inside of the car. He buckles her seatbelt, dodging her playful smacks. Anya pokes her head inside of the car.

_“Right. Lexa, you need to behave. Clarke is going to take you home. I’ll see you later.”_

_“Nnnnnoooooo…I dun wana leaf. Klark is busy with Nikki.”_

_“It’s Niylah and no she’s not. She is right next to you in the car.”_

_“I like her.”_

_“I know that you do babe.”_

_“Why am I so broken?”_

_“It’s not your fault. You’re trying to heal.”_ Anya eyes Clarke, tipping her head towards the steering wheel. Clarke takes the hint and starts the car. “ _I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”_

_“Okay.”_

Anya closes the door, leaving Lexa and Clarke alone in the car. Clarke pulls out of her spot, heading in the direction of her dorm room. Lexa is silent the whole way home, leading Clarke to believe that she is asleep, or still angry.

By the time Clarke pulls into the parking lot outside of her dorm, Lexa is passed out. Clarke tries to rouse the drunken girl, but she is unsuccessful. So she gets out of the car and walks over to the passenger side, opening it. She slides her hands underneath Lexa’s thighs, pulling the brunette into her arms.

Carrying the brunette isn’t a feat for Clarke. Lexa is lighter than she looks; her petite body fits easily in Clarke’s arms.

Lexa hasn’t moved at all in the time that it has taken Clarke to reach her dorm room. She fumbles with her keys for a minute before she is able to manipulate the key the way that she needs it. She unlocks the front door, carrying Lexa into her room. She locks the door behind her, settling the brunette into her bed. She unbuttons Lexa’s pants, pulling them off of the other girl. She hopes that Lexa doesn’t get mad about being Clarke undressing her while she was sleeping, but she’s pretty sure that she won’t be.

Lexa rouses from her slumber when Clarke lies down next to her. She smiles goofily at the blonde, hiccupping from her drunkenness.

 _“Hey Clarke?”_ The brunette slurs.

_“Hmm?”_

_“I don’t like it when other people kiss you.”_

_“I’m sorry Lexa.”_

_“I want to be the only person that you kiss.”_

_“We will get there one day. I broke things off with Niylah this evening.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because I only want you, you big idiot.”_

Lexa leans in slightly, her liquor infused breath washing over Clarke’s face and neck.

_“That’s nice. I’m not ready yet.”_

_“No? Well someday you will be. And I will wait until that day comes.”_

Lexa pulls her body into Clarke’s, holding the blonde in a tight embrace.

Lexa’s eyes drop down to stare at Clarke’s lips. And she can’t stop herself from leaning in to kiss the brunette. She stops inching in when she hears a soft snore escape Lexa’s mouth. The very same mouth that she was half a second away from kissing. Only to have Lexa pass out while she’s trying to play Casanova.

Her last thought before she falls asleep is how badly she wants to kiss Lexa.

This cinnamon roll of a woman is going to be the death of her.

And honestly, she can’t find it in herself to care.

She’s completely screwed when it comes the brunette next to her.

And she wouldn’t change anything at all.

Fucking Lexa Woods.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**TBC**

 


	10. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -Clarke and Lexa spend some time together.
> 
> -Raven and Anya get serious. 
> 
> -A super awesome surprise for our favorite girls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hey lovelies. Here is another update for you beautiful people. I am super sorry that this update has taken me so long. I have been trying to adjust to the working world again and it kicked my ass for a bit. But now I am back. I can’t promise that I will be able to update every week like I was, but I will try and not take so long next time.
> 
> A big thank you to my wonderful beta Randomme103. She puts up with a lot of crap from me. And she still sticks around to proofread each chapter and makes sure that I don’t miss important things. Plus, she is the reason why you thirsty bitches get some smut in this chapter.
> 
> I hope that this chapter is an enjoyable one. And Randomme103 and I are very excited for the next chapter. We are pretty positive that you guys are going to love it.
> 
> Feel free to leave a comment and let me know what you thought, or come bug me on tumblr @jeffrinamichelle. Thanks for reading awesome nerds! I cherish each and every comment and kudo that you guys leave.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Barista’s Choice**

**~*~*~*~*~***

 

**Chapter 9**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa hates hangovers. With a passion. Even before Costia got into her accident, she wasn’t much of a drinker. The sluggish feeling the morning after a night of drinking was not a feeling that Lexa particularly enjoyed, so she tried to avoid alcohol at all costs.

Seeing Niylah kiss Clarke had completely unraveled the Lexa. She didn’t even think twice before she slammed back the jack and coke that Clarke had abandoned on the table when Niylah took Clarke by the hand and pulled her away from the table. The amount of jealousy coursing through her body was almost ridiculous.

She has no claim on Clarke. Sure, she opened up a little bit and told Clarke why she was so afraid to be in a relationship again. She gave her the necklace that Costia gave her and told her that one day she will be ready to try. Clarke said that she was going to wait for Lexa to be ready, but she can’t really blame Clarke for not wanting to.

Or at least that is what Lexa thought. Clarke’s revelation about breaking things off with Niylah floored Lexa, even in her drunken state. She couldn’t even bring herself to feel bad for Niylah because she was way too excited about Clarke saying that she only wanted her.

So waking up in Clarke’s bed was not an unwelcome surprise. She even took an extra minute to bury her face into Clarke’s pillows, basking in the scent of her friend. It takes her alcohol fuzzy mind some time before she realizes that Clarke is not in bed with her. She was pretty hammered last night, but she is almost positive that Clarke went to sleep with her.

Lifting her sleep heavy head off of the pillow, Lexa curiously glances around the empty dorm room. Raven’s bed is still neatly made up, telling Lexa that Clarke definitely spent the night in bed with her.

She doesn’t have a chance to panic before the door is being opened quietly. Clarke steps into the room, clad in a very short pair of bicycle shorts and a tight blue tank top. She is holding two paper cups and a plate. She smiles brightly at Lexa when she meets her friend’s worried gaze. Clarke kicks the door closed as she walks into the dorm.

 _“Hey sleepyhead.”_ Clarke’s sleep husked voice sends a shiver down Lexa’s spine.

_“Hey.”_

_“How’d you sleep?”_ Clarke sits down at the end of her bed. She holds a paper cup out to Lexa in offering. _“It’s instant coffee, so it’s going to taste like shit probably. But it’s the only thing that I had.  I also make some eggos. I know its crap, but college student in a dorm here.”_

 _“Clarke, its fine. I am a college student too, remember?”_ Lexa moves to sit up in Clarke’s bed. She takes a sip of the coffee, grimacing at the slightly bitter taste. _“I don’t know how you can stand this crap when you work in a café.”_

_“It gets the job done it you chug it. The faster you drink it, the less you have to taste it.”_

_“Well. I need the caffeine so I’m not going to be picky.”_

_“I made you some lukewarm eggo waffles too.”_

_“I love eggos. I pretty much lived off of these things my freshman year here.”_ Lexa grabs a waffle off of the plate. She takes a huge bite of the ‘waffle,’ chewing the pastry with a sigh. The spongy goodness of the frozen waffle is just what her hungover mind needed. She swallows the waffle before taking another drink of the ‘coffee.’

_“Hey Clarke.”_

_“Hmmm?”_ Clarke asks between bites of her waffle.

_“Where are my pants?”_

Clarke sputters as a piece of waffle gets stuck in her throat. She brings her free hand up so that she can beat on her chest, a rough cough breaking free.

 _“What?”_ Clarke croaks out, coughing again to clear her throat.

_“Well. I am not wearing pants. I am curious as to why.”_

_“Um. Well. Last night you were pretty hammered. I put you to bed. But I didn’t think that you would be comfortable sleeping in jeans. So I took your pants off.”_ Clarke takes a bite of her waffle to combat any more word vomit from escaping her traitor mouth. She can feel a blush spread across her cheeks.

_“Oh. Well, thanks for making sure I was comfortable.”_

_“What are friends for?”_

_“Apparently taking off your pants when you’re drunk.”_

_“Stop. I just didn’t think that you would be comfortable sleeping in your jeans.”_

_“I’m totally kidding. I would’ve woken up miserable if I slept in jeans. Thank you for everything last night.”_

_“You’re welcome.”_ Clarke finishes the last of her crappy instant coffee, managing to swallow it with only a small grimace. _“How much of last night do you remember?”_

_“I remember everything from last night.”_

_“Oh, okay. That’s good.”_

_“Why? Is something bothering you?”_

_“No. I mean, not really. I just…”_ Clarke drops her gaze into her lap, her fingers nervously fumbling together.

 _“What? Clarke, look at me.”_ Lexa sets her coffee cup on the bedside table. She cradles Clarke’s chin in her free hand and gently tips her head up so that their eye lock. _“What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours?”_

_“Nothing really. I just said a lot of things last night and I don’t want to freak you out.”_

_“Clarke. You didn’t.”_

_“I didn’t?”_

_“No. Why would you think that?”_

_“Because I told you that I pretty much only want to be with you. And I know that you aren’t ready and you might never be. But I can’t help myself around you.”_

_“Clarke.”_ Lexa’s slides her hand from Clarke’s chin to rest against her cheek. Clarke nuzzles into Lexa’s touch with a sigh. _“I am not freaking out. At all. As soon as I can make my stupid head catches up with what my heart wants, you will be the first person that I tell.”_

_“God, I’d better be. I will kick your ass if I have to.”_

_“I’d like to see you try.”_

_“Don’t test me Lexie. You may be all badass now that you are working out with Lincoln, but I could still take you.”_

_“You think so?”_

_“Oh. I know so.”_

_“Hmmm…let’s see about that.”_

Lexa lunges forward, tackling Clarke’s body onto the top of the bed. Clarke lets out a squeal as her shoulders hit the soft mattress. Lexa’s thighs straddle Clarke’s hips, pinning her to the bed.

_“Lex. What the hell?”_

_“What? I thought that you could take me, Clarke.”_

_“Hmmm?”_ Clarke’s eyes flit down to Lexa’s lips. Lexa does not miss the way Clarke’s eyes darken, or the way that her nostrils flare as she openly stares at Lexa’s mouth. She wants so badly to close the miniscule amount of distance between them to capture Clarke’s lips between hers once again. To be able to feel the Clarke’s soft mouth moving against her own. She wants nothing more than to be able to taste the sweetness of Clarke’s tongue as it tangles against hers. Lexa leans in slightly, stopping only when Clarke sucks in a deep breath.

_“God, I really want to kiss you right now.”_

Clarke turns her head away from Lexa with a groan. _“That’s not fair, Lex. Please don’t.”_

 _“What?”_ Lexa’s brow furrows in confusion.

Clarke brings her hand up to Lexa’s face, her fingertips stroking her cheek softly. _“I want nothing more than to feel your lips pressed against mine. But, please don’t mess with my head, I can’t take it. I am so ready to just say fuck it and pour everything that I have into you. But you’re not ready, and I told you that I would wait until you are.”_

_“I know that. I just don’t know how much longer I want to wait.”_

_“It takes as long as it takes. You can’t heal overnight.”_

_“Ugh…”_

_“I know it sucks, hon. I just want you to know that I won’t give up on you. We will get there, together.”_ Clarke pushes her body up into a sitting position. She uses her hand on Lexa’s face to guide the brunette towards her. She presses her mouth to Lexa’s cheek, her lips lingering on Lexa’s face. Lexa inhales deeply through her nose as Clarke’s warm lips scorch her skin.

 _“CLARKE!!!!! Oh my god, my eyes!”_ Lexa’s eyes widen as she scrambles to get off of Clarke. She lets out a yelp as she almost tumbles off of the small bed, Clarke’s arm sliding around her waist to keep her from falling onto the floor.

Octavia is standing in the doorway of Clarke’s dorm with a hand over her eyes. _“Is it safe for me to look or am I going to get an eyeful of vagina?”_

_“Shut up O. Nobody is naked in here.”_

_“Hmmm. Shame.”_ Octavia pulls her hand away from her eyes as she walks completely into the room. _“Good morning ladies. Or I guess that I should say afternoon because it is like twelve thirty.”_

_“Ugh. What do you want, O?”_

_“Well. If you would’ve answered your phone, I wouldn’t have had to barge in on your lady lovin’ thing that you two have going on. But since you didn’t, I had to come over here instead of spending time with Lincoln.”_

_“What’s your point?”_

_“My point is this.”_ Octavia holds up her phone screen. Clarke lets out a loud squeal that makes Lexa cringe as she jumps off of the bed.

 _“BELL!!!!”_ Clarke grabs Octavia’s phone, pulling the device close to her face.

_“Hey Princess.”_

_“Oh my God! How are you?”_

_“I’m good. How are you?”_

_“I’m awesome. Especially now. I haven’t talked to you in forever.”_

_“It’s a little bit hard to make phone calls when you’re out keeping the country safe.”_

_“Shut up Bell. We all know that you’re a hero.”_

_“Yeah, yeah, Princess.”_

_“So it’s not that I’m not super happy to hear from you Bell, but you never facetime O unless you have big news.”_

_“Okay, you got me Clarke. I called O because I wanted to let you guys know that I am home on leave.”_

_“Oh my god! That’s awesome! Are you going to come visit me on campus again?”_

_“I wish that I could. But I can’t.”_

Clarke juts her bottom lip out in a pout. _“Awww, why not Bells? You always come see me when you are on leave.”_

_“Well. That is the other part of my news for you guys. I am coming up there next week, but it’s only so that I can pick up O and Lincoln and bring them home for the summer.”_

_“Okay? That’s what you normally do, but you usually stay here for a week so that we can hang out.”_

_“I know that Clarke. But I don’t have time. I was actually going to ask if you would come home with us.”_

_“Oh, no Bell. I can’t go home for the summer.”_

_“Please Clarke.”_

_“I can’t afford it. I have to work so that I can save up for next semester.”_

_“Okay. Don’t bullshit me Princess. I know that you can afford to take some time off. Plus you know that mom and dad will help you if you ask.”_

_“I can’t do that Bell. You know that.”_

_“Okay, I get that. I totally do. But I really need you to come home. Just for a week. That’s all that I ask.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because I’m getting married. And I need both of my sisters to be there.”_

_“What?? You’re getting married?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Oh my gosh Bell. I didn’t even know that you were dating anybody.”_

_“Yeah. It just kind of happened. This girl Echo that is in my unit. She’s amazing C. You’ll love her.”_

_“Well I’m sure that I will.”_

_“Please tell me that you’ll come home.”_

_“I don’t know Bell. I don’t know if I can be around Abby.”_

_“Clarke. You haven’t seen her in three years. Can you just think about it at least?”_

_“I’ll think about it. I can’t promise anything.”_

_“That’s all that I can ask of you.”_

_“I will think about it.”_

_“Awesome. I miss you Princess.”_

_“I miss you too Bells.”_

_“Now give me back to that crazy sister of mine. I’ll see you next week.”_

_“Okay.”_ Clarke hands the phone back to Octavia. She looks between Clarke and Lexa with a smirk, mouthing ‘We’ll _talk later’_ before turning her attention back to her phone. She leaves Clarke’s dorm without another word.

_“So…”_

Clarke turns to face Lexa, who is still sprawled out on her bed. Lexa’s face is questioning, her deep green eyes alight with mirth.

_“So, what?”_

_“So you don’t want to go to your friend’s wedding because you don’t want to face your mom?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“That doesn’t seem like a very good reason to miss Octavia’s brother’s wedding.”_

_“Would you really want to go see your mom if she completely cut you off financially? Right at the beginning of your college career. So that you have to work two jobs just to survive.”_

_“Hey.”_ Lexa gets off of the bed, quickly making her way over to her friend. Lexa’s hands cup Clarke’s cheeks, her fingers wiping away tears that Clarke didn’t even know were falling. _“I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to upset you. It’s just not every day that one of your friends gets married. I don’t want you to regret not going.”_

_“I know. I just don’t know if I can face my mom.”_

_“Why not?”_ Lexa’s hands fall from Clarke’s face, coming to rest on her hips. She grips the other girl’s waist and pulls her into a tight embrace. Clarke lets out a sigh of relief as she wraps her arms around Lexa’s shoulders. Clarke drops her face into the crook of Lexa’s neck, a stuttering breath warming her skin. _“Why would you not want to go to this wedding and show her just how much being cut off has affected you? Show her that you didn’t need her money to get by. That you’ve done just fine on your own.”_

 _“I don’t know Lexie.”_ Clarke’s muffled reply into Lexa’s neck causes her to shiver.

_“You should show off. Let Abby see what she is missing without you in her life.”_

_“You’re right.”_

_“I know that I am. And if you don’t want to go stag, I’ll go with you.”_

_“Oh god. I couldn’t ask you to do that.”_

_“I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t want to go with you.”_

_“I would love to take you to Bellamy’s wedding as my date.”_

_“Awesome. I only have two conditions.”_

_“Name them.”_

_“First condition is, I want to take a road trip before we head to San Diego. I haven’t had the chance to travel through California since I’ve been out here and I have always wanted to.”_

_“Okay. I can deal with that. What’s you second condition?”_

_“I won’t wear a dress to the wedding.”_

_“Weird but okay. What will you wear?”_

_“I told you that I always wanted to have a suit. So I think that I’ll do that.”_

Clarke’s face presses harder into Lexa’s neck to stifle the groan that she can’t manage to bite back. The thought of Lexa being dressed in a fitted suit causes arousal to pool in her core. Clarke licks her suddenly dry lips, trying to push back the completely inappropriate thoughts that are currently flooding her mind.

 _“Yeah. That sounds good.”_ Clarke’s voice is huskier than normal, laden with her sudden burst of arousal. Lexa doesn’t miss the raspy tone of Clarke’s voice, her own arousal becoming extremely evident in that moment.

 _“Okay.”_ Lexa reluctantly pulls away from Clarke’s embrace as she tries to regain her composure. The tiny thread of fear that she is still harboring is the only thing that stops her from throwing caution to the wind when it comes to Clarke. _“So. I am in desperate need of a run right now. Would you care to join me?”_

_“Ugh. I guess so.”_

_“Awesome. Do you maybe have a pair of shorts that I can borrow?”_

Clarke glances down at Lexa’s very naked legs. She curses inwardly, a fresh wave of arousal washing over her at the sight of Lexa’s very defined muscles.

_“Are you sure that you don’t want to go out running like that?”_

Lexa laughs softly at Clarke’s words. _“You’d like that wouldn’t you?”_

Clarke raises her eyebrow, letting out a chuckle, she replies, _“I can’t say that I would be upset to see you running in your underwear. But, I don’t really want to bail you out of jail when you get arrested for indecent exposure, so I guess you can borrow some shorts.”_

_“Sweet. I need to sweat out this hangover.”_

_“Oh…”_ Clarke’s nose scrunches in disgust. _“This is going to suck, isn’t it?”_

_“I promise that I’ll take it easy on you.”_

_“Why don’t I believe you?”_

_“Come on, don’t be whiney. You’ll be fine.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Easy my ass.”_ Clarke mutters under her breath. Lexa has been outpacing her for the last half mile of their run. Even in her hungover state, Lexa is an absolute machine when it comes to her stamina. Thinking of Lexa’s stamina is not helping Clarke’s current state of mind.

Clarke has already been suffering from an almost constant state of arousal since she met Lexa. She has been unable to sate this feeling, and it has not been for a lack of trying.

Running a few steps behind Lexa is complete torture for Clarke. Watching the way that Lexa’s muscles constrict with the strain of her run is captivating to Clarke. It is also enough to make her state of arousal soar even higher, becoming almost painful in nature.

Clarke isn’t used to having a dry spell. She isn’t one to sleep around really, opting for some alone time if the need should arise. But ever since she met Lexa, she has been unable to quell the desire coursing through her body.

After knowing Lexa for almost a month, Clarke has been unsuccessful in her attempts to satisfy her almost wanton craving for her ‘friend.’ She is feeling incredibly frustrated while running behind Lexa. Openly ogling Lexa in her tight, borrowed running shorts is not helping matters either.

By the time they reach Clarke’s favorite park, she is completely overwhelmed with her feelings. The most prominent feeling that is taking over her being right now is anger. She is about two seconds away from losing her mind when Lexa finally stops to take a break. She comes to a stop beside the fountain, hunching her body over to catch her breath. Clarke takes a minute to unabashedly stare at Lexa, drinking in her friend’s sweat glistening skin. This only serves to frustrate Clarke even further, causing Clarke to let out a feral growl as she sits down on the cold concrete of the fountain’s base.

Lexa straightens her body out, glancing at Clarke with a small smirk on her face.

 _“Everything okay?”_ She questions as she lifts her heel to her backside, stretching the slightly aching muscles of her legs. She keeps her leg in place for a few seconds before switching to the other one.

_“Fine.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Yes. I’m fine.”_

_“Clarke…”_

_“Just leave it, Lexa.”_

_“What’s wrong?”_

_“Seriously, I’m fine.”_ In Clarke’s haste to get up, she manages to trip over her own two feet, causing her to fall backwards into the fountain. A loud squeal is the only thing that she manages to squeak out as she lands in the extremely cold water. Lexa runs forward, trying to grab Clarke as she falls. She manages to grasp Clarke’s arm, stopping her from slamming her head into the concrete of the fountain, but Clarke still falls into the water.

_“Oh my fucking god!!! COLD!!!”_

Lexa slides her grip to Clarke’s elbow, using her newly found strength to hoist her friend out of the cold water. She steadies Clarke before immediately relinquishing her hold on Clarke. Clarke’s eyes are screwed shut as she tries to fight off the shivers wracking her body.

_“Clarke. Are you okay?”_

_“No, I’m not okay. I’m freezing.”_

_“Well. Serves you right for snapping at me.”_

_“What?”_ Clarke’s eyes widen in shock as she looks at Lexa. Lexa has her arms crossed over her chest, a playful smirk gracing her lips. _“I didn’t snap at you.”_

_“Um, yeah you did. You practically bit my head off.”_

_“Well. It’s not my fault that you are….”_ Clarke feels embarrassment flood her cheeks as her previous thoughts replay in her mind.

_“It’s not your fault that???”_

_“Nothing.”_ Clarke mumbles, dropping her head into her hands. Another violent shiver rocks Clarke’s body. _“You’re just really fucking distracting.”_

 _“Thank you?”_ Lexa’s eyes look Clarke up and down; mesmerized by the way the wet fabric is clinging to her body. She has to bite back a groan as her gaze roams over the subtle curves of Clarke’s hips, green eyes lingering on the soaked fabric straining around her chest.

_“Hey. Eyes up here, Woods.”_

Lexa’s eyes snap up to meet Clarke’s. Her cheeks heat up in embarrassment at being caught staring at her friend’s chest. She expects to see anger reflected in Clarke’s blue eyes, but she only looks amused.

_“Sorry.”_

_“Don’t worry about it. We’re even now.”_

A broken cry breaks the two girls out of their reverie. The sound seems to be coming from inside of the fountain. Lexa moves away from Clarke to seek out the source of the sound. On the opposite side of the fountain is what looks to be a puppy. A very small, wet husky puppy. It’s bright blue eyes look up at Lexa with so much sadness that it makes Lexa’s eyes well up with tears. It lets out a pathetic whine that absolutely breaks her heart. She immediately pulls the tiny ball of wet fur out of the fountain, clutching the shivering pup against her chest. Clarke’s curiosity gets the better of her and she makes her way over to the other side of the fountain. She comes to a complete stop when she takes in the sight before her. Lexa is carefully cradling a tiny puppy against her chest, almost like she is holding a baby. The way that Lexa has the small pup resting against her body makes Clarke’s heart double in speed. She is rocking back and forth slightly as she uses her shirt to dry off the dog.

_“Whatcha got there, Lexie?”_

Lexa looks up from her task to meet Clarke’s questioning gaze. The tiny, shivering pup looks up at the sound of Clarke’s voice. Its little face is mostly white, with a mask of black covering its bright blue eyes. The mask makes the puppy look like it is wearing war paint. The markings on the dog’s face remind Clarke of her dream Lexa’s war paint. Her heart immediately skips a beat at the sight of the small puppy in Lexa’s arms.

_“He was in the fountain.”_

_“I can see that. He is totally soaked.”_

_“Clarke….can we keep him?”_

_“I don’t know. Are you allowed to have pets in your apartment?”_

_“Probably. Look at his little face Clarke. He’s so freaking cute!”_

_“Will Anya let you bring a dog into the apartment?”_

_“Well. I don’t know. But how could she say no to this little face?”_ Lexa holds the tiny pup up in the air towards Clarke. Clarke takes the husky into her arms with a small sigh. The dog lets out a small whine before cuddling into her body. The tiny ball of fur is still damp, but he is no longer shivering.

 _“He is so sweet!!”_ Clarke nuzzles her face into the puppy’s side, breathing in the smell of the dog.

 _“I know.”_ Lexa pulls her phone out of the pocket of her borrowed shorts. _“We should take a picture with him and send it to Anya. There is no way in hell that she will say no when she sees how cute he is.”_

_“But I’m all wet from the fountain.”_

Lexa has to bite her lip to stop the moan from escaping her mouth. The way that Clarke’s slightly husky voice says wet makes the seemingly innocent word seem so filthy. Lexa can’t stop the jolt of arousal that shoots through her core. She shakes her head from side to side to clear her obviously sex deprived mind. _“You look fine. Now quit being a party pooper and take a picture with us.”_

_“Fine.”_

Clarke moves closer to Lexa, trying to ignore the way that her heart flutters when her shoulder presses against the other girl’s. She shifts the puppy in her arms so that he is pressed between her and Lexa’s sweaty bodies. Lexa rests her head against Clarke’s, lifting her phone up to line their faces up in the shot. The two women smile as Lexa quickly snaps the photograph. She angles her phone towards Clarke, awaiting her friend’s approval. Clarke barely glances at the picture before nodding, too enthralled with the small bundle of fur encased in her arms. Lexa pulls up Anya’s number in her contacts, attaching the photo in a message to her best friend.

**Heda Leksa: (01:30 p.m.)** _Found a little treasure at the park with Clarke. Can we keep him?_

**Onya Kom Trikru: (01:30 p.m.)** _Nou na kom au, Heda._ **(Cannot happen, Commander.)**

**Heda Leksa: (01:30 p.m.)** _Haukom na, Onya? Ai op gon ha presh em ste._ **(Why not, Anya? Look at how precious he is.)**

**Onya Kom Trikru: (01:30 p.m.)** _Du yu vout in yu taim?_ **(Do you think you have time?)**

**Heda Leksa: (01:31 p.m.)** _Sha, Onya. Beja._ **(Yes, Anya. Please.)**

**Onya Kom Trikru: (01:31 p.m.)** _Ait._ **(Alright.)**

**Heda Leksa: (01:31 p.m.)** _SHA!! Mochof, Onya. Ai hod yu in sis._ **(YES!! Thank you, Anya. I love you sis.)**

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (01:32 p.m**. **)** _Shof op, Leksa. Ai hod yu in seintaim, joka. Kom op hou_ **(Shut up, Lexa. I love you too, fucker. Come home.)**

 _“Do you mind if I put this on my Instagram?”_ Lexa questions, looking up from her phone to meet Clarke’s gaze.

_“I guess not.”_

_“Sweet.”_ Lexa uploads the photo to her Instagram account with the caption:

_-Found this tiny ball of fluff swimming in a fountain. I think that @_ **princessgriffers** _and I should name him Fish.-_ **#workoutshenanigans  #runningwithmyfavoritebarista #hessocute**

Lexa slips her phone back into her shorts after the photo uploads. She looks up at Clarke, a smile spreading across her lips as she watches Clarke with the puppy. Clarke’s bright blue eyes are alight with joy as she holds the now sleeping puppy against her chest.

_“You ready to head back to my apartment?”_

_“Are you going to let me borrow some clothes?”_

_“Of course. Unless you want to walk around my apartment naked.”_

_“Well. I mean. Raven’s my roommate and best friend, so it’s not like she hasn’t seen me naked before. You’ve seen the top half…Anya’s the only one that hasn’t been graced with my naked body, but I’m pretty confident about all of this.”_

_“You should be.”_ Lexa husks, unable to stop her eyes from ogling her friend’s body.

_“Quit staring, you perv. Let’s take our baby home.”_

_“Fish.”_

_“What?”_

_“I think that we should name him Fish.”_

_“You want to name a puppy Fish?”_

_“Yes.”_

Clarke laughs at the determined look on Lexa’s face. _“Why?”_

_“I just think that it’s appropriate. We found him in the fountain after all.”_

_“Makes sense.”_ Clarke nuzzles her face into the puppy’s neck. _“You wanna be named Fish, little guy?”_ The puppy lets out a little whine at being disturbed. _“I think he likes the name, Lex.”_

 _“I think so too.”_ Lexa feels an almost overwhelming sense of domesticity at the scene in front of her.

_“Well Lexie, let’s take Fish to his new home.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Falling in love was definitely not something that Anya had ever planned for. She had never really been in love before. She dated when she was younger, but none of her relationships became serious. And she wasn’t really keen on putting herself out there after watching her best friend get destroyed by her love.

She was not prepared at all for one Raven Reyes to come storming into her life. Raven waltzed her way into Anya’s life and completely tore down every wall that she had placed around her heart.

Anya didn’t think that it was possible to fall in love with somebody that she had only known for a month, but sure enough, here she is. Lying in her bed next to her girlfriend, Anya’s thoughts are completely consumed by her feelings towards her girlfriend.

 _“Mmm. I can feel you thinking.”_ Anya shivers as Raven’s warm breath washes across the back of her neck. She can feel Raven’s lips pressing against her skin, causing goosebumps to erupt across her neck. _“What are you thinking about?”_

_“Hmmm. A super sexy brunette that I know.”_

_“Is that so? Anybody I know?”_

_“Maybe…”_

Anya lets out a small laugh as Raven’s fingertips dig softly into the flesh of her very ticklish abdomen. Anya squirms in Raven’s arms, turning to lie on her back. Raven immediately moves her body to straddle her girlfriend’s hips, pinning her to the bed. Her hands move quickly across the expanse of newly uncovered flesh, fingertips pressing into spots where she knows Anya is extremely ticklish. Anya’s body begins to flail against Raven’s as squeals escape her lips.

 _“Rae, stop.”_ Anya’s breathless reply only spurs Raven on, her efforts doubling as she relentlessly tickles her girlfriend. The high pitched squeaks that she is letting out as her body squirms are enough to make Raven’s heart beat faster.

 _“Or what? You aren’t in the best position to be making demands, my dear.”_ Raven leans down to capture Anya’s lips while still running her hands softly up and down her girlfriend’s sides. Anya continues to squirm against Raven’s ministrations, groaning against her girlfriend’s lips. Anya slides her hands underneath Raven’s shirt, scraping her nails across her girlfriend’s taut stomach. Raven’s hands still on Anya’s hips as a desperate moan escapes her lips.

 _“Hmmm. Is that so?”_ Anya’s hands slide up Raven’s abdomen, stopping when they reach her heaving chest. Anya cups her girlfriend’s ample chest, flexing her hands to give an experimental squeeze. _“I’m pretty sure that I’m the one in control right now.”_ She runs her fingers over Raven’s nipples, pinching the puckered flesh softly.

 _“I don’t think so.”_ Raven grinds her hips down into her girlfriend’s, eliciting a moan out of her. Anya’s hips lift up to meet Raven’s next grind, desperately seeking friction against her girlfriend. _“I think that I am in control right now babe.”_

 _“Whatever you say.”_ Anya’s hands grip the hem of Raven’s tank top, tugging at the fabric. _“You’re wearing too many clothes.”_

 _“Let’s change that, shall we?”_ Raven lifts her arms up so that Anya can pull the tank top over her head. Anya tosses the top blindly behind them as her hands immediately find purchase on Raven’s hips. Anya tugs at Raven’s hips, grinding her girlfriend’s center against her own. The wanton moan that escapes Raven’s lips is almost enough to send Anya over the edge. The thin fabric of their pajama shorts creating a delicious friction that is almost maddening to Anya.

Raven hooks her fingers into the waistband of Anya’s shorts, pulling the fabric down her girlfriend’s legs as she moves down her body. Her mouth presses soft kisses and nips on her journey, leaving love bites in her wake. She leaves matching hickeys on the Anya’s inner thighs before turning her attention to Anya’s core. She doesn’t waste any time, running the tip of her tongue through slick folds. Anya lets out a loud moan as one of her hand’s tangles into Raven’s brunette locks.

 _“Fuck, Rae!!”_ Anya’s hand tightens almost painfully in Raven’s hair as she circles her tongue around her clit. Anya’s hips cant up to meet Raven’s probing tongue. Raven moans against her girlfriend’s center, sliding her tongue down to tease Anya’s entrance. Anya tugs on Raven’s hair, pulling her face firmly against her center. Raven just circles Anya’s entrance, mercilessly teasing her girlfriend. _“Beja niron..”_ **(Please lover..)** Anya moans out, pressing harder against Raven’s face. Raven grips her girlfriend’s hips, pinning her against the bed. She pulls her face away from Anya’s center with a growl. Anya smirks, knowing that even though Raven doesn’t understand much trigedasleng, it still manages to drive her crazy when she speaks it.

 _“Please, what?”_ Raven questions, moving one of her hands to slide two of her fingers lightly through soaked folds.

 _“Beja, ai gafen yu. Jos jok ai. Beja hodnes.”_ **(Please, I need you. Just fuck me. Please love.)** Raven moans, the unknown language on her girlfriend’s tongue making her arousal soar to an unexpected height. After another whispered _‘Beja,’_ Raven finally takes mercy on Anya, sliding two fingers inside of her. Both women moan simultaneously, Anya at finally being filled, and Raven at the tight muscle enveloping her fingers.

_“Jok, Reivon. Beja gyon au snap.”_ **(Fuck, Raven. Please go fast.)**

Raven can’t understand most of what Anya is saying to her, but the husky tone of her girlfriend’s voice is enough to tell her that she is doing something right. The way that the trigedasleng is rolling off of her girlfriend’s tongue is almost too much for her to handle. She’s pretty sure that she has ruined the pair of pajama shorts that she borrowed from Anya, but she is way past caring by now. She speeds up her ministrations, her head dipping back down to take the Anya’s clit into her mouth. She flicks her tongue against the bundle of nerves, matching pace with her thrusts.

 It doesn’t take Raven long to send her girlfriend over the edge, the sensitivity still present from their last bout of lovemaking making the combination of her fingers and tongue too much for Anya to handle. After a few deep thrusts curled towards Anya’s front wall, she arches her back off of the bed as her orgasm tears through her body. Raven’s name falling from Anya’s lips like a chant into the otherwise quiet room. Raven continues to thrust lazily in and out of her girlfriend, helping Anya ride out her orgasm. Raven lets up only when Anya begins to squirm. Anya lets out a sad groan as Raven removes her fingers. She meets her girlfriend’s lust blown eyes, reveling in the way that they darken even more as she cleans off her fingers with her mouth. Anya lets out a moan, biting down on her bottom lip to stifle it slightly.

Before Raven knows it, she is being slammed into the mattress by her girlfriend. Anya’s lips are insistently pressing against hers, coaxing them open with her tongue. Anya’s tongue slides into Raven’s mouth, swallowing her groan. When air becomes a necessity, Anya breaks her lips away, kissing down Raven’s jaw until her lips meet her girlfriend’s neck. She sucks at the pulse point, marking the skin as one of her hands slides down Raven’s taut abdomen, seeking out her prize. Raven grasps her wrist as it makes its way under her sleep shorts, stopping her descent. Anya lifts her head up to meet Raven’s eyes, her gaze questioning.

_“Why’d you stop me?”_

_“I want you to fuck me.”_

_“What do you think I was trying to do?”_

_“Not with your fingers.”_

_“Well.”_ Anya leans back down to run her tongue up the shell of Raven’s ear, eliciting a moan out of her girlfriend. _“Do you want me to use my tongue?”_

 _“God.”_ Raven moans, arching her back to thrust her hips into Anya’s, _“Yes, but no,”_ she manages to pant out.

 _“Tell me what you want.”_ She whispers into Raven’s ear, biting down sharply on the lobe.

_“You know what I want.”_

_“Maybe. But I want to hear you say it.”_

_“I want you to use The Mechanic.”_

Anya laughs softly, pressing her lips against Raven’s cheek. _“I thought that you didn’t want to name it.”_

_“Shut up. Are you up for it or not?”_

_“I feel like I should be asking you that question.”_

_“I wouldn’t ask you if I didn’t want it. Beja, Onya.”_

Hearing Raven beg her in trigedasleng coaxes a primal growl from Anya’s lips. She pins Raven’s shoulders against the mattress, dropping her mouth back into the crook of her girlfriend’s neck. She bites down harshly on Raven’s pulse point and then moves her mouth down her girlfriend’s collarbones. Anya leaves love bites on both sides before turning her attention to the ample flesh at her disposal. She brings her hand to the left breast, kneading the flesh between her fingers. She puts her mouth on the other breast, leaving small love bites until she reaches the nipple. She sucks the puckered flesh into her mouth, rolling the sensitive flesh softly between her lips. Raven moans loudly, pressing her chest harder against her girlfriend’s mouth.

_“Fuck! Baby, please.”_

Anya pulls away from Raven’s chest with a wicked gleam in her eyes. She leans back up to capture her girlfriend’s lips in a passionate kiss, laying herself bare as she tries to express all of her feelings against Raven’s mouth. When they break apart, completely breathless, Raven rests her forehead against Anya.

_“Don’t move.”_

Anya slides off of her girlfriend, leaning over the edge of the bed to grasp the black box underneath. She sits at the edge of the bed, opening the box to pull out the contents. Anya sets the boy shorts and silicone toy on the bed before putting the box back on the ground.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Raven is pretty sure that she has never been as turned on as she is right now. Watching Anya stand up from the bed to pull on the boy shorts makes a fresh wave of arousal flow through her. The fire in her girlfriend’s eyes is almost too much for her to bear. Raven pulls her ruined shorts down her legs and tosses them off of the bed as Anya pulls her shirt off.

She watches in fascination while Anya slips the silicone toy through the hole in the briefs. Raven bites her bottom lip to stifle her moan, the sight of her girlfriend’s new appendage making her clench her thighs together. Anya crawls back between Raven’s legs, gripping the brunette’s hips to settle herself. Raven can feel the silicone resting against her center. She lifts her hips up to slide against toy, moaning at the friction against her clit. She looks up to meet Anya’s deep brown gaze and she isn’t able to hold back her groan as her girlfriend looks at her with pure adoration. She can feel the prickling of tears in the corners of her eyes, her body suddenly overcome with the emotion of the moment.

Anya leans her face down to meet her girlfriend’s, kissing Raven softly. One of her hands curls against the side of Raven’s neck, fusing their mouths together. Her free hand grips the toy, sliding the dildo through soaked folds, eliciting a moan from the younger girl. She gathers up some of Raven’s arousal and spreads it across the expanse of the toy.

Anya breaks the kiss, whispering breathlessly against Raven’s lips. _“Are you ready, baby?”_

Raven nods softly against Anya’s forehead, unable to form a coherent sentence. She gasps loudly against Anya’s lips as she slowly slides the toy inside of her entrance. Anya inserts the dildo slowly, sliding it in inch by inch. She stops when she reaches the hilt, allowing Raven to adjust to the delicious stretch.

 _“Babe.”_ Raven whines, bringing her hands up to grip her girlfriend’s sides. The action brings their hips impossibly close together, making them both moan at the friction. _“Please, move.”_

Anya grabs Raven’s hands, interlocking their fingers as she brings them over the brunette’s head. She dips her head down to kiss Raven softly as she sets a slow pace with her hips. Her thrusts are shallow, eliciting small gasps from her girlfriend’s lips. She slides one of her hands out of Raven’s grip, bringing it to rest against the side of her girlfriend’s neck. Her breath catches in her throat when she meets her girlfriend’s gaze. Raven’s eyes are swimming with love and adoration, glossy with unshed tears. The look in Raven’s dark brown eyes are almost Anya’s undoing. She longs to speed up her ministrations, knowing that it won’t take much to send her girlfriend over the edge. As much as she wants to send her spiraling into oblivion, the look that Raven is giving her right now makes her hold back.

The realization that she had fallen completely in love with Raven didn’t really come as a surprise to Anya. It just came as a fleeting thought while they were cuddling on the couch a week ago, watching something mindless on television. The way that Raven was curled against her chest, sighing softly as Anya twirled a brunette lock around her index finger made her heart beat erratically against her ribcage.

She expected to feel an overwhelming sense of panic at the prospect of being in love. Especially considering her reluctance to try after having to watch as Lexa was completely destroyed by heartbreak. Instead of fear, all she felt was complete, unadulterated joy.

The sense of wonderment in Raven’s eyes as she searches Anya’s face makes her believe that Raven has finally figured something out. Almost as if she has finally managed to fit the entire puzzle together. Anya knows in that moment that she isn’t alone in her feelings. That Raven is just as much in love with her as she is with the brunette.

That very thought is what helps Anya make her decision to draw out her girlfriend’s pleasure until she is begging for release. She won’t stop until Raven is screaming out her name.

 _“Fuck Anya!”_ Raven cries out, wrapping her legs around the Anya’s torso. Raven’s heels dig into Anya’s lower back, pulling their bodies tightly together. _“Harder please.”_

Anya slides her hands down Raven’s body, stopping to grip slim hips. She pulls back until only the tip of the toy is still inside of Raven, taking a deep breath before thrusting back into the hilt. They both let out deep moans when she bottoms out.

 _“Is this what you want Raven?”_ Anya pulls back and thrusts again, keeping her pace slow and her thrusts deep. _“Do you like it when I fuck you like this?”_

 _“God, yes,”_ Raven moans, hips canting to meet Anya’s thrusts, _“Just like that.”_

Anya continues her maddeningly slow pace, eliciting loud moans and groans out of her girlfriend. Each thrust of her hips presses the base of the toy against her in a delicious way. It doesn’t take long for Anya to forget why she was keeping such a slow pace. She has built herself up to her peak quickly and she knows that it won’t take much more to send her over the edge. She can tell that Raven is close too, just by looking at her. Raven’s eyes screwed shut and a light sheen of sweat is glistening on her body. Her breath is coming out in short gasps and pants, and her hips are rolling against Anya’s in an uncontrolled rhythm. She can feel Raven clenching around the toy, making it hard for her to keep up her pace.

 _“Jok, Reivon. Krei joken os. Ai gaf in yu kom op raun ai_.” **(Fuck, Raven. So fucking good. I want you to come around me.)**

Raven is pretty sure that she about five seconds away from losing it. The slow pace that Anya is using as she thrusts into her is maddening enough. But the pace pales in comparison to the look of adoration that Anya is giving her right now. It’s almost as if Anya is gazing right into Raven’s soul, and it makes her feel like she is the only woman in the world.

She manages to keep her climax at bay, which is a feat in itself considering the agonizingly slow pace that Anya has been keeping.

Raven loses that last thread of control when Anya moves her hand over her mound, her thumb pressing softly against her bundle of nerves. She can’t fight back the gasp that she lets out when Anya runs a tight circle over her clit.

_“Fuck! Please babe. I’m so close.”_

_“I can tell.”_

Raven moves her hands from above her head to run them up Anya’s abdomen, stopping to rest on her girlfriend’s chest. She cups Anya’s breasts softly, groaning as Anya moves faster with each squeeze. The haphazard rhythm that Anya is trying to keep lets Raven know that her girlfriend is close.

_“Anya, please. Make me come.”_

_“Yu gaf in kom op?”_ **(You want to come?)** Anya questions as she slightly speeds up her thrusts. The resounding moan that her girlfriend makes her last thread of control snap. She loses all sense of her original goal, setting a brutal pace at her girlfriend’s begging request.

_“Fuck! Sha! Keep going! Beja.”_

Anya growls loudly, bringing her mouth down to her girlfriend’s neck. She bites down harshly on the fluttering pulse point as she drives the toy into Raven. Raven moans loudly at the mixture of pleasure and pain, her hands moving to rest on Anya’s hips. She scratches at the soft flesh, leaving reddened marks in her wake.

 _“Kom op gon ai hodness.”_ **(Come for me love.)**

_“Fuck!!!”_

Raven lets out a keening moan as her climax hits; her body going completely rigid underneath Anya after a few rapid thrusts. Anya continues to thrust into Raven, helping her girlfriend through her orgasm. The base of the toy grinding against her clit sends Anya over the edge immediately following Raven, her own low moan leaving her lips. Her hips keep moving as she rides out her own orgasm. She reluctantly pulls the toy out of her girlfriend as soon as she can feel her legs, dropping her exhausted body onto the mattress. Raven lets out a pathetic whine at the loss, turning immediately to lie on her side.

Anya pulls the toy out of the briefs and sets it on the bedside table before turning her body to cuddle up against her girlfriend. Raven lets out a small moan, her body sensitive from her powerful climax. She musters up her last bit of strength, moving her boneless body so that she can face her girlfriend. Anya’s eyes are closed tightly, her breath coming out in harsh pants. Her mostly naked body is glistening with sweat. Raven tucks her body into Anya’s, burrowing her face into her girlfriend’s neck. Anya lets out a soft moan as Raven presses her lips against the soft skin of her girlfriend’s neck.

In that moment, with her girlfriend’s fingertips running up and down her back, Raven can’t hold back anymore. Her heart feels so full that she is afraid that it might actually burst. She knows that this is the perfect moment to finally say the words that she has been wanting to say to Anya for the past week. She musters up her last bit of courage to finally utter those three words.

_“I love you.”_

Anya sucks a deep, shuttering breath in through her nose, her hands stilling on Raven’s back. After a minute without a response, Raven feels her nerves set in. She attempts to pull her body away from her girlfriend’s, only to be stopped when Anya’s arms tighten around her waist. She manages to pull her face out of Anya’s neck, meeting her girlfriend’s eyes.

Anya’s eyes are glistening with tears, a few of them trailing down her cheeks. The look in her girlfriend’s eyes quells all of her doubts and she feels her own tears prickling in her eyes. Anya is the first one to close the distance, capturing Raven’s lips in a sweet, tear filled kiss. Raven can’t tell which one of them is crying, but she’s pretty sure that they both are. In this moment, she can’t bring herself to care.

Anya pulls away from the kiss, returning her girlfriend’s sentiment.

_“I love you too.”_

Raven has little time to react before her lips are being captured once again. She kisses back with equal fervor, pouring all of her feelings into the kiss.

**~*~*~*~*~***

They spend the better part of the morning wrapped up in each other on Anya’s bed. Their whispered declarations of love and sweet kisses turn into multiple rounds of love making before they finally decide to leave the room.

After a rather intense shower together, they collapse on the couch. Neither girl has the strength to get up off the couch until sometime around lunch time. They probably would’ve spent the rest of the day cuddling in the living room, if Raven’s stomach hadn’t decided that it required sustenance. At the incessant growling, she finally decides to make them something to eat. She untangles her body from her girlfriend’s, getting off of the couch with a grunt.

 _“What do you want to eat babe?”_ She asks, leaning down to press her lips against Anya’s temple.

_“Hmm. I really don’t care. Whatever you feel like making is fine with me.”_

_“I live in a dorm babe, if you don’t give me something specific to make, you are going to be eating pb and j.”_

_“I don’t care if we eat uncooked ramen. Just hurry up and come back to me.”_

_“Oh my god,”_ Raven laughs as she makes her way into the kitchen, _“You are such a sap.”_

_“Shut up you asshole.”_

_“You love me.”_

_“Yeah, I do.”_

Raven’s heart pounds erratically against her ribcage at Anya’s confirmation. She is still in utter disbelief that she managed to get Anya to talk to her. Let alone fall in love with her. It’s almost as if she is walking around, trapped in the most glorious dream that her mind could conjure up. All she knows in that moment is that if this is a dream, it’s one that she never wants to wake up from.

Anya’s attention is locked on her cell phone when Raven comes back into the living room holding a plate with two sandwiches and some chips. She sets the plate down on the table before sitting down next to her girlfriend. The tip of Anya’s tongue is hanging out of the side of her mouth in concentration as she taps furiously on her phone screen. Raven has to bite back a laugh at how cute her girlfriend looks while she is trying to concentrate.

_“Why are you staring at me?”_

_“Because you’re cute.”_

_“I am not. I’m a badass.”_

_“Sure you are babe.”_ Raven laughs as she snuggles into Anya’s side. _“What are you playing?”_

 _“Tap titans.”_ Anya grumbles as she continues her assault on her phone.

 _“How do you play it?”_ Raven questions as she sneaks a glance at the screen. Her brow furrows in confusion as she watches her girlfriend play.

_“You tap the screen.”_

_“Is that it?”_

_“Pretty much. You go through stages and you can upgrade your characters and special powers and stuff.”_

_“That sounds pretty lame.”_

_“Shut up.”_

Raven laughs lightly, turning her attention away from the game on the screen. She continues to watch Anya concentrate on the game for a few minutes, until her stomach makes another loud grumble. Kissing Anya softly on the cheek, Raven sits up so that she can grab her sandwich. She takes a huge bite of the delicious peanut butter and jelly confection, chewing thoroughly before swallowing it.

_“Come on babe, you need to eat.”_

_“But I only have an hour left for this tournament and I am in fourth place.”_

_“Seriously?”_

_“Yeah.”_

Raven rolls her eyes at her girlfriend, reaching over to snatch the phone out of her hands. She puts the device down her shirt, looking over at her girlfriend with a sly grin.

_“Eat the damn sandwich or I won’t give you your phone back.”_

Anya raises her eyebrow in disbelief. _“Don’t think that I won’t reach down your shirt and grab that.”_

_“God woman. You are insatiable. Eat your freaking sandwich before I shove it down your throat.”_

_“Don’t threaten me with a good time.”_

_“You’re ridiculous.”_

Anya grabs her sandwich off of the plate, locking eyes with Raven before taking a huge bite. She chews a few times, opening her mouth to show off the partially chewed food.

_“Is that better, mom?”_

_“You’re disgusting.”_

Anya laughs heartily at her girlfriend, chewing down her sandwich haphazardly before swallowing it.

The two women eat in comfortable silence, sitting as close together as possible without impeding on the other’s space. Raven is almost done with her food when she lets out a loud squeal, causing Anya to jump in fright.

_“What the hell, woman!!! You about gave me a heart attack.”_

_“Sorry. Your phone vibrated down my shirt and it scared the shit out of me.”_

_“Oh. I wonder if it’s Lexa. I haven’t heard from her all day.”_

_“Maybe she is busy banging Clarke.”_

_“Yeah right. Those two idiots are making me feel sexually frustrated. So if they don’t figure their shit out soon, I’m thinking about locking them in a room until they can’t take the tension anymore.”_

_“That’s probably a good idea.”_

_“We might have to.”_ Anya puts the last bite of her sandwich in her mouth with a small grin. _“Can I have my phone now?”_

 _“I guess.”_ Raven pulls the phone out of her top, reluctantly handing it over to her girlfriend.

Anya leans over to peck Raven’s lips quickly as she grabs her phone. She unlocks the device, checking her notifications. She opens the unread message from Lexa with a gasp. Lexa is holding a tiny, wet puppy in her arms with a huge smile on her face.

**Heda Leksa: (01:30 p.m.)** _Found a little treasure at the park with Clarke. Can we keep him?_

Raven glances over as Anya opens the picture. She lets out a loud scream, grabbing Anya’s arm to pull the phone closer to her face.

_“Oh my god!! Look at that little face.”_

_“Apparently Lexa and Clarke found it at the park.”_

_“He’s really fucking cute.”_

_“She wants to bring him home.”_

_“Oh….”_

Raven lets go of Anya’s arm, clapping her hands together excitedly. Anya can’t be positive, but she thinks that Raven might actually be bouncing on the couch in excitement. She turns her attention away from her phone to glance at her girlfriend. Her suspicions are confirmed when she looks over, Raven is practically shaking with anticipation.

_“Calm down twitchy.”_

**Onya Kom Trikru: (01:30 p.m.)** _Nou na kom au, Heda._ **(Cannot happen, Commander.)**

Anya knows that she is eventually going to change her mind. She has never been very good at saying no to her best friend. And with her girlfriend giving her the saddest puppy dog eyes that she has ever seen, she knows that she doesn’t stand a chance. That doesn’t stop her from trying to stand her ground.

**Heda Leksa: (01:30 p.m.)** _Haukom na, Onya? Ai op gon ha presh em ste._ **(Why not, Anya? Look at how precious he is.)**

She can picture Lexa, texting her with the biggest pout on her face. She chances another glance at her girlfriend, which she quickly realizes was a huge mistake. Raven’s dark brown eyes are pleading, begging Anya to just say yes to Lexa. Anya lets out a sign, knowing that she is fighting a losing battle. She may as well concede defeat now.

**Onya Kom Trikru: (01:30 p.m.)** _Du yu vout in yu taim?_ **(Do you think you have time?)**

**Heda Leksa: (01:31 p.m.)** _Sha, Onya. Beja._ **(Yes, Anya. Please.)**

Please. Having Lexa text her that one word was the straw the broke the camel’s back. She doesn’t know if she is just super sappy today because of her and Raven’s talk earlier. Or if she just can’t stand the thought of disappointing both her best friend and her girlfriend. Either way, she knows that she is completely fucked.

**Onya Kom Trikru: (01:31 p.m.)** _Ait._ **(Alright.)**

**Heda Leksa: (01:31 p.m.)** _SHA!! Mochof, Onya. Ai hod yu in sis._ **(YES!! Thank you, Anya. I love you sis.)**

 **Onya Kom Trikru: (01:32 p.m**. **)** _Shof op, Leksa. Ai hod yu in seintaim, joka. Kom op hou_ **(Shut up, Lexa. I love you too, fucker. Come home.)**

Anya puts her phone down on the living room table with a sigh. She looks over at her girlfriend, who is positively gyrating in place from the amount of excitement coursing through her body.

_“So…”_

_“So what?”_

_“Is the dog coming home with Lexa and Clarke?”_

_“Ugh. Yes.”_

_“Oh my god!!! YASSSS!!!!”_

Raven throws her body into her girlfriend’s, knocking them back into a laying position on the couch. She aggressively captures her girlfriend’s lips in a passionate kiss, slipping her tongue past Anya’s lips. Anya lets out a moan into Raven’s mouth, kissing her back with equal fervor.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Walking back to Lexa’s while wearing wet clothes was not high on Clarke’s list of things that she enjoyed. It was especially unpleasant when said clothes were tight to begin with. They’ve been walking for a few miles now, and Clarke is tired of adjusting the wet fabric that is clinging to various areas of her body.  Her patience is being seriously tested, and she is pretty sure that she is on the verge of becoming hypothermic.

By the time they reach Lexa’s front door, Clarke can’t fight the shivers that are racking her body. She is unbelievably cold and she is pretty sure that her teeth are chattering so hard that they are going to crack. She snuggles Fish tightly against her chest, nuzzling her face into the soft fur of the puppy. Fish lets out a soft whine at being woken up and it sends fuzzy feelings straight to her heart.

When the two women walk into to apartment, they immediately notice their two friends, all but banging each other on the couch. Various items of clothing are strewn across the room and Raven is straddling Anya’s hips. As soon as Raven hears the front door close, she stands up quickly with a squeal. She makes her way over towards Clarke, as fast as she possibly can without her brace.

_“PUPPY!!!”_

Raven takes Fish out of Clarke’s arms, holding his face against hers. She presses kisses all over his face, whispering nonsensical words in his ear.

_“So….banging on the couch.”_

_“Lexa…what did we say about that?”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“GEORGE.”_

_“Shut up!”_

_“Okay. So this dog is so fucking cute. What did you decide to name him?”_

_“Fish.”_ Clarke replies, moving down the hall towards Lexa’s room. _“Lexie, I am going grab some dry clothes out of your room.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Griffin!!! Hurry up. We have puppy shopping to do.”_

_“Aye aye, Captain.”_ Clarke mock salutes her best friend before disappearing down the hall into Lexa’s room.

_“So, since you and Clarke are obviously the mothers of this little bundle of joy, does that make me an aunt? Is his name Fish Griffin-Woods? Or Fish Woods-Griffin?”_

Lexa turns to face Raven, her eyes wide with terror.

_“Really, Raven?”_

_“What? I mean you guys found him together. And it’s only a matter of time before you two realize that you belong together. I mean, you guys aren’t doing the whole lesbian couple thing right. You’re not supposed to start your family until after you move in together. But then again you aren’t supposed to make out with your friends and you guys have done that. So you’re kinda going about this in a not so conventional way as it is. When are you guys going to move in together?”_

_“Rae! Leave her alone!”_ Clarke comes out of Lexa’s bedroom, pulling on a long sleeved grey shirt. Lexa has to choke back a groan at the sight of Clarke in her grey shirt. The fabric is fitted tightly across her body, the buttons at the top undone, revealing her very generous ‘assets.’ Lexa finds herself transfixed on Clarke’s chest, ogling the creamy flesh like a hormonal teenaged boy.

Her lust filled staring is quickly broken when Clarke clears her throat dramatically. Lexa’s eyes shoot up the meet Clarke’s amused stare. Lexa smile sheepishly at her friend before turning her attention away, a deep red blush spreading across her cheeks.

_“Well. As much as I enjoy standing in the middle of this eye fucking contest that you two seem to be locked in, I have puppy supplies to go buy. Let’s go Griffin.”_

_“Yes. I’m ready.”_

_“Alright, Griffin-Woods clan, time to depart.”_

_“Raven. I am so going to kick your ass.”_

_“Bring it, Princess.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Oh my god! We have to get this sweater. It has tiny skulls on it.”_

_“Yes. But do you think that he needs more than one sweater Rae?”_

_“Well. I mean this one is lighter. More like a fall sweater. Then we have the thicker coat for winter.”_

_“He’s a husky though. Isn’t he made for cold weather?”_

_“I mean. I think that they use huskies as sleigh dogs but he’s just a baby. He’s bound to get cold.”_

_“We live in California. We like never get snow. Why would he need a thick winter coat?”_

_“Because it’s fucking plaid, Clarke! And look at how cute he looks in it.”_

Clarke looks down at the tiny puppy in the cart. She lets out a sigh of defeat, knowing that Raven is right.

_“Fine. We’ll get the plaid jacket.”_

_“Yass.”_

Raven lifts her fist in the air in triumph, tossing the sweater into the cart. The two women make their way through the pet store, picking up a few essential puppy items and even more not so essential items. By the time they make their way to the front of the store, they have picked out three different coats for Fish, two different collars and various bags of treats. After dropping a whopping two hundred dollars on their new family member, they make their way towards Anya’s car. Raven pulls out her phone as they stand outside of Anya’s car.

_“Clarke. We have to put a selfie on Instagram of Fish in his plaid sweater.”_

_“Okay.”_

The two women stand close together while holding Fish between them. They look towards Raven’s outstretched hand, smiling as she takes a picture. Raven uploads with photo to her Instagram account, captioning it accordingly.

-@ **HedaLeksa and** @ **princessgriffers are the proud new mommies to Baby Fish Griffin-Woods. As his Aunt, it is my job to spoil him. Just look at him bringing out his inner lesbian with a fabulous plaid coat.-**

Raven smiles at the caption before closing the app. She tucks the phone back into her jeans before unlocking the car. The two women pile the items into the car before settling Fish into the backseat.

_“So, how are things going with Anya?”_

_“They are going.”_

_“Seems pretty serious.”_

_“Yeah. I um…maybe told her that I loved her last night.”_

_“WHAT!!!!”_ Clarke is glad that they are currently at a stop light, because if they weren’t, she probably would’ve rear-ended the car in front of them. She whips her head towards her best friend, her blue eyes wild with shock. _“You did what?”_

_“I told her that I loved her.”_

_“Did you mean it?”_

_“Yes. Why wouldn’t I mean it?”_

_“I don’t know Rae. You guys have only been together for like a month. Isn’t it a little too soon for the l word?”_

_“I mean. Maybe. I don’t know. When I look at her, it’s just. It’s like my heart stops and speeds up at the same time.”_

_“Oh my god. You’ve turned into such a sap Reyes.”_

_“Shut up or I will punch you in the vag.”_

_“Dude. That’s just rude. Why would you want to abuse the lady bits like that?”_

_“Well. You’d be getting more action than you’ve been getting.”_

_“Don’t be a dick.”_

_“I’m just speaking the truth. When are you and Lexa going to get your heads out of your asses and just bang already? You two are making my ovaries hurt.”_

_“I told her that I would give her time to figure everything out. She’s getting there. I just have to be patient.”_

_“How long is that going to be?”_

_“It takes as long as it takes Rae. She lost a lot. I’m just thankful that she’s even trying.”_

_“God. You really like this girl.”_

_“Of course I do. She’s amazing.”_

_“I’m glad that you’ve found somebody. Especially after how things went with Finn.”_

_“I feel the same way, Rae. You deserve to be happy too. And I know that Anya makes you happy. Plus not everything that came around because of Finn was a bad thing. He brought us together.”_

_“That’s true. I wouldn’t change anything, Griffin.”_

_“I love you too asshole.”_

Raven chuckles at her best friend. _“Just drive the car Princess. Take us home to our girls.”_

_“Yes dear.”_

 

 

 

**-TBC-**


	11. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for an end of semester party. Can our girls really be trusted when they have been drinking???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chapter update time!!! Yay!!! This is the chapter that I have been waiting to bring to you guys for what feels like forever. Just ask the Beta. I’ve been talking this chapter up for at least two months now, so I am sure that she is tired of hearing about it. Well today, she can be happy because it has finally come to fruition and is complete. Now that I have talked you guys up, I will deliver the bad news. Except I don’t really think that it is bad news.
> 
> I have been sitting on an idea for a Pitch Perfect story for as long as I’ve talked about this chapter. I have been so distracted by the urge to write this story, which means that updates have been taking me longer than I would like. I made myself a deal, when I completed this chapter, I would allow myself the time to post the first chapter of my new Pitch Perfect fic. So for the rest of this week, I will be working on that. Now, this is my main fic, so I will not abandon it. But I am going to try and spilt updates between the two. If I start to take too long, please be patient with me, I am really excited for this new fic.
> 
> So anyways, I am done ranting now. Read on and enjoy!!! Feel free to let me know what you think about this chapter by commenting or coming over to yell at me on Tumblr.
> 
> Enjoy, my wonderful readers. And thank you for sticking with me through this tumultuous ride. Thank you for all of the views, comments, likes, bookmarks, and kudos. I appreciate each and every one of them.
> 
> Thank you Randomme103 for dealing with my craziness as always. And for not allowing me to stray too far off track during updates.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Barista’s Choice**

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Chapter 10**

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“I am so freaking tired. This semester was the longest once so far, I swear.”_ Raven flops down next to Clarke on her bed. Her friend is sprawled out on the hard mattress, eyes screwed tightly shut, her face serene like she is asleep.

_“You’re telling me. I just want to sleep for the entire summer.”_

_“Is that a thing? Can we like, do that?”_

_“Ugh. I wish. But apparently I am being forced to go home for a while this summer.”_

_“I mean. You get to spend time with Abby, so I am totally jealous.”_

_“Rae, you’ve never even met my mom. I don’t understand your obsession with her.”_ A bloodshot blue eye peeks out from behind a cracked eyelid, locking on Raven’s prone form.

_“I like moms. I can’t help it. O’s mom is a fox too. But Abby just makes my lady bits tingle.”_

_“Ugh, so gross.”_

_“You love it.”_ Raven lays her head on Clarke’s shoulder with a soft sigh. _“So what are your plans for your first afternoon of freedom?”_

_“I made plans with Lexa to go pick up outfits for Bell’s wedding.”_

_“What about my nephew?”_

_“I think that Anya said that she’d watch him while we were gone.”_

_“Yassss. Babysitting my best friend’s son that she had out of wedlock.”_

_“Rae. Why are we best friends again?”_

_“Because we wouldn’t work out as girlfriends.”_

_“What?”_ Clarke’s eyes snap open at her best friend’s statement. Her frightened gaze flits towards Raven’s amused one.

_“Oh please. Don’t tell me that you’ve never thought about it.”_

_“I mean.”_

_“You’re hot Clarke. I’m hot. We’d be hot together. But we would probably kill each other. So naturally we become best friends.”_

_“Oh my god. Is she really talking about hooking up with you, Princess?”_ Raven and Clarke both sit up on the bed at the sound of Octavia’s voice. She walks into the dorm holding a bowl of popcorn. She sets the bowl down between Raven and Clarke and sits down on the edge of the bed, pulling her knees up to her chest.

_“Yes.”_

_“She pulled the same conversation with me last year.”_

_“Raven, sometimes I swear you are worse than a guy.”_

_“You bitches love it.”_

_“Speaking of, Miss Reyes. Clarkey here told me that you have some news to share.”_

_“I have no clue what you’re talking about.”_ Raven drops her gaze from Octavia’s, busying herself by grabbing a handful of popcorn. She shoves the popcorn into her mouth and chews it loudly.

_“Oh no?”_

_“No.”_ Raven replies through a mouth full of popcorn.

_“So you didn’t drop the ‘L’ bomb on your girlfriend right after she fucked you silly?”_

_“O!”_

_“What? That’s exactly how you told me.”_

_“Yeah. But I didn’t expect you to repeat it.”_

_“Well then you shouldn’t have told me.”_

_“Okay, look. Yes, I told Anya that I love her.”_

_“After she fucked you silly?”_

Raven scratches at the back of her neck nervously. _“Well I mean….”_

_“With the Mechanic.”_

_“Clarke!! I told you that we weren’t going to call it that. And so you go and tell O?”_

_“Well yeah. I mean she is our best friend. She deserves to be in the loop.”_

_“I hate you, Princess.”_

_“No you don’t.”_ Clarke cheekily replies through a mouthful of popcorn.

_“Speaking of being kept in the loop, Rae, did Clarke tell you that on Sunday I came here because Bell wanted to talk to her. And when I came into the room, Lexa was pinning her to the bed.”_

_“No,”_ Raven’s says, her eyebrows rising in shock, almost disappearing into her hairline, _“She did not inform me of that.”_

_“Yeah, well. That’s not even the best part.”_

_“Oh do tell what the best part was.”_

_“Well. Not only was our best friend…”_

_“Guys. Isn’t that enough?”_

_“Nope. Princess, it is your turn to be embarrassed. So grin and bear it while O finishes this wonderful story.”_

_“Fine.”_

_“So as I was saying, our best friend was being straddled on this bed by a very half naked brunette.”_

_“WHAT!!!” Clarke…did you guys finally hook up?”_

_“No, no way. Not that it is any of your business, but we didn’t hook up. I took her pants off so that she wouldn’t sleep in her jeans. She was so drunk; I wouldn’t take advantage of her like that.”_

_“Awww…we know that Clarke. We are just teasing you.”_

_“You two are bitches.”_

_“You love us. We’re just looking out for your lady bits Clarke. I don’t know if girls can get blue balls. Like blue ovaries, I guess. But if they can, how are you not dead?”_

_“Seriously, the sexual tension between you and Lexa is pretty ridiculous. Even Lincoln commented on it. And he is like never around us.”_

_“Don’t you think that I know that, O?”_

_“Jeez, no need to get testy Princess.”_

_“You guys don’t understand. I am pretty much dying here. But I am trying to give her the time that she needs to heal. I don’t want to push her too hard and end up losing her before I even get a chance.”_

_“But is it really fair for her to keep you waiting like this?”_

_“I mean. It’s not ideal, no. But I will wait.”_

_“Yeah,”_ Raven scoffs, _“Until your ovaries explode from sexual frustration.”_

_“I don’t think that can happen.”_

_“You don’t know. You’re not a doctor.”_

_“Fuck off.”_

_“No thanks babe. You should probably do that though. It might make you less of a raging bitch.”_

_“Wow, Rae real nice. Maybe the whole raging bitch thing is because I work two jobs when I’m not in class, so sleep is a much forgotten luxury.”_

_“Well. You can take a nap while O and I catch up on Walking Dead.”_

_“But,”_ Clarke juts her bottom lip out in a pout, _“I wanna watch Walking Dead too.”_

_“Princess. We all know that you are going to fall asleep anyway.”_

_“She’s right Clarke. You might as well rest up for the party and Anya and Lexa’s tomorrow.”_ Octavia says between handfuls of popcorn.

_“Speaking of. Princess. I have an idea that might help speed up you little wannabe tryst with Lexa. Do you still have Niylah’s phone number?”_

_“Yes. Why?”_

_“Text her and ask her to come to the party with you tomorrow.”_

_“No way. That would be super rude of me. Not to mention hella awkward.”_

_“Yeah. But hear me out. Lexa does crazy things when she’s jealous right?”_

_“I guess so.”_

_“Well when she gifted you with my old friend George, were you or were you not previously on the phone with Niylah?”_

_“I had just hung up with her, yes.”_

_“So she was jealous. That mixed with your super sexual display of cleaning her face made her snap. Hence, George was born.”_

_“Oh my god, Clarke she’s right. Rae, you are a genius.”_

_“Duh. Tell me something that we don’t know.”_

_“You’re not humble at all.”_ Clarke scoffs, settling back against the headboard.

 _“Fuck humble. You don’t have to be humble when it’s true.”_ Raven smirks at her two friends before turning her attention back towards Clarke. _“So I really think that this will work out in your favor. You text Niylah and ask her to come to the party with you. Lexa will be super jealous and BOOM! She’ll make a move.”_

_“This sounds like a terrible idea.”_

_“No, it’s foolproof, trust me.”_

_“I don’t know.”_

_“Just do it. Or give me your phone and I’ll do it.”_

_“No. I’ll do it. I just feel like it’s a bad idea.”_

Clarke grabs her phone off of her nightstand and opens her contacts. She pulls Niylah’s name up in her contact list, composing a new text message to the brunette.

 **Sexy Bartender: (11:30 a.m.)** _Hey Niylah. How are you doing?_

 **Niylah: (11:30 a.m.)** _Hello, Clarke. I am honestly surprised to hear from you. I am doing well, how are you?_

**Sexy Bartender: (11:31 a.m.)** _Why are you surprised to hear from me?_

**Niylah: (11:31 a.m.)** _Well, you know. You don’t usually hear from somebody that you’re kind of dating after they break things off with you._

 **Sexy Bartender: (11:32 a.m.)** _I mean. I didn’t anticipate that we wouldn’t talk anymore after I ended things between us._

 **Niylah: (11:32 a.m.)** _That is what normally happens._

**Sexy Bartender: (11:33 a.m.)** _Well that is not what I want to happen._

**Niylah: (11:33 a.m.)** _Fair enough. So what can I do for you today?_

**Sexy Bartender: (11:34 a.m.)** _I wanted to see if you had any plans tomorrow night._

**Niylah: (11:34 a.m.)** _Nothing that I know of. Why do you ask?_

**Sexy Bartender: (11:35 a.m.)** _Well, would you like to accompany me to a party?_

**Niylah: (11:35 a.m.)** _Hmmm… I don’t know._

**Sexy Bartender: (11:36 a.m.)** _Please : (_

 **Niylah: (11:36 a.m.)** _I suppose that I might be talked into being on the arm of a beautiful blonde for the evening. Will there be alcohol present?_

**Sexy Bartender: (11:37 a.m.)** _Um. You are talking about a party with a bunch of college students. At Raven’s girlfriend’s apartment. Of course there will be alcohol._

**Niylah: (11:38 a.m.)** _So…Raven’s girlfriend? You mean Lexa’s best friend Anya? Lexa, who lives in the same apartment. The very same brunette that you dumped me for?_

 **Sexy Bartender: (11:39 a.m.)** _You make it sound so unpleasant._

 **Niylah: (11:39 a.m.)** _It definitely isn’t high up on my list of desires to hang out at the house of the girl who stole the same heart that I was fighting for, no. I can’t help that I am a sore loser._

 **Sexy Bartender: (11:40 a.m.)** _I’m sorry, Niylah. I really am. I still really want to be friends with you. I can understand if you don’t feel the same way._

 **Niylah: (11:41 a.m.)** _That’s not it Clarke. I do want to be your friend. I’m sorry that I’m still a little bit salty about the whole thing._

**Sexy Bartender: (11:42 a.m.)** _Don’t be sorry. You have every right to be salty. But you shouldn’t be salty at Lexa. She had nothing to do with it. This was completely my fault._

**Niylah: (11:43 a.m.)** _Let’s not play the blame game. I’m not mad at you, just the situation. I should’ve approached you the first time that I saw you. This would be a completely different story, I bet._

**Sexy Bartender: (11:44 a.m.)** _Well, we can’t change the past. That doesn’t mean that we can’t be friends. Please come to the party with me._

**Niylah: (11:45 a.m.)** _Alright, I’ll go to the party with you. If only for the hope that you get drunk enough to make out with me._

 **Sexy Bartender: (11:46 a.m.)** _That’s not friendly behavior, Niylah._

 **Niylah: (11:46 a.m.)** _Is it not? I’ll have to inform Lexa of that._

 **Sexy Bartender: (11:47 a.m.)** _Touché. So I’ll see you tomorrow?_

 **Niylah: (11:47 a.m.)** _Yes, sexy blonde bartender. You will see me tomorrow._

**Sexy Bartender: (11:48 a.m.)** _Awesome!!! ;)_

_“Alright Rae, you win. Niylah is going to come to the party with me.”_ Clarke breaks the silence in her room. She sets her phone back down on her bedside table with a sigh.

Raven holds her finger up in the air to signal for Clarke to hold on for a second. She types away at her phone with a grin on her face.

 **Ai Hodnes: (11:50 a.m.)** _We are set. Niylah is coming to the party with Clarke. Now we just need to fuel the jealousy of our two idiot friends. That mixed with alcohol is sure to make them snap._

**Tombom Ripa: (11:51 a.m.)** _God I hope so. I can’t handle their shit anymore._

**Ai Hodnes: (11:51 a.m.)** _It will work. Just provide the alcohol and I will do the rest._

 **Tombom Ripa: (11:52 a.m.)** _Sounds like a plan. Are you coming over later?_

 **Ai Hodnes: (11:52 a.m.)** _I don’t know. I feel like I’ve been neglectful of my friends lately. I should probably spend some time with them. And you should spend some time with Lexa._

 **Tombom Ripa: (11:53 a.m.)** _At least you’ve been neglecting your friends for really good sex. Also, Lexa is busy with that fucking dog of hers._

 **Ai Hodnes: (11:54 a.m.)** _You’re not wrong about the sex but, you love that ball of fur._

 **Tombom Ripa: (11:55 a.m.)** _Not really. He ate one of my shoes._

 **Ai Hodnes: (11:55 a.m.)** _Well, he’s a puppy. They do that._

 **Tombom Ripa: (11:56 a.m.)** _Yeah, but it was my favorite pair of sneakers._

 **Ai Hodnes: (11:56 a.m.)** _I don’t know what to tell you, babe._

 **Tombom Ripa: (11:57 a.m.)** _Tell me that I can strangle him._

 **Ai Hodnes: (11:57 a.m.)** _NO!! He’s just a baby!!!_

 **Tombom Ripa: (11:58 a.m.)** _He is a menace._

 **Ai Hodnes: (11:58 a.m.)** _If you hurt him, no sex._

 **Tombom Ripa: (11:59 a.m.)** _Well, that’s just rude. Plus there is no way in hell that you will be able to cut me off. Your libido is out of control._

 **Ai Hodnes: (11:59 a.m.)** _Try me ;). Btw what does the contact name that you put for yourself mean?_

**Tombom Ripa: (12:00 p.m.)** _We’ll see who lasts longer. It means heart killer._

**Ai Hodnes: (12:00 p.m.)** _Seems fitting. Okay, I have to spend some time with Clarke and O before they kick my ass. I’ll talk to you later. :-*_

 **Tombom Ripa: (12:01 p.m.)** _Sounds good. Have fun with the girls. :-*_

_“Alright bitches. Let’s watch some zombie killing goodness!”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“I have no idea what I am going to wear tonight, Rae.”_

_“I mean, you could go naked. That ought to make it impossible for Lexa to keep her hands off of you.”_

_“Yeah, so I’m not so sure that is a good idea.”_

_“Why not?”_

_“I just don’t think that it would be a very good idea for me to be naked in public, Rae.”_

_“Live a little, Griff.”_ Raven shifts her body restlessly, moving half of her body to hang off of her bed. Clarke looks over at her friend, laughing at Raven’s antics. She plops down on the bed next to Raven, eliciting an exasperated sigh from the brunette.

_“Clarke, as much as I love having a half-naked woman in bed with me, I’m kind of spoken for.”_

_“Shut up Rae. If you would just get off of your ass and help me pick out an outfit, I wouldn’t be sitting on your bed in my bra and underwear.”_

_“Hey. I’m not complaining. Anya might not like it though.”_

_“Well, help me find something to wear then.”_

_“I have just the outfit in mind. It will make Robo Barbie swoon and potentially tear your clothes off and fuck you in front of all of our friends.”_

_“Jesus, Rae. You are like obsessed with me getting laid.”_

_“Well shit. Have you seen Lexa, Clarke? She’s fucking gorgeous. And apparently interested in you. So you need to lock that shit down before it is too late.”_

_“I’m going to regret letting you pick out my outfit, aren’t I?”_

_“Hmmmm….I think that you are going to love it.”_

_“We’ll see about that.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Having a party at the end of a very stressful semester was exactly what Clarke needed. She couldn’t wait to let her hair down and get her drink on. But she was pretty terrified of being drunk around Lexa. Her crush on the other girl was already hard enough to contain when she was sober. Add a bit of liquid courage into the mix, and Clarke isn’t sure if she is going to be able to control herself.

She doesn’t know how strong Lexa’s self-control is, but she is pretty positive that they are going to end up putting it to the test tonight. Their ‘friendship’ is like a tightly coiled spring, ready to snap if even the slightest amount of tension is introduced. It’s only a matter of time before the spring snaps and they collide into each other. Clarke desperately hopes that Lexa is ready when the inevitable happens.

The outfit that Raven has picked out for her is really working for her. She feels like she looks really hot in the tight blue jeans and lacy black spaghetti strap top that Raven chose. The tight fabric hugs her hips in the best way, and the lace is tight across her front, accentuating her already ample chest. Her cleavage is on point and Clarke is confident that Lexa will be unable to keep her hands to herself.

She admires the outfit in front of the full length mirror that is mounted on her and Raven’s closet. She lines up her body so that the outfit fits in the screen of her phone, snapping a quick selfie to send to Octavia for approval.

 **O-face: (04:25 p.m.)** _Damn girl!! You look really fucking hawt!!!_

**Princess: (04:25 p.m.)** _So does this outfit get the Octavia Blake stamp of approval?_

**O-face: (04:26 p.m.)** _Absofuckinlutely! Lexa will not be able to keeps her hands off of you when she sees you in that._

**Princess: (04:27 p.m.)** _I don’t know that that is the plan._

**O-face: (04:27 p.m.)** _Of course that is the plan. You two need to hook up already. It’s starting to affect the rest of us._

 **Princess: (04:28 p.m.)** _Why do you and Rae always bring it back to be about you?_

 **O-face: (04:28 p.m.)** _Because when Princess Peach isn’t getting any, it’s like none of us are getting laid._

**Princess: (04:29 p.m.)** _OMFG O?!?! You did not just refer to my vagina as Princess Peach._

**O-face: (04:30 p.m.)** _Oh I most definitely did._

**Princess: (04:30 p.m.)** _Octavia MARIE Blake. You swore that you would never mention that name again._

**O-face: (04:31 p.m.)** _Well, it’s not my fault that you nicknamed your kitty when we were in high school._

**Princess: (04:32 p.m.)** _And now you are calling it ‘my kitty.’_

**O-face: (04:32 p.m.)** _Would you rather I say pussy?_

**Princess: (04:33 p.m.)** _NO!!_

**O-face: (04:33 p.m.)** _PUSSY! PUSSY!! P….U….S….S….Y!!!_

**Princess: (04:34 p.m.)** _Stop it O!!_

***Rae Bae has been added to this message.**

**Rae Bae: (04:34 p.m.)** _Did somebody say pussy?_

**O-face: (04:35 p.m.)** _Rae!!! We were just talking about how Princess Peach needs some action._

**Princess: (04:35 p.m.)** _Please tell me that you didn’t tell Rae the story of Princess Peach, O._

**O-face: (04:36 p.m.)** _Okay. I didn’t tell Raven the Princess Peach story. :/_

**Princess: (04:36 p.m.)** _You’re lying, Octavia._

**O-face: (04:36 p.m.)** _Well, why did you even bother asking? Of course I told Rae._

**Rae Bae: (04:37 p.m.)** _And I think that Princess Peach needs some loving from the Commander. Like some serious banging._

 **Princess: (04:38 p.m.)** _JFC. Why am I friends with you guys?_

**Rae Bae: (04:38 p.m.)** _Because we are going to help you dust off the cobwebs that Princess Peach has accumulated._

**Princess: (04:39 p.m.)** _I don’t need you guys to help me get laid._

**Rae Bae: (04:39 p.m.)** _Yes you do. If we leave it up to you, you both will die before you figure your shit out._

**O-face: (04:40 p.m.)** _Agreed._

**Princess: (04:40 p.m.)** _I hate you bitches._

**Rae Bae: (04:41 p.m.)** _We love you too, Clarke. O….are you ready?_

**O-face: (04:41 p.m.)** _I will be in about 20 minutes. Still gotta do my hair._

**Rae Bae: (04:42 p.m.)** _Well, hurry the fuck up. I need you to help me grab alcohol._

**O-face: (04:42 p.m.)** _I’ll be ready by the time you get here._

**Princess: (04:43 p.m.)** _I’ll see you hookers in a little bit._

**~*~*~*~*~***

Bringing Niylah into Lexa’s apartment was definitely a weird feeling. Clarke was feeling extremely keyed up and nervous as she walked through the front door with her friend.

She knew that Niylah was still harboring some feelings towards her, and Clare couldn’t help but feel slightly awkward towards the entire situation.

Bringing her ex-dating buddy(?) to the house of the girl that she was currently trying to court felt wrong to Clarke. She knows that Lexa and Niylah don’t exactly get along. So she isn’t sure how Niylah is going to handle the whole situation now that Clarke is vying for another woman’s attention.

Everything seems to be going well so far. Granted, they just walked through the door. But Clarke has hope that maybe things won’t go horribly wrong tonight. She just wants to have a good time with her friends. And maybe push Lexa’s control a little bit.

The house is already packed by the time they walk in, the smell of sweat and alcohol strongly lacing the air. The music is loud, bass shaking the thin apartment walls. Clarke feels sorry for Anya and Lexa’s neighbors, having to deal with a bunch of rowdy, drunk college students. She’s fairly certain that the party will be broken up by the police in no time. So she might as well enjoy the party while she can, before she is forced to flee the property, lest she end up in jail.

 _“Do you want something to drink?”_ Her question startles Niylah, causing the older woman to jump/

 _“Sure.”_ Niylah answers, leaning in closely so that Clarke can hear her over the pounding bass.

Clarke nods her head before walking into the small, cramped kitchen. Anya is standing near the refrigerator, pouring vodka into a plastic cup. She lets out a wolf whistle when Clarke walks up to her, flashing Clarke a sly smile.

 _“Looking good Clarke.”_ Anya hands Clarke the plastic cup that she was just filling up, grabbing another one for herself.

 _“Thank you.”_ Clarke takes a long pull of her drink, grimacing at the burn of the alcohol.

_“Thanks for coming to our end of semester shindig.”_

_“Thank you for inviting me.”_

_“My pleasure, milady.”_

_“Where is your girlfriend?”_

_“She is dancing with Octavia.”_

_“Why aren’t you out there with her?”_

_“Because O is waiting for Lincoln to get back from the store with Lexa. So since I hijacked her boyfriend, I figured that I could loan her Raven for a bit.”_

_“Oh. Where did you send Lexa and Lincoln?”_ Clarke downs the last of her drink quickly, successfully managing to not grimace this time.

_“I had to send them out to grab pizza and to pick up the keg. They should be on their way back now.”_

_“Awesome. Well, I came in here to grab a drink for me and Niylah, so I’d better go back out there before she thinks I forgot about her.”_

_“You brought Niylah?”_ Anya feigns ignorance, taking a swing of her drink with her eyebrow raised at the other girl in mock disbelief.

_“Yeah. Raven told me to bring her.”_

_“I don’t think that Heda is going to like that very much.”_

_“Oh well.”_ Clarke shrugs her shoulders. She grabs the bottle of vodka a pours herself another cup. As soon as her cup is full, she makes a drink for Niylah. She raises her cup towards Anya with a grin, an _‘I’ll see you later,’_ leaving her lips before she leaves the kitchen.

 _“This is going to be interesting,”_ Anya mutters to herself as she slams back the rest of her drink.

~*~*~*~*~*

_“Ugh. Why did Anya force me to go out and do laborious work?”_

_“Quit complaining, Woods. Get your shit together and help me with this keg.”_

_“You’re a dick Linc.”_

_“And you’re a whiner. Now hurry up and lift the other side so we can bring this heavy bitch inside.”_

_“Fine.”_ Lexa sticks her tongue out at Lincoln as she hoists up her half of the keg with a grunt. The two of them carry the keg through the front door of the apartment with little struggle. They drop it off in the kitchen, Lincoln heading back out to his truck to grab the pizzas while Lexa taps the keg. As soon as the keg is tapped, she pours herself a beer, chugging the cool beverage down quickly. As she pours another cupful, her best friend sidles up to her.

_“Thanks for going to get the keg, Heda.”_

_“It’s not like you gave me much of a choice, gona.”_ **(Warrior)**

_“Well. I mean, you could’ve said no.”_

_“Oh yeah. Like that was an option.”_

_“Still, you could’ve tried.”_

Lexa rolls her eyes at her best friend, muttering, _“Whatever,”_ as she takes a drink of her beer.

_“Your girlfriend finally showed up.”_

_“She’s not my girlfriend, Anya.”_

_“Okay, fine. Your ‘friend’ that you like to make out with and play dj diddles to thoughts of.”_

_“JESUS!”_ Lexa sputters loudly as she takes an inhale of her beer. She throws her free hand towards Anya, smacking the other girl in the arm, hard. _“Can you keep your fucking voice down, please?”_

_“Why? Afraid that somebody will tell Clarke that she is your spank bank material?”_

_“You’re disgusting.”_

_“You love me.”_

_“Hardly.”_

Lexa turns to walk away from her best friend, stopped by calloused fingers wrapping around her bicep. She turns to look at Anya again, an exasperated look on her face. _“What?”_

_“She’s not here alone.”_

_“Okay?”_

_“She brought Niylah with her.”_

_“Oh.”_ Lexa grabs Anya’s cup out of her hand, downing the contents quickly. She coughs at the burn of the alcohol but swallows it anyway. _“Fuck. Was that straight vodka?”_

_“Pretty much. I put a splash of sprite in there.”_

_“My god Anya. Are you trying to get white girl wasted or something?”_

_“Well, I’m Asian so that would be impossible.”_

_“You know what I mean, asshole.”_

_“Of course I’m trying to get wasted. Why wouldn’t I be?”_

_“I don’t know.”_

_“Okay. Enough talking. More drinking needs to happen now.”_

_“Lead the way, boss.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Lexa’s back.”_ Raven whispers in Clarke’s ear, her hands gripping her best friend’s hips. Clarke’s back is against Raven’s front, her arms wrapped around her best friend’s neck. Clarke sways her hips to the pounding bass of the music, grinding her body against Raven’s.

 _“I know.”_ Clarke drops her body with the beat, sensually sliding her backside up against Raven’s front.

_“Where did Niylah run off to?”_

_“She had to take a phone call outside.”_

_“So. How are we going to make Lexa incredibly jealous?”_

_“Well. I am pretty sure that this is a good start. Although, your girlfriend doesn’t look too happy about it.”_

Both women look over to the other side of the living room. Anya and Lexa are leaning against the wall in the corner of the room. Anya’s arms are crossed over her chest, a red cup hanging idly from her left hand as she watches Clarke and Raven dance. She almost looks apathetic at the scene in front of her. If it were not for the fire that Clarke can see in Anya’s eyes, she might’ve thought that Anya could care less.

Lexa on the other hand, is not so good at hiding what she is feeling. Clarke can read every emotion splayed across Lexa’s face. Her hand is tightly clutching her plastic cup, to the point of it bending. Her eyes are ablaze in fury as she watches Clarke dance with Raven. Her jaw is firmly set, making her already amazing jawline look even more unbelievable. A jawline that Clarke wants to feel underneath her tongue, as she moves her mouth down the brunette’s body until her tongue meets the apex of Lexa’s thighs. Clarke bites her lip to suppress the moan that wants to escape, her blue eyes locking with Lexa’s darkened green ones. Lexa raises her eyebrows towards her friend, a slight scowl marring her otherwise perfect features. Her staring contest is broken when Raven’s hands squeeze her hips tightly.

_“Clarke?”_

_“Hmmm?”_

_“We have to stop.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because you are starting to porn star grind on me. If that isn’t enough of a reason, Lexa looks like she is about to skin me alive. And I am not okay with that.”_

_“May I cut in?”_

_“God yes please. I am afraid that Clarke is about to start humping my leg. Take her off of my hands, please Niylah.”_

_“Don’t mind if I do.”_

_“You ladies have fun. I’m going to go hang out with my girlfriend now. The look that she is giving me now tells me that I am in for a rough night.”_

_“Gross Rae.”_

_“It’s okay to be jealous, Clarke. Since you won’t be getting fingerbanged this evening.”_

Clarke flips Raven off as she walks away. Clarke turns around to face Niylah and wraps her arms around Clarke’s waist, pulling the other girl tightly against her body. She sways them from side to side, completely out of tempo with the music. Clarke rests her arms on Niylah’s shoulders, interlocking her fingers behind the other girl’s head.

_“Sorry that I had to step away.”_

_“It’s fine. I understand.”_

_“So…are you enjoying the party?”_

_“I’m having an alright time.”_

_“Just alright?”_

_“Hmm. I feel like I need to ingest more alcohol.”_

_“So why isn’t that happening right now?”_

_“I mean, we could.”_

_“SHOT TIME!!!!”_ Raven pushes her way between the two women, breaking their embrace apart. She has a bottle of tequila in one hand and a stack of shot glasses in the other. There is another woman standing next to Raven that Clarke has never met before. She regards the unfamiliar woman with a soft smile and a raised eyebrow pointed towards her best friend. _“This is Ontari. She’s in a few of my classes.”_

_“Nice to meet you, Ontari. I’m Clarke and this is my friend Niylah.”_

_“Nice to meet you guys as well. Now I don’t know about you three, but I would like to get fucked up.”_

_“Sounds like a plan to me.”_ Clarke pulls her body out of Niylah’s arms. The four of them make their way out of the apartment.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Jealousy. That was all that Lexa could feel. Her entire body was thrumming with it. Watching Clarke grind on Raven was enough to make her grind her teeth until her jaw was throbbing. And she’s pretty sure that she broke through her cup from digging her nails into the plastic. She had to use the wall to hold her up as she watched Clarke grind her ass into Raven’s front.

Lexa lost all ability to control her emotions as soon as she saw Niylah cut in and wrap her arms around Clarke. Watching the girl that has a vice grip on her heart turn in the brunette’s arms and sway out of beat to the music makes her entire body shake with rage. She tosses back the contents of her damaged cup with a growl, causing her best friend to turn towards her.

 _“Yu pis, Heda?”_ **(You angry, Commander?)** Anya nudges her best friend, concern written all over her face.

_“No.”_

_“Ai nou wich in yu, Leksa.”_ **(I don’t believe you, Lexa.)**

_“Onya, em pleni!”_ **(Anya, enough!)**

Lexa storms out of the living room, stopping in the kitchen to snatch a random bottle of liquor off of the counter before making her way into her bedroom. Slamming her bedroom door, she tiredly plops down on her bed. She cracks open the bottle without glancing at the label and takes a long drink from it. She swallows the liquor quickly, coughing from the harsh taste of the Jack Daniels.

She leans back against her pillows with a sigh, taking another hearty pull off of the bottle.

Lexa knows that Clarke doesn’t owe her anything. After all, she told Clarke not to wait for her. She doesn’t have the right to be so unjustly jealous while she was watching Clarke dance with Raven and Niylah. She has no claim over the blonde. But her heart doesn’t seem to be following the same path that her brain is.

It took everything in her to stay rooted in her spot while Niylah had her hands all over Clarke. It was bad enough for her to have to watch Raven’s wandering hands as they ground their bodies together. If it weren’t for the fact that she knew that Clarke and Raven were just friends, she might’ve lost her cool and cut in to break them apart.

As soon as Clarke turned around in Niylah’s arms and started to intimately sway their bodies together, she couldn’t take it anymore. She could feel the walls of the living room closing in on here and she had to get out of there before she made a mistake that she would regret in the morning.

She hates that she isn’t ready to take a risk on Clarke yet. Every single time that she thinks that she is ready; her brain reminds her that she’s not. It almost feels like she is taking three steps backwards for every single step that she takes forward. It’s maddening to think that even after three years of being without Costia, she still isn’t ready to give love another chance.

Clarke has been nothing short of amazing since they started hanging out. She has expressed interest in Lexa, but hasn’t tried to push her at all. As soon as Lexa told her that she wasn’t ready, Clarke gracefully took a step back and became one of the best friends that Lexa could’ve ever asked for. Granted, they are pretty much the world’s worst friends, but they are friends nonetheless.

Clarke. Just thinking about the blonde bombshell is enough to make Lexa’s heart race. She honestly never thought that she would have feelings for somebody after losing Costia. If Lexa’s being honest with herself, her feelings for Clarke are more intense than her feelings for Costia were at the beginning of their relationship. She’s pretty sure that what scares her so much about Clarke is the fact that without even trying, Clarke has managed to burrow her way deeply into Lexa’s heart.

She was halfway through the bottle before she managed to slow herself down. Her body felt heavy and sluggish from the fast consumption of the liquor. Her brain felt slightly fuzzy, yet her thoughts of Clarke were still running rampant. She set the bottle down on her floor with a sigh before stretching out on her bed. Clarke is the last thing on her mind as she closes her eyes for just a second.

Resting her eyes for a second turned into a full blown drunken nap. Lexa’s not really sure how long she has been sleeping but her drunken state has not improved at all. In fact, if she is being honest, it is probably worse. But her current state of drunkenness is nothing compared to the girl that just stumbled into her room.

 _“HEDA!!!”_ Octavia trips over her sluggish feet and nearly face plants onto the carpet. A pair of heavily muscled arms wrap around Octavia’s waist to keep her upright. She lets out a drunken giggle as Lincoln helps her stand back up.

Lexa sits up in her bed with a grunt, trying to shake the sleep from her body. She meets the gaze of the drunken girl at the side of her bed, smirking as she watches Octavia sway slightly from side to side.

_“Sha Okteivia? Haukom dula op yu min kiln Heda’s rid op?”_ **(Yes Octavia? Why do you intrude on the Commander’s rest?)**

Octavia’s brow furrows in confusion as she tries to decipher Lexa’s trigedasleng. She has been teaching Lincoln her and Anya’s childhood language during their workout sessions. He has caught onto the made up language quickly and is fast becoming as fluent as Lexa and Anya are. Lexa knew that he would probably teach some of what he has learned to Octavia, not that she really minds in the slightest.

“Wigod op osir, Heda.” **(Forgive us, Commander.)**

_“Linkon, ron ai ridiyo op. Haukom yu kamp raun hir?”_ **(Lincoln, speak true. Why are you here?)**

_“Klark kom skaikru gaf in ai op Heda.”_ **(Clarke of the sky people wants to see the Commander.)**

_“Haukom?”_ **(Why?)**

_“Em don nou biyo.”_ **(She did not say.)**

 _“Mochof, Linkon.”_ **(Thank you, Lincoln.)**

 _“Pro, Heda.”_ **(You are welcome, Commander.)**

Lincoln lifts Octavia up and tosses her body over his shoulder, nodding at Lexa before leaving her bedroom, closing the door behind him.

Lexa gets to her feet as gracefully as possible in her slightly inebriated state. She walks over to her closet, standing in front of her full length mirror. She runs her fingers through her hair to loosen the slight tangles and fixes her sleep disheveled clothing. When she deems herself presentable, she makes her way out of her bedroom.

Her first sight as she makes her way out of her room is the giant crowd around the kitchen island. Lexa can make out Clarke’s blonde hair in the crowd. She is being helped up onto the counter by one of the guys that Lexa has seen working at the bar with her. Clarke unceremoniously pulls her shirt over her head and hands it to the guy that helped lift her up on the counter. Clarke whoops drunkenly at the crowd as she lies down on the counter.

 _“BODY SHOT!!!”_ Octavia’s drunken shout breaks out from the crowd, causing the entire group to cheer and wolf whistle loudly.

Lexa begins to make her way towards her friend, pushing her way through the crowd. She stops in her tracks as she notices Niylah walk up towards Clarke. Niylah is holding a bottle of tequila in one hand and a lime in the other. Clarke meets Niylah’s gaze and breaks out in a smile, making Lexa’s heart break slightly. Niylah rubs the lime against Clarke’s neck, moistening the skin so that she can shake out some salt onto the blonde’s skin. After salting Clarke’s neck, Niylah places the lime against the other girl’s mouth. Clarke opens her mouth and allows Niylah to put the lime into her mouth, securing it with her teeth.

Lexa can only stand rooted in her spot and watch as Niylah pours the tequila into Clarke’s bellybutton. She can feel her jealousy rising to an almost unhealthy level as she watches Niylah lick the salt off of Clarke’s neck. Lexa can’t break her gaze away from the scene before her. She is beside herself with envy as she watches Niylah slurp the tequila out of Clarke’s bellybutton before moving up the blonde’s body to take the lime out of her mouth. Their lips brush together slightly before Niylah pulls the lime into her mouth to suck the juice out of it.

_“Fuck! That was hot.”_

Lexa jumps slightly as her best friend’s voice startles her out of her self-imposed staring contest.

_“Jesus Christ Anya.”_

_“Sorry, Lex. I didn’t mean to scare you.”_

_“It’s fine.”_

_“Are you okay Heda? You seem tense.”_

_“I’m great.”_

_“That was almost convincing.”_ Anya’s hand comes up to grip Lexa’s chin, forcing Lexa to meet her best friend’s concerned gaze. _“Seriously Lexa, what’s wrong?”_

_“Nothing.”_

_“Don’t lie to me.”_

_“I mean. I’m fine, really.”_

_“I can feel the tension rolling off of you in waves Lexa. Tell me what’s wrong.”_

_“It’s stupid.”_

_“No, it’s not. Just tell me.”_

_“It’s Clarke.”_

_“What about Clarke?”_

_“Seriously?”_ Lexa scoffs, pulling her face out of Anya’s grip. _“Did you not watch what just happened?”_

_“Of course I watched Niylah take a body shot off of Clarke. It was fucking hot.”_

_“Ugh.”_

_“Oh..”_ Anya’s eyes widen in realization. _“Are you fucking jealous Lexa?”_

_“What?! No, of course not.”_

_“Oh my god, you totally are.”_

_“I’m really not.”_

_“Yeah, okay. And I am the fucking pope.”_

_“You definitely resemble an eighty year old white man.”_

_“Fuck you.”_

_“No thanks. I’m one hundred percent gay. Thanks for the offer Pope Francis.”_

_“You’re ridiculous.”_

_“Thanks Anya. I appreciate the sentiment.”_

_“What are best friends for?”_

_“Bringing your self-esteem down apparently.”_

_“Well, you’re the one that decided to go hide in your room after you saw Niylah and Clarke dancing together.”_

_“I wasn’t hiding.”_

_“Once again, I guess that I am Pope Francis.”_

_“I guess so.”_

_“How would you feel if I told you that Clarke was looking for you for the body shot?”_

_“Bullshit.”_

_“I’m serious. She was asking about you and Raven brought the idea of body shots into her head. She looked everywhere for you. She got super pouty when she couldn’t find you. So Niylah said that she would do a body shot.”_

_“Ugh. Why didn’t you come find me?”_

_“Hey. I might be your best friend, but I am not here to play matchmaker because you are too fucking stupid to figure your shit out.”_

_“I dislike you right now.”_

_“No, you reall..”_

_“Another!!!”_ Lexa’s head whips around at the sound of the partygoers. Clarke has hopped off of the counter and is now standing next to Niylah, who has her arms wrapped around Clarke’s waist.

Watching the intimate way that Niylah is holding Clarke causes Lexa to snap in her drunken state. She walks away from her best friend without another word. Her eyes are locked on Clarke, her attention completely locked on her friend. Clarke looks up and meets her eyes, a huge smile breaking out on her face. She pulls herself out of Niylah’s arms and immediately launches her body into Lexa’s.

_“LEXIE!!!”_

_“Hey Clarke.”_

_“I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”_

_“I can see that.”_

_“Where were you hiding?”_

_“I was in my room.”_

Clarke juts out her lip in a pout. _“I missed you.”_

Lexa reaches up to push back a stray blonde lock. _“I missed you too.”_

_“Wanna get a drink?”_

_“Yes. Actually, that is what I came over here to talk to you about.”_

_“What?”_

_“Well, I see that you let Niylah take a shot off of you. Now it’s your turn to take a body shot.”_

_“I mean, I guess.”_

_“That is how the game works.”_

_“I don’t know. Niylah has kind of been flirting with one of Raven’s classmates. I don’t want to mess that up for her.”_

_“How about you do the shot off of me?”_

_“Are you sure that you can handle that, Heda?”_

Lexa gulps, her tongue darting out to lick at her suddenly dry lips. _“I think that we should worry more about you, Princess.”_

Lexa watches in amusement as Clarke’s eyes darken slightly, her nostrils flaring at Lexa’s words. Lexa breaks away from Clarke, turning her attention to the crowd around them. She feels a slight surge of panic rise, seeing as all eyes are on her and Clarke. But the jealous look in Niylah’s eyes is enough to fight back the fear. She knows that she is being kind of petty, taking joy in Niylah being jealous, but she really can’t bring herself to care. She grabs the bottle of tequila and one of the shot glasses next to it.

_“Well Clarke, are you game?”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Well Clarke, are you game?”_

Every single time that Lexa says her name, Clarke has to bite back the urge to let out an obscene moan. The way that the ‘k’ rolls off of the brunette’s tongue makes an all too familiar warmth settle in her lower belly.

_“Clarke?”_

_“Hmmm?”_ Clarke reluctantly pulls her gaze away from Lexa’s lips, meeting the green eyes that she is addicted to.

_“I said, are you game?”_

_“Bring it, Woods.”_

Lexa lets out a soft chuckle that does not help Clarke’s current lack of inhibition. Clarke’s eyes stay locked on Lexa as she pours tequila into the shot glass.

_“I thought that we were doing a body shot?”_

_“Oh we are. I have a different one in mind.”_ Lexa’s voice comes out in a purr and this time Clarke is unable to stop the shiver that rolls through her body.

 _“Oi! Get on with it ladies.”_ Raven heckles the two women, effectively breaking them out of their bubble.

Lexa pulls her shirt over her head, tucking the fabric into the back of her jeans. Clarke’s eyes immediately wander shamelessly down Lexa’s body, memorizing every piece that is currently on display.

_“See something you like, Princess?”_

_“I see a lot that I like right now, yes.”_

The blush that spreads over Lexa’s face and chest is so endearing that it makes Clarke swoon. Clarke wants to do a lot of things to the brunette in this moment in time, some of them not very appropriate. She continues to watch as Lexa puts the shot glass into her bra, between the two things that turn Clarke into a prepubescent teenaged boy. She actually has to bite her lip so that she doesn’t blurt out ‘boobs’ in front of everybody in attendance.

After an extremely heated discussion with herself, Clarke manages to tear her eyes away from Lexa’s half clothed chest, only to come to an abrupt stop on the golden skin of her neck. Her eyes stay transfixed on Lexa’s hand as she rubs a lime on her neck. She gives Clarke a small smile and a wink as she tilts her head to the side to sprinkle salt onto the glistening skin.

_“Are you ready, Clarke? It’s not too late to back out.”_

_“Nope. Let’s do it.”_

_“Alright.”_

Lexa offers up one more smile before tucking the lime between her teeth.

Clarke’s mind goes completely blank at the sight of Lexa standing in front of her. All Clarke can think of is forgoing the shot and either burying her face into Lexa’s chest, or skipping the lime and kissing the brunette senseless. The loud catcalls from the crows break Clarke out of her daze. She licks her dry lips before pressing forward.

She is immediately enveloped in Lexa’s scent as her face meets the brunette’s neck. Clarke makes sure to take her sweet time, slowly collecting each grain of salt with her tongue. Lexa’s sharp intake of breath teeters off into a soft groan that only makes Clarke slow down even more as she licks down Lexa’s neck. Clarke wants so badly to bite and suck at the creamy skin under her mouth, to mark Lexa as possessively as Lexa marked her. But she knows that it will only serve to freak Lexa out and she feels like they have come so far since they met. Clarke really doesn’t want to put a damper on all of the progress that Lexa has made with her feelings.

So instead of giving Lexa an impressive hickey as payback for ‘George,’ Clarke turns her attention to the shot glass that is resting between Lexa’s breasts. She dips her head so that it is nestled between those soft pillows of heaven that she wants to live in forever. Clarke lingers for a split second before wrapping her lips around the shot glass that she wants to trade places with. Pulling her head back sharply, Clarke pours the liquor down her throat and hastily swallows it. She pulls the shot glass out of her mouth and sets it on the counter before leaning in so that her face is less than an inch in front of Lexa’s. She closes her eyes and closes the distance to take the lime out of Lexa’s mouth.

Instead of tasting the cool, tart citrus of the lime, Clarke’s mouth meets the inviting warmth of Lexa’s lips. She lets out a startled gasp that is completely drowned out by the roaring cheer of the people around them. One of Lexa’s hands runs up Clarke’s back before tangling into her hair, effectively holding her in place. The hand in her hair tightens slightly, pulling her body flush against Lexa’s. Lexa lets out a groan against Clarke’s lips that sends a shiver down her spine. The feeling of Lexa’s half naked torso being pressed against her body fills her with the all too familiar lust that she had been riddled with since meeting the brunette.

 Clarke’s mind is already fuzzy from the alcohol that she had ingested. Mixing that with the intoxicating taste of Lexa’s lips is enough to make Clarke’s head spin. Her hands move down Lexa’s sides, stopping to grip her naked hips.

It isn’t long before Clarke feels the tentative brush of Lexa’s tongue sweep across her bottom lip, asking for entry. She takes a second to respond, too shocked at the brazen action of the brunette. She eagerly responds as soon as she regains her composure, parting her lips to allow Lexa access. The first brush of Lexa’s tongue against Clarke’s elicits groans out of both girls.

Clarke’s senses are overloaded with everything Lexa that it makes her forget that they are surrounded by people in Lexa’s apartment. She tilts her head slightly to deepen the kiss even more.

Clarke kisses Lexa like her life depends on it, meeting the brunette’s tongue stroke for stroke. Before long, her restless hands move away from Lexa’s hips, coming to rest over the slight swell of her denim covered ass. She can’t suppress the urge to flex her fingers against Lexa’s booty, effectively squeezing the generous flesh between her palms. The guttural moan that comes out of Lexa’s mouth sends a warm flood of arousal straight through Clarke’s core. Clarke palms the flesh again before moving her hands down to grab onto toned thighs. She squeezes the jean covered legs, gripping them to bring them around her waist. With Lexa’s weight fully wrapped around her, she presses the brunette’s back into the kitchen counter.

Clarke breaks the heated kiss first, her head spinning from a lack of oxygen. She presses her forehead against Lexa’s, both women panting loudly in an attempt to catch their breath.

Lexa’s forest green eyes are completely black, pupils blown with desire. Her lips are swollen from their kiss, and Clarke notices the tiny freckle on Lexa’s upper lip for the first time. The small mark is so endearing that Clarke can’t stop herself from pressing their lips together again. She doesn’t waste any time before deepening the kiss this time around, slipping her tongue into Lexa’s mouth. The brunette kisses back with equal fervor, fighting Clarke for dominance of the kiss.

 _“Ladies. As much as I am personally enjoying this super fucking hot make out session.”_ Raven’s voice causes Clarke to break the kiss abruptly, her teeth nipping at Lexa’s bottom lip as she moves away. _“I kind of need the counter so that I can kick O’s ass in some arm wrestling. So if you two would be so kind as to stop giving all of these perverts a live sex show that would be awesome.”_

 _“Yeah. No problem.”_ Lexa’s voice is raspy, heavily laden with arousal. _“Clarke, you should probably put me down.”_

 _“Hmmm?”_ Clarke’s lust blown eyes lock onto Lexa’s. _“What did you say?”_

_“I said that you should probably put me down. So that we stop putting on a show for these drunken fools.”_

_“Oh, yeah. Of course.”_ Clarke reluctantly pulls Lexa away from the counter, allowing the brunette to remove her legs from Clarke’s waist so that she can stand up. The two women break away from each other, still panting slightly from their kiss. Clarke turns around to face her best friend, her face heating up in a blush at Raven’s amused smirk.

Clarke expects Lexa to freak out and possibly run away after their heated exchange.

Once again, Lexa manages to surprise Clarke.

She doesn’t freak out. She definitely doesn’t run away.

What she does is enough to make Clarke’s heart beat erratically in her chest. Lexa wraps her arms around Clarke’s waist to pull their bodies flush together. Clarke’s already arousal heavy mind short circuits as she feels Lexa’s boobs pressing against her. She can’t fight back the moan that leaves her mouth at the hardened nipples that are digging into her back. Lexa presses her lips firmly against Clarke’s cheek before resting her chin on the blonde’s shoulder.

_“Right. So. I need a drink.”_

_“Haven’t you had enough alcohol this evening? Or did you need to rehydrate after all of this? Because I’m pretty sure that all of the liquid in your mouth has travelled down to your pus…”_

_“Raven!!”_

_“What? I’m just saying. After those kisses, I’m pretty sure that you’ve ruined your underwear.”_

_“Oh my god. Seriously. Why are you so crass?”_

_“Princess, we’ve been friends for three years now. You know that I have no filter.”_

_“Alright bitch. Are you ready to lose?”_ Octavia’s slurred voice calls out as she stumbles towards her best friends.

 _“Bring it, hooker.”_ Raven taunts, perfectly sculpted eyebrows raised towards Octavia.

The two women size each other up, leaning over opposite sides of the kitchen counter to come face to face. Clarke and Lexa watch as Raven and Octavia link hands, determined looks on both of their faces. Anya walks up to the counter, places her hand on Raven and Octavia’s joined fists and counts to three before moving away.

Octavia takes the lead early off, nearly dropping Raven’s fist to the counter. After a few struggled attempts, Raven manages to move her fist back into the air. The two go back and forth for a few minutes, taking the upper hand before losing it quickly.

Raven manages to take the upper hand from Octavia and this time Octavia is not able to fight back. Raven slams Octavia’s fist against the counter, letting out a cry of victory as she does so. She releases her hold on Octavia’s hand, whipping her body around with her arms raised in the air.

_“That’s right bitches. I am fucking victorious. Nobody can beat Raven Reyes in an arm wrestling contest.”_

_“My turn.”_ Lexa calls out to Raven, crossing her arms over her half naked chest.

Raven turns to face Lexa, eyes widening in surprise.

_“No way dude.”_

_“What? Why not? Are you afraid of a little challenge?”_

_“Not at all. But you are weight training with Mr. Olympian God himself. So arm wrestling against you would be completely unfair.”_

_“Yeah, you’re afraid. That’s fine.”_

_“No…”_

_“Raven. It’s seriously fine. I understand.”_

_“Okay, fine. You want to compete against me?”_

_“Only if you want to.”_

_“Let’s compete then. But not in arm wrestling.”_

_“What would you like to compete in?”_

_“How about you put up that pretty set of abs against mine?”_ Raven pokes at Lexa’s rock hard abdomen with a smirk on her face.

 _“No way Rae. There is no way that you can beat that set of abs. I mean, just look at them.”_ Clarke’s fingers trail softly down Lexa’s bare skin absentmindedly, making the brunette shiver under her touch.

_“I may not be as fit as the Commander here, but I have a pretty awesome six pack.”_

_“You’re all talk Reyes.”_

_“Oh yeah?”_

_“I think so.”_

_“Bring it WOODS!!!”_ Raven rips her shirt off quickly and tosses it at her girlfriend. The rowdy crowd cheers at the newfound nudity in the room.

The two women stand side by side to allow the crowd to size them up. Clarke eyes the women before her. She feels a little bit weird checking out her best friend, but she just has to tell herself that it is for the competition. And Raven isn’t lying; she has a pretty impressive six pack going on.

Even as impressive as Raven’s six pack is, it pales in comparison to Lexa’s. Clarke is completely unable to tear her eyes away from Lexa’s rock hard core. Clarke has to quell the urge to reach forward so that she can run her fingers down Lexa’s stomach.

_“Sorry Rae, I’m going to have to go with Lexa on this one.”_

_“Of course you’re going to pick her. Your lady boner for Lexa is big and distracting. You don’t get a vote.”_

_“Well your girlfriend doesn’t get a vote either.”_

_“Fine. O will just have to be the unbiased vote.”_

_“Agreed. O?”_ Clarke turns to face her best friend, who is still pouting about her loss to Raven. _“Which set of abs is the winner?”_

_“Neither.”_

_“What?? What the hell O? That’s not how you judge a contest.”_

_“Well. I am inducting another challenger into this contest.”_

_“Who?”_

_“Lincoln.”_

_“No way. You can’t just add another competitor to the game.”_

_“I can and I will. Because there is no competition. Babe.”_

Octavia turns to her boyfriend expectantly, arms crossed over her chest. He sighs softly before gripping the hem of his t-shirt. He lifts the shirt over his head as he walks over to Raven and Lexa.

Clarke’s eyes trail down Lincoln’s tattoo covered chest, stopping when they land on his abdominal muscles. As soon as she is able to tear her eyes away, she looks up at Raven with a goofy grin on her face.

 _“Okay. So those abs were chiseled by the gods.”_ Clarke pitches forward slightly, running her hands down Lincoln’s chest. _“Yeah…so. Lincoln wins.”_

 _“Anya?”_ Raven’s eyes lock on her girlfriend’s, pleading with her.

_“I’m sorry Rae, but Clarke is right. Those are perfection.”_

_“I think that we are in agreeance. Lincoln’s abs win.”_

_“Well that is some bullshit. Y’all are some fucking bitches.”_

“Calm down babe.” Anya steps forward to wrap her arms around Raven. After pulling away, she helps Raven put her shirt back on. The two women walk away, Raven’s head hung low in defeat.

 _“Yassss!!!”_ Octavia cheers loudly, jumping into her boyfriend’s arms. Lincoln grips her thighs to steady her, spinning her around in a circle.

 _“Right, so…”_ Clarke grabs the much needed bottle of tequila off of the counter. She tips the bottle towards her mouth, taking a healthy drink of the liquor. Grimacing as she swallows the cheap tequila, she wastes no time before taking another drink. This time she keeps the bottle tipped until another hand wraps around hers, pulling the tequila away. Lexa takes the bottle from Clarke’s hand, taking a lengthy swallow of it before setting it back on the counter. Clarke’s eyes roam Lexa’s body quickly, and much to her disappointment, Lexa has covered her body back up.

_“Come dance with me.”_

_“Okay.”_

Lexa links her hand with Clarke’s, pulling the blonde towards the makeshift dancefloor in the living room. They find a spot that isn’t overcrowded with drunken partygoers. Lexa drops Clarke’s hand so that she can wrap her arms around the blonde’s waist. She pulls Clarke flush against her body, sighing as her body is enveloped in everything Clarke. The blonde’s arms come to rest on her shoulders, a content sound leaving her lips as they begin to move together. The slow movements of the two women are nowhere near matching to the pace of the pounding bass falling from the speakers, but they are perfectly lost in their own world.

_“Thank you for coming to the party tonight.”_

_“Thanks for inviting me.”_

_“Of course.”_

The already thumping bass changes speed as a new song begins. Clarke lets out a woot, pulling away from Lexa’s arms. Before she can protest, Clarke turns around, pressing her back up against Lexa’s front. Lexa’s hands come to rest on Clarke’s hips, fingertips pressing tightly into the skin, almost acting as an anchor for the brunette. Clarke rolls her hips against Lexa’s, causing a soft groan to leave her lips.

The already electric air between them only intensifies as their most recent intake of liquor finally kick in. Inhibitions that were already low are pretty much nonexistent for both women now.

It doesn’t take long for Clarke to turn back around in Lexa’s arms, pressing their chests together. In a brazen move, likely brought on by copious amounts of liquid courage, Lexa slips her thigh in-between Clarke’s legs. Clarke is unable to suppress the moan that leaves her lips, subconsciously grinding down slightly on the offered leg. Lexa lets out a quiet sigh, pressing her thigh harder against Clarke. Clarke rolls her hips in search of more friction. Just as she presses against Lexa’s thigh again, she is suddenly overcome with a very cold and wet feeling washing over her entire body. She lets out a loud squeal and pulls back from Lexa. The smell of beer permeates the air around her, soaking quickly into her clothes.

_“What the hell!!”_

_“Oh god. Clarke I am so sorry.”_

Clarke whips around to confront the asshole that so abruptly interrupted her and Lexa. She comes face to face with Raven’s classmate Ontari, holding two cups that are very much empty now. The cold, sticky feeling from the spilt beer elicits a shiver from the blonde as the air hits her skin.

_“Somebody tripped me. I am so sorry.”_

_“It’s fine. It was an accident.”_

_“Still. I am sorry.”_

_“Seriously, no harm, no foul.”_

_“Come on Griffin; let’s go get you something dry to wear.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke knows three things upon first waking up.

**-Her head is about to explode.**

**-She doesn’t remember the last hour or two of the party last night.**

**-She’s not alone in bed.**

She swallows a few times, trying to conjure up some moisture in her dry as the ‘Sahara’ mouth. Her arms are wrapped tightly around her bedmate’s waist, spooning the woman from behind. Opening her sleep crusted eyes; she takes in the sight before her.

 Two other things become very apparent in that moment, overloading Clarke’s body with panic and the desire to flee immediately.

**-She’s wrapped around Lexa’s body, unless she has a doppelgänger with the same exact tattoo on her back.**

The last thing that she realizes is probably the most important thing of all.

**-She is not currently dressed.**


	12. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the party.
> 
> Maybe some suit shopping?
> 
> Group hangout time.
> 
> Our girls being terrible friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*~*~*~*~*
> 
> A/N: Hello beautiful people! I’m finally back. I know that it has been forever since I’ve updated last. And for that I am truly sorry. I’ve been meaning to get this out to you guys sooner but sometimes real life happens and sometimes it sucks. So for all of you wonderful people that have been so patient in waiting, I have for you an extra-long update to make up for it. A little over 19k words. It was a beast to write, but as always, it was fun. I hope that it does not disappoint and that you enjoy the shenanigans these peeps put me through. Feel free to let me know what you thought by dropping me a review on here of you can hit me up on Tumblr……
> 
> A huge shout out to Randomme103 for putting up with my shit while I go through the creative process. She deserves it.
> 
> ENJOY!!!
> 
> ~*~*~*~*~*

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Barista’s Choice**

**~*~*~*~*~***

 

**Chapter 11**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Panic.

That was the first feeling that coursed through Clarke’s veins. After the sharp jabs of pain from the killer hangover that was currently raging inside of her body.

She can’t remember anything after being outside; they had managed to polish off the bottle of tequila in record time. Niylah and Ontari hit it off from the very beginning. It made Clarke happy to see her newfound friend chatting up the other woman. She really deserved to have somebody in her life that could make her happy, seeing as Clarke knew that she wasn’t going to be that woman.

Sitting up quietly in Lexa’s bed, Clarke wracks her brain, trying to remember the previous night’s activities. She is pretty positive that she didn’t have sex with Lexa last night. And as much as she wishes that it would actually happen, she doesn’t want her first time with Lexa to be a drunken romp.

Right now all Clarke knows is that she has got to get out of Lexa’s bed. Her flight instinct is quickly overtaking every other thought in her body, leaving her unable to try and calm herself down. Cementing her hasty decision to leave as quickly and as quietly as possible, she gets out of Lexa’s bed.

Aside from the pounding pain in her head and her body caused by her terrible decision to drink herself into oblivion last night, Clarke is now positive that she did not have sex with Lexa. She breathes a soft sigh of relief as she makes her way over to Lexa’s dresser. She opens the second drawer of the dresser, pulling out the first shirt that she sees. Pulling the third drawer open, she grabs a pair of Lexa’s workout pants.

It only takes her a few seconds to pull on her borrowed outfit. As soon as she feels presentable, she chances a glance at the slumbering brunette.

Lexa looks so much younger when she is asleep. When she is awake, Lexa looks as if she is holding the weight of the whole world on her shoulders, burdened with the shit hand that she was dealt.

What Clarke admires most about Lexa is her ability to take it all in stride. Yes, she lost who she thought was the love of her life in a tragic accident that could’ve been easily avoided. But she didn’t stop living. Sure, she is completely terrified to try and start a relationship with another person, afraid that she will lose another great love, but here she is, trying. Lexa is trying to heal so that she can take a chance with Clarke. To jump in blindly and hope that she doesn’t hit the bottom this time.

Willing her pounding heart to calm down, Clarke walks over to Lexa’s bedroom door. Hand perched on the doorknob, Clarke glances at the object of her undying affections one more time. A startled gasp leaves her lips as she meets Lexa’s sleepy gaze. Lexa blinks rapidly a few times, trying to shake the sleep from her body.

 _“Are you going somewhere?”_ Lexa’s husky sleep laced voice stops Clarke in her tracks.

 _“Um.”_ Clarke can’t keep eye contact with Lexa so her gaze drops down to her own hands. _“I was going to get some coffee. And maybe some aspirin.”_ Clarke is proud of herself for keeping her voice steady. Especially considering how fucking nervous she is right now. _“Plus I was going to go find Fish.”_

 _“He’s fine. Anya decided that she wanted him to sleep in her room last night. But, I could use some coffee. I’ll come with you.”_ Lexa moves to get out of bed, squinting as the harsh morning light assaults her eyes. She stops abruptly at the look of panic in Clarke’s eyes.

_“No, it’s okay. I’ll be right back.”_

_“Clarke….Are you okay?”_

_“Fine. I’m fine.”_

_“Are you sure? If I did something to upset you last night, I’m sorry.”_

_“No, you didn’t. I mean, I don’t think that you did.”_

_“Okay, so why do you look like you’re about to run away?”_

_“I’m not. I just really want some coffee”_

_“Sure, you do. Come sit down next to me.”_ Lexa pats the still warm spot on the bed that Clarke just vacated.

_“I dunno.”_

_“Come on Clarke.”_

Clarke moves shakily towards the bed, her blue eyes zeroed in on the spot that Lexa’s hand is resting on. She wills her thudding heart to calm down as she moves across the room. Pulling in a deep breath through her nose, she gathers enough courage to sit down next to Lexa.

It’s ridiculous for her to be nervous, really. After all, they were just cuddled up together a few hours ago in this very bed. But for some reason, Clarke can’t stop her thoughts from running rampant through her mind, setting her nerves on fire in a bad way. She’s pretty sure that this easy air between them is only temporary. One minute they are laughing and flirting with each other, and the next, Lexa is freaking out and running away. So in Clarke’s mind, it’s only a matter of time before they take three giant leaps backwards on all the progress that they’ve made so far.

 _“What’s on your mind, Clarke?”_ Lexa questions, her tone gentle as if she can tell that Clarke is on the cusp of freaking out.

 _“Nothing really.”_ Clarke mumbles, her gaze downcast into her lap.

 _“Yeah, you say that. But I can feel the nerves radiating off of you.”_ Lexa’s hand finds purchase on one of Clarke’s thighs, causing her to suck in a breath. Lexa almost moves away as she feels Clarke’s body tense under her touch, but her mind is changed for her when Clarke’s fingers grasp her wrist. _“You can talk to me, you know.”_

_“I just don’t really know where to start.”_

_“Um, maybe just tell me what you are freaking out about right now.”_

_“I just…why aren’t you freaking out right now?”_

Lexa’s perfectly sculpted eyebrows raise in confusion at Clarke’s words. _“What is it that I should be freaking out about?”_

_“I don’t know Lexa, how about the fact that I woke up in your bed wearing nothing but my bra and panties.”_

_“Clarke,”_ Lexa laughs softly, shaking her head from side to side, _“Nothing happened.”_

_“Well, I know that.”_

_“Then why are you freaking out about it?”_

_“I don’t know! Why aren’t you?”_

_“Because, cuddling you while we slept is probably the most innocent thing that happened between us last night. So, it’s not a big deal.”_

_“What…”_

By the way that Clarke’s face scrunches up at the brunette’s words, Lexa is now sure that Clarke doesn’t remember last night. At least not all of the night.

_“How much do you remember about the party?”_

_“Um. I remember going outside with Raven, Niylah and Ontari. We drank a whole bottle of tequila between the four of us. I’m pretty sure that I drank most of it. After that, things are kinda blurry.”_

_“So you don’t remember the body shot? Or the dancing? Or Ontari spilling beer on you? You know the reason that you were mostly naked in my bed.”_

_“Body shot, dancing? Having beer spilt on me?”_ Clarke shakes her head frantically. _“No, I don’t remember any of this.”_

_“Well, where shall I start?”_

_“Um, how about the freaking beginning?”_

_“Okay. Let’s see. I was in my room for a bit when Octavia drunkenly barged into my room. Lincoln came in after her and told me that you wanted to see me. So I came out of my room to see Niylah taking a body shot off of you.”_

_“Really?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“That’s awkward.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because she still has a thing for me. Even though I’ve told her that we are only going to be friends.”_

_“Right. After the body shot she was all over Ontari. So I think that you’re safe.”_

_“Good, that’s good.”_ Clarke lets out a loud sigh, her body sinking into the plush fabric of Lexa’s mattress. _“Go on.”_

_“Okay. While I was in my bedroom, I had a bit to drink. So I was feeling pretty buzzed when I came out into the kitchen.”_

_“Yeah, okay. I don’t know what that has to do with anything.”_

_“Well.”_ Lexa brings her free hand to rub awkwardly at the back of her neck. _“I’m not good at this Clarke”_

_“Good at what?”_

_“Just, give me a second.”_ Lexa closes her eyes and tucks her bottom lip between her teeth in concentration as she contemplates her next statement. After a moment of silence, she nods he head, seemingly coming to some sort of agreement in her head. Her eyes pop back open, meeting Clarke’s curious gaze. _“Okay. So when I saw Niylah’s lips graze yours as she was biting down on the lime, I felt jealous.”_

_“What? Why?”_

_“Because.”_

_“That’s not a reason, Lexa.”_

_“I know. And being jealous of her isn’t a logical feeling for me to have. You’ve told me that you are willing to wait until I am ready, and I understand that. I do. But that doesn’t stop my head from playing out these other scenarios.”_

_“Like what?”_

_“Like somebody else swooping in and snatching up your heart.”_

_“Lexa, that’s ridiculous.”_

_“It’s not though. It’s a completely logical thought.”_

Clarke lets out an exasperated sigh, pulling away from Lexa so that she can turn to face her. _“How many times do we have to have this conversation for you to understand?”_

_“I do understand.”_

_“I don’t really think that you do.”_

_“No, I really do. You’ve told me plenty of times that you are going to wait for me. But what you don’t understand is how amazing you are.”_

_“Please, I’m not even close to amazing.”_

_“Okay, yes you are. But we can argue about that later because we are way off track here. So I was jealous.”_

_“For no reason.”_

Lexa rolls her eyes at Clarke’s words. _“For no reason apparently. I drunkenly decided that I should let you take a body shot off of me.”_

Clarke leans in slightly, her blue eyes slipping down to glance at Lexa’s lips briefly before flitting back up to gaze into the green eyes that she has become addicted to. _“So, you only decided that the body shot was a good idea because you were drunk?”_

 _“Um.”_ Lexa’s eyes drift down Clarke’s face, zeroing in on the full pink lips that she wants nothing more than to feel pressed against her own. _“No?”_

 _“Lexie.”_ Clarke’s soft, husky chuckle breaks Lexa’s concentration, her eyes snapping back up to Clarke’s eyes. _“Focus.”_

_“What?”_

_“So, the body shot?”_

_“Yeah. So the body shot. I got it all set up. But instead of having you take the shot out of bellybutton like Niylah did to you, I put the shot glass…”_

Clarke chokes back a gasp as she is suddenly assaulted by previously forgotten memories from the night before.

Her mind replays everything from the party, starting where Lexa’s story left off. She remembers the salty taste of Lexa’s skin as Clarke’s tongue ran up her collarbone. The feeling of her face being pressed up against Lexa’s chest as her lips wrapped around the shot glass resting in her bra.

She can’t fight back the gasp that leaves her mouth as she remembers the feeling of Lexa’s lips moving hotly against her own. Lexa’s hand gripping her hair to keep their bodies pressed together. Clarke can feel her body start to tingle with arousal at the memory of Lexa’s shy but forceful tongue sliding into her mouth.

_“Clarke?”_

Clarke startles out of her memories as Lexa’s hand brushes her cheek.

_“Are you okay?”_

_“Yeah. Sorry. I just….I remember the body shots.”_

_“Oh, okay. So you remember….”_

_“The kiss?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Yup.”_

_“So?”_

_“So what?”_

_“Am I supposed to apologize for it?”_

_“No. God no. Why would I want you to apologize for kissing me?”_

_“Because I kind of attacked your face.”_

_“Well. I wasn’t exactly complaining, now was I? If I remember correctly, I kissed you back.”_

_“Yeah, but…”_

_“No. Lexa, no more excuses. It happened. I am not complaining. I liked it. Okay?”_

_“But you weren’t of sound mind.”_

_“Please. I was drunk. So were you. Or you were at least pretty buzzed. And maybe you only kissed me because you were jealous of Niylah. But it happened. It happened and I liked the fact that it happened and you liked it too.”_

_“Yeah, I did.”_

_“And maybe I should be the one to apologize.”_

_“For what?”_

_“For my roaming hands that lifted you up and pressed you into the counter.”_

_“Oh, no need to complain about that.”_

_“No? Maybe I should tell you that I’m sorry for trying to hump your leg while we were dancing.”_

_“So you remember that?”_

_“I didn’t until about two seconds ago. Lexa, I am so…”_

_“Nope. If I can’t apologize for kissing you, you cannot apologize for what happened during our dance.”_

_“But…”_

_“No. I slipped my leg in-between yours. And I didn’t complain at all while it was happening.”_

_“Okay”_ Clarke lets out a soft laugh, shaking her head at the situation. _“What are we going to do, Lex?”_

_“About what?”_

_“About us.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“Look at us Lexa. Our friends are right. We are terrible at being friends. I don’t know if you feel it, but the sexual tension between us is insane. I feel like I’m going crazy when I’m around you. And I’m trying to be patient, but I don’t know how much longer I am going to last before I lose my mind. Because I really, really….”_

_“Go out with me.”_

_“What?”_

_“Go out on a date with me.”_

_“What?”_

Lexa laughs, bringing her hand up to cup Clarke’s cheek. _“Clarke. Will you go out on a date with me?”_

_“No.”_

_“No?”_ Lexa’s smile falls, her hand dropping from Clarke’s cheek back into her lap.

_“Um, what? What did you ask me again?”_

_“Seriously?”_

_“Sorry. I am pretty sure that I have died and gone to heaven.”_

_“You’re such a dork.”_

_“Yeah, but you totally just asked this dork out on a date.”_

_“To which she replied with a resounding no. So I guess that I will just have to find somebody else to court.”_

_“LEXA! Don’t you dare! Of course I would love to go on a date with you. FUCKING FINALLY!”_

Clarke lunges towards Lexa, crashing their bodies together. The force of Clarke’s body colliding with Lexa’s causes her lips gaze the brunette’s cheek, eliciting a gasp from Lexa. As they pull apart, Clarke’s eyes betray her again as they fall to rest on Lexa’s lips. This time she isn’t alone in her admiration of the other girl’s lips, as Lexa’s eyes are glued to hers. Clarke licks at her suddenly dry lips, her face subconsciously moving close to Lexa’s. Before her mind has time to process what exactly is happening, she feels Lexa’s lips insistently pressing against her own. Lexa hums against Clarke’s lips as her hand slips through blonde locks, pulling Clarke impossibly closer to her.

The forcefulness in which Lexa is kissing her reminds her much of their kiss last night. It’s similar, but at the same time, so different. This is now the third time that she has kissed Lexa, and she’s pretty sure that this time is the best. Granted, this is the first time that they have been sober during a kiss, but it rivals every single physical touch that has been shared between them.

Clarke tilts her head to deepen the kiss, groaning as Lexa’s tongue slides into mouth. Her eyelids flutter closed as she feels Lexa’s tongue move against hers.

She’s not quite sure how it happens, but before she knows it, her shoulders are being pressed into plush mattress. Lexa manages to get her down onto the bed and straddle her without breaking their kiss. Clarke lets out a groan into Lexa’s mouth as the brunette’s welcome weight settles on her hips.

It’s not long before Lexa breaks the kiss, only to press her lips softly down Clarke’s jaw. She increases the pressure of her kisses when she reaches Clarke’s neck, taking the skin in-between her teeth. Clarke hisses in pleasure as Lexa bites down on her pulse point. Her hands come up to rest on Lexa’s hips. She can’t help but slip her hands underneath Lexa’s tank top, scratching bluntly at the soft skin.

Lexa lets out a groan against Clarke’s neck as the blonde scratches softly at her hips. She’s pretty positive that she is going to leave a mark on Clarke’s neck, but she can’t bring herself to care as she bites down on the wildly fluttering pulse again.

Clarke’s mind is completely clouded over with lust right now. All she is able to focus on is how amazing Lexa’s mouth feels against her neck. It really makes her wonder how good Lexa could make her feel if she turned her attention elsewhere. That thought alone makes her let out an obscene moan as she lifts her body up to cant her hips against Lexa’s. The force in which Lexa bites down on her neck is sure to leave a hickey, but Clarke really doesn’t care right now.

She’s fairly certain that she has ruined yet another pair of her panties because of Lexa, and her borrowed shorts probably aren’t fairing much better. Clarke knows that they should probably stop before they go further than they are ready for right now, but the way that Lexa is feasting on her neck is making her thoughts fuzzy.

She knows that her fingertips are digging tightly into Lexa’s skin, and they are probably bordering on being painful. Each time Clarke tightens her grip on the brunette’s slim hips, Lexa’s ministrations increase in pressure, and she’ll be damned if she is going to be the one to stop them.

Lexa’s mind is completely focused on the blonde that is squirming beneath her. She can’t even begin to process any rational thought right now. She is a slave to her primal urges, wanting nothing more than to claim and mark Clarke as her property.

She feels Clarke’s hips rise up in search of friction and she can’t stop herself from grinding her own hips down. She can feel the heat radiating off of the blonde’s center and it makes her moan into Clarke’s neck. She’s pretty sure that Clarke can feel how soaked she is underneath her pajama shorts, if the keening mewl is anything to go by.

Lexa ‘s concentration is so focused on her assault of Clarke’s neck that she doesn’t immediately notice her tank top being pulled up her body. She snaps out of her daze with a loud groan when she feels Clarke’s calloused fingers tentatively brush the underside of her breasts.

Lexa pulls her mouth away from Clarke’s neck as the blonde’s hands begin to confidently pull up her tank top. The smirk that Clarke gives her makes her heart skip a beat and she can’t stop herself from pressing her lips against the blonde’s. Clarke groans into her mouth as she immediately deepens the kiss. Clarke’s fingertips ghost around the sides of Lexa’s chest, leaving goosebumps in their wake. She doesn’t increase the pressure of her ministrations nor does she increase her speed.

Clarke’s featherlike touches are bringing Lexa to the brink of insanity. She can’t stop the groans and soft pants that are flowing from her mouth and into Clarke’s. But as much as she is enjoying the teasing, she is pretty sure that she is about to lose her mind. She wants. No she needs Clarke to increase the pressure of her touches because she is going crazy with want right now. Her hips cant downwards, pressing into Clarke’s in search of some sort of friction. Clarke moans into Lexa’s mouth, sending a fresh wave of arousal through her body.

Lexa’s already overwhelming desire increases tenfold as Clarke’s hands finally move to where Lexa wants them. She rips her mouth away from Clarke’s with a wanton moan as the blonde’s thumbs brush across her over-sensitized nipples.

 _“Clarke.”_ Lexa rasps, voice heavily laden with her now painfully obvious arousal.

 _“Hmm,”_ is Clarke’s only response as her fingers once again rub against hardened peaks.

_“Clarke, we need to stop.”_

_“Don’t wanna.”_ Clarke’s hands grip Lexa’s ample chest, rolling and pinching her stiff nipples between her fingers.

 _“Seriously, Clarke. You’re driving me crazy.”_ Lexa groans out as she leans down to bury her face into the crook of Clarke’s neck. This slight change of position traps Clarke’s hands against Lexa’s chest, not that either woman will complain about it. At all.

_“Oh I know. This is how I feel whenever I am around you. I’m surprised that I haven’t spontaneously combusted yet.”_

Clarke nudges Lexa’s cheek with her own, causing her to tilt her head to the side. The movement leaves Lexa’s neck exposed, and Clarke doesn’t think twice before she presses her lips against Lexa’s pulse point. Clarke slips her thigh in-between Lexa’s legs, letting out a groan as she feels Lexa grind down in search of friction. Clarke’s mouth moves quickly against Lexa’s neck, peppering kisses all over the soft skin. When Clarke bites down on the wildly thudding pulse, Lexa’s hips roll down against Clarke’s thigh again. She can’t fight back the loud moan that escapes her lips as Clarke’s hands tighten their grip on her chest. The sensation of Clarke’s calloused (from years of sketching and painting, Lexa assumes) fingers as they fondle her chest mixed with the soft pressing of the blonde’s thigh against her center is making her head swim. The foggy cloud of arousal surrounding her mind is becoming too much to handle, and she can feel her body teetering close to the precipice of an orgasm. She knows that she needs to stop this, otherwise she is about to be very embarrassed in front of Clarke and there is no way that she can allow that to happen. Clarke’s mouth against her neck and hands on her chest are trying like hell to change her mind. Her lust clouded brain barely registers the loud sound of her bedroom door hitting the wall as somebody barges in.

_“Hey!!! Are you guys almost done in here? I need to use the bathroom.”_

Clarke pulls back from Lexa’s neck with a gasp, hands dropping to grip her naked hips. Two sets of eyes turn their attention to the doorway, where a very disheveled brunette is leaning heavily against the wooden doorframe. Octavia is standing in Lexa’s doorway, looking worse for wear. Her hair is sticking up in various places; body slumped over is what could be mistaken for pain. She looks at the two girls with what Clarke can easily identify as her ‘still drunk the next morning’ face.

_“O?”_

Octavia’s glassy eyes meet Clarke’s panicked ones. By the way that Octavia is looking at her, Clarke can tell that she is still pretty wasted, and likely to not remember what she is currently looking at.

Not that Clarke would normally mind being caught in such a precarious position. Hell, she’s been caught on many different occasions by her best friend. But for some reason, she is not okay with Lexa being subjected to the ridicule that her best friends can dish out.

_“You two have been in here forever. I am about to piss my pants.”_

_“What are you talking about, Octavia?”_

_“Well, Lexa, I am talking about you and Clarke taking up the only bathroom in this fucking apartment. There are other people here right now that probably have to pee.”_

_“This isn’t the bathroom, O.”_

_“Well, where the fuck is it then?”_

_“Next door on your right.”_

_“Thanks…I just gotta…”_

Clarke should’ve seen it coming. She’s been friends with Octavia for going on seventeen years now. They’ve been through many bouts of having colds, or binge eating too much candy during Halloween. In the past five years, they’ve added nights of drinking to that mix. So really, Clarke is well versed in all things Octavia Blake. Maybe it’s the horrible hangover the she herself is suffering from. Or maybe the heavy cloud of lust that is still at the forefront of her mind. Maybe if she was of sound mind at this current moment, she would’ve caught it.

When Lincoln asks her later, she’ll blame it on the hangover. But she knows the truth. The apocalypse could happen right now, zombies taking over the world, and she couldn’t care less. Aside from Octavia’s very unwelcome intrusion right now, Clarke is right where she wants to be. With Lexa’s body resting on top of her, soft puffs of air hitting her neck as she breathes while still nuzzling Clarke’s skin. Every single brush of Lexa’s nose against her neck sends shivers coursing through Clarke’s body. She’s still keyed up; her body aching from the amount of need that she is feeling. So that’s the real reason why she missed all of the signs before her.

Neither girl has time to react as Octavia’s drunken scowl turns into a look of pain as she slumps over and vomits onto Lexa’s bedroom floor. Both Clarke and Lexa waste no time jumping from the bed and run to Octavia’s side, Lexa grabbing her bedside trash can on the way. Clarke’s hands immediately find purchase in Octavia’s tangled locks, pulling her wayward strands out of her best friend’s face. Lexa holds the trash can under Octavia’s head in a futile attempt to keep any more vomit from getting onto her bedroom floor. After a few moments, Octavia has gathered herself enough to hold the waste bin so that Lexa can go search for Lincoln.

 _“Linc!!!”_ Lexa yells as she makes her way into the living room.

The man in question is sprawled out on her couch, snoring softly in his slumber. There are a few other bodies littering her floor, most of them Clarke, Raven and Octavia’s friends. Lexa leans over the couch so that she can jostle Lincoln’s shoulder. It takes a few pushes before he begins to stir, a pained grunt leaving his lips as he fights off sleep.

 _“Lex?”_ Lincoln questions, his eyes half lidded, voice raspy from slumber.

_“Hey.”_

_“What’s up?”_

_“Um, well. Can you come with me?”_

_“Yeah. Is everything okay?”_

_“Well. I mean, yeah. It’s just; Octavia is throwing up in my bedroom.”_

_“Shit.”_

_“Yeah. So if you don’t mind helping Clarke and I get her to the bathroom or something.”_

_“Yeah, let’s go get her.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

After forcing a still inebriated Octavia into the shower to clean up, the three settle her into Lexa’s bed to sleep off what is bound to be a killer hangover. Lexa and Lincoln decide to go for a run to try and sweat off their hangovers. Clarke declines their invitation, opting to take a very cold shower to try and calm her still overheated body down from her and Lexa’s earlier activities. The pair changes into proper workout gear, grabbing Fish on their way out of the apartment.

The cold shower provides Clarke some relief. Well, maybe it wasn’t so much the cold shower as it was her wandering hands that help provide some much needed relief.  As weirded out as she is to be masturbating in the object of her affection’s shower, she is powerless to stop herself. She can’t stop her hands from drifting down her water slicked body as her mind replays the last couple of hours. The sight of Lexa’s body grinding against hers, wanton moans leaving the brunette’s lips is enough to send her over the edge quickly.

With her body sated at the moment, Clarke pulls on a borrowed pair of leggings and a long sleeved blue shirt. Raven and Anya have finally made an appearance, curling up together on the couch. Anya’s eyes are closed in pure contentment; Raven’s fingers running through her blonde locks as she absentmindedly channel surfs. Clarke hooks her arm under Anya’s ankles, sitting down next to her before resting her legs in her lap.

_“My head is killing me.”_

_“Shh…this is a quiet place. If you want to be out here, you have to be quiet.”_ Anya whispers at Clarke, her eyes still closed. Clarke’s hands find purchase on her friend’s feet. She digs her fingertips into Anya’s feet, massaging the knots out of her joints. Anya lets out a soft groan at her friend’s ministrations before cracking one eye open to look at Clarke. She gives Clarke her best one eyed glare before closing her eye again. _“Just because you’ve found my weakness, doesn’t mean that you get to be loud.”_

_“If you’re mean to me, I won’t feed you.”_

_“But I love you Clarke.”_

_“Yeah, yeah. What do you want to eat, my secret lover?”_

_“If you’re banging my girlfriend Princess, I think that I should get to choose what you make.”_

_“Did you just sell my body for the right to pick what Clarke makes for breakfast?”_ Anya opens her eyes to look at her girlfriend, jutting her bottom lip out in her best pout.

Raven leans down to press a kiss to her girlfriend’s pouty lips. _“I love you,”_ she mumbles against Anya’s mouth.

 _“You guys are disgusting.”_ Clarke grumbles as she gets to her feet.

_“Love you too Princess! I want French toast. And bacon.”_

_“I’ll think about it.”_

_“PLEASE!”_

_“Shh, babe. No yelling.”_

_“Aww, does your head hurt?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Well, maybe next time you shouldn’t drink so much.”_

_“I hate you.”_

_“No, you don’t. You love me.”_

_“Yeah, it’s a chore, really.”_

_“Shof op Onya.”_

_“Ai hod yu in, Reivon.”_

_“I love you too.”_

Raven presses another kiss to Anya’s lips before both girls’ turn their attention back to the television. Before too long, Clarke comes back into the living room holding two heaping plates of food. She sets the plates on the table in front of Raven and Anya and walks back into the kitchen. She comes back out holding two coffee cups, a bottle of water and another plate. Raven and Anya are already ravenously eating their breakfast.

_“Marry me, Clarke Griffin.”_

_“Sorry Rae, my heart belongs to another.”_ Clarke quips as she sets the cups down. _“I’m going to go wake up the beast now.”_

_“Oh. Good luck. Is she still drunk?”_

_“She was an hour ago when she threw up in Lexa’s room.”_

_“Gross, dude. Hopefully she doesn’t murder you for waking her up.”_

_“Yeah, here’s hoping.”_

Clarke makes her way out of the living room with a sigh. Anya turns to Raven, her eyes wide in surprise. If Raven wasn’t so shocked herself, she might laugh at the syrup that is smeared across Anya’s chin.

_“What did she just say?”_

_“Um, I mean. I’m hungover, but I think that she just said that her heart belongs to another.”_

_“Well, no shit. I have ears, I heard her. Who do you think she’s talking about?”_

_“Please tell me that you’re fucking joking Ahn.”_

_“What?”_

_“Dude, seriously. She’s talking about Lexa, you idiot.”_

_“You think so?”_

_“Okay, I’m going to pretend that you aren’t being a dumbass right now. We will just blame it on the hangover. Because you’d have to be fucking dead to not tell that those two are crazy about each other.”_

Clarke takes a deep breath to muster up some courage as she makes her way down the hall. Stopping at the closed bedroom door, she runs her free hand through her curly blonde locks before pushing the bedroom door open.

She knows that she is probably safe considering that she has food to offer her best friend, but she can’t stop her heart from hammering painfully in her chest. Octavia was scary enough when she was angry; add a night of drinking and her best friend was downright terrifying.

Octavia looks innocent enough in her slumber, curled up in Lexa’s bed. Her face is peaceful, soft snores escaping her lips as she sleeps. But Clarke knows that this is all a façade. She’s treading dangerous waters right now as she moves to sit down on the bed next to her best friend. She puts the plate and water on the bedside table before stretching out on the bed next to Octavia. She brings her arm to rest around Octavia’s waist and curls her body around her best friend’s.

 _“O,”_ Clarke whispers, rubbing her hand softly across Octavia’s stomach. _“Babe, wake up.”_

_“Mmm, fuck off.”_

_“O, you need to get some water into you. And I brought you some food.”_

_“Idonwanna,”_ Octavia mumbles into Lexa’s pillow.

_“But I made French toast and bacon.”_

_“Mmmkay. Five more minutes.”_

_“Okay.”_ Clarke goes to sit up on the bed, but Octavia’s hand grips her wrist to keep her in place.

_“Stay with me.”_

_“But…”_

_“Please Clarke.”_

_“Fine,”_ Clarke sighs as she nuzzles closer to her best friend. It only takes a few minutes for her to feel her body start to relax, Octavia’s soft breaths lulling her back to sleep.

**~*~*~*~*~***

There’s just something about running after a night of drinking that Lexa loves. Not that she drinks very often, she really doesn’t. It’s a very rare occasion when she actually partakes in the consumption of alcohol, especially since Costia died, and especially not to the point of inebriation. Last night was the first time that she has actually been wasted since before the accident.

Running after a night of heavy drinking is exhilarating for Lexa. She feels like sweating from the physical exertion staves away any trace of hangover.

Lincoln on the other hand, looks like he is about to keel over. Or vomit. Or maybe both. He is sweating profusely, his skin a sickly shade of green. They’ve already had to stop three times so that he can collect himself before continuing. On this last stop, Fish has been whining and pulling on his leash, eager to continue their run. Lexa shushes the tiny puppy before turning her attention back to the gasping man bent over next to her.

_“We can go back if you need to.”_

_“No.”_ Lincoln is breathless, gasping as he attempts to suck in mouthfuls of air. _“I need to do this. It’s helping.”_

_“Alright, if you say so. But if you die on me, Octavia is going to be pissed at me for the rest of our lives.”_

_“I promise that I won’t die.”_

_“Okay.”_

The pair continues their run through the park next to Grounder’s. When Lexa is sure that Lincoln can’t take any more cardio in his hungover state, she drags him into the café. She hoists Fish up into her arms as Lincoln opens the door for her. The bell dings as they walk in, causing the barista to look up and greet them with a smile. Lexa remembers her as the girl that covered for Clarke when they went out for breakfast; she thinks that her name is Harper. Indra is also behind the counter, doing something at one of the espresso machines. Lexa and Lincoln walk up to the counter. Lexa smiles at Harper and clearing her throat before speaking.

_“Good morning Harper. Indra.”_

_“Good morning Lexa. Lincoln.”_ Indra acknowledges the pair before turning her attention back to her task at hand.

 _“What can I get for you guys today?”_ Harper asks cheerily. Lincoln grunts his order at the girl, asking her for a large cup of coffee with two shots of espresso added. Lexa orders a large caramel macchiato with two extra shots. Harper repeats the order back to the pair before reading their total.

_“They don’t have to pay today. They look like they are in dire need of the caffeine.”_

_“Okay. I’ll have the drinks right out for you guys.”_

_“Thank you Harper. Thanks Indra.”_

Indra gives Lexa a small smile before turning her attention back to the espresso machine. Lexa and Lincoln stand at the counter until Harper hands over two hot cups. They grab their cups and thank her before walking outside to their usual table. Lexa sets Fish down underneath her chair, looping the leash around her wrist to keep him nearby.

Lincoln eyes Lexa suspiciously as she takes a long drink of her coffee. Over the past few months, he’s been able to get a good read on Lexa. He knows that she’s extremely guarded, and that it’s hard for her to open up to people. She doesn’t like to let down the walls that are closed around her heart, for fear of seeming weak. She hasn’t opened up to him completely about the past that haunts her, but he knows bits and pieces from his girlfriend.

He can still see the hurt in her eyes when they do their workouts. She smiles and jokes around with him, but the pain is still evident.

The past couple of weeks have brought about a change in Lexa. When she smiles, it’s without any trace of sadness. There is an air around her, one that is more open.

So today, as they are sitting across from each other, he knows that something happened between her and Clarke. Even in his hungover state, he knows that whatever happened was something huge. By the look on her face, he knows that Lexa wants to talk about it. But he knows that she won’t bring it up herself. So with a deep breath, he starts what is bound to be a long conversation.

_“So…”_

_“So?”_

_“Did you enjoy the party last night?”_

_“Yeah, it was fun. Did you?”_

_“I had a good time. Not as good as you did though.”_

Lexa’s eyes narrow at Lincoln’s cryptic statement. _“What is that supposed to mean?”_

_“Well, it means that you obviously had a great time.”_

_“Why is it obvious?”_

Lincoln chuckles at the clipped tone of Lexa’s voice, taking a sip of his coffee before he continues.

_“It’s obvious for a lot of different reasons, Lex.”_

_After another sip of her drink, she lets out a sigh of annoyance._

_“Lincoln, I know that it doesn’t seem like it, but I am way too hungover for you to be so damn cryptic. Answer the freaking question, please.”_

_“Okay. Let’s see. Should we talk about the body shots? Or the provocative grinding slash dance session? Or we could talk about the newest development in Clarke and Lexa’s terrible at being friend’s friendship?”_

_“Newest development?”_

Lincoln subtly taps his finger on his neck. _“Well, I know that mark on your neck isn’t from Clarke’s underground fight club. Unless of course, that is your nickname for her mouth.”_

Lexa eyes widen in horror, her free hand clapping over the spot on her neck that Lincoln gestured to. She lets out a pained yelp as she smacks the sensitive skin.

_“Lincoln!”_

_“Come on Lex, that was funny.”_

_“Was not.”_

_“It was. So when did she put that mark on you?”_

_“This morning,”_ Lexa mumbles against the plastic lid of her coffee cup.

_“Did you guys?”_

_“No.”_

_“I sense a but in that answer.”_

_“There’s not one.”_

_“Look. I can tell that you want to talk about it. So just spit it out.”_

_“Okay. So you obviously saw the body shots and the dancing.”_

_“Yes. Lexa, just tell me about this morning. You don’t have to go into specifics about it.”_

_“So I woke up this morning to see Clarke pulling on some of my clothes. She was trying to sneak out of my room without waking me up.”_

_“Why was she taking your clothes? Was she naked?”_

Lexa can feel her face heating up in a blush as her mind goes back to this morning’s events. She can’t stop herself from recalling the sight of Clarke as she pulled on a pair of her leggings and a tank top. And really, she feels kind of like a perv for her ogling of Clarke as she got dressed. But she couldn’t help herself.

Thinking about Clarke changing only serves to bring her already sexually frustrated mind back to their not so innocent make out session. She’s fairly certain that if Octavia hadn’t drunkenly stumbled into her bedroom, she and Clarke would’ve slept together. She is extremely thankful for the interruption from Clarke’s best friend. It’s not that Lexa doesn’t want to sleep with Clarke, because she most definitely does. She just wants to do things right by the blonde. She can feel herself falling hard for Clarke. And as scared as she is to open up her heart to the possibility of more pain, she can’t fight it anymore. She wants Clarke. All of her.

_“Lex?”_

_“Hmm?”_

_“You okay there?”_

_“Yeah, I’m fine.”_

_“You sure? You kinda spaced out.”_

_“I’m positive.”_

_“You didn’t answer my question.”_

_“What was it?”_

_“Why was Clarke borrowing clothes from you? Was she naked?”_

_“No, she wasn’t. Last night Ontari spilt a beer on her while we were dancing. I took her into my room to get her a change of clothes. But she was wasted. She passed out on my bed while I was getting clothes for her to change into. I managed to get her beer soaked clothes off, but I couldn’t get her to wake up enough to put on anything else. So instead, I laid down with her and passed out.”_

_“That’s all that happened?”_

_“Yeah, until this morning.”_

_“What happened this morning? After Clarke’s failed attempt at sneaking out.”_

_“Well, I got her to sit down on my bed. She was freaking out because she thought that we had sex, seeing as she woke up in nothing but her bra and underwear.”_

_“That’s a fair assumption.”_

_“So after she calmed down about the waking up mostly nude thing, we talked about last night. I told her some things that I’ve yet to share with her. Mostly about me being jealous of Niylah and that being part of the reason why I kissed her after the body shot. Anyway, that bit isn’t important. At the end of the conversation, I asked her out on a date.”_

_“WHAT???”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“FINALLY!”_

_“What’s that supposed to mean?”_

_“Nothing really. O and I just kind of figured that you guys would never get your shit together.”_

_“Really, Lincoln?”_

_“Yeah. I’m sorry Lex. But you guys have been dancing around each other for a while now. And it’s painfully obvious to everyone that you guys are crazy about each other.”_

_“Hodnes laik kwelnes, Linkon. Yu get in disha.”_

_“Dula op yu wich in bilaik, Heda? Ai wich in bilaik hodess laik uf, nou kwelnes.”_

_“Ai fir raun Linkon.”_ Lexa’s voice is small, her eyes filled with fear.

_“Kiken raun bilaik mou kom jos kiken thru, Heda.”_

_“Ait. Ai hon in yu.”_ Lexa’s gaze drops to the table. She sets her drink down and begins to fiddle with the lid as she avoids Lincoln’s eyes.

 _“Chek ai au, Leksa. Ro ai ridiyo op.”_ Lexa reluctantly lifts her gaze up from the table, meeting Lincoln’s sympathetic gaze. _“Dula op yu hod in Klark?”_

_“Ai dula op nou get in.”_

_“I can see it in your eyes, you know. When you talk about her, or think about her.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“It’s nothing to be afraid of. She looks at you the same way.”_

_“It’s not like that. We barely know each other.”_

_“Love is funny that way. Sometimes it just happens.”_

_“I can’t love anybody. Not again.”_

_“I don’t think that you have much of a choice. But, I am really glad that you are finally giving Clarke a chance. You both deserve it.”_

_“Thanks, Linc.”_

_“Don’t get all sappy on me, Heda.”_

_“Shof op.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Fuck. Lincoln is never going to let me hear the end of this.”_

_“What do you mean?”_ Clarke’s hand freezes inches from her mouth, a forkful of French toast hanging in the air.

 _“Because he was right,”_ Octavia replies through a mouthful of her now cold breakfast.

 _“About what?”_ Clarke shoves the fork into her mouth, chewing the cold, syrup soaked goodness before swallowing it.

_“About Lexa being the one to ask you out.”_

_“I, what?”_

_“Lincoln and I were betting on whether Lexa would finally woman up and ask you out. Or if you would snap and fuck her brains out at the party.”_

_“Well, I mean, you were pretty close to winning too.”_

_“WHAT?! Clarke Jane Griffin! Did you and Lexa have sex?”_

_“O. Please, shut the fuck up. I don’t need Raven or Anya to barge in here. And no, we didn’t have sex.”_

_“Those two are probably banging on the couch by now. So I don’t think that you have to worry about them hearing this conversation.”_

_“You never know with Raven.”_

_“Okay, I get it. But seriously, if you guys didn’t have sex, how did I come close to winning the bet?”_

_“Well, okay. If I tell you, you cannot say anything to Raven or Anya. I don’t want them to say anything to Lexa.”_

_“I won’t.”_ The look that Clarke gives Octavia makes it clear that she doesn’t trust her statement. Octavia scoffs at her best friend. _“I swear Clarke.”_

_“Okay. So she asked me out. And at first I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.  She had to repeat her question twice before I could finally comprehend what she was saying. And then I said no.”_

_“What? Are you fucking mental?”_

_“Wait. I’m not finished. So after I said no, it finally dawned on me what she was asking. And of course I said yes. I got super excited and hugged her. As I pulled myself out of her arms, she lunged forward and kissed me.”_

_“Of course she did. You guys are the world’s worst friends.”_

_“We are not. You and I have kissed before.”_

_“Not like you’ve kissed Lexa. And we were thirteen.”_

_“So? It still happened.”_

_“Shut up, dork.”_

_“You love me.”_

_“Yes, I do. Now finish your story. I’m dying to know about how George gained a sibling.”_

_“Oh dammit. Did she give me another hickey?”_

_“I would be lying if I said no.”_

_“Fucking hell.”_

_“Okay, finish the damn story.”_

_“Jeez. Impatient much?”_ Clarke pauses to take another bite of her French toast. They are so cold now that they are pretty disgusting, but she couldn’t really care less right now. The painful throbbing of her head isn’t as debilitating as it was this morning, but she still doesn’t feel like getting up to make a fresh plate. Judging by the way Octavia is currently shoveling the soggy bread into her mouth, she doesn’t care either. _“So she kissed me. And this time it was different. I mean, we’ve kissed before. But both other times we were drunk. So this was the first sober kiss that we’ve had. And it was amazing O.”_

_“Awww….my little Clarkey has gone and fell in love._

_“Shut up. I’m not in love with her.”_

_“I know that you’re lying. Your ears turn red when you lie.”_

_“Ugh. I hate that you can read me so well.”_

_“We’ve been friends since we were five. Sometimes I think that I know you better than I know myself.”_

_“Yeah, same here.”_ Clarke sets her mostly empty plate down on the bedside table before flopping down on the bed with a loud sigh. _“What am I going to do, O?”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“It’s way too soon for love to even be mentioned in this conversation.”_

_“Oh babe. It is never too soon to fall in love.”_

_“I barely know her.”_

_“The heart wants what the heart wants Princess.”_

_“Ugh.”_

_“Well, I am assuming that you had a good time._

_“Of course I did. I got to make out with an amazing girl this morning.”_ Clarke rubs her fingers absentmindedly against her lips. She can still feel the insistent press of Lexa’s lips against her own. She begins to feel the telltale signs of arousal thrumming deep in her core as her mind drifts back to the feeling of Lexa’s weight pinning her hips to the bed.

_“Clarke?”_

_“Hmmm?”_ Clarke manages to reply, even though her mind is a million miles away right now. All she can think about is Lexa. The way that Lexa’s body felt against her own. The way that Lexa’s hips moved against hers. The wanton little moans that Lexa let out when Clarke would grind against her just right.

_“Clarke!”_

_“What?”_

_“You look like you’re about to attack me. And I love you, I really do. But I don’t swing that way.”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“Well, it’s not my fault that you look like you want to ravish me. Are you thinking about Lexa?”_

_“Maybe.”_

_“I don’t think that there is any maybe about it. Whenever you think about her you get this glazed over look in your eyes.”_

_“I do not!”_

_“You totally do. It’s okay to admit it Clarke. I get it. She’s like crazy hot.”_

_“She is.”_

_“And now you don’t have to pine over her anymore because she’s finally got her head out of her ass.”_

_“Let’s hope so.”_

_“Well considering that you guys almost fucked in this bedroom a few hours ago, I’d say that you don’t have anything to worry about.”_

_“We didn’t have sex.”_

_“Yeah, only because I twat blocked you by barging into the room.”_

_“What are you talking about?”_

_“Oh please Clarke. I was still kinda drunk earlier, but I remember what I saw.”_

_“You what?!”_

_“I walked into the bedroom on accident, yeah. But I did not expect to walk in on you two in such a precarious position. I didn’t want to freak Lexa out so I thought that if I pretended like I was blackout drunk, she would be okay.”_

_“So you saw…”_

_“Everything.”_

_“Oh god. Okay, I’m going to go drown myself in the tub now.”_

_“No, Clarke. Seriously, it’s fine.”_

_“It’s not fine. Wait a minute, why didn’t you just leave the room?”_

_“Because. I know how hard you’ve worked to get Lexa to give you a shot. And I don’t know, I felt like if you guys just randomly hooked up you’d regret it.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“I know that you’re scared Clarke. You’re falling in love with her, and it’s happening really quickly. I just don’t want you to rush anything with her.”_

_“Thanks I guess. Although Princess Peach doesn’t share the sentiment.”_

_“Well, I’m not sorry.”_

_“You’re a dick O.”_

_“You love it.”_

_“Ugh. I’m too hungover to deal with this.”_

Both girls jump as a loud bang hits Lexa’s bedroom door. Less than a minute later, Raven barges into the room with a huge grin on her face.

_“What’s up bitches?”_

_“Rae, lower your voice. This is our quiet place.”_

_“Well, you guys need to buck up and come join the land of the living. Plus Lexa and Lincoln are back from their run.”_

_“Yass. It’s been real Princess. But I am going to take Lincoln home so that I can ravish him. Thanks for the soggy French toast.”_ Octavia gets out of Lexa’s bed with a grunt, grabbing the two plates off of the bedside table as she makes her way to the door.

_“It wouldn’t’ve been soggy if your lazy ass had gotten up the first time!”_

_“The extra nap was worth it babe!”_

_“You’re right.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Okay, are you ready for me to come out?”_

I’m more than ready for a lot of things, is the first thing that pops into Clarke’s mind. If she didn’t have such an awesome verbal filter, she probably would’ve blurted that statement out loud.

The amount of excitement coursing through her veins as she thinks about seeing Lexa in a suit is almost ridiculous. She is almost shaking with nervous energy as she stands outside of the dressing room.

The sight of Lexa walking out garners two reactions from Clarke. The first being an intake of breath so loud that she is positive that people on the other side of the store can hear her. The second reaction is only obvious to her. The jolt of arousal that hits her makes her sway on her feet. She feels almost dizzy with lust as she takes in the sight before her. Lexa is dressed to the nines in a slate gray fitted tuxedo. The form fitting slacks and long sleeved white shirt accentuate the brunette’s toned body. She has the sleeves rolled up to her elbows, with the jacket slung over her left shoulder. Clarke is pretty sure that she would be drooling right now, if all of the moisture in her body wasn’t focused elsewhere.

_“Well?”_

_“Fuck.”_

The slightly husky chuckle that comes out of Lexa’s mouth makes Clarke’s knees buckle. She juts her hip out to rest against the wall so that she doesn’t topple to the floor.

_“I guess that means that I look good then?”_

Clarke’s eyes scan over Lexa’s body, committing every single curve to her memory. She tries really hard not to be a pervert, but she can’t help but stop to ogle Lexa’s chest. The bra that she is wearing can definitely be seen through the shirt. Not that she is complaining about that, at all.

_“I mean. Holy shit Lex.”_

_“What?”_

_“You look fucking amazing.”_

_“You think?”_

_“Oh, I am absolutely positive.”_

_“Awesome. I’m glad that you think so.”_

_“I just have one question for you.”_

_“Oh yeah, what’s that?”_

_“Is it time for our date yet?”_

Lexa clicks her tongue against her teeth and Clarke can’t help but move her gaze to the brunette’s mouth. She hasn’t been able to think of anything but Lexa’s mouth since their impromptu make-out/not so dry hump session two days ago. They haven’t really talked about it since it happened, but both girls can feel the tension.

_“Soon, my dear.”_

_“Okay. I’m going to need you to go change back into your clothes, immediately.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because I am having a really hard time not jumping your bones while you’re wearing it. So unless you want to get arrested for indecent exposure, I suggest you change.”_

_“Okay, okay.”_ The smirk that graces Lexa’s face tells Clarke that she should walk away, and quickly. But being the glutton for punishment that she seems to be, she doesn’t. It takes her a moment register what is happening, and when she does, it’s too late to turn away. Lexa hangs the suit jacket on the corner of her dressing room door. When she turns back to Clarke, her hands are resting on the buttons of the crisp white shirt. _“If you want me to change, I’ll change.”_ Her fingers don’t fumble as she undoes the top two buttons.

_“Um…”_

_“What’s the matter, Clarke? You wanted me to change.”_

_“Not out here.”_

_“Why not? What’s the big deal? Nobody else is in here besides us and the sales person.”_ Lexa smiles innocently at Clarke as she pops open the third button, revealing the lacy black bra that she has on underneath. She knows that she is playing a dangerous game, but she feels power hungry at the way she is affecting Clarke. The blonde’s hands are clenched into fists at her sides, her jaw taut with tension. Darkened blue eyes are raking over her form as she slowly unclasps another button. Clarke traps her bottom lip between her teeth, biting down on the plump flesh. _“Is something wrong, Clarke?”_

_“I just, um. I’m what?”_

_“Are you okay?”_

_“Fine. I’m fine. I just have to go get some water. I’m like super thirsty.”_

Clarke walks away without saying another word, leaving the store in a rush. Lexa stands in faux confusion at the dressing room door, her eyes following the blonde until she is out of sight. With a chuckle, Lexa goes back into the dressing room to change.

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Fuck.”_

Clarke slumps back against the wall, willing her thudding heart to calm down. She can feel the heat thrumming in her veins, making her skin feel too hot. With shaking hands, Clarke pulls her phone out of her jeans. She fumbles as she types in the passcode to unlock the device, finally managing to type it in correctly on the fourth try. She opens the group message that she has with Octavia and Raven, typing out a message to her best friends.

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _Mayday!! *waves white flag* I fucking surrender._

She lets out a deep breath as she waits for a reply. Relief floods through her body as the three dots appear under her message, letting her know that someone is replying.

 ** _O-Face:_** _What’s wrong babe?_

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _Are you dying Griffin?_

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _This is fucking torture. I am going to fucking die here. Why did I let you two talk me into shopping with her?_

**_O-Face:_ ** _What’s going on?_

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _She puts on this gray suit that she looks fucking amazing in. As soon as I see her in the suit, my brain short circuits. Like, I can’t even. This woman is too much. And I tell her that she looks amazing and that she has to change because seeing her dressed like that makes me want to do dirty things to her._

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _The thirst is real._

**_O-Face:_ ** _This bitch is like the Sahara desert by now._

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _No way O. That would mean that she would be in a perma drought. And we both know that there is plenty of moisture…like rainforest status._

**_O-Face:_ ** _That’s true. But she’s still hella thirsty._

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _Um, I’m still here guys._

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _I don’t know what your deal is Princess. If you’re thirsty, go get you a tall glass of Alexandria Woods._

**_O-Face:_ ** _Yeah, that’s always an option. I don’t think that Lexa would be opposed to that._

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _I hate both of you._

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _Lies and slander._

**_O-Face:_ ** _Yeah, no you don’t. You love us._

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _What am I going to do guys? I don’t know how much more I can handle before I spontaneously combust._

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _Go get ‘er tiger!!!_

**_O-Face:_ ** _I agree with Rae. You two need to just butter each other’s muffins._

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _OCTAVIA!!!_

**_O-Face:_ ** _Sorry Clarke. It’s true. You guys have some mad pent-up sexual tension. It’s like a tightly coiled spring. And it’s not going to last much longer before it snaps._

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _Tell her BOO!!!_

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _Ugh. You guys are terrible at giving advice._

**_O-Face:_ ** _Well, you asked._

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _Exactly. And if you don’t snatch up that girl soon, I’m going to ask Ahn if we can have a three way._

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _Oi! You stay away from my Bae Raven!!_

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _Hey! Quit being a little bitch and get your pussy in the game._

**_O-Face:_ ** _Yeah. Quit oppressing Princess Peach. She needs some lovin.’_

**_Princess Griffers:_ ** _Fuck you both. I can’t handle either of you right now._

**_Rae Bae:_ ** _Yassss!! Go get some lady lovin.’ Fish needs his mommas’ to get their shit together._

**_O-Face:_ ** _Lock it down Clarke!_

_“Clarke?”_ Lexa’s soft voice breaks Clarke’s concentration on her phone. She looks up from the device, meeting concerned green eyes. _“Are you okay?”_

_“I’m good. Like so good.”_

_“Are you sure? You kind of ran off pretty quickly.”_

_“Yeah. I’m positive. Just had to go get something to drink. Look Lex, I think that we need to talk.”_

_“Oh god, that doesn’t sound good. Are you having second thoughts about our date?”_

_“No, no. Not at all.”_ Clarke slips her phone back into her pocket. She grabs Lexa’s hand and pulls the other girl towards a nearby bench. Bringing her free hand to Lexa’s shoulder, Clarke presses softly on it to make her sit down before taking a seat next to the brunette. It takes her a minute to realize that she is still holding Lexa’s hand. When she does, she softly pulls her hand away and tangles her own hands together.

 _“Clarke,”_ Lexa begins when Clarke doesn’t immediately speak up. _“You’re making me really nervous.”_

_“I’m not trying to. Look, I just need to get this off of my chest before I lose my nerve. So bear with me for a second.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Alright. So I think that we need to talk about what happened the other day.”_

_“The party? Or the day after?”_

_“Well, I kind of figured that we were done talking about the party. We need to talk about the day after.”_

_“Okay. What of it?”_

_“It’s kind of all that I’ve been able to think about. And it’s kind of driving me crazy. Because I can’t get you out of my mind. And I’m not complaining about it, because I’m used to it by now.”_

_“I’m kind of confused.”_

_“Sorry. I know that I’m rambling. But just listen. Ever since I met you, you’ve been a constant thought in the back of my head. And for the longest time, after you rejected me, I was stuck on the idea of just being your friend. And I was totally okay with that. I mean, not entirely happy about it, but I figured that having you in my life as a friend was better than nothing at all. When you finally showed interest in me, I couldn’t believe it. Because even if you won’t admit it, you’re pretty fucking amazing.”_

_“Clarke, what are you trying to say?”_

_“You’re driving me crazy. In the best possible way, but crazy nonetheless. And you finally asked me out. I’ve been waiting as patiently as possible for you to be ready. But I don’t want to rush things between us. Because I’m all in. I am ready for you. One hundred percent. But I need you to be sure that you are ready for me.”_

_“I am ready.”_

_“I don’t doubt that. Are you really ready to have sex with me though? I mean, I can’t blame you for getting caught up in the moment. I was totally into it too. But I don’t want to rush into hooking up with me, only to regret it later.”_

_“I wouldn’t do that to you, Clarke.”_

_“I know that you wouldn’t. But it could happen, even by accident. I mean, you and Costia were together for a long time. Correct me if I’m wrong, but she was your first pretty much everything. And you lost her three years ago. That’s a pretty devastating blow. I’ve never lost a significant other, but I lost my dad. So I know that it can affect you for a long time.”_

_“I’m ready to give us a chance Clarke. Sometimes life is about more than just surviving.”_ Lexa lifts a hand to Clarke’s chin, tilting her head up until their eyes meet. _“I’ll admit that had pretty much given up on ever being with somebody again after Costia. And for a long time I was okay with that. I was perfectly fine with my life until you barged into my life. Or until I barged into the café while you were working, really. I tried to fight my attraction to you. Because in my mind it felt like I was almost cheating on Costia by being happy. It’s totally illogical, I know.”_

_“Lex…”_

_“No. Let me finish, please. And you were amazing while I was trying to figure things out. I mean, I know how hard it has been for you to wait. Even with the little tryst with Niylah. I understand. You have needs. And the hot and cold game that I was playing had to be incredibly frustrating for you. So I don’t blame you for trying to live your life. But, I’m tired of fighting it. I want to be happy. And you make me happier than I ever thought was possible for me. So, I’m not going to run. Or wake up one day and decide that this, us, is a mistake. I promise you that I’m ready. And even if we have sex tomorrow, or in two years, my answer will be the same. I’m in this for the long run Clarke. I’ll be around for as long as you’ll have me.”_

_“Please don’t make me wait two years for sex. My body can’t handle that kind of wait.”_

_“That’s what you got out of this conversation?”_

_“What? I can’t help it. Sometimes I think with my lady parts.”_

_“Lady parts? Really Clarke? How old are you?”_

_“Um, twenty one. You know this.”_

_“Yes I do. I am well aware of your physical age. I am talking about your maturity level.”_

_“What? Why is that in question?”_

_“Because you just referred to your vagina as your lady parts.”_

_“So? What’s wrong with that?”_

_“Nothing. It’s just something that a teenager would do.”_

_“What would you like me to call it?”_

_“Well, you have a few options. I mean you can go with vagina. That is a widely used term. There are a few others. Pussy seems to be another popular option. Snatch is another. There is also the more unpopular term, cu…”_

_“Lexa! Jesus fucking Christ! Can you not?”_ Clarke can’t fight back the blush that rises on her face and neck as Lexa’s dirty words hit her ears. _“God.”_

_“Or you could always go with my personal favorite.”_

_“Which is?”_

_“Princess Peach.”_

_“WHAT!! Who told you?”_ Clarke drops her face into her hands in mortification. She never wanted Lexa to find out the nickname that she gave her vagina when she was a teenager. Even having a doctor as a mother, she couldn’t bring herself to say vagina when she was younger. When she feels like her face is no longer bright red with embarrassment, she looks back up at Lexa. The brunette has her face scrunched up in mock confusion, her index finger tapping on her temple in contemplation.

_“I’m sure that I have no idea what you’re talking about.”_

_“Liar. Was it Raven?”_

_“I refuse to reveal that information to you.”_

_“Well then I’m not going to go out on a date with you.”_

_“Okay then. I guess that I’ll just join the trifecta that Raven and Anya were talking about.”_

_“Lexa, seriously? Raven literally just talked to me about that.”_

_“I know. Anya must’ve been next to her when she told you, because she texted me while I was looking for you.”_

_“Well, you’d better fucking not join those two assholes. I’ve waited patiently for you for months. You’re mine.”_

_“Yours eh?”_ Lexa smirks at Clarke’s assertive words. There is something about the blonde’s tone that sends a rush of excitement through her body. She feels her body moving slightly towards Clarke’s, but she doesn’t try to stop herself.

 _“Yes.”_ Clarke doesn’t miss a beat in closing the miniscule amount of distance between them. She presses her lips firmly against Lexa’s. The kiss is possessive and rough, and Lexa can’t get enough of it. She would be one hundred percent okay if every one of their kisses felt like this. Clarke’s lips are soft but insistent. Pressing but gentle. She kisses like she paints. With complete confidence and reckless abandon. It makes Lexa see stars in every color. And it ends way before she’s ready for it to. Clarke’s forehead comes to rest against hers, soft breaths washing over Lexa’s face. _“I don’t share.”_ Clarke’s voice is raspy but her tone is firm.

Lexa is powerless against the jolt of arousal that travels down her body at the words coming out of Clarke’s mouth. Normally, she would be pretty upset with the possessive nature of Clarke’s actions. But she can’t bring herself to mind. Maybe it’s the way that Clarke molded their lips together, claiming Lexa’s mouth as her own. She literally kissed Lexa stupid. And she loved every second of the. All she can think about is Clarke’s lips and how they felt against hers. And she wants to feel them again. So she takes what she wants. The surprised gasp that Clarke makes is swallowed by Lexa as the brunette crashes their mouths together.

This time when they break apart, Lexa is the one left panting. She drops her face into the crook of Clarkes’ neck, greedily breathing in the blonde’s scent. Lexa can’t stop herself from presses her lips a few times against Clarke’s wildly fluttering pulse point, causing a quiet groan to fall from her mouth. When she reluctantly pulls her mouth away from Clarke’s neck, her eyes take in the blonde’s current state. Clarke’s eyes are significantly darker than normal, an almost midnight blue hue around blown pupils. Her cheeks are flushed red and her mouth is slightly agape.

_“Okay, whatever that was for, I like it. But I still don’t share.”_

_“I don’t either.”_

_“Good. Did you decide on your suit?”_

_“Yes. I am getting the gray one.”_

_“Good, that’s good.”_

_“Do we need to go get a dress for you?”_

_“No. Octavia and I already picked one out last week. It’s at my dorm.”_

_“Can I see it?”_

_“Maybe. Or maybe I make you wait until the wedding.”_

_“That’s not fair. I dressed up for you.”_ Lexa pushes her bottom lip out in a pout.

 _“Awww. Well, we will have to see.”_ Clarke presses a kiss to Lexa’s pouting lip.

_“You’re mean.”_

_“No, I’m not. Come on; let’s go back to your apartment.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa was pretty sure that this was the best day of her life. She was having a blast hanging out with Clarke. They picked out an awesome suit for her to wear to Octavia’s brother’s wedding. Not only did Clarke ogle her while she was dressed to the nines, she managed to fluster Clarke enough to make her lose control of her actions. Not that she should really be proud of that, but she is.

On the car ride back to campus, they are mostly silent. Lexa has her nineties playlist playing through the car’s stereo, and they have both been singing along to the songs of their childhoods.

They are only five minutes away from Lexa’s apartment when everything manages to go to shit. Clarke’s phone begins to ring. When she pulls the device out of her jeans, the number is not one that Clarke is familiar with. She silences the ringer quickly and shrugs her shoulders at the questioning look that Lexa gives her.

_“Unknown caller.”_

_“Hmm.”_

The phone rings again almost immediately, the same number popping up on the screen.

_“You should answer it.”_

_“I dunno.”_

Clarke silences the phone once again before setting the device in her lap. After another minute the phone rings again. This time, because of Lexa’s pointed glare, Clarke swipes to pick up the call. She hits the speaker phone icon on the screen, clearing her throat before speaking.

_“Hello?”_

_“It’s about time. I was beginning to think that you were pointedly ignoring my phone calls, Clarke.”_

_“Hello mother.”_

Lexa barely manages to choke back the gasp lodged in her throat. She feels a flare of anger resonate in her chest at how small Clarke’s voice sounds. Seeing as they are at a red light, she turns her attention to the passenger seat. Clarke has brought her feet up onto the seat. She has her phone balanced on one knee while her cheek is resting on the other. She is facing Lexa but her eyes are screwed shut in what resembles pain. Her posture gives off such a strong feeling of sadness and defeat that it makes Lexa’s heart hurt. She wants to reach over and comfort her friend. She scoffs internally at the word friend. They are not even close to being just friends anymore. She can’t call Clarke her girlfriend, at least not yet. Love interest sounds so romance novel. Make out buddy is demeaning to what they really are. She finally settles on calling the blonde what she really is. Her Clarke. She so badly wants to comfort her Clarke, but her responsible side reminds her that she needs to focus her attentions on driving. So she has to settle for placing her free hand on Clarke’s thigh in what she hopes is a comforting touch.

_“It’s been awhile since you’ve called me.”_

_“Yeah. About two and a half years now.”_

_“How are you Clarke?”_

_“Peachy.”_

_“Really? That’s good to hear. How is school?”_

_“School is fine mother.”_

_“Are you still studying art instead of medicine?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Hmm.”_

_“Is there a reason why you’ve called me this afternoon? Surely it isn’t so that we can talk about school.”_

_“You’re right. Although it’s not too late for you to change your mind and return to pre med.”_

_“Mom. I am not going to change my major again. I am going to stick with art. It’s what makes me happy.”_

_“Art will not provide you with a steady income Clarke. You should think about this logically.”_

_“I am! I’m not going back to medicine. And you don’t get to have an opinion on what I do with my life. You lost that privilege when you cut me off.”_

_“I did that for your own good. I gave you a choice.”_

_“Yes, get my degree in medicine, or figure out a way to pay for school myself.”_

_“Well, you made your own decision.”_

_“Exactly. So you don’t get to dictate my future anymore. I pay for school myself. By working my ass off at two different jobs.”_

_“Clarke. There is no need for crass language. I am merely trying to ensure that you become a successful adult after you finish school.”_

_“And I will. Because I am good at what I do.”_

_“You were also good at medicine.”_

_“Mom, seriously. If you called just to berate me on my life choices, I suggest that we end this call right now.”_

_“I called to talk to you about Bellamy’s wedding.”_

_“What about it?”_

_“Well, Aurora called to tell me that you told Bellamy that you will be in attendance. I just wanted to know if that was true.”_

_“Yes, mom. I will be there.”_

_“Good. That’s good. It will be nice to see you again, since you never come home on your breaks anymore.”_

_“I don’t have the luxury of taking time off of work mom. At least not if I want to be able to pay for school.”_

_“Well, still. You haven’t been home since you left for school. I miss you Clarke.”_

Clarke wants to believe her mom, she really does. But she knows that there is an underlying reason for this phone call. One that is sure to upset her more than this phone call has managed to. The only thing keeping her grounded right now is Lexa’s soft touch on her thigh.

_“Do you really though?”_

_“Of course I do, you’re my daughter.”_

_“Well, that’s nice. You’ll get to see me in a week when I am in town for Bell’s wedding.”_

_“That’s good. I have the perfect date for you. One of my colleague’s sons just moved back to town after graduating. He is starting his residency at the hospital in a month. He’s just your type Clarke. Looks a little bit like Bellamy actually. You know, I can’t help but wonder, would this be your wedding had you given him a chance?”_

_“Ugh, mom. Bell has always been more like a brother to me.”_

_“Yeah, but he has been in love with you since you guys were kids.”_

_“Well, I don’t feel the same way. And even if I did, he’s getting married to somebody else.”_

_“That’s okay. Like I said, I have the perfect guy for you.”_

_“Mom, I don’t need or want you to set me up. I’m bringing a date anyway.”_

_“Oh? Are you bringing that boy that you were dating your freshman year? Finn was it?”_

_“No mom. Finn was a two timing asshole. He was cheating on Raven with me. And probably countless other girls too.”_

_“Hmm. Well no matter. I never really liked him anyway. I wasn’t aware that you were dating somebody else. What is the name of the fine young gentleman that you are bringing along?”_

_“Her name is Lexa.”_

_“Oh.”_

_“Oh what?”_

_“You’re still experimenting with girls I see.”_

_“No.”_

_“No what? You’re not experimenting. So then you’re bringing a friend. So I can bring Bradley along as a date for you.”_

_“Mom no. I’m not experimenting with girls. I’m bisexual. That means that I like guys and girls. I’m not experimenting. I’m not confused. I am attracted to both genders.”_

_“That’s not a thing Clarke.”_

_“Yes it is.”_

_“You’re just experimenting. I hear that girls do that sometimes in college. It wasn’t unheard of when I was in college either.”_

_“Why aren’t you listening to me? I’m not experimenting. I’ve known that I liked girls since I was thirteen. That’s not going to change.”_

_“It will change eventually. You’ll marry a man because that is what the bible says is right.”_

_“Don’t you dare try and pull that bible bullshit on me. You’re not even religious mom.”_

_“Actually, Marcus and I are active in the church now.”_

_“I don’t care what you and Marcus do.”_

_“Well you should care. What do you think your father would’ve said?”_

_“Are you fucking serious right now!”_

Lexa pulls Anya’s car into the designated parking spot for their apartment. She turns the car off and turns to fully face Clarke. Her eyes are still screwed shut, but Lexa can see trails of wetness glistening on Clarke’s reddened cheeks. Her voice is still strong on the phone, which Lexa is super proud of. But the fact that her Clarke is hurting right now makes Lexa’s blood boil. Without a second thought, Lexa moves her hand off of Clarke’s thigh and smashes her finger against the screen of the phone, effectively ending the call.

_“Clarke?”_

Clarke gets out of the car without another word, leaving a very confused and pissed off Lexa behind in the driver’s seat.

She doesn’t know how long she sits in the car fuming. She is so caught up in her anger that she doesn’t even realize that she has been crying all along. It takes her another few minutes to calm herself down. She hastily wipes the evidence of tears off of her face as she gets out of the car.

The walk up to the apartment isn’t as calming as she had hoped. By the time she reaches the front door, her body is coiled tightly with an angst filled tension. Even if Clarke managed to hide it, Lexa knows that her face and body language will immediately give her away. With a resigned sigh, she places her hand on the doorknob and reluctantly opens it.

The tension is thick in the air of the apartment, and it instantly makes it hard to breathe. Anya and Raven are sitting on the couch, their eyes wide with concern. Lexa meets her best friend’s gaze and immediately feels tears prickle in the corners of her eyes.

_“Is everything okay?”_

_“No, not really.”_ Lexa’s voice sounds foreign to her own ears. Soft and broken in a way that makes her want to cry all over again.

_“What happened? Did you do something to hurt her? I don’t want to have to kick your ass Lexa. But if you hurt my best friend, you leave me with no choice.”_

_“Chil au, Reivon.”_

_“Don’t start with the trigedasleng. What’s wrong with Clarke?”_

_“Her mom called while we were driving home.”_

_“What? Did she answer the call?”_

_“Yes. The number was unknown and it kept calling until she picked up.”_

_“Fucking hell.”_ Raven grabs her phone off of the bedside table. She types something into what Lexa assumes is a text message. When she looks back up at Lexa, the brunette has slumped onto the living room floor. Her back is pressed against the wall that is near the front door. Raven can see the stress written across Lexa’s face. Her eyes, although clear, are stormy and glistening with unshed tears.

Raven’s phone rings a second later, Octavia’s ringtone filling the otherwise silent living room. Raven wastes no time in answering the call, putting on speaker immediately.

_“Hey O.”_

_“Don’t you hey O me. Where the fuck is Clarke? I tried to call her cell phone but it went straight to voicemail. So I am assuming that she turned it off.”_

_“Dude, chill out for a fucking second. Clarke is safe. She locked herself in the bathroom at Ahn and Lexa’s place.”_

_“What happened?”_

_“Her mom called her.”_

_“Well, no shit Sherlock. I need deets.”_

_“I don’t have any details O. Lexa just walked into the apartment and shut down.”_

_“Fuck, fuck, fuck. I don’t know how Abby got Clarke’s phone number considering that we’ve changed it since the last time this happened.”_

_“I don’t know either. All I know is that it’s bad.”_

_“Do I need to come out there? I don’t get off of work for an hour, but I see if Indra will let me cut out early.”_

_“No, don’t leave early. I’ll handle it. Just come over around dinner time. We can have a diner and movie night.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Yeah, I’m positive.”_

_“Okay. Well, I expect full details when I get there.”_

_“Only if you bring Chinese.”_

_“Will do.”_

_“Love you Boo!”_

_“Me too.”_

The call ends with a beep. Raven sets the phone back onto the living room table. She gets off of the couch with a grunt, limping slightly as she makes her way over to Lexa’s slumped form. She slides down the wall, landing her ungracefully in a sitting position on the floor next to Lexa. The brunette doesn’t even acknowledge Raven’s presence, too lost in her own world. She startles when Raven places a hand on her shoulder, her stormy green eyes locking onto Raven’s face.

_“Lex.”_

_“Hmm?”_

_“What happened?”_

_“She told Clarke that she would never have a lucrative career as an artist.”_

_“Of course she did. She always brings that up.”_

_“Well Clarke held her own during that part of the conversation. Really, she did well the whole time. If you weren’t looking at her, you wouldn’t’ve been able to tell that she was even upset.”_

_“That’s my girl.”_

_“Yeah. She did wonderful. And then Abby asked if Clarke was going to be at Bellamy’s wedding. And Clarke told her yes. To which Abby replied that she had a date for Clarke. The son of one of her colleagues. Then she went on to talk about how Clarke could’ve given Bellamy a chance. That maybe if she had, they would be the ones getting married. Clarke told her that she didn’t want to be set up with anybody and that she already had a date.”_

_“I already feel like this did not turn out well.”_

_“Yeah, you would be correct in your assumption. Abby asked Clarke the guy’s name that she was going to bring. Clarke informed her mother that she was bringing me. Abby went off on a tangent about how Clarke was still experimenting with girls. Clarke fought back and told her mom that she was not experimenting. That she was bisexual and she had known since she was thirteen. She talked about a guy named Marcus that she had recently been going to church with. Clarke said that she didn’t care about what Abby ad Marcus did. I figured that we were at the end of the conversation. Until Abby had to open her mouth again.”_

_“Oh lord.”_

_“She said that Clarke should be concerned with what the bible said about being gay.”_

_“What a bitch.”_

_“Yeah. Then she said, what would your father think?”_

_“Oh fuck.”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Lexa. I already tried to get her out of the bathroom while you were still in the car. She wouldn’t even answer the door. I don’t know if you want to try and get her to come out.”_

_“I mean, I guess that I can. I don’t know how successful I’m going to be.”_

_“Well, you’ll never know if you don’t try.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“If you get her to come out, she’s going to want to cuddle. The last time this happened, we stayed in her bed for two days.”_

_“Well, good thing that we are out of school for the summer.”_ Lexa gets to her feet slowly. As soon as she is settled on her feet, she holds out her hand to help Raven up.

She wipes her slightly sweaty hands on her pants, nodding at Raven before she turns away.

_“She really likes the movie ‘Finding Nemo’ so that might help.”_

_“Thanks Raven.”_

_“Anytime.”_

As Lexa stops in front of the bathroom door, she can feel her body fill up with a nervous energy. She stands in front of the slightly ominous wooden doorway. She can hear Clarke’s sniffles on the other side and it makes her heart beat painfully in her chest. Raising her hand up, she knocks tentatively before she chickens out.

_“Go away Raven.”_

Clarke’s voice breaks out after a few moments of silence.

_“It’s Lexa. Can I please come in?”_

_“No.”_

_“Please.”_

It takes another few minutes before Lexa hears the lock click open. She wastes no time in opening the door, walking purposefully into the bathroom. Clarke is huddled in the corner near the tub, her back resting against the cool porcelain. Her body is hunched over so that she can rest her head against her bent knees. Even in the mostly dark bathroom, Lexa can make out the tears that are freely streaming down Clarke’s face. The sight makes her eyes tear up once again. This time she is unable to stop them before they begin to spill over. She wipes them away so that she doesn’t upset Clarke any more than she already is.

Lexa immediately slides down so that she is sitting next to Clarke, her back resting against the wall. Their knees touch because of how close Lexa is. Clarke is either too out of it to notice Lexa’s knees pressing into hers, or she just chooses not to say anything about it.

 _“Hey.”_ Lexa starts, sliding her foot against Clarke softly in an attempt to gain her attention. When that doesn’t garner a response, Lexa prods Clarke’s foot again. This time when Clarke finally looks up and meets Lexa’s eyes, she can’t hide her tears from the blonde. Clarke looks so broken and it makes Lexa’s blood boil. _“Come here.”_ Lexa pats the space in-between her legs on the floor. Clarke lets out a sob as she contemplates Lexa’s request. _“Please Clarke.”_ Clarke seems to battle internally for a moment before she makes her move. She lifts one of her legs over Lexa’s lap and effectively straddles the brunette. Lexa wraps her arms around Clarke’s waist and pulls their chests flush together. Clarke’s arms come to rest on Lexa’s shoulders. One wraps around her neck while the other tangles into Lexa’s wavy brunette locks. Clarke’s face nuzzles into the side of Lexa’s neck. She lets out a half sigh, half sob as she breathes Lexa in. Her cries don’t falter or slow down and Lexa can feel the hot tears soaking into the fabric of her shirt.

Lexa is really at a loss as to what she should do. She’s never really been a touchy feely person, until Clarke came into her life that is. It’s almost as if she craves the physical closeness with the blonde. She rubs her fingers up and down Clarke’s back in what she hopes is a soothing gesture. She hates that her Clarke is hurting, and she wants nothing more than to make her feel better.

 _“Clarke.”_ Lexa presses her lips against the top of Clarke’s head. _“I’m going to pick you up now.”_

Clarke mumbles what sounds like ‘okay’ into Lexa’s neck, but she doesn’t lift her head. Lexa slides her hands down Clarke’s back, stopping when they come to rest at the curve of her ass. She tightens her grip before she begins to stand up. It takes her a minute of struggling due to the awkward positioning of their bodies, but she manages to pick Clarke up without too much trouble. Clarke’s legs wrap around her waist to steady them as she moves out of the bathroom.

When she gets into her bedroom, Clarke’s cries have calmed down a little. She is hiccupping against Lexa’s neck as she fights to catch her breath. Lexa moves them over to the bed to lay Clarke down. Clarke’s arms and legs tighten around her body in panic as Lexa tries to let her go.

_“Hey, calm down. It’s okay Clarke. I’m just trying to lay you down on my bed.”_

_“I don’t want you to leave me.”_

_“I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”_

_“Please don’t. Don’t ever leave me.”_

Clarke doesn’t fight Lexa this time as she moves to lay her down. She immediately moves to the other side of the bed and climbs in. Clarke moves across the bed in a flash and molds her body against Lexa’s. The desperation in which Clarke clings to her makes a fresh wave of tears blur her vision. Clarke’s face nuzzles into Lexa’s neck and a deep sigh leaves her mouth as she breathes the brunette in.

_“I’m so sorry Clarke.”_

_“What? Why are you sorry?”_ Clarke croaks.

_“Because nobody should have to deal with that.”_

_“It’s not your fault.”_

_“I know. But I’m still sorry.”_

_“It’s fine.”_

_“It’s her loss, you know.”_ Clarke lifts her head from where it’s resting on Lexa’s chest. Her red rimmed eyes gaze into Lexa’s questioningly. Lexa leans in to press her lips firmly against Clarke’s forehead. _“If she can’t see you for the amazing woman that you are, she doesn’t deserve to be in your life.”_

_“I just don’t understand how she can be so hateful.”_

_“Prejudice is the child of ignorance.”_

_“How can she treat her only child like that?”_

_“I don’t know Clarke. But I think that you were wise to cut her out of your life. You shouldn’t be subjected to such blind hatred.”_

_“Does your mom accept your sexuality?”_

_“Yes. My mom doesn’t care about my preferences. She loves me for who I am.”_

_“What about your dad?”_

_“He’s….complicated.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“He isn’t and has never been in my life. So his opinion about me would be invalid. He was dating my mom and as soon as she found out that she was pregnant, he took off.”_

_“Wow, that’s pretty messed up. I’m sorry.”_

_“Don’t be. My mother did an amazing job raising me.”_

_“So if you could go back, would you change anything? Maybe have your father stick around?”_

_“No.”_

Clarke snuggles back into Lexa’s chest with a sigh. After a few moments of silence, Lexa can hear Clarke’s breathing slow down. As she feels Clarke’s body relax into sleep against her, she hears the faintest whisper from the blonde.

_“I wish that I could be as strong as you.”_

Lexa feels her heart constrict at Clarke’s words. She presses her lips against the blonde’s forehead before resting her chin on top of Clarke’s head.

_“You are so much stronger than I am. I only wish that I could be as strong as you.”_

_“Stop it before you make me fall in love with you.”_ Clarke’s words are slurred with sleep, leading Lexa to believe that she is mostly asleep. Her suspicions are confirmed when Clarke begins to softly snore against her ear.

In this moment, she no longer has to be strong for Clarke. So she finally allows herself to break down. To feel all of the pain that she has been holding in since she had to listen to Abby tear down her amazing daughter. She doesn’t try to stop the tears that are now streaming down her cheeks. For the sake of not waking Clarke up, she does stifle her sobs, forcing herself to cry silently as Clarke sleeps. She just lies there, overcome with emotion and amazement at the strength that Clarke has shown throughout the day.

She’s not sure how long she cries as Clarke sleeps positioned halfway on top of her. She cries until she doesn’t feel like she can anymore. Until her pillow is surely soaked through with the evidence of her emotions. She’s glad that Clarke is asleep, because she definitely doesn’t want the blonde to see her like this. As her tears quiet down, Lexa beings to feel her body shut down with fatigue, and she is unable to stop the word vomit as it tumbles past her lips.

_“I’m pretty sure that I’m already falling.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Waking up in a panic is not something that Clarke particularly enjoys. Once in a while isn’t the end of the world, but twice in one week? Now that she is not okay with. She really should be used to waking up in Lexa’s arms, considering that the past couple of weeks have found the two girls more often than not waking up in this very position. Maybe it’s the high level of emotions coursing through her veins right now, or maybe it is the insane amount of attraction that she feels towards the girl that is holding her as she sleeps. But she wakes up with her heart pounding painfully against her ribcage and the overwhelming urge to run.

 One look at Lexa’s face is enough to change her mind. The normal serene look that is on Lexa’s face when she sleeps is not present this time. Her face is screwed up in what looks like pain, her jaw taut with tension.

It’s the puffiness of Lexa’s eyes that makes her heart clench painfully in her chest. Clarke can tell by the amount of swelling around those eyes that she is addicted to, that Lexa has been crying. And it looks like she spent a good amount of time crying. Her cheeks are puffy and Clarke feels a stab of remorse shoot throughout her body.

She absolutely hates that Lexa spent time crying while she slept, especially considering that she was likely crying because of the day’s events.

Ugh. Her mother. Ever since her father had died, she’d had an extremely rocky relationship with her mom. Abby was always career driven and incredibly focused on work, but after Jake died, her tendencies become almost obsessive. Clarke knew that her mom was suffering, trying to figure out how to survive without Jake by her side. She really tried to understand, but she was only eleven years old when she lost her father, and she really needed her mom by her side as she was mourning.

Abby made the decision to pull away when Clarke needed her the most. And it put a huge strain on their relationship as she grew up. She wasn’t around much when Clarke was going through her awkward teenage years. She wasn’t there for Clarke to ask for advice when it came to boys, or to ask her for help with her homework. Octavia and Bellamy’s mom Aurora did a fantastic job of picking up the slack that Abby left. And so when Clarke began to realize that she was also attracted to girls, Aurora was the first person that she told.

Coming out as bisexual was equally terrifying and exhilarating for Clarke. She was scared of what Aurora would say, of how her opinion of Clarke would change. Or that she would tell Clarke that liking the same sex was wrong and that she would go to hell if she didn’t change her ways. Not that the Blake’s were a very religious family, but that didn’t stop the panic from settling deep into Clarke’s core.

She definitely wasn’t expecting the reaction that she got when she told Aurora. Clarke became a blubbering mess as Aurora told her that love was love, and that she was loved regardless of who she was attracted to. That was the day that she started to regard Aurora as her mom over Abby. Sure, she’d already been practically living at the Blake’s since Jake died two years ago, but this was different. After that day, Clarke came to Aurora for advice on everything.

If only Abby could’ve had the same reaction as Aurora. Clarke had attempted to tell Abby twice her sexuality twice. The first time that she tried to tell her mom was a few months after she told Aurora. Abby brushed off the confession, or didn’t really hear Clarke at all. She only muttered a ‘That’s nice honey’ while her attention was zeroed in on some files from work.

The second time that she told Abby was pretty much forced. Abby made an all too rare appearance at home on a Friday afternoon to find Clarke in a pretty risqué position with her girlfriend at the time. Abby promptly kicked the other girl out, and never mentioned it again. This reaction led Clarke to believe that Abby was accepting of her being bisexual.

Once again, Abby proved Clarke wrong. Apparently, she is very much against Clarke being bi and was completely demeaning in her inability to accept it. Calling her blossoming relationship with Lexa an experiment was quite possibly the worst insult that has ever been hurled in her direction.

A soft groan breaks Clarke away from her inner musings. Lexa has begun to stir in her sleep, seemingly waking up. Her arms tighten around Clarke’s waist as she starts to fight away her slumber. Green eyes crack open, bloodshot sclera proving Clarke’s assumptions correct.

 _“Hi.”_ Lexa’s husky ‘just woke up’ voice is probably the sexiest thing that Clarke has ever heard. It makes her wonder what Lexa’s voice sounds like during sex. If her voice has that same sexy timbre to it as she gets closer to a blissful climax.

 _‘Wait, what? Get your head out of the gutter and into the game, Griffin.’_ She mentally chastises herself as she continues to silently stare at Lexa’s sleepy face. The brunette is still holding their bodies against each other and she has now begun to nuzzle her face lazily into the crook of Clarke’s neck. It’s sending the most pleasant shivers through Clarke’s body, and it’s driving her absolutely crazy.

 _“Hi,”_ she rasps back, bringing her fingers up to tangle into Lexa’s sleep mussed locks. She gives the gentlest of tugs, causing Lexa to groan and press harder into her neck. _“How’d you sleep?”_

 _“Okay,”_ Lexa’s response is muffled against Clarke’s skin as her lips brush over the sensitive flesh. _“You?”_

 _“Fine. I slept fine.” The ‘Even better because being in your arms makes me feel safe,’_ goes unsaid, but Clarke pretty much screams the response inside of her head.

_“Should probably get up.”_

Sleepy Lexa is probably Clarke’s favorite. Granted, she pretty much says this every single time a new side of Lexa’s personality shows, but who cares? Right now, sleepy Lexa is her favorite.

_“I don’t want to get up. You’re warm.”_

Lexa giggles. Giggles! Yeah, sleepy Lexa is definitely her favorite. After another few minutes of ignoring the outside world, Clarke reluctantly extracts her body out of Lexa’s arms. Her first order of business is to relieve her very full bladder.

She quickly takes care of her business in the bathroom. When she walks back into Lexa’s bedroom, the brunette is still sprawled across the bed, but she has the pillow that Clarke was using covering her face.

_“Are you sniffing the pillow that I was using?”_

Lexa quickly pulls the pillow off of her face and tosses it onto the floor. The look of embarrassment on her face as she squeaks out a surprised, _“No,”_ is so endearing that it makes Clarke want to kiss her.

_“Are you going to get out of bed?”_

_“No?”_

_“As appealing as it sounds to stay in bed with you all day, we should probably hang out with our friends at some point.”_

_“Or we could just stay in bed.”_

_“Only if you take off your pants.”_

_“What?”_

_“Well, the only way that I am going to stay in bed is if we are doing something other than sleeping.”_

_“What?”_

_“Come on Lex, don’t you wanna do something else?”_ Clarke slowly crawls back onto the bed. She lifts her body over Lexa’s and settles down on the brunette’s hips. Lexa audibly gasps at the very unexpected but welcome weight, bringing her hands to rest on Clarke’s waist. _“Or maybe someone else?”_

_“Clarke.”_

_“Yes?”_

_“This is not a fair game.”_

_“I think that it’s very fair.”_

_“Clarke, are we going to talk about what happened with your mom?”_

_“Can we not?”_

_“Okay, I’m not going to force it, but I know that you’re hurting right now. And that’s totally understandable."_

_“I’m fine.”_

_“You don’t have to be fine.”_

_“I know that. Seriously though, I’m good. It’s not worth wasting any tears about it. If she doesn’t want to accept the way that I want to live my life, then she doesn’t deserve to be in it.”_

_“You’re right.”_

_“And I shouldn’t’ve gotten so upset about it. But it felt like she was demeaning our relationship, you know? It’s just like, it shouldn’t mean any less because the person that I am attracted to is a woman. And it’s just really shitty.”_

_“Clarke. I get it. It’s really crappy. But don’t let her ignorant words make you feel like what we have isn’t amazing.”_

_“Amazing eh?”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“Oi! Lezbos! Quit buttering each other’s muffins. O brought Chinese food and I’m tired of waiting.”_ Raven’s voice booms from the other side of Lexa’s bedroom door, effectively causing the two women to break apart.

 

 _“I’m going to choke her with an egg roll.”_ Clarke grumbles as she reluctantly gets off of Lexa.

 _“Don’t do that. It sounds messy.”_ Lexa laughs as the two make their way out of the bedroom.

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“We should watch Deadpool.”_ Raven exclaims over a mouthful of rice.

 _“Yass! I second that idea.”_ Octavia’s hand shoots up in the air excitedly. _“Ryan Reynolds is so sexy.”_

 _“So are we watching this movie just so we can sexualize Ryan Reynolds? Because if that is the case, my vote is no.”_ Lexa questions the two girls, taking a small bite of her chicken and broccoli.

_“No way dude, this movie is supposed to be legit. Ryan Reynolds is just a nice treat.”_

_“Okay then. If it’s a good movie, then I change my vote to yes.”_

_“Okay. Deadpool it is.”_ Lincoln gets up from the couch so that he can get the blu ray set up. He starts the movie before sitting back down next to Octavia. She cuddles back up to him as they continue eating.

Raven and Anya have opted to sit in a giant bean bag chair that Raven drug out of Anya’s bedroom. According to Anya, the thing is called a lovesac and every time that she says it, Raven laughs.

The only other piece of furniture in the living room is a recliner that is definitely not big enough for two people to sit comfortably. That doesn’t deter Clarke from cuddling up with Lexa on the small leather chair. Lexa would be lying if she said that she wasn’t comfortable, even though she hardly has enough room to eat her dinner. Fish is on the ground on the side of the chair, more interested in sleeping then socializing right now.

 _“Are you going to spend the whole movie ogling Ryan Reynolds too?”_ Lexa whispers in Clarke’s ear, secretly delighting in the shiver that rumbles through the blonde’s body.

_“Are you kidding me? I can barely focus on anything other than the fact that your body is pressed up against my back.”_

Clarke’s retort leaves Lexa speechless, and more than a little bit turned on.

The movie turns out to be quite enjoyable, even though Lexa has no idea who this Deadpool character is. She must admit that the crude humor of the movie made her giggle like a teenager, much to Clarke’s delight. She can’t help but love seeing Lexa so carefree and it makes her stomach fill with butterflies.

_“Well, that movie was actually pretty good, I must admit.”_

_“See! I told you that it was good. And man, Ryan looked pretty damn good.”_ Raven claps a hand against her thigh in triumph.

_“I feel like his girlfriend was more attractive.”_

_“Well, I mean you would.”_

_“What’s that supposed to mean?”_ Lexa’s eyebrows rise questioningly.

_“You’re pretty fucking gay, Lexa. So I would be pretty fucking surprised if you said that a dude was attractive._

_“Just because I identify as a lesbian doesn’t mean that I can’t appreciate his musculature.”_

_“That is such a Lexa thing to say.”_

_“She’s right babe,”_ Clarke whispers in her ear, eliciting a shiver out of the brunette.

_“Babe huh.”_

_“I like it.”_

_“Better not let the masses hear you call me that.”_

_“I don’t care what they say.”_

_“Hey! No whispering during group hangout time.”_

_‘Sorry’_ is muttered by both Clarke and Lexa as they turn their attention back to the group. The two couples are talking about their favorite parts in the movie as they debate what they should watch next.

 _“I vote for Krampus.”_ Octavia replies as she grabs another crab puff off of the table.

 _“No dude, we should watch that movie The Forest. It has that one girl from Game of Thrones. Margery.”_ Raven argues back.

_“I heard that movie was crap babe.”_

_“Yeah it probably is, but at least she’s hot.”_

_“I mean, she’s alright. But her upper lip curls up weird when she talks.”_ Clarke says as she grabs a cold piece of chicken off of Lexa’s long forgotten plate.

_“Of course you would notice that Clarke.”_

_“What? I like lips. They’re like my favorite thing on a girl.”_

_“I like boobs.”_

_“You would.”_

_“What? Come on Princess. You can’t tell me that you don’t like a nice pair of knockers.”_

_“I mean, of course I do. Who doesn’t like a good pair? Even O likes boobs.”_

_“It’s true, I do. Especially Clarke’s boobs.”_

Lexa feels a small flare of jealousy roll through her body as Raven and Octavia begin to talk about Clarke’s ‘assets.’ She knows that it’s not logical to be so jealous, but she can’t really help it. Especially considering that the people talking about Clarke are her friends. Unfortunately for Lexa, her brain didn’t get the memo.

_“What do you think about Clarke’s boobs, Lex?”_

Anya’s voice breaks Lexa’s internal struggle. She turns her head to meet Anya’s amused stare.

_“Yeah, what do you think about the girls, Lexie?”_

_“Um,”_ Lexa feels a little bit flustered by the question and by all of the stares focused in her direction. The smug look on Clarke’s face is what makes her next decision for her. She refuses to be rendered speechless by Clarke and Anya’s brazen words, and she knows that her next move is an unexpected one.

Her hands are currently around Clarke’s hips, fingers interlocked and resting on her stomach. She unweaves her fingers and slides them up Clarke’s body, the tips of them tickling at the blonde as she moves. Clarke jolts at the move, squirming as Lexa’s hands move. They come to an abrupt stop at the bottom of her ribs.

Lexa’s next move garners the loudest gasp out of Clarke that she has heard yet. Clarke lets out a slightly breathy groan at the end of the gasp as Lexa’s hands come up to cup the aforementioned boobs. All of the eyes that were trained on the two girls widen in surprise at the action, but Clarke eyes slip closed as Lexa’s hands squeeze the ample flesh discreetly so as not to raise suspicions in the room.

_“I’m more of an ass girl, but yeah, these do not disappoint.”_

_“Holy shit Lex, get some boobage!”_ Raven catcalls, letting out a loud whoop at the end. The rest of the group voices the agreeance before they continue their movie debate, oblivious to Clarke and Lexa in the corner. Much to Lexa’s satisfaction. She lets her thumbs brush over Clarke’s nipples, relishing in the way that Clarke pushes harder against her hands.

_“Now who’s not playing fair?”_

_“Hmm, all’s fair in love and war Miss Griffin.”_

_“Well, unless you plan on finishing what you’re starting, I suggest that you stop playing with them.”_

_“You’re not ready for this, Clarke.”_

_“Considering that your hand isn’t currently down my pants, I don’t think that you know the answer to that.”_

_“Dammit, Clarke.”_

_“What’s the matter Lexie? Don’t want to know the fact that I am more than ready for you? Or maybe the fact that this pair of underwear is ruined because of you and it’s not the first pair that you’ve caused me to ruin.”_

_“Fuck.”_

_“I mean, isn’t that what we’re talking about? How great your hands feel on me right now? Or maybe how much I wish that you would slide your hands down my pants, so you can see just how ready I am for you?”_

_“Okay, you’ve got to stop. I can’t handle anymore.”_

_“Why not? You started it. Putting your hands on the girls and all.”_

_“Yeah but you straddled me earlier.”_

_“That’s true, but you’ve had me in a constant state of arousal pretty much since I met you.”_

Lexa presses a soft kiss to Clarke’s cheek as she moves her hands back down to rest on Clarke’s stomach.

_“Soon. We’ll be there before you know it.”_

_“I know, I know. It’ll be well worth the wait. But is it time for our date yet?”_

_“Not yet Miss Impatient. I had planned for us to go out somewhere when we get to San Diego. If you want to go out sooner than that, I can plan something here.”_

_“No, no. I can wait. As long as we go out on the first night.”_

_“Of course. I hope that you like what I have planned.”_

_“We could sit in a chair just like this in Octavia’s parent’s living room and I would be perfectly happy with that. As long as you are there with me, that’s all that matters.”_

_“Clarke, you know just what to say to make a girl swoon.”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“Hey, are you guys done with your second whisper session so that we can watch Krampus.”_

_‘Sorry,’_ is voiced by both Clarke and Lexa once again as they blatantly ignore their friends. They turn their attention to the screen, where the opening scene of the movie begins to play.

 _“When are those two going to figure out that they’re in love with each other? It’s so gross to watch.”_ Raven leans in to whisper at the other three in the room.

_“I feel like they’ve come a long way. I have never seen Lexa be so bold as to grab somebody’s boobs in front of other people.”_

_“Plus there is the whole date thing.”_

_“What date thing?”_ Raven’s face screws up in confusion.

_“Lexa asked Clarke out on a date this morning.”_

_“WHAT! Are you fucking serious?”_

_“As a heart attack.”_

_“Oh my fucking god. CLARK JANE GRIFFIN!”_ Clarke looks over at Raven, who has gotten to her feet in her shock. She is standing near the recliner with her hands on her hips.

_“What’s the problem?”_

_“Well. Octavia just informed me that Lexa asked you out on a date this morning. And I want to know why the fuck I wasn’t informed of this.”_

_“Goddammit O! I told you not to tell Raven or Anya. What the fuck?”_

_“Hey! I don’t know why it’s such a big deal. She’s your best friend too.”_

_“Yeah, plus I already knew.”_ Anya speaks up from her spot on the lovesac.

 _“What?! How!?!”_ Raven turns to glare at her girlfriend.

 _“I overheard Clarke and Lexa talking when I went to the bathroom this morning.”_ Anya shrugs at Raven, her face stoic as she responds.

_“Oh my god, you guys are all assholes.”_

_“I wasn’t trying to hide anything from you Rae, I swear.”_

_“Bullshit.”_

_“No I mean it. I just…you come on a little bit strong. And you know that I’ve been working hard to win Lexa over. I didn’t want you to say something to scare her and ruin all of the progress that I’ve made.”_

_“I wouldn’t.”_

_“She’s right babe.”_

_“Fuck…okay, you are. But it was still a shitty thing to do Griffin.”_

_“We’re the world’s worst best friends.”_

_“Well, that’s what happens when you date and sleep with the same guy for an extended amount of time.”_ Raven plops back into the lovesac, cuddling into Anya’s side almost immediately. _“But if you don’t tell me as soon as you guys sleep together, I’ll fucking disown you.”_

_“I’m a lady Raven, I don’t kiss and tell.”_

_“Bullshit. I’ve heard about all of your sexcapades.”_

_“Only the ones that didn’t mean anything.”_

_“Spare me the gooey grossness. I just ate my weight in Chinese food and throwing up rice sucks ass. And I’m not asking for details. I just want to know when you butter her muffin.”_

_“Gross Rae. Shut up and watch the movie.”_

The group stops their incessant bickering to watch the movie. Lexa doesn’t particularly enjoy this one as much as the first. She’s not big on movies, but horror movies are definitely not something that she likes to endure. What she does enjoy is the way that Clarke cuddles into her when she gets scared. By the end of the movie, Clarke has nuzzled her face into Lexa’s neck to hide from the movie. She has shifted her body so that her whole body is laid across Lexa’s lap. The warmth of Clarke’s body across hers is making Lexa’s eyes heavy with drowsiness. That mixed with the high emotions of the day make her body start to drift off to dreamland.

She doesn’t know how much later it is when she feels Raven’s hand and voice softly bring her back into a sleepy wakefulness. Clarke is still splayed out across her lap, snoring softly against Lexa’s collarbones. She slowly rouses the blonde from her slumber. When unfocused blue eyes gaze up at her, Lexa feels her heart kick up an unsteady beat against her ribcage. In the game of falling in love, that moment makes Lexa stumble once again, pulling her that much closer to losing. Not that this is a game that she minds losing. It’s a win-win either way. She smiles softly at Clarke’s sleepy face, getting a lazy grin back from her.

_“Come on you, let’s go lay down.”_

**TBC**  

 

 

 

**Translations:**

**Shof op Onya.** _= Shut up Anya._

**Ai hod yu in, Reivon.** _= I love you, Raven._

**Hodnes laik kwelnes, Linkon. Yu get in disha.** = Love is weakness, Lincoln. You know this.

 **Dula op yu wich in bilaik, Heda? Ai wich in bilaik hodess laik uf, nou kwelnes**. = Do you believe that, Commander? I believe that love is strength, not weakness.

 **Ai fir raun Linkon.** = I’m afraid, Lincoln.

 **Kiken raun bilaik mou kom jos kiken thru, Heda.** = Life is about more than just surviving, Commander.

 **Ait. Ai hon in yu.** = Alright. I get you.

 **Chek ai au, Leksa. Ro ai ridiyo op.** = Look at me, Lexa. Speak true.

 **Dula op yu hod in Klark?** = Do you love Clarke?

 **Ai dula op nou get in.** = I do not know.

 **Shof op** = Shut up.

 **Chil au Reivon** = Calm down Raven.

 


	13. Wildly Fluttering Pulse Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -Bellamy and Echo come to town.
> 
> -Things with the girls heat up.
> 
> -Um yeah, other things happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*~*~*~*~*
> 
> A/N: Alright beautiful people. Here it is…..the next update. Sorry that this has taken me so long. I took a small vacation to go see my family. Also, my dad’s been sick, so I haven’t been in the greatest headspace for writing. But the wait is over. I hope that you guys enjoy this, actually I am pretty sure that you will.
> 
> Let me know what you think. Drop me a comment, a review, a kudo, or a bookmark….or you can come yell at me on Tumblr. Whatever you want.
> 
> Shout out to the yin to my yang Randomme103. She knows that she did….*nothing* :D
> 
> Thank you guys for all of your support with this story. I don't say it enough but I really appreciate all of you.
> 
> ~*~*~*~*~*

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Barista’s Choice**

**~*~*~*~*~***

 

**Chapter 12**

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“So when is Bell supposed to get here?”_ Clarke’s question snaps Octavia out of her daze. She looks up from her phone to glance at her best friend. Clarke is pulling on a pair of black skinny jeans, checking out her reflection in the full length mirror on Octavia’s closet door. _“These jeans make my ass look fantastic.”_

_“He left this morning. Assuming that he doesn’t have to stop more than once, he and Echo should be here in like an hour or so. Also, those jeans do make your ass look really good.”_

_“Awesome. I can’t wait to meet this girl. After all, it’s our job to make sure that she’s good enough for Bellamy. Where did you find these jeans anyway?”_

_“I’m sure that if Bell picked her, she’s going to be perfect for him.”_ Octavia types something into her phone quickly before turning her attention back to Clarke. Her best friend is lifting her left leg up and down, effectively testing her mobility while wearing the jeans. Octavia has to take a second to appreciate how good Clarke looks in them. She’s very confident in her sexuality, but those jeans almost look like they’ve been painted onto Clarke’s legs. _“I found the jeans at that new clothing store in the mall. I thought that you’d like them. I didn’t know that you were going to look so hot while wearing them.”_

_“Sorry O, this ass is spoken for. Plus I don’t think that Lincoln would be very keen on the idea of swinging.”_

_“I don’t know. What guy doesn’t want to have a threesome with two hot girls?”_

_“That’s a very accurate statement.”_

_“I know. I mean, if I were ever going to have a three way, I would definitely want it to be with another chick.”_

_“Same. I definitely wouldn’t be okay with having more than one dude involved if anything.”_

_“Too much dick is definitely not a good thing.”_

_“So true.”_

_“It’s funny though.”_

_“What is?”_ Clarke looks up from her self-ogling in the mirror, meeting Octavia’s eyes.

_“Please don’t take this the wrong way.”_

_“What are you talking about?”_

_“It’s just; I always thought that you and Bell would end up together.”_

_“Why?”_

_“I don’t know. You guys were so close when we were growing up. I guess that I thought you’d eventually get together.”_

_“Ew. O, that would be like dating my brother.”_

_“I know. It’s stupid. I feel like Bell’s always had a thing for you.”_

_“It’s not stupid, O. I get it, I totally do.”_ Clarke moves over to Octavia’s bed, plopping down next to her best friend with a sigh. _“I’ve just never had a thing for him. He’s always been more like a sibling to me.”_

_“Yeah, and now you have Lexa. Even if Bell wasn’t getting married, he would never stand a chance against her.”_

_“Really, O?”_

_“What? I’m just saying. That girl has got it going on.”_

_“Don’t I know it?”_

_“I am still so surprised that you haven’t managed to sleep with her yet.”_

_“God! Is that all you think about? Threesomes and my sex life.”_

_“Well, I mean. When is the last time that you had sex?”_

_“With or without another person?”_

_“Both.”_

_“With another person was like a week before I met Lexa.”_

_“With who?”_ Octavia’s eyebrows practically disappear into her hairline in surprise. She knew that Clarke hadn’t been completely celibate since her breakup with Finn, but she assumed that her best friend was opting for ‘alone time’ rather than hooking up with a random person.

 _“Um, Harper.”_ Clarke bites down on her lip as she mumbles out her answer.

_“What? Are you serious?”_

_“Yup.”_ Clarke releases her bottom lip, her teeth causing the ‘p’ to make a popping sound.

_“How long have you and Harper been hooking up?”_

_“On and off since I broke up with Finn.”_

_“You’ve been sleeping with her for almost two years? Why didn’t I know about this?”_

_“I didn’t think that it was something that I needed to announce. Like, hey O. I’ve been sleeping with one of our coworkers for almost two years now. But it’s not a big deal. What we have is purely sexual.”_

_“I can’t believe that you didn’t tell me.”_

_“I’m sorry. I didn’t think that it was such a big deal that you knew. And it’s not happening anymore.”_

_“Only because you’re completely smitten with Lexa.”_

_“I am. You’re totally right.”_

_“You’re such a dirty slut. I can’t believe that you kept that from me.”_

_“I really am sorry.”_

_“It’s fine. I’m just surprised.”_

_“Why?”_

_“I always thought that Harper was straight.”_

_“Well, she doesn’t really label herself. Not that it really matters.”_

_“I know. I’m just saying. I’ve like never heard her talk about girls.”_

_“Hmm, I dunno. We don’t really talk much when we’re together.”_

_“Clarke! You dog!”_ Octavia laughs boisterously, nudging her shoulder against her best friend’s.

_“What? It’s true.”_

_“Wait a second. Where did you guys hook up? I know that Raven would’ve said something if you were bringing her back to your dorm. And as far as I know, Harper lives with her mom.”_

_“Yeah, she does. And I most definitely didn’t take her to my dorm to subject her to ridicule from Raven.”_

_“So where did you guys…”_ Octavia’s eyes widen in surprise as realization hits her like a freight train. _“Are you fucking kidding me?!”_

_“Not kidding.”_

_“Jesus Clarke, do you have a death wish or something? Indra would murder you two if she found out that you were having sex at the café.”_

_“I know that. It’s not like we had sex when other people were working. And it was always when the café was closed.”_

_“Please tell me that you guys didn’t have sex on the counter.”_

_“No way. That would be like having sex in public with all of the windows.”_

_“So where’d you guys bang?”_

_“Oh my god Octavia. Do you really need to know?”_

_“Yes. I need to know if I am touching something that your vagina has been in contact with.”_

_“Dude! If you really have to know, we usually hooked up in the room that Indra made into a breakroom. Or her office because there is a couch.”_

_“You what?! You’ve finger banged Harper on Indra’s couch?”_

_“Finger banged. That is such a Raven thing to say.”_

_“Well, that is essentially what you are doing. Finger bang. Pounding the cake. Scissoring the snatch.”_

_“Okay, I’m going to need you to stop talking immediately.”_

_“Why? Can’t handle being made fun of? Because let me tell you, I won’t be forgetting this anytime soon. Prepare to pick up my shifts whenever I need you to, lest I let Indra know about you and Harper’s dalliances.”_

_“You’re an asshole.”_

_“I love you too.”_

_“But that’s not why I need this conversation to stop.”_

_“So what’s the problem Princess?”_

_“Look. I haven’t had the touch of another for months. I know that it’s not Lexa’s fault and I’ve been patient. But I’m fucking losing my mind with how sex deprived I am.”_

_“I’m sorry.”_

_“No you’re not. You get laid on the regular. Do you know what it’s like to literally only be able to fuck yourself? I’m guessing that the answer to that is no. So please, I beg of you…can we stop talking about sex?”_

Octavia holds her hands up in surrender at Clarke’s pleading words. _“Fine, fine. I’m done. I promise. But seriously. You need to get laid.”_

_“Goddamnit! I know that.”_

_“So do something about it.”_

_“What are you two idiots yelling about?”_

_“BELL!”_ Octavia is on her feet quickly, flying across the room in a flash of brown hair. She lets out a loud squeal as she jumps into her big brother’s arms. Bellamy lets out a small grunt as the force of the hug sends them stumbling into Octavia’s door.

 _“Hey O.”_ Bellamy’s gaze flits over to where Clarke is still seated on the bed, his eyes crinkle as he grins at the blonde. _“Hey Princess.”_

 _“Hey Bell.”_ Clarke gets to her feet and makes her way over to the siblings. Octavia has relinquished her hold on her brother by the time Clarke walks up. Bellamy scoops Clarke up in his arms, lifting her up into a tight hug. She lets out a sigh of contentment as she breathes in the smell that she associates with home. He lets out a husky chuckle as his arms wrap tighten around Clarke’s waist.

_“Missed ya Princess.”_

_“Me too Bell, me too.”_

_“So, where’s the fiancée at Bells? Did she come to her senses and dump you on the car trip over?”_

_“No you asshole. She’s in the car. I thought that we could go out to lunch so you guys can get to know each other.”_

_“Yasss, but you’re buying Mr. Big Shot.”_

_“Of course, you two never pay for anything.”_

_“You’re the big brother. Gotta take care of us youngins.”_

_“You guys are two years younger than I am.”_

_“Yeah, but you have way more money than either one of us.”_

_“Not really.”_

_“Please Bell. You have a career, one that you’ve had since you were eighteen.”_

_“Yeah, I also have an almost ten thousand dollar wedding that I am about to pay for.”_

_“Too bad big bro. You’re paying for breakfast.”_

_“You mean lunch.”_

_“Yeah, whatever. Clarke and I just woke up like thirty minutes ago. So it’s breakfast for us.”_

_“Alright. Let’s go. Freeloaders.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Okay, so, you and Clarke are going to be leaving when?”_ Anya questions from her spot on the couch, where she is cuddled against Raven’s side, whose attention is focused on the textbook in her lap. Lexa is standing in the kitchen of the apartment, chugging down a bottle of water. Sweat is still glistening on her skin from her habitual morning run. She pulls the water bottle away from her mouth with a gasp, coughing lightly before answering.

 _“I think that she said that she wanted to leave on Tuesday of next week. The wedding is next Friday. I don’t think that she wants to spend much time in San Diego because she doesn’t want to be around her mom. And after that phone call, I can’t say that I blame her.”_ Lexa finishes off the bottle of water and tosses the empty plastic into the recycle bin. _“I just need to figure out how to make the most out of the short amount of time that we have, seeing as we’ve never been through California before.”_

 _“Wait. What?!”_ Raven’s head snaps up from her textbook, eyes widened in shock. _“What did you just say?”_

_“I, um….We’ve never been through California. We didn’t really stop to do any sight-seeing when we moved down here. And we haven’t really had any time since we started school.”_

_“So you’re telling me that you guys have never road tripped through Cali?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Oh my fucking god dude. That has to be illegal or something.”_ Raven unceremoniously tosses the book onto the floor, snatching her cell phone off of the table.

**_Rae Bae: S.O.S!!!_ **

**_Princess Griffers: What’s going on babe?_ **

**_O-Face: This better be important. I was just embarrassing Bell in front of the fiancée._ **

**_Rae Bae: Bell’s here? And you guys didn’t tell me? Assholes._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Sorry Rae, he just kind of showed up at O’s dorm and demanded that we go out for food._ **

**_O-Face: Yeah. We were forced._ **

**_Rae Bae: First off, fuck you guys. Secondly, I know that you’re both lying. O probably forced him to take you guys out._ **

**_O-Face: I did no such thing. It really was his idea._ **

**_-Bells has been added to the conversation._ **

**_Bells: Why are you guys messaging me from across the table?_ **

**_Princess Griffers: Shush Bell. Tell Raven that it was your idea to take us out for lunch._ **

**_Bells: It was my idea to take them out Raven._ **

**_Rae Bae: You owe me dinner, fucker!_ **

**_Bells: Wow! How can I say no when you’ve asked so nicely._ **

**_Rae Bae: Shut up. Okay, this was so not the point of this group message._ **

**_O-Face: You’re the one that went all period Raven when we talked about food._ **

**_Rae Bae: Okay, fuck off O._ **

**_O-Face: Only if you help ;)_ **

**_Rae Bae: Don’t flirt with me, I’m mad at you._ **

**_O-Face: Fine._ ** **_L What did you message us for?_ **

**_Rae Bae: I am sitting here with Ahn and Lex. And come to find out, neither of them has been on a road trip through Cali._ **

**_O-Face: What?!?!_ **

**_Princess Griffers: Yeah, Lexa and I have already discussed that._ **

**_Rae Bae: Well, that is just not okay. SO here’s what I’m thinking. You two need to leave earlier. More road trip time before you get to SD._ **

**_Princess Griffers: I don’t really have the money to take her on a fancy road trip. Unless I don’t want to pay for school next semester._ **

**_Bells: I don’t really know why I’m still part of this conversation but, we can all help you out with fundage Princess._ **

**_Rae Bae: Yasss!_ **

**_O-Face: Yeah, we can help out. Lincoln included._ **

**_Princess Griffers: No guys. I can’t ask you to do that._ **

**_Bells: Good thing that we didn’t ask you. Raven, send me your girlfriend’s address, I’m coming over after I drop these two idiots off._ **

**_O-Face: No way dude. We’re coming with._ **

**_Bells: But Clarke…._ **

**_O-Face: Will be completely distracted eye fucking Lexa while we discuss plans._ **

**_Princess Griffers: That’s just rude!_ **

**_Rae Bae: And 100 percent true babe._ **

**_O-Face: Don’t even try and deny it._ **

**_Bells: I’ve yet to meet this girl Clarke, but I’ve heard stories so I know that the girls are telling the truth ;)_ **

**_Princess Griffers: FUCK YOU GUYS!_ **

**_-Princess Griffers has left the conversation._ **

**_Rae Bae: Well, that was easier than I thought it was going to be._ **

**_O-Face: Rae, her face is so red right now. She’s super pissed. LOL!_ **

**_Bells: It’s true. If looks could kill, we’d all be dead right now._ **

**_Rae Bae: It’s not our fault. That girl is wound so tightly right now. She needs to get LAID ASAP._ **

**_O-Face: Agreed. She’s going to wait for Lexa to make the first move though._ **

**_Rae Bae: Princess Peach can’t take the twatblocking for much longer._ **

**_Bells: I have an idea. O, you said that Lexa gets like crazy jealous, right?_ **

**_O-Face: Yes. Clarke was kinda seeing this girl for a minute, trying to get over her feelings for Lexa. And one night Clarke and Lexa had a movie night. Clarke came home with a massive hickey. Turns out that she had taken a phone call from the girl she was dating while at the apartment. Lexa overheard and got super jelly, attacked her neck._ **

**_Bells: Jesus._ **

**_Rae Bae: The sexual tension between them is unbelievable. I seriously don’t know they’ve gone as long as they have without banging._ **

**_Bells: So here’s my idea._ **

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Clarke?”_

_“Yes?”_ Clarke looks up from her spot on her bed, where she is sketching yet another portrait of Lexa. The amount of sketches that she has of the brunette are borderline stalker, she’s filled up two sketch books now. Even in her almost twenty years of friendship with Octavia, she’s only drawn her best friend a handful of times. She never once sketched Finn while they were dating. So really, if that wasn’t the first clue to her being completely smitten with Lexa, she doesn’t know what is.

 _“Okay. So. I don’t really know how to say this,”_ Octavia plops down on Clarke’s bed with a sigh. Clarke takes a second to really look at her best friend. She looks like she hasn’t slept since Bellamy and Echo arrived in town two days ago. Her eyes are red rimmed and bloodshot, so Clarke knows that she’s been crying. Clarke sets her pencil down so that she can give Octavia her full attention, concern filling her body. _“So I’m just going to blurt it out.”_

_“Okay? Are you dying or something?”_

_“No. Shut up before I lose my nerve.”_

_“Sorry.”_

_“I’m late.”_

_“I mean, we didn’t really agree on a time for you to be here. And it’s not like we really have concrete plans. We’re just going to hang out with everybody at Anya and Lexa’s apartment.”_

_“No, I’m LATE.”_

_“Oh,”_ Clarke’s eyes widen in surprise, _“OH! Holy shit.”_

 _“Yeah.”_ Tears well in Octavia’s eyes and immediately begin to fall down her cheeks. She lets out a choked sob as she lies down on Clarke’s small bed. _“Fuck. What am I going to do, Clarke?”_

 _“Hey.”_ Clarke drops her sketchbook on the floor, maneuvering so that she can lie down next to Octavia. She wraps her arms around Octavia’s shoulders, pulling her best friend into a hug. Octavia drops her face into Clarke’s neck as sobs begin to overtake her body. Clarke can feel her own eyes prickle with tears as she feels tears moisten her shirt. She runs her hands up and down Octavia’s back in what she hopes is a soothing gesture. _“It could be nothing. How late are we talking here?”_

_“Ten days.”_

_“Ten days?!”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“It could still be nothing.”_

_“Do you really believe that?”_

_“Umm.”_

_“Fuck! What am I going to tell my parents? And Lincoln?”_

_“Whoa, hold up. Right now you don’t have to tell them anything. Not until you know for sure.”_

_“I’m like never late.”_

_“Yeah, I know, but there’s a first time for everything. You need to take a test.”_

_“I know that. I have a box in my purse. I’ve been avoiding it for two days now.”_

_“Okay, so no more avoidance. You need to go pee on one or all of those tests.”_

_“But I don’t wanna.”_

_“Well, you need to. Do you want me to have Raven come home so that she can be here too?”_

_“You don’t have to.”_

_“But do you want her here with us?”_

_“Kinda.”_

_“Okay.”_

Clarke fumbles blindly behind her to grab her cell phone off of the bedside table. She doesn’t want to let go of Octavia right now, so it takes her a few tries before she is able to locate the device. After cursing at the phone, she wraps her arm back around Octavia’s shoulders, peeking over her best friend’s head at the cursed device. She unlocks the screen and opens a new message to Raven.

**_BT Griffin: Rae, are you guys at the apartment?_ **

**_Rae Bae: Not right now. We went to go pick up booze and snacks. We should be on our way back shortly._ **

**_BT Griffin: Can you have Anya bring you by the dorm?_ **

**_Rae Bae: I guess so. I thought that O was picking you up._ **

**_BT Griffin: She’s here. We’re having a best friend emergency._ **

**_Rae Bae: On a scale of 1-10?_ **

**_BT Griffin: 15._ **

**_Rae Bae: Fuck. Okay, I’ll be there in like five minutes._ **

**_BT Griffin: Okay. Please come up to the room alone._ **

**_Rae Bae: Jesus, this must be a big emergency._ **

**_BT Griffin: It is. Possibly the biggest._ **

Clarke drops her phone on the bed without waiting for another response. She rests her chin on top of Octavia’s head as her best friend continues to cry on her shoulder.

_“She’ll be here in a few minutes, O.”_

_“Okay.”_

The two girls stay wrapped up on the bed together, Clarke just simply holding Octavia while listening to her cry. It’s only a few minutes later when she hears the front door to the dorm slam loudly against the wall as Raven barges into the room.

_“Where’s the fire?”_

_“No fire.”_

_“Why is O crying? Did somebody die?”_

_“No, dude.”_

_“Well, why are we panicking?”_

_“Grab the box out of O’s purse and bring it over here.”_

_“What box?”_

_“You’ll know.”_

_“You’re so fucking cryptic sometimes. Asshole.”_

_“Just shut up and do it.”_

_“Fine.”_ Raven walks over to the desk that she and Clarke share. Octavia’s purse is haphazardly tossed on top of the solid oak desk. Raven plunges her hand into the bag, blindly feeling around in the abyss that Octavia calls a purse. When she feels the shape of the box, she lets out a gasp as realization sets in. She doesn’t need to see the box to know what it is. “Fuck.” She curses under her breath as she pulls the box of pregnancy tests out of Octavia’s purse. She makes her way over to the bed without another word, her heart heavy with sympathy for her best friend. _“O…”_

_“Don’t say anything. Please Rae.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“It’s going to be okay regardless, you know that right?”_

_“I hope so.”_

_“No, it will be. We promise.”_ Clarke presses her lips against the top of Octavia’s head. _“No matter what happens, we’re here.”_

_“I know.”_

_“So, you ready?”_

_“Not at all.”_

_“Do you want us to go into the bathroom with you?”_

_“It’s fine. I’ve got it.”_ Octavia reluctantly pulls out of Clarke’s arms so that she can get to her feet. With a deep breath, she steels her nerves and grabs the box out of Raven’s hand. She doesn’t look at either girl as she walks into the small dorm bathroom, locking the door behind her. Clarke sits up on her bed, her fingers finding purchase in her blonde locks. She tugs almost painfully on her hair as she attempts to keep herself grounded.

_“Jesus Clarke. This is more like a twenty on the emergency scale.”_

_“I know.”_

_“How late is she?”_

_“Ten days.”_

_“Fuck, she’s probably knocked up.”_

_“Probably.”_

_“Her eggo is preggo.”_

_“Rae! I get it.”_

_“Damn dude, I’m just playing.”_

_“I know, but I’m just so fucking nervous.”_

_“Don’t be. It’s not your uterus that is harboring a parasite.”_

_“That sounds disgusting.”_

_“What about pregnancy isn’t disgusting?”_

_“Are you telling me that you don’t want to have kids?”_

_“Ew, no. I’m good with being the cool aunt and shit. But I am not going to have my vagina ruined by snot nosed ankle-biters.”_

_“I want some kids. Maybe not now, but one day.”_

_“Dude, you and Lexa would have some fucking gorgeous kids.”_

_“Oh my god Rae. I haven’t even managed to have sex with her and you’re talking about kids?”_

_“Well, yeah. I’m just making an observation.”_

_“Plus we’re kind of missing the means to impregnate each other.”_

_“I’m sure that they’ve figured out a way for two girls to make a baby.”_

_“Rae. You are literally a mechanical genius. I shouldn’t have to explain to you how to make a baby.”_

_“Shut up dude, I’m one thousand percent sure that it’s possible. You should know, Dr. Griffin.”_

_“I’m not Dr. Griffin. That’s Abby’s title.”_

_“Yeah, but you went through enough premed training to learn about sex right?”_

_“Why are we even having this discussion?”_

_“I was just making a point about how you and Lexa should make some babies.”_

_“Oh my god Rae.”_

They are broken out of their frivolous argument at the sound of the bathroom door opening. Octavia walks out of the bathroom, completely stone-faced. Clarke knows better. She can see the panic swirling in Octavia’s eyes. She knows without any verbal confirmation. Raven was right, indeed.

Octavia is with child.

_“All three?”_

_“Yup.”_ Octavia squeaks as she holds up one of the tests, the word _‘pregnant’_ clearly visible on the display screen.

_“Fuck.”_

_“YEP.”_

_“It’s going to be okay.”_

_“I’m not even twenty two yet. I’m not ready for a kid. I haven’t even finished school. I work at a fucking café. What the fuck am I going to do guys?”_

_“O.”_

_“Lincoln is going to freak out. He’s going to break up with me. My mom…oh my god, what the hell am I going to tell my mom?”_

_“O.”_

_“My dad is going to kill Lincoln. And then he’s going to kill me. And Bellamy……”_

_“O!”_ Clarke reaches her hand out and smacks Octavia in the face. Not hard enough to hurt her best friend, but enough to ground her to the present. Octavia meets Clarke’s gaze, her eyes widened in shock. _“Snap the fuck out of it!”_

_“You slapped me!”_

_“You were panicking. I need you to be calm.”_

_“Well, I’m sorry. I just found out that I am knocked the fuck up. I think that I’m allowed to freak out a little bit.”_

_“Yeah, Clarke’s right though. Panicking isn’t going to make you less pregnant.”_

_“Fuck you Raven.”_

_“No thanks dude. I don’t want to catch the pregnancy.”_

_“You’re such an asshole.”_

_“Okay. Fighting isn’t going to get us anywhere. We need to calm down and talk about this.”_

_“There’s nothing to talk about. I need to go talk to Lincoln.”_

_“Are you going to keep it?”_

_“Of course I am. That would never be an option.”_

_“Well. I don’t really think that you have anything to worry about. Lincoln loves you; he’s not going to leave you when you tell him. Your parents might freak a little bit, but it’s not like you’re a teenager. You’re in a committed relationship and you have been since you were sixteen. You guys will figure it out.”_

_“You think so?”_

_“I know so babe. You are going to be an awesome mom.”_

_“Clarke’s right O. You can do this.”_

_“I love you guys.”_

_“We love you too. We’ll be with you the whole time.” Clarke nods her head in agreement at Raven’s statement._

_“What am I going to tell Lincoln?”_

_“The truth would probably be a good start.”_

_“Preach sister.”_ Raven’s attention is on her phone as she types something out. When she is done, she looks back up at Octavia with a sheepish smile. _“Sorry.”_

_“But what if he leaves?”_

_“He won’t leave you.”_

_“You can’t be sure of that Clarke.”_

_“I’m pretty positive that he won’t. I’ve known him as long as you have. He’s a great guy and he will step to the plate. And in the rare chance that I’m wrong, Raven and I will be here.”_

_“Fuck. I…I’m going to be a mom.”_

_“You’re totally a MILF.”_

_“Shut up Raven.”_

_“Whatever dude. It’s a compliment.”_

_“I thought that you didn’t want to catch the pregnancy?”_

_“Yeah, well you’re not a mom yet. We will wait until after Raven Junior is born.”_

_“I am not naming my child Raven Junior.”_

_“Hmmp…you should. I’m fucking awesome.”_

_“And so humble too.”_

_“Yeah, yeah. You don’t have to be humble when it’s the truth.”_

_“I don’t like you.”_

_“I love you too Octavia. Now we should probably head out before Anya and Lexa come up here.”_

_“What? They’re still here?”_

_“Yes. I didn’t know how long this emergency was going to take, so I just told them to wait in the car.”_

_“You gotta promise me that you won’t tell them.”_

_“What? Why aren’t you going to tell them? They’re your friends too.”_

_“I know that Rae. I just think that maybe I should tell Lincoln first seeing as he deposited the parasite into my uterus.”_

_“Gross dude.”_

_“Oh sure, when I try to be funny like you, it’s gross.”_

_“I’m just sayin.’ Clarke and I definitely don’t want to know about your boyfriend’s super swimmers.”_

_“I can’t with you two anymore.”_ Clarke turns to face Octavia, concern written across her face. _“Are you still okay with a group hang out? Because if you’re not, I’ll stay home with you.”_

_“No, it’s fine.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Yeah. It might be a good idea. Keep my mind off of everything. At least for a few hours, ya know?”_

_“I get it.”_ Clarke’s fingers intertwine with Octavia’s, squeezing them comfortingly. _“Let’s go have some fun, shall we?”_

_“Yasss Queen.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Okay. So the black card is, ‘Why do I hurt all over?’ Dammit! I hate being the card czar. I have the perfect white card for this.”_ Raven slams the black card on the table unceremoniously, slumping into the couch with a huff. Clarke can’t help but laugh at Raven’s childish behavior. She takes a quick glance through her white cards, trying to figure out what to play. She’s got almost everybody in the room figured out, so she knows what to play in order to win.

That’s Clarke’s biggest weakness. She is extremely competitive and she absolutely hates to lose.

She’d be winning, if it weren’t for her inability to read Lexa’s preference when she is the card czar. She even has Echo figured out by now. For some reason though, she cannot get a read on Lexa. Sometimes she picks the most vulgar answer as the winner, and sometimes she picks the most logical. It’s driving her crazy.

Because of this most frustrating roadblock, Anya is currently in first place. She has successfully managed to snatch up the black card every single time that Lexa has been czar.

Clarke lets out an exasperated sigh before placing her card face down on the table. She picks up another white card to replace it, barely managing to suppress her laugh as she reads the card, _‘A bigger, blacker dick,’_ her favorite card aside from the one that she just played. She glances around the room, watching her opponents as they choose their cards.

Just as Raven is grabbing the stack of while cards off of the table, a soft knock comes from the front door. Octavia excuses herself to get up and answer the door. Clarke doesn’t pay her best friend any mind, unable to focus on anything but the game in front of her. She wants this black card so badly that she can taste it. Clarke briefly looks up from the table as Octavia makes her way back over to her seat, settling in next to Lincoln on the floor. She isn’t able to fight back the gasp as she sees Harper sit down next to O. She curses internally as the other girl meets her eyes, smiling softly at her. She returns the smile, but she’s pretty sure that it comes out resembling a pained grimace.

Clarke definitely didn’t expect her sometimes fling to show up at her current ‘love interest’s’ apartment. She can feel her palms begin to sweat, and for some reason, she isn’t able to tear her eyes away from Harper, who is returning her gaze.

Her creepy stare-down is broken when Raven’s shoulder slams into hers.

_“Ow! What the hell Rae?”_

_“Sorry. I have been trying to get your attention, but you’ve been locking eyes with new girl over there. And it’s making me uncomfortable. Plus I picked your card, asshole.”_

_“How’d you know it was my card?”_

_“Puh-lease. We’ve had this game since freshmen year and you are the only person that ever draws ‘coat hanger abortions.’ I feel like you have a magnet attached to that card that only you can activate.”_

_“What? That doesn’t even make any sense.”_

_“Rae’s right Clarke. I’m pretty sure that you’re the only one that ever gets that card.”_

_“No. I distinctively remember Lincoln playing that card once.”_

_“That doesn’t count. It was in your hand. He played it for you while you were going pee.”_

_“Oh yeah.”_

_“See? Cards against humanity sorcery is what that is.”_

_“You’re just jealous of my mad skills.”_

_“Fuck off. At least you can’t win the next round, card czar. O, will you deal the new girl in?”_

_“Her name’s Harper.”_

_“I know. She works at Grounder’s with you and C. She’s Clarke’s bang bro.”_

_“Raven!”_ Clarke’s eyes widen almost comically. She is on her feet in a flash, moving quickly out of the living room. Raven gets up off of the couch with a grunt of pain, her knee locking up because of the quick movement. She moves as fast as she can behind Clarke, limping slightly along the way. Clarke whips around to face Raven as they enter the kitchen, fury burning in her blue eyes. _“What the hell dude!”_

_“What?”_

_“Are you trying to ruin everything?”_

_“What did I say?”_

_“Clarke’s bang bro? Really?!”_ Clarke grabs the bottle of vodka that is sitting on the kitchen counter. She doesn’t bother with a shot glass, just taking a generous gulp out of the bottle. The slightly warm liquid burns on the way down, making her let out a pained groan. She takes another drink before setting the bottle down on the counter harshly, relishing in the loud clank that the glass makes against the tile. _“Like seriously…how’d you even know about Harper and I?”_

_“I um, maybe walked in on you guys once at the café.”_

_“What?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“No way. Not possible. We were always so careful.”_

_“Yeah, until you weren’t. All I know is that one of y’all didn’t lock the door. I came to bring you dinner and ended up walking in on you, already feasting on your co-worker.”_

_"Okay, gross. You make it sound so dirty.”_

_“I mean, it was pretty dirty. You were going to pound town on that poor girl.”_

_“Raven! Jesus!”_ Clarke feels her face heat up in a wicked blush at her best friend’s crass words. She rubs her hands up and down her face slowly, feeling her body set in with unexpected fatigue.

_“Dude, no need to be so shy about it. You apparently like to give it rough. She definitely wasn’t complaining. I have to admit, it was pretty hot.”_

_“Okay. We aren’t having this conversation right now. Nope, not a chance in hell.”_

_“You’re no fun.”_

_“Oh I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that in order to be fun, I had to let my best friend give me shit about the girl that I was sleeping with.”_

_“I’m not giving you shit. All I said was that it was hot. That’s the truth. I mean, you’re my best friend Clarke, but I have eyes. You’re hot and so is Harper. I mean, she’s got nothing on Lexa, but if I wasn’t committed, I’d hit it.”_

_“Well, I’m glad that you think so. I’m completely mortified that you saw me in such a compromising position, but thanks for the compliment, I guess.”_

_“Please. I’ve seen you naked many times before.”_

_“Yeah, but not while in the middle of the act.”_

_“It’s whatever, dude. Seriously, it’s not a big deal.”_

_“Why didn’t you say anything?”_

_“Cause that wouldn’t’ve made things worse. You would have freaked the fuck out.”_

_“You’re right.”_

_“I know. Look, the moral of this story is, you need to go to pound town with somebody.”_

_“Oh my god, stop. Holy shit, is that why you guys invited her over?”_

_“Um, no. I mean that would be a brilliant idea. But I guess that Bellamy is friends with her older sister. They went to boot camp together or some shit like that. So I guess that Harper’s been having a hard time with her sister being gone. Bell decided that he would take her under his wing and look out for her until her sister gets to take leave and come home.”_

_“That’s really sweet.”_

_“I know. Bell can be a good guy when he wants to be. Also, I’m pretty sure that Harper would be down for some lady lovin’ if you offered. It might help.”_

Both girls jump as a crash echoes from behind them. They turn to face a flustered Lexa, who immediately grabs at a roll of paper towels to clean up the soda that she dropped on the floor.

_“Shit, sorry.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa wasn’t sure about this new girl being a part of their group. Sure, Bellamy and Echo were new to her, but they were friends by association.

Normally, Lexa wouldn’t be so standoffish about a new person hanging out with them, but there was just something about Harper that she didn’t like.

Maybe it was the way that she was looking at Clarke like she wanted to eat her, in every sense of the word. Who was she kidding, it was for that reason.

Lexa was jealous, again.

She runs the palm of her hand against her forehead, sighing tiredly. Even when she was with Costia, she was always the rational one. Jealousy wasn’t even a fleeting thought in her mind when her girlfriend was still alive. Costia on the other hand, was easy to question Lexa’s fidelity on a near constant basis. If another girl even looked at Lexa, Costia would go off the deep end. They had more arguments where Costia would accuse Lexa of being unfaithful than Lexa could even count. It’s funny how Costia turned out to be the one that was sleeping around.

She’s not sure how she feels about the tables being turned against her. Being the jealous one is unsettling to the brunette.

So when Raven casually mentions that Clarke and Harper are friends with benefits, Lexa feels her heart drop into her stomach. She’s not sure that it’s true, until she sees the look on Clarke’s face.

When Clarke leaves the living room, Lexa’s eyes follow her. She wants so badly to follow the blonde, but why? What is she going to say? Hey Clarke, I’m sorry that Raven upset you? By the way, are you still sleeping with Harper? Not that it’s any of my business, but I just wanted to know.’

**_‘Yeah, real smooth Lexa. Way to be a jackass. She’s not your girlfriend.’_ **

She’s only half paying attention as she makes her way into the kitchen, intent on making herself a more adult beverage. Her ears on the other hand, are one hundred percent alert as she is assaulted by Clarke and Raven’s conversation.

_“Please. I’ve seen you naked many times before.”_

She definitely likes the idea of Clarke being naked. Her traitor body likes it more than is probably appropriate at the moment.

_“Yeah, but not while in the middle of the act.”_

_“It’s whatever, dude. Seriously, it’s not a big deal.”_

_“Why didn’t you say anything?”_

_“Cause that wouldn’t’ve made things worse. You would have freaked the fuck out.”_

_“You’re right.”_

_“I know. Look, the moral of this story is, you need to go to pound town with somebody.”_

Lexa groans internally at her overactive libido. The jolt of arousal that floods her body makes her feel warm. Almost too warm. Her clothes begin to feel too tight against her flushed skin.

**_‘Dammit Lexa. Now is not the time to act like a sex crazed teenager.’_ **

_“Oh my god, stop. Holy shit, is that why you guys invited her over?”_

_“Um, no. I mean that would be a brilliant idea. But I guess that Bellamy is friends with her older sister. They went to boot camp together or some shit like that. So I guess that Harper’s been having a hard time with her sister being gone. Bell decided that he would take her under his wing and look out for her until her sister gets to take leave and come home.”_

_“That’s really sweet.”_

_“I know. Bell can be a good guy when he wants to be. Also, I’m pretty sure that Harper would be down for some lady lovin’ if you offered. It might help.”_

That simple statement is enough to make the jealousy bug bite Lexa right on the ass. Unfortunately, she was not prepared for the onslaught of jealousy to be so staggering and it makes her drop her cup of mountain dew on the floor with a loud gasp.

Her jealousy is quickly replaced with mortification at being caught eavesdropping on a conversation, and making a mess in her kitchen. She blindly grabs for the roll of paper towels that she meticulously keeps stocked on the counter. She pulls a ridiculously large amount of them off of the roll, blurting out a hurried _‘Shit, sorry’_ as she drops to her knees to clean up the mess.

 _“I gotta pee,”_ is all she hears from Clarke before the blonde flees the kitchen in what Lexa assumes is mortification. For a brief moment, Lexa is hopeful that Raven left with the blonde, so that she doesn’t have to face the embarrassment of what just transpired. Unfortunately, Lexa is never that lucky in life. It takes another minute for Raven to get bored of the silence and clear her throat to get Lexa’s attention.

_“You alright Lex?”_

_“Yeah, I’m good Raven.”_

_“You sure?”_

_“Yes?”_

_“Okay, so why won’t you look at me?”_

Lexa looks up from her spot on the floor to meet the very amused gaze of one Raven Reyes. Right now Lexa wants nothing more than to slap the smirk off of Raven’s face.

 _“What do you want,”_ Lexa croaks as she continues to wipe at the clean floor with the soaked paper towels.

_“How much of that did you hear?”_

_“Enough.”_

_“Enough of what?”_

_“Are they still sleeping together?”_

_“Why?”_

_“Are they?”_

_“I’m not sure that I’m the person that you should be asking Lexa.”_

_“Please Raven.”_ Lexa pleads with the brunette as she gets to her feet. _“I just…need to know.”_

_“No. They’re not sleeping together anymore.”_

_“Oh, okay.”_ Lexa tries to keep her voice calm, but she’s screaming internally in relief.

_“Seriously Lexa. Just stop pussy footing around. Go get your girl. She stopped sleeping with Harper after she met you.”_

_“What?”_

_“Yeah. From the first moment that she saw you come into the café, she was completely smitten. She broke her little  sex-rangement with Harper and focused all her attention on you. Even after you shut her down, she still held onto hope that you would change your mind.”_

_“Please don’t remind me about how big of an idiot I’ve been.”_

_“You haven’t been an idiot Lex.”_ Raven laughs incredulously at her statement. _“Okay, yes you have been. But so has Clarke. The two of you are so fucking frustrating that sometimes I want to tit punch both of you.”_

_“That’s just rude. You shouldn’t abuse the girls.”_

_“Whatever. I’m just telling you that you haven’t been alone in your idiocy. Both of you are idiots…but I’m glad that you are finally figuring things out. It’s really cute actually to see you get so jealous over something as frivolous as an ex-fuck buddy.”_

_“I’m not jealous.”_

_“Oh honey, yes you are.”_

_“Ugh, what do I do?”_

_“Go get her. She’s probably in the bathroom, hiding from me.”_

_“And say what?”_

_“Well if it were me, I’d say, ‘Hey Clarke, sorry for interrupting your conversation with Raven. I overheard everything and it made me drop my soda because I am super jealous that you finger banged Harper. So I think that you should finger bang me…’”_

_“Yeah, I don’t think that I’m going to say that.”_

_“Hmmp, your loss. Clarke would probably like it. Seriously though, will you go make sure that she’s okay?”_

_“Why me? You’re the one that embarrassed her.”_

_“Yeah, but you’re going to be the one to fix it.”_

_“I don’t know what you want me to do.”_

_“Like I said, go check on her.”_

_“Fine.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

If Lexa thought that her unprecedented amount of jealousy was at an all-time high, she was in for a real treat. As soon as she knocked on the bathroom door, the current bane of her existence opened the door to greet her.

 _“Sorry. I was looking for Clarke,”_ she fumbles awkwardly over her words, feeling her face heat up in a blush. _“I didn’t mean to bother you.”_

 _“You didn’t. Clarke’s in here.”_ Harper replies with a grin. _“She’s preoccupied at the moment.”_

 _“Oh, well, I’ll just…”_ Lexa turns to leave, feeling her eyes burn with tears. She knows that she is being petty, but right now she doesn’t care. Clarke’s soft voice stops her inner dialogue before she has the chance to walk away.

_“Lexie, are you alright?”_

_“Yeah, I’m good. Raven just asked me to check on you.”_ Lexa’s body subconsciously turns to face Clarke at the sound of her sweet voice. She is barely able to contain the startled gasp as she takes in Clarke’s current state of dress. Well, her state of undress really. Clarke is currently standing topless in front of Lexa. Her ample chest is covered only by a lacy blue bra. Lexa swallows thickly in an attempt to muster up some moisture in her now very dry mouth. She can’t stop her eyes from lingering on Clarke’s half covered chest, no matter how pervy that may make her seem. _“Sorry. I didn’t that you were busy. I’m just going to go take a nap.”_

_“What? I’m not busy. This asshole over here decided to spill the drink that she stole from Octavia on me. I don’t know what it is about being at your house and having drinks spilt on me.”_

_“Oh.”_ Lexa feels relief flood her body knowing that she didn’t walk in on Harper and Clarke hooking up. She is a little confused as to why Harper is in the bathroom with Clarke in the first place, but she ignores it. _“I can let you borrow a shirt, if you want.”_

_“Yeah, sure. Lead the way.”_

_“Okay. I’m not sure why you need me to take you to my room.”_

_“Just shut up and let’s go.”_

_“Alright.”_

Lexa grabs Clarke’s hand and interlocks their fingers. She pulls the blonde out of the bathroom, practically dragging her down the hall in her haste to get to her room. She definitely doesn’t want anybody else to see Clarke clad only in her bra. As soon as they are in the safety of her bedroom, Clarke shuts the door behind them.

Lexa is holding on to her last bit of restraint when it comes to Clarke. She’s stuck at a crossroads right now, trying to pick which direction to go. She cares about Clarke so she wants to take things slow and do everything right. On the other hand, she wants nothing more than to throw caution to the wind and give into her more carnal desires.

When she turns around to look at Clarke, that tightly coiled spring holding her desire at bay tightens impossibly more, threatening to snap at any given second. Her eyes trail down Clarke’s torso, mapping each inch of the pale skin to her memory. When she reluctantly lifts her eyes to meet Clarke’s baby blues, she has to suck in a deep breath to cover up her gasp.

Clarke’s eyes are hungrily roaming her body. The blonde’s pupils are blown with desire, her bottom lip being worried between her teeth. When she releases her lip, an audible ‘pop’ can be heard through the silent room.

 _“I’m sorry.”_ Clarke’s voice is low, raspy, and oh so sexy in this moment. The smoky way that her voice curls around the words turns Lexa on more than she knew was possible.

 _“For what?”_ Her voice cracks as she speaks, making her sound like a prepubescent teenage boy. Which isn’t too far from the truth, considering her current ogling of the blonde.

_“For what Raven said.”_

_“Oh, it’s fine.”_

_“It’s not though.”_

_“It’s not really any of my business what you do Clarke.”_

_“I know that, but I still feel like what she said was kind of uncalled for.”_

_“And I appreciate that. If you want to sleep with Harper, it’s not my place to say anything about it.”_

_“So you don’t care if I go back in the bathroom and let her fuck me senseless?”_

_“If that’s what you want.”_ The way that Lexa’s jaw clenches as she answers lets Clarke know that she is lying.

Clarke’s eyes narrow in suspicion. She wants nothing more than to make Lexa lose control. And judging by the way that Lexa is looking at her right now, she’s close to her breaking point. So she decides to push her just a little bit more and hope for the best. _“Okay. I mean she is pretty phenomenal in bed. Probably the best that I’ve ever had. The things that girl can do with her tongue. WHOO!!!” Clarke dramatically fans her face with her hand. “And her fingers…”_

Lexa surges forward without a second thought, cutting off Clarke’s statement as she smashes their lips together. She swallows Clarke’s startled gasp as she presses the blonde against her bedroom door.

Lexa trails a hand up Clarke’s thigh, her nails scratching bluntly against the denim. She hooks her fingers underneath Clarke’s knee and hoists the blonde’s leg up so that she can wrap it around her waist. Clarke’s hips inadvertently cant into Lexa’s, coaxing a groan out of the brunette. The groan allows Clarke to slip her tongue into Lexa’s mouth. She can’t stop her hips from moving again as she battles Lexa for dominance of the kiss.

Her mind is in such a lust induced haze that she doesn’t notice Lexa’s hips thrusting to meet hers. The way that their bodies are pressed against each other causes Lexa’s thigh to rub against Clarke’s jean clad center. She pulls away from Lexa’s mouth with a gasp, panting harshly against the brunette’s lips.

 _“Wait, we need to stop…”_ Clarke pants out, even though the thought of stopping makes her want to die right now.

 _“No, I don’t want to stop.”_ Lexa accentuates her statement with another thrust of her hips, making Clarke’s head fall back against the door with a thud.

_“This isn’t going slow.”_

_“Fuck going slow.”_

_“But..I don’t…”_

Lexa’s eyes fall to rest on Clarke’s neck. She feels a surge of pride at the still present bruise on the fair skin. The vein in Clarke’s neck is thrumming rapidly, probably in time with her racing pulse. She scrapes her teeth across the bruise before latching on to nip and suck on the skin. Clarke lets out a hiss of pleasure as Lexa’s mouth moves against her neck, the sweet pain sending sharp jolts of arousal coursing through her body.

 _“Jesus, fuck.”_ Lexa’s muscular thigh presses firmly against Clarke’s center as sharp nips are scattered across her collarbones. She can’t fight back the groan that escapes her lips as she rolls her hips into Lexa’s thigh again. _“Lex….”_

 _“Hmmm?”_ Lexa’s warm breath washes over Clarke’s bare torso, causing goosebumps to rise on the pale skin. Clarke puts a hand under Lexa’s chin to tip her head up, groaning when she meets the brunette’s lust blown gaze.

_“Fuck me.”_

_“Oh I plan to.”_ Lexa accentuates her statement with a short kiss to Clarke’s fluttering pulse point. Her hands slide up Clarke’s toned stomach, short nails leaving slightly reddened marks in their wake. Lexa’s hands stop when the reach the lacy underside of Clarke’s bra. She meets Clarke’s eyes, questioning her silently. She waits for Clarke’s nod of approval, which she doesn’t get immediately. Before she has a chance to regret her request, she feels the fabric as it falls into her cupped hands. Lexa’s eyes search Clarke’s face, taking in the pink hue of the blonde’s cheeks. The wicked grin on Clarke’s face makes her body throb with desire. She needs to touch all of Clarke, like yesterday.

 _“Is that so, Heda?”_ The wanton groan that escapes Lexa’s lips at Clarke’s smoky whisper of her nickname makes the blonde chuckle.

Lexa quickly tosses the bra on the floor before continuing her journey. Clarke’s loud groan at Lexa’s first touch of her now bare chest is loud enough to make Lexa pull back so that she can silence the blonde with her lips. Clarke’s back arches off of the wall as Lexa’s hands tentatively brush her painfully erect nipples. The soft touches of Lexa’s slender fingers are enough to make the sensitive buds impossibly harder.

_“Mmmhmm, but not here.”_

_“What?”_ Clarke almost sounds angry at Lexa’s words. She attempts to pull her body out of Lexa’s embrace, but is unable to due to the brunette tightening her grip.

 _“I’m not going to fuck you against my bedroom door Clarke.”_ There is something about Lexa swearing that causes Clarke to fight back a groan. She rarely uses such dirty language, so if she’s being honest, it kind of really turns her on. _“At least not this time. Our first time together needs to mean more than that.”_

_“Why are you so fucking adorable?”_

_“I’m not adorable.”_

_“You totally are.”_

_“Whatever.”_ Lexa’s hand grabs at Clarke’s free leg so that she can wrap it around her waist. With Clarke’s weight fully on her hips, she turns them around so that she can take them to her bed.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke is sure that she will actually die if Lexa changes her mind right now. Actually, she’s pretty sure that she’ll kill Lexa and then die. ‘Murder-suicide: Due to sexual frustration’ will be the headline in the newspaper in the morning.

She is pretty positive that she has never been this turned on in her life. She’s so uncomfortably wet that she’d be surprised if Lexa couldn’t feel it through her jeans.

Princess Peach is demanding attention, and she’ll be damned if she doesn’t listen.

So when Lexa leads them to the bed, Clarke does everything in her power to keep Lexa’s mind occupied so that she doesn’t have time to second guess what they are about to do. She closes the already miniscule amount of distance between them to fuse their lips together. Lexa groans into the kiss, her fingertips digging harshly into Clarke’s jean clad ass.

She feels a momentary surge of panic as they move away from the safety of the door. Her weight is being completely supported by Lexa, and she can’t help but feel like maybe the brunette can’t handle holding her up. She knows that she’s being ridiculous; Lexa is more than capable of holding her up.

She curses her brain for trying to ruin this moment with its negative thoughts. She wants to enjoy this, because it’s been a long time coming. So she shuts her brain down and just lets herself FEEL.

She revels in the way Lexa’s arms are slung around her waist, strong hands cupping her ass to hold her in place. The way that Lexa’s tongue is hot and prodding against hers sends tremors down her spine.

She’s so lost in the feelings that Lexa seems to elicit inside of her that she doesn’t notice when they reach the bed. That is until her naked back presses against the plush mattress. Lexa immediately settles on her knees on the bed, in-between Clarke’s legs. She leans forward, bracketing her arms on either side of Clarke’s head so that she can reconnect their lips.

Clarke returns the kiss with equal fervor, matching Lexa’s tongue stroke for stroke. She kisses the brunette until she can’t breathe anymore, her hands fumbling absentmindedly with the hem of Lexa’s t-shirt. She breaks the kiss so that she can catch her breath, tugging impatiently at Lexa’s clothes.

_“You’re wearing too many clothes.”_

_“Should probably change that, shouldn’t we?”_

Lexa sits back up on her knees. She lifts her arms up so that Clarke can take her shirt off. Clarke takes her time in peeling the skin tight top off of Lexa’s torso. She balls the fabric up in her hands and drops it over the side of the bed.

As soon as the offending object is out of her way, she lets her eyes drift up the newly uncovered skin. It’s not the first time that she has seen Lexa in this state of undress, but she feels like this time is different. She takes in the sight of Lexa’s toned stomach, committing every defined abdominal muscle to memory.

 _“You’re so fucking beautiful,”_ her voice comes out as a choked whisper, full of all of the emotion that she is feeling right now.

Lexa gives her a shy smile, her tanned skin taking on a slightly reddish hue as she blushes with embarrassment.

 _“Me?”_ Clarke nods in affirmation, causing Lexa to let out a chuckle. Her brown curls bounce as she shakes her head in disbelief. _“Do I need to get you a mirror so that you can see what I see?”_

_“Please, I’m not….”_

_“Clarke,”_ Lexa leans forward so that she can press her lips against Clarke’s, effectively shutting her up. As she licks into Clarke’s mouth, her hands begin to wander up the blonde’s naked torso. Her fingertips ghost over the skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake. She breaks the kiss, only to press open mouthed kisses on Clarke’s cheek, until her mouth is near the blonde’s ear. _“Do you know how gorgeous you are?”_ Her whisper washes over Clarke’s ear, hot breath coaxing a groan out of the blonde’s mouth. _“Do you know what you do to me? Or how much I want to fuck you?”_

 _“Fuck…”_ Clarke groans out as her hands grip Lexa’s belt loops. She pulls harshly on the denim, bringing Lexa’s hips impossibly closer to her. _“Please Lexie.”_

 _“Hmmm.”_ Lexa’s tongue darts out to run down the side of Clarke’s ear. When she reaches the lobe, she brings it between her teeth so that she can bite down on it. _“Please what?”_

_“Just fucking touch me, please!”_

_“Where do you want me to touch you?”_

_“I don’t care, for fuck’s sake.”_

_“Okay. I think I’ll touch you here.”_ Lexa slides her hand down Clarke’s stomach, dipping her index finger into her bellybutton. Clarke squeals in laughter as Lexa’s soft touch tickles her.

_“Oh my god, stop.”_

_“What? You wanted me to touch you.”_

_“Not like that and you know it.”_

_“I can touch you like this if you want.”_ Eager hands run back up Clarke’s body, barely grazing her nipples. She arches off of the bed in an attempt to push her chest into Lexa’s hands, but the brunette moves her hands away. Clarke lets out a sound of disappointment, jutting her bottom lip out in a pout. _“No?”_

_“Please stop teasing. I can’t take it anymore.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa is torn.

She wants to keep up with her playful teasing, but she feels bad for torturing Clarke.

The way that Clarke is pouting right now makes her heart clench in her chest. That look, mixed with the fact that she is also painfully horny make her stop her teasing.

She reaches behind her back to quickly dispose of her bra, discarding it on the floor.

The way that Clarke’s eyes fixate on her chest makes her center clench in arousal.

Clarke Griffin is definitely a boob girl.

She doesn’t waste any time in bringing her hands up to cup Lexa’s breasts. She massages at the soft, pliant flesh, thumbs brushing hardened nipples.

 _“Clarke.”_ Lexa moans out as nimble fingers pinch at pebbled peaks.

Instead of verbally answering the brunette, Clarke sits up so that she can replace one of her hands with her mouth. Lexa groans in satisfaction, her head lolling to the side as Clarke’s warm mouth sucks and bites at her nipple. Her other hand continues its work, matching pace with her mouth.  Lexa’s hips buck slightly, in search of the friction that her body so obviously craves. Clarke lets out a husky chuckle against Lexa’s breast, releasing her nipple with an audible ‘pop.’

_“Now who is the impatient one?”_

Before Lexa can come up with a witty retort, Clarke turns her attention back to Lexa’s chest, taking the other nipple into her mouth. Lexa’s hands tangle in Clarke’s blonde locks as she lets out a particularly loud groan.

 _“Clarke,”_ Lexa’s voice is raspy, heavy with arousal. Clarke hums instead of answering, refusing to stop her ministrations. After a particularly sharp nip, Lexa flexes one of her hands, tugging ever so softly. Clarke tears her mouth away from Lexa’s chest, eyes black with arousal. Lexa growls at the almost feral look in Clarke’s eyes, she pulls Clarke up to face her so that she can smash their lips together.

Their kiss is messy and impatient, teeth clashing together, and noses bumping unceremoniously. Neither girl can be bothered to care. If anything, the sheer intensity of it only spurs them on even more.

Lexa is the first one to be able to think clearly enough to make the next move. Her lips feel bruised from the amount of kissing that has transpired. She could keep kissing Clarke forever really, but right now she needs to get the blonde naked. She wants to feel every inch of Clarke’s soft skin underneath her hands. She needs to hear the sounds that Clarke will make when she comes in Lexa’s mouth, or around her fingers. Really, she’s not picky. Her hands blindly search for the button of Clarke’s jeans. After a few fumbled attempts, she manages to pop the offending clasp open. The zipper is the next thing to go, sliding down almost effortlessly despite how preoccupied she is right now.

Her next conundrum is how to get the jeans off of Clarke’s body. She really doesn’t want to stop kissing the blonde, but she knows that it isn’t physically possible. Reluctantly she pulls out of the kiss, panting to catch her breath. Clarke whimpers pathetically, attempting to chase her lips as she pulls herself away.

 _“Patience.”_ Lexa chuckles as she places a chaste kiss on Clarke’s lips.

 _“Fuck patience.”_ Clarke mumbles against her lips.

Lexa curls her fingers into Clarke’s belt loops so that she can pull her up into a standing position as she gets off the bed.

Actually removing the rest of their clothes is quite a struggle due to the fact that they can’t keep their hands off of each other. Soft kisses and touches distract them from their ultimate goal, but only momentarily. Clarke manages to get Lexa’s pants down first, leaving the brunette in just a pair of Lacy black panties.

Clarke takes her sweet time in admiring the beautiful woman in front of her. The artistic side of her wants to ask Lexa if she can draw a full body portrait of her. The extremely horny side of her wants to know what the fuck is taking her so long. Why aren’t her hands all over the body in front of her?

While Clarke is distracted ogling Lexa’s lithe frame and legs for days, Lexa manages to unfasten and pull down her jeans. Clarke steps out of them and kicks them off to the side.

_“See what I mean? You’re gorgeous.”_

Clarke’s hands come up to grip Lexa’s bare hips. She pulls the other girl flush against her, reveling in the skin on skin contact. Judging by the relieved groan that escapes Lexa’s lips, she is feeling the same way.

The look of affection on Lexa’s face makes Clarke feel completely bare, almost as if the other girl is staring deep into her soul. It makes her feel uneasy, in the best way possible.

_“Stop looking at me like that.”_

_“Like what?”_

_“Like I’m the most amazing thing you’ve ever seen.”_

_“Well then, be prepared for me to look at you like this for as long as we know each other. Because you are exactly that.”_

_“See? I told you that you were adorable.”_

Clarke knows that she is blushing furiously because of Lexa’s brutally honest confession. And as much as she is enjoying this little game of eye foreplay that they are currently engaging in, she wants her hands and mouth all over the brunette. She wants to kiss her everywhere, and memorize the response that she gets from every touch.

When Clarke closes the distance between them, Lexa’s eyes snap shut. This kiss is different. It’s slow and exploratory, but it still holds the same amount of heat as their previous kisses. Lexa lets out a breathy sigh as Clarke deepens the kiss, one hand coming up to wrap around the back of Clarke’s neck to hold her in place. Clarke’s hands tighten around Lexa’s hips, guiding the brunette back over to the bed. Without breaking the kiss, Clarke eases them down onto the mattress, effectively straddling the brunette’s hips.

Clarke moves her mouth away from Lexa’s, kissing every inch of the brunette’s face. She kisses the side of her mouth, the freckle on her top lip, her cheeks, eyelids, nose and then her forehead. Each kiss is met with another sigh, Lexa’s fingers tangling into her hair. The sharp tug of her hair makes her let out a gasp, the painful pleasure at just the right amount. Her lips move back down Lexa’s face until she reaches the brunette’s unbelievable jawline. She peppers kisses across it, reveling in the noises that Lexa makes.

When she reaches her favorite spot, she nuzzles into it. Kissing the crook of Lexa’s neck, she takes the skin covering the carotid artery into her mouth so that she can bite down on it. Lexa’s response is immediate, she gasps loudly as her free hand tightly grips Clarke’s hip to keep her steady. Her own hips cant upwards to meet Clarke’s in search of friction. Without the barrier of their jeans they can feel the immense amount of heat radiating off of the other. Clarke moans against Lexa’s neck before she returns to her work on the wildly fluttering pulse point.

Clarke has always had a high sex drive. When she was still hooking up with Harper they were quite active. They found time to get together at least twice a week. Even when she was with Finn they were intimate quite often, so she’s not patient at all when it comes to waiting for sex. She seriously has no idea how she has lasted for so long without the touch of another person. But she isn’t going to wait anymore.

Her hands are getting restless against Lexa’s hips; they itch with the urge to touch. She slides her body down slightly so that she can settle between Lexa’s legs. With another nip to her very present love bite, she lets her hands roam free. Her hands trail slowly down Lexa’s sides, goosebumps rising in their wake. The groan that Lexa lets out when Clarke rests her hands on the top of her thighs is downright sinful, and it causes a fresh rush of arousal to flood Clarke’s body.

 _“Clarke,”_ Lexa’s voice is rough, heady with her arousal. _“Please…”_

The first touch happens above Lexa’s panties. Clarke moans loudly as her fingers press against the ruined black lace. The immense heat coming from Lexa’s center is addicting. Lexa moans as she arches her back in order to press her center against Clarke’s fingers.

_“Jesus Lexa.”_

_“I need you.”_

_“I’ve got you babe.”_

Clarke takes a deep breath as she moves Lexa’s panties to the side. She has to bite back a groan as she is finally awarded with the sight of Lexa laid out bare before her. She is surprised to find that the brunette is clean shaven. The lack of hair makes it easy for Clarke to see just how aroused Lexa is. Clarke licks her lips at the thought of moving down so that she can taste the brunette. If she’s already addicted at just the thought, she can’t imagine what it’ll be like when she actually goes down on Lexa.

Blue eyes meet green as Clarke’s fingers run between Lexa’s thighs. Clarke lets out a groan as her fingers come into contact with Lexa’s silken heat.

_“Fuck. You are so wet Lexie. Is that all for me?”_

_“Yyyyes…”_ Lexa’s words break off into a broken whine as Clarke’s index finger presses softly against her clit. _“Oh god Clarke.”_

_“Hmmm.”_

Clarke removes her hand from Lexa’s center, causing the brunette to let out a whimper. Clarke locks eyes with Lexa, who is very obviously pouting right now. She grins wickedly at the brunette, bringing her index finger into her mouth so that she can taste Lexa’s arousal. Clarke lets out a moan, eyes slamming shut in ecstasy.

Lexa tastes just as good as Clarke had imagined. Maybe even better. When she opens her eyes to look at Lexa’s reaction, she bites back a gasp. Lexa’s eyes have darkened considerably more, almost completely black now. Her bottom lip is tucked between her teeth. Lexa’s cheeks are completely red, with embarrassment or arousal, Clarke can’t be sure. All she knows is that it is endearing as hell.

_“God Lex, you taste so good. Can I? Please?”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa wants to say no, she really does. She’s never really been one to enjoy the act of having her partner go down on her. It just wasn’t something that she particularly enjoyed. Granted, the only person that had ever gone down on her was Costia, and she had never come from it.

The problem was that Costia loved going down on her. So anytime that they made love Lexa would have to coax Costia to only use her fingers. Most of the time she was successful, and when she wasn’t, she would have to fake her orgasm.

Lexa is really terrified of letting Clarke go down on her. She wants things to be special with the blonde and she’s afraid that this whole experience will be tainted if she allows it.

Plus she’s still a bit heated about all of the teasing that Clarke has been doing. So she decides that it’s time for payback.

_“Come up here and kiss me.”_

Clarke looks confused for a second, but she quickly complies. She crawls up Lexa’s body slowly, both of them groaning at the brush of bare skin. When she reaches Lexa’s face, the brunette immediately lunges forward to capture her lips.

The kiss is messy, teeth clacking together as they fight for dominance. Lexa hooks one of her legs around one of Clarke’s knees. A strong hand placed on Clarke’s shoulder is all it takes to flip the blonde over. The kiss is broken as Clarke’s back slams into the bed. Before Clarke can react, Lexa straddles her thighs, pinning her body to the mattress.

_“Lexa, what? I didn’t even…”_

_“Nope. It’s my turn.”_

Lexa presses a chaste kiss to Clarke’s lips before she begins her torture. She wants to tease Clarke until she begs for release.

She slides her hands into Clarke’s, interlocking their fingers. She moves Clarke’s hands above her head and pins them underneath one of hers. Clarke lets out a groan as Lexa slowly begins to kiss every inch of her body. She starts with her forehead, barely grazing her lips across the heated flesh.

Next, her attention is turned to Clarke’s jawline. She flattens her tongue and runs it across the skin. Clarke groans as she lifts her hips, desperately seeking some sort of friction. Lexa smiles against Clarke’s cheek before moving to her neck. She takes a deep breath in, reveling in the slightly salty tang of her neck. She latches onto the pulse point, sucking the skin into her mouth. Working it between her teeth, she lets her free hand wander. It immediately seeks out a breast, thumb and index finger grabbing onto a puckered nipple.

_“Lex, fuck.”_

_“Hmmm? Do you like that?”_ Lexa bites down once more on the carotid artery before pulling back. She admires her handiwork, happy that Clarke will bear her mark of passion for the days to come.

Her hand begins to knead the ample flesh underneath its grip. She’s pretty in love with the blonde’s chest. Not that she is really surprised at that. She’s always been a boob girl, and Clarke definitely has a great rack. Not that she is objectifying the blonde, not at all. 

_“God, yes.”_

Lexa moves down Clarke’s body, kissing each inch of skin that she comes across. Her mouth finds the other breast, and she immediately takes the nipple into her mouth. Clarke moans and arches her back, pressing her chest further into Lexa’s mouth.

With each lap of her tongue, Clarke becomes more restless. She is squirming against Lexa’s body in search of some relief. Lexa almost feels bad. Almost. But she’s not ready to end the game yet, so she continues on her path.

When she feels like each breast has received enough attention, she begins her descent down Clarke’s body. She leaves multiple marks down Clarke’s stomach, loving the way that it makes Clarke thrust up in search of more.

She finally reaches her destination and she’s ready to begin the next stage of her teasing. She turns her attention to Clarke’s left leg. Starting at the top of her foot, she presses her lips softly to the top. Clarke lets out a soft laugh as Lexa’s lips tickle her slightly. Lexa takes her time touching every inch of Clarke’s left leg with her mouth.

Clarke’s moans are louder and more plentiful by the time she makes her way over to the right leg. Lexa knows that she is close to begging, and she is so ready for it to happen.

She slows her pace as she moves up the right leg, letting her lips linger on the pale skin. Clarke is thrashing against the bed, groaning almost painfully as Lexa avoids the place where Clarke needs her most.

When she reaches Clarke’s center, she is prepared for the sight in front of her. Clarke is absolutely drenched with her arousal; the wet patch on her panties makes Lexa groan. The smell of Clarke fills Lexa’s nose, heady and sweet. It makes her mouth water with anticipation.

Clarke lets out a soft whine, causing Lexa to look up and meet her eyes.

 _“Lexa.”_ Clarke’s tone is desperate and begging, hoarse with lust. _“Please.”_

_“Please, what?”_

Lexa moves her head up just a little bit more, allowing the tip of her nose to rub against Clarke’s panty clad center. Clarke’s hips rise, causing her center to bump against Lexa’s nose. She lets out a moan of approval at the friction.

_“Fuck! God, Lexa please.”_

_“What do you want me to do, Clarke?”_

_“I need you to fuck me.”_

_“Is that so?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Are you sure that you want me to FUCK you?”_

_“Ugh, yes. I will probably die if you don’t.”_

_“Oh, well we wouldn’t want that, now would we?”_

_“No.”_

Lexa hooks her fingers into the sides of Clarke’s lacy blue panties. She quickly helps the blonde out of the ruined panties before tossing them blindly behind her. She takes in the sight before her as she settles back down between Clarke’s legs. She fixates on the tiny swatch of trimmed blonde hair sat on top of glistening lips.

_“God Clarke. You are soaked.”_

_“I know. Just please make me come. I can’t wait anymore.”_

Lexa growls before closing the distance. The first swipe of her tongue elicits a sob of relief out of Clarke. One of the blonde’s hands comes down to tangle in Lexa’s brown curls to hold her in place. Almost as if Lexa is going to change her mind and stop. Ha! Lexa’s internal monologue laughs at the audacity of even contemplating stopping.

She was addicted to Clarke from the very first taste. The musky but sweet taste is something that Lexa will never tire of. She uses her tongue to collect some beads of arousal, moaning at the taste. Her tongue moves down to tease at Clarke’s entrance, prodding slightly without actually entering her.

_“Jok! Beja, Heda. Teik ai kom op.”_

Lexa’s head moves away slightly in shock at the sound of Clarke speaking Trigedasleng. She looks up at Clarke, who is now glaring at her for stopping.

_“Why’d you stop?”_

_“Where did you learn Trigedasleng?”_

_“Raven has been teaching me.”_

_“I never thought that I would say this about the language that Anya and I made up when we were kids. But please keep doing that. It’s really fucking hot.”_

_“Sha Heda. Nau jok ai beja.”_

_“Sha, ai niron.”_

Lexa turns her attention back to Clarke’s sex. Her tongue takes another swipe through the blonde’s drenched center. Clarke moans loudly, her fingers tugging almost painfully at Lexa’s hair. Lexa groans against Clarke’s sex, tongue flicking against the blonde’s clit.

_“Fuck!! Lexa!”_

Lexa begins to work up a rhythm, tongue working against Clarke with fervor. Clarke’s groans reverberate across the room, loud and uncensored. Lexa is pretty positive that everybody in her apartment can hear exactly what is going on in her room, but she can’t bring herself to care. All she cares about right now is making Clarke feel as good as she possibly can. Judging by the sounds that the blonde is making, and the way her hips are constantly rolling to meet her thrusts, she’s doing a good job.

Clarke’s cries of encouragement are a sharp chant to Lexa’s ears. Most of the words are jumbled with cries of pleasure, but Lexa can make out her name being repeated like a prayer. The way that her name falls from Clarke’s lips makes her center clench. She wants to make Clarke cry out her name like this all the time.

She thinks that she can probably make Clarke come with just her mouth. Actually, she’s pretty positive that she can. But she wants to feel the blonde come around her fingers. Her free hand that isn’t currently fondling Clarke’s breast slides down her body, coming to rest at the tops of her thighs above her head. With one last flick of her tongue against the sensitive bundle of nerves, she positions her hand at Clarke’s entrance.

It’s not going to take much for Lexa to slip two fingers inside of the blonde, judging by the amount of wetness that she can feel on her chin.

Glancing up at Clarke, she sucks in a breath. Clarke looks absolutely stunning. Her eyes are locked on Lexa’s face, watching her every movement. Her cheeks are flushed a deep red and she has her bottom lip tucked between her teeth, worrying the skin slightly between them.

Lexa smiles softly at Clarke, pressing her lips against the top of the blonde’s mound. Clarke lets out a groan at the action, thrusting her hips up towards Lexa’s face. The action makes Lexa let out a quiet laugh.

 _“Why are you…..Oh, fuck!”_ Clarke’s words die off into a strangled curse as Lexa swiftly slides two fingers inside of her.

Lexa groans as her fingers are pulled in by Clarke’s tight walls. She sinks her fingers in until she is past the second knuckle.

_“Fuck, Clarke, you are so tight.”_

Clarke hums in agreeance as Lexa buries her fingers to the hilt. She allows Clarke time to adjust to the stretch, moving up Clarke’s body so that she can take a nipple into her mouth while she waits. She swirls her tongue around the stiffened bud, sucking and biting to her heart’s content.

_“God Lexa, please keep going. Don’t stop.”_

_“Oh, I definitely don’t plan on stopping.”_

Lexa turns her attention to the other breast, pulling her fingers almost all of the way out before slowly thrusting them back inside. Clarke’s head slams back against the pillow with a loud groan. She showers the blonde’s breast with attention, leaving love bites in her wake. She slowly works her way back down Clarke’s body until she can settle back in-between her legs, kissing every inch she comes into contact with.

She places love bites on either side of Clarke’s inner thighs, making sure to leave her mark deep into the skin. With a gentle thrust of her fingers that are still buried inside of Clarke, Lexa flattens her tongue so that she can flick it against the hardened bud of Clarke’s clit. Clarke’s back arches off of the bed, almost putting her in a sitting position. The blonde tangles both hands in Lexa’s hair, not putting any pressure on her, likely just to ground herself.

_“Fuck, Lexa!”_

Lexa smiles against Clarke’s center, flicking her tongue again. Clarke moans loudly, flexing her fingers that are woven through Lexa’s hair.

Lexa builds up a rhythm, thrusting her fingers in time with her tongue. Clarke’s hips are rolling against her face, loud groans spilling from her mouth.

It doesn’t take her long to build Clarke back up into an absolute frenzy, the blonde’s body desperate for release. The next thrust has a curl of Lexa’s fingers and a sharp flick of her tongue.

_“Oh my fucking God!”_

Clarke’s head thrashes from side to side on Lexa’s pillow as Lexa increases the speed of her ministrations. She thrusts into Clarke with reckless abandon, completely addicted to the sounds coming from the blonde’s mouth.

_“Lexa! Please keep going.”_

Lexa hums against Clarke’s center before sucking the hardened bud into her mouth. Clarke’s grip in Lexa’s hair tightens, a breathy gasp filling the otherwise silent room. Each time she thrusts into Clarke, Lexa curls her fingers just right, eliciting moans from the blonde.

She knows that Clarke is getting close, the sharp canting of her hips faltering in rhythm. Clarke’s walls are tightening around her fingers, making it harder for her to move. Lexa’s sure that it won’t take much more to tip Clarke over into endless bliss. And she is completely ready to see it happen.

_“Lex, harder…please…so close.”_

Lexa doubles her efforts, practically slamming her fingers in and out of Clarke. She pulls them almost completely out before thrusting them back in, ending each movement with a flick of her tongue.

_“Fuck! Lex, I’m gonna come.”_

The next thrust is what sends Clarke toppling over the edge. Lexa’s tongue lashes against her clit as she continues to work her over as wave after wave crashes over her. Clarke’s release floods Lexa’s mouth, her loud drawn out moan filling the bedroom.

After a few minutes of working the blonde through her orgasm, Clarke pushes against Lexa’s shoulder softly, silently letting her know that she needed Lexa to stop. Lexa slowly moves back up Clarke’s body, pressing open mouthed kisses to the slightly sweaty skin. Clarke’s arms loop around Lexa’s neck to pull her in for a kiss, which becomes heated quickly as Clarke tastes herself on the brunette’s mouth.

Clarke continues her assault on Lexa’s mouth, groaning as her own release coats her tongue. She swiftly runs her fingers down Lexa’s sternum as she battles the brunette for dominance of the kiss. She moans into Lexa’s mouth as her fingers slide through Lexa’s drenched center. She presses her index finger into Lexa’s clit, rubbing a tight circle against the bundle of nerves. Lexa pulls away from the kiss with a loud gasp as Clarke pinches the hardened nub between her index finger and thumb. The brunette slumps against Clarke’s sweat slicked body, unable to hold her weight up anymore.

_“Fuck, Clarke.”_

_“Lexie, you are so wet for me.”_ She rolls Lexa’s clit between her fingers once again, her middle and ring fingers slipping through the abundant wetness of Lexa’s center.

_“God, yes. Please fuck me.”_

_“I love it when you swear. It’s so fucking hot.”_ Clarke growls as her hands come to grip Lexa’s hips hard. She’s pretty sure that she is going to leave bruises but right now she can’t bring herself to care. _“Do you trust me?”_

Lexa’s wide green eyes meet Clarke’s azure ones. Clarke sees a momentary flash of panic in those forest greens, but it disappears quickly. Lexa nods her head slightly at Clarke before tucking her bottom lip in-between her teeth.

_“Yes.”_

_“Okay. I need you to move up on the bed.”_

_“Okay. Are you going to move?”_

_“No. I want you to straddle my face.”_

_“No.”_

Lexa’s facial features steel, her jaw clenched in what Clarke thinks might be anger. Or fear. One of the two.

_“Please.”_

_“No, Clarke. I don’t like that.”_

_“What? You don’t like it when somebody goes down on you?”_

Lexa shakes her head vigorously, sadness reflecting in her eyes.

_“Okay, that’s fine.”_

_“Really?”_

_“Yes. Why wouldn’t it be?”_

_“I don’t know. It’s weird to not like that.”_

_“Not really.”_

_“It doesn’t weird you out?”_

_“No. It makes me a little bit sad because I want to make you feel good. But I will do whatever you are comfortable with.”_

_“I’ve never been able to come from it.”_

_“How many women have you been with?”_

_“Just Costia. And now you.”_

_“Okay. Would you be terrible opposed to letting me try? I promise that I will stop if you don’t like it.”_

_“Um…”_

_“You don’t have to if you don’t want to. Like I said,”_ Clarke lifts her head so that she can kiss Lexa soundly on the lips. _“This is all about you enjoying yourself.”_

_“We can try.”_

_“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel pressured to say yes just because I want to do it.”_

_“Yes. We can try.”_

_“Okay.”_ Clarke presses her lips to Lexa’s again. _“I promise that I will stop as soon as you want me to. If you aren’t enjoying it, just let me know.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Alright. So just get up on your knees on either side of my face. You might want to hold onto the headboard.”_

Lexa does as instructed, bringing her knees to rest on the sides of Clarke’s face. She takes a deep breath to settle the panic brewing inside of her right now. She grips the headboard tightly, trying her best not to put too much of her weight on Clarke’s face.

_“Are you sure that you’re okay with this Lex?”_

_“Yyyes.”_

Clarke’s hands come around Lexa’s body to cup her ass, holding her in place.

The first swipe of Clarke’s tongue nearly makes Lexa jump to her feet. She lets out a loud groan as Clarke’s tongue runs through her folds tentatively.

_“Jesus Christ!”_

Lexa can feel Clarke smile against her. The blonde’s tongue begins to move with more confidence at Lexa’s loud exclamation. She flicks her tongue against Lexa’s clit, lashing the sensitive bud sharply, making the brunette cry out loudly.

This was one position that she never tried with Costia.  She made sure not to mention oral to Costia, for fear of her girlfriend wanting to try this with her.

Now with Clarke between her legs, she has completely forgotten about her dislike for oral. The way that Clarke’s tongue is moving against her is enough to make her see stars.

She can’t stop her hips from rolling when she feels Clarke’s tongue prod at her entrance. If not for Clarke’s iron grip holding her up right now, Lexa is pretty sure that she would fall over. Another roll of her hips makes Clarke’s tongue slip inside of her.

_“Fuck!!”_

Clarke begins to thrust her tongue inside of Lexa, completely entranced by the fluttering of the brunette’s walls. She can tell that it’s not going to take much more to send Lexa over the edge, and she wants to make this experience one that Lexa will never forget. After one more thrust of her tongue inside of Lexa, Clarke turns her attention back to the bundle of nerves. She sucks the hardened bud into her mouth, moving one of her hands so that she can slip two of her fingers inside of the brunette.

_“Please don’t stop Clarke.”_

Clarke pulls her face away from Lexa’s center, earning a sad whine from the brunette.

_“I wouldn’t dream of it babe.”_

Before Lexa can respond, Clarke sucks the bud back into her mouth. She lashes her tongue against it, thrusting her fingers in time with her mouth. Clarke moans against Lexa’s center as the brunette begins to ride her face with reckless abandon, taking what she needs from Clarke’s mouth and fingers. She’s too lost in her own pleasure to be quiet, her cries reverberating off of the bedroom walls.

Clarke begins to speed up her ministrations, building Lexa up to her climax quickly. She can feel the way that Lexa’s walls are clamping down on her fingers as she rides them. She opens her eyes so that she can watch Lexa ride her.

The sight before is nothing like Clarke as ever seen. She’s done this with Harper before, but nothing will ever compare with how ethereal Lexa looks right now. Her head is thrown back in pleasure, mouth slightly open as she cries out in ecstasy. Her eyes are screwed shut, brown curls wildly tousled as one of her hands pulls tightly at the locks. She is glistening with a light sheen of sweat, chest rising and falling rapidly.

Clarke is sure that she has never seen Lexa look more beautiful than she does right now. She lets her teeth scrape softly at the bundle of nerves, curling her fingers as Lexa rolls down on them.

Lexa is not a stranger to having an orgasm. Granted it’s been three years since she’s had one with another person. Maybe it’s the fact that she’s never had an orgasm from somebody’s mouth. Or maybe it’s the fact that the only person that she’s been intimate with since Costia has been herself. Regardless of the reason, she is completely unprepared for her climax to hit her.

Her orgasm hits her like a freight train, absolutely no warning as it washes over her. The only thing that she can do is grip the headboard until her knuckles turn white, Clarke’s name being screamed into the quiet room.

Everything after that is a blur.

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“What happened?”_

_“Um, well…”_

Lexa cracks an eye open at Clarke’s soft voice. The two women are lying face to face; one of Clarke’s hands is slung lazily over her waist. Clarke offers a shy grin before leaning in to capture Lexa’s lips in a chaste kiss.

_“You kinda passed out on me.”_

_“What?!”_

_“Yeah. At first I thought that maybe I killed you because you went completely silent after you screamed my name.”_

_“Oh my God, I am so sorry Clarke.”_

Clarke laughs softly, her hand leaving Lexa’s waist so that she can tuck an errant strand of hair behind her ear.

_“Don’t be. As long as you enjoyed yourself, that’s all that matters.”_

_“If the passing out on top of you wasn’t enough of a clue, I guess that I can tell you that I very much enjoyed myself.”_

_“I know. I just wanted to hear you say it.”_

_“Wow…so cocky.”_

_“Shut up.”_ Clarke places her hand on the back of Lexa’s neck so that she can pull her in for a kiss which quickly heats up. Clarke rolls Lexa onto her back so that she can straddle the brunette’s hips. She breaks the kiss so that she can sit up fully on top of Lexa. She rolls her hips firmly against Lexa’s, moaning as Lexa’s hands come up to grip her hips tightly to guide her in her grinding.

_“Somebody’s ready for round two.”_

_“I can’t help it. Princess Peach is insatiable.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“You owe me twenty bucks.”_ Raven calls from the hallway as she comes out of the bathroom. Anya, Octavia and Lincoln are still seated around the living room table, their game of Cards Against Humanity long forgotten. Harper got a call from her sister and asked Bellamy for a ride home, leaving the little party early. The group of four has been sitting around the living room talking about their summer plans since Clarke and Lexa ditched them. Raven plops down on Anya’s lap, kissing her girlfriend soundly on the lips. _“Actually you owe me forty bucks. Twenty for them hooking up and twenty for Lexa being louder in bed than Clarke.”_

 _“What? Dude no.”_ Octavia looks over at Raven with a scowl. She knows that Raven is right, but she really doesn’t like to lose. She doesn’t care about the forty dollars. Plus she’s super happy that things seem to be working out for Clarke and Lexa. But she refuses to lose to Raven.

_“Yes dude. We pinky promised on that shit. There is not getting out of this bet O. Just admit defeat and move on.”_

_“No way. Maybe they didn’t hook up.”_ O picks at a small hole on the knee of her jeans, continuing to feign ignorance.

_“Yes they did dude, how did you not hear Lexa screaming Clarke’s name?”_

_“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”_

_“Please. It’s too early for that parasite that’s growing inside of you to be clogging up your ears.”_

Raven’s eyes widen as the words spill from her mouth. Now was not the time to have no verbal filter. The wild look in Octavia’s eyes let her know that she didn’t imagine blurting out that her best friend is pregnant.

FUCK…

 

**~*~*TBC~*~***

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

**Translations:**

**Jok! Beja, Heda. Teik me kom op - Fuck! Please Commander. Make me come.**

**Sha Heda. Nau jok ai beja. - Yes Commander. Now fuck me please.**

**Sha, ai niron - Yes, my lover.**

 

 

 

 


	14. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Raven's slip-up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Here it is guys. I know that it’s been quite a long time since I’ve given you guys an update. I wish that life wasn’t so busy right now and I am sorry. It also doesn’t help that I have been sick as a dog for the past three weeks. I am not very happy with this chapter…I kind of feel like I’m stuck in a rut until I send the girls on their road trip. Which should be in the next chapter. So I hope that this doesn’t disappoint and that you all enjoy it. Trigedasleng translations are at the end of the chapter.  
> As always, thanks to my favorite Asshat for being amazing and proofreading this update so that it isn’t filled with typos and missed punctuation. Also, for dealing with my crazy processes.  
> Read on and enjoy my dear readers.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Barista’s Choice**

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Chapter 13**

**~*~*~*~*~***

 

_“Clarke.”_

Raven’s voice is the only warning that Clarke and Lexa get before the brunette bursts into Lexa’s bedroom. Clarke barely has enough time to pull the comforter over their still naked bodies.

 _“I’m going to fucking kill her.”_ Clarke growls, making Lexa laugh heartily.

 _“It’s fine.”_ Lexa murmurs against Clarke’s lips, kissing the scowl off of her face.

Lexa’s bedroom door opens with so much force that is bangs against the wall, the thump resonating around the otherwise silent bedroom. Raven hurries inside of the room, panic written across her features.

 _“Clarke,”_ Raven repeats, breathless.

 _“What the hell do you want Rae? I’m kinda busy.”_ Clarke gestures to herself and Lexa as they are still in a very precarious position.

_“Yeah, I know. It smells like a fucking brothel in here. But we have bigger problems right now.”_

_“Somebody better be fucking dead.”_

_“Well, not now, but I probably will be soon.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Um, because I…”_ Raven puts her hand over her mouth, muffling the rest of her sentence. _“I kind of let it slip about the parasite.”_

_“What? Uncover your mouth so that I can hear you.”_

_“I fucked up and told everybody about O’s problem.”_

_“WHAT!!! You did what?!”_ Clarke’s eyes widen in shock. The cover falls down as she sits up in the bed, uncovering her chest. She is so shocked that she doesn’t notice that she is flashing her best friend.

_“The parasite. Also, you should probably cover your tits.”_

_“Forget about that. You’ve seen the girls before. I can’t believe that you fucking slipped.”_

_“What’s going on here?”_ Lexa questions, glancing over the side of her bed for something to cover up with.

_“Um, nothing.”_

_“Oh, it doesn’t matter Raven. You already told everybody.”_ Clarke turns to face Lexa, who has miraculously found a shirt on the floor. She pulls the top over her head, covering her bare torso. _“Octavia is pregnant.”_

_“She’s what?”_

_“Yeah. She just found out earlier today.”_

_“Oh my god.”_

_“Yeah. Fuck, Rae. How could you let this happen?”_

_“Look, you know that I don’t have a very good filter. Add alcohol to that and you might as well just knock me out because that’s the only way that I’ll shut up. I didn’t mean to…”_

Clarke gets up from the bed, apparently not too worried about the fact that she is stark naked. Raven averts her eyes while Clarke moves over to Lexa’s dresser to grab something to wear. Lexa on the other hand, allows her eyes to follow Clarke as she gets dressed. If Raven wasn’t in the room mid crisis, Lexa would definitely drag Clarke back into her bed so that they could go another round. Or two.

_“Is Bell still here?”_

_“No, he took Harper home and went to his hotel room with Echo so that they could get some sleep.”_

_“Oh good. We definitely didn’t need to deal with that.”_

_“RAVEN!!!!”_ Octavia storms through Lexa’s bedroom door as Clarke is pulling on a tank top and pair of boxers. Octavia stops in front of Raven, rage burning deeply in her eyes, fists clenched tightly at her sides. _“What the fuck!”_

 _“O,”_ Raven lifts her hands up in surrender. _“I’m sorry.”_

_“Why? Why couldn’t you keep your mouth shut?”_

_“I didn’t mean to. Octavia, I swear. It was an accident.”_

Clarke moves back towards the bed, where Lexa is watching the scene in front of them. She leans down to whisper in the brunette’s ear.

_“Hey, can you go out there and check on Lincoln and the rest of them? I have to make sure that these two don’t kill each other.”_

_“Yeah, it’ll cost you though.”_

_“Oh yeah?”_

_“Yup. One million kisses please.”_

_“I think that can be arranged. It might take me some time though.”_

_“I’m patient. Can you maybe grab me some pants though?”_

_“I guess.”_

_“Unless you want me to go out there and flash the room my vagina.”_

_“Um, no. I’m good there.”_

_“Okay, thought so. Pants please.”_

Clarke laughs softly, pressing her lips against Lexa’s briefly. She quickly makes her way over to the dresser again, grabbing Lexa the first pair of pants that she sees. She tosses the pants over to Lexa before walking over to her two friends.

_“I just don’t understand why you couldn’t just keep one fucking secret.”_

_“O, please. I’m sorry.”_ Raven ‘s eyes are pleading, searching Octavia’s face.

_“Guys, we need to keep it down.”_

_“Why? Everybody already fucking knows that I’m pregnant now. Might as well call my fucking parents and let them know. Or hell, my grandparents would love to know that their granddaughter went and got knocked up out of wedlock.”_

_“O, you need to calm down.”_ Clarke tries, placing a hand on her best friend’s shoulder. Octavia immediately shakes Clarke’s hand off before turning to face the blonde with a deep scowl on her face.

_“I’m sorry. One of my so called best friends just did the one thing that I specifically asked her not to. I’m pretty sure that I have a right to be fucking angry.”_

_“I’m not saying that O. But what good is it going to do for you to get all stressed out?”_

_“Oh spare me the fucking lecture Doctor Griffin,”_ Octavia spits out, venom in her voice. _“I don’t need your medical opinion.”_

_“Wow. Harsh.”_

Clarke leaves the room without another word, angry tears burning her eyes. She knows that her best friend is upset, but she feels like that was a little bit uncalled for. She finds Lexa in the living room with Anya. Lincoln is nowhere to be found. She looks over at the two girls questioningly.

 _“He left.”_ Anya replies with a shrug of her shoulders.

_“He left. And you just let him?”_

_“What was I supposed to do? He looked like he was about to throw up or pass out.”_

_“So you just thought why not? Just go wander the fucking streets after finding out that your girlfriend is pregnant. Why did that seem like a good idea?”_

_“I don’t know. I’m not his fucking keeper.”_

_“Oh for fuck’s sake, Anya.”_

_“Look. I’m not trying to be a bitch, really I’m not. But, Octavia should’ve told him.”_

_“She just found out a couple of hours ago. She was going to tell him as soon as they were alone.”_

_“Oh…fuck. Well, I’m sorry. I thought that she had known and was just keeping it from him.”_

_“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.”_ Clarke runs her hand through her tangled blonde locks in frustration. _“Lexie…can you go over to his apartment and make sure that he’s alright?”_

_“Clarke, it’s like two in the morning.”_

_“I know, but we have to make sure that he’s alright.”_

_“Okay, but I’m taking Fish with me.”_

_“Okay, thank you.”_ Clarke presses her lips against Lexa’s gratefully. Lexa sighs into the kiss but doesn’t try to deepen it. She reluctantly pulls away after a moment, leaving a dazed brunette behind.

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Again.”_

_“Lex. We’ve been running on these treadmills for almost two hours. I’m fucking exhausted.”_

_“Too bad Lincoln. Keep running.”_

_“It’s four in the morning.”_

_“I don’t care. We are going to keep running until you get your head out of your ass and go back to your girlfriend.”_

_“I just…”_

Lexa slows her pace, turning her treadmill off. Lincoln looks over at the brunette, who has barely broken a sweat. He’s pretty sure that she’s not human right now. They’ve been running for two hours and he’s pretty sure that he is going to die. Sweat is pouring down his body, and due to his untimely exit from Lexa’s apartment, he forgot a towel. So now he’s been forced to remove his shirt so that he has something to keep the sweat out of his eyes. Lincoln turns his machine down and slows his pace until he can get off of the treadmill. His legs feel like jelly as he steps off, warning him to take it easy lest he want to fall as he steps onto the stable ground.

 _“Lincoln, I know that we’ve only been friends for a couple of months now. You’ve quickly become like a brother to me. That being said, I feel like I have the right to tell you this.”_ Lexa cracks open her bottle of water, chugging half of it in one gulp. _“You’re being a fucking idiot.”_

_“That’s a little harsh Lex.”_

_“Oh I’m sorry. Did I hurt your feelings? You should be over the moon right now. The woman that you love is growing your child inside of her. That is a miracle. And it’s beautiful.”_

_“But, I don’t know if I’m ready to be a father.”_

_“How long have you and Octavia been together?”_

_“Five years.”_

_“That’s a long time.”_

_“Yeah, I know.”_

_“Do you love her?”_

_“Of course I do. Why would you even question that?”_

_“Because I’m sure that she’s doing the same exact thing right now.”_

_“I don’t…”_

_“Let me finish. I can speak from experience in this sort of thing. My mother is an amazing woman. She is the reason why I have grown up into the woman that I am today. She did a fabulous job raising me while still managing to juggle a career that demanded a lot of her time. Liliana Woods is an awesome lawyer and an even more impressive mother and she is probably the reason why I decided to pursue law. But, I know that raising a hellion like me while working eighty plus hours a week was nothing short of stressful.”_

_“What is the point of this Lex?”_

_“My father…sperm donor really, is a bushhada. He claimed that he loved my mother, but as soon as she found out that she was pregnant with me, he ran. Similar to what you did to Octavia. He ran and he never once looked back. Literally the only thing that I know about him is his name. Sure, I could look him up and try and reconnect with him, but why would I want to? He didn’t want to know me.”_

_“Lex, I’m sorry.”_

_“I’m not looking for sympathy. I’m not any worse off having grown up without a father. My mother thrived even though she had to raise me alone. And I have no doubt in my mind that Octavia will do the exact same. She has an even bigger support system than my mother did. The only difference is that I’m not going to let you abandon her. You are going to march over to her dorm room and apologize to that poor girl. You are going to sack up and take responsibility for your life. And your child’s. Because that baby deserves better than a deadbeat dad. Got it?”_

_“Sha Heda.”_

_“Os, Linkon. NODOTAIM!!!”_

Lincoln’s eyes widen as Lexa’s presence effortlessly shifts from relaxed to commanding in an instant. He hops back onto his treadmill and switches it on, ready for his next round of punishment.

**~*~*~*~*~***

The night shift at Grounder’s is now Clarke’s least favorite shift to work. Before she met Lexa, she loved working nights. The café is extremely slow after dinner, unless it is the weekend. So Clarke had a lot of extra time on her hands to work on her homework, or her ‘extra-curricular’ activities with Harper. Plus it helped that she had a tendency to be a night owl.

Now that she’s used to the hustle and bustle of the early morning rush, she can’t get back into the swing of things with the night shift.

She’s tired, and she is definitely worried about Octavia. Her best friend hasn’t left her room since Lincoln walked out on her two days ago. There has been complete radio silence on his end, and Octavia is not taking it well.

So now she’s here, covering her best friend’s shift. It’s probably a good idea too, because otherwise she would probably look for Lincoln so that she could kick his ass.

The bell above the door rings, announcing the arrival of a customer. Clarke looks up from her sketchbook, smiling when she sees Raven walk in the door.

She’s not mad at Raven, even though Octavia is beyond livid at the brunette right now. Clarke is trying to stay impartial so that she can be there for both of her friends until they bury the hatchet. It’s proving to be rather difficult to leave Octavia’s side right now, so Clarke hasn’t really seen much of Raven in the past couple of days.

 _“Hey.”_ Raven offers an almost bashful smile as she walks up to the counter.

_“Hey Rae.”_

_“How’s it going?”_

_“Boring. I hate working nights.”_

_“You used to love them.”_

_“I know, but I can’t stand them now.”_

_“That’s funny.”_

_“So what brings you to my neck of the woods this lovely evening?”_

_“I just came to see you. You haven’t been to our dorm recently.”_

_“Yeah, I’ve been sleeping over at O’s.”_

_“How is she?”_

_“She’s miserable. She has been in bed for the past two days.”_

_“Ugh. Has Lincoln been by?”_

_“Nope. I talked to Lexa though. She’s been spending time with him at the gym. Apparently she’s been kicking his ass with cardio until he figures his shit out.”_

_“Aren’t they supposed to leave in two days with Bellamy?”_

_“Yeah. Lexa thinks that he’s close to breaking. Or death. Whichever comes first.”_

_“Fuck. I really screwed up Clarke. She’s never going to forgive me.”_

_“Yes she will. Just give her time. You know how she is.”_

_“God Clarke…”_ Raven begins pacing the floor worriedly, her limp more pronounced than normal. Clarke takes the time to really look at her best friend. Her eyes are red rimmed and swollen, a clear giveaway that she’s been crying. Her body language reads defeat.

 _“Rae. Have you been sleeping?”_ Clarke’s voice is laced with concern. She moves around the side of the counter so that she can move closer to Raven.

 _“I can’t. Both of my best friends are avoiding me. My girlfriend is barely talking to me. I just…”_ Clarke grabs Raven’s shoulders so that she can pull her best friend into a hug. The brunette slumps against Clarke’s body, letting out a sob as tears begin rolling down her face. Clarke slides them both down to the floor, pulling Raven into her lap. Raven nuzzles her face into Clarke’s neck, hot tears immediately soaking into her top.

Clarke runs her hands up and down Raven’s back, kneading her fingertips into the knots that she finds there. She feels her body start rocking back and forth, trying her best to soothe her best friend.

_“Shhh. It’s going to be okay Raven. I promise.”_

_“You can’t know that for sure.”_

_“I do. This will all blow over.”_

Clarke isn’t sure how long she sits on the cold tile floor holding her best friend while she cries. It breaks her heart that Raven is so lost right now and she feels like part of it is her fault. Sure, Raven made the mistake of telling Lincoln about the baby when Octavia explicitly asked her not to, but it was an accident. And Clarke has been so busy consoling Octavia that she’s left Raven alone to suffer.

_“I’m sorry Rae. I’ve been terrible to you the past few days.”_

_“No you haven’t.”_

_“Yeah, I have. I’ve been trying to keep O sane and I’ve left you alone to suffer.”_

_“It’s okay, I deserve it.”_

_“No you don’t, babe.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Lex, what about this one?”_

Lexa looks up from the book that she is skimming through to look over at Lincoln. He is holding up a mint colored onesie that reads, _‘My dad is the coolest.’_

_“That’s cute.”_

_“You think so?”_

_“Yeah. It should probably say something like, he might be cool but he definitely isn’t smart.”_

_“Ouch.”_

Lexa shrugs. _“It’s true.”_

_“Do you think that O is going to forgive me?’_

_“I don’t know. She should probably break up with you for being an idiot.”_

_“But she’s going to forgive me, right?”_

_“Yes Lincoln, she’s going to forgive you. Now hurry up and finish shopping. I want to go see Clarke.”_

_“Should I crack the whip now or later?”_

Lexa narrows her eyes at Lincoln, raising an eyebrow in his direction. _“Would you like to go back to the gym?”_

Lincoln holds his hands up in surrender, eyes widened in fear. Lexa chuckles slightly before waving him off. _“Thought so. Go finish shopping.”_

_“Fine, fine.”_

Lincoln walks away without another word, making Lexa shake her head in disbelief. She turns her attention back to the book in her hands. ‘What to expect when you’re expecting.’ She feels a small pang of envy at Lincoln’s current situation. She can’t help but wonder if she and Costia would’ve been planning a family if she was still alive.

Lexa has never been vocal about it, but she has wanted to be a mom for as long as she can remember. Not having any siblings, she’s always thought that two would be the perfect number of kids. She remembers playing house with Anya when they were growing up. She always got stuck playing the mom because she was younger and shorter than her best friend. Lexa always tried to argue that just because she was younger and shorter didn’t mean that she had to play the mom. Anya was always the more stubborn one of the two, so Lexa was always the first to relent.

They always decided on two kids, usually one boy and one girl. They were always fifteen months apart in age, no more, no less. Tris and Aden were their names, and they were always little hellions, just like their parents.

The chime of her text notification pulls her attention away from her book. She pulls her phone out of her pocket, smiling when she sees who the message is from.

**_Ai Niron: Did you know that Giant Squid’s brains are donut shaped?_ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Yes, I did actually. They are my favorite sea creature after all._ **

**_Ai Niron: Oh yeah, I forgot about that. How about this one? The Giant Squid’s esophagus passes through the middle of its brain. So it has to be really careful while swallowing because if the food isn’t broken down enough it can rub against the brain and cause brain damage._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Wow. I didn’t know that._ **

**_Ai Niron: Yasss! You don’t know everything about Squids! Lol._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Shush. How is work?_ **

**_Ai Niron: It sucks. It’s like super slow. I’ve been sketching for my entire shift._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: That sucks. I’m sorry. Just think, two more days of work and we start our vacation._ **

**_Ai Niron: Yay!!! I can’t wait._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: We’re going to have so much fun._ **

**_Ai Niron: Yes, we are. How’s everything going with Lincoln?_ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: It’s going much better. We are actually at Babies R Us right now._ **

**_Ai Niron: Shut up._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Seriously. He’s looking at clothes and god knows what else._ **

**_Ai Niron: Oh my god. That’s amazeballs. What are you doing?_ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: I am reading about the first trimester of pregnancy._ **

**_Ai Niron: Why?_ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: I don’t know. Why not?_ **

**_Ai Niron: It just doesn’t strike me as something that you need to read about. It’s not like you’re about to become a parent._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Not now, but maybe one day._ **

**_Ai Niron: Don’t tell me badass Lexa Woods wants to have kids…._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Don’t you?_ **

**_Ai Niron: Yeah. It seems a little soon for this conversation. I’ve only just managed to get you to sleep with me and now you want to have my baby?? ;)_ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Shut up._ **

**_Ai Niron: I mean, not that I’m opposed to you having my baby._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Alright, I’m going to stop talking to you now._ **

**_Ai Niron: No!! Wait! I’m sorry. I was only teasing._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Wow, you give up easily. ;)_ **

**_Ai Niron: You’re a jerk._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: You love it._ **

**_Ai Niron: Maybe. Is it stupid that I miss you right now?_ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Are you getting all sappy on me, Clarke?_ **

**_Ai Niron: It’s probably just because I’m bored at work._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Ouch._ **

**_Ai Niron: Kidding. I do miss you though._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: I miss you too. I gotta go; it looks like Lincoln is done. I’ll talk to you later._ **

**_Ai Niron: Boo. Leave me all alone then. Hopefully I don’t die of boredom before I hear from you again._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: You’ll be fine._ **

**_Ai Niron: Maybe. If I do die, tell Fish that I love him._ **

**_Commander Heart Eyes: Okay. I’ll tell Fish that you love him. But if you die, I’m going to kick your ass._ **

**_Ai Niron: Sounds sexy. :-*_ **

_“You ready?”_

Lexa looks up at her phone, eyeing a very sheepish looking Lincoln. He has a cart full of random items, clothing piling over the sides of it.

_“Do you think that this is a bit excessive, Lincoln?”_

_“I need to do a grand gesture to make her forgive me.”_

_“I think that just saying sorry will be enough. She just wants you there.”_

_“I hope so.”_

_“Trust me. She might beat your ass a little bit, but she’ll forgive you. Now let’s go pay for your ridiculous amounts of baby stuff so that you can go apologize to your girlfriend.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa was feeling desperate. She thought that her little text conversation with Clarke would abate some of the immense loneliness that she felt being away from the blonde, but so far nothing was working.

After dropping Lincoln off at Octavia’s dorm so that he could beg his way back into her good graces, Lexa drives mindlessly throughout town in Anya’s car. Before she knows what she’s doing, she pulls into the parking lot at Grounder’s.

The parking lot is almost empty this late in the afternoon. Lexa steps out of the car, pressing the lock on the key fob until the alarm activates.

Clarke looks up from her place at the front counter when Lexa walks in. She tries to fight the smile that breaks across her face, but she completely loses that battle when Clarke grins brightly at her. There are two patrons in the café right now, sipping their coffees together at a table off in the corner.

 _“Hi.”_ Lexa waves shyly as Clarke makes her way around the counter.

 _“Hey.”_ Clarke’s reply is breathy as she stops in front of Lexa. Her bottom lip is so kissable and Lexa can’t stop herself from leaning forward to capture it between her own.

Clarke hums against Lexa’s lips as she returns the kiss, completely forgetting that she is at work. She is pretty sure that she would be over the moon if she spent the rest of her life kissing Lexa like this. Lexa’s lips are firm but pliant against hers, moving with passion while still managing to be mostly appropriate for the public’s eye.

Not that Clarke really cares who sees them, not while Lexa is kissing her senseless.

She only breaks the kiss when air becomes a necessity, panting against Lexa’s lips.

_“Wow.”_

_“Wow’s right.”_

_“I guess that you did miss me.”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“Commander Sap is what I’m going to call you from now on.”_

_“That’s it. Give me that kiss back.”_

_“No way. You can’t take kisses back.”_

_“Yes I can.”_

_“No way.”_

_“I can and…”_

Clarke surges forward to kiss Lexa, effectively shutting the other girl up. She slips her hand into Lexa’s and interlaces their fingers together. She breaks the kiss, earning a whine from Lexa.

Lexa follows wordlessly behind Clarke as the blonde leads them into the back area of the café, leaving the two people alone at their table.

_“Where are we going?”_

_“Shh..just follow me.”_

_“What about the people in the café?”_

_“They’re regulars. They’ll be fine for a few minutes.”_

_“I don’t want you to get in trouble.”_

_“It’s fine, I won’t. We close in like twenty minutes anyway. Jim and Cindy have been my only customers for the last two hours.”_

_“You do know that Indra is a close family friend, right?”_

_“Yes, I know that. Why? Are you going to tell her that I brought you into the backroom?”_

_“I don’t know, maybe.”_

Lexa smirks at the blonde, earning a soft smack to her shoulder. She feigns pain, using her free hand to grip her arm. Clarke pulls on Lexa’s arm, smashing their bodies together. Lexa barely gets a groan out as Clarke’s mouth closes over hers. The blonde reluctantly lets go of Lexa’s hand so that she can grip the brunette’s slender hips. She backs Lexa up as they kiss, stopping when the backs of Lexa’s knees hit the couch in the breakroom.

The force of Clarke’s body against hers makes Lexa tip backwards onto the couch. The blonde immediately moves to straddle her hips, somehow managing to keep their lips connected. Lexa groans at the feeling of Clarke’s body pressing into hers.

 _“Clarke…”_ Lexa groans out as Clarke breaks away so that she can kiss alongside Lexa’s jawline. Lexa’s hands slide under Clarke’s shirt with only minimal trouble due to her apron. She runs her nails down Clarke’s back, eliciting a shiver out of the blonde. _“Clarke…”_

_“Hmmm?”_

_“We need to stop. I don’t want you to get in trouble because you’re in here and not watching the café.”_

_“I don’t want to.”_

_“You’re almost done babe.”_

_“Babe huh?”_

_“Hmm. I like it.”_

_“Me too.”_ Clarke mumbles against Lexa’s lips, kissing her softly. She pulls away with a sad groan, pressing her forehead against Lexa’s. _“Okay. I’m going to go back out there to close up the shop. Wait in here for me?”_

_“Trying to hide me from the masses Griffin? Are you ashamed of little ole me?”_

_“God no. But I won’t get anything done if your sexy ass is out there distracting me.”_ Clarke reluctantly gets off of Lexa’s lap, making her way towards the door.

_“You think my ass is sexy?”_

_“Um, have you seen you? Of course I think you’re sexy.”_

_“Right back at ya, babe.”_

The wink that Lexa sends in her direction almost makes her change her mind. She’s only been away from Lexa for two days, but it almost feels like an eternity. She knows that it’s ridiculous to feel so clingy towards the brunette, they’re not even together, but she can’t help herself. She’s addicted to everything Lexa.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Two days.

It’s been two days since Raven spilled the beans and blurted out to the room that Octavia is pregnant. Forty eight long hours have passed and she has not heard a single word out of her boyfriend. He’s been avoiding her like the plague. If not for Lexa’s updates to his whereabouts, Octavia would’ve assumed that he was dead by now.

She’s terrified that she’s never going to see him again.

She’s also extremely pissed off that he bitched out and ran instead of facing this situation with her. After all, it’s not like she got pregnant by herself.

If she does see him again, she’s going to beat the living shit out of him.

But for now, she’s just going to eat the rest of this carton of ice cream.

She knows that she looks a hot mess right now; she hasn’t showered or gotten dressed since Clarke dragged her home after she nearly strangled Raven in Lexa’s room. She’s made a body shaped indent into her mattress from lack of movement. It’s warm and comfortable in her little space. Maybe a little bit sticky from all of the ice cream that she’s consumed, but comfortable nonetheless. She’s been wearing one of Lincoln’s old high school football jerseys, surrounding herself in the comforting scent of her boyfriend.

It’s a double edged sword really, because having his scent around her is also wreaking havoc on her already fragile emotional state.

Clarke’s been her only saving grace. Her best friend has been staying in her dorm with her since the incident went down. She’s also been covering Octavia’s shifts for the past two days, giving up her free time to help out her best friend.

Clarke has been a complete godsend to Octavia.

She’s halfway through her Netflix queue when she hears the lock to her dorm room click open. She knows that it’s not Clarke seeing as she doesn’t get off until ten o’clock and it’s only nine thirty. She knows that Raven wouldn’t dare barge into her room since they are currently fighting. So that only leaves one other person with a key.

Lincoln.

She doesn’t want to look over at him as he walks into the room because she knows that her anger will dissipate as soon as she makes eye contact with him.

Her traitorous eyes move slowly across the room, stopping when her gaze falls on her boyfriend.

Lincoln’s arms are completely filled to the brim with shopping bags. He looks completely nervous, and like he hasn’t slept at all.

He offers a cautious smile as Octavia’s eyes meet his, and she feels something inside of her snap.

Her body suddenly fills with white hot rage and she can feel angry tears stinging in the corners of her eyes.

She’s on her feet before she can stop herself, stomping over to where Lincoln is standing. The bags fall to the floor as he lifts his hands up in surrender.

 _“What the fuck Lincoln!?!?”_ Octavia spits out, poking an index finger into his chest. She’s well aware of the fact that she’s sobbing right now, but she’s too emotional to stop herself.

She’s relieved that he’s okay, but she is so fucking pissed at him for making her worry in the first place.

He doesn’t stop her when she starts beating her fists against his chest in her anger. He just stands there and allows her to work her frustrations out on him. It doesn’t take her long for her to tire herself out; she hasn’t really been able to sleep in the past two days anyway. Lincoln’s strong arms wrap around her waist, pulling her against his broad chest. She can feel his lips press softly against her forehead, his stubble scratchy against her skin.

At some point her legs must’ve given out on her, because the next thing she knows, they’re both on the carpeted floor next to her door. She can hear soft sniffling coming from her boyfriend, leading her to believe that he’s crying as well. One look at his face confirms her suspicions, and causes a fresh flood of tears to fall down her cheeks. In the six years that they’ve been together, she has never seen Lincoln cry. It’s the most heartbreaking thing that she’s ever seen.

 _“Baby.”_ Lincoln’s voice is watery, thick with emotion. _“I am so, so sorry.”_

_“I am so fucking mad at you right now.”_

_“I know and you have every right to be. I am such an idiot.”_

_“No shit.”_

_“O,”_ Lincoln’s arms tug desperately at Octavia’s waist, pulling her body into his lap. He chokes back a relieved sob as she nuzzles into his body. _“Fuck. I was so scared, I am so scared. But that doesn’t excuse me running.”_

 _“I just…”_ A hiccup bubbles in her throat as she sobs into Lincoln’s chest. _“Why?”_

_“Because I’m a branwada.”_

_“A what?”_

_“A fool.”_

_“You’re goddamn right you are. I want to beat the living shit out of you.”_

_“I deserve that and so much more. Please, I know that I don’t deserve it, but let me make it up to you.”_

_“You’re going to be working for the rest of your life.”_

_“I don’t care. I’ll do whatever it takes.”_

_“Okay. I’m still mad, but I love you. I need you Lincoln.”_

_“I know baby. I need you too. And now we have another life to worry about. Because we made a baby.”_

Lincoln’s hands slide underneath Octavia’s shirt so that they can rest on her still flat belly. The gesture makes her heart swell, her anger momentarily forgotten. As Lincoln nuzzles his face into her neck, she is hit with an overwhelming sense of guilt. Lincoln pulls back from Octavia’s body when he feels her begin to shake with sobs. His concerned gaze searches her face.

_“Baby, what’s wrong?”_

_“Lincoln, I’m so sorry that I didn’t tell you right away about the baby.”_

_“It’s okay.”_

_“No it’s not. I should’ve told you as soon as I found out. But I was so scared and then we were at Lexa’s and I didn’t want to tell you in front of everybody else. I swear that I was going to tell you as soon as we got home.”_

_“I know that baby. I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at me.”_

_“But I still should’ve told you.”_

_“O, don’t worry about it, seriously.”_ Lincoln presses his lips against Octavia’s, kissing her softly despite their mess of tears. When he pulls away, he brings his thumbs up to wipe her tears away, a soft smile on his face. _“I’m still scared baby, but we can do this.”_

_“I know.”_

_“You’re going to be such a good mom.”_

_“Oh fuck.”_

_“What?”_

_“Our parents are going to eviscerate us.”_

_“Bellamy is going to punch me in the face. I already know it.”_

_“Probably.”_

_“When do you want to tell everybody back home?”_

_“I was thinking that we could set up a doctor’s appointment when we get out there, confirm everything. And then we can tell everybody after the wedding. I don’t want to take away any of Bell and Echo’s spotlight.”_

_“That sounds good to me.”_

_“Okay, good. You want to show me what you bought?”_

_“Yeah. But I have to ask you something.”_

_“What’s up?”_

_“I think that we need to get a place together.”_

_“You think?”_

_“Yeah. I mean, we’re going to have a baby. We should probably get a place. I don’t think that your roommate wants a baby in your room.”_

_“Good point.”_

_“So, Octavia, will you move in with me?”_

_“I mean, we’re kind of going about things backwards, don’t you think?”_

_“Why do you say that?”_

_“Well, I mean, I’m already pregnant. Usually you move in together before this happens.”_

_“It doesn’t matter. I would still ask you this even if we didn’t get pregnant.”_

_“You’re such a charmer, Linc.”_

_“I try.”_ Lincoln presses his lips against his girlfriend’s forehead. He pulls away and is immediately pulled into a searing kiss by Octavia. He can taste the saltiness of her tears mixing with the sweetness of her lips. God, he doesn’t know how he went two days without seeing her. He’s missed the simple intimacy of just being in her arms. _“So is that a yes?”_

_“Oh my god. Yes, you nerd. Now shut up and kiss me.”_

_“Why are you sticky though?”_

_“Because your fucking baby wanted ice cream.”_

_“Isn’t it a little early for cravings to start?”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“Let’s go take a shower.”_

_“Oh no. I may have forgiven you, but you aren’t getting any sir.”_

_“I just want to wash your hair.”_

_“Aww, baby. That’s so sappy. The Commander really tore you a new one, didn’t she?”_

_“You have no idea.”_

_“Maybe I should buy her some flowers as a thank you. Or maybe a candle.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

**_Trikru Group Chat-_ **

**_Linkon: Guys, she forgave me._ **

**_Onya: Os dula, Joka._ **

**_Linkon: Shof op, Nomajoka._ **

**_Heda: Chil au, goufa._ **

**_Linkon: She started it._ **

**_Onya: Oh my god. Pussy. Run and tattle on me to Heda to save your ass, dickhead._ **

**_Heda: Onya, chil daun. It’s not Linkon’s fault that he’s a branwada._ **

**_Onya: Yes it is. He thinks with his mami._ **

**_Linkon: Shut up._ **

**_Heda: SALINMOWFPAWHJEIOEN_ **

**_Linkon: WTF is that?_ **

**_Onya: Butt chat._ **

**_Heda: HSKNCkldmosmiewoe_ **

**_Onya: Lexa, what are you doing?_ **

**_Linkon: Yeah, what are you up to, Heda?_ **

**_Heda: I’m busy._ **

**_Onya: You’re never busy._ **

**_Linkon: Yeah, she’s right._ **

**_Heda: Well, I assure you that I am in fact, busy._ **

**_Onya: Busy with what?_ **

**_Heda: Busy is busy, does it really matter what I’m doing?_ **

**_Onya: Yes, yes it does._ **

**_Heda: Okay guys. This is Clarke. I am going to take Lexa’s phone away now. Because we are in fact, busy. So say goodbye to Heda, she’s mine._ **

**_Onya: Gross._ **

**_Heda: Sorry guys, the Skai Hainofi is in charge._ **

**_Onya: Oh my god Lex, you’re such a bottom._ **

**_Onya: Linkon, where’d you go? Running away again?_ **

**_Linkon: Stop being such an asshole. I was fucking scared._ **

**_Onya: You’re a coward! Running away from your girlfriend when you find out she’s pregnant._ **

**_Linkon: Are you telling me that you wouldn’t react the same way if Raven was pregnant?_ **

**_Onya: No, because first off I don’t have the equipment to accidently knock her up. And secondly, if I was in your situation, I would be ecstatic._ **

**_Linkon: That’s not the point. Plus, it’s not like Raven would be excited about it anyway._ **

**_Onya: What are you talking about, Linkon? Ron ai ridiyo op._ **

**_Linkon: It’s no secret that Raven doesn’t want kids, dude. So she would not be happy about being pregnant._ **

**_Onya: Yes, she does want them._ **

**_Linkon: Are you sure about that? Have you ever asked her?_ **

**_Onya: No, but I’ve seen a few pictures of her with some of Clarke’s cousins. She looked like she was having fun with them._ **

**_Linkon: She still doesn’t want them._ **

**_Onya: You don’t know that._ **

**_Linkon: I do know that. I’m not trying to be a jerk. But you need to understand that everybody processes things differently. I was and still am scared shitless about the fact that I am going to be a father, but I am also extremely happy. The woman that I love is growing a new life inside of her that I helped create. I don’t know the first thing about parenting, but I am excited to take this journey with her. I regret the way that I handled the news, yes, but I can’t take that back. All I know is that I am going to do my damnest to prove to O that I am in this for the long run._ **

**_Onya: Whatever dude. If you hurt her again, I’ll rip your dick off and shove it up your ass._ **

**_Linkon: Noted. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go pamper my girlfriend._ **

**_Onya: Later Bro._ **

**_Linkon: Later Sis._ **

_“Who are you talking to?”_

_“Oh it was just Lincoln and Lexa.”_

_“That’s nice. Did he work everything out with O?”_

_“I think so.”_

Raven smiles softly at her girlfriend before turning her attention back to the television. Anya lets out a sigh as Raven leans against her side.

She tries to focus on the television, she really does, but she can’t keep Lincolns words out of her head. It’s driving her crazy to sit here next to Raven and not know.

She’s always wanted kids. Growing up as an only child was kind of crappy, but she had Lexa and that was enough. Luckily their houses were only half a block apart, so they saw each other all the time.

That doesn’t stop her from wanting to have her own set of rugrats.

She can’t lie, she’s thought about what her kids with Raven would look like. She’s definitely imagined the sounds of their little feet as they run around the house.

 _“Hey. What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?”_ Raven’s soft whisper breaks Anya out of her reverie.

_“Just things.”_

_“What kinds of things?”_

_“You want kids, right?”_

_“I um, why do you ask?”_

_“It’s just a question.”_

_“Don’t you think that it’s a little too early for us to have this conversation? I mean, we haven’t been dating for very long.”_

_“Do you want kids Raven?”_ Anya sits up straight, moving her body away from her girlfriend’s.

 _“No.”_ Raven’s eyes flit around the room, attempting to look anywhere but at her girlfriend.

_“Really?”_

_“Really.”_

_“Ever?”_

_“Nope. Why, do you want kids?”_

_“Yeah, of course I do. I mean, not right this second, but eventually.”_ Anya gets up off of the couch, immediately beginning to pace the length of the living room. _“So you’re telling me that you never want kids?”_

_“No, is that really so surprising? Not everybody wants to have kids, you know.”_

_“I know, but like…You can’t ever see yourself with a couple of rugrats?”_

_“God, no. That sounds terrible.”_

_“But, why?”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Raven may not have a very good filter, but she’s always prided herself on her ability to keep a level head. There are very few things that make her blow up.

Kids and family have always been sore spots for her.

She really doesn’t like to talk about it because first she gets really mad, and then she cries. And Raven hates crying. So she’s really only talked about her life growing up with Clarke, O and Finn. She hasn’t really felt the need to bring up her issues with Anya, because her girlfriend has never mentioned kids before.

Now she has to trudge up all of the negative feelings that she tries to keep hidden behind smiles and inappropriate jokes, and she’s completely terrified.

Her mom was not what one would call a ‘model’ parent.

Tracy Reyes had problems from the beginning. She was a party girl as a teenager and ended up getting pregnant with Raven when she was only sixteen. She was at a party and drunkenly hooked up which some guy, and the rest as they say, is history. She could’ve done the responsible thing and given Raven up for adoption but she decided not to. Raven’s grandmother Maria helped out the best that she could, which wasn’t much.

The stress of trying to raise a child while still being a child herself really got to Tracy. She dropped out of high school and got a job waitressing tables at a local diner. The pay was horrible, but the tips usually made up for it.

Problem was, the money that she made at work went to Tracy’s newfound vice.

She met a guy that was pretty hardcore into drugs and of course he got her hooked on them.

Raven spent the first ten years of her life squatting in different buildings with her mom while she looked for her next hit. Her grandma would’ve helped, but she was in poor health.

A few weeks after Raven turned ten, social services paid a visit to the hovel that they were currently living in. A lovely woman by the name of Joanie whisked her away from her mother.

Her time in foster care wasn’t the greatest experience. She had some foster homes that were way better than squatting in random abandoned buildings. She also had some that made her almost miss her mother. As crazy as that may sound.

So she can’t really help the fact that she’s not excited about the prospect of bringing children into a world that allows them to suffer.

She wants to tell Anya all of this, she really does. There is nothing that she wants more than to have her girlfriend understand that she doesn’t hate kids. She knows that she’s nothing like her mom, but she can’t help but think that she would just fuck up an innocent child’s life. And she would rather die than to do to her child what her mother did to her.

Rather than hash out the painful details of her fucked up childhood, Raven resorts to what she knows best. Lashing out.

She feels the anger bubbling up inside of her and she doesn’t bother holding it back. She knows that this is going to push Anya away but at this moment, she can’t stop herself.

_“I just don’t want kids. For fuck’s sake Anya, can you just drop it?”_

_“I’m just trying to understand why.”_

_“It doesn’t fucking matter.”_

_“It does though.”_

_“Look,”_ Raven sighs as she runs a hand through her brunette locks, tugging harshly at the ends. _“Not everybody had the fucking fairytale upbringing that you had.”_

_“You think that I had a perfect childhood? Is that what you think?”_

_“Compared to the nightmare that was my childhood, probably.”_

_“Well, I don’t know much about your childhood, because YOU DON’T TALK ABOUT IT.”_

_“Sorry that I’m not keen on reliving it.”_

Anya stops her pacing around the room, turning to face Raven, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. _“Is it me? Do you not want to have kids with me?”_

Raven can feel her resolve crumbling. She wants to tell Anya everything, but she can’t make the words come out. Even though her heart is pleading with her to reach out and make her girlfriend feel better, she feels her sarcastic front win over. The laugh that she lets out is dry and completely humorless.

_“No, that’s not what this is even about.”_

_“So tell me.”_

_“I can’t.”_

_“This is never going to work if we don’t talk about things.”_

_“We do talk about things.”_

_“Yeah, obviously not important things. Like how you don’t want to have kids.”_

_“Can you just get off of that fucking subject please?”_

_“Can you just open up for once and tell me why?”_

_“Fuck. Can you just stop being so fucking pushy? Just for one goddamn minute.”_

Raven gets up from the couch hastily, stumbling a bit as she gets to her feet. She can feel the tears burning in her eyes from Anya’s pushing. She knows that she’s being ridiculous and she should just woman up and tell the girl that she loves about her childhood, but the urge to run seems like a better idea right now. She can’t even meet Anya’s eyes as she pulls on her beat up combat boots. She doesn’t bother tying them, opting to tuck the laces into the boots instead. She needs to get out of the apartment before she will allow herself to cry.

She’s almost at the door when she hears it, the sniffle barely audible. She can’t turn around or else she’ll break. Raven knows that Anya is crying and it hurts her more than she ever thought was possible.

_“Don’t walk out that door.”_

_“I..I..”_

_“Rae, please don’t leave.”_

_“I can’t be here.”_

_“So you’re just going to run away?”_

_“Yup, seems that way.”_

_“Way to be a fucking coward.”_

_“Nice.”_

_“I thought that you were different.”_

_“I guess not.”_

_“If you walk out that door….”_

Raven feels a cold jolt of fear hit her body. She can almost hear the unfinished sentence hanging in the air. _‘If you walk out that door…’_ She was almost positive that Anya was going to end their relationship with those six words. Even the tiny notion that she could lose this amazing woman makes her heart seize in pain. She can’t lose Anya, she just CAN’T. She’s not sure that she can survive heartbreak, not after Finn. Raven knows that she should turn around, apologize for being an asshole and tell Anya everything. For some reason though, she can’t stop her feet as they lead her out the front door.

_“RAVEN!!!”_

**-Don’t turn around Reyes. You both need time to cool down. Just go home, get in bed and then you can cry.-**

The walk back to her dorm is painful to say the least. She spends the entire twenty minute walk berating herself on how she handled the situation. There had to be a better way to stop the argument before it escalated to the point that it did. She lets the tears fall as she walks, not caring who sees her cry.

By the time she stumbles into her room, she is a snotty, blubbering mess. She can’t see through the tears, her nose is completely clogged and she’s pretty sure that her leg is about to fall off. She doesn’t even bother changing, opting to just fall into bed in her clothes, shoes included. The sobs are wracking her body violently, making her breath come out in loud gasps.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Her heart is beating erratically in her chest, so much so that she’s pretty sure that it’s about to burst. She can hear her blood pounding in her ears as Clarke’s lips press open mouth kisses to her inner thighs. Just as Clarke’s mouth moves to where Lexa needs her the most, she hears it. Raven and Anya’s raised voices in the living room, arguing over who knows what. Lexa tries to ignore it, because Clarke is doing very naughty things with her tongue and she really, really wants to enjoy it.

 _“Oh my god, Clarke.”_ Lexa’s back arches as Clarke’s tongue slides through her folds. Clarke hums in approval and Lexa’s eyes close as she attempts to give into the sensations. She doesn’t have much time to enjoy it because Lexa hears Anya yell right as Clarke’s tongue flicks against her clit. “Clarke.” Lexa brings one of her hands down to tap Clarke’s shoulder. Clarke ignores the first tap to her shoulder, her tongue circling Lexa’s clit again. Lexa lets out a loud groan before tapping Clarke’s shoulder frantically.

 _“What?”_ Clarke mumbles before swiping her tongue through silken folds again.

 _“Stop for just a second.”_ Lexa gasps out. Clarke’s only response is another swipe of her tongue. Lexa’s back subconsciously arches again as she tries to push her center harder against Clarke’s mouth. _“Clarke, did you hear that?”_

Lexa knows that Clarke isn’t going to stop, but judging by the loud slam of her front door, she needs to check on her best friend. Her twat blocking best friend. Lexa tangles her fingers into Clarke’s blonde locks, tugging to get the other girl’s attention. Clarke lets out a growl of frustration before moving from between her legs. She moves up Lexa’s body, straddling the brunette’s hips. Her eyes are almost black, pupils blown in arousal. She looks very annoyed, and if Lexa wasn’t completely frustrated, she might find it adorable.

_“I am assuming that someone is dead. Otherwise you would have to be crazy to stop me right now.”_

_“Sorry. It’s just; did you hear the commotion out in the living room?”_

_“Nope. My attention was focused elsewhere, sorry.”_

_“I think that Raven and Anya were fighting.”_

_“Is that your way of telling me that we have to stop? Because I’m not sure that I like that idea at all.”_

_“I’m sorry.”_

_“Fine, but once we figure out what’s going on, I expect payment in the form of orgasms.”_

_“You?”_ A perfectly sculpted eyebrow tips upwards at Clarke’s words. _“If I recall correctly, you already received payment.”_

 _“Ugh, come on Lexie…”_ Clarke rolls her hips down into Lexa’s, both girls moaning at the contact. _“Do you really want to stop?”_

_“God, Clarke…no. But you know that we need to.”_

_“Our friends suck. I swear we are turning our phones off when we go on our road trip.”_

Lexa’s hands come to rest on Clarke’s naked hips. She sits herself up with Clarke still in her lap so that she can kiss the blonde softly. Clarke sighs into the kiss, returning it with equal fervor. It’s when Clarke’s hips start to move against hers that she breaks away, groaning at how wet the blonde is. She could easily get carried away and continue what she started, but Lexa knows that she needs to check on Anya. She rests her forehead against Clarke’s with a sigh, enjoying the closeness of the other girl for a moment longer before they face the real world.

_“Alright, my blonde sex goddess, let’s go check on our kids.”_

_“Hey. The only child that I agreed to raise with you right now is a fur baby and he is sleeping in his kennel like the good boy that he is.”_

_“Yeah, but our adult children won’t survive without us. They’re all idiots.”_

_“True.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

In all the years that Lexa has known Anya, she can count on one hand the amount of times that she’s seen her best friend cry.

The scene that Lexa walks into when she leaves her bedroom, clad in a tiny pair of boy shorts and a tank top is unsettling to say the least. Anya is huddled in the corner of the couch, knees pressed tightly against her chest. She has tears streaming down her face.

 _“Ahn?”_ Lexa calls out softly as she makes her way over to the couch.

Anya’s only response is to press her face into her knees as a pained sob leaves her mouth. Lexa takes a seat next to Anya and immediately wraps an arm around her hunched shoulders. They sit there for some time, Lexa just holding Anya while she cries. She registers her door opening at some point, Clarke walking out to join them, wearing a pair of Lexa’s boxers and an old Garbage t-shirt.

 _“Ahn?”_ Lexa tries again when she hears Anya’s cries settle.

 _“What?”_ Anya croaks out, voice watery with her tears.

_“What happened?”_

_“Oh please, I’m sure that you heard everything.”_

_“No. We heard yelling and the front door slamming, but that’s about it.”_

_“It’s Raven.”_

_“Yeah, I gathered that much. What happened?”_

_“We got into an argument about kids.”_

_“What? Why?”_

_“Because she doesn’t want them.”_ Clarke answers before Anya can.

Clarke can’t help but feel terribly uncomfortable right now as she watches Lexa comfort her best friend.

She feels a sharp pang of pain in her chest as she thinks about Raven. Her best friend has her reasons for not wanting kids, and in Clarke’s opinion, they are valid reasons. She probably went about this conversation in the wrong way and turned it into a fight when she didn’t need to, but she still feels for Raven.

First she screwed up with Octavia and they still haven’t talked, and now she’s in hot water with her girlfriend.

She needs to make sure that Raven is alright. This has definitely not been a good week for her. She takes a deep breath as she unlocks her cell phone.

**_Princess Griffers: Rae?_ **

**_Rae Bae: What?_ **

**_Princess Griffers: Are you okay?_ **

**_Rae Bae: I’m fine, Princess._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Are you sure?_ **

**_Rae Bae: YUP. Just fuckin’ peachy._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Come on, I know you better than you think Rae. You’re not okay. Lex and I heard you guys arguing._ **

**_Rae Bae: It’s whatever dude. Not a big deal. I’m just fucking up everything in my life right now. As per usual for Raven Reyes._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Are you at the dorm?_ **

**_Rae Bae: Where else would I be? My girlfriend hates me and Octavia is avoiding me like the plague. I’m just going to lay here in my bed and die._ **

**_Princess Griffers: That’s….a little dramatic, don’t you think?_ **

**_Rae Bae: You don’t get an opinion in this, Princess. You aren’t in my shoes right now._ **

**_Princess Griffers: No, but I know what you’re going through. I don’t like the fact that you’re hurting right now._ **

**_Rae Bae: Just go back to your girlfriend. I’m going to finish this moonshine and hopefully die of alcohol poisoning._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Okay, I’m coming home._ **

**_Rae Bae: No! Just stay over at Lexa’s place. I’m fine._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Stop lying to me before I kick your ass. I’ll be home in twenty minutes._ **

**_Rae Bae: Whatever._ **

Clarke exits out of her conversation with Raven, switching over so that she can text Octavia.

**_Princess Griffers: O…_ **

**_Mama O: What’s up?_ **

Clarke takes a deep breath, willing her hands to stop shaking. This can go one of two ways. She will either get her head bitten off by her best friend and wind up in the doghouse with Raven, or O will forgive Raven quickly. Clarke is really hoping for the latter.

**_Princess Griffers: Okay, we need to talk about Rae._ **

**_Mama O: I don’t want to talk about her._ **

**_Princess Griffers: I know. I understand that you’re still mad at her. And you have every right to be. But we have a bigger problem right now._ **

**_Mama O: Bigger problems than one of my best friends betraying my trust?_ **

**_Princess Griffers: OMG. You and Raven are so freaking dramatic. I know that you and Lincoln made up. You need to talk to her and let her apologize._ **

**_Mama O: I don’t have to do anything._ **

**_Princess Griffers: O, stop being an asshole for two seconds so that I can fucking talk to you please._ **

**_Mama O: What?_ **

**_Princess Griffers: Rae got into an argument with Anya._ **

**_Mama O: Okay? And?_ **

**_Princess Griffers: They were talking about you and Lincoln._ **

**_Mama O: What about us?_ **

**_Princess Griffers: About you being pregnant._ **

**_Mama O: Okay._ **

**_Princess Griffers: I don’t know the whole story but I am assuming that Anya brought up wanting to have kids._ **

**_Mama O: No…._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Yes._ **

**_Mama O: Did Raven tell her about her mom?_ **

**_Princess Griffers: Honestly? I don’t know. I don’t think so but I can’t be sure._ **

**_Mama O: Oh man._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Yeah. So as far as I know, they got into a huge argument about it. Raven left the apartment and went back to our dorm room._ **

**_Mama O: Have you been able to get a hold of her?_ **

**_Princess Griffers: Yeah. It’s bad, O. Really bad._ **

**_Mama O: Crap. Are you going to go check on her?_ **

**_Princess Griffers: Yeah. I’m about to leave Lexa’s apartment._ **

**_Mama O: I’ll meet you there._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Are you sure?_ **

**_Mama O: Yeah. She’s still my best friend._ **

**_Princess Griffers: Okay. I’ll see you there in a bit._ **

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Okay. I am not sure what we are going to walk into, but I doubt that it’s going to be good.”_ Clarke turns to face Octavia outside of her dorm room.

_“I’m sure that it’s going to be bad. Remember the last time she heard from her mom? We had to literally pull her out of a puddle of her own vomit. I’m pretty sure that she drank for a week straight.”_

_“Well, let’s hope that it’s not that bad. Ready?”_

_“Yup.”_

Clarke turns the key in the lock, opening the door as quietly as possible. She and Octavia both take deep breaths before walking into the room.

The room is completely dark when they walk in, lights off and curtains drawn. It takes a minute for their eyes to adjust to the darkness.

They find Raven curled up in the fetal position in her bed, Monty’s moonshine clutched in her hands. Clarke can hear the soft sniffles of her best friend crying and it absolutely breaks her heart. Looking over at Octavia, Clarke can tell that she is feeling the same way.

 _“Rae?”_ Octavia whispers softly as she walks cautiously towards Raven’s bed. Raven doesn’t respond to her best friend’s voice, soft cries the only sign that she is awake and listening.

Octavia wants to be mad at Raven, she really does. She still feels slightly betrayed by her best friend, but right now, her concern is for Raven’s wellbeing is winning over.

The last time she saw Raven this broken up was when her mom showed up on campus last year. They were never able to figure out how Tracy found Raven, but somehow she did. She was high as a kite when she stood outside of Raven’s dorm, waiting for her daughter to get of class.

By the time Clarke got back to the dorm, the damage had been done. Raven’s mother was nowhere to be seen, but Raven was an absolute mess. The dorm was in shambles, every single one of Raven’s possessions destroyed in a fit of rage. Raven had chugged an entire mason jar of Monty’s moonshine and had passed out from the amount of alcohol that she had consumed in such a short period of time.

Clarke called O in a panic and the two of them had to literally keep her from drowning in her own vomit. They didn’t ask any questions for fear of sending her spiraling even further down into whatever funk she was experiencing. Instead they held her while she cried and continued to clean up after her when they came home from class to find her belligerently drunk.

This behavior went on for a little over a week before Raven snapped out of it. She still wouldn’t talk about it, but both Clarke and Octavia knew that it had something to do with her mom.

Neither girl is eager to relive this nor judging by the items that are littering the floor, Raven is teetering on the edge of another breakdown.

Steeling her nerves, Octavia slips into the small full bed behind her best friend. She curls her body around Raven’s balled up form, slinging her arm over the other girl’s waist. Raven stiffens slightly before letting out a loud sob. Octavia sighs deeply; nuzzling her face into the crook of Raven’s neck.

 _“Rae?”_ Octavia whispers into Raven’s ear. She feels the other side of the mattress dip as Clarke crawls into the bed as well. Clarke’s arm wraps around Raven’s waist, resting right below Octavia’s.

 _“O…”_ Raven’s voice is raspy, rough from not being used. She attempts to turn so that she can face Octavia, but the way that her friends are holding her prevents her from moving. So, she uncurls her body from itself so that Clarke and Octavia can snuggle closer to her instead. _“I’m so sorry.”_

_“Shhh. Don’t worry about it.”_

_“I fucked up.”_

_“I forgive you.”_

_“You don’t have to say that to make me feel better.”_

_“I’m not. I really do forgive you.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because you’re my best friend and I love you. I will always forgive you.”_

_“I love you too.”_

_“Do you want to talk about it?”_

_“No.”_

_“Okay, that’s fine. We can just lay here.”_

The three lie there in silence, Raven’s soft sniffles the only sound in the room. After ten minutes of complete silence, Clarke and Octavia are pretty sure that Raven has fallen asleep. As they allow sleep to start to take over their bodies, they hear Raven’s scratchy voice once again.

_“Guys? I’m really fucking drunk right now.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“I’m never drinking moonshine again.”_

_“You say that every single time.”_ Clarke laughs as she hands Raven a brown paper bag.

_“I mean it this time.”_

_“Sure you do. Eat what’s in that bag.”_

_“What is it?”_

_“Something greasy.”_

_“Ugh, that sounds terrible.”_

_“It will help.”_

_“Doubt it,”_ Raven responds as she pulls a foil wrapped item out of the brown bag. She pulls the foil off of the burrito, her stomach protesting at the smell of food. She reluctantly takes a bite because she knows that it will help, but she chews it without enthusiasm. Of course Clarke is right because her stomach settles after only a few bites.

 _“Oh my god, what is that smell?”_ Octavia sits up in Raven’s bed, fingers wiping sleepily at her eyes.

 _“It’s a burrito.”_ Clarke replies

_“That smells like death.”_

_“You love burritos from Sancho’s.”_

_“Apparently the baby doesn’t. I’m just going to…”_ Octavia’s eyes widen as she bolts out of the bed, making a beeline for the bathroom.

_“And so it begins.”_

_“Hey, you should be glad that I’m not throwing up too.”_

_“I’m so glad that I’m not cleaning up after both of you. Not that I haven’t done it before. Eat your breakfast.”_

_“Yes, mom.”_

_“So, are you going to tell me what happened last night?”_

Raven stops mid-bite at Clarke’s question. Her dark brown eyes flit up to meet Clarke’s. She narrows them slightly as she violently bites her burrito.

_“No.”_

_“Rae, you need to talk about it.”_

_“Leave it alone, Clarke.”_

_“No. I won’t let you shut down, Raven.”_

_“God. You’re such an asshole.”_

_“She’s right. You need to talk to us.”_

Octavia plops back down on Raven’s bed, reclining back with a sigh.

_“What is there to talk about?”_

_“A lot of things. Why don’t you start at the beginning?”_

_“Well, Anya was in a group message with Lexa and Lincoln. After Princess pulled Lexa out of the conversation to butter her muffin I asked Anya if you and Lincoln had made up. She told me that things were good now. I thought that was going to be the end of the conversation so I turned my attention back to the television. After a few minutes she asked me if I wanted kids. I tried to steer the conversation away from answering her so that I could avoid the inevitable fight that it would cause, but she kept asking. I finally told her that I didn’t want kids. Instead of just letting the conversation drop right there, she started pushing me for answers. I started to think about my mom and things in my head got really dark. It’s kind of a blur, but I told her to back the fuck off. At some point she called me a coward and told me not to leave. I felt like she was giving me an ultimatum. So I left.”_

_“Rae, I’m sorry. And I totally don’t want to sound like an insensitive asshole right now, but why didn’t you tell her about your mom?”_

_“I don’t know, O. Honestly, I probably should’ve. By the time I thought about it, we were arguing pretty heavily and I was so upset that I couldn’t form the words. I just kept egging her on, making things worse.”_

_“Yeah, I’m sure that if you go see her and apologize, she’ll forgive you.”_

_“It doesn’t matter. It’s not going to work out. She wants kids and I don’t. Even if it’s not an issue right now, eventually it will be. I just need to end things before it gets to that point.”_

_“That’s kind of a rash decision, don’t you think?”_

_“I agree with Clarke, Rae.”_

_“What do you guys know, your relationships are perfect.”_

_“Far from it. I’m seeing a girl that is terribly afraid of commitment. It took me how long to actually get her to agree to go on a date with me?”_

_“Yeah, but you guys are crazy about each other. Things will work out between you two.”_

_“Rae, Anya loves you. There is no way that she would break up with you just because you don’t want kids. Especially if she knew the reason why.”_

_“O’s right. I was texting Lexa while I was waiting for our food and Anya’s been a mess since last night.”_

_“I don’t know. I need time.”_

_“Don’t take too long. We don’t want you to lose her over something so petty.”_

_“I don’t want to lose her either.”_

_“So girl the hell up and talk to her. O and I had to force you to tell us about your mom. And that was after we spent a week cleaning up your vomit.”_

_“Ugh. Please don’t say vomit, Clarke. The bean doesn’t like that word.”_

_“The bean?”_ Raven looks over at Octavia questioningly.

_“Yes.”_

_“O, you should just call it what it is. Zygote.”_

_“No. Absolutely not, Clarke. That word is terrible.”_

_“But Bean is better?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Whatever.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Hey sexy bartender.”_

_“Please. What’s sexy about having a job where you are constantly wet?”_

Clarke doesn’t realize her mistake until Lexa cocks an eyebrow at her in amusement.

_“Are you telling me that you’re wet right now, Clarke?”_

The glass that Clarke is holding slips out of her hand and crashes to the floor, shattering upon impact. Lexa laughs lightly at the look on Clarke’s face, shaking her head as she takes a long drink of her beer.

_“Shit.”_

_“Is that a yes?”_

_“Um…”_

_“Have I ever told you that you’re adorable when you’re flustered?”_

_“Shut up. Are you guys having fun?”_

_“Yeah. Bellamy and Echo are great. Things are hella awkward with Raven and Anya both at the table. They’re making sad, lovey eyes at each other but they haven’t talked at all.”_

_“They just need time.”_

_“Plus I miss my blonde sex goddess.”_

_“We were literally together like five hours ago.”_

_“Watching ‘The Incredibles’ hardly counts as being together.”_

_“Hey. Just because you slept doesn’t mean that we didn’t spend any time together.”_

_“I was bored.”_

_“I’m sorry.”_

_“It’s okay. I know that you love that movie. I told you that I am not a huge movie fan. Plus when you invited me over, I thought that we were going to pick up where we left off the other day.”_

_“Well, that was the original plan, but I didn’t expect Raven to be in the room the whole time.”_

_“It’s seriously fine. I’m used to us being interrupted by now.”_

Clarke leans over the bar top, her hands coming up to cup Lexa’s cheeks. She pulls their faces together so that she can capture Lexa’s lips in a sweet kiss. Lexa responds immediately, moving her lips against Clarke’s. They both pull away at the same time, slightly breathless.

_“It’s time for my break. Are you busy right now?”_

_“Hmmm. I don’t know. I’ve had my eye on this super hot blonde. But she’s been ignoring me all night.”_

_“She’d have to be a fool to ignore you.”_

_“I agree. “_

_“Well, I know a super hot blonde that would love to spend some time with you.”_

_“Oh yeah?”_

_“Mmhmm.”_ Clarke comes out from behind the bar counter, smiling widely at Lexa. She grabs the brunette’s hand and interlaces their fingers. She walks to the side of the bar, tugging on Lexa’s hand so that the brunette will follow her. They come up to a nondescript brown door, which Clarke immediately opens.

Lexa doesn’t even time to look around the room because Clarke immediately pushes her against the door. Hungry lips capture hers as Clarke’s hands grip Lexa’s hips. Clarke’s kisses are rushed but still passionate as they move away from Lexa’s mouth. Heated kisses are placed at the corner of her mouth and her jawline before moving to her neck.

 _“Clarke…”_ Lexa’s hands come to find purchase on Clarke’s shoulders. She intended on pushing Clarke away, really she did. Until she felt Clarke’s teeth scrape against her pulse. Instead she pulls on Clarke’s shoulders in an attempt to pull their bodies closer together.

 _“Hmm?”_ Clarke nips sharply at Lexa’s carotid artery, eliciting a sharp hiss out of the brunette.

_“Are you sure that we have time for this?”_

_“Oh, we have plenty of time.”_

Clarke’s mouth eagerly returns to Lexa’s neck, as her hands slide confidently down the brunette’s body. Her jeans are undone hastily, Clarke’s hand deftly slipping underneath the fabric.

Lexa’s lacy panties are the only thing keeping Clarke from what she wants and if she’s being honest, they’re not doing a very good job. She can feel just how wet the brunette is through the flimsy barrier and it makes her groan against Lexa’s neck. As much as she wants to drag this out until Lexa is a squirming, writhing mess underneath her, she knows that they don’t have the time right now. She is being completely irresponsible at work, after all.

It’s totally not her fault that she can’t seem to keep her hands off of Lexa. At least that is what she is going to keep telling herself.

**-Get it together Griffin, you don’t have all day. You have an amazingly hot girl pinned up against a door practically begging you to make her feel good. Quit making her wait dammit!-**

Clarke nudges Lexa’s thigh with her knee, making the brunette spread her legs a bit. She pushes Lexa’s panties to the side so that she can slide her fingers through slick folds. Lexa bites down sharply on Clarke’s shoulder to muffle her cry of pleasure.

_“Fuck, Lexie, you’re so wet.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa has always prided herself on her patience. She has always been able to keep a cool head under pressure.

That was until one Clarke Griffin came into her life.

The blonde can unravel Lexa with just one look. And the way that she is looking at Lexa right now is doing all sorts of things to the brunette. Like the way that her brow is furrowed in concentration as she works to unbutton Lexa’s jeans. Or the way that she is biting down on her bottom lip, worrying the skin between her teeth.

It makes Lexa feel out of control. And while she would normally hate feeling like she has no control over her actions, but right now, she loves it.  She revels in the feeling of Clarke’s fingers trailing down her stomach as her hand slips underneath her jeans.

The first touch of Clarke’s fingers against her bare skin awakens something inside of Lexa and before she can second guess herself, she grabs Clarke’s wrist and pulls her hand out of her jeans.

_“Lex, what…”_

Clarke’s words are cut off with a squeak as Lexa uses her wrist to spin her around so that she can press the blonde into the door. Clarke’s body hits the solid wood with a thud and for a second Lexa worries that she might have hurt the other girl. Until Lexa sees Clarke’s blue eyes darken with arousal.

That look alone is enough to spur Lexa on. She makes quick work of Clarke’s skintight jeans, pulling them down so that she has enough room to work. She presses her lips insistently against Clarke’s as her hand moves down the blonde’s stomach. She can feel Clarke’s abdominal muscles contract as her nails rake against them.

The first touch of her hand against Clarke’s center makes Lexa moan against the blonde’s lips. Clarke is unbelievably wet right now. She slides the flimsy fabric of Clarke’s underwear to the side so that there are no more barriers between them.

She knows that they don’t have time for slow, and right now, she doesn’t want to go slow.

Clarke bites down harshly on her bottom lip as she circles the blonde’s clit with her index finger. She uses her free hand so that she can wrap Clarke’s left leg around her waist. The movement causes her fingers to slip down further, teasing the blonde’s entrance. Clarke moans against Lexa’s mouth as she slides her index finger inside of the blonde. Lexa deepens the kiss, slipping her tongue inside of Clarke’s mouth.

The fluttering of Clarke’s walls against her finger tells Lexa that the blonde probably isn’t going to last very long. She pulls her index finger almost all of the way out, adding a second finger on her next thrust. Clarke’s head falls back against the door with a soft thud, breaking their kiss.

 _“You seem to have a thing about getting fucked while you’re at work, don’t you Clarke?”_ Lexa slips her thigh in-between Clarke’s legs. She grinds her thigh into her hand on her next thrust, pressing her palm against Clarke’s clit.

 _“Maybe,”_ Clarke groans out, her eyes screwing shut as Lexa thrusts into her forcefully.

 _“Tell me,”_ Lexa leans forward so that she can bite down on Clarke’s collarbones. _“Did you ever bring Harper here so that she could fuck you against this door?”_

_“No.”_

_“No?”_

_“No.”_

_“I bet that she never made you feel as good as I do.”_ Lexa accentuates the end of her sentence with a sharp cant of her hips. _“Did she, Clarke?”_

_“God, no.”_

Lexa kisses her way up Clarke’s chest until she reaches the blonde’s neck. She nips at Clarke’s pulse point, curling her fingers as she thrusts into the blonde. She feels Clarke’s walls tighten slightly around her fingers, signaling that she is getting close to her orgasm. Lexa slows down her ministrations, making Clarke groan in frustration.

 _“Lexa, please….”_ Clarke rolls her hips against Lexa’s hand in search of friction.

 _“Please what, Clarke?”_ Lexa whispers into Clarke’s pulse point, her lips rubbing softly against the sensitive skin.

_Please…so close…”_

_“Close to what?”_ Lexa moves away from Clarke’s neck so that she can bite down on her earlobe. The action causes Clarke to let out a loud moan, making Lexa laugh huskily into her ear.

_“Wanna come….”_

_“I bet you do. The real question is, am I going to let you?”_

_“Lex…”_

Lexa can’t help but tease Clarke a little bit. She loves the desperate tone to the blonde’s voice when she is practically begging for something. Especially when they are being intimate. The power that Clarke hands over to Lexa when she becomes a writhing, wanton mess is exhilarating to her.

Normally she would drag this on until Clarke couldn’t take it anymore. And she is very tempted to do so, even though she knows that they are pressed for time.

The way that Clarke’s hips are undulating as she chases her climax is mesmerizing and Lexa can’t find it in herself to deny the blonde anything in this moment. With a newfound eagerness she thrusts her fingers back into the blonde, curling them at the end. She bites down on Clarke’s earlobe once more before moving back up to the blonde’s lips.

 _“Come for me, Clarke,”_ is the last thing she says to Clarke before slamming their lips together.

The sensation of Lexa’s tongue thrusting into her mouth in time with her fingers is what sends Clarke over the edge. Stars burst behind her eyes as she is overtaken by the most powerful orgasm in her life. She is pretty sure that if Lexa didn’t kiss her, she would’ve screamed loud enough for the entire bar to hear her. Instead, Lexa’s soft mouth muffles her scream as the brunette continues to thrust into her slowly, prolonging her already overwhelming orgasm.

Clarke pushes her hand against Lexa’s shoulder when the sensitivity gets to be too much. Lexa reluctantly pulls away, making both of them groan at the loss.

Clarke can’t really trust herself to stand unassisted right now, so she keeps her leg hooked around Lexa’s waist while she catches her breath.

_“Jesus, Lexa.”_

_“Hmm?”_

Clarke’s eyes flit up to meet Lexa’s, a mischievous glint staring back at her.

_“That was…wow…”_

_“Mmmhmmm..”_

Clarke’s eyes widen as Lexa puts her fingers into her mouth to clean them, pulling them back out with an audible ‘pop.’ Lexa winks at Clarke, a smirk plastered on her face. She gently moves Clarke’s leg to the floor, making sure that the blonde can hold her own weight before releasing her grip. She presses her lips softly against Clarke’s, her hands coming up to rest on the blonde’s hips. Clarke groans as she tastes herself on Lexa’s lips. The kiss ends way too abruptly for Clarke’s liking, Lexa pulling away so that she can pull the blonde’s jeans back up. She gives Clarke one more chaste kiss as she buttons and zips up her jeans. This time when Lexa pulls away, it’s to make sure they are completely decent. She offers Clarke a wicked smile as she goes to open the door.

_“Break time’s up.”_

_“But, what about you?”_

_“Hmmm, later.”_

**~*~*~*~*~*TBC~*~*~*~*~***

 

**Translations:**

**Bushhada - Coward.**

**Sha Heda - Yes Commander.**

**Os, Linkon. NODOTAIM!!! - Good, Lincoln. AGAIN!!!**

**Ai Niron - My Lover.**

**Os dula, Joka - Good job, Fucker.**

**Shof op, Nomajoka - Shut up, Motherfucker.**

**Chil au, goufa - Children, calm down.**

**Chil daun - Stand down**

**Branwada - Fool.**

**Mami - Penis**

**Skai Hainofi - Sky Princess.**

**Ron ai ridiyo op - Speak true.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you thought lovelies.... :D


	15. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The road trip begins!
> 
> Anya and Raven do not cope well without each other. But these two are hella stubborn. Who will break first?
> 
> No Linctavia and baby right now. But we will see them again soon.
> 
> Clexa's first official date!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay, first off, let me apologize for taking so long. Life has kicked my butt recently. Between work, family stuff, and being sick, I haven’t had the time or energy to get much writing done. But after two grueling months of struggling with this chapter, I have finally finished it. I made myself stay up way past my bedtime to get the last bit written and all 42 pages formatted so that you all could have this update for Thanksgiving. I know that this holiday can be an incredibly stressful one. Whether you are having to survive homophobic family members that do not accept you for who you are. Or if you are still hiding who you are out of fear. Or maybe it’s neither of those. Maybe you’re just hanging out with your family and you’re stressed. Because who doesn’t eventually get stressed out while hanging out with their families? I know that I do. I hope that this update helps you deal with the stresses of family and that it was worth the way too long wait.  
> A big thank you goes out to my pal Randomme103 for putting up with me. And for proofreading the majority of this so that it doesn’t seem like too much of a hot mess.  
> As always, thanks for reading! Let me know what you think!   
> Happy Thanksgiving!   
> ~*~*~*~*~*

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Barista’s Choice**

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Chapter 14**

**~*~*~*~*~***

 

_“Did you pack your outfit for the wedding?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“And did you pack enough clothes for the whole time?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“You have your laptop? Phone? Charger?”_

_“Yes mom.”_

_“I’m just making sure that you have everything Lex. Don’t be an asshole.”_

_“I know Anya. I’m sorry, I’m just nervous.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because I’m about to go on a road trip with Clarke.”_

Anya looks up from her phone, where she is no doubt playing tap titans. She rolls her eyes at her best friend, who is gnawing nervously on her thumbnail as her eyes scan the book in her hands.

_“Dude, you’re going to make yourself bleed. I thought that you stopped chewing on your nails when we were in high school.”_

_“I did.”_

_“Yeah, okay.”_ Anya sets her phone down on Lexa’s nightstand with a sigh. _“Lexa. I don’t get why you are so nervous about this road trip. It’s just Clarke.”_

_“Just Clarke?”_

_“Yes Lex. You guys have been attached at the hip for months now. Why is it such a big deal to be alone with her now?”_

_“I don’t know.”_ Lexa briefly meets Anya’s questioning gaze before dropping her eyes back to her book. It’s a good thing that she’s read this book more than once because she’s just absentmindedly turning pages right now. Her mind is stuck on this trip. She’s bursting with excitement about hanging out with just Clarke for three weeks, no needy friends to bug them. At the same time, every single time she thinks about spending time with Clarke without their friends as buffers, her stomach erupts with nerve inducing butterflies.

It’s stupid to be nervous about this road trip. Anya’s right, she and Clarke have spent a lot of time together, especially in the last two weeks.

If she really stops and thinks about it, it’s not just the being alone with Clarke thing. Yeah, that’s a big portion of it, but there are many other factors that are adding to her already monumental pile of nerves. She’s going be in Clarke’s hometown, surrounded by the people that the blonde grew up with. She’s going to be introduced to people that Clarke considers her family. Not to mention that she’s likely going to be meeting Clarke’s mom. That thought fills her more with anger than it does nerves. She’s not sure that she is going to be able to censor herself when she meets Abby Griffin. She’s liable to start yelling at the woman for abandoning her only child. She’s not looking forward to meeting the woman that has caused the girl that she cares for so much pain.

Never mind the negatives about this trip. She’s going to try and focus on the positives. She gets to spend uninterrupted time with Clarke. They get to sightsee and take their time on their drive to San Diego. She’s going to get to take Clarke out on dates and properly court the blonde, even though they’ve already cracked under the monumental amount of sexual tension that they harbor towards each other. If she counts last night, they’ve cracked under the pressure on four separate occasions now. Not that she’s complaining about it, because she’s definitely not. She’s just super excited about the prospect of being able to take Clarke out on dates. Or of the chance that maybe one day, hopefully soon, she’ll be able to call the blonde her girlfriend.

The idea that she actually wants Clarke to be her girlfriend is another thing that excites and terrifies the shit out of her. After losing Costia, Lexa swore to herself that she would never open up her heart to another person again. Clarke didn’t really give her much of a choice, even though Lexa tried like hell to fight it.

_“Lexa?”_

_“Hmm?”_

_“Did you hear what I said?”_

_“No.”_

_“I said that you had better drive carefully.”_

_“We will be careful. I promise.”_

_“I know.”_

_“What are you going to do while I’m gone?”_

_“I dunno. I’ll probably spend a lot of time working. My mom has been bugging me about coming home to visit but I haven’t decided if I want to go home without you yet.”_

_“You should. We didn’t get to go home last summer because of my internship. It would probably be nice for you to get out of here for a little while, considering everything that’s been going on as of late.”_

_“Yeah, you’re probably right.”_ Anya looks up from her phone, meeting Lexa’s concerned gaze.

_“Have you heard from her?”_

_“No. It’s probably over.”_

_“There’s no way. You guys are crazy about each other.”_

_“It doesn’t matter. You didn’t see her, Lexa. She just completely shut down on me and then left. She wouldn’t even talk to me.”_

_“Have you tried to call her?”_

_“No.”_

_“Why not?”_

_“I don’t know. I was giving her time. Obviously there is a reason why she reacted the way that she did and she’s not ready to tell me.”_

_“It’ll work out.”_

_“I hope you’re right. I miss her already.”_

_“You’re such a sap, Anya.”_ Lexa chuckles lightly, turning her eyes back to the page that she’s been reading for the entirety of this conversation.

_“You have no room to talk, Commander Heart Eyes.”_

_“Shut up.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

When Lexa walks into Clarke’s dorm later that morning, the room is completely dark. The curtains are drawn and all of the lights are off. If it wasn’t for Clarke telling her that Raven had been holed up in her room since her fight with Anya, Lexa wouldn’t have thought that the brunette was home. The room is completely silent, not even the sounds of breathing are heard, leading Lexa to believe that Raven is probably awake. Her suspicions are confirmed when a pained groan comes from the otherwise lifeless lump in the middle of Raven’s bed. Lexa sets Clarke’s room key down on Raven’s nightstand as she moves to sit down on the lumpy mattress.

_“I told you Clarke, I’m not going to get out of bed today. I don’t feel like it.”_

_“Not Clarke.”_

Raven pulls her comforter back slightly, just enough so that one of her eyes is visible. She eyes Lexa warily.

_“What are you doing here, Lexa?”_

_“I came here to check on you.”_

_“I’m fine.”_

_“Clearly. When’s the last time you got out of bed?”_

_“I don’t need you to come check on me. Tell your best friend that I’m fine.”_

_“Anya didn’t send me.”_

_“Clarke then?”_

_“No. I came here on my own. I mean, I borrowed Clarke’s key but I told her that I left something in here that I needed for our trip tomorrow.”_

_“So, why are you really here?”_

_“I told you, I came to check on you.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because I know that you’re not okay.”_

_“You don’t know anything Lexa. Now, I’m not really feeling up for company, so feel free to leave.”_

Lexa raises her eyebrows in shock at the angry tone of Raven’s voice. Even when she was arguing with Anya, she didn’t sound this mad. She brings a hand to the blanket, tentatively pulling on the fabric. Raven resists at first, attempting to keep most of her face covered up. After a few determined pulls, Raven relinquishes control with a sigh, loosening her grip on the comforter. Lexa pulls the blanket away from Raven’s face so that she can get a good look at her best friend’s girlfriend.

Raven looks just as bad as Anya does. Her eyes are bloodshot, puffy from crying. She has deep, dark bags under her eyes, telling Lexa that she probably hasn’t slept in a few days. Her hair is an absolute mess, tangled and matted against her scalp. She looks a wreck and it makes Lexa’s heart clench painfully in her chest.

She’s not terribly close with Raven, but she doesn’t like seeing Clarke’s best friend in pain. Plus she feels like Raven might have a good reason for the argument that she had with Anya. Lexa could probably ask Clarke why Raven is so against having children, but she doesn’t want to invade the other girl’s privacy in that way.

_“You look like shit, Raven.”_

_“Thanks.”_ Raven laughs sarcastically. _“Asshole.”_

Lexa smiles softly at Raven, settling down in the small bed next to her. She lets the silence of the room wash over her, waiting for Raven to start the conversation.

_“So, how’s Anya?”_

_“About the same as you.”_

_“So, not good then.”_

_“Not at all.”_

_“I don’t know what she told you….”_

_“Raven, the only reason that I’m here is because I don’t want you to be alone.”_

_“Why? We’re not even really friends.”_

_“I know that, but you still deserve to have somebody in your corner.”_

_“Shouldn’t you be comforting your best friend instead of her girlfriend, ex, whatever?”_

_“She’ll be alright. I’m more worried about you.”_

_“I don’t know what you’re talking about…”_

_“Look Raven, I’m not going to pretend that I know everything that happened between the two of you, but I’m guessing that it had something to do with O and Lincoln?”_

_“You really don’t know?”_

_“No, I swear.”_

_“I’m surprised that Clarke hasn’t told you.”_

_“It’s not really her business to talk about you to me.”_

_“It’s just fucked up, you know?”_

_“What is?”_

_“The way that Lincoln reacted to the news.”_

_“Well, he was surprised about it. I can understand the shock.”_

_“That’s not exactly what I meant. It’s just; I don’t ever want the baby to feel unwanted.”_

_“Is that what you think was going through his head?”_

_“No…”_ Raven sighs loudly, running her fingers through her tangled locks. _“I don’t know.”_

_“You can talk to me, you know.”_

_“I know. It just kinda upset me, because I know what it’s like to feel unwanted.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“Like, I know that they are really young to be starting a family. And I get that that is totally scary. I completely understand that. My mom was sixteen when I was born. She got drunk and slept with some guy at a party and made me. Having a baby when she was so young was not easy for her and she ended up getting hooked on drugs. My grandma tried to help, but she was in poor health. Eventually, child services took me away. But not before one of her horrible boyfriends got ahold of me. Luckily, he wasn’t a child molester. He just liked to get really high and beat the shit out of me.”_

_“Raven, I’m so sorry.”_

_“Don’t be. I’m fine for the most part. I just really don’t like to talk about my childhood and Anya had to try and push me to open up.”_

_“I know that I didn’t go through the same things that you did, but I know what it feels like to be unwanted.”_

Raven laughs sardonically at the brunette. _“I doubt that.”_

_“No, I do. I have a wonderful mother, trust me. She did a great job raising me. But she did so alone because I am the product of a deadbeat dad that didn’t want a damn thing to do with me.”_

_“Where is he now?”_

_“I have no idea. I haven’t tried to look for him. He didn’t want me; I definitely don’t want anything to do with him.”_

_“I’m sorry Lexa.”_

_“It’s okay. I’m sorry that you had it rough growing up.”_

_“It’s whatever. Can’t change the past.”_

_“Yeah, but you can change the future.”_ Lexa turns her body so that she is facing Raven. She reaches out so that she can grab Raven’s hand. _“I get that opening yourself up and being vulnerable is terrifying, but sometimes the reward is worth the risk. I’m not telling you to run to Anya and tell her that you want to have her baby. But letting her know why you’re afraid is something that you both deserve.”_

_“I know. I’m just scared.”_

_“And that’s okay. But is losing everything that you guys worked for worth a little bit of fear?”_

_“No, I suppose not.”_

_“Didn’t think so. Now I’m going to leave you alone to figure things out because I have to go finish packing. Just so you know, there is a possibility that Anya might go home for the summer, so I wouldn’t wait too long before you woman up and go talk to her.”_

_“Thanks.”_

_“You’re welcome Raven. I’ll see you in a couple of weeks.”_

_“Sure, sure. Make sure you take care of Clarke while you guys are on vacation.”_

_“Will do.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Whoever decided that five a.m. was an acceptable time for anything should be hung upside down and beaten like a piñata.”_ Clarke groans as she shoves her duffel bag in the trunk of the rental car. Lexa eyes her with a smile, leaning against the driver’s side door. Her sunglasses are perched on the top of her head, hair thrown up in a messy bun. Clarke lets out a dramatically loud yawn, causing Lexa to chuckle softly. Lexa laughs softly, shaking her head at Clarke’s flair for the dramatic, especially this early in the morning. She glances into the window, taking in the sight of Fish snoozing away in the backseat. Apparently he shares the same opinion of mornings as his other mom.

_“Don’t you have to be at work at like four thirty when you open the café?”_

_“It’s different when I’m getting paid for it.”_

_“You’re so grumpy in the morning.”_

_“Sorry that I’m not Robo Barbie, who gets up at the buttcrack of dawn. Willingly.”_

Lexa chuckles at the frown on Clarke’s face. She toys with the hem of her tank top before lifting it up slightly so that her abs are on display. Clarke’s eyes widen and darken significantly as she takes in the sight of Lexa’s toned stomach.

_“Well, getting up at the buttcrack of dawn is the reason why my body looks like this. So, maybe you shouldn’t complain.”_

_“Eh, you look alright.”_

Lexa’s perfectly sculpted eyebrows raise in surprise. She saunters over to Clarke with determination in her eyes. She reaches out to grab Clarke’s hands so that she can pull their bodies closer together. Clarke lets out a breathy whine as Lexa runs her hands across her bare stomach.

_“Just alright?”_

Lexa has to fight back a groan as Clarke’s nails rake across her abs. She can’t stop herself from leaning forward to kiss the blonde. The kiss is soft and short, because she’s still trying to make a point dammit.

_“Yeah, I mean, they’re okay abs.”_

_“Alright grumpy pants, you are definitely not getting the coffee that I bought for you when I went for my run this morning.”_

_“Of course you went for a run this morning. What time did you even get up?”_

_“I got up at three.”_

_“No way.”_

_“Yes way.”_

_“I didn’t even feel you get out of bed.”_

_“Well, you sleep like the dead for one. And even if you were a light sleeper, I did keep you up pretty late last night.”_

_“Yeah, but that doesn’t explain why you got up so early.”_

_“I don’t really require a lot of sleep. Plus, somebody had to make sure that we were all packed up and ready to go.”_

_“You’re one of those people who is a stickler for being on time and has an itinerary planned out for their vacation, aren’t you?”_

_“Yup, no coffee for you.”_

_“But Leeexxxxiiieeee…I need caffeine or else I’ll die.”_

_“Well, you should’ve thought about that before you started being a sassy alligator.”_

_“Hmmmppp. You’re mean.”_

_“Oh well. I get two cups of coffee.”_

_“Jerk.”_

_“Are you ready to hit the road, Princess?”_

_“As ready as I’ll ever be.”_

_“Awesome. Let’s get settled in because our first stop is actually out of the way of the rest of our trip.”_

_“Where are we going first?”_

_“San Fran.”_

Clarke lets out a squeal as she pulls out of Lexa’s embrace. She immediately makes her way over to the passenger side of the rental, quickly slipping into the car. Lexa chuckles softly, slamming the trunk of the car closed before making her way over to the driver’s side. She slips her sunglasses over her eyes as she settles into the seat.

Clarke has already pilfered the other cup of coffee and is gulping down the hot beverage greedily. Her shoeless feet are perched on top of the dashboard of the car. Lexa thinks that she looks absolutely adorable. Tired, but adorable nonetheless. Lexa buckles her seatbelt and starts the car. She plugs her phone into the usb cord in the console and flicks through her phone until she finds the playlist that she made for this trip.

The soft music begins to play through the Bluetooth in the car, startling Clarke slightly. Lexa laughs as she types something into her phone. A few seconds later a computerized voice speaks directions through the car. Lexa looks over at Clarke once more, smiling softly at the blonde. Clarke offers a shy smile in return, before turning her attention back to her coffee.

_“Let’s hit the road then, milady.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Are we there yet?”_

_“No, we aren’t there yet, Clarke.”_

_“Buuuutttt, I’m bored.”_

_“You shouldn’t be. This is literally a forty minute drive and we’ve only been on the road for twenty.”_

_“Yeah, but I’m still bored.”_

_“Is this how it’s going to be for the whole trip? Because I will leave you somewhere on the coast. Or you can go sit in the back and hang out with Fish.”_

Lexa turns her head so that she can glance at Clarke. She can’t stop the laugh from bubbling out of her mouth as she takes in the pout on the blonde’s lips. She shakes her head as she turns her attention back to the road.

_“That’s just mean, and Fish is sleeping.”_

_“Because he is a good road trip buddy. Unlike a certain blonde I know.”_

_“You suck. I can’t believe that you would leave me stranded on the side of the road.”_

_“I wouldn’t leave you on the side of the road.”_

_“I know.”_

_“I’d find a nice beach to desert you on.”_

_“Lexa!!”_

_“I’m kidding Clarke.”_

_“Nope…”_ Clarke huffs as she crosses her arms over her chest. _“I’m totally not talking to you.”_

_“We’ll see how long that lasts.”_

Lexa continues to drive with only the soft music in the air to entertain her. She knows that Clarke can’t manage the silence for long, but she’ll play this game with the blonde until she cracks. She lets out a soft sigh, drumming her fingers against the steering wheel.

Clarke manages to keep silent for a whopping ten minutes, much to Lexa’s surprise. They are only about ten minutes away from their destination when Lexa can hear the barely audible huff come out of Clarke’s mouth.

_“What’s wrong?”_

_“Nothing.”_

_“I know that you’re bored Clarke. I promise you that we are almost there.”_

_“That’s not it, Lexie. I mean, yeah, that’s part of it. But I was just thinking that I have no idea what plans you have for us out here in San Fran.”_

_“You know that I can’t tell you my plans. That would ruin the surprises that I have planned.”_

_“Ugh, that’s the worst thing ever.”_

_“You are so freaking dramatic, Clarke.”_

_“You love it.”_

_“Maybe.”_

_“There’s no maybe about it. But now for a serious question.”_

_“Yes?”_

_“Are we there yet?”_

_“CLARKE!!!”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Lexie, there is no way that I can afford to pay for half of this room. It’s way too nice.”_

The room is probably the nicest hotel that Clarke has ever seen. Paying for one night likely costs more than Clarke brought for the whole trip. Just looking around the room makes her feel anxious, because she knows that there is no way that she can help Lexa pay for it. She can feel her nerves start to take over, making it hard to think straight. She carefully sets Fish down on the plush carpet, hoping like hell he doesn’t decide to turn the room into his own personal bathroom. He takes off in an uncoordinated run, sniffing every single crevice that he can reach.

 _“Clarke.”_ Lexa places a reassuring hand on Clarke’s shoulder. _“You don’t have to worry about that. I already paid for it.”_

Clarke hangs her head in shame at Lexa’s statement. It’s not Lexa’s fault that she has money and she never throws it in Clarke’s face. Still, Clarke can’t help but feel crappy about the fact that Lexa has spent so much money on this hotel room and is likely to spend a hell of a lot more. She lets out a breath that she didn’t realize she was holding when she feels Lexa’s fingers grip her chin.

_“Hey. Why are you crying?”_

_“What?”_

_“Why are you crying, Clarke?”_

_“I’m not.”_

Lexa runs her thumb under Clarke’s eyes softly, collecting the moisture that has apparently decided to make its presence known. Stupid, ridiculous emotions.

_“So why are you upset?”_

_“It’s stupid.”_

_“I’m sure that it’s not.”_

_“It’s just, I don’t have the money to put us up in nice hotels like this one.”_

_“So?”_

_“And you do. It makes me feel shitty that you are paying for this nice room and I can’t…”_

_“Oh, Clarke. Is that what these tears are about?”_

_“Maybe.”_

_“Honey.”_ Lexa tilts Clarke’s head up so that she can press a lingering kiss to the blonde’s forehead. _“It doesn’t matter. It’s just a hotel room. It’s just money.”_

_“It does though. This room cost way too much.”_

_“Clarke, seriously? It wasn’t even that much, I promise.”_

_“Don’t lie to me, Lexa. I may be like super broke now, but I do come from a family that is pretty well off. I’m not saying that we are staying at the Ritz Carlton or anything, but this is far from a crappy motel.”_

_“So? I wanted to stay in a nicer hotel. Plus Anya’s uncle Ryder owns this chain of hotel, so I didn’t pay nearly as much as you would think.”_

_“Still..”_

_“Clarke, listen to me. My mom has money, yes. Because of that, I am never hurting for anything. I can understand if that makes you uncomfortable, but I don’t care about it. At all. But one thing that I don’t want to ever do is make you feel uncomfortable, so if you want to leave and go find a less fancy hotel, we will do just that.”_

Ugh. Just when Clarke thinks that Lexa couldn’t get any more perfect, she has to go and say sweet crap like that.

_“No, Lex, it’s fine. I just get a little bit weird about money. I’m sorry.”_

_“It’s fine. Now, do you want to take a nap before we head out to Fisherman’s Wharf?”_

_“Yes. It’s like you read my mind.”_

Clarke flops down on one of the beds with a loud sigh.

_“Why’d you get a room with two beds?”_

Lexa looks completely flustered by the question. She rubs at the back of her neck uncomfortably, eyes focused on the floor.

Embarrassed Lexa is pretty damn adorable and Clarke would be lying if she said that she didn’t enjoy seeing the other woman so flustered.

_“Oh, um, well. I didn’t want to assume anything. So, I thought that it would be a good idea.”_

_“You do realize that we’ve slept together, right?”_

_“Yeah, but…”_

_“Lex, stop being so damn caviler. We’ve slept together, multiple times mind you. And even when you were adamant about us only being friends, we still cuddled in bed together.”_

_“I know.”_

_“You’re so damn cute.”_

_“I’m not cute, I’m a badass.”_

_“Maybe everybody else thinks that, but I know the truth. Now come over here and cuddle with me, you cute badass, you.”_

_“Whatever you say, Cuddle Slut.”_

_“Ohhh, Cuddle Slut. I like it. You know how to flirt with a girl, Woods.”_

_“Shush.”_

_“You love it.”_

Clarke smiles sleepily at Lexa, holding her arms open to the other woman. Lexa grins back at Clarke before slipping into the bad next to the blonde. She settles into Clarke’s arms, pressing her back against Clarke’s front.

Clarke’s arms slide down Lexa’s body to circle her waist. They tighten around her middle, pulling their bodies flush together. Clarke sighs softly, nuzzling her face into Lexa’s neck.

The warmth of Clarke’s body instantly makes Lexa feel drowsy. She is vaguely aware of Fish settling in at the end of the bed. It’s not long before she feels Clarke’s breathing even out, signaling that the other girl has fallen into slumber.

_“Your mom is going to be the death of me, Fish.”_

At the sound of his name, Fish lifts his head off of the bed, bright blue eyes look in Lexa’s direction. She smiles at him as her eyes drift closed.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Anya POV**

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Hey mom.”_ Anya calls out as the Skype call connects with her mother. The older woman’s smile fills her laptop as Anya’s face appears on the other screen.

_“Hey baby. How are you?”_

_“I’m okay. How are you doing?”_

_“I’m good.”_

_“That’s good. How’s dad?”_ Anya pushes her glasses up on her face so that she can actually see her mom. Her eyes are puffy and irritated from crying so much these past couple of days that she hasn’t been able to wear her contacts. She’s fairly certain that she looks an absolute mess, and she can’t remember the last time that she got out of bed. Lexa has only been gone for a few hours, but it feels like it’s been days.

_“Your father is fine dear. Working as always. I swear that Nyko never knows when to quit. Are you sure that you’re alright, dear? You look tired.”_

_“It’s nothing that you need to worry about, mom.”_

_“Really, Anya? I’m your mother. It’s my job to worry about you.”_

_“It’s just girl trouble.”_

_“Oh? So, it’s about that girl Raven that you still haven’t let me meet.”_

_“It’s not exactly meeting if you do it through Skype.”_

_“Yes it is. If I can see her face and threaten her if she screws things up, it counts.”_

Anya smiles slightly at her mother’s protective words.

_“Whatever. It doesn’t matter anymore.”_

Anya can feel her eyes burn with tears and she is so exhausted that she can’t stop them from falling. She lets out a small sniffle as she tries to keep her mother from seeing the tears.

_“Oh baby, are you crying?”_

_“No mom,”_ Anya scoffs as she rubs her fingers under her glasses to hastily wipe away her tears, _“don’t be ridiculous.”_

_“Anya Yujleda, do not lie to me.”_

_“I’m fine mom. I actually called you for a reason.”_

_“We can talk about that in a minute. Tell me what is bothering you.”_

_“I don’t want to talk about it.”_

_“Well, I don’t care. You’d better stop being a little shit and talk to me.”_

_“I’m pretty sure that Raven and I broke up.”_

That thought still manages to make Anya’s heart clench painfully in her chest. She wants so badly to see Raven again, to beg for forgiveness. Her stubborn pride won’t allow her to concede defeat, so she’s stuck in this hellish limbo until Raven comes to her. Knowing how stubborn the fiery Latina that she has come to love is, she’ll probably be waiting for a long time, if it even happens at all.

Obviously, communication isn’t their strongest suit.

_“Anya? Did I lose you?”_

_“No mom, I’m still here. Sorry. I haven’t been getting a lot of sleep.”_

_“Baby. You need to sleep.”_

_“I know, it’s not for a lack of trying, believe me.”_

_“Whatever’s going on between you two, it’ll work out.”_

_“I hope so.”_

_“It will. Mother knows best after all.”_

_“Whatever mom.”_ Anya’s laughs slightly and she has to admit that it feels kind of good. She hasn’t really done anything but cry since her fight with Raven. _“I actually called to ask you something.”_

_“What’s up, Buttercup?”_

_“Do you and dad have any big plans this summer?”_

_“Not really. Lily and I were planning on going to a couple of those wine and paint nights. Other than that, not much is happening. Why do you ask?”_

_“I was thinking about coming home for a bit.”_

_“That would be wonderful. You know that we’d love to have you at home.”_

_“Yeah. I just need to get away, you know? With Lex being gone on her road trip with Clarke and Raven and I fighting, I just don’t want to be here right now.”_

_“I can understand that baby. When do you think that you’ll be coming home?”_

_“I’ll probably leave here in a couple of days.”_

_“ALLIE??? Are you home?”_

Anya jumps slightly as she hears Lexa’s mom’s voice crackle through her laptop speakers. Her mom turns her head towards the sound while still staying on camera.

_“In the kitchen, Lily.”_

_“Hey.”_

_“Hey, what are you up to? I just came over to see if you wanted to go get some lunch since Nyko went into work today.”_

_“Hey mama Woods.”_ Anya calls out as Lily sits down at the dining room table next to her mom.

_“Hello dear. How are you? You look tired.”_

_“I’ve been better.”_

_“I’m sorry honey.”_

_“It’s okay. Anyway, I’ll let you guys go get lunch. I’ll be home in a few days.”_

_“Okay baby. Drive safe. We’ll see you soon.”_

_“Okay mom. Love you guys.”_

_“We love you too.”_

Anya shuts her laptop as the Skype call disconnects. Running her fingers through her incredibly tangled hair, she lets out a soft sigh.

Her heart aches. It feels as if somebody has the organ securely fastened in a c clamp, tightening it with each breath that she takes. She wants so badly to call Raven, if anything just to hear the other woman’s voice. The only thing stopping her from picking up her phone and making the call is the fact that she is incredibly hurt.

She may have said some things that didn’t help matters during their argument, but Raven is the one that ran away. Maybe she shouldn’t have pushed her girlfriend like she did, but Raven could’ve stood her ground and stayed. Even if she just yelled at Anya to shut up, she didn’t have to leave.

Raven has to apologize first, because she walked away.

They’ve had complete radio silence for the better part of a week. Each day that passes by without a word from Raven leaves Anya completely hopeless of any sort of reconciliation. So she’s going to do what she does best, compartmentalize her feelings.

Maybe going home for the summer is as bad as Raven running away. Maybe she is as big of a coward as she accused Raven of being. But right now, she can’t bring herself to care.

She needs to leave, even if it is only temporary. If she stays in Stanford, she’s only going to mope. She’ll likely stay in bed or on the couch for the next two and half months until school starts again. She’ll pine and mope and she definitely doesn’t want to do that. She needs to get her mind off of Raven, if only for just a minute.

Going home will allow that. Her parents will help distract her from her heartbreak. She can help her mom around the house or at the flower shop that she owns. Even though the flower shop is more of Lexa’s thing. If that doesn’t help, she can go hang out with her dad at his practice.

Her father is an often sought out doctor in the Portland area. He is a pioneer for more natural approaches to modern medicine.

When Anya was growing up, her father talked about her joining the medical field with him when she was older.

She didn’t quite go the same route as him, opting for a double major of Psychology and Mathematics, but she still plans on pursuing her doctorate.

When she does manage to find the time to go home, she spends time at Nyko’s practice, mostly doing administrative work. It almost makes her wish that she had stuck with her original plan of pursuing medicine. Almost, but not quite, because she loves her field of study.

Before she met Raven, she thought that she had it all. She had her wonderful parents and she had her best friend. She hadn’t really dated since her last break-up her sophomore year of college.

Roan Azgeda was her last relationship.

He was cocky and kind of rude, and Anya fell absolutely head over heels in love with him.

She met Roan at a party her freshman year. He was in his senior year. Lexa was still home in Portland, finishing up her senior year of high school.

Anya was alone in California, fresh out of high school. She was absolutely terrified being on her own. Roan was the first person that she met. He laid the charm on thick when he sauntered over to her at the party, two red solo cups in hand.

The following year and a half of her life was spent with Roan.

It wasn’t until the middle of her sophomore year that found out what a skeeze he really was.

She took Lexa to her first college party, intent on showing her best friend a good time. Lexa was resistant to coming with to say the least. She was more comfortable holed up in Anya’s apartment. She had a dorm room, as was campus policy for freshmen, but she spent little to no time there.

And boy did she pick a doozy of a party to force her best friend to come to. They were only two drinks in when Anya decided to go look for her boyfriend.

Lexa had warned her about Roan. She said that there was something about him that she didn’t trust, but of course Anya is stubborn and didn’t believe her best friend.

As it turns out, Lexa was right, as she often is.

She shouldn’t have been surprised when she walked in on him screwing another girl, but somehow she was. She left the room without uttering a word, making sure to slam the door behind her.

Lexa didn’t ask any questions as Anya practically ran down the stairs. She just silently followed her best friend out of the house. Anya managed to keep it together until they made it to her apartment. It wasn’t until Lexa pulled her in for a hug that she lost control of her emotions. The tears were running down her cheeks before she knew what was happening.

After breaking things off with Roan, Anya dove headfirst into her studies. She was adamant about not putting herself out there again, her reasoning being that she didn’t have time for a frivolous activity like dating.

She was doing really well too, until Raven Reyes stormed into her life.

They haven’t even been together for very long but she was pretty sure that Raven was it for her.

She’s become so used to having Raven in her life in such a short amount of time, that she doesn’t know quite how to live without her in it.

That’s the reason why she has to leave. Having Raven so close yet so far away is absolutely killing her. She feels like she’s drowning and she doesn’t know how to break the surface.

Her fingers itch with the need to call Raven. Her arms ache to be wrapped around her girlfriend’s waist. Her heart aches with the desire to have Raven back and at this point she would be happy to accept any capacity.

She won’t break though.

Something has to give eventually. She just has to hope that they end up together at the finish line.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Raven POV**

**~*~*~*~*~***

4 days and 8 hours. 6,240 minutes. 348,480 seconds. That’s how long it’s been since she last saw Anya. She misses her girlfriend more than she thought was possible. Every single fiber of her being hurts, shattered beyond repair.

Apologizing to Anya is literally just a phone call or a short walk away, but for some reason she can’t bring herself to grovel. She knows that she was in the wrong, regardless of how hurt she was. She shouldn’t have stormed out in the middle of their fight.

Talking about her family life is not something that comes easily to Raven. It’s always struck a nerve with her.

Finn grew up with her, so he knew the clusterfuck that was her childhood.

Clarke and Octavia pushed her to talk about it. There was a lot of yelling and many items smashed against the walls of her and Clarke’s dorm room. It took them two weeks to get her to break, but they were persistent. She cried in the arms of her best friends after reliving the horrors of growing up with her mother.

She felt a lot better after sharing, but she felt laid bare, completely vulnerable. The wounds left open after talking about her life were raw and bleeding and it took a long time for them to heal.

So, she wasn’t really keen on slicing herself open again. In retrospect, she probably should have taken the proverbial knife and plunged it into her heart. Opening the old wounds back up would’ve saved a lot of heartbreak in the long run, but she was exactly what Anya called her. A COWARD.

She’s always considered herself to be strong. Surviving a drug addict mother and her countless junkie boyfriends. Making it through years in foster care, mostly unscathed. At the end of the day she made it out alive, counting the days until she could leave foster care all together.

The last foster family that she lived with was the best one the she’d been with. They treated her as if she was their own child, even going so far as buying her a car when she graduated high school.

Raven couldn’t see how great they were at the time, because she was incredibly jaded by all the negative experiences that she’d had with other families. She lashed out as often as she could and made their lives as miserable as possible. It didn’t matter to them, they still treated her amazingly well.

On the night of her eighteenth birthday, she went out to a party with her foster brother Atom. As much as she wanted to celebrate her upcoming freedom, she made the choice to stay sober since she had to drive home later. Had she known what was going to happen that night, she might’ve tossed a few drinks back.

Atom was rip-roaringly wasted on the drive home. All he did was bitch about his parents and how strict they were. The only reason why they got to go to the party in the first place is because they snuck out.

Raven really wanted to punch him in the face to get him to shut up, because at least he had parents that gave half a shit about him.

She only took her eyes off of the road for a split second so that she could slug Atom in the arm for touching her radio for the millionth time. That minute amount of time was just enough to destroy two lives.

A drunk driver on the opposite side of the road swerved into Raven’s lane. She saw the headlights racing towards her but she didn’t have enough time to react. The car slammed head first into her car. She later found out that the other driver was pushing close to sixty miles per hour in a forty mile per hour zone.

The impact from the other car completely smashed the front end of Raven’s car. The steering wheel broke both of her legs. She didn’t understand why she didn’t feel any pain from the impact. It wasn’t until she got to the hospital they broke the news to her.

A piece of metal from the driver’s side door broke off and lodged itself in her spine. The nerve endings that were severed were connected to the feeling in her legs. They told her that she would never regain feeling in her legs, not to mention walk again.

Atom on the other hand wasn’t so lucky. Raven made him buckle his seatbelt before they left the party but at some point during the drive home he must have taken it off. The force of the impact sent him flying through the windshield. His body slammed onto the hood of the other car, killing him instantly.

The doctors told Raven that she was lucky. They said that even with her seatbelt on, she should have died in the accident. Not only was the impact enough to kill her, she was pinned underneath the steering column for almost three hours, bleeding the entire time.

The worst part of the whole thing? The drunk asshole that killed her foster brother and practically crippled her escaped with only a few scratches and a broken wrist.

Her brother didn’t even get to live to see his eighteenth birthday, she would probably never walk again and this fucktard gets to go on his happy way.

So why is it that Raven can take almost losing her ability to walk, her foster brother dying, and living in deplorable conditions? But she can’t open up to the woman that she loves and share her deepest fear. It doesn’t make any sense to her. Maybe that’s why she’s so frustrated. Because yeah it’s painful to relive the memories, but that’s all they are, memories. She has had minimal contact with her mother since she went into the system and she still has weekly phone calls with Atom’s parents.

So, for the life of her, she cannot figure out why she’s being so damn difficult about this whole thing.

She’s picked up her phone countless times in the last four days, typing out message after message before closing the draft. She almost sent the last message, but she chickened out at the last second.

Grabbing her phone off of her bedside table with a huff, she opens the message thread that she has with Clarke and Octavia.

_Rae Bae: I miss you bitches._

_Mama O: Who changed my nickname?_

_Rae Bae: It wasn’t me._

_Princess Griffers: It was me, but it was totally Lexa’s idea._

_Mama O: Clarke Jane Griffin, you suck!!! And I totally don’t believe that it was Lexa’s idea._

_Princess Griffers: It SO was._

_Mama O: Stop throwing your girlfriend under the bus._

_Princess Griffers: It’s the truth and she’s not my girlfriend._

_Rae Bae: Can we not talk about girlfriends right now?_

_Mama O: You still haven’t called her? What the hell, Rae?!?!_

_Princess Griffers: Yeah, what the fuck?!?!_

_Rae Bae: I don’t know….I can’t call her._

_Mama O: You’re being an idiot, Raven. Girl up and call her for fucks sake._

_Princess Griffers: Raven, she misses you._

_Rae Bae: It doesn’t matter. It’s over._

_Princess Griffers: It doesn’t have to be. She would easily forgive you, but the longer you wait, the harder it’s going to be._

_Mama O: Clarke’s right, Rae. Just call her or go to her apartment and grovel._

_Rae Bae: I’m scared._

_Mama O: GIRL UP!!!_

_Princess Griffers: GIRL UP!!!_

_Rae Bae: It’s not that easy._

_Princess Griffers: But it is. Now, as much as I would love to try and convince you to call your fucking girlfriend to apologize. I have a very attractive brunette in bed with me and SOME of us GIRL up and admit to our mistakes._

_Rae Bae: Harsh, Griff._

_Princess Griffers: I’m not sorry. You will be so upset if you lose her. Especially over something so stupid._

_Mama O: PREACH SISTER!!! Now get off of your ass and go get your girl back. I am going to lay back down because 7 a.m. is an ungodly hour to text your friends._

_Rae Bae: Fine! Just abandon me in the middle of a crisis. Some best friends you two are._

_Princess Griffers: Need we remind you that this crisis is completely your fault? So, excuse us for not coddling you, Raven._

_Mama O: As bitchy as that sounded, she’s right. This could’ve been easily avoided if you had just talked to her._

_Rae Bae: Okay, okay. YOU GUYS WIN. I’LL CALL HER._

_Princess Griffers: Good idea, but I’d probably wait a couple of hours. It’s a little early for life altering phone calls._

Raven exits out of the message thread without replying. She sets her phone on her stomach, closing her eyes with a sigh.

She startles awake when she feels her phone vibrate on her abdomen. She doesn’t remember falling asleep, but the clock on her phone tells her that she’s been out for almost two hours.

She has a new text message from Clarke.

_Princess Griffers: Anya’s awake now. She just got off of the phone with Lexa. Now would be a good time to call._

_Rae Bae: I don’t know if I can do it._

_Princess Griffers: Now’s not the time to chicken out._

_Rae Bae: I…._

_Princess Griffers: Look, you need to do this. I know that Lexa told you that Anya might go home for the summer. I didn’t want to be the one to break it to you, but she just told Lexa that she is leaving in two days. Don’t let her leave thinking that you guys are broken up._

_Rae Bae: She’s leaving?_

_Princess Griffers: Wouldn’t you?_

_Rae Bae: I gotta call her._

_Princess Griffers: JFC!!! It’s about time. GO! Call her!_

_Rae Bae: Okay, okay. Love you!!!_

_Princess Griffers: Love you too babe! GO get your girl back!_

_“Okay, Reyes.  Girl up. It’s just a phone call. You can do this.”_

Raven exits out of the message, opening her contact list. She pulls up Anya’s contact info, pressing the phone icon before she can talk herself out of it.

The anticipation of the first rings almost kills her. She has absolutely no idea what she’s going to say if Anya picks up the call.

The second ring isn’t much better. She can feel her heart beating in her ear, pumping blood through her body at an alarming rate. She’s so fucking nervous and she doesn’t know if it’s anticipation of Anya answering her call, or fear that she won’t.

By the third ring she’s pretty much given up hope. She royally fucked up and now she has to deal with the consequences. She’s lost the love of her life over something so incredibly stupid.

_“Raven? Hello?"_

_“Anya?”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Lexa POV**

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Did you know that the fortune cookie was invented in San Francisco?”_ Lexa says around her bite of omelette.

 _“Why am I not surprised that you know random facts about San Francisco?”_ Clarke chuckles as she swallows her bite of French toast.

 _“I like random facts.”_ Lexa shrugs, smiling softly at Clarke as she cuts another piece of her omelette. She lifts her fork in the air, offering the bite to Clarke. Clarke smiles, opening her mouth so that Lexa can feed her the bite. Clarke chews the bite thoughtfully, smirking as Lexa’s eyes zero in on her lips. _“It’s good right?”_

_“Mmmhmm. So good.”_

_“You should have ordered an omelette.”_

_“Oh, I regret nothing. This French toast is on point. You want a bite?”_

_“Sure.”_

Clarke scoops up a bite of her French toast and carefully moves her fork towards Lexa’s mouth. Lexa chews the bite quickly, swallowing the food with a slight grimace.

_“That’s really sweet.”_

_“It’s good though.”_

_“It’s like crazy sweet. Sometimes I don’t know how you don’t have type two diabetes. Or how you’re not morbidly obese. Your diet is absolutely atrocious, Clarke.”_

_“I exercise regularly. I don’t drink soda. I usually only have one cup of coffee a day. Plus, I guess that I just have good genes.”_

_“I can’t argue with that.”_

_“Charmer.”_

_“Haven’t I told you? Charmer is my middle name.”_

_Is it now?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Okay, Alexandria Jasmin Woods.”_

_“Oh, you did not just full name me, Clarke Jane Griffin.”_

_“I’m pretty sure that I just did.”_

_“It’s so on, Princess.”_ Lexa reaches over, dipping her finger into the syrup on Clarke’s plate. She takes her syrup covered finger and smears it across the tip of Clarke’s nose.

 _“LEXA!!!”_ Clarke leans back so that Lexa can’t reach her face anymore. She lets out a squeal as Lexa lunges forward to swipe at her cheek. _“Stop!!!”_

 _“You started it.”_ Lexa laughs as she licks the syrup off of her finger. Clarke looks completely stunning as she mockingly glares at Lexa. She opted not to put any makeup on before they left for breakfast, stating that it was too early for such frivolous things. Her fare skin is spattered with small freckles. The slightly brisk morning air has reddened her cheeks. She has sunglasses resting on top of her messily pinned up hair, golden locks still glistening from her shower. Lexa wants to kiss her until they are both breathless.

_“Did not.”_

_“That’s what you get for full naming me.”_

_“That was just uncalled for.”_ Clarke juts out her bottom lip as she wipes the sticky syrup off of her face.

_“Awww, don’t pout, Princess.”_

One more glance at Clarke’s adorable pout sends Lexa’s heart into overdrive. She needs to feel Clarke’s lips on hers, immediately. Leaning forward, she grips the back of Clarke’s neck, fingertips tickling the soft baby hairs. She gently pulls Clarke’s face towards her, pressing their lips together.

Clarke’s lips are sweet, inviting and warm. They taste like maple syrup, chocolate and berries.

Every time she kisses Clarke it’s like the first time. She feels it with her entire body, sparks jolting through every nerve ending. Her heart triples in speed, pounding a staccato rhythm against her ribcage. Her palms start to sweat and she gets lightheaded, in the best way possible.

If it were humanly possible, she would be okay with kissing Clarke all the time.

It’s moments like these that make her forget why she was so resistant to give Clarke a chance.

It’s in the way that Clarke looks at her when she thinks that Lexa isn’t paying attention. The lingering glances and the soft touches.

Lexa’s pretty sure that Clarke is in love with her. It terrifies the living shit out of her but it’s also exhilarating at the same time. She knows that she cares deeply for Clarke, even though they aren’t together. She’s certain that it wouldn’t take much for her to fall over the edge and fall in love with blonde. The idea of opening herself up to the possibility of being completely heartbroken again makes her sick to her stomach.

Enough of the scary commitment stuff. What she should be focusing on right now is the soft press of Clarke’s lips against her own. And the insistent way that Clarke is trying to deepen the kiss, her tongue running against her bottom lip.

Lexa smiles into the kiss before pulling away. She presses another kiss softly against the corner of Clarke’s mouth as she sits up.

_“As much as I would love to continue this, we’re in public.”_

_“So what?”_

_“So, I would like to sightsee at some point today seeing as this is our only day in the city before we head out in the morning.”_

_“Or we could go back to the hotel room.”_ Clarke waggles her eyebrows suggestively, making Lexa laugh heartily.

_“Really, Clarke?”_

_“You started it. Kissing me like that should be illegal.”_

_“You’re insatiable.”_

_“Sorry, not sorry.”_

_“So, are you excited for our adventures today?”_

_“Well I would be, but somebody is being super hush-hush about her plans.”_

_“I have to keep some secrets. It wouldn’t be fair if I told you about my plans to woo you, now would it?”_

_“Is that what you’re doing, Miss Woods?”_

_“I thought that I made my intentions of wooing you clear, Miss Griffin.”_

_“Hmm, I don’t recall that conversation ever happening. Maybe I need a reminder.”_

_“Is that so?”_ Lexa leans forward, closing the distance between her and Clarke. Their lips are so close that Lexa can feel Clarke’s breath wash over her face. She wants so badly to kiss Clarke again, but she doesn’t. She wants Clarke to make the first move this time.

She doesn’t know when she became so addicted to Clarke Griffin. It’s almost as if she craves having the blonde around her. If the date that she has meticulously planned for tonight goes well, she plans on asking Clarke to make things official.

The idea of opening herself up to another relationship still terrifies the living crap out of her, but she knows that Clarke is worth it.

She just hopes that Clarke will catch her when she falls.

The warm press of Clarke’s lips against her own shakes Lexa out of her reverie. Her body immediately relaxes as she kisses Clarke back. Clarke’s hand curls underneath her chin in an attempt to pull her closer. The table between them makes the feat damn near impossible.

The simmering heat that always seems to surround them becomes almost scorching when Clarke bites down on Lexa’s bottom lip. Lexa can’t stop the gasp as it tumbles out of her mouth, only for it to be eagerly swallowed up by Clarke.

They aren’t close enough. Lexa wants to be closer to the blonde. To her utter dismay, she can’t get any closer to Clarke. Because something very solid is stopping her movements. She blindly reaches out so that she can move the object out of her way, only to drop her hand into something sticky.

Sticky? Why is her hand sticky now?

She pulls away from Clarke so that she can look down at her hand. Her hand is right in the middle of Clarke’s plate of French toast, surrounded by syrup.

Oh yeah. They are eating breakfast right now. In a very public place. Making out like two horny teenagers.

Clarke gazes down at the table to see what Lexa is looking at. She lets out a light, airy laugh as she looks down at Lexa’s hand, gripping her French toast like it is a lifeline.

_“Lex. I think that the French toast is dead. You can stop squeezing it now.”_

_“Shit.”_ Lexa quickly pulls her hand out of the sticky mess of a plate. _“I’m sorry.”_

_“It’s fine. I was finished anyway.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Clarke POV**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa Woods.

This girl is absolutely, one hundred percent going to be the death of her. Blue eyes look over the brunette across from her. Lexa looks absolutely adorable right now. Not that she doesn’t look adorable the majority of the time, but there is something more to it today. Her wavy brunette locks are tied up in a messy bun on top of her head. She is not wearing her contacts today, her black rimmed glasses resting on her nose. Her face is free of makeup, light freckles spattered across her cheeks. Clarke wants nothing more than to kiss Lexa senseless.

She’s spewing off some random fact about San Francisco while she chews her way too healthy breakfast and it absolutely makes Clarke melt. Lexa is so freaking adorable that Clarke can’t stand it.

Being around Lexa makes her feel like she’s never felt before. Before she met the brunette, it was as if she was just floating along in life. Her main focus was to finish school and hopefully make a comfortable living as an artist in California.

She may have been the one to pursue Lexa, but her heart didn’t really give her a choice.

As soon as she met Lexa, she was completely smitten. She just knew that she had to get to know the other girl. And when Lexa turned her down, Clarke still wanted to be in her life, if only as a friend.

Lexa offered her friendship, and she tried like hell to keep her feelings absolutely platonic.

It wasn’t long before that all went to shit. They weren’t destined to be only friends, of that much Clarke was sure.

From a very early age, she showed great artistic ability. Her father Jake nurtured and honed that ability. He told her that she had many of the notable characteristics of an artist. Being only eight years old at the time, she wasn’t really sure what her father meant.

The things he told her didn’t make sense at the time, but there was one that has always stuck with her. One trait that seems to correlate with her blatant inability to have Lexa as only her friend.

  * Artists are risk takers. Not to a reckless point, but risk takers nonetheless.



 

Clarke knew that trying to pursue Lexa was a huge risk. She weighed the pros and cons in her head for a week straight, trying to figure out what path was best. Being only Lexa’s friend was the safe route. Not opening up her heart to Lexa would protect her from inevitable heartbreak.

Before she knew about Costia, she knew that something big happened to Lexa. Something so soul crushing and terrible that it forced the brunette to put mile high concrete walls around her heart. Clarke could see it when she looked into Lexa’s eyes, forest green pools full of grief and despair. Even when Lexa smiled, there was pain behind the beauty.

Once Lexa opened up about her past pain, Clarke was floored. No wonder she had given up on pursuing a romantic relationship. After suffering the monumental amount of loss that she had, Clarke was surprised that Lexa was still able to stand.

Losing her father still weighed heavily on her heart and it had been ten years since the accident. Losing a parent wasn’t nearly the same as losing the person that you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with, but it was a loss nonetheless. Clarke understood how devastating such a loss was, and she completely understood why Lexa wasn’t keen on dating her. That lead her to the next characteristic.

FEAR. Fear is one of the most crippling emotions that a person can feel. Fear almost plays devil’s advocate in one’s life. It can keep you completely, physically safe at times, but it prevents you from experiencing the many wonderful things that life has to offer.

Artists aren’t completely fearless, but they don’t allow fear to hinder their experiences. They know that it is all part of the creative process and that mistakes are inevitable. The biggest difference is that an artist isn’t afraid to make a mistake. They know that even the most publicized piece of work has some flaw. Tiny as it may be, it is still there.

Most people stop at the first sign of imperfection. They get frustrated and give up completely, abandoning what might have been their best piece of work, all because of FEAR.

As an artist, Clarke is not afraid of making mistakes. She knows that there is nothing that she can do about them. Her finished work may look flawless, but she knows the flaws that lie beneath the paint. That doesn’t stop her from finishing her work, even if she knows that it won’t end up being perfect. It is still something beautiful, something that she created. And it deserves to be shared, even if it’s only by her family and friends.

In her personal relationships, she acts relatively the same. She loves fearlessly. Even if she knows that this is not her destiny and that there is inevitably going to be heartbreak. She does not let fear dictate what could be an amazing experience, even if she is scared.

She knows that Lexa is the complete opposite when it comes to matters of the heart. She’s reserved, closed off in a way. She must extensively calculate the pros and cons of a risk before she can decide to pursue it or not. Her analytical thought process is likely due to the severity of her loss, but Clarke can’t be too sure. She changed her major way before her psych rotation, after all.

Clarke was slightly jaded when it came to love.

She thought that she was in love with Finn. If anyone had asked her at the time, she would have vehemently insisted that she was in love. Thinking about it now, she knows that what they had was anything but love. Naivety is better fitting word.

What she has with Lexa feels like it could be so much more. She already cares about Lexa more than she thought possible.

Even with her closely guarded heart, Clarke can tell that Lexa cares about her. Being an artist, she’s always been more observant than most people. There was a certain sparkle that Lexa got in her eyes when she looked at Clarke.

The normally stoic brunette also tends to be a huge dork around Clarke.

Like right now, as she wipes her syrup covered fingers on Clarke’s cheek. It’s cold and sticky, and completely uncalled for. And it makes Clarke fall a little bit more in love with Lexa.

Love. Just thinking about that word makes Clarke’s heart beat faster. Deep down she knew that she was in love, but this is the first time that she’s openly admitted it to herself. It makes her breath catch in her throat as she watches Lexa lick maple syrup off of her finger. She’s pretty sure that she pouts, because she wants to blurt out how much she loves the brunette next to her.

**-Not a good idea, Griffin. Unless you want her to go running for the hills. You need to have some chill.-**

Her inner monologue is broken when she feels Lexa’s soft lips press against hers.

Kissing Lexa always feels like it’s the first time. It makes her heart race, her palms sweat and her brain turn to mush.

She would totally be okay with kissing Lexa for the rest of her life.

She’s diving headfirst into whatever this is between her and Lexa. All she can do it sit back and hope that she doesn’t get burned.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**General POV**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Okay, she was definitely freaking out.

Her day with Clarke was amazing.

After breakfast, they went to Fisherman’s Wharf and walked alongside the piers. It was just breezy enough that it forced the two women to cuddle up to each other as they walked side by side. Clarke looped her arm with Lexa’s, smiling softly at the brunette as they walked together.

They grabbed something small for lunch at Lexa’s insistence, so that they wouldn’t ruin their appetites for dinner.

Lexa had set up dinner reservations for the two of them at seven p.m. They headed back to the hotel around five so that they could get ready.

_“How is this going to work since we are sharing a room?”_

_“Well, you will get ready here in the room.”_

_“What about you?”_

_“Don’t worry about me, Clarke.”_

_“Okay. Since you won’t tell me what we’re doing tonight, will you at least tell me what kind of attire this evening requires?”_

_“The place that we are going to isn’t super fancy, so casual should be fine.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Positive. Now, this is where I leave you, Miss Griffin. I’ll be back to pick you up at six thirty.”_

_“Okay. I can’t wait.”_

_“I know. Same here.”_

Lexa places a chaste kiss on Clarke’s cheek before leaving the hotel room.

She makes her way down the hallway, stopping in front of another room. Anya’s uncle Ryder let her borrow this room to get ready for her date. She had the housekeeper move her duffle bag into this room after she was done cleaning her and Clarke’s room earlier.

She’s terribly nervous about this date. It’s ridiculous to think about, really. She’s already been intimate with Clarke, yet she’s afraid to go out on a date with her?

She wants to call Anya and ask for advice, but she won’t. Anya is busy dealing with her own stuff right now, she doesn’t need to deal with Lexa’s fear of dating.

Calling her mom is out of the question, because Lily would keep her on the phone long enough to make her late. It’s been a while since she’s had a proper conversation with her mom and she needs to catch her up on current events in her life.

Her last option seems kind of crazy, but she’s going to go with it.

One of the things that really helped Lexa when she first lost Costia was talking to her. She hasn’t told anybody about that phase in her life, because it makes her feel kind of crazy, but it did help.

She wasn’t delusional or in denial. She knew that Costia was gone. Somehow, talking to her recently deceased girlfriend helped her grieve.

Lexa was not religious by any means. She didn’t have any deity that she believed in enough to pray to every night. That didn’t stop her from believing that Costia was out there, somewhere, watching over her.

It started one night while she was in bed. To be honest, she’d been in bed for the better part of the last two months. She just couldn’t find the energy to pull herself out of her funk. She was grieving the loss of her girlfriend, damnit. If she wanted to stay in bed, she was totally justified.

Anya didn’t agree. The only time that Lexa got out of bed was to go to her classes. She would pull on whatever questionable article of clothing that she could find on her floor. She would cover her tangled hair with a beanie before pulling a hoodie on to complete her ‘homeless chic’ look.

After faking her way through whatever class she had that day, she made her way back to her apartment quickly, eager to go back to sleep.

Anya had other plans for her that day. After manhandling Lexa into the bathroom, she forced her best friend to take a shower and brush through the rat’s nest on top of her head. She borrowed Lexa something of hers to wear since all of her clothes were dirty. After settling her now furious best friend on the living room couch, Anya began her spiel.

_“Lex, you can’t live like this.”_

Lexa feels the tears welling up in her eyes, the rush of emotions sudden and overwhelming. She closes her eyes, shaking her head to try and clear the emotional turmoil wracking her body.

_“I know that you’re grieving. And I’m not telling you that you need to stop. What you went through is something that nobody should ever go through. But you can’t float along in life, barely living. Costia wouldn’t want this for you, Lexa.”_

_“Don’t. Don’t say her name.”_

_“It’s true.”_

The tears that she’s desperately been trying to hold back well over and start flowing down her cheeks. Anya’s right. As painful as it is to think about. Costia wouldn’t want her to continue on the way that she has been.  

_“I don’t know what to do, Anya.”_

_“I know, kid.”_

_“I miss her so much.”_

_“I know that you do.”_

Anya opens her arms so that Lexa can fall into them. She wraps her best friend up in a hug and settles them down on the couch, with Lexa resting on top of her. Her best friend isn’t one to cry often, so it makes Anya’s heart hurt to hear Lexa sob so openly. She knows that Lexa needs to cry it out, so all she can do is hold on and be by her best friend’s side.

At some point Lexa must’ve cried herself to sleep, because the next time she opens her eyes, it’s dark out. Anya isn’t on the couch with her anymore and the living room is completely dark aside from the soft glow from the television.

She squints as her eyes try and adjust to the minimal light in the room. There is a piece of paper propped up on the table with Anya’s loopy handwriting scrawled on it.

_Lex-_

_Had a group project that I had to go work on. I will probably be home late. I left you a sandwich in the fridge. Please eat something._

_See you in the morning,_

_Ahn-_

Lexa didn’t feel like eating, she just wanted to go to bed. She felt so emotionally exhausted. With a defeated sigh, she makes her way into her bedroom, making sure to leave the television on for when Anya gets home.

Her room is now clean, spotless and immaculate like she usually keeps it. It makes Lexa’s heart soar that Anya cleaned up her room while she was sleeping.

She plops down on her bed, intending on going right back to sleep. Her mind has other plans, however. She falls into a restless sleep, plagued by all too familiar nightmares. When she wakes up, tears streaming down her face, she has to remind herself that it was only a dream. That night was the first night that she talked out loud to Costia.

She knew that it was a crazy idea, but it really helped her. Just being able to get things off of her chest helped her sleep and eventually helped her grieve.

She hasn’t done this in over a year now, but it just feels like something that she needs to do.

Lexa pulls a slightly crumpled picture out of her wallet. It’s seen better days, but she can’t bring herself to get rid of it. She has a digital copy of the picture on her laptop, but this is the only physical copy that she has left.

The picture is of her and Costia on their first date. Lexa had planned out an elaborate picnic out in a field of wildflowers that she had come across one day. Looking at the picture still makes her cry to this day. She runs her fingers over the bent edges of the photo as she sits down carefully on the hotel bed.

Lexa never thought that the day would come when she would be willing to let Costia go. As sad as it may seem, she fully intended on spending the rest of her life alone. It almost feels like betrayal, to try and move on when Costia is gone. But deep down Lexa knows that Costia wouldn’t want her to spend the rest of her life alone. She would want Lexa to find somebody to do what she no longer could.

It’s way too early for Lexa to know if Clarke could be that person, but for the first time since Costia died, she’s willing to try.

 _“Hey Cos. It’s been awhile.”_ Lexa sucks in a deep breath as her eyes gloss over with tears. _“I..I miss you. I hope that you’re doing okay.”_ A sardonic laugh bubbles over, because she cannot believe that she just said that out loud. _“That was stupid. I guess that you’re doing as well as somebody can when they’re dead. I know that I haven’t done this in a while, and I’m sorry for that. School’s going really well. I only have one semester left before I graduate. I can’t believe it. It seems like only yesterday when you were forcing me to fill out applications for colleges. I didn’t even want to go to college right away. I wanted to go to Europe and go backpacking for a couple months. But you didn’t want to take a year off from school because the sooner we went to college, the sooner we could start our lives together. We fought about that for a week. You even ignored me while we were at school. That was our first real fight. I was so sure that you were going to break up with me over it. I called Anya that night and she came home that night. She told her professors that she had a family emergency.”_

Lexa laughs sadly at the memory, wiping the tears off of her cheeks. _“And then at the end of the week you came running down the hall while I was at my locker. You jumped into my arms and we both started crying and apologizing. That night I filled out my application for Stanford. I got early acceptance with a full academic scholarship and you went to Connecticut to go to Yale’s school of architecture. I was so proud of you for chasing after your dreams, even though we were going to be across the country from each other. I still think about it sometimes, that fight. I wish that I had pushed you harder to take a year off. I should have been more assertive because I feel like maybe if I had, you’d still be alive. I know that’s kind of ridiculous. But I can’t help but feel that way. Like maybe we would’ve grown closer on the trip…and then when you came out to visit me, maybe that night you would’ve said yes.”_

The tears are flowing freely now and Lexa knows that she needs to calm down so that her eyes aren’t puffy when she goes to pick up Clarke for their date. Clarke. Thinking about the blonde makes her smile.

_“Cos, I never thought this day would come. Honestly, I had no intention of trying to be in a relationship ever again. I was so sure that you were it for me and for a long time after your accident, that was still true. I need you to know that I met somebody. I tried to fight it at first, because it felt like I was betraying you in a way. The thing about this girl, Clarke, is that she is stubborn as hell. She wanted me from the very beginning and when I turned her down, she accepted it and told me that she would be happy with us just being friends. The funny thing was that we were probably the worst friends ever. There was an instant attraction between us and we found out that there was no way that we could be just friends. Something is still holding me back.”_

Lexa smiles sadly down at the picture, rubbing her thumb over Costia’s face.

_“So I guess the reason that I decided to talk to you today is because I need to let you go. You were my first everything. My first kiss, first girlfriend, first love, first lover and my first heartbreak. And I will NEVER forget you or stop loving you. But it’s time for me to move on. I’ve finally started healing and a lot of that is because of Clarke. She’s amazing, Cos. You would’ve really liked her. I want to give her a chance because I feel like we could have something amazing together. I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I miss out on this.”_

Oh god. This is so screwed up. Who talks to their dead ex-girlfriend about the new girl that they want to date? The weird thing though, is that it’s actually helping. Lexa feels lighter. Like she just had a giant weight lifted off of her shoulders. She’s still absolutely terrified about opening herself up for another potential heartbreak, but she just HAS to try.

_“I guess this is it. Thank you for five amazing years. I know that you said some things during our last fight about sleeping with somebody else. And I want you to know that I forgive you. I’m pretty sure that I forgave you immediately. I don’t know what would’ve happened between us if the accident didn’t happen, and unfortunately, we will never know. I am scared to move on, but I think that I’m ready. So this is goodbye.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Breathe in. Now breathe out, slowly. Good. These are good nerves. Calm, cool, collected. Who is she kidding? Clarke is about ten seconds away from losing it.

Lexa should be here to pick her up at any minute and she’s freaking out.

She’s so incredibly nervous and she doesn’t even know why. Okay, so maybe she does.

Yeah, she’s already had sex with Lexa. More than once. She’s been as intimate with her as is humanly possible. So, really, how big of a deal is this date?

A big freaking deal.

Because she’s in LOVE with Lexa. And that’s terrifying because they aren’t even together. It doesn’t make any sense to her. How can she be in love with Lexa when they’ve been friends with benefits and nothing more?

Okay, maybe that was a little harsh. Even though they are only friends right now, both women acknowledge that there is something more between them. So, calling them friends with benefits feels wrong, somehow. Almost like it’s demeaning to what their relationship really is.

Still, falling in love with your friend is a big deal. Like a HUGE deal. At least it is to Clarke. She has no fucking clue what to do about it.

Her only choice right now is to ignore it, keep it locked down tight. Because she has just recently been successful in getting Lexa to ask her out on a date. It took months of denial, a lot of tears and jealousy from both girls before Lexa had the courage to actually take the next step. So, if Clarke were to suddenly blurt out those three words to Lexa, she’s pretty sure that Lexa would freak the fuck out. Clarke would have her first and last date with Lexa. And she’s sure that Lexa would probably stop talking to her altogether. So, now is not the time for love declarations.

Now is the time for a fabulous first date and hopefully many more.

That doesn’t stop the swarm of butterflies from swirling in Clarke’s stomach, almost to the point of nausea. She wants, no, needs this date to go well.

A soft knock on the hotel door shakes Clarke from her thoughts, causing the butterflies to flutter even more.

Clarke takes a deep breath as she slowly gets to her feet. She grabs her shoes from the side of the hotel bed, slipping them on before she makes her way to the door. She stops in front of the mirror to check out her reflection.

The dress that she chose is a casual navy blue number. It stops just above her knees and hugs her curves perfectly. It’s strapless, of course, and it accentuates her already ample bosom. She put Lexa’s cog necklace on and opted to curl her hair. Clarke has never really been one to wear a lot of makeup, so tonight she went for eyeliner, smoky eyeshadow, and mascara. Topping it off with a clear lip gloss, she decided that that was enough. She finished off her outfit with a white cardigan in case it gets cold and a pair of heels.

She’s not one to toot her own horn, usually, but TOOT TOOT! She looks hella good tonight and she’s pretty sure that Lexa is going to lose her mind.

Taking one more breath, Clarke places her hand on the door. She’s still really, really nervous. But, she’s also insanely excited. She’s been waiting for this night for what feels like forever and if the butterflies would just fuck off for a second, she’d be all set.

She pulls the door open before she can lose her nerve, and the sight before her makes her instantly dizzy.

If she thought that she looked good, she was not ready for what Lexa was going to look like.

The object of her affections is standing in front of her, looking beyond sexy in a tight black dress. The left side of the dress has a slit in it that travels partially up Lexa’s toned thigh. Clarke’s mouth goes dry as she looks Lexa up and down.

Lexa looks fucking BREATHTAKING and Clarke can’t stop staring. It should actually be illegal to look as good as Lexa does right now.

Clarke tears her gaze away from Lexa’s slim figure, expecting to be chastised for her blatant ogling. Instead she finds Lexa doing exactly the same thing to her. Lexa’s nostrils flare slightly as she takes in Clarke’s outfit. Her eyes definitely linger on the girls for longer than appropriate. Clarke chuckles softly at Lexa’s brazen behavior, causing the brunette’s eyes to snap up and meet her gaze.

 _“Um, wow.”_ Really, Clarke? Eloquent much?

_“Clarke, you look stunning.”_

_“Um, yeah.”_ Okay, Griffin, seriously? Get your head out of your ass and use your words. You’re not a horny teenaged girl about to go on her first date.

 _“Are you okay?”_ Lexa bites her bottom lip, concern lacing her features.

 _“Yeah, I’m good. You just look…really gorgeous.”_ Good job Griffin! Back in the game.

_“Please, I look alright. You look amazing.”_

_“Thank you. I think that you look way better than I do.”_

_“Well then, we are going to have to agree to disagree. Because you look a million times better than I do. Also, these are for you.”_

Lexa holds out her hand, a bouquet of orange and yellow lilies pushed towards Clarke. Clarke takes the flowers from Lexa with a smile, inspecting the beautiful bouquet.

_“Thank you. These are beautiful. I don’t have a vase for them, though.”_

_“You’re welcome. It’s fine, really. We can put some water in the ice bucket and put them there.”_

_“Okay.”_

Lexa moves to walk into the room, intent on helping Clarke put the lilies in water. Clarke’s free hand grips her waist as she walks in, stopping her in place. Lexa turns her head towards Clarke in question, letting out a squeak when Clarke kisses her passionately. Clarke pulls back before Lexa can deepen the kiss, a bright smile on her face.

_“Sorry. I don’t normally kiss on the first date, but you are really sweet and you look beautiful. I couldn’t help myself.”_

_“You’re such a dork, Clarke.”_

_“I know.”_

_“I’m glad that you like the flowers, now let’s get them in some water so that we can go eat.”_

_“Okay. I promise to keep my hands to myself this time.”_

_“I never said that you had to do that.”_ Lexa replies cheekily, eyebrows raised suggestively.

_“If you want to leave this hotel room, I suggest that you stop looking so damn irresistible.”_

Lexa laughs lightly as she walks towards the sink, Clarke following closely behind her. She grabs the ice bucket and fills it halfway with cool water. She turns around to face Clarke so that she can take the flowers.

_“Do you know what kind of flowers these are?”_

_“Um, I’m not sure, but I think that they are Lilies?”_

_“That’s right.”_

_“They are gorgeous.”_

_“Do you know what yellow lilies symbolize?”_

_“No.”_

_“They mean gaiety. Being lighthearted or cheerful. Because you are cheerful and in good spirts most of the time. You are delightful to be around and bring joy to those around you.”_

_“Lexa. That’s beautiful.”_ Clarke kisses Lexa softly, a watery smile on her face. _“What do the orange ones mean?”_

 _“The orange lily symbolizes passion.”_ Clarke’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise. _“Not just in the sense that you’re thinking. I mean, yes, I meant passion as a lover. Because you definitely are. But it’s more than just that. You are passionate in everything that you do. You are a passionate artist and you have the ability to make others feel intensely from simply viewing your artwork. You are a wonderful friend, caring and fiercely loyal.”_

_“Okay, we have to leave now.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because if you say one more word to me right now, I am going to throw you on one of the beds and fuck you senseless.”_

_“I…”_

_“Nope, we gotta go. Now.”_

Clarke grabs Lexa’s hand, pulling her out of the room, abruptly, before they don’t leave.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Dinner turns out to be a way too expensive restaurant. At first it makes Clarke a little bit uncomfortable, but Lexa insists that she is going to pay, because she asked Clarke out. The food is amazing, of course.

After paying what is probably a ridiculously expensive check, Lexa takes Clarke’s hand and leads them both down the street. They leave the rental car in the parking lot because they are right near the piers. The night is still young and it is beautiful out. All of the beauty of the California coast pales in comparison to Clarke, Lexa thinks. No, she knows. They walk down the boardwalk, hand in hand, just enjoying each other’s presence. Clarke is the first to break the comfortable silence between them.

_“Thank you for dinner, Lexa.”_

_“You’re welcome. I hope that you enjoyed it.”_

_“I did. It was way too expensive, but it was really good.”_

_“I hope that the price of the meal didn’t make you uncomfortable, Clarke. I would never want to do that.”_

_“I know. I’m always weird about money. I’m sorry.”_

_“Don’t. I understand that money is a touchy subject for you, but never apologize for feeling the way that you do. It is not your fault. I just hope that taking you out to a nicer restaurant didn’t make you terribly uncomfortable.”_

_“It did at first. But I am trying to ignore it. I know that you have money, and that’s okay. The food was really good. The company was even better. So I don’t want you to feel bad for picking a nicer place.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Good. Now that we’ve gotten that stuff off our chests.”_

They come to a stop at a bench. Lexa stops their leisurely stroll so that they can sit for a moment. She turns her body slightly so that she can face Clarke, smiling slightly. She’s nervous to talk about her ‘conversation’ with Costia earlier, so the smile probably comes off as more of a grimace. Clarke doesn’t seem to notice, or if she does, she doesn’t say anything.

 _“So.”_ Lexa starts, clearing her throat as she musters up some strength.

_“Hmm?”_

_“I have some things to tell you. I’m just a little bit nervous.”_

Clarke’s easy smile falls, a slight frown taking over. She starts to panic internally, a little bit. Okay, a lot. But she tries to hide it.

_“Okay.”_

_“So, as you know, when we first met, you expressed a romantic interest in me.”_

_“Okay Lexa, this isn’t a job interview. You can drop the stuffy demeanor and clipped, fancy words. It’s just me.”_

_“Okay, sorry. So, you told me when we first met that you were attracted to me. Am I right?”_

_“Yes. Undoubtedly so.”_

_“Yeah. And you expressed a desire to get to know me in a more intimate setting. I shut you down, quite harshly. Offered you nothing but friendship, which you gratefully accepted. And you’ve been a wonderful friend. Even if we are, as our friends say, terrible at being friends.”_

_“It’s true. We aren’t good at being just friends.”_

_“You’re right. I knew that I was a lesbian at a very young age.”_

_“What does that have to do with anything?”_

_“Patience, Clarke. I’m getting there.”_

_“Sorry.”_

_“Now I knew that I was gay, but I had only found girls aesthetically pleasing. Even in my early teens, I was never sexually attracted to another person. I was pretty sure that I was asexual. That was, until I met Costia.”_

Of course, Clarke thinks, Costia. She tries to not be jealous, but she can’t help it. She’s still incredibly nervous, even though she thinks that the date went well. It was fantastic, if she’s being honest. She is afraid that Lexa doesn’t feel the same way.

_“Costia was such a free spirit, open and loving. The complete opposite of me, really. I was in awe of her, at first. I didn’t really understand how someone could be so cheerful and social. My only friend was Anya, and let’s face it, she’s not the most sociable person. Costia took to me immediately, which I found really surprising. Why would such an amazing girl willingly spend time with me? Alexandria Woods, the socially awkward lesbian who grew up without a dad. But for some crazy reason that I still don’t understand to this day, she did. We grew close quickly. It wasn’t long before I began to harbor some rather terrifying romantic feelings towards her. I was scared because this was something that I had never felt before. I couldn’t talk to Anya or my mom about it, and I didn’t have any other friends to confide in. So, I talked to Costia. And as if being my friend wasn’t surprising enough, she liked me too!”_

_“That’s awesome, Lex.”_

_“I know. I was so floored by her revelation that I ran away from her. I ran all the way home and immediately came out to Anya and then to my mom. It went surprisingly well and it wasn’t long before Costia and I started dating.”_

_“Okay.”_ Clarke doesn’t really know how to feel right now. This could be something good, or it could be the world’s longest, ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ speech.

_“We had such a whirlwind romance. I know that I told you about how I was sure that I was going to marry her. We were going to spend our lives together; I just knew it. So, when she died, I was devastated. I became a different person. I adopted the phrase ‘hodnes laik kwelnes’ or love is weakness. I told myself that I would never love again. I would never open myself up to such devastation, ever again. Even though I survived it once, I knew that I couldn’t survive another loss like that. And I did really well for a few years, until you stormed into my life.”_

_“Lex..”_

_“No, let me finish, please.”_ Lexa reaches a hand out so that she can tuck a strand of blonde hair behind Clarke’s ear. _“You came into my life like the most beautiful disaster. I don’t mean that you’re a disaster. I just mean that you never gave me a chance. I was so over being in love or dating and here comes this blonde barista, mouthy and devastatingly beautiful. She’s bold and infuriating. And I was not ready for you. So, I shut you down before you could even finish asking. I upset you a lot, unintentionally, might I add. But I was barely living. I offered you friendship, because that was all that I could do. I knew that if I let you in any further than that, you would absolutely destroy me. You were grateful and you accepted my cop out.”_

_“I just wanted you in whatever capacity I could have you.”_

_“I know. And I appreciate the valiant effort. But the world didn’t intend for us to be just friends. Ever since we became close, I stopped having nightmares. I was reliving Costia’s accident every single night as I slept. It all felt so real. Since I met you all those months ago, I’ve only had the nightmare once. And it was right at the beginning of our budding friendship.”_

_“I don’t know what to say.”_

_“You don’t have to say anything. I just wanted you to know what you do for me. You have helped me in ways that I will never be able to repay you for.”_

_“You don’t have to even try. You’ve done a lot for me too.”_

_“Costia was my first everything. She gave me so much. And then she took it all away from me. All because of a stupid fight. She went out and got drunk and died, because she didn’t want to marry me. For a long time I blamed myself. Something had to be seriously wrong with me if my girlfriend of almost six years didn’t want to marry me. Like, what kind of unlovable monster am I?”_

_“You’re not unlovable, Lex. You are amazing. And Costia loved you. She made a mistake while she was emotional and unfortunately, she died. But not because she didn’t love you. You said it yourself, she was a free spirit. And free spirits are hard to tie down. They spook easily. But that doesn’t make you unlovable.”_

_“I know that now. At the time I was pretty hard on myself about it. I was so destroyed when Cos died. I know that I’m not completely healed and I don’t know if I ever will be. My heart is hidden behind a concrete wall and I am still not convinced that I can let somebody else in. I have come to terms with Costia’s passing now, but there is still something…”_

Oh no, here it comes. Lexa is about to turn her down, again. Back into the friendzone, where she will spend the rest of her days hating herself. Unless she can change Lexa’s mind. Just don’t confess your undying love for her. Uh oh, nervous word vomit commencing.

_“Be my girlfriend?”_

Lexa’s eyes widen almost humorously at Clarke’s sudden outburst.

_“What?”_

_“Be my girlfriend?”_

_“Seriously?”_

_“Yes…I mean no. Because that was totally stupid and uncalled for. There is no way that you would want to be exclusive with me. We just went on our first date. And we had sex, yeah, but friends do that kind of stuff all the time. What kind of idiot….”_ Lexa clamps her hand over Clarke’s mouth, effectively shutting her up.

_“Clarke?”_

_“Hmm?”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“Oorrry.”_ Lexa drops her hand back into her lap, laughing at Clarke’s sad pout.

_“I can’t believe that you blurted that out.”_

_“I’m sorry. Can we please forget this whole conversation?”_

_“No.”_

_“No? Why not?”_

_“Don’t change the subject, Clarke. You interrupted me so that you could ask me to be your girlfriend.”_

_“Yeah, I know. You don’t have to remind me.”_

_“I’m not. What I am trying to get at, if you would stop rambling for just a second. Is that you completely stole my thunder.”_

_“What?”_

_“I know that I was taking a long time to get to it, but this conversation did have a point.”_

_“Yeah. You were going to turn me down. Easily, I hope. My heart can’t take much more rejection from you, Lexa Woods.”_

_“Clarke, would you stop being so dense?”_

_“Excuse me?”_

_“I wasn’t going to turn you down. I want you to be my girlfriend, you dork.”_

_“You what?”_

_“You heard me right. I know that I have taken way too long to catch up, but I am ready. Or at least, I think that I am. I want to call you mine.”_

_“Are you joshing me?”_

_“No, Clarke. I am completely serious. I think that life should be about more than just surviving. We have the chance to be something great.”_

_“Lexa Woods, you smooth talker, you.”_

Clarke surges forward, capturing Lexa’s lips with her own. She kisses her like her life depends on it, threading her fingers into brunette curls. She nibbles on Lexa’s bottom lip, eliciting a gasp from the brunette.

They part when oxygen becomes a necessity, smiling goofily at each other.

 _“So, is that a yes?”_ Lexa asks, green eyes hopeful and wide.

 _“Shut up and kiss me.”_ Clarke responds breathily before closing the distance between them once again.

 

 

**TBC**

**Well, there it was. I hope that it was worth the stupid long wait. Please let me know what you thought. Thanks for reading!**


	16. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya and Raven still have their heads in their asses.
> 
> Clarke and Lexa and Fish on their road trip.
> 
> Some super dominant/jealous Lexa.
> 
> Ice, ice, baby.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*~*~*~*~*
> 
> A/N: Alright my dears. I know that it has been a hot minute since I’ve updated and for that I am sorry. Real life sucks my will to live. I wish that I could just win the lottery so that I could stay home and write all day. Alas, my life is not and never will be that lucky. So, I will continue to be a slave, and I will update when I can.
> 
> On a side note, this month is the one year anniversary of Barista’s Choice!!! I’m super excited and I am going to try and do something special for the one year, on the 20th.
> 
> I hope that this chapter makes up for my super long absence. It’s over 16,000 words and super smutty. So, I hope that you guys enjoy it and thank you for being so patient with me.
> 
> Thank you for Randomme103 for being the thorn in my side to get this done, and for being my sounding board when I was stuck. She’s awesome, guys, and I wouldn’t have gotten this done without her help.
> 
> So, without further ado from my babbling ass, read on and enjoy!!!
> 
> ~*~*~*~*~*

**Barista’s Choice**

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Chapter 15**

**~*~*~*~*~***

 

**~Anya’s POV~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Living in California is a stark contrast to growing up in Oregon. The summers in Oregon are mild and often cloudy while California is humid and full of sunshine.

Lexa and Anya spent a lot of time outside growing up. The mild Oregon summers were nice enough that the two girls spent most of their time doing whatever they could outside. Hiking quickly became their favorite activity. Their mothers often had to come find them and drag them back home long after the sun went down for the day.

Being outside during the summer in California was not something that Anya particularly enjoyed. The humidity often made her feel like she was constantly sweating. Not to mention the frizzy state of hell that her hair was currently stuck in.

Her nerves have been shot for the past couple hours. She should’ve ignored the phone call, she really should have just let it go to voicemail. But she missed her girlfriend so much, she just wanted to hear Raven’s voice. She didn’t know that Raven was going to immediately chicken out and hang up after she said hello.

God, she just wanted to end this stupid fight.

She really didn’t want to go home still at odds with Raven. It just didn’t feel right. She knew that she wasn’t completely innocent in this argument. Yeah, she didn’t walk away like Raven did, but she pushed. She was definitely a pushy person when it came to getting what she wanted and it led to many arguments growing up. She and Lexa had fought many times over the years because of Anya’s persistence, especially after Lexa lost Costia. Raven and Lexa were very similar in their ability to shut down emotionally to avoid bringing up painful memories. And it infuriated Anya to no end.

This time, she went too far. She pushed Raven and when she knew that the brunette was at her breaking point, she pushed some more. She knew that Raven was reluctant when it came to talking about her childhood, but she couldn’t help that she was curious.

Raven was a master of jovial distraction, but Anya could see the sadness set deep into the brown eyes that she loved so much. She knew that something big had happened in Raven’s past and she wanted nothing more than to know what was plaguing her girlfriend.

That was the bad part about being so pushy. Sometimes, Anya didn’t know when to stop. When she got into the heat of the moment, she would go until things came to a breaking point.

When Raven called her last night, she was sure that they were going to end their fight.

Raven didn’t last on the phone after Anya said hi. She stammered out Anya’s name a few times before hanging up the phone. Anya tried to call her back, but each time Raven let the call go to voicemail.

Anya’s mind was running wild. She knew that she had to go back home before she lost it entirely. Not having Lexa around wasn’t helping matters any. She knew that her best friend needed time to work on her budding relationship with Clarke, but she was really missing her right about now.

She even went so far as to hang out with one of her classmates from her Intro to Abnormal Psychology class.

Hanging out with Emori was nice. It was a relief to be able to ignore the aching pain in her heart for even a short amount of time. She had been partnered up with Emori for a couple of group projects in their class. Anya hit it off with her immediately.

Last night Emori asked Anya if she wanted to go out for a drink after class. Anya was pretty reluctant to do anything but mope around the apartment, but in the end, she agreed to go out.

It turned out to be a double-edged sword. She needed to get out of her own head for a little bit and going out for a drink was bound to help. The problem with drinking is that is Anya’s already faulty verbal filter became pretty much nonexistent when she started to loosen up with alcohol.

She’s three shots of tequila and two beers in when her verbal filter completely stops functioning. She’s usually got a higher tolerance for alcohol, but she hasn’t eaten today and she slammed the shots back in less than ten minutes. Her head is fuzzy in the best way because she able to feel more than just the debilitating heartbreak that has been plaguing her since her fight with Raven. The pain in her heart is quickly being replaced with anger.

 _“It’s just bullshit, you know?”_ She growls out, words slightly muffled around the neck of her beer bottle.

 _“What is?”_ Emori questions, eyebrows raised in question at Anya’s sudden outburst.

_“What she did.”_

_“I’m sorry, but I’m not sure what you’re talking about Anya.”_

_“She just leaves. Doesn’t put up a fight. Turns her back on me and leaves.”_

Emori leans over the table, placing her hand on Anya’s arm. She searches Anya’s eyes questioningly. She doesn’t know Anya very well personally, so she’s not exactly sure what the other girl is talking about. Anya’s always been pretty private about her personal life, opting to only talk about necessities when they’ve worked on their group projects.

_“Anya, I’m not trying to sound inconsiderate here, but what the hell are you talking about?”_

_“Raven. She just walks out while we’re in the middle of an argument. Who even does that?”_

_“Who is Raven?”_

Anya looks up at Emori, tearing her attention away from the ring of condensation that her beer bottle left on the table. The confused furrow of Emori’s brow almost makes Anya laugh. Almost. Until she remembers that she doesn’t really know Emori and the poor girl probably has no idea what she’s talking about. She really, really misses Lexa.

_“Shit, I’m sorry. It’s nothing.”_

_“Obviously, it’s something. Look, if you need somebody to talk to, I’m a pretty good listener.”_

_“I’m sure that you didn’t invite me out so that I could complain about my relationship woes.”_

_“I asked you out for a drink because you looked like you needed one. That’s all.”_

_“Well, I am appreciative of that. And you were most definitely right.”_

_“So, tell me about your woes.”_

_“I’m going to need like four more shots before I’m ready to talk about them.”_

_“Fair enough. I’ll be right back.”_

~*~*~*~*~*

~Raven’s POV~

~*~*~*~*~*

Growing up, Raven was obsessed with figuring out how things worked. She loved to take things apart so that she could see their inner workings.

Her obsession often led to her getting in trouble with her foster parents for tinkering with their electronics. She couldn’t help it, she had an almost compulsive need to meddle with whatever she could get her hands on.

That obsession didn’t fade as she got older, if anything it only worsened.

She needed to keep herself busy, because she was quickly losing her mind.

At least that was what she was telling herself, because she was still reeling over the fact that she called Anya last night. She wouldn’t really call it a phone call, because she only managed to say hello and stutter out Anya’s name four or five times before freaking out and hanging up her phone.

The sound of Anya’s voice over the phone made Raven lose her nerve. She thought that she was ready to talk to her girlfriend, but apparently her brain was rendered useless when Anya’s broken voice crackled over her speaker.

She needed to figure her shit out before she did irreparable damage and lost Anya for good, but she was so scared.

Instead of running this time, she was determined to figure out a way to get over her fear so that she could talk to Anya.

So, she found herself in her engineering professor’s lab, working with bits of scrap metal early in the morning. She couldn’t sleep after her failed reconciliation attempt. Professor Pike was kind of an asshole, but he gave Raven full access to his lab, even during school breaks.

At first, she was just playing around with the metal, no real plan in mind. Soldering pieces of metal together was oddly calming for her.

Halfway through her morning she decided to build something.

She spent the rest of her afternoon building a tiny robot. She knew that if Clarke or O were here, they would give her so much shit about this, but she didn’t know what else to do.

The robot wasn’t very pretty, but it was practical and it would serve its purpose.

Raven named the tiny robot Raven Junior and brought it home with her late that afternoon. It was complete with an automated voice box that would cry in four to six hour intervals.

She wasn’t sure if this would help her get over her fear of having a child, but she HAD to try. At this point, she would do pretty much anything to get Anya back.

She was sitting on her unmade bed with Raven Junior when it happened.

Her phone had been silent for the last twenty-four hours, since her failed phone call to Anya. Her girlfriend tried to call her back a few times after she hung up, but she didn’t have the courage to pick up.

She was expecting a phone call from Clarke that day, her best friend promised her a play by play of her first date with Lexa. So, Raven didn’t even think twice before picking up her ringing phone, not even bothering to look at the caller id.

_“It’s about time you called me, Princess. I was worried that you were stuck in some sort of post coital bliss with the Commander.”_

_“Raven.”_

The sound of Anya’s voice makes Raven’s heart stutter in her chest. She sucks in a deep breath, willing her mouth to make words come out.

_“Um, hey.”_

_“Hey. Are you busy?”_ Anya’s voice sounds unsure and it makes Raven’s eyes well up with tears. She’s the reason why Anya sounds so broken.

_“No, not really. I’m just at home.”_

_“Okay. Do you have any plans tonight?”_

_“Nope. I was just going to hang out in my room, maybe eat something and go to bed.”_

_“Can you meet me at Grounder’s in like thirty?”_

_“Sure.”_

_“Okay. See you in a bit.”_

Anya hangs up the phone before Raven can utter a reply. Raven drops her phone onto her bed with a sigh.

How is she going to face Anya right now? She’s an absolute mess. She hasn’t slept for more than two hours since this whole fiasco and she’s pretty sure that she’s still wearing the same clothes. As much as she is dreading facing her girlfriend right now, she knows that she owes Anya something. Anything really at this point.

First things first, a shower and a fresh pair of clothes are in order.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Walking into Grounder’s makes Raven feel weird. The vibe feels different when her two best friends aren’t running the show. Harper and Indra are behind the counter, working through the after-dinner rush. The two women work like a well-oiled machine, pumping out drinks almost as fast as they are being ordered.

Raven enters the café quietly, trying not to draw any attention to herself. She pulls the hood of her jacket up, dropping her head to stare at the ground. Her limp is more pronounced today, mostly due to her fatigue.

Anya is seated at a table in the back, her posture slumped over a steaming cup of coffee. Her attention is on her phone, fingers typing furiously against the touchscreen. She’s either texting or playing tap titans. Raven approaches the table and takes the empty seat across from her girlfriend.

Anya doesn’t immediately look up at her, but Raven takes the time to look the other woman over. Anya looks just as worn down as she feels. There are dark circles under the blonde’s eyes. She has her glasses on, the thin rimmed frames resting on her nose. Her dirty blonde hair is still wet from the shower, tied in a messy bun on top of her head. Raven thinks that she looks tired and sad, but still so beautiful.

 _“Hey.”_ Raven attempts to break the awkward silence. Her voice is scratchy with emotion, tired and quiet.

 _“Hey.”_ Anya replies without looking up from her phone.

Raven wants to start her long thought out apology, but she knows that she needs to wait for Anya to talk. She owes her girlfriend that much.

So, she sits there in silence, waiting as patiently as she possibly can. After a few more rapid taps against the screen, Anya finally looks up from her phone.

Raven wants to smile, because she is so happy to see Anya again, but she doesn’t. Anya doesn’t smile either, opting for quiet indifference. Raven pulls her hood down, rubbing tiredly at her eyes.

_“Thank you for meeting me.”_

_“No problem.”_

_“So, how are you?”_

_“I’ve been better. You?”_

_“Same.”_

_“Anya…I’m sorry.”_

_“Don’t.”_ Anya holds a hand up to silence her girlfriend. _“Don’t. Let me talk first.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“First, I need to apologize to you.”_

_“What?”_

_“I was pretty out of line during our argument. I called you a coward and I pushed you when I should’ve just let it slide.”_

_“It’s fine.”_

_“No, it’s not. I can be sort of pushy when I get mad. It’s caused Lexa and I to fight often over the years.”_

_“Seriously, Ahn, it’s fine.”_

_“Okay. Now that we gotten the apology out of the way, I have something that I need to get off of my chest.”_

_“Go ahead.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Why what?”_

_“Why won’t you open up to me?”_

_“I am open with you.”_

_“No, you’re not. At least not completely.”_

_“It’s,”_ Raven runs her fingers through her hair, _“it’s not that simple.”_

_“Look Raven, I love you, I really do. But if you can’t be honest with me, then there is no way that this is going to work.”_

_“I’ve never lied to you.”_

Raven’s voice starts to get a bit louder as her anger rises. The only thing stopping her from yelling is the fact that they are in a very public place. She really doesn’t want to make a scene, but if Anya pushes her, she doesn’t know if she’ll be able to keep her cool.

_“I did not accuse you of lying. I am merely stating the fact that conversation is obviously something that we are lacking in our relationship. Conversation is an extremely important aspect that we can’t ignore.”_

_“Oh my god, save it. You sound like Lexa.”_

_“I want you to be able to tell me things, Raven. Is that too much to ask of you?”_

_“I told you that I don’t want to talk about it. Why can’t you just respect my wishes?”_

_“Because I’m just trying to understand why you are so closed off about your childhood. I want to know everything about you, Raven.”_

_“I DON’T LIKE TO TALK ABOUT IT, ANYA.”_

_“Girls, can you keep it down? Maybe to a dull roar? You are in a public place, after all.”_

Both women look up as Indra’s authoritative voice breaks them out of their bubble. The older woman is standing at the end of the table, hands resting on her hips. She looks very much like a mom right now and it makes Anya shrink back in her seat.

Raven on the other hand, has never really been good with authority. She sits up straight in her seat, refusing to let the older woman get to her.

 _“Sorry, Indra.”_ Anya meekly replies as she drops her gaze to the table.

_“Yeah, yeah. Just keep it down, please.”_

As soon as Indra walks away, Raven turns her attention back towards Anya. She’s angry again, and it’s getting harder for her not to lash out.

_“Why are you being so pushy again?”_

_“I just want to understand, that’s all.”_

_“I’m not some patient for you to psychoanalyze. I’m supposed to be your fucking girlfriend.”_

_“I never said anything about wanting to psychoanalyze you. Why are you twisting my intentions? It’s like you’re trying to fight with me.”_

_“Well, it sure fucking seems like it.”_

_“I assure that I’m not. You can’t fault me for wanting to know about your past.”_

_“Sure I can.”_

Anya lets out an exasperated sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose in annoyance.

_“Does Lexa know?”_

_“Yeah, but it’s not the same.”_

_“What?!”_

_“It’s not the same.”_

_“How is it not the same?”_

_“Because she didn’t fucking question me relentlessly.”_

_“Okay, I’ve warned you both about the volume of your voices. Get up and come with me.”_

Anya stands up immediately at Indra’s stern voice. Raven just huffs in annoyance, crossing her arms over her chest in defiance.

_“I’m good here.”_

_“Rae, I wouldn’t argue with Indra.”_

_“I’m not arguing. I simply said that I’m good here.”_

Indra narrows her eyes at Raven’s attitude. She leans over the table, bringing her face close to Raven’s.

_“Raven Reyes, are you always so difficult?”_

_“How do you know my full name?”_

_“I know a lot of things about you, child. Now get up.”_

_“I’m not a child and no thanks.”_

_“I’m not convinced. You’re acting extremely childish right now.”_

_“Hey, fuc…OUCH!!!”_ Raven’s statement breaks off as Indra flicks her in the forehead with her thumb and forefinger. _“What the fuck?!”_

_“Do not sass me. Get your ass up, girl.”_

_“Fine. Jesus fucking Christ.”_

_“Watch your mouth. There are children in here.”_

_“Well, maybe you shouldn’t thump people if you don’t want them to curse.”_

_“I wouldn’t have to ‘thump’ people if they would show some decorum in public.”_

_“Still kind of a dick move dude.”_

_“Em pleni Reivon. Taim nab ants. NAU!!!”_

_“Listen to Anya, Raven. Unless you want another thump.”_

_“Alright, alright. I’m getting up.”_

Raven gets to her feet with a grunt. Sitting down has only made her leg hurt even more. She limps behind Anya and Indra, cursing under her breath. It takes Raven a minute to realize that Indra was definitely not speaking English to her. Trigedasleng….but how?

_“Wait a second here. Indra, you speak trigedasleng?”_

_“Sha, Reivon kom Skaikru. Mafta ai op. Nau, gada.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Indra leads the two women to the backroom of the café. Raven has been back here many times before when Clarke and O have been on shift. Not that she’s going to tell Indra that. Especially now that she knows how violent the other woman is. She sits down on the couch, even though she’s pretty sure that Clarke has had sex multiple times on it. That thought alone makes her kind of want to die a little bit.

Anya sits down on the opposite side of the couch, resting her body against the arm so that she’s facing Raven.

_“The two of you are going to sit in here and figure out how to talk to each other properly. I expect that you come to an agreement about your relationship before you leave.”_

_“Yes, Indra.”_

_“Yeah, sure. Whatever.”_

_“Onya. Tel ai op niron to hod op bilaik goufa.”_

_“Indra…”_

_“Chit?”_

_“Be nice.”_

_“Em laik goufa.”_

_“Okay, seriously. We will talk, but you have to leave us alone.”_

_“Fine.”_

_“Mochof.”_

_“Pro.”_

Indra spins on her heels and leaves the room without another word, leaving the two women alone.

The tension is thick, deafening silence filling the room. Raven wrings her hands nervously together, waiting for Anya to speak first. She’s still pretty mad, and she knows that she probably say something that she’ll regret.

_“So…”_

_“So?”_

_“Why are you okay with telling Lexa, but you can’t tell me?”_

_“Because…”_

_“Because why?”_ Anya raises an eyebrow in Raven’s direction, crossing her arms protectively across her chest.

_“I told you. It’s different.”_

_“Okay. If you want to keep doing this bullshit, I’m just going to leave. Indra is right about you acting like a child.”_

Anya moves to stand up so that she can leave. Raven feels a surge of panic at the thought of her girlfriend leaving. She knows that she’s running out of chances with Anya and she doesn’t want to lose her. She surges forward so that she can grab Anya’s wrist, pulling the other girl back onto the couch.

_“Wait.”_

_“This better be good.”_

_“Just, give me a second. Please.”_

Raven keeps her grip on Anya’s wrist, rubbing her thumb softly across her girlfriend’s skin.

_“Okay. So, I really, really hate talking about my life. And I’m sorry that I get really defensive about it. I don’t mean to be such an asshole. It just sucks, okay?”_

_“I understand that. I just want you to be able to talk to me. It makes me feel like you don’t trust me.”_

_“That’s not it.”_

_“Then why were you okay with Lexa knowing about your childhood, but as soon as I ask, you jump down my throat?”_

_“Because Lexa gets it, okay?”_

_“She gets what?”_

_“She knows what it’s like to grow up in a shitty situation. She doesn’t have her dad. I didn’t have my dad. Hell, I barely had a mom. So, I’m sorry that you wouldn’t understand, seeing as you have two loving parents.”_

_“Are you kidding me? I wouldn’t understand?”_

_“No. You had a good childhood, I didn’t. You probably grew up in a nice house. I squatted in different abandoned buildings with my mom while she looked for her next hit of whatever drug she could find. And when I finally got taken into foster care, I was put into a lot of shitty situations until I found my forever family. I treated them like shit because I was a dispassionate little shit and they loved me anyway. When I was eighteen, I went out to a party with my foster brother, Atom. He got drunk and I only had one drink. On the way home, we were hit by a drunk driver. A piece of the driver’s side door sliced through my spine and the steering column shattered my left leg. They told my foster parents that I was never going to walk again.”_

_“Raven, I’m so sorr…”_

_“Save it. The having a fucked-up leg isn’t even the worst of it. The shittiest thing of that whole accident is that while I was at risk of being partially paralyzed for the rest of my life, at least I had the rest of my life to live. I am the reason why my foster brother never got to graduate high school. Why he will never get to fall in love and get married. He will never have kids of his own and grow old with his wife, or husband. Because of me, Atom died in that car accident. I killed my foster brother. As if I wasn’t fucked-up enough. Let’s add murderer to the list.”_

Raven feels the hot tears rolling down her cheeks. She hates crying in front of Anya, it makes her feel weak. She doesn’t feel any better now that she’s told her girlfriend either. She feels raw and exposed and she just wants to crawl into her bed and sleep the rest of this day away. She wants to, no, needs to leave. Right now. She can’t get up and leave because Anya is gripping her wrist tightly.

_“Don’t. Don’t walk away from me again.”_

Raven tears her gaze away from their hands to meet her girlfriend’s eyes. Tears are freely falling down Anya’s cheeks.

_“I need to go.”_

_“No, you don’t. We aren’t done talking.”_

_“I’m done.”_

_“So, that’s it? You’re just done talking to me?”_

_“Yes. You should be happy. You got exactly what you wanted. Now you know why I am such a fucked-up mess.”_

_“That wasn’t the point of me asking you, Raven.”_

_“Wasn’t it though?”_

_“No. I just thought that it would be good for you to talk about it. It’s not healthy to hold all of those negative feelings inside.”_

_“Seriously?”_ Raven laughs sardonically, pulling her wrist out of Anya’s grasp.

_“Yes.”_

_“Well it didn’t make me feel any fucking better, okay? All I want to do is go home and drink myself into a stupor. I just….I need to go.”_

_“Please don’t leave.”_

_“I can’t stay. I can’t be around you right now.”_

_“You won’t have to worry about that for very long.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“I’m leaving, Raven.”_

_“What?”_

_“Oh don’t pretend that you don’t know. I know that Clarke told you. I’m going home for a while. I need to get out of town.”_

_“No.”_

_“Yes, I do. I need to leave.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Can’t you see? I have to go because this stupid fight is tearing us apart. I don’t have Lexa here to distract me right now so I’m suffering. I have nobody here and I can’t…I just can’t stay while we’re fighting.”_

_“I don’t want you to leave.”_

_“I’m sorry. I have to go because, right now, you aren’t ready to be together.”_

_“What?! What do you mean?”_

_“I know that I was super pushy and rude during our fight, but I apologized for it. You haven’t apologized for walking out on me.”_

_“W…”_

_“If you say that you don’t have to apologize for walking out, I’m going to absolutely lose my mind. You hurt me, Raven.”_

_“That’s not what I was going to say.”_

The look of hurt on Anya’s face makes Raven want to cry even more than she already is. She wants to wrap Anya up in her arms and apologize so that she never has to see that look again.

_“You still don’t feel like you did anything wrong, do you Raven?”_

_“I don’t know.”_

_“Of course not.”_ Anya laughs sarcastically, shaking her head in disbelief. _“I can’t believe that I even had you meet me out here. I thought that we might be able to end this stupid fight before I left, but apparently I was mistaken.”_

_“Anya, I love you.”_

_“Do you?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“So why is this so difficult for you?”_

_“Because, I don’t feel like I need to apologize for anything.”_

_“Seriously?”_

_“I mean, I walked out, yeah. But I had to before I said something that I couldn’t take back. You kept pushing me and I needed to leave. I told you that I don’t like talking about my childhood and you just wouldn’t listen.”_

_“Okay. I’m going to end this conversation before I say something that I’ll regret later. Look, I think that we need to take a break.”_

_“You what?”_

_“We need to take a break.”_

_“Ahn, no.”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because, you still think that you didn’t do anything wrong. So, I’m going to go home for like a month, clear my head. You stay here and figure out what you want. I know that the idea of kids freaks you out and I understand that, I do. But I wasn’t asking you to bear my children. I was just bringing up the idea that maybe it could be an option one day. I know that we haven’t been together for very long, but I really do love you. And the idea of sharing the rest of my life with you makes me so incredibly happy. But, it seems like we aren’t in the same place right now. So, taking a break will be good for us. As soon as I get back, we’ll come back to this conversation and try to work things out.”_

_“No, Ahn, don’t. That’s not a good idea. I don’t you to break up with me.”_

_“Taking a break doesn’t always mean breaking up.”_

_“Don’t pull that crap. Everybody knows that ‘taking a break’ is the nice way of breaking up with somebody.”_

_“I am not breaking up with you Raven. I’m not talking about taking a break so that I can go home and screw whoever I want. I’m just talking about taking a break from all of this heavy shit that is hovering over us. I love you so much Raven and I want to work things out with you. I just need some space, and you need some time to figure out what you want.”_

Raven’s vision blurs as her eyes fill with tears. She doesn’t bother wiping them away. She wants, no, deserves to feel this pain. Deep down she knows that she is in the wrong. Even though Anya pushed her to her breaking point, she shouldn’t have walked out during their fight. She should’ve stayed and pushed back. They probably would’ve argued and there would more than likely be a lot of tears. But they wouldn’t be stuck at an impasse like they are now. Anya wouldn’t be leaving her to go home. And she most definitely wouldn’t be suggesting that they take a break. What kind of nonsensical bullshit is that?

Raven doesn’t want to take a break. She loves Anya. More so than she ever thought possible. So, for the life of her, she can’t understand why she can’t just girl up and apologize to Anya. Especially if it means losing her.

She feels the words at the tip of her tongue, practically begging her to say them. Something keeps holding her back. And it’s really starting to piss her off. She opens her mouth to just spit out the apology that her girlfriend (ex-girlfriend?) deserves, but all that comes out is a pathetic whimper. She sucks in a breath as Anya’s lips press softly against her forehead.

She’s so lost in her own self-depreciating thoughts that she doesn’t realize that Anya has left the room, leaving her by herself.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**~Anya’s POV~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

She’s pretty damn proud of herself for holding her composure for as long as she has. The tears don’t really start until she is half a block away from the café.

Leaving Raven in the backroom was the hardest decision that she has ever had to make. Anya wanted nothing more than to scoop her girlfriend up in a hug and just forget all of this crap. At the end of the day, what point was she trying to make?

Okay, so maybe she wasn’t trying to make a point. She was trying to protect her heart.

Roan was her first love but she knew that Raven was her forever. She wanted to lose herself in Raven, now and always. But she still had to be smart about it. She couldn’t just throw her heart out there, just for it to be stomped on.

No.

Anya couldn’t take having her heart crushed by Raven.

Sure, she hadn’t been through the devastating loss that her best friend had been through, but she was there when it happened. She watched as Lexa broke down and became a person that neither one of them recognized. She had to sit by and watch her best friend lost a piece of herself.

Honestly, Anya wasn’t sure how Lexa survived losing Costia. She may have closed off her heart behind a reinforced brick wall, but she still survived. Anya’s pretty sure that she would’ve just curled up into a ball and died.

Maybe that’s a bit dramatic, but her emotions are kind of out of whack right now.

She can’t think about all of this right now. She needs to get out of town.

She was going to wait until tomorrow to leave, but after making zero headway with Raven, she’s ready to go now. It’s a good thing that she hasn’t been able to sleep for the past five days, so she’s been packed for her trip since yesterday.

So now she’s going to go home, tie up a few loose ends so that she can get the fuck out of dodge.

Her phone chimes in her pocket as she waits for the crosswalk to allow her to cross. She pulls the device out of her jeans, hoping that Raven is not trying to talk her out of leaving. She lets out a huge sigh of relief when she sees Lexa’s name flash across the screen.

**_Heda: Shopta, Onya?_ **

**_Onya: Ai laik ku._ **

**_Heda: Yu get kiln?_ **

**_Onya: Sha, Leksa._ **

**_Heda: Kei. Chit laik yu op tu?_ **

**_Onya: Eintheing._ **

**_Heda: Yu laik spichen?_ **

**_Onya: Nowe._ **

**_Heda: Yu don gyon au hou?_ **

**_Onya: Not yet. I still have some stuff to take care of before I leave. Later today though._ **

**_Heda: Have you talked to Raven yet?_ **

**_Onya: Yeah._ **

**_Heda: How did it go?_ **

**_Onya: It went about the same as last time. Indra had to step in because we got too loud in the café._ **

**_Heda: I bet that went well._ **

**_Onya: She took us to the back after thumping Raven in the forehead and told us that we had to talk our issues out before we left._ **

**_Heda: Oh, that is awesome. But you guys weren’t able to communicate? Still?_ **

**_Onya: Well, we talked a bit. She told me about her mom and foster care. And then she told me about her car accident._ **

**_Heda: That’s progress, isn’t it?_ **

**_Onya: I mean, I guess. Not much, but it’s better than nothing. I told her that we needed to take a break._ **

**_Heda: How’d that go?_ **

**_Onya: Not well. But I feel like it’s something that needed to be done. I love her but she hurt me, really badly._ **

**_Heda: I know. I’m sorry, Anya. Maybe you going home will be the kick in the ass that she needs to grow up._ **

**_Onya: Maybe. I hope so. Enough about my shitty love life. How are things with your GIRLFRIEND?_ **

**_Heda: Things are AMAZING. She’s getting dressed so that we can go down to get breakfast. After that we are going to head to the beach._ **

**_Onya: Sounds awesome. I’m super jealous. When are you guys heading to San Diego?_ **

**_Heda: The day after tomorrow. We are in Anaheim now and I’m taking her to Disneyland tomorrow._ **

**_Onya: Way to woo the girl Lex. It certainly took you long enough._ **

**_Heda: Shut up._ **

**_Onya: I’m not giving you shit, Lex. I mean it. I’m really glad that you decided to give Clarke a chance. You guys are really good for each other._ **

**_Heda: I know. She’s amazing._ **

**_Onya: I am glad that you found somebody. You deserve it, you know. Even if you don’t think so. Cos would’ve wanted you to be happy._ **

**_Heda: I know. I talked to her a bit before my date with Clarke._ **

**_Onya: Like you used to after her accident?_ **

**_Heda: Yeah. I told her that I met somebody and that I needed to let her go. It helped a lot._ **

**_Onya: I’m glad. Alright, go get breakfast with your girl. I’m going to pack up my car and get ready to leave. I’ll skype you later._ **

**_Heda: Sounds like a plan. Please drive safely. If you need to stop for the night, you’d better. I know that you haven’t been sleeping very well lately._ **

**_Onya: I’ll be fine, Lex._ **

**_Heda: It’s an eleven hour drive, Anya. Don’t be a stubborn asshole._ **

**_Onya: Okay. I promise. Now go hang out with your girlfriend._ **

**_Heda: I’ll talk to you later. Text me when you stop for the night._ **

**_Onya: Sha, Heda._ **

Anya slips the phone back into her pocket. She looks up at the street, checking both ways for traffic before she walks across the crosswalk.

The walk back to her apartment is quiet as she lets her conversation replay in her head. She didn’t expect the conversation to go the way that it did. If she’s being honest with herself, she figured that they would come to some sort of reconciliation. She was hurt, but all she wanted was an apology from Raven. Just a simple, ‘I’m sorry,’ for walking away and this whole fight would’ve been behind them.

In a perfect world, she and Raven would be going on this trip together. The idea of introducing the woman that she was in love with to her family was an exciting prospect for Anya. She wanted nothing more than to have her parents and friends meet the woman that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.

Unfortunately, she didn’t live in a perfect world. So, Raven wasn’t going on a road trip with her. No, she was going home alone. She and Raven were at a very uncomfortable impasse and she wasn’t sure if they were going to get over this hump. She had such hope that they would eventually figure everything out, but god did she miss Raven. Seeing her girlfriend this morning was hard to say the least.

Raven looked tired and defeated. Seeing the sadness in the brown eyes that she loved almost broke Anya. She could tell that Raven hadn’t been sleeping well, much like she hadn’t been. Raven’s gait showed her fatigue, her limp more pronounced as she made her way over to the table.

She pushed her girlfriend again, desperate to get answers from Raven. And she got her wish as Raven exploded in rage and blurted out facts about her childhood. Listening to Raven talk about growing up the way she did broke Anya’s heart. She expected to feel better about Raven opening up to her, but she wasn’t. She was angry at herself for being so pushy. Even though Raven walked away the first time, Anya knew that she was responsible for it. She should’ve been more understanding and just let the issue drop for the time being. But she couldn’t and look where it led them.

Fuck.

Why did she have to be so damn hard headed? Not only that, she had to go and fall in love with another stubborn person. They were bound to bump heads from time to time.

She just had to hope that this wasn’t the fight to break them.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**~Lexa’s POV~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa was going to die, of that much she was sure. Her heart was going to give out on her at any minute, and she couldn’t care less about it.

Because Clarke Griffin in a bikini was absolutely worth her impending heart attack.

The sky blue bikini that the blonde was clad in left little to Lexa’s imagination. Not that she hadn’t seen the blonde’s body without a stitch of clothing on before, but this was different.

The bikini hugged Clarke’s curves perfectly. It was making all of the moisture in Lexa’s mouth travel to a much more southern place in her body. She wanted nothing more than to pounce on top of Clarke and ravish her body. The only thing stopping her from giving into her primal feelings was the fact that they were in a very public place.

That didn’t help her curb her desire, though.

Clarke knew it too, the little vixen.

She was definitely pushing Lexa’s buttons.

It all started with innocent touches while they were eating breakfast. Clarke made sure to have constant contact with Lexa the entire time. By the time they made it to the beach, Lexa was a wanton mess.

 _“Lex?”_ Clarke’s soft voice breaks Lexa out of her inner turmoil. She opens her eyes to look at Clarke, who is standing above her. She’ll never admit it, but she takes her time as her eyes rake up the tantalizing expanse of Clarke’s body. Fish looks up from his spot on Lexa’s towel at the sound of Clarke’s voice. His tired puppy eyes look at both of his moms, apparently not finding anything to spark his interest because he huffs softly before closing his eyes.

_“Hmm?”_

_“Would you mind putting some more sunscreen on my back?”_

_“I…um…yeah.”_ Lexa has to force herself to stop ogling her girlfriend. Even though she is totally allowed to do that. She stills feels a little weird about perving on her. She pulls her body into a sitting position, groaning as her stiff muscles protest the movement.

_“Wow, cat got your tongue, Lexie?”_

_“Sorry. You just look really hot.”_

_“Well, it is pretty warm out here.”_

_“That’s totally not what I meant.”_

_“I know. I just like watching you get flustered.”_

Clarke nudges Lexa’s knees apart so that she can settle down in-between her girlfriend’s legs. Lexa’s arms immediately wrap around Clarke’s waist, pulling their bodies flush together. She nuzzles her face into Clarke’s neck, savoring the warmth of the blonde’s sun kissed skin. She can taste the salt from the ocean breeze on Clarke’s skin as she presses her lips against the fluttering pulse.

_“Mmm, you don’t play fair, Lexie.”_

_“Says the girl that has been touching me all day.”_

_“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”_

_“Liar. You know exactly what you do to me, you minx.”_

_“Like you don’t to the same thing to me.”_

Clarke’s response is breathless as Lexa bites down on her earlobe.

_“You’re just lucky that we’re in a public place.”_

_“Is that so?”_

_“Umhmm. Because if we were back in the hotel, you would not be dressed.”_

_“Oh yeah?”_

_“Nope. Not a stitch of clothing would be on you.”_

_“And why would I be naked?”_

_“Because you would be writhing underneath me as I make you come. The only words coming out of your mouth would be my name followed by a few choice expletives.”_

_“Jesus Lex, you can’t just say stuff like that to me.”_

_“Why not? Does it turn you on?”_

_“What do you think?”_

_“I don’t know. Maybe I should check.”_ Lexa slides her hands down Clarke’s hips, her fingers dipping underneath Clarke’s bikini bottoms. Clarke lets out a gasp, halting Lexa’s movements by grabbing her wrists.

_“Lex. We are in a public place.”_

_“So?”_

_“So. Do you really want to go to jail for indecent exposure?”_

_“No.”_ Clarke can feel Lexa’s lips pouting against her neck and it makes her laugh heartily. _“We can go back to the hotel.”_

_“No way Jose. We are going to hang out on the beach so that I can spend the day tanning and ogling your bikini clad body.”_

_“But if we went back to the hotel, you could do whatever you want to my naked body.”_ Lexa ends her statement with a sharp nip to Clarke’s neck, eliciting a gasp out of the other woman.

_“Lex…this is not a fair game that you’re playing.”_

_“I never said that I played fair.”_

_“I just wanted you to put sunscreen on my back.”_

_“Hmmm, well, I wanted cuddles.”_

_“Naughty cuddles.”_

_“Well, can you blame me? You look amazing in this bikini. And I know for a fact that you look even better out of it.”_

Lexa’s lips ghost over the expanse of Clarke’s neck as she breathily whispers to her. The sensation of Lexa’s warm breath against Clarke’s skin makes her body break out in goosebumps. She’s quickly losing her composure, and she knows that she won’t last much longer. She feels Lexa’s hands pull away from her hips, one hand reaching for something behind them. She doesn’t turn to look however, too distracted by the soothing warmth of Lexa’s body against hers.

The next press of Lexa’s lips against her neck makes her scream, because Lexa’s lips are freezing cold. She would be lying if she said that the sensation of cold on her sun heated skin didn’t send a sharp jolt of arousal down her spine. The shiver that shakes her body isn’t really from the cold.

_“Jesus, Lexa! What the hell!”_

_“Hmmm?”_

_“What are you doing?”_

Clarke can hear Lexa move something inside of her mouth. She moves her head so that she can see what the other girl is doing, but Lexa’s frozen tongue stops her as she runs it the length of Clarke’s pulse point.

 _“Okay.”_ Clarke quickly scrambles out of Lexa’s arms. She stumbles slightly as she gets to her feet. She can barely hear Lexa make a sad sound behind her as her blood pounds in her ears. She needs to cool her body down, like now.

_“Clarke?”_

Clarke doesn’t respond as she makes her way down the shore, making a beeline for the water. Lexa watches on in amusement as Clarke quickly dives into the ocean in an attempt to calm herself down. She breaks through the water with a loud gasp as the freezing cold ocean water shatters the thick fog of lust surrounding her brain. Fish lets out a small bark before bolting down the sand behind Clarke.

 _“Fish!!”_ Lexa yells after the puppy, but he is already in the water, swimming towards Clarke. Clarke notices the husky coming towards her, she lets out a laugh as she takes the puppy into her arms.

Lexa knows that she should probably follow Clarke down into the water, she is pretty worked up herself. But she knows that she can’t. If she goes into the ocean, there is nothing stopping her from taking Clarke under the cover of the water. And she’s pretty sure that they would both drown if that were to happen. It would be so, so worth it.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**~General POV~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

The rest of the afternoon carries on without much incidence, both women keeping a respectable distance between them since they can’t seem to keep their hands off of each other.

By the end of their beach trip, they are both on edge, but tired from their day in the sun. Originally, Lexa had planned a date night for them, but after the events of the day, they both decided to have a date night in their hotel room.

Lexa called for room service while Clarke was in the shower. After Clarke emerged from the bathroom sporting nothing but a tiny towel, Lexa made a beeline for the bathroom. She had to get away from Clarke before she pounced on the other woman. She wanted nothing more than to have her way with her girlfriend. But there would be plenty of time for that, later. Now it was time for a shower. A very cold shower.

Lexa couldn’t lie, she was very tempted to take matters into her own hands while she was in the shower, pun very much intended. She had been on edge all day and desperately craved some sort of release. She knew that it wouldn’t be long before she had her way with Clarke, but her resolve to wait was quickly crumbling.

Just as her hand is making her decision for her, the shower curtain is pulled back. Lexa startles at the sudden intrusion, almost slipping on the slick porcelain of the shower. She quickly gathers her bearings, turning to glare at Clarke.

_“You scared the hell out of me, Clarke.”_

_“Sorry.”_ Clarke’s eyes unabashedly travel down Lexa’s wet, naked body. As her gaze travels down Lexa’s form, she has to bite back a groan. _“God, Lexa, you are so fucking hot.”_

 _“Thank y…”_ Lexa’s words are cut off as Clarke pushes her way into the shower, fusing her lips to the brunette’s. Lexa gasps into Clarke’s mouth as her back is pressed up against the cold tile of the shower. Her hands reach out to grasp Clarke’s hips, gripping wet fabric tightly.

Wait, what? Fabric? Lexa pulls away from Clarke’s intoxicating lips.

 _“Clarke,”_ She breathes out, gasping to catch her breath. _“Why are you dressed?”_

Instead of replying, Clarke moves her attention to Lexa’s neck. Her lips ghost across the water slicked skin, causing goosebumps to break out across Lexa’s body. Clarke’s hands rest on Lexa’s hips, pulling the brunette into her body as she bites down on Lexa’s pulse point.

 _“Klark…”_ Lexa groans out as Clarke continues to nip and suck on her neck. Lexa’s fingers start to fidget with the wet fabric of Clarke’s shirt. She pulls at the shirt, hoping that Clarke will get the hint and remove it.

Clarke pulls away momentarily, allowing Lexa to pull the shirt over her head. She tosses the wet top over the shower curtain before seeking out Clarke’s mouth again. Her hands immediately slide up Clarke’s torso, coming to rest on the ample chest that she is completely obsessed with.

 _“Lex,”_ Clarke breathes out against Lexa’s ear as she takes the lobe into her mouth. _“You’ve been driving me crazy all day.”_

_“Me? You started it.”_

_“Nope,”_ Clarke nips Lexa’s earlobe, eliciting a hiss out of the brunette. _“That was all you.”_

 _“Beja, Klark.”_ Lexa groans out as Clarke’s hands slide down her body. Clarke grabs Lexa’s left leg, wrapping it around her hip.

_“What do you need, Lex?”_

_“Jos nou hod op.”_

_“I don’t know what you’re talking about, but I’m assuming that you want me to keep going.”_

_“Sha.”_

Clarke scrapes her nails bluntly across Lexa’s left thigh as she seeks out her prize. The instant her fingers slide through Lexa’s folds, she lets out a loud gasp.

_“Jeez, babe, you’re soaked.”_

_“Can you blame me? I have a smoking hot girlfriend who likes to tease me.”_

_“Is that so?”_ Clarke questions quietly as her fingers circle around Lexa’s clit. She smirks as Lexa groans, her head falling against the cold tile of the shower with a thud. _“If I recall correctly, you’re the one that tried to get us arrested for indecent exposure.”_

 _“I wasn’t trying….fuck, Clarke.”_ Lexa’s words falter and end in a groan as Clarke’s fingers slide down to tease at her entrance. The way that Clarke has her hips pressed against the tile make it damn near impossible to move, but Lexa tries anyway. She manages to roll her hips a little, causing two of Clarke’s fingers to slip inside of her. Lexa’s head drops into the nook of Clarke’s neck, a whimper escaping her lips as Clarke’s fingers curl just right.

She has been on edge all day and she knows that she isn’t going to last long, even with the agonizingly slow pace that Clarke is set on. She bites down on Clarke’s pulse point, hoping that her girlfriend will get the hint and speed her pace up, just a little. A part of her is enjoying the soft, loving way that Clarke is taking her, while the rest of her really wants Clarke to dominate her and fuck her senseless.

Clarke groans at the pleasurable pain of being bitten, but she keeps up her slow pace, driving Lexa to the point of insanity. Clarke’s next thrust is deeper than the last, but still torturously slow.

 _“Clarke, please.”_ Lexa groans out, her breath hot against Clarke’s neck.

 _“Please, what?”_ Clarke whispers into Lexa’s ear. She rolls her hips with her next thrust, fingers moving deeply inside of her girlfriend.

_“Jesus….please fuck me..”_

_“I am.”_

_“I need more.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“I need more.”_

Clarke’s had every intention of teasing Lexa when she got into the shower with her. She’d been on edge all day because of Lexa’s antics while they were on the beach and she was ready to make her girlfriend pay. Her plan was to hop into the shower with Lexa so that she could seduce her. She wanted to tease Lexa until she was on the brink of an orgasm before leaving her hanging, so to speak.

All her plans fly out the window when she hears the desperate tone of Lexa’s voice. She was going slow on purpose, trying to drive Lexa as crazy as possible. As soon as Lexa started begging, she knew that she was about to lose the game. The game that Lexa didn’t even know that she was playing.

She so badly wants to drop to her knees and make Lexa come with her mouth, but she knows that her girlfriend doesn’t particularly care for oral. Lexa was reluctant to let Clarke go down on her the first and only time that she allowed her to. However, she agreed, and even seemed to really enjoy it. But Clarke hasn’t asked since the first time, because the last thing that she wants to do is make Lexa uncomfortable.

So, she curls her free hand around Lexa’s hip, pulling their bodies flush together. For a minute, Clarke forgets that her other hand is preoccupied, two fingers still deep inside of Lexa. Until Lexa rolls her hips with a whine, desperately urging Clarke to move.

 _“Fuck, Clarke…please move.”_ Lexa mumbles into Clarke’s neck.

_“Sorry, babe.”_

Clarke pulls back slightly so that she can turn her attention back to the task at hand. She presses her lips softly against Lexa’s water slicked skin, moving her mouth across her chest. With the next thrust of her fingers, she closes her lips around Lexa’s nipple. Her teeth scrape lightly against the sensitive flesh as she lashes her tongue across it. Lexa groans loudly, canting her hips against Clarke’s hand.

 _“Lexie, you’re so tight,”_ Clarke mumbles against Lexa’s chest, swirling her tongue around the dusky nipple. _“I love the way you feel around my fingers.”_

Lexa’s brain is absolute mush. Clarke’s fingers are playing her like a finely tuned instrument and she can’t focus on anything else. She tries to respond to Clarke, she really does. All she can manage is a keening mewl as Clarke’s thumb ghosts over her clit.

She’s on sensory overload right now, completely at Clarke’s mercy. Her body is raging inferno as she races towards what she knows is going to be an amazing climax. The husky tone of Clarke’s voice as she says dirty things to Lexa are only serving to build her up faster. She knows that she isn’t going to last much longer, and honestly, she isn’t even embarrassed about it.

Lexa tangles her fingers into Clarke’s blonde locks, tugging on the wet strands slightly. Clarke groans out in pleasure, but doesn’t move her attentions away from Lexa’s chest. As much as Lexa is enjoying Clarke’s assault on her nipple, she wants to feel her girlfriend’s full lips against her own. She tightens her grip and tugs harder, forcing Clarke’s head away from her chest.

For a second Lexa worries that she was too rough with Clarke. Her fear is quickly abated when Clarke’s darkened blues lift to meet her gaze. The look in Clarke’s eyes is purely animalistic, unhinged and wild. She lunges forward and captures Lexa’s lips in a searing kiss as she doubles her efforts, practically slamming Lexa up against the shower wall with each thrust of her fingers. Clarke’s brow is furrowed in concentration as she brings Lexa closer to the edge. She can tell that her girlfriend is almost there, the tightening of Lexa’s inner walls making it difficult for Clarke to move.

The next thrust of her fingers is what sends Lexa hurdling over the edge. Clarke curls her fingers just right, hitting the soft, spongy area of Lexa’s front wall. As Lexa gasps out her approval, Clarke firmly rolls her thumb over her girlfriend’s clit. A gush of wetness that isn’t from the shower water soaks Clarke’s hand, followed by a guttural scream from Lexa.

The scream that comes out of Lexa’s mouth is muffled by Clarke’s lips. Clarke’s thankful that she was kissing Lexa, otherwise they would’ve had a noise complaint from their neighbors, she’s sure of it. Lexa bites down on Clarke’s bottom lip in the throes of her powerful climax, breaking the skin from the force.

Clarke is so entranced by Lexa’s orgasm that she doesn’t immediately feel the pain of Lexa biting down on her lip. It isn’t until Lexa pulls away quickly that Clarke can taste the metallic tang of blood in her mouth.

_“Oh shit. Clarke, I’m so sorry.”_

_“Huh?”_

_“Your lip.”_ Lexa swipes her thumb over Clarke’s lip, wiping away the blood that has collected there.

_“What about it?”_

_“I cut you.”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“I’m sorry.”_

_“S’fine.”_

_“No, it’s not. I’m so sorry that I hurt you.”_

_“You…you…”_ Clarke’s gaze is burning holes through Lexa. She still has that wild look in her eyes, but she also looks like she’s in awe? Her eyes travel down Lexa’s body, stopping when they reach the brunette’s center, where her fingers are still buried. She reluctantly pulls out of Lexa, earning a disappointed groan.

Her hand is glistening with Lexa’s release, and she is absolutely enthralled by it. Lexa’s eyes widen as she looks down at Clarke’s hand.

_“Oh my god.”_

Lexa would run for the hills if she could feel her legs. It’s a good thing that she still has her leg wrapped around Clarke’s hip, because she feels completely boneless right now. She feels thoroughly relaxed, but she is still pretty embarrassed. Not only did she make her girlfriend bleed, to add insult to injury, she peed on her.

_“Clarke, I am so sorry. This is so embarrassing.”_

_“What? Why?”_

_“Because I hurt you.”_

_“I told you, I’m fine. You bit my lip, no big deal. I liked it.”_

_“Yeah but I also….”_ Lexa gestures towards Clarke’s hand with a tilt of her head.

_“You what?”_

_“I didn’t mean to.”_

_“You can’t really control that.”_

_“Yeah I can. I mean, usually I can. I mean, I haven’t wet the bed since I was a child.”_

_“Wait, what?”_

_“I don’t know how that happened. I can’t believe that I peed on you.”_

_“Lexa.”_ Clarke uses her clean hand to tilt Lexa’s head back up. She meets Lexa’s watery gaze and feels her heart clench in her chest. _“Oh baby.”_ Clarke leans in to kiss Lexa’s lip tenderly, wincing slightly as her busted lip throbs. _“Is that what you think that you did?”_

_“Yeah, I mean, what else would it be?”_

_“Oh Lex…”_ Clarke laughs softly as she rests her forehead against Lexa’s. _“You didn’t pee on me.”_

_“I didn’t?”_

_“No baby.”_

_“So, what the hell did I do?”_

_“You really don’t know?”_

Lexa shakes her head vehemently, feeling her throat constrict with emotion. Clarke sees her girlfriend’s throat bob with exertion, her eyes welled up with unshed tears.

_“It wasn’t anything bad, I promise.”_

_“Tell me what it was, Clarke, please.”_

_“Well, you see. Sometimes when a woman has a really powerful orgasm, she can ejaculate.”_

_“Ew.”_

_“What?”_

_“Nothing. Go on.”_

_“That’s pretty much it. You came really hard and squirted. Not every woman can do that.”_

_“That’s gross.”_

_“No, it’s really not. It’s actually pretty fucking hot.”_

_“No, it’s gross. And totally embarrassing.”_

_“Don’t be embarrassed. Seriously, Lex. That was the hottest fucking thing that I’ve ever seen.”_

_“I don’t think so.”_

_“Well I do. I’ve never actually been able to make a girl squirt before.”_

_“Can we please stop talking about this now?”_

Before Clarke can respond, a loud knock reverberates through their room, startling both women.

_“Are you expecting anybody?”_

_“No…”_ Lexa wracks her brain, trying to figure out why somebody is knocking on their door. Surely she wasn’t that loud that she alerted the neighbors, right?

A loud rumble comes from Clarke’s stomach, making the blonde laugh.

_“Room service, maybe?”_

_“Oh yeah.”_

_“Come on, Heda, let’s go eat.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

**~Lexa’s POV~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Waking up with a face full of blonde hair was not something that Lexa was used to. Not that she would ever willingly admit it, but when she and Clarke cuddled while sleeping, she was always the small spoon. There was just something about being embraced by the blonde that was so completely relaxing. There were times when Clarke tried to get Lexa to be the big spoon, but she never really felt the need to.

Even with the mouthful of unruly blonde curls that she is currently sporting, Lexa can totally see the appeal of being the big spoon. The way that Clarke’s body all but melts against hers is so relaxing that Lexa can feel her body being lulled back to sleep.

The next time she wakes up she knows that it’s still really early. The sun has barely begun to poke through the drawn curtain of their hotel room. Clarke is sleeping blissfully in her arms, soft snores falling from the blonde’s slightly ajar mouth.

Lexa lifts her head off of her pillow so that she can glance at the bedside clock. The glaring red numbers confirm her suspicions. It’s only half past six in the morning. She’s been sleeping for less than six hours.

Being a very active person, her body has never required much sleep. She’s been known to be up well before the sun makes its appearance in the sky.

In the short time that she’s known Clarke, she’s learned that the blonde is quite the opposite when it comes to sleeping.

Clarke loves her sleep and will sometimes sleep late into the morning.

Part of her erratic sleep schedule comes from her random sparks of inspiration when it comes to her artwork. There have been a few times since she started hanging out with Clarke that she’d find the blonde hunched over a sketchbook as she got up for her morning run.

Right now, her body is urging her to get up for the day, even though Clarke kept her up until after midnight.

After being interrupted by the hotel staff member with their supper, both women ate ravenously on the plush mattress.

It wasn’t long after they finished that Lexa decided to return the favor and make Clarke scream her name, neighbors be damned.

A second round of vigorous sex quickly turned into round three, which of course had to turn into round four. For the sake of even numbers and all. Before either woman knew it, they had been at it in the bed for nearly five hours and they were both on the brink of exhaustion. Clarke fell asleep first, after turning her back to Lexa so that she could snuggle into the brunette’s naked body.

Lexa would be perfectly content with staying in bed wrapped around Clarke for the remainder of the day, but right now her bladder is screaming at her to get up. With a reluctant groan, she pulls her deliciously sore body off of the bed, careful not to jostle Clarke too much. She pads quietly to the bathroom, not even bothering to close the door behind her. After relieving herself, she quickly washes her hands. She chances a look in the mirror, barely managing to stifle a gasp.

Clarke has done quite a number on her neck, dark bruises and teeth marks visible on her fair skin.

Lexa runs her fingers over the marred skin, wincing slightly in pain.

Even if she didn’t like being marked by Clarke’s mouth (which she totally does), she wouldn’t have the right to be mad a Clarke for doing it. She split open the blonde’s bottom lip with her teeth, for goodness sake. But the thought of Clarke possessively sucking bruises into her skin only serves to turn her on.

She brushes her teeth and washes her face before exiting the bathroom, intent on crawling back into bed with Clarke for a little while.

Her plans are quickly thwarted when she sees that Clarke has completely taken over the bed in her absence. The blonde is on her back, sprawled out in the middle of the mattress. The blanket that was covering her body has slid down to her hips, revealing the two perfect breasts that Lexa is so, so gay for.

Granted, she’s pretty gay for more than just Clarke’s boobs, but that’s not the point.

Crawling back into the bed, Lexa swiftly pulls the covers off of Clarke’s very naked body. Clarke lets out a sleepy groan, but she doesn’t wake up. Lexa ogles her girlfriend, for just a second or ten, before moving to straddle the blonde’s hips.

_“Mmm, Lexa.”_

Lexa leans down to press her lips to Clarke’s. Her wavy brunette locks fan out over her shoulders, framing Clarke’s face perfectly. When she pulls away from Clarke’s lips, an errant strand of her hair lands on Clarke’s nose. Clarke lets out an airy laugh, squirming slightly as the hair tickles her face.

_“Lex…that tickles.”_

_“Sorry babe.”_

_“S’fine.”_

Lexa waits patiently for Clarke to wake up, but after a few minutes it becomes clear that her girlfriend is still dead to the world. Lexa would normally let Clarke be and allow her to wake up on her own, but if she’s being honest, she’s really bored. And she really wants some coffee.

So, after weighing her options of letting Clarke sleep, or dealing with a grumpy blonde for a few hours, she decides that coffee wins. Leaning back down, Lexa shakes her head, allowing her hair to brush across Clarke’s face. Clarke squeals loudly as she bucks her hips, attempting to throw Lexa off balance. Clarke’s eyes snap open, sleepy blue eyes trying to glare daggers at Lexa and failing miserably.

_“LEXA!!!”_

Instead of responding, Lexa’s hands slide down Clarke’s sides, her fingertips gripping the blonde’s naked hips. Clarke screams as Lexa’s fingers mercilessly tickle her, raucous laughter spilling from her lips. 

 _“Sss…sss…stop!!! Please…Lexa!!”_ Clarke gasps out as she struggles to catch her breath. Lexa laughs heartily as she continues her assault on Clarke’s body.

_“Okay, but only if you get out of bed.”_

_“Why???”_ Clarke whines between gasps.

_“Because I need coffee.”_

_“Coffee?”_

_“Yesssss, coffee.”_

If there is one thing that can make Clarke wake up early in the morning, it’s coffee. Well, coffee and sex. But they have had a lot of sex in the past twelve hours, and caffeine is a must right now. Maybe after they get coffee.

That’s the other thing that has changed since Lexa final gave Clarke a chance. She cannot get enough of the blonde. Lexa feels insatiable, like a damn teenager when she’s around Clarke. She would gladly spend all of her time worshipping Clarke’s body, if that was possible.

“So, do you wanna go get coffee with me, Klark?”

“Hmm,” Clarke’s hands slide up Lexa’s torso, eagerly coming to rest on the brunette’s very naked breasts. _“I would rather fuck you senseless.”_ Clarke brushes her thumbs over Lexa’s nipples, reveling in the moan that comes out of her mouth.

_“God, Clarke. You’re insatiable.”_

_“Well, you’re sexy. And naked on top of me. Can you really blame me?”_

_“No, but we don’t have time.”_

_“Don’t have time? We’re on vacation.”_

_“Yeah but it’s Wednesday. We have to be in San Diego tomorrow night because we have the rehearsal on Thursday and the wedding on Friday. And I have plans for us today.”_

_“Ugh, don’t remind me.”_

_“You aren’t excited to see your friend Bellamy get married?”_

_“That’s not it.”_

_“I know. But I promise you that I will not let your mother upset you.”_

_“Thanks…but you know, I wouldn’t mind some distracting from my impending reunion with my mom.”_ Clarke slides one of her hands down Lexa’s body, stopping when she reaches her girlfriend’s core. She teases the skin of Lexa’s inner thighs, earning a frustrated groan from the brunette’s lips.

_“Klarkkk…seriously…”_

_“Fine.”_

Clarke drops her hands from Lexa’s body with a huff, mockingly glaring at Lexa. Lexa chuckles at her girlfriend’s fake anger.

_“Babe, we just spent the entire night having sex. Don’t you want some nice, warm coffee?”_

_“Lex, the only warm thing that I want in my mouth is you.”_

Lexa lets out a disappointed huff. She knows that they don’t have time to start a fifth round. At least not if she wants to have time to take Clarke to Disneyland before they have to leave.

 _“How about a compromise?”_ Lexa’s green eyes scan over Clarke’s face. Clarke’s normally bright blue eyes are darkened with arousal. Her bottom lip is tucked between her teeth but Lexa can see the reddened cut. She feels a flood of remorse course through her body.

_“Okay, hit me.”_

_“If you get up, we have time for a shower before we head out.”_

_“Together?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Deal. Get off of me so that I can get off.”_

_“You’re so crass, Clarke.”_

_“You love it.”_

_“Let’s go, horn dog.”_ Lexa chuckles at her girlfriend as they both move to get off of the bed.

**~*~*~*~*~***

The coffee shop is packed when they walk in. It’s pretty surprising to Lexa considering that it is only eight in the morning. Granted, it’s a Tuesday and a lot of the people waiting in line are probably on their morning commute to work, but still.

What they anticipated to be a quick run in for coffee ends up being similar to standstill traffic. They’ve been waiting for over ten minutes now and it feels like the line hasn’t moved at all.

 _“I guess that we should’ve gone to Starbucks.”_ Lexa jokes. Clarke scoffs incredulously, smacking her girlfriend in the shoulder.

_“Lexa, that is sacrilegious and you know it. Indra would so kick your ass if she found out that you said that.”_

_“Good thing that she’ll never find out.”_

_“Hmmm, maybe, maybe not.”_

_“Clarke, you wouldn’t dare.”_

_“I dunno. You’ll have to be really nice to me in order for me to keep your secret.”_

_“Blackmail, eh?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Well, if you breathe a word of this to Indra, I will withhold sex for the foreseeable future.”_

_“Yeah right.”_

_“Try me…”_

Before Clarke can come up with a witty retort, Lexa’s phone blares out ‘Bad Girls’ by MIA. She pulls the device out of her pocket, smiling when she sees her best friend’s name pop up on the screen.

_“I’ll be right back, babe.”_

_“Yeah, yeah. Tell Anya that I said hi.”_

Lexa nods at Clarke as she swipes to answer the call. She moves away from the crowded counter, towards a less populated area of the café.

_“Hello?”_

_“Hey Lex.”_

_“Hey Ahn. How are you?”_

_“Good…I’m good. How are you doing?”_

_“I’m good. We’re standing in line at this ridiculous coffee shop before we head out towards Disneyland.”_

_“That’s awesome. I bet that you’re excited.”_

_“Of course I am. We’ve never been to Disney.”_

_“I know that, dumbass.”_

_“I miss you too, jerk.”_

_“So, I just wanted to call you to let you know that I just got home about fifteen minutes ago.”_

_“Okay, awesome. Have you seen everybody yet?”_

_“No. I saw my dad as he was running out the door to head to work. Mom was already gone when I got to the house. I guess that we are all going out to dinner tonight. And your mom is coming with.”_

_“That’s good. It will be good for her to get out of the house. She works way too much.”_

_“Yeah. Mom said that she’s been making Lily take time off lately. They’ve been going to that farmer’s market that they used to take us to when we were younger. Apparently they have also been going to those wine and paint things…”_

_“That’s awesome.”_

_“Yeah. I’m glad that they are working less.”_

_“Same. It’s good for them to take time off.”_

_“Agreed.”_

Lexa smiles as she listens to Anya talk about her drive home. She turns her attention towards the line to see if they are any closer to getting their drinks. She really wants to be able to spend the day at Disneyland with Clarke, but she knows that they are on a tight schedule to get her home.

She lets out a sigh of relief when she sees her beautiful girlfriend approach the barista at the counter.

The guy behind the counter is objectively attractive. Even with Lexa’s proficiency in her appreciation of the female gender, she can still admit when a male is ascetically pleasing to the eye.

Lexa has never been a jealous person. When Costia was still alive she’d had to deal with her girlfriend being hit on quite a few times and she had never been jealous about it. If she had known at the time that Costia was cheating on her, she might have been a little jealous, but that is so not the point. At the time she was confident that her girlfriend was faithful to her and that the flirting was innocent.

Clarke was gorgeous, Lexa knew that. She knew that she would have to deal with other people flirting with her girlfriend at some point.

Little did she know how much it was going to affect her the first time that it happened.

She can feel her body fill with rage as she watches the guy smile sweetly at her girlfriend. Clarke returns the smile before saying something to the guy that Lexa can’t hear.

_“Lexa? You okay?”_

_“Hmmm?”_

_“Have you been listening to me?”_

_“Of course.”_

_“What did I just say to you then?”_

_“I don’t know, something about Raven.”_

_“No, not even close. I was talking to you about one of my dad’s patients.”_

_“Were you?”_

_“Yes. Jesus Christ. Is Clarke like going down on you right now?”_

_“No. I don’t even like that. Plus we’re getting coffee.”_

_“I will never understand you, Lexa Woods. Who doesn’t like oral? It’s weird.”_

_“It’s not weird, actually. It’s a very normal thing.”_

_“I bet it’s because Cos wasn’t very good at it. I mean she should’ve been…with how many people she fucked behind your back.”_

_“Anya! Please….can we not talk about this?”_

_“I mean, from what I hear, Clarke is pretty damn good at going down on a lady.”_

_“Why would you know that?”_

_“Raven. She and Clarke had sex once. Raven said that Clarke was particularly gifted when it came to oral.”_

_“Wait, what?”_

_“Oh, now I have your attention.”_

_“Wait. Did that actually happen?”_

_“Yes. Raven said that they hooked up once their sophomore year.”_

_“I did not know that.”_

_“Apparently they don’t really talk about it. They don’t regret it or anything. It’s just common knowledge in their friend group.”_

_“Wow…that’s wow.”_

_“If by wow, you mean totally fucking hot, then you’re right.”_

_“Really, Anya?”_

_“Yeah. I mean, Raven’s hot. Your girlfriend is hot. Why would the two of them having sex not get your engine revving?”_

_“I don’t know.”_

_“Lexa, you are a disgrace to the gay community if you aren’t turned on by that.”_

_“Well, I’m in a public place, so being aroused would not be ideal right now.”_

_“Why are you so distracted then?”_

_“Because some fuck boy is flirting with my girlfriend.”_

_“Oh…is little Lexie jealous?”_

_“No.”_

_“Don’t be a branwoda. I know when you’re lying, Lexa.”_

_“I’m not.”_

_“Please, bitch. I’ve known you for twenty four years now. You can’t fool me.”_

_“Fine. So maybe I don’t like it.”_

_“I don’t think that there is a maybe about it. So, tell me, Miss Woods, what bothers you more. The fact that Clarke is being flirted with? Or the fact that said interested party is in fact, a male?”_

Anya’s question makes Lexa stop and think. Is she simply jealous because somebody else is flirting with her girlfriend? Or is she jealous because Clarke is being hit on by a guy? The simple answer would be that it the jealousy stems from another person showing interest in her girlfriend. She hadn’t even thought about the fact that the person in question was a guy.

At least not until Anya so delicately pointed it out.

Her best friend has always had a penchant for not sugarcoating questions.

Lexa didn’t want to be that girl. She didn’t want to be inconsiderate of her girlfriend’s sexuality. She knew that there were a lot of people in the gay community were dismissive of bisexual people. She heard them referred to as just being selfish or keen on experimenting.

Lexa didn’t feel that way, or at least she didn’t think that she did. She knew that Clarke had strong feelings for her and from what the blonde had told her, she was sure of her attraction to both genders. She had never doubted that Clarke liked both men and women, until her asshole of a best friend opened her big mouth.

Part of her doubt and apprehension probably comes from being cheated on. Costia was also bisexual and after she had passed, Lexa found out that she was actively seeing another girl and a guy back at school. Not just sleeping with, but dating.

It’s not like she didn’t trust Clarke, because she most definitely did, there was just something about the way that this guy was smiling at her that made Lexa’s body flare with jealousy.

_“Anya, I’ll call you later.”_

_“Okay, are you okay?”_

_“M’fine.”_

_“Heda, chil au.”_

_“Onya, ai laik ku.”_

_“Kei. Jos laik kefa.”_

_“Sha, sis.”_

_“Mochof, strisis.”_

_“Pro.”_

Lexa ends the call and slips her cell phone into her jean pocket. She looks up at the counter to see the barista still talking to her girlfriend.

Okay, seriously, this is starting to get ridiculous. Clarke was literally ordering two drinks. There is absolutely no reason why she should still be standing there, talking to ‘fuck boy’ barista.

**_~Alright, Lexa. You need to get your shit together. Even if this guy is blatantly flirting with your girlfriend, she probably doesn’t realize it. Or maybe she does, she’s probably just being nice and doesn’t know how to turn this guy down.~_ **

Her inner monologue manages to calm her raging jealousy, for about thirty seconds. As soon as fuck boy has the audacity to put his hand on Clarke’s arm, her rage comes back tenfold. She’s moving across the café like the damn building is on fire, trying to calm herself down so she doesn’t punch this dude in the face.

Clarke’s head turns as Lexa makes her approach. The blonde smiles brightly as she watches her girlfriend walk up to the counter. Until she notices the rage plastered on Lexa’s face. Her smile fades as she sees the fire dancing behind Lexa’s eyes.

 _“Hey babe.”_ Lexa wraps her arm around Clarke’s waist. Clarke opens her mouth to reply, but Lexa smashes their lips together before she can.

Clarke is slightly breathless when Lexa breaks the kiss. The fair skin of her cheeks is reddened in a blush.

_“Hey, Lex. How’s Anya?”_

_“Good, she’s good. Did you order our drinks already?”_

_“Yeah. I was just trying to pay but Jason wouldn’t let me.”_

_“Oh yeah? Why’s that?”_

_“I was just telling Clarke that a beautiful woman should never have to pay for her coffee.”_

Lexa has to actually stop her eyes from rolling out of her head. This fuck boy is apparently as dense as he looks.

_“Yeah, I don’t usually make my girlfriend pay for her coffee.”_

_“Oh, well. I told Clarke that she could have whatever she wanted. The only payment that I require is her presence for a drink tonight.”_

_“Sorry Jacob…that’s never going to happen.”_

_“It’s Jason. And why don’t you let your friend answer for herself?”_

_“Because Jeff, I’m paying for Clarke’s drink.”_

_“My name is Jason.”_

_“That’s what I said.”_

_“No, you called me Jeff.”_

_“Eh, same difference.”_

_“It’s really not, but your friend can have a free coffee. All I want is one date.”_

_“Oh my god, dude, are you really that vapid?”_

_“What are you talking about, lady?”_

_“Alright, Jethro, I’m going to talk real slow because apparently you can’t pick up on cues very well. Clarke isn’t going to meet you for a drink tonight, or ever, okay?”_

_“How do you know?”_

_“Because dumbass, she’ll be with me.”_

_“So? She can’t leave you alone for a little while so that she can hang out with me?”_

_“No.”_

_“That’s not really your decision to make, now is it?”_

_“Well, actually, it kind of is.”_

_“Why? Do you control all of your friends?”_

_“No. I don’t control my girlfriend. But I would assume that she wouldn’t go out on a date with somebody else.”_

_“Why not? She might have a good time.”_

_“Okay dude. As much fun as this is, we really have places to be today. My GIRLFRIEND here is not going out with you. Not because I control her, but because she is in a relationship. I don’t know why you can’t seem to grasp that concept. Clarke and I are dating, not just hanging out. So, if you would kindly let us pay so that we can get our coffees, we will get on with our day.”_

_“But she was flirting with me.”_

_“I so wasn’t. Lexa, you have to believe me.”_

Clarke’s blue eyes are pleading with Lexa. The brunette actually feels bad for her possessive rage. She squeezes Clarke’s waist softly, letting her know that she believes her.

_“Jeez, lady. You don’t have to be so rude about it.”_

_“Well, maybe I wouldn’t be, if some fuck boy wasn’t hitting on my girlfriend.”_

_“Lex..”_

_“Clarke it’s fine. I just want to pay so that we can leave.”_

The barista slides both drinks across the counter towards the two women.

_“Don’t worry about it. Drinks on the house.”_

_“Nope. Not going to happen.”_ Lexa pulls a twenty out of her wallet, slapping it on the counter before grabbing her iced chai. _“Keep the change. Use it to take a single girl out for a drink, maybe.”_

Before the barista can respond, Lexa tightens her hold on Clarke’s waist, leading her girlfriend away from the counter. She leads them out of the café and towards the rental car. She opens the passenger side door for Clarke first, helping her girlfriend into the car. Walking to the other side of the car, Lexa gets in and sets her drink in the cup holder.

_“Lexie.”_

_“Hmm.”_

_“Are you okay?”_

_“I’m fine.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Yeah. Just give me a second, please.”_

_“Okay.”_

Lexa lets out a deep exhale, turning the key in the ignition to start the car. She almost wishes that Fish was with them to break the awkward tension, but they had to leave him in the hotel. They didn’t want to leave him in his crate, so Clarke puppy proofed the bathroom and they shut him in there before they left.

Pulling out of the parking lot, Lexa lets her mind wander to the events that just transpired. She’s not mad at Clarke, really. She’s mad at the barista for not getting the hint and she’s mad at herself for letting any doubt creep into her mind. It takes a lot for her to lose her temper like that, and she doesn’t like the person that she just became.

But, for the life of her, she can’t completely shake the urge to possess. She wants to let the entire world know that Clarke is her girlfriend. She had the urge to pull Clarke into the bathroom of the café so that she could fuck her senseless and make her scream. If it weren’t for the fact that doing so would be so, so unsanitary, she very well might have.

They still have two hours before the park opens, and despite their earlier tryst in the shower, Lexa is raring to go again. Honestly, she could take Clarke back to the hotel, but she doesn’t want to wait. She drives around for a few minutes, looking for a secluded area to pull over. Which is damn near impossible anywhere in California. Before she knows it, they are near their hotel again, much to her dismay.

_“Where are we going, Lexa?”_

_“The park doesn’t open until ten.”_

_“So why in the hell did we get up at the butt crack of dawn?”_

_“I didn’t hear you complaining.”_

_“That’s kind of hard to do when you do that thing with your tongue.”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“Take the compliment, Heda.”_

Lexa pulls into the parking garage of the hotel, looking for a parking spot. She finds one that is pretty secluded. It is off in a corner, with no cars parked nearby. She pulls into the spot and puts the car in park, but doesn’t turn the ignition off.

_“So, Lexie, are we going to talk about that macho lady display at the café?”_

_“I…uh..I’m sorry, Clarke. That was terribly possessive and uncalled for.”_

_“It was actually really fucking hot.”_

_“What?”_

_“Seeing you get all silverback gorilla on that guy, puffing out your chest and claiming me as yours…so hot.”_

_“Okay. So, you like it when I act like a crazy, possessive animal, do you?”_ Lexa turns to face Clarke with a smirk on her face.

_“Abso-fucking-lutely. I was waiting for you to drag me into the bathroom so that you could fuck me senseless.”_

_“I thought about it, actually.”_

_“Did you really?”_

_“Yes. I wanted nothing more than to show that douche nozzle who you were with, to make you scream my name loud enough for him to hear.”_

_“So, why didn’t you?”_

_“Because that is so unhygienic.”_

_“Please. We so had sex in the bathroom at Grounder’s.”_

_“That’s different.”_

_“How so?”_

_“Because, you had just cleaned the bathroom. Plus, the sex was technically only on the counter by the sink.”_

_“Still counts.”_

_“I think that maybe you wanted me to drag you into the bathroom and claim you, Miss Griffin. A little bit of a voyeur, are we?”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

**~General POV~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Jealousy. That was Lexa’s biggest weakness when it comes to Clarke. That and probably Clarke’s boobs, but that is not the point.

Their first kiss and Clarke’s giant hickey were a result of Lexa being jealous of Niylah. The first time they had sex was because of Lexa’s jealousy towards Harper.

Clarke knew that Lexa was easily riled up when it came to other people flirting with her. And all of this was before they were technically dating. SO now that they are an item, Clarke is pretty sure that that she can get Lexa to lose her poorly maintained control. And Clarke likes nothing more than playing with fire when it comes to Lexa.

Adjusting her body in the passenger seat so that she can face Lexa, Clarke smiles wickedly.

_“You know. Harper and I frequented that counter.”_

_“Is that so?”_

_“Yeah. Maybe I do have a little bit of a voyeuristic side, even if we were closed every time it happened. Just the idea of being caught is kind of hot, don’t you think?”_

_“I suppose that I can see the appeal, if you’re willing to risk being fired or arrested.”_

_“Hmmm…it’s kind of hard to care about that when somebody is going down on you.”_

Clarke can see the flash of anger in Lexa’s eyes. She knows that she should probably back down so that she doesn’t upset Lexa, but she wants Lexa to lose control. She wants Lexa to dominate her. So, she pushes.

_“You do know that Jason wrote his phone number on my cup, right?”_

_“Are you serious?”_

_“Yeah. Under the cup sleeve it says, in case you change your mind, call me.”_

Lexa reaches over and grabs Clarke’s cup out of the cup holder. She pulls down the cup sleeve and sure enough, Clarke was telling the truth.

The fuck boy wrote his damn phone number on her girlfriend’s cup. After multiple attempts of shutting him down.

Lexa can’t believe the audacity of that man-boy.

Scoffing loudly, Lexa opens her door so that she can throw the cup out of the car.

_“Hey! I was still drinking that, Lex.”_

_“Too bad.”_

Clarke opens her mouth to respond, probably to scold Lexa for her sassy attitude. Right now, Lexa wants, no needs, to make Clarke hers. In every single way that she possibly can. So, she leans over the middle console so that she can press her lips insistently against Clarke’s. She nips harshly at her girlfriend’s plump bottom lip, reveling in the groan that Clarke breathes out against her mouth.

She thinks about that jackass boy hitting on Clarke. She doesn’t want to, but it’s like her brain wants to torture her. She can feel the rage build up in her body as she thinks about Clarke and Harper. And Clarke and Niylah. And last but certainly not least, Clarke and Raven.

Just as fast as the kiss began, it ends. Clarke lets out a soft hiss and pulls away. Lexa’s eyes snap open as she tastes the metallic tang of blood on her lips. Clarke’s eyes are dangerously dark, with arousal and anger maybe?

_“Fuck, Lexa. That’s still tender.”_

_“Get out of the front seat.”_ Lexa growls, her fingers clenched around the steering wheel.

_“What?”_

_“Get out of the front and go to the back seat.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Just do it.”_

Clarke glances at her girlfriend quickly. Lexa’s eyes are screwed shut as her body faces straight ahead. Her jaw is clenched tightly and her breathing is labored.

Clarke can feel the anger and jealousy coming off of Lexa in waves, and she would be lying if she said that it didn’t turn her on.

Lexa rarely gets rough with her, so when she does, Clarke loves it.

She wants to put up a fight, make Lexa angrier than she already is, but she is already playing with fire. So, instead of teasing Lexa, she reluctantly complies, getting out of the passenger seat. She climbs into the backseat, laying down across the seats.

She closes her eyes in anticipation, trying desperately to calm her pounding heart.

Before too long she hears Lexa leave the driver’s side, but she chooses to keep her eyes closed. She feels the driver’s side back door open against her feet. Lexa is quiet as she climbs into the backseat, Clarke doesn’t realize that Lexa is back there until she feels the brunette straddle her hips. Clarke opens her eyes, only to have Lexa cover them with her hand.

_“Ah ah ah. We’re going to keep those beautiful blue eyes closed.”_

Clarke feels Lexa slip something soft and warm over her eyes, effectively blindfolding her. The fabric smells like Lexa, leading Clarke to believe that it’s her shirt. Her suspicions are confirmed when she feels Lexa’s bare skin brush against her hands. Lexa’s hands grip the hem of Clarke’s shirt, lifting the fabric carefully over her head.

_“Lex….what are you doing?”_

_“So, earlier today when I was talking to Anya, she told me something interesting.”_ Lexa’s hands lightly move across Clarke’s torso. Clarke lets out a gasp, because Lexa’s hands are cold. Ice cold.

_“Lexa. Why are your hands so cold?”_

_“Hmm. Anya told me that you and Raven have hooked up before.”_

This time Lexa brings a hand up to trace over Clarke’s collarbones. Her fingers are still extremely cold, and they are leaving a wet trail across her heated skin.

_“Yeah, so?”_

_“I just thought that it was interesting that you’ve never told me.”_

_“It was not a big deal.”_

_“No?”_

_“Not really. It happened once. Early last year. We went to a party at one of Lincoln’s friend’s houses. We were drinking and it just sort of happened.”_

_“Just once?”_

_“Yes. Well, just one night. I don’t remember how many times that night, but it was definitely more than once.”_

_“Interesting. So, tell me, did Raven ever make you feel like this?”_

Lexa’s fingers slip underneath the lacy material of Clarke’s bra, pulling the straps down her shoulders to expose her favorite boobs, ever. The air immediately assaults Clarke’s bare chest, her nipples hardening against the cold. Clarke can only groan in response at the change in temperature.

_“Tell me, Klark. Tell me about the time that Raven fucked you.”_

_“No.”_

_“No?”_

_“I don’t want to talk about Raven right now.”_

_“Hmmm, that’s just too bad.”_

Clarke feels Lexa lean down. She expects her girlfriend to kiss her, but she is disappointed for about two seconds. Instead of kissing her, Lexa leans down and takes a nipple into her mouth. Clarke can’t stop the gasp from leaving her mouth at the sensation. Lexa’s mouth should be warm, but it is in fact, very cold. Clarke can feel Lexa moving a piece of ice in her mouth as she swirls her tongue around the stiffened bud. Clarke’s back arches off of the seat, the movement pressing her chest harder against Lexa’s mouth.

_“Fuck, Lexie.”_

Lexa hums around Clarke’s nipple, flicking her cold tongue against the sensitive bud. Clarke gasps loudly, bringing her hands up to tangle into Lexa’s hair.

 _“Are you going to tell me, Klark?”_ Lexa bites down on Clarke’s nipple, as she cups the neglected breast with her hand.

_“Fuck. Am I going to tell you what?”_

_“About you and Raven.”_

_“No.”_

_“Or you and Harper.”_

_“Dammit, Lexa.”_

_“Or maybe Niylah.”_

_“Why do you want me to tell you about other people while you’re touching me like this?”_

_“I just want to know if they ever made you feel like I do.”_ Lexa’s free hand slides down Clarke’s abdomen, stopping on the button of her jeans. She quickly pops the button, sliding the zipper down.

Clarke tries to respond, she really does. But the only thing that her jumbled brain can manage is an undignified grunt as Lexa’s hand slips into her jeans.

Lexa seems intent on teasing Clarke until she gets the answer that she wants, her hand coming to rest on top of Clarke’s panties. She’s sure that this pair of underwear is ruined, her arousal has soaked through the fabric. Granted, this isn’t the first pair of underwear that have been ruined because of Lexa, but still. Clarke really liked this pair, dammit. She tries to cant her hips, just a little, in search of some sort of friction. Because she’s about to explode, for fuck’s sake. But Lexa’s weight is pressed into her just right, pinning her hips into the seat.

_“Lex…”_

_“You know what you need to do, Klark.”_ Lexa’s hand ghosts over Clarke’s underwear, enough to tease but not to do much else.

_“But, why?”_

_“Because I asked.”_

_“No, Lexa. Nobody makes me feel like you do. Is that what you want to hear?”_

_“Hmmm.”_ Lexa removes her hand from Clarke’s breast, shuffling around with something. When she comes back to Clarke’s chest, her mouth moves to the other nipple. Her tongue is cold, a piece of ice resting inside of her cheek. _“That doesn’t sound very convincing.”_

 _“Lexa!”_ Clarke sobs out, desperate for anything at this point in time. _“Please for the love of everything that is holy, just fuck me already.”_

_“I don’t know, Klark. Do bad girls who like it when other people flirt with them when they are clearly taken deserve to be fucked?”_

_“God, yes. Please.”_ Clarke moans out. She loves it when Lexa swears. There is something that is just so filthy about hearing Lexa say fuck. It instantly turns Clarke on, even though she isn’t sure that’s possible right now.

 _“Well then, tell me.”_ Lexa slips her hand underneath the flimsy barrier of Clarke’s panties, sliding two fingers through her girlfriend’s drenched folds. _“Who does this belong to?”_

 _“Ohhh, fuck!”_ Clarke’s hips shift upwards as Lexa’s fingers teasingly move against her. _“Lexa, please.”_

_“Wanheda’s gadagapa liak ain, Klark.”_

_“Beja, Leksa.”_

_“Jok.”_

Lexa knows that she can’t keep teasing Clarke. Well, she could, but she is starting to feel bad about it. She can’t see all of Clarke’s face right now, but her girlfriend is desperate, completely at her mercy.

_“Lift up your hips, baby.”_

Clarke obliges Lexa’s request, helping the brunette pull her jeans down.

Lexa has to bite down on her bottom lip to stifle her groan. She can see Clarke’s arousal on her thighs, glistening on her pale skin. She licks her lips in anticipation as she yanks at the ruined panties, ripping the fabric off of Clarke’s body.

_“Hey. I like those underwear Lexa!”_

_“So did I, but they were ruined.”_

_“You owe me a new pair.”_

_“Whatever you say, baby. Put it on my tab.”_

Both women chuckle slightly, the tense air abated for the time being.

Lexa grabs her cup, pulling out more ice before popping it into her mouth. It takes some adjusting to get her and Clarke in the right position in the small car, but she manages to make it work.

Even though she feels bad for teasing Clarke so much, she can’t help but enjoy it. And she’s not quite done yet.

She kisses her way up Clarke’s legs, taking her time in her ascent. She holds the ice between her teeth, her cold lips traversing across Clarke’s naked skin.

_“Lexie….please.”_

_“Mmmm..”_

Lexa pulls away so that she can put more ice into her mouth. She leans back down to nip at Clarke’s thighs before she reaches her prize. She can taste Clarke’s arousal at the tops of her thighs, heady and sweet.

The first swirl of her tongue around Clarke’s clit makes the blonde scream out loud. The sensation is cold yet warm at the same time. Clarke’s hands blindly search for Lexa’s hair, tangling into the wavy brunette locks. She tugs at the strands, pulling Lexa firmly against her core.

_“Fuck! God, Lexa. That feels so good.”_

Lexa hums in approval at Clarke’s praise. She moves her tongue down Clarke’s folds, circling the blonde’s entrance. She presses her tongue inside of Clarke, reveling in the loud moan that her girlfriend lets out. Clarke is tight around her tongue, her hands pulling Lexa’s hair almost to the point of pain. Lexa moans against Clarke’s center at the sensation of having her hair pulled.

The amount of teasing, along with the cold sensation from the ice is hurdling Clarke towards the edge, quickly. She knows that she isn’t going to last long, but she is desperate for her release. She cants her hips up at each thrust of Lexa’s tongue, moaning each time Lexa licks into her.

 _“Lex, I’m gonna….ugh, fuck.”_ Clarke gasps, breathless. _“I’m going to cum soon.”_

_“I want you to cum for me. So that everybody knows who you belong to. Who makes you lose control, Klark?”_

_“Jesus, fuck. I belong to you, Heda. You are the only one who can make me lose control. Beja, Leksa. Jok ai.”_

_“Ai gaf in yu ge kom op, Klark.”_

Lexa pulls her tongue out of Clarke, moving back up to her clit before she can protest. She presses the small piece of ice in her mouth against the bundle of nerves, simultaneously sliding two fingers into the blonde. She thrusts in deeply, curling her fingers as she circles the sensitive nub.

It only takes a few thrusts of her fingers, ending with a curl to Clarke’s front wall to send the blonde over the edge, Lexa’s name being chanted like a prayer.

_“LEXA!!!!”_

Lexa continues her ministrations, leading Clarke through her orgasm.

Before too long, Clarke pushes against Lexa’s shoulder to stop the brunette as the sensitivity becomes overwhelming for her.

Lexa sits back on her haunches, catching her breath. Clarke flops against the seat, boneless and spent. Lexa pulls her shirt off of Clarke’s eyes, eager to see her girlfriend’s baby blues.

Clarke’s eyes are screwed shut, her chest heaving as she breathes. Lexa caresses Clarke’s cheek lovingly, rousing the blonde from her dreamlike state. Clarke’s eyes scan Lexa’s face, a dopey smile plastered on the blonde’s face.

_“Mmmm, you’re amazing.”_

_“No, you are.”_

_“Give me a minute and then it’s your turn.”_

_“Don’t worry about it, baby. Rest now.”_

Clarke’s eyes drift closed as exhaustion takes over. Lexa smiles at the slumbering blonde. She shifts Clarke to her side so that she can lay down next to her and cuddle into her side.

It’s not long before Lexa feels sleep claim her body, the warmth of Clarke’s body lulling her to dreamland.

They have time to rest before heading to Disneyland. It’s a vacation after all.

**TBC**

**Translations:**

**Em pleni, Reivon. Taim nab ants. NAU!!! - Enough, Raven. Let’s go. NOW!!!**

**Sha, Reivon kom Skaikru. Mafta ai op. Nau, gada. - Yes, Raven of the Sky People. Follow me. Now, girl.**

**Onya. Tel ai op niron to hod op bilaik goufa. - Anya. Tell your lover to stop being a child.**

**Chit? - What?**

**Em laik goufa. - She’s a child.**

**Mochof. - Thank you.**

**Pro. - You’re welcome.**

**Shopta, Onya? - How are you, Anya?**

**Ai laik ku. - I am fine.**

**Yu get kiln? - Are you certain?**

**Sha, Leksa. - Yes, Lexa.**

**Kei. Chit laik yu op tu? - Okay. What are you up to?**

**Eintheing. - Nothing.**

**Yu laik spichen? - Are you lying?**

**Nowe. - No.**

**Yu don gyon au hou? - Did you go home?**

**Beja, Klark. - Please, Clarke.**

**Jos nou hod op. - Just don’t stop.**

**Sha. - Yes.**

**Heda, chil au. - Commander, calm down.**

**Onya, ai laik ku. - Anya, I am fine.**

**Kei. Jos laik kefa. - Okay. Just be careful.**

**Sha, sis. - Yes, sister.**

**Mochof, strisis. - Thank you, little sister.**

**Pro. - You’re welcome.**

**Wanheda’s gadagapa liak ain, Klark. - The Commander of Death’s pussy is mine, Clarke. (According to Trigedasleng.info, gadagapa means vagina….but I did not deem that a dirty enough word for this scene.)**

**Beja, Leksa. - Please, Lexa.**

**Jok. - Fuck.**

**Beja, Leksa. Jok ai. - Please, Lexa. Fuck me.**

**Ai gaf in yu ge kom op, Klark. - I want you to come, Clarke.**

 

 

 

 


	17. Barista's Choice---One year anniversary one-shot---

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little (28,000) diddle to celebrate this story being around for a whole year. This is in the B.C. world, but it is set in a different time frame. It in no way follows what I am doing in the story now and it may not happen later. But it's hella fluffy and cute....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I decided to write something special for the one year anniversary of this little ditty of mine. This is set in the Barista’s Choice world, but it is still separate from the story itself. I just don’t want to confuse anybody because this is going to be completely out of the timeline that I have planned out for the end of this story.
> 
> So, I hope that you guys enjoy this little one shot. Thank you for your patience with me and I'm super sorry for the wait.
> 
> Shout out to Randomme103 for being a rockstar. She's super patient with my crazy ass and she reads all of this before I post it. So, she's the real hero here.
> 
> Feel free to yell at me on here in the comments, or on my tumblr. Jeffrinamichelle.tumblr.com

**~Barista's Choice: Valentine’s Day~**

 

Valentine’s Day had never been a holiday that Lexa was overtly fond of. It felt too commercial to her, even though it wasn’t a commercial holiday. The whole ‘show your loved one how much they mean to you’ was not something that she had ever understood. Celebrate your love for your significant other one day out of three hundred and sixty five days? No thanks. Why can’t you do that every day?

Costia had been a big believer in celebrating and so Lexa had been forced to go over the top for her girlfriend.

Clarke had the same feelings as Lexa when it came to celebrating. She actually preferred to celebrate her love for Lexa on days that were not observed as national holidays. She would send flowers to Lexa’s office at least once a week. ‘Just because you’re you,’ is what the card would always read, in Clarke’s loopy scrawl. Even now, three years after marrying Clarke, her wife managed to make her feel like they were in college again. Niylah would always make fun of Lexa when she’d see the giant bouquet of whatever flower Clarke chose that week sitting on Lexa’s desk, because the brunette would always turn beet red.

It was really strange to work with one of her wife’s exes, but she and Niylah had actually become close friends over the years. They were hired by the same law firm straight out of college. Niylah ended up marrying the girl that Clarke had introduced her to back in her junior year, before she started dating Lexa.

Even though she wasn’t keen on celebrating such a commercial holiday, this year Clarke gave her the best gift ever.

**~*~*One Week Ago*~*~**

Clarke had been moody. Moodier than normal. For the past month, she’s been working on her new exhibition for her gallery so she has been busy. Most of her time at home, she has been holed up in her studio, trying to get her pieces put together.

Lexa didn’t mind that Clarke was busy with work, she loved that her wife was passionate about her art. And she had a very demanding job too, so it wouldn’t be fair for her to be mad about Clarke being busy.

No matter how busy they were, they both made it a point to have supper together every night. They had yet to miss an evening together since they’d been married.

So, for the life of her, Lexa cannot figure out why Clarke is not home right now. She had sent her wife a text about an hour before she got off of work, asking what she wanted for dinner. Clarke replied immediately, letting Lexa know that she was craving pad Thai like nobody’s business.

Lexa made sure to bring home Clarke’s pork pad Thai from their favorite Thai restaurant, barely remembering to order the shrimp spring rolls that Clarke always wanted but never asked for.

She hears Fish bark as she slips her key into the lock. She’s pretty sure that her lazy dog is barking at her from her and Clarke’s bed. Her tiny, baby Husky is not so little anymore. At five years old, Fish is a sixty pound beast.

Her suspicions are confirmed when she walks into the house. She can hear Fish’s bark emanating from their bedroom, but he makes no effort in moving to check out what is going on in the house.

_“You’re a terrible guard dog, Fish. What if I was a thief?”_

At the sound of Lexa’s voice, Fish hops off of the bed, padding into the living room. His tail wags as he sees Lexa standing in the doorway, take out bags in one hand and her briefcase in the other. Fish comes up to her and sniffs at the take out, nudging her hand with his snout.

_“Yeah right. Keep dreaming dude. Even if I did feed you people food, you were a terrible guard dog tonight.”_

When Lexa doesn’t cave after another nudge to her hand, Fish changes his tactics. He rubs his face and body against Lexa’s leg, getting his long fur all over her black slacks. Lexa jumps back with a gasp, her back hitting the front door.

_“Fish! Come on! You know that it’s damn near impossible to get your fur out of my slacks. Go lay down, you butthead.”_

Fish whines, staring intently at the food. With a glare in his direction, the stubborn Husky takes his leave, heading back into the master bedroom.

Lexa chuckles at her goofy dog, heading towards the kitchen so that she can set the food down.

After setting her things down on the kitchen counter, Lexa pulls her cell phone out of her pocket so that she can call Clarke. The call goes straight to voicemail, which doesn’t surprise Lexa at all. Clarke is notorious for forgetting her cell phone in the gallery. When she actually remembers to carry it on her person, it is usually dead because she frequently forgets to charge it.

Lexa leaves a voice message for Clarke, inquiring about her wife’s whereabouts, just in case she forgot about dinner. Lexa has to laugh out loud about that, because Clarke would never forget about their dinner plans, especially when Thai food is involved. With a resigned sigh, she sets the device on the counter, deciding to jump into the shower before heading over to the gallery. She puts the bags of food into the oven, hoping that it will keep warm while she is gone.

She heads into the master bedroom, shedding her tailored suit as she makes her way into the bathroom. She knows that she is going to have a horrible time trying to get Fish’s fur off of her slacks, so she sets them aside so that she can get them dry cleaned. She would rather pay somebody else to deal with that devil dog’s fur.

She showers quickly, even though she would rather take her time. She usually takes a longer shower when she gets home from work, but she’s worried about her wife. It’s totally unheard of for Clarke to be late for dinner, even if she is running a little late. After toweling off, she gets dressed in a pair of black yoga pants and a white tank top. When she comes out of the steam filled bathroom, Fish is standing next to the door with his tail wagging expectantly. Lexa chuckles softly, scratching between the husky’s ears.

_“Fine. I guess that you can ride with me to pick up your mama. But, you’d better not get drool all over my windows again!”_

The drive to the gallery is usually a ten minute commute, but the rush hour traffic in LA delays Lexa another ten minutes.

Clarke’s sky blue Volkswagen Jetta is parked outside of the small red brick building. Other than a small glare of light coming from the back of the gallery, the rest of the building is dark. She heads inside of the gallery with Fish hot on her heels.

The front door is locked, but Lexa has a spare key on her key ring. She unlocks the front door and walks in, relocking the door behind her. Fish immediately begins his search for his mama, snout in the air as he sniffs her out. Lexa follows dutifully behind her dog, worry settling in her bones.

 _“Clarke?”_ Lexa calls out as they enter the blonde’s office.

The light in the room is dim, shadows cast all over the walls. Clarke’s stuff is all over her desk, her purse dumped out on the wooden surface. Her cell phone is on top of the pile. Lexa picks up the device and presses the home button. The phone is dead, just as she suspected. She knows that Clarke has a charger in her office, why she doesn’t use is completely lost on Lexa. One of these days, she’s going to convince her wife to be more diligent about having her phone on her and charged.

She turns around to call Fish, but the words die in her throat. Fish has managed to push open the bathroom door in Clarke’s office. He is sitting on the ground next to the toilet, his face resting against Clarke’s slumped over body.

Lexa moves quickly, fear putting her body on autopilot. She kneels down next to her wife, placing a hand on her shoulder.

_“Clarke. Baby.”_

Clarke’s body tenses as she startles awake. Her blue eyes frantically move around the room, trying to figure out where she is. When she meets Lexa’s concerned gaze, a sleepy smile graces her lips.

 _“Hey, Lexie.”_ Clarke rasps out, her voice rough with sleep.

_“Hey sweetheart. You fell asleep in the bathroom.”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Not that this is the weirdest place I’ve ever found you sleeping in, but why were you in here on the floor?”_

_“Oh, I um, I wasn’t feeling very good. I came in here and got sick. I guess that I fell asleep after I threw up.”_

_“You got sick baby?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Did you eat something weird that made you feel icky?”_

_“No. I had that protein shake that you made me this morning. And for lunch O brought me a sandwich from that deli that you like.”_

_“Hmm. Have you felt sick any other day recently?”_

_“No. I was thinking that it was from stress, since I only have a few more days to get this show together before it opens.”_

_“Yeah, probably.”_ Lexa places an open palm on Clarke’s forehead. _“You don’t have a fever, so that’s good.”_

_“Yeah, did I miss dinner?”_

_“No baby. I left it in the oven at home so that it would keep warm._ ”

_“Okay, good. Can we go home?”_

_“Of course. I even got those spring rolls that you love.”_

_“Have I mentioned that I love you?”_

Lexa chuckles, pressing her lips to the side of Clarke’s head. _“I love you too ai houmon. Do you want to ride home with me? I can bring you to work in the morning.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Alright baby, let’s get out of here.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

The next three days end up being hectic for both Clarke and Lexa. Clarke works pretty much from sunup to sundown in the gallery, getting the last of her exhibition set up. She recruits Octavia to help her, bribing her with promise of babysitting her godson soon so that she and Lincoln can have a date night. It’s pretty much a copout, because babysitting Ricky isn’t really a job for her. He is her favorite little man, after all, so it isn’t really a fair trade. She still calls him baby Ricky, even though he is a little over four years old now. Clarke still sees him as a newborn, wrapped in the lion blanket that she brought to the hospital for him. Ricky is her little monster and she loves him to death. But, lately, being around him is making her uterus desperate for her own baby.

Last year, she and Lexa had sat down to talk about starting their own family. It was something that they both wanted, and they were ready to take that step in their lives.

It didn’t take long for them to actually decide to start trying for a baby. Clarke wanted to carry the baby, which was totally fine with Lexa. She was still unsure if she wanted to carry, but she told Clarke that she would think about it. Clarke was fine with that and they started to research their options right away.

Both women decided that they didn’t want to use an anonymous donor. They didn’t have many men in their lives, so their options were kind of limited.

After talking about it, they decided that they were going to ask Lincoln. The only other guy that was up for consideration was Bellamy, but he lived in Germany with his wife, Echo. Plus, Clarke felt like it would have been kind of like incest if they were to ask him. Which made no sense to Lexa, because he wasn’t blood related to Clarke. Her wife argued that she had known him for so long that he might as well be her actual brother. Lexa just had to roll her eyes and agree with her wife, because there is no way that she would’ve won that fight.

In the end, Lincoln and Octavia were happy to help Clarke and Lexa try to conceive. He joked with them, asking if they were going to do it the old fashioned way. Lexa and Octavia punched him in either arm while Clarke laughed so hard that she almost passed out. It was nice to know that their friends were so willing to help them out.

During her senior year of college, Clarke decided to try and mend her relationship with her mom. She was tired of their strained relationship. It took some effort, but eventually she managed to work things out with Abby.

Abby was no longer disapproving of her relationship with Lexa. In fact, both Abby and Marcus were head over heels in love with the brunette. Marcus even gave Clarke away when the two got married.

Naturally, when Clarke and Lexa decided to start working on their family, they asked Abby for help. She wasn’t a fertility specialist by any means, but she had connections in the medical world. She helped the girls get set up with the best fertility specialist on the west coast.

It was a long and grueling process that only gave the girls a thirty three percent chance of conceiving, but they decided to go with IVF. Clarke asked Lexa if she would be willing to use her eggs because she really liked the idea of carrying Lexa’s baby. Lexa would deny it to her dying day, but she was so touched by Clarke’s request that she cried in the doctor’s office.

They started their first round of IVF treatments two months later.

Clarke tried not to be excited about it. She knew that most IVF treatments were unsuccessful, especially on the first try. She couldn’t help but hope that it would take, because she was so, so ready for a baby.

Even though she was telling herself not to be excited about the prospect of getting pregnant, she really couldn’t help it. She had a feeling that Lexa was excited too, even though she remained impassive during the normal six week wait.

So, needless to say, when the first round was unsuccessful, both women were devastated. They hid their disappointment behind smiles and laughs that were halfhearted and sometimes forced.

Clarke wanted to try again right away, but Lexa was hesitant. She didn’t tell Clarke, but she was so hopeful that the treatment would take on the first try. The idea of her wife carrying her child was exhilarating. She hadn’t been so anxious about something since she married Clarke. So, when the test result and the blood test were both negative, she was absolutely crushed.

She wanted to try again, sure, but she was afraid. She didn’t think that her heart could take it if the treatment failed a second time. Plus, Clarke had been in the beginning stages of planning a new exhibition for her gallery. Lexa knew how much time these shows took to plan and put together and she knew that they were incredibly stressful for her wife. She definitely didn’t need the added stress of thinking about being pregnant on top of that.

It took some time but in the end, she caved to Clarke’s wishes. They went through their second round of IVF six months after being let down the first time.

The second time was just as nerve wracking as the first. Lexa was sure that this time was going to take. There was no reason why it shouldn’t work. Clarke was young and healthy and all of her tests showed that she was very fertile. The first week went by with both women on edge, hoping that the treatment would take early. The influx of hormones in Clarke’s body from the injections that Lexa had been injecting her with were making Clarke extremely irritable. Lexa had come home many times during the three weeks before the treatment to find her wife crying while watching whatever was on Animal Planet at the time. Lexa had lost count of how many ASPCA infomercials she had walked in on, but it was incredibly depressing.

At the end of the first week, Lexa’s boss came to her with a huge case. She was teaming up with Niylah to work on a huge murder case. It was going to take up a lot of her time, so she was glad that Clarke had her gallery to worry about. As anxious as they were about the IVF treatment taking, life seemed to want to get in their way.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**~Clarke’s POV~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“O?”_ Clarke calls across the gallery as she comes out of the bathroom, wiping her hands on her paint stained jeans.

 _“What’s up, Princess?”_ Octavia replies as she walks into Clarke’s office, Ricky following closely behind.

 _“Kark!”_ Ricky wobbles on his unsteady toddler legs as he runs into his godmother’s arms.

_“Hey buddy! How’s my favorite guy?”_

Ricky nuzzles into Clarke’s body as she picks him up. She laughs as he presses a wet, slobbery kiss against her cheek.

_“Good.”_

_“Good, I’m glad baby.”_

_“So, are you ready for this show, Clarke?”_

_“I think so. I’m so freaking nervous, O. What if it doesn’t go over well? What if I don’t sell anything? And then I’m not going to have any money and Lexa and I will lose our house…”_

_“Clarke, what the hell are you talking about? You and Lexa are fine financially. I mean, yeah it would suck if you don’t sell anything, but has that ever happened at one of your shows?”_

_“No..”_

_“Exactly. So you need to stop freaking out. Because you are kind of pale right now. Like you might throw up.”_

_“Oh, I already did.”_

_“Did you really?”_

_“Yeah. I don’t know. This show is really nerve wracking.”_

_“I know, but it’s going to be amazing.”_

_“I hope so.”_

_“It is and you know it. Hold on a second, I gotta pee.”_

Octavia walks into the small bathroom, not even bothering to shut the door behind her. Clarke busies herself with planting kisses on her godson’s cheeks while her best friend is in the bathroom.

_“Hey, Clarke?”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“Do you have any lady products?”_

_“Seriously. You are twenty five years old and you still don’t like saying the word tampon?”_

_“Shut up. Lincoln and I have been together for almost ten years and he still calls tampons ‘lady plugs.’”_

_“Gross. That is the worst description for a tampon that I have ever heard in my life.”_

_“Yeah, I know. It’s great when we’re in the store and he asks me what lady plug brand I use.”_

_“Oh, man. I love your husband. He’s absolutely ridiculous.”_

_“Yeah, he’s definitely something. So, do you have a lady plug?”_

_“Um, I do not.”_

_“Really?_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Okay, that’s weird.”_

_“Why?”_

Octavia walks out of the bathroom, regarding her best friend questioningly.

_“Because our cycles have been close since we started our periods. You get yours, and as you’re finishing up for the month, mine starts. Since my uterus is currently wreaking havoc on my body, you should’ve just finished. So, you should have lady products in your bathroom.”_

_“Yeah, well maybe it’s late.”_

_“When was the last time your period was late?”_

_“Um, never.”_

_“Exactly.”_

_“But I’ve been under a lot of stress with this exhibition.”_

_“This isn’t your first rodeo, Clarke.”_

_“I know.”_

_“Do you think that maybe….?”_

_“Don’t say it.”_ Clarke cradles her now sleeping godson to her chest, rocking him slightly. _“I don’t want to get my hopes up.”_

_“Okay, fine. I won’t say it. But I’m going to hope that it’s what I think it is.”_

_“I’m okay with that.”_

_“Good. Now I’m going to run to the store so that I can pick up some lady plugs. Do you mind if he stays here with you?”_

_“No, of course not.”_

_“Cool. I’ll be back in a flash. Should I pick up a pee stick for you?”_

_“No! I told you not to talk about it.”_

_“Okay, okay.”_ Octavia holds her hands up in surrender, backing away from her best friend slowly. _“Sorry, grumpy pants.”_

**~*~*~*~*~**

If there was one thing about Octavia that was infuriating, it was the fact that she doesn’t listen. So, of course she brought back a few different packs of pregnancy tests. Clarke would’ve been angry at her best friend, but she fell asleep on the couch in her office while O was gone, with Ricky curled up in a ball on her chest. Octavia let her best friend sleep because she knew that Clarke had been working long hours for the past few weeks.

When Clarke woke up, it was because Octavia was pulling Ricky off of her body.

_“Hey buddy, I know that you probably want to stay here and sleep on Auntie Clarke all day, but it’s time to go. Daddy will be home soon.”_

_“No, mama.”_

_“Yes baby. We will come see Auntie Clarke tomorrow.”_

_“Okay. We go see daddy.”_

_“Oh no, are you leaving me?”_ Clarke husks as she stretches out her body on the couch. She groans as her joints pop from sleeping on the couch.

_“Sorry, babe, Lincoln is getting off early today so we gotta run. We’ll come by tomorrow.”_

_“Fine. Just take away the love of my life.”_

_“Annie Kark!”_ Ricky pulls away from Octavia’s arms so that he can reach out for Clarke. Clarke pushes off the couch, grabbing her godson and hoisting him into her arms. She presses kisses all over his face, making him laugh uncontrollably. _“I wve you.”_

_“I love you too. I’ll see you tomorrow. If you want, I can bring Fish with me so you can play with him.”_

_“Oooohhhh Fish! Yes, pwease.”_

_“You got it, Rick-rick.”_

_“YAYYYY!”_

_“Okay, back to mama, little dude.”_

_“Okay.”_

Clarke sets Ricky down after on last sloppy kiss to his cheek. He laughs loudly while wiping his cheek, walking back over to Octavia.

 _“Oh hey, before I forget, I left you something in your purse.”_ Octavia calls out as she walks out of Clarke’s office.

_“What is it?”_

_“Love you, bye!”_

_“Octavia!!!”_

Clarke hears Octavia laugh as she walks out of the gallery without another word. She grumbles as she walks over to her desk, where a plastic bag is sitting inside of her purse. She grabs the bag and opens it, huffing in disbelief when she glances inside. Of course Octavia pick up a pack of pregnancy tests because of Clarke being late. That is what happened when she found out that she was pregnant with Ricky. But, Clarke has already been disappointed once. She’s not going to set herself up for disappointment again. At least right now. What she is going to do is call Octavia and yell at her, because she is a jackass. Grabbing her cell phone out of the never-ending abyss that is her purse, she unlocks the device and pulls up Octavia contact info. Knowing that her best friend is driving, she opts to call her instead. Octavia answers on the second ring.

_“Hello?”_

_“Really, dude?”_

_“What?”_

_“Pregnancy tests?”_

_“Surely I don’t have any idea what you’re talking about.”_

_“I’m so going to kick your ass.”_

_“Language. You are on my Bluetooth. Ricky doesn’t need to walk into the house and scream ass at the top of his lungs. Dammit, Clarke!”_

_“That’s what you get for buying those tests. I hope that he walks in and yells the ‘a word’ in front of Lincoln.”_

_“He’d know that it was your fault.”_

_“Ugh, you’re right.”_

_“But seriously, you should do one.”_

_“O.”_ Clarke sighs into the phone, plopping down into her desk chair. _“I’m scared.”_

_“I know babe, but it might be what you want.”_

_“But what if it’s not? I don’t know if I can handle another let down.”_

_“I don’t know Clarke, something feels different this time. Call it mother’s intuition.”_

_“Octavia, you’re not my mother.”_

_“No, but I’m a mother. Same diff.”_

_“I don’t think that’s how it works.”_

_“Shush. That is exactly how it works.”_

_“Whatever you say.”_

_“So, I have an idea about you taking a test.”_

_“I’m listening.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

**~General POV~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke had never really been much of a cook. She could make a mean mac and cheese and her ramen skills were unrivaled, but other than that, she was the queen of take out.

Ever since she and Lexa got married, her skills in the kitchen had grown exponentially. Lexa wasn’t one to eat take out very often, so Clarke spent countless hours reading through cookbooks and watching an embarrassing amount of food network. All so that she could impress her wife with her newly found passion.

Now that she is standing in front of this rack of lamb, she is regretting her decision.

Octavia’s idea involved a romantic dinner for Lexa, followed by her gifting Lexa with an unused test for them to take. Clarke loved the idea, but she was seriously freaking out.

She had watched at least ten videos on preparing racks of lamb on youtube, and she still felt on edge. It probably wasn’t just because she was cooking something that she had never made before.

The tests had been on her mind since Octavia had purchased them for her four days ago. She felt as if they were burning a hole in her purse. She wanted to take one right after she got off of the phone with her best friend, but she was so scared. Maybe taking one with Lexa around would help, especially if they didn’t get the result that they wanted.

Lexa had sent her a text saying that she would be home in about forty minutes, which gave Clarke just enough time to get everything ready.

By the time she hears the tumblers of the front door unlock, she has just pulled the lamb out of the oven to rest. Fish jumps off of the couch, padding over to the front door. He meets Lexa with an excited wag of his tail and a soft bark. Clarke eyes her wife as she walks into the house with her briefcase in hand. As long as they’ve been together, the sight of Lexa in a fitted suit is something that Clarke will never get used to. It definitely sends warm feelings coursing through her body, and it makes her want to forget about dinner so that she can take Lexa into the bedroom instead. Or the couch, of floor, or wall. She’s really not very picky about where she makes love to her wife.

The surge of nerves in her belly remind her that she wasn’t doing this clichéd Valentine’s Day dinner for just any reason. So, as much as she would rather cavewoman drag Lexa into their bedroom for the remainder of the night, she can’t.

She’s so lost in her thoughts that she doesn’t hear Lexa walk up beside her. The soft kiss that Lexa presses to her cheek makes her jump, bringing her back into the present.

 _“Hey baby.”_ Lexa whispers against the side of Clarke’s face, eliciting a shiver from the blonde.

_“Hey you. How was work?”_

_“It was good. I missed you. How was your day?”_

_“I missed you too. My day was good. I hung out with O and Ricky for most of it. Rick-rick and I ended up taking a nap on my couch for a bit.”_

_“Sounds like fun. I bet that he loved that. You’re his favorite nap partner.”_

_“It’s because I have big boobs, they make good pillows.”_

_“Okay, he’s four. I don’t think that is the reason why.”_

_“You’d be surprised.”_

_“He is Octavia’s child, after all.”_

_“True. So, I made you dinner.”_

_“Oh yeah? What is on the menu for tonight?”_

_“I roasted a rack of lamb.”_

_“Wait, what?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“I thought that we didn’t do Valentine’s Day.”_

_“Yeah, we don’t.”_

_“So, we are celebrating this year?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Is there a reason why?”_

_“It’s possible.”_

_“Oh yeah?”_ Clarke nods, gaze dropping to her feet, refusing to meet Lexa’s eyes. _“Care to share?”_

_“After dinner.”_

_“Okay. In that case, let me go change, and then we can eat.”_

_“Sounds like a plan.”_

_“Okay. Back in a jiff.”_ Lexa pecks Clarke on the lips before walking out of the kitchen towards their room. Clarke only ogles her wife’s ass a little. Okay, maybe a lot, but her wife has a great ass. She’s not ashamed of perving on it a little.

While Lexa’s in the room changing, Clarke cuts the lamb and finishes up the side dishes. She’s just putting all of the food on the table when Lexa comes out of the bedroom dressed down in a pair of black skinny jeans and Clarke’s old red Stanford hoodie. Her hair is out of its bun, wavy brunette locks flowing well past her shoulders.

_“Everything is ready if you’re hungry, Lexie.”_

_“Good. I’m starving.”_

Lexa sits down at the table with a sigh, the stress of the day finally lifting off of her shoulders. She loves the case that she is working on, really she does, but she is just ready for a vacation. Maybe she’ll talk to Nia after they win to see if she can take some time off. Clarke sets a wine glass down in front of Lexa before taking her seat with her own glass in hand.

Lexa serves them both before digging into her meal with gusto. So, maybe she forgot to eat lunch. It wasn’t on purpose, she was just really busy. This case has pretty much taken up all of her and Niylah’s free time. So, she would be lying if she said that this was the first time that she was too busy to eat while at work. Not that she will ever tell Clarke that. Because she knows that her wife would kick her ass for not taking care of herself.

_“Hungry, babe?”_

_“Maybe a little.”_ Lexa says between bites of the roasted red potatoes that Clarke paired with the lamb. She lets out a moan of approval, because really, they are freaking delicious.

 _“Did you eat lunch?”_ Clarke questions, her eyebrows raised in Lexa’s direction.

_“Yes.”_

_“Lex.”_

_“What?”_

_“Did you eat lunch today?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Don’t lie to me, Mrs. Woods.”_

_“Okay, maybe I didn’t have time.”_ Lexa replies sheepishly, her eyes dropping down to the table in shame.

_“That is unacceptable, Lexa. You have to eat.”_

_“I know, I know. I’m sorry Clarke. I didn’t do it on purpose, I swear.”_

_“Fine.”_ Clarke relents as she takes another bite of her lamb. She’s not going to lie, her dinner turned out perfectly. She was super worried that she would screw the lamb up, but she nailed it. Thanks to the ten videos that she watched on youtube. _“I need you to make sure that you’re taking care of yourself.”_

_“I know, baby. I really am sorry.”_

_“It’s fine. Well, it’s not fine but you’re forgiven. Now eat up, because I got you a present.”_

_“Seriously? You’re really going all out for a holiday that you can’t stand.”_

_“Well, it’s different this year.”_

_“Why?”_

_“You’ll see. Now stop yapping and eat woman.”_

_“Okay, okay. Jeez. Bossy much?”_

Lexa digs back into her food, finishing up her potatoes quickly. She stops when she finished the starchy goodness, grabbing her wine glass to take a drink. She takes a long drink of the cold liquid, her face crunching up in confusion as she swallows grape juice?

_“Um, babe?”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“Grape juice. Really?”_

_“What?”_

_“I mean doesn’t red wine go with lamb? Not grape juice.”_

_“Oh shit, sorry. That’s my glass.”_

_“Okay. Why are you drinking grape juice?”_

_“Um.”_ Clarke rubs nervously rubs at the back of her neck. _“I just didn’t want any wine.”_

_“Seriously?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“But you love red wine.”_

_“I know. I just wanted some grape juice.”_

_“I’m confused, Clarke. Because you don’t even like grape juice.”_

_“I do now.”_

_“Since when?”_

_“Since tonight.”_

_“Okay, seriously, you’re being so weird. What’s going on?”_ Lexa looks up at Clarke questioningly. _“Is everything okay?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Don’t lie to me, Clarke.”_

_“Just…”_ Clarke stops to take a breath. She really wants to chug the glass of wine that is in front of her, but she really shouldn’t. So instead she stands up abruptly, moving into the living room. Fish is sprawled out on the couch, snoozing away. He is so out of it that he doesn’t even wake up when Clarke sits down on the couch with a huff.

After a few minutes of silence, Lexa follows her wife into the living room. She sits on the arm of the couch nearest to Clarke, concern lacing her features.

 _“Babe, what’s going on?”_ She prods, resting her head against Clarke’s.

_“Just grab the box on the table.”_

_“What is it?”_

_“It’s your Valentine’s Day present.”_

Lexa reaches over so that she can grab the gift off of the table. It’s a small, neatly wrapped box. Lexa’s face falls as she realizes that she doesn’t have anything to give in return. _“Oh. Baby, I didn’t know that we were exchanging gifts this year. I didn’t get you anything.”_

_“It’s fine. I don’t need anything.”_

_“But, I feel bad.”_

_“Don’t. This is more of a gift for both of us.”_

_“What is it?”_

_“Just, open it.”_

Lexa looks at Clarke in confusion as she breaks the tape on the neatly wrapped box. Clarke just smiles softly at her as she neatly opens the present.

When the gift is open, she breaks her staring contest with her wife so that she can look down at her gift.

Okay, somebody seriously needs to pinch her, because Lexa is definitely dreaming. Because there is only one reason why Clarke would give her a box of pregnancy tests for Valentine’s Day. Her wide green eyes snap up to meet Clarke’s stormy blue’s.

 _“Are you?”_ Lexa croaks, voice overcome with emotion.

_“I don’t know. I think so. But I’m not sure yet.”_

_“But, there’s a chance?”_ Lexa sounds so childlike, her voice filled with hope and wonder. It makes Clarke’s heart ache in the best way possible.

_“A pretty good one, yeah.”_

_“How do you know?”_

_“Well, according to O, she has mother’s intuition about it. Because my period is late and I’ve been getting sick a bit this week.”_

_“But you haven’t taken a test yet?”_

_“No. I couldn’t.”_

_“Why not?”_

_“I was scared of it being negative.”_

_“Can we go take one now?”_

_“If you want to, yes.”_

_“Yes, please.”_

Lexa hops off the arm of the couch, pulling Clarke to her feet in the process. She all but drags her wife out of the dining room, making a beeline for the bathroom. Lexa immediately rips open the package and hands Clarke one of the tests, her body almost shaking with nervous energy.

 _“Baby, please calm down. You’re making me nervous.”_ Clarke says quietly as she opens the test.

_“Sorry. I’m trying not to get my hopes up, but I can’t help it.”_

_“I know, Lex. Just promise me that if this isn’t the result that we want, we won’t stop trying, okay?”_

The look of vulnerability on Clarke’s face breaks Lexa’s heart. She leans in so that she can kiss her wife sweetly, trying to reassure Clarke. She pulls away when she feels wetness on her cheeks.

_“Baby, I wouldn’t dream of it. I want nothing more than to start a family with you. No matter how many times we have to try. If you want to have me stab you in the thigh with hormones for the next ten years, I will.”_

Clarke chuckles as Lexa wipes the tears off of her cheeks. _“That is the most romantic thing that you’ve ever said to me.”_

 _“I try.”_ Lexa leans in to kiss Clarke again. _“Do you want me to leave while you take the test?”_

_“No way. Nothing you haven’t seen before, woman.”_

_“Okay, so,”_ Lexa hops up on the bathroom counter as Clarke settles herself on the toilet. She busies herself with small talk as she does her business. She sets the test on the lip of the bathtub after she finishes, washing her hands before sitting down on the now closed toilet. _“How excited are you for this exhibition?”_

_“I’m so excited. I just hope that it goes well.”_

_“It will. I’m sure of it. You know that your work is amazing, babe.”_

_“It’s alright.”_

_“Shut up, Clarke. You’re amazing and you know it.”_

_“You have to say that, you’re my wife.”_

_“Stop being a turd, Clarke.”_

_“Fine, but I still think that the exhibition work is just okay.”_

_“Okay, we are going to stop talking about this now, because I don’t want to have to kick your butt.”_

_“How is your case going?”_

_“Good I think. The trial starts next week but I think that we have a solid case built up. So, I think that it will go in our favor.”_

_“Good, that’s good. How’s Niylah doing?”_

_“She’s doing well. She actually wanted to see if we wanted to get together for dinner sometime next week.”_

_“That would be awesome. It’s been a while since we’ve gone over to her and Ontari’s place.”_

_“Yeah. I already told her that we could plan it for the end of the week, because I figured that you’d say yes.”_

_“Yeah, that’s fine. Whenever you want to, babe.”_

_“So, has it been three minutes yet?”_

_“I dunno. Probably.”_

_“Well, are you going to look?”_

_“No, probably not.”_

_“Clarke. No matter what that test says, it’s going to be alright. I promise.”_

_“You do it.”_

_“What?”_

_“You look at it. I can’t be the first to know.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Yes.”_

Lexa hops off of the counter, walking the short distance to the tub. She takes a deep breath in an attempt to settle her nerves. If she’s nervous, she can’t imagine how nervous Clarke is.

Clarke took the last test really hard. She was really upset and blamed herself for the negative result. No matter how many times Lexa told her that she had nothing to do with the treatment not taking, the blonde was still completely devastated. Lexa was upset, but she knew that they would have another chance at having a baby, so she didn’t let it destroy her.

So, she is hella nervous right now, but she is hopeful. If only she could open her eyes and look at the test.

_“Lex?”_

_“Hmm?”_

_“Did you look?”_

_“Not yet?”_

_“Well? What are you waiting for?”_

_“Shush.”_

Lexa opens her eyes, holding the test up so that she can read it.

The result is clear as day.

PREGNANT.

Oh god. It’s really happening.

Clarke’s pregnant. The treatment took. She’s going to be a mom. Clarke is going to be a mom. They’re going to be parents.

Who is sobbing? This is happy news.

Lexa is so wrapped up in the sheer excitement of the result that it takes her a few minutes to realize that she is, in fact, crying. She’s the one that is sobbing. She can’t even bring herself to care, because she’s going to have a baby.

_“Lexa?”_

_“Hmm?”_

_“Oh, my god, it’s negative, isn’t it? Fuck. I knew that it was just stress. Goddammit O. She just had to go and buy these fucking tests. It was better not knowing. Why? Why is this happ…”_

_“Clarke.”_

_“What am I going to tell mom? She’s going to be so sad.”_

_“Clarke.”_

_“And what about Mama Woods? She’s going to be sad too. Leave it to us to fail at making a baby when we don’t have any siblings. Our moms are never going to be grandmas.”_

_“KLARK!”_

_“WHAT, LEXA!”_

_“It’s not negative.”_

_“Wait, what?”_

Lexa flips the test over so that the display is facing Clarke. Clarke’s eyes zero in on the screen, widening when they read the result. Clarke gasps softly, her hand coming up to cover her mouth in shock. Her eyes begin to fill with tears as the news settles in.

_“It’s…”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“We are going to be…”_

_“Yup.”_

_“Oh, my god, Lexie. We’re preggers.”_

_“Yeah, we are.”_

_“We’re going to have a baby.”_

Clarke laughs, the tail end of it turning into a sob as she cries freely. This is exactly what they’ve been waiting for and she is so, so happy that life has turned in their favor.

Lexa drops to her knees in front of the toilet, reaching out so that she can wrap her arms around Clarke’s waist. She presses her body against Clarke’s, sobbing against her wife’s chest. Clarke’s hands come to rest in Lexa’s hair, smoothing down her unruly curls.

 _“Are you okay, baby?”_ Clarke questions, pressing her lips against the crown of Lexa’s head.

_“I’m fine, perfect even. I am so happy. I love you so much, Clarke.”_

_“I love you too baby. I can’t believe that we’re going to have a baby.”_

_“I know. Now, I think that you should take both of the other tests in that box, just to be sure. In the morning we will call Dr. Thompson to set up an appointment so we can make it official.”_

_“Whatever you say, Heda.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

**~Two Months Later~**

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Clarke, baby. Do you want to reschedule this dinner?”_ Lexa questions softly as she walks into the bathroom, her wife sprawled out on the bathroom floor.

 _“Ugh, no Lex.”_ Clarke groans out as she feels another wave of nausea roll through her body.

_“But you’ve been throwing up all day. We can do this some other time. It’s so not a big deal.”_

_“What?! It’s not a big deal?”_ Clarke sits upright as quickly as her body will allow, glaring in the direction of her wife. Lexa’s eyes widen in surprise, her hands splaying out in surrender. _“We’re telling our family and friends that we are having a child. How is that not a big deal, Alexandria Woods?”_

_“Oh no, shit, that is so not what I meant. That part is totally a big deal. But if you are not feeling up hosting dinner for everybody, we can do it another night.”_

_“We don’t have time, Lexa. I’m almost three months pregnant. I’m going to be as big as a house pretty soon. Plus, this morning sickness is an all day adventure right now, so there isn’t really going to be an ideal time.”_

_“Okay, if you’re sure.”_

_“I’m sure. Even if you think it isn’t a big deal.”_

Lexa sighs, running her fingers through her hair in exasperation. _“That is not what I meant, and you know it.”_

_“I know. I’m sorry. It’s just these hormones are making me feel crazy.”_

_“I know, baby. It’s completely understandable. Remember how crazy Octavia got when she was pregnant with Ricky?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“I felt so bad for Lincoln. Octavia was always yelling at him.”_

_“Wait, you felt bad for Lincoln?”_

_“Well, yeah. I mean Octavia was yelling at him for everything. Like when he made her a sandwich and he put cheese on it. And she told him that she hated cheese even though had a grilled cheese the day before.”_

_“You do realize that having melted cheese on a sandwich is different than having a slice of cheese on a turkey sandwich.”_

_“Yes? What’s your point?”_

_“Nothing.”_ Clarke shrugs, her voice dangerously calm. _“It’s just weird that you would feel bad for Lincoln.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“Well, he is the reason why she was being irrational in the first place.”_

Lexa narrows her eyes in confusion. She should know better than to argue with Clarke right now. Her wife has been overly emotional lately, sometimes picking fights for no reason. This was something that she knew was common with pregnant women, but it was kind of making her head spin. So, like an idiot, she pushes her wife when she’s already worked up. _“How so?”_

Wrong question apparently. Clarke’s brow furrows, fire igniting behind her blue eyes.

_“What do you mean, how so?”_

_“Well, as far as I know, Octavia was part of their dalliance as well. So therefore, the blame should be placed on both of them.”_

_“No.”_

_“No?”_

_“It’s Lincoln’s fault.”_

_“How is it solely Lincoln’s fault?”_

_“Because I said so, Lexa. That is the only reason that matters. Just like it’s your fault that I’m being irrational now.”_

_“You being pregnant is my fault?”_

_“YES!!!”_

_“That doesn’t make any sense, Clarke. We both made an informed decision to make a baby. So, tell me, how our mutual decision to get pregnant equates to me being completely at fault for your irrational thoughts?”_

_“Get the hell out of here.”_

_“What?”_

_“Get out of the bathroom, Lexa.”_

_“What? Why?”_

_“Because I don’t want to look at you right now.”_

_“That’s childish, Clarke.”_

_“Get OUT!!!”_

Lexa scrambles out of the bathroom, closing the door behind her. She leans against the frame, taking a deep breath to calm herself. She knows that Clarke is simply lashing out and she isn’t really mad at her, but she’s still being irrational. How Lincoln dealt with a pregnant Octavia for nine months and stayed sane, Lexa will never understand. She can hear Clarke moving on the other side of the door, and she thinks that maybe Clarke will be over their little tiff. The clank of the toilet lid being opened and the sound of Clarke retching tells her something different.

Lexa hates that Clarke is having such a rough time with morning sickness right now, but she has taken it all in stride. For the most part, she’s been in good spirits, even if she keeps picking fights with Lexa.

Sighing in defeat, she walks back towards the kitchen. Her wife is adamant about having their dinner party, even though she doesn’t feel good. So, that means that she has about two hours to come up with an awesome meal before their family and friends get here.

It has been pretty difficult to coordinate a get together with everybody with all of their hectic work schedules. Somehow, with minimal stress, Lexa has managed to wrangle the whole group together. Lexa’s mom flew in late last night and Clarke’s mom and stepdad drove in this morning. Anya and Raven have been lifesavers, heading off the parents to keep them busy until dinner. They didn’t even ask any questions when Lexa asked them for the favor, but she knows that they will ask her for something, eventually.

In the end, she ends up making a stuffed chicken breast with some roasted red potatoes and fresh green beans. Clarke emerges from the bedroom just as she is setting the table that she had to go buy just for this ten person dinner. She’s dressed in a pair of leggings and a loose t-shirt. Normally, Clarke would wear a tighter fitting shirt, but she’s starting to show. The baby bump is still slight, but it is definitely there. Lexa hates that Clarke has to hide the glorious baby bump that is her growing child, but she understands why it is necessary. After tonight, however, Clarke will be able to show off their pride and joy.

Clarke’s hair is wet from the shower, piled in a messy bun on top of her head. Lexa smiles softly as she meets her wife’s eyes, relief filling her body as Clarke smiles back. Clarke comes up behind Lexa, wrapping her arms around the brunette’s waist. She presses a soft kiss against the back of Lexa’s neck, reveling in the small moan that falls from Lexa’s lips.

_“Are you feeling better, baby?”_

_“Mmmhmmm. I’m sorry that I was mean to you.”_

_“It’s okay my love.”_

_“No, it’s not. I was being a turd.”_

_“I know, but you’re growing a life inside of you. You’re allowed to be a turd sometimes.”_

_“I know, but I’m still sorry.”_

_“I’m not mad at you, promise.”_

_“Okay.”_ Clarke presses another kiss against Lexa’s neck. _“It smells really good in here.”_

_“Thanks. Everything is just about done. I’m just waiting for everybody to get here. Are you ready for this?”_

_“As ready as I’ll ever be, I suppose. Are you ready?”_

Lexa turns in Clarke’s arms so that she can face her wife. She places a soft kiss on Clarke’s lips, pulling away before Clarke can deepen it.

_“Ready to tell everybody, no. Ready to be a parent? Yes, one thousand percent.”_

Lexa brings her hands to rest on Clarke’s stomach, running her fingers across the slight bump. She smiles and leans in to kiss Clarke again, letting her wife deepen the kiss this time. It isn’t long before Clarke starts to get a little handsy, trying to up the intensity of their make out session.

One of the pregnancy books that Lexa read told her that her significant other would show a marked increase in sexual arousal. At the time, Lexa scoffed at that statement, because there was no way that Clarke could be more insatiable than she already was. Boy, was she WRONG. She almost can’t keep up with Clarke’s super libido, and that’s saying a lot. They were fairly active in their sex life, but not like they have been recently. But, Lexa is totally not complaining. They just don’t have time right now.

Pulling away from the kiss with a groan, Lexa rests her forehead against Clarke’s. Clarke’s lips are kiss swollen and her eyes have taken on a much darker hue. She is slightly breathless, warm puffs of air washing over Lexa’s face.

_“Babe, as much as I love you, we so don’t have time to get worked up right now.”_

_“Ugh, but baby. I want you so much.”_

_“I know Clarke. I wish that we had time, but you know that everybody is going to be here soon. So, I don’t want to start something that we don’t have time to finish.”_

_“Fine but you owe me like five orgasms later.”_

_“Whatever you want, my love.”_

Lexa chuckles, leaning in to kiss the pout off of Clarke’s lips. The sounds of the doorbell pulls them out of their reverie, Clarke groaning in frustration. Her lust clouded mind was so sure that Lexa was close to breaking. And, she was horny, dammit. Guests be damned. Lexa moves out of her arms to answer the door, and Clarke is pretty sure that she lets out a growl of frustration.

_“Babe.”_

_“What?”_

_“Why are you growling?”_

_“Why do you think?”_

_“Clarke. I told you that I would make it up to you later. I promise.”_

_“Fine.”_

_“God, I love you. You are so ridiculous.”_

_“It’s you and your child’s fault.”_

Lexa laughs, shaking her head as she pulls open the front door. A small blur buzzes past her, straight into Clarke’s arms. Lincoln and Octavia walk in behind their eager son, hugging Lexa in greeting as they enter the house. The smirk that Octavia gives Clarke before she hugs her best friend lets Clarke know that Octavia knows why they’re here. Not that Clarke and Lexa haven’t held dinners at their house before, but they haven’t gathered everybody up since they got married.

 _“How’re you feeling, babe?”_ Octavia asks as she hugs Clarke tightly, maneuvering around her son’s small body that is now attached to Clarke’s legs.

_“Good, I’m good.”_

_“That’s good. Everything okay?”_

_“Yeah, of course.”_

_“Okay. Where’s Mama G and Marcus?”_

_“With Rae and Anya.”_

_“Oh, that sounds dangerous.”_

_“Yeah. They should be here soon.”_

_“Are you ready for this?”_

_“As ready as I can be. It can’t go any worse than yours did.”_

_“I should hope not. We’ll see I suppose. I bet that you would like a drink right now.”_

_“Like you wouldn’t believe.”_

_“Oh, trust me, I know how you feel. I’ve been through this before, remember? At least yours was planned.”_

_“Annie Kark!”_ Ricky yells from the floor, where he has completely wrapped his body around Clarke’s left leg. Clarke and Octavia look down at the boy, laughing at his big toothy grin. _“Hi!”_

_“Hi my love. How are you?”_

_“Good. Where Annie Lex?”_

_“You ran past her to get to me. She’s probably in the living room with your dad.”_

_“ANNIE LEX!”_

Lexa peeks her head into the kitchen. Ricky’s eyes widen in surprise as he lets out a squeal. He drops himself completely to the floor, letting go of Clarke’s leg. Lexa steps into the kitchen and drops to her knees just as Ricky runs towards her. He barrels into her, attempting to wrap his tiny arms around her body. Lexa falls to the floor dramatically as she catches Ricky, both laughing as they fall.

_“Oh, my gosh, you are getting so strong buddy.”_

_“I know. I go to work with daddy.”_

_“Oh yeah?”_

_“Yeah!”_

_“Do you work out with him?”_

_“Yup.”_

_“I can tell. You’re going to be stronger than him in no time.”_

Watching Lexa with her godson makes her heart swell. She can’t wait for their baby to get here, even though they’re only a third of the way through her pregnancy. She knows that Lexa is going to be a great mom, and she’s so excited to experience that with her.

Her daydream is broken when she hears Raven’s raucous laughter outside of the front door. Lincoln meets them at the door just as Raven knocks. Anxiety and nerves hit her full force as the rest of their family walks into the house.

Lexa and Ricky have moved their wrestling match to the living room, leaving Clarke and Octavia alone in the kitchen. Octavia grabs Clarke’s hand and squeezes it reassuringly.

_“It’s going to be fine.”_

_“I hope that you’re right.”_

_“Call it mother’s intuition.”_

_“Shut up, O.”_

_“Love you, boo. Now girl up because here comes your mom. Hey Abby!”_

Girl up, indeed.

**~*~*~*~*~***

It takes another fifteen minutes to get greetings out of the way so that they can sit down and eat. Lexa grabs the dishes while Clarke grabs drinks for everybody else. The boys insist on beer, while the girls opt for wine. She makes Ricky a glass of chocolate milk and grabs a water for herself before sitting down at the table next to Lexa.

They eat in silence, only breaking it to compliment Lexa on her meal. Clarke is thankful that nobody notices that she isn’t drinking. Or, if they have, they have chosen to not mention it. She manages to make it through the meal without any nausea, which is uncommon as of late. Abby and Lily kick everybody out of the dining room so that they can do the clean-up.

The group settles into the living room, putting a hockey game on the television, much to Marcus’s dismay. Lily and Abby come into the living room twenty minutes later, carrying plates of cupcakes. Even with her eyes closed as she cuddles into Lexa’s side on their sectional, Clarke’s hypersensitive nose picks up the sweet smell of baked goods. Her mouth starts to water, in a good way this time.

 _“Are those from Babycakes?”_ Clarke directs towards Abby without opening her eyes.

 _“What the hell is a baby cake?”_ Raven questions as she sits on the floor, playing with Ricky.

_“It’s a bakery back home that Clarke was obsessed with before she moved out here for college. And to answer your question, yes they are Clarke.”_

_“Oh god, yesssss. I need like five of those in my mouth, now. Lex, baby?”_

_“Yes, my love?”_

_“If you feed me those cupcakes, I will love you forever.”_

_“I’m pretty sure that you already signed up for that when you agreed to marry me, baby.”_

_“Ugh. But, I can’t feed myself.”_

_“Why is that? You did just fine while you were eating supper.”_

_“Because I’m tired now.”_

_“Why are you tired, Clarke? Are you not getting enough sleep? Adequate sleep is crucial to staying healthy.”_ Abby questions her daughter as she walks towards their end of the couch. She hands Lexa two cupcakes, leaning over so that she can place her hand on Clarke’s forehead. Clarke grunts and reluctantly opens her eyes so that she can look at Abby.

_“Mom, stop. I’ve been sleeping just fine for the most part. I just had a long day.”_

_“Did you work today?”_

_“No, I just couldn’t sleep last night because I had to make sure the house was clean for you guys.”_

_“I’m sure that the house wasn’t too bad. You aren’t very good at cleaning up after yourself, but Lexa does a good job of keeping you in line.”_

_“Shush. Be a good mom and give me a cupcake.”_

_“I gave your favorite one to your wife. Ask her for it.”_

_“Lexie…”_

Clarke lifts her head up so that she can meet Lexa’s eyes. She juts out her bottom lip in a pout. Lexa sighs, setting her cupcake on the armrest of the couch. She unwraps half of Clarke’s cupcake, holding it up to her wife’s mouth. Clarke smiles and takes a huge bite of the heavenly cake, moaning at the taste. It’s been almost eight years since she’s had a cupcake from back home and it is just as good as she remembers.

_“You are such a brat, ai hodnes.”_

_“Ai hod yu in, Leksa.”_

_“Yeah, yeah. Can you feed yourself now?”_

_“Maybe.”_

_“Okay, you guys are disgusting. Clarke, quit being a princess and feed yourself so that Lexa can eat. Lexa, quit enabling Clarke’s prissiness. You guys are lucky that these cupcakes are bomb otherwise I would throw one at your faces.”_

_“Real nice, Raven.”_

_“Well, it’s true. These cupcakes are bomb. And you two are super gross. It couldn’t get any gayer in here.”_

_“You’re engaged to a woman, ass.”_

_“Eh, semantics. You guys are still really gay.”_

_“Fuck off, Rae.”_

_“Clarke! Language! There are innocent ears present.”_ Lexa chides, tilting her head so that she can whisper in Clarke’s ear. _“Baby Woods doesn’t need to learn such foul language.”_

_“Hey! No whispering over there, Woods clan.”_

_“Should we tell them now?”_ Clarke whispers back to Lexa, totally ignoring Raven.

_“Yes.”_

_“Okay. Do you want to tell them….”_

_“Oi! Stop whispering, or I will throw this cupcake.”_

_“No you won’t, Rae.”_

Raven holds up the half-eaten cupcake in warning. _“Test me, Princess. Whisper in Lexa’s ear one more time and see what happens.”_

 _“Alright, alright. You win.”_ Clarke sits up, holding her hands up in surrender. She glares at Raven as the brunette finishes her cupcake, a smirk plastered on her face. _“You’re a jerk.”_

_“I love you too, Princess.”_

_“So…”_ Clarke takes a deep breath, attempting to settle the nerves that have taken residence in her belly. Lexa feels her wife’s unease so she sits up and wraps an arm around her waist. She kisses Clarke’s cheek, whispering reassurances in her ear. _“I bet you are all wondering why we gathered you all together.”_

_“What kind of speech is this? Are you guys getting divorced?”_

_“Shut up, Rae! Let me talk.”_

_“Sorry. Carry on.”_

All of the eyes in the room zero in towards Clarke, giving her their undivided attention. The nerves are starting to make her feel a little bit sick and she feels like her heart is going to pound right out of her chest. Okay, maybe it’s not just the nerves that are making her feel sick.

_“Shit.”_

_“Language.”_

Clarke attempts to roll her eyes at Raven, but her face resembles more of a grimace as she fights back a gag. Dammit, this is so not how she wanted this to go. And she definitely does not want to throw up her first Babycakes cupcake in the better part of a decade. Unfortunately for Clarke, Lexa’s child is stubborn and is going to make her throw up. Right now. She gets to her feet quickly, making a dash for the bathroom. She might have kicked Raven a little bit on her way out of the living room, but it was totally an accident. Maybe. Because she’d be a really crappy friend if she kicked her best friend on purpose. Okay, so it wasn’t an accident, but Raven doesn’t know that.

She’s getting tired of praying to the porcelain god. Sure, it was fun in high school and college after a night of drinking, but this is so not the same. This baby is wreaking havoc on Clarke’s insides and she still has six months to go.

Luckily, this bout of evening sickness doesn’t last very long. After brushing her teeth and washing her face, she’s ready to face the music. She slowly walks back into the living room, too nervous to notice that everybody is watching her as she retakes her seat next to Lexa. She grabs one of Lexa’s hands with her own, intertwining their fingers and taking a deep breath.

_“Sorry about that, everybody.”_

_“Are you sure that you’re alright, Clarke?”_ Abby questions, her worried gaze falling on her daughter.

_“Yeah, I’m fine, promise.”_

_“It’s kind of hard to believe that when you’re running off to the restroom to vomit while in the middle of a conversation.”_

_“Well, that’s what Lexa and I wanted to get you guys together to talk about.”_

_“Are you…”_ Abby starts but is immediately cut off by Clarke.

_“So, if everybody will just let me talk, you’ll know what’s going on.”_

_“Sorry.”_

_“It’s fine mom. Just let me get this out, okay?”_

_“Okay.”_

Clarke feels Lexa’s hand grip her chin, turning the blonde’s face towards hers. She smiles reassuringly at her wife, leaning in to kiss her softly. The gentle kiss helps abate the nerves fluttering around in Clarke’s stomach. She turns her attention back to the group with a newfound confidence coursing through her body.

_“Alright everybody. First off, Lexa and I want to thank all of you for taking time out of your busy lives to gather here with us today. It really means a lot to us. Especially our parents, who had to travel to get out here. So, we have some news and no we’re not getting divorced, Raven.”_

_“I was totally kidding, Princess.”_

_“I know, I’m just giving you crap. Anyway, as all of you know, Lexa and I have recently decided to expand our family. The first go around, our attempt to get pregnant was unsuccessful. We started another round of IVF but life got in the way and we both kind of forgot about it.”_

_“Are you?”_ Lily’s soft voice breaks out from across the room. Clarke meets her mother in law’s green eyes, so full of hope, and all she can do is nod as her own eyes fill with tears. Damn hormones.

 _“Seriously?”_ Abby’s voice is loud and commanding, as always, but husky with emotion.

_“Yeah. We are definitely pregnant.”_

_“How far along?”_

_“Almost three months, according to the doctor.”_

_“Oh my god, yesssss!”_ Raven squeals, getting to her feet as fast as she can. She makes her way over to Clarke with her arm out, engulfing her best friend in a hug. _“This is so freaking exciting. I will finally get to be a godparent.”_

 _“Whoa now, Reyes. Who says that you get to be godparent to baby Woods?”_ Octavia exclaims, pointing accusingly at the brunette.

_“Well, it’s just makes sense. You made Clarke and Lexa Ricky’s godmothers. So, Anya and I would be the obvious choice for baby Woods godparents.”_

_“Why is that obvious?”_

_“Because, you and Linc will be godparents when Anya and I decide to have Raven Junior.”_

_“Wait a second, I never agreed to naming our future child Raven Junior.”_

_“Please babe, we both know that Raven Junior is the perfect name for our hypothetical child.”_

_“Whatever.”_

_“So, it makes sense, right O?”_

_“I mean, I guess.”_ Octavia shrugs, snatching a cupcake off of the living room table.

_“Thought so. All I know is that I call title of goddaddy.”_

_“Is that even a thing?”_ Octavia questions, her words muffled by a mouth full of cupcake.

_“It is now. First off, before Abs starting dating Marcus, I was sure that I was going to be Clarke’s new daddy.”_

_“Ugh, Raven. That’s disgusting. Please don’t talk about my mom while she’s in the room.”_

_“I’m just saying. Abs and I had something special, but good ole Marky Marc stole her heart from me. I was crushed for a long time. And then I met my soulmate. That beautiful lady over there. Now she calls me ‘daddy.’ So, I should be the goddaddy. It just makes sense.”_

_“Raven, I am not letting my child call you daddy. Ever.”_

Raven looks over at Lexa to respond. When she sees the look on Lexa’s face, all she can muster up is a laugh. Lexa looks so disgusted right now. Like the word daddy has left a horrible taste in her mouth.

_“Fine. I’ll just continue to let your best friend call me daddy.”_

_“I do not call you that.”_

_“You don’t have to be embarrassed babe. It’s awesome.”_

_“No, Rae, it’s really not. It’s kind of weird. Also, do you think that you get the hell off of me? You’re crushing my bladder.”_

_“Right, sorry Princess. Is there anymore wine left? I think that a congratulatory drink is in order.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Six Weeks Later**

**~*~*~*~*~***

If there was one thing that Clarke was not prepared for when it came to being pregnant, it would definitely be the fact that she was perpetually horny.

Clarke knew that she had a very energetic sexual appetite. She hadn’t always been so thirsty. Sure, she enjoyed sex, but it was different with Lexa. Sometimes she felt like an addict, completely insatiable and desperate for her next fix.

Now that she was pregnant, her needs were almost out of control. It didn’t matter how many times she cornered Lexa in the doorway as she entered the house, fucking her senseless against the wall. She was almost crazy with her need for Lexa.

 _“How did you do it, O?”_ Clarke asks one day as she hangs out with Octavia while they watch Ricky play at a park. Clarke’s baby bump is more prominent now, as she enters her eighteenth week of pregnancy. She likes to show it off, wearing tight shirts that show off the swell of her belly.

_“What do you mean?”_

_“How did you survive your pregnancy with Ricky?”_

_“You’re going to have to be more specific, Griff.”_

_“Okay, that’s just rude. I don’t call you by your maiden name.”_

_“Chill, dude. I was joking.”_

_“I know. Sorry. These hormones make me crazy.”_

_“You’re preaching to the choir, Princess. I was an emotional wreck when I was pregnant.”_

_“Oh, trust me, I remember.”_

_“Ass. But seriously, what’s on your mind, Clarke?”_

_“I dunno. Maybe it was different for you, but I feel like I’m losing my shit.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because…”_ Clarke lowers her voice so that none of the kids at the park can hear her. _“I’m like always horny.”_

_“How is that anything new? You and Lexa have been going at it like rabbits for years.”_

_“No this is totally different. Like, I can’t get enough of her. I mean, I feel like it’s getting excessive.”_

_“More excessive than that time that you guys had that big fight? The one that caused you guys to have a week long sex marathon in Raven and Anya’s apartment.”_

_“This is way worse. Like I would be okay with being in bed constantly. I mean, as soon as she gets home, I attack her at the door. Most of the time I end up fucking her against the wall, or on the living room floor. It’s gotten to the point where she’s coming home from work super late, in hopes that I’ll be asleep.”_

_“Are you sure that is why she’s coming home late? Isn’t she working on a pretty big murder case with Niylah?”_

_“Well yeah, but that isn’t the point. She’s been working on this case for months now and she used to come home on time.”_

_“Okay, but aren’t they getting ready for the actual trial?”_

_“Stop being so rational!”_

_“Jeez, woman. Chill. I’m just saying. She’s probably really busy trying to get everything ready so they can convict this douchebag. I doubt your insatiable hunger for your wife’s body is the reason for her late work nights.”_

_“God, I hate you. Why do you have to be right?”_

_“Because I’m amazing. Plus, I’ve been through this before. I was super horny when I was pregnant too.”_

_“What did you do about it?”_

_“Are you sure that you want to know?”_

_“Yes. I need to know because I’m going crazy here.”_

_“Well, first off I need to tell you that you are lucky.”_

_“What? Why?”_

_“Because you are married to a woman.”_

_“Um, okay. I’m not sure that makes any sense. Octavia “Straight as an arrow” Triyon, being jealous that I’m married to a woman.”_

_“Okay, so there is a reason for my jealousy. There is a physical limit to how many times a man can please a woman sexually in one night. There is a point in time where a guy has to stop and rest. Now, I’ve never been with a woman, but from what you and Raven have told me, they have great stamina.”_

_“Are you telling me that Lincoln doesn’t have good stamina?”_

_“No. I’m not saying that at all. But, from what I’ve heard from you and Raven. And from what I’ve actually heard, being in the wrong place at the wrong time, y’all can go forever. Like energizer bunnies or some shit. I know that you’ve been batting for the home team for a long while now, but you’ve played for the away team too. You know what I’m talking about.”_

_“I haven’t played for the away team in years, I’m not sure I remember.”_

_“Liar.”_

_“No, I’m serious. Plus, the last guy that was anywhere near my home plate was Finn. So, not really the greatest person to use as a comparison.”_

_“Seriously?”_

_“What?”_

_“Finn was the last guy that you slept with?”_

_“YUP.”_

_“Jeez. That was such a long time ago.”_

_“Freshman year of college.”_

_“Wow. I was sure that it hadn’t been that long since you’d switched teams.”_

_“I didn’t switch teams. I’ve always been bisexual. I just prefer women.”_

_“I know. I didn’t mean it that way.”_

_“I know. I’m just giving you shit. Now, do you have any ideas on how I can drive Lexa crazy for staying late at work?”_

_“I think that I have the perfect idea.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Do you think that we have enough evidence to win this trial?”_ Niylah questions between bites of her sesame chicken.

 _“Please. You know that we have this case locked down. We’ve been working nonstop for the past three months. I’m pretty sure that our wives don’t even remember what we look like anymore.”_ Lexa replies as she hops up on Niylah’s desk, swiping the container of sesame chicken out of her hands.

_“Hey! That container is mine, you jerk!”_

_“Please woman. You ate like half of my broccoli chicken.”_

_“Okay, fine. You’re right. But do you really have to put your ass on my desk?”_

_“My ass is the best looking thing that’s ever been on your desk.”_ The look on Niylah’s face tells Lexa that her statement isn’t true. _“Gross. I didn’t need to know that.”_

_“I didn’t say anything.”_

_“You didn’t have to. We’ve been working together for so long, I know what your facial expressions mean. The one that you have on your face right now tells me that you’ve most definitely had sex on this surface.”_

_“Like you haven’t had sex on yours.”_

_“You know, I don’t think that I have. Now Clarke on the other hand, has been on my desk many times.”_

_“Okay…”_

_“Usually she’s bent over it. There’s just something about me wearing a suit that does it for her.”_

_“Lexa. That is just way too much information.”_

_“Oops.”_ Lexa shrugs as she takes a bite of Niylah’s sesame chicken. The glint of mischief in her green eyes makes Niylah laugh.

_“We’ve gotten way off course here.”_

_“I know. But can you blame us? We’re way overworked. We’ve been here since five a.m. and it’s almost eight p.m.”_

_“Yeah. I’m surprised that Ontari and Clarke haven’t driven down here to force us to come home.”_

_“They probably ran off and found new wives by now. Or, maybe they ran off together.”_

_“Oh well. As long as Clarke has somebody to take care of her and the baby.”_

_“Oh yes, the baby. Are you excited yet?”_

_“I’ve been excited.”_

_“I know, but she’s halfway through her pregnancy. Another four and a half months to go and you’ll have a newborn keeping you up at all hours of the night. Throwing up on your work clothes five minutes before you have to leave for work. Plus, you’ll have a sleep deprived, cranky wife that blames you for the nuisance that keeps her up all night.”_

_“Gosh, you make parenthood sound so appealing.”_

_“Oh, it’s the bee’s knees. I wouldn’t trade having a kid for anything in the world. The only difference is, my child is almost four so she doesn’t keep us up all night. Therefore, my wife doesn’t curse my existence. Clarke on the other hand, is going to hate you for at least three years.”_

_“I doubt that will actually happen.”_

_“Yeah, sure. Doubt the person that’s been through this already. Good idea.”_

_“Clarke and I’s relationship is strong. She’ll never hate me once our baby gets here.”_

_“She’s not actually going to hate you, Lexa. Just because she’s going to vacate that fetus in four and a half months doesn’t mean that she’s going to get rid of all of those crazy hormones. Those things will keep her crazy for a long time after the baby is born. Then she’ll get irrational because of the sleep deprivation. Pretty soon, it’s been three years and she’ll actually like being around you again.”_

_“I feel like you are exaggerating a little bit.”_

_“Oh, you’ll see. Can we wrap this crap up for tonight? I want to go home to my girls.”_

_“Let’s go through it one more time and then we can pack up for the night. Promise.”_

_“Fine. But give me back my chicken. And get the hell off of my desk.”_

_“Whiner.”_

Lexa reluctantly hands back the container of chicken. Niylah sticks her tongue out in triumph, getting a middle finger for her gloating. The two women continue to bicker as the go over the case files for the millionth time. They complain about being tired and overworked, but they are both perfectionists and they both want this case to be ironclad. So, they work through their fatigue and msg fog, despite their earlier complaints.

Ten minutes into the work, Lexa’s text notification goes off. She ignores it at first, keeping her attention on the task at hand. A second notification distracts her again and this time she can’t ignore it. It might be Clarke, and despite the fact that they’ve had a very normal pregnancy, she can’t help but worry.

_“Just take a second and look at your phone, Lexa. It’s probably Clarke.”_

Lexa grabs her phone off of Niylah’s desk with a sigh. The text messages are in fact, from Clarke.

**_Baby Mama: Just got done hanging out with O and Ricky. Baby Woods is missing Mama Woods…maybe I am too, but just a little bit. Are you coming home soon?_ **

**_Baby Mama: Also, ran out of hot sauce. I need some more for that caramel popcorn. Can you bring some home?_ **

**_Mama Woods: Yes, my love. I will bring you home some hot sauce. I probably won’t be home for another two or so hours._ **

**_Baby Mama: Ugh, babe, really? You’ve been working late for soooo long. I don’t even remember what your face looks like._ **

**_Mama Woods: Really, Clarke? Isn’t that a little dramatic?_ **

**_Baby Mama: No *pouty face*_ **

Lexa rolls her eyes at her wife’s text. She can see Clarke at home, actually pouting at her phone. She opens the camera and takes a selfie of her making a kissy face. She attaches the picture to her reply.

**_Mama Woods: Hopefully I still look as good as you remember._ **

Lexa doesn’t get a reply right away so she puts her phone back on the desk. She turns her attention back to the case. She really does want to get home soon and she’s sure that Niylah feels the same way. Unfortunately for her, Clarke is very persistent when she is bored. Ten minutes pass before she gets a response, and she is definitely not prepared for it.

 She is fully immersed in the case file as she grabs her phone to open the message. Her first glance at the text is distracted, half assed, so she doesn’t immediately notice the pictures below the message. After scanning through the rest of the file, Lexa turns her full attention to her phone.

**_Baby Mama: You always look good to me. Too good. It’s not fair really. Leaving your poor pregnant wife home alone. While you’re at work, in that suit that you know I like. Ugh._ **

**_~Picture Attachment~_ **

**_~Picture Attachment~_ **

**_~Picture Attachment~_ **

Lexa tries to cover up the squeak that leaves her mouth as the picture loads, but judging by the way that Niylah’s head snaps up, she is unsuccessful.

_“You alright there?”_

_“Yup, totally.”_ Lexa manages, unable to take her eyes off of her phone screen.

_“You sure, Lexa?”_

The pictures that Clarke sent to her have rendered her speechless. She can hear Niylah talking to her, but all she can focus on is the images in front of her.

The first picture is of Clarke on their bed. Lexa can make out their headboard behind her wife’s head. Clarke’s blonde hair is splayed out on a pillow, seemingly glowing in the soft light of their room. Her normally bright blue eyes are a dark navy color, pupils blown with desire. The way that she is biting her bottom lip is absolutely sinful and it makes Lexa clench her thighs together to try and alleviate some of the pressure that she feels in her core.

She should know better than to open the next picture, really she should. Clarke isn’t shy about sending risqué photos to Lexa when she is working. Usually it isn’t a big deal, because Lexa is often alone in her office when Clarke is feeling frisky. But, of course, Lexa decides that one more picture can’t hurt.

Boy, was she wrong. If she thought that the first photograph was not safe for work, the second one makes it look like child’s play.

**_Baby Mama: You know what you being in a suit does to me._ **

The second photograph shows Clarke’s breath-taking body. She is lying in the middle of the bed, completely stripped of any clothing. Lexa can feel all of the moisture leave her mouth, travelling down south as she takes in the sight of her wife. She bites down on her cheek to suppress the groan that is fighting its way out of her mouth. Clarke’s free hand resting on her left breast, thumb and index finger pinching at the pert nipple.

Lexa has always been a boob girl. She would have to admit that her wife has always been very gifted in the chest department. Pregnancy has only made Clarke’s already substantial assets all the more bountiful and Lexa couldn’t be happier about it. Her more carnal instincts are joyous about the increase in Clarke’s cup size, although the change is for the survival of their unborn child. Until said child is brought into this world, those fluffy pillows belong to Lexa, dammit.

Looking at these pictures is pure torture for Lexa. She wants nothing more than to be at home, in bed with Clarke, not sleeping. She is sure that Niylah is still trying to get her attention, but she can’t focus on anything other than the sinful images of her wife.

She shouldn’t look at the last picture, of that much she is sure. She is already painfully turned on, while seated upon her co-worker’s desk, nonetheless. She should really put her phone down and focus on the rest of her work, she knows this. But, since Lexa is a glutton for punishment, she decides to open the picture. Because why not? What’s the worst that could happen?

Turns out that the worst thing that could happen was Lexa falling off of Niylah’s desk. She’s not even really sure how it happened. One second she’s perched on the desk, waiting for the third picture to load, the next second she’s groaning in pain as her tailbone hits the hard floor.

_“Lexa! What the hell? Are you okay?”_

Lexa is way too distracted to answer Niylah. Even as she sits unceremoniously on the floor of Niylah’s office, her eyes are trained on her phone.

**_Baby Mama: Since you aren’t here, I guess that I will have to take matters into my own hands._ **

The third picture is the most scandalous one by far. Lexa’s pretty sure that her eyes are bugging out of her head as she takes in the sight of her wife’s very bare bottom half.

_“Lexa? Are you okay?”_

_“Yeah. I have to go.”_

_“What? Is it Clarke? Is she okay?”_

_“It’s fine. Everything is fine. I just have to go, now.”_

Lexa gets to her feet quickly, taking her eyes off of her phone so that she can look at Niylah.

_“Okay.”_

_“Yeah. So, I’ll see you later. You should probably head home too.”_

_“Will do. I’ll see you Monday.”_

_“Yup. I’ll be here.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Lexa’s office is only fifteen minutes away from home, but she makes it there in seven. She’s pretty sure that she drove at least ten miles over the speed limit, maybe more. Her hands hurt from how hard she has been gripping the steering wheel, her mind flooded with very naughty images of Clarke.

It really wasn’t fair of Clarke to send Lexa such a provocative picture of herself. Especially knowing that Lexa was still at work. But, knowing her wife like she does, Clarke sent the picture with the intention of making Lexa come home.

She’d have to be crazy not to come home after such a picture. She could only handle so much teasing before breaking. Seeing her wife spread out on their bed with two fingers buried deep inside of herself was about all she could handle.

The house is mostly dark when she walks in, only the soft glow of the television lighting the living room. Fish is spread out on the couch, snoring loudly as he sleeps. Lexa chuckles at the sight, the giant husky’s legs sticking straight up in the air. Some random show on animal planet is playing on the television, the sound pretty much drowned out by Fish’s snores.

Of course Clarke would put animal planet on for their dog. Either that, or she was watching those damn ASPCA commercials again.

Lexa pulls her shoes off, leaving them by the front door. She unbuttons the top buttons of her green blouse as she makes her way towards the bedroom.

The door is cracked open and she can hear Clarke’s soft groans on the other side of the door. She feels a fresh rush of arousal course through her body as she makes her way into the bedroom.

Her attention is immediately drawn to her wife. Clarke is sprawled out in the middle of the bed, her eyes closed in concentration. Her bottom lip is caught between her teeth as her fingers glide through her soaked sex. Lexa watches on, mesmerized as Clarke circles her clit with her index finger.

Good God, her wife is going to be the death of her. Lexa wants nothing more than to join Clarke in their bed, but she is also really enjoying this whole watching thing. She quietly closes the bedroom door, so that Fish can’t come interrupt them. Clarke is too distracted by her current goal to get off to notice Lexa walking towards the bed, unbuttoning the rest of her shirt and pulling it off. She tosses the blouse behind her, unconcerned about where it lands. She pulls her slacks off next, kicking them off, leaving her in only her bra and panties. Her very ruined panties, thanks to the wanton vixen in front of her.

 _“Klark.”_ Her voice is husky, practically dripping with her arousal.

Clarke’s eyes flutter open at the sound of her wife’s voice. Clarke smiles wickedly at her wife as her fingers continue to rub at her bundle of nerves.

_“Lex. You’re home.”_

_“Of course I am. How could I not rush home after those pictures, you minx?”_ Lexa replies as she reaches behind her back to unclasp her bra. She slides the straps down her shoulders, hastily removing the offending undergarment. She peels the ruined panties off next, stepping out of them and leaving them on the floor.

_“I missed you, baby.”_

_“I missed you too, Clarke. You and baby Woods. Very much.”_

Lexa crawls onto the bed, carefully straddling her wife’s hips. Clarke’s hands immediately find purchase on Lexa’s hipbones, gripping them tightly so that she can grind their centers together. The moan that Lexa lets out is absolutely sinful and Clarke mirrors it when she feels just how wet her wife is.

_“Jesus, Lex. You’re soaked.”_

_“Can you blame me? You’ve been a very naughty tease this evening, my love.”_

_“I can’t help it. Your child is wreaking havoc on my body. Plus, my work obsessed wife wasn’t home to take care of me.”_

_“I’m sorry baby. This trial starts in two days and I can guarantee you that it will only take like a week before the jury convicts him.”_

_“I just miss you.”_

_“I know, Clarke. I’m sorry. After this trial, I’m going to try and thin out my case load so that I can spend more time at home with you.”_

_“Really?”_

_“Really. But we can talk about that later. First we need to address what I just walked in on.”_

_“I was just…”_

Lexa leans down, silencing Clarke with a kiss.

_“I know what you were doing.”_

Clarke’s face reddens, embarrassment flooding her cheeks. She drops her eyes from Lexa’s face, not comfortable with meeting her eyes anymore. Lexa grips her wife’s chin so that she can kiss her again.

_“Don’t be embarrassed, baby. It was hot.”_

_“Not really.”_

_“You didn’t see it from my point of view. In fact, you should keep going.”_

_“I should what?”_

_“You heard me.”_

_“I…no.”_

_“Come on Klark.”_ Lexa rolls her hips down into Clarke’s. _“I want to watch you.”_

_“Fine, but on one condition.”_

_“Anything.”_

_“I wanna watch you too.”_

_“Okay.”_

Lexa moves to get off of Clarke’s lap, settling on her side next to the blonde. She takes in the view of her wife, biting back a groan as her eyes roam over the expanse of skin. Clarke’s skin is flushed with arousal, her chest heaving with uneven breaths.

_“God, you are so fucking sexy, Clarke. Do you even realize what you do to me?”_

Instead of responding verbally, Clarke scoots closer to Lexa. She bites down on her bottom lip as her hand reaches out towards her wife. Her hand moves down Lexa’s stomach, fingertips tickling against her abs as she inches her way down. Lexa groans loudly when Clarke’s fingers meet her wet heat, teasing at the outer lips of her sex.

_“Baby.”_

_“Hmm?”_ Clarke replies as she continues her lazy exploration of her wife’s folds.

_“This isn’t what we talked about.”_

_“Don’t care. Wanna touch you.”_

Lexa moans softly as Clarke’s fingers circle around her clit. She lets herself get lost in the pleasure, for just a minute. As soon as she is able to control her basic motor functions, Lexa grabs Clarke’s wrist, effectively stopping her movements. Clarke lets out a whine of disappointment as she tries to continue her ministrations. Lexa clicks her tongue, making Clarke’s eyes snap up to meet hers.

_“Baby. As enjoyable as this is, we had an agreement.”_

_“But Lexa…”_

_“No buts. You know you want to.”_

_“Not as much as I want to touch you.”_

_“I know baby. As soon as you do what we talked about, I’ll let you touch me all you want.”_

_“Lex…”_

_“Klark.”_

Clarke pouts, her downturned lips making Lexa chuckle. She leans forward so that she can kiss the pout off of her wife’s lips.

_“You’re mean.”_

_“Consider this payback for sending me naughty pictures while I was working.”_

_“Fine.”_

Lexa uses her grip on Clarke’s wrist to move their hands. She guides Clarke’s hand over to her on body, placing it on top of her mound.

_“Just pretend that I’m the one touching you, Clarke.”_

_“Mmm. Or you could actually touch me.”_

_“Patience, my love.”_ Lexa scoots back slightly so that she can get a better view of her wife. She watches as Clarke questions herself for a minute before coming to a decision. She slides her fingers through her folds, letting out a gasp as she does so. _“Tell me Klark, how wet are you for me?”_ Lexa questions as she moves her hands over her own body.

_“Oh fuck, I’m so wet. And it’s all for you.”_

 Lexa’s eyes roam over Clarke’s body as she reaches the apex of her thighs. She groans loudly when her index finger brushes against her clit. She is so ridiculously turned on and sensitive right now that she knows it won’t take long for her to come. She most definitely wants to watch Clarke come undone before her peak hits, so she keeps her touch featherlight against her bundle of nerves.

 _“Clarke, baby.”_ Lexa breathes out softly.

_“Hmmm?”_

_“Look at me, beautiful.”_

Clarke looks over at Lexa, her normally blue eyes completely black from her arousal.

_“I want you to do more than just tease yourself. Go inside.”_

Lexa watches with rapt fascination as Clarke presses two fingers inside of her entrance. Lexa bites down on her lip as a needy mewl falls from Clarke’s mouth. Clarke’s back arches off of the bed slightly as she begins to thrust her fingers.

_“Fuck, Lexa. I’m not going to last very long.”_

_“That’s okay, I’m not either.”_

_“I wish that you were inside of me right now.”_ Clarke moans out as she begins to circle her clit with her thumb.

_“I am, and you feel so fucking good. So wet and tight around my fingers.”_

Clarke moans loudly at Lexa’s words. It’s not very often that Lexa swears, and when she does it turns Clarke on embarrassingly fast. She can feel her peak building quickly, and she so desperately wants Lexa to touch her.

_“Please…”_

_“Please what?”_

_“Please touch me. I want you so much.”_

_“I don’t know, Clarke. We had an agreement.”_

_“Come on baby. I’ve been a good girl. PLEASE.”_

Lexa sucks in a breath as Clarke says good girl. Those two words ignite a fire inside of her that quickly engulfs her entire being. She’s almost in a trance as she moves towards Clarke, shimmying down to rest between her wife’s legs. Clarke’s arousal is heady, thick in the air. It makes Lexa’s mouth water as she nears the source. Clarke’s thighs are wet and glistening with her arousal. Lexa can’t tear her eyes away from her wife’s sex. She’s completely entranced by the sight.

Clarke’s legs spread to better accommodate Lexa’s body, opening herself up even more to Lexa’s ogling.

 _“Have you been a GOOD GIRL, Clarke?”_ Lexa questions as she kisses her way up Clarke’s creamy thighs. She can taste Clarke’s arousal at the tops of her thighs and it makes her moan in approval.

_“Fuck…yes….Just please fuck me Lexa.”_

_“Two conditions.”_

_“Anything.”_

_“First condition is, that I want you to put your hands on the headboard. There will be no touching anything but the headboard. If you touch me or yourself, I stop until I deem that you have been punished long enough.”_

_“Okay. Easy enough. What’s the other condition?”_

_“The second condition is, I want you to let me fuck you.”_

_“Wait, I thought that was the whole point of me asking you to touch me.”_

_“No, Clarke. I want to FUCK YOU.”_

Clarke’s eyes widen as realization sets in. She can’t actually get her brain to function enough for her to form words, so she nods her head enthusiastically. There is nothing that she wants more than to have Lexa use the strap on that she has dubbed the Commander on her. Although, she has to admit that it is going to be really hard to keep her hands to herself while this is happening. And judging by the smirk on Lexa’s face, she knows this.

_“So, what are you waiting for, Heda? Get to it.”_

Lexa’s green eyes darken further at the challenge in Clarke’s voice. She leans her head down, placing love bites on the inside of Clarke’s thighs.

_“Please, Lex….holy shit!”_

Clarke’s words come to a halt as Lexa’s tongue runs through her folds. Lexa hums her approval as Clarke’s arousal coats her tongue. She repeats the motion before turning her attention to the hardened nub of Clarke’s clit. She flicks her tongue across the bundle of nerves a few times, reveling in the groans falling out of Clarke’s mouth. She pulls the nub into her mouth, lashing her tongue across it.

_“Jesus, fuck! Please keep going, baby. That feels so…fuck…so good.”_

Lexa can hear the change in Clarke’s breathing as she continues her ministrations. She knows that her wife won’t last much longer and that she needs to stop if she wants to be able to stay with her current plan. She reluctantly pulls her mouth away from her wife’s center, earning an unhappy groan from Clarke.

_“Hands on the headboard, Clarke.”_

Clarke complies immediately, both hands gripping the headboard tightly. Lexa crawls up her wife’s body, careful not to squish baby Woods. She knows that even having that thought is ridiculous, as the baby is cushioned deep within Clarke’s body. But, she’s irrationally afraid of doing something to hurt her unborn child. She presses her lips chastely against Clarke’s as soon as she is within reach, moving off the bed before her wife can deepen the kiss.

_“I’ll be right back. Don’t move your hands while I’m gone.”_

Clarke’s eyes follow Lexa’s body as she walks towards the bathroom. She stops at the dresser on her way, opening the top drawer to grab something that Clarke can’t see, before disappearing into the bathroom.

**~*~*~*~*~***

Clarke unclenches her hands so that she can take them off the headboard. She wills her racing heart to slow down, trying to regain some semblance of control of her body.

She is so painfully aroused that she is pretty sure that she’s going to come as soon as Lexa touches her. The ache between her legs is maddening and she isn’t sure how much longer she can wait.

Before she can make the decision to break her wife’s rule, she hears the bathroom door open. Lexa walks out clad in only her bathrobe, which is of course untied and open. The toy sits between Lexa’s legs, tantalizing and teasing Clarke in the best way possible.

There is something so inherently sexy about her wife when she wears the Commander. It’s almost like a role that she settles into and it drives Clarke completely wild. Clarke can do little more than just stare at her wife as she moves towards the bed, a powerful air surrounding her. She’s also pretty sure that she’s drooling, but fortunately for her, the room is dark enough to hide it.

_“Did you break my rule while I was gone?”_

Clarke tries to form words, really she does. But, the commanding tone to Lexa’s voice coupled with the sight of her is enough to render Clarke speechless. Clarke can only muster up enough mental strength to shake her head.

_“Are you sure that you were good while I was changing?”_

_“Yes, Commander.”_

_“So, why aren’t your hands where I told you to leave them?”_

_“Um…my hands got tired.”_

Lexa clicks her tongue in annoyance.

_“Clarke, are you lying to me?”_

_“No, Commander.”_

_“Then why won’t you look me in the eyes?”_

Clarke bites down on her bottom lip, looking at anything in the room that isn’t her wife. Lexa’s emerald eyes are locked on her face, one eyebrow quirked questioningly.

_“You were going to touch yourself, weren’t you?”_

Before Clarke can try and deny Lexa’s claim, she feels the bed dip as her wife crawls back onto it. Lexa’s hand grips her chin, gently forcing Clarke to meet her gaze.

_Don’t lie to me, Princess.”_

_“I’m sorry.”_

_“Clarke,”_ Lexa tuts, anger present in her voice. Clarke knows that Lexa is just playing a role right now, that she isn’t really angry at her. _“You haven’t been a good girl, now have you?”_

_“No. Forgive me, Heda.”_

_“Oh, it won’t be that easy to gain my forgiveness, Princess. You’ve been very, very bad. And you know what happens when you disobey me, don’t you?”_

_“But I didn’t touch myself.”_

_“No, you didn’t. But you’ve proven to me that you can’t keep your hands where I ask you to. So, it looks like I’m going to have to tie your hands to the headboard.”_

Lexa pulls open the drawer to her bedside table. Clarke watches her wife as she pulls out what looks like a scarf. Okay, make that three scarves. Lexa closes the drawer and turns back to her wife.

_“If at any time this gets to be too much and you want me to stop, just say so.”_

Clarke nods her head, unable to verbally answer her wife. Lexa lovingly grips her hands, tying the scarves to her wrists. She takes the other ends of the scarves and ties them to the bedposts. After ensuring that the knots are tight enough to keep Clarke in place but enough to hurt her, Lexa moves down the bed. She settles her body in-between Clarke’s legs, resting her weight on her knees.

_“What’s the third scarf for?”_

_“The third scarf is a blindfold for you, my dear.”_

_“What?”_

_“Yup.”_

Lexa reaches towards Clarke’s cheeks with her hands, gently caressing the soft skin. She presses her lips softly to Clarke’s as she slips the blindfold over her eyes.

Clarke feels her heartrate pick up as her vision is taken away from her. She feels a tiny prickle of fear at the idea of not being able to see, but at the same time, she’s pretty damn excited about what’s to come. Hopefully her, if Lexa is feeling so inclined to allow that.

_“Now that I’ve dealt with those pesky hands and taken away your sight, we can move on to part two of your punishment.”_

_“Part two?”_

_“Oh yes. You didn’t think that you were going to get off that easily, did you?”_

_“Well, I mean…”_

_“That question was rhetorical, Clarke.”_

Lexa runs her hands up Clarke’s legs, stroking the skin softly until she gets to the tops of her thighs. She rakes her nails across Clarke’s thighs, reddening the skin just slightly. Clarke hisses out in pleasure at the action. One of Lexa’s hands continues its journey upwards, while the other grips her thigh to guide it around her waist. Clarke wraps her other leg around Lexa’s waist, effectively trapping her wife between her legs.

Clarke can’t fight back the groan that falls from her mouth as Lexa’s hand moves between her legs. She’s embarrassingly wet, even more so since Lexa has basically restrained her. Lexa’s index finger moves teasingly at her entrance, without any intention of actually entering her. Clarke lifts her hips up to try and force Lexa’s finger inside of her, but Lexa’s other hand pinches her hip, stopping her. Not being able to see anything is just adding to her excitement, and she wants nothing more than to feel Lexa inside of her, fingers or the toy. She’s definitely not picky.

_“No, no. You don’t get to control anything right now, Clarke.”_

_“Lex, please.”_

_“No, Klark. Now, are you going to behave so that we can move on to the next punishment?”_

_“Sha, Heda.”_

_“Okay, good.”_

Clarke moans loudly as Lexa slides the toy through her folds, probably using her arousal to lubricate the silicone. It feels like a lifetime before she feels Lexa press the dildo at her entrance. Lexa enters her slowly, even though there is barely any resistance because of how wet she is. They both let out groans as Lexa bottoms out, burying the toy to the hilt inside of Clarke. Lexa makes no move to pull out, just enjoying the feeling of the other end of the toy being inside of her.

_“Is this part two of the punishment?”_

_“It’s the beginning of it, yes.”_

_“This isn’t a very good punishment. Unless you intend to just sit idly inside of me all night.”_

_“Clarke, now is not a good time for you to be sassy. Unless you want me to gag that pretty mouth of yours.”_

_“I’m sorry, Heda.”_

Instead of verbally answering her wife, Lexa pulls the toy almost all of the way out of Clarke before thrusting it back in. Clarke moans, lifting her hips up to meet Lexa’s next thrust. Lexa’s hands tighten around her hips, stopping her movements. Clarke lets out a groan of frustration at being completely at her wife’s mercy, even though she isn’t really upset about it.

_“Part two of your punishment, Clarke, is that you aren’t allowed to come.”_

_“Wait, what?”_ Clarke attempts to move her hands, momentarily forgetting that she is tied to the bedpost.

_“You heard me.”_

_“Like, at all?”_

_“Until I feel like you’ve earned it.”_

_“Lex….”_ Clarke huffs, clenching her thighs around Lexa’s hips.

_“Clarke. I already warned you once, so think twice before you get sassy.”_

Clarke bites down on her bottom lip to keep her mouth shut. As much as she wants to sass Lexa, she knows that her wife will make good on her threat. She kind of wants to push Lexa a little bit more, but she has tortured her poor wife enough for one night. So, instead, she decides to lay back and enjoy the ride, literally.

It seems like Lexa has other ideas, though. Because she is thrusting maddeningly slow into Clarke, pausing between each thrust. The thrusts have enough force behind them to be extremely enjoyable, but they aren’t going to send her over the edge anytime soon. Which is quickly pissing her off, because she is so painfully turned on that she wouldn’t need much more to come.

 _“You know how bad you were today, don’t you Clarke?”_ Lexa rasps, snapping her hips sharply into Clarke’s.

 _“Fuck!”_ Clarke moans out, thrashing her head side to side. _“I don’t know what I did that was so bad.”_

_“No?”_

_“No.”_

_“So, you’re telling me that it wasn’t bad of you to send me naughty pictures while I was working?”_

_“Maybe it was, a little bit. But you liked it, even if you won’t admit it.”_

_“You’ve very mouthy this evening, Clarke.”_

_“Well, I’d be less mouthy if somebody would properly fuck me.”_

The challenge in Clarke’s words seems to set Lexa loose. Her pace speeds up considerably, hips slapping against Clarke’s with each thrust. Clarke knows that the look on Lexa’s face right now would be one of determination and focus. She would attempt to look as stoic and unaffected as possible. But the soft groans that she can barely hear leaving Lexa’s mouth are enough to give her away. She’s enjoying the little game just as much, if not more than Clarke is.

The quickened pace and the deeper thrusts are bringing Clarke to the edge much faster than she expected. She just needs a few more rough thrusts from Lexa to send her over. Lexa is so in tuned with Clarke’s body that she must be able to feel her walls tightening in anticipation of her orgasm. So, of course she’s going to slow down. Or stop. Nope, even worse. She completely pulls out of Clarke, eliciting a very displeased sound from the blonde.

 _“Did you forget what I told you, Clarke?”_ Lexa is slightly breathless from exertion, her voice raspy and slightly deeper than normal.

 _“No, I didn’t.”_ Clarke fights to keep the attitude out of her voice. She knows that if she makes Lexa mad, she might stop their game altogether. She definitely doesn’t want that, even though not being allowed to come is quickly driving her insane.

_“Oh really? Because it felt like you were getting ready to come. Did I give you permission to do so?”_

_“No, you didn’t. But I wasn’t going to.”_

_“Clarke,”_ Lexa clicks her tongue in annoyance, _“I know your body better than you do. Do you really think that I am going to fall for that lie?”_

_“Lexa, please.”_

_“Please, what?”_

_“Please let me come. I can’t take the torture anymore.”_

_“Yes, you can. You were doing great until just a minute ago.”_

_“But Lexie…”_

_“Yes, Clarke?”_

_“I promise that I’ll be a good girl if you let me.”_

_“So, you admit that you were naughty?”_

_“Yes, alright. I was bad to send you naughty pictures while you were working. Now will you fuck me until I come? Beja, Heda.”_

There is something about Clarke speaking Trigedasleng that really gets Lexa going. She can’t really explain it, but it just really turns her on. Maybe it’s the fact that Clarke only does it when they’re being intimate. Lexa can’t be sure, but she really likes it. She reaches forward so that she can take the blindfold off of her wife, tossing the fabric onto the floor. Clarke slowly opens her eyes, her pupils dilating as they adjust to the light. Clarke smiles softly at her wife, leaning up as much as she can so that she can kiss Lexa. Lexa’s hands move towards the scarves on Clarke’s wrist. As she starts to untie them, Clarke pulls away from the kiss.

_“Leave them on.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Yes. I like them.”_

_“Okay. If you’re sure.”_

_“I’m positive. But right now, I need you. Please, baby.”_

Lexa captures Clarke’s lips again, as she pushes back inside of her wife. Clarke moans out against Lexa’s mouth, her hips canting upwards to meet her wife’s thrusts. Lexa keeps one hand on her wife’s hip while the other one makes its way down her body. She continues her slow thrusts, breaking her lips away from Clarke’s mouth to trail kisses down her throat. As her thumb lightly brushes Clarke’s swollen clit, her teeth scrape over the juncture of her wife’s neck. Clarke hisses out in pleasure at the action, her hands pulling roughly against her restraints.

_“God, Lexa. I kind of really hate the fact that I can’t touch you right now.”_

_“Hmmm, I don’t think that you do.”_

Lexa’s sucks down on Clarke’s pulse point, speeding up the pace of her thrusts. By the unsteady movement of her hips, Clarke can tell that Lexa is getting close to her orgasm. As much as she likes the whole being tied up thing, not being able to touch Lexa is starting to drive her crazy. So, she takes advantage of the only two things that she can do right now. She nudges Lexa’s cheek with hers, softly pushing Lexa’s mouth away from her neck. As soon as Lexa turns her head, Clarke makes her move. She latches her mouth onto Lexa’s carotid artery, which is her biggest weakness. The moan that Lexa lets out as Clarke bites down is borderline pornographic and it just spurs Clarke on to enact step two of her plan. She clenches her inner muscles as Lexa thrusts into her, restricting her wife’s movement slightly. The move presses the toy deep inside of Lexa, eliciting another loud moan from the brunette.

_“Fuck Clarke. If you keep doing that, I’m not going to last much longer.”_

_“That’s kind of the point, babe. I want you to come with me.”_

Lexa’s next thrust is met with the same tightening of muscles, causing both women to cry out. Clarke continues her assault on Lexa’s neck as Lexa’s thumb presses firm circles against Clarke’s bundle of nerves.

A particularly hard thrust coupled with a light pinch to her clit sends Clarke over toppling over the edge. Her inner walls tighten around the toy, making it extremely hard for Lexa to move. Clarke moans against Lexa’s neck, biting down on her pulse point to muffle her cry of pleasure. The slight jolt of pain from the bite sends her into her own orgasm, the pleasure amplified from the toy inside of her.

Lexa continues to thrust slightly, drawing out both of their orgasms. She feels a soft flutter against her stomach as she moves to pull out of Clarke, followed by a soft laugh from her wife. She lifts her head up to search Clarke’s face, green eyes questioning. She sits back on her heels, eyes boring into Clarke’s. Clarke laughs again as she wiggles her fingers at Lexa. Lexa brings her hands up to Clarke’s wrists, deftly untying the knots. As soon as Clarke’s wrists are freed, her hands come up to cup Lexa’s face.

_“Apparently you woke your child up.”_

_“Is that what that was?”_

_“Yes, dear. That was baby Woods attempting to kick you.”_

_“Oh my god.”_

_“I know. It’s pretty amazing, right?”_

_“There’s a life inside of you.”_

_“Yeah, tell me about it. And right now said life is moving quite a bit, which is making me have to pee.”_

_“You should probably do something about that before you pee on the bed.”_

_“I can’t feel my legs. Carry me.”_

Lexa laughs, moving off of the side of the bed. She quickly removes the toy, setting it down on the floor so that she can help Clarke up.

_“I am not carrying you to the bathroom, Clarke. That seems dangerous.”_

_“But, Lexa. It’s your child’s fault that I have to pee. And it’s your fault that I can’t feel my legs.”_

_“I know. And I love you. But you can make it to the bathroom.”_

_“Ugh, you suck.”_

_“I love you too.”_

Lexa laughs at her wife as Clarke sends an angry glare her way. Clarke sticks her tongue out at Lexa as she makes her way into the bathroom.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Twenty Weeks**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Around the twentieth week of her pregnancy, Clarke started to go a little bit stir crazy. Lexa had finished up and won (Of course) her big murder trial. She was still working quite a bit, but she was home every night before dinner. Clarke wasn’t upset about Lexa still working a lot, it would help her save up vacation hours for when the baby came. The gallery only managed to distract her during the day. And when it was slow, she would spend her time eating whatever food the baby craved while binge watching crappy shows on Netflix.

One day while lounging around at home waiting for Lexa to come home, she discovered the do it yourself network. After watching some random craft show that she can’t recall the name of, she came up with an idea. But, she was going to need help from her delinquents in order to bring her plan to fruition.

**_Princess: Hey guys, I need your help._ **

**_Mama O: With…_ **

**_Rae Bae: I’m in._ **

**_Mama O: You don’t even know what she’s going to ask us._ **

**_Rae Bae: I don’t care. Her pregnancy hormones are all over the place right now. Whatever she needs help with will probably be something fun._ **

**_Princess: I’ve decided that I want to build all of the furniture for the baby’s nursery by hand. Aside from the crib of course._ **

**_Mama O: Hard pass. I’ll help paint, but you both know that I’m shit when it comes to using power tools. Remember when we built the treehouse for Ricky?_ **

**_Rae Bae: You mean when Lexa, Clarke, Lincoln and I built the treehouse for Ricky? After you broke three of your fingers with a hammer._ **

**_Mama O: That was an accident. The nail moved._ **

**_Rae Bae: Yeah, because you weren’t holding onto it. We all decided that you were no longer allowed to use any tools after that day._ **

**_Princess: Didn’t you also manage to saw off some of your hair?_ **

**_Mama O: Please don’t remind me. I swear that section of my hair is still shorter than the rest._ **

**_Princess: Yeah, you’re probably right. So, you aren’t allowed to help us build, but you can help paint. Since I should probably stay away from paint fumes and all that right now._ **

**_Rae Bae: Alright. I am so down for this adventure. My only demand is that you provide us with Thai food as payment for our hard labor._ **

**_Princess: How about anything but Thai? Baby Woods does not enjoy Thai food. Like at all._ **

**_Mama O: How does baby Woods feel about pot stickers and Chinese?_ **

**_Princess: So far we have not had any disagreements with Chinese._ **

**_Rae Bae: Okay. Chinese and pot stickers it is. Even though I would kill for some Pad Thai right about now._ **

**_Princess: Sorry Rae. I’ve tried to eat Thai on multiple occasions since I got pregnant and each time the baby has not let me keep it down. I can’t even smell it anymore without getting sick._ **

**_Rae Bae: No worries Clarkey. Chinese is almost as good as Thai. Almost. Plus I can’t complain since you’re paying for it._ **

**_Mama O: So, when do you want to stay on Baby Woods’ room?_ **

**_Princess: This weekend if you guys are able to._ **

**_Mama O: As long as you are cool with Ricky being with me, this weekend is doable._ **

**_Rae Bae: I’m free. We can have Ahn distract the Commander so that she is out of the house._ **

**_Princess: Cool. That works for me. I’ll see you guys this weekend._ **

 

Clarke spends the rest of the week drawing out her plans for the nursery and pricing materials that she’s going to need. She has decided to keep her plans for the baby’s room a secret from Lexa, hoping to surprise her wife. Since they have opted to keep the baby’s gender a surprise, she picks out gender neutral colors. Pink and blue included because gender specific colors are not a thing in her book.

She is super excited about keeping their baby’s gender a secret, but at the same time she’s really hoping for a baby girl. She wants to have a mini Lexa running around, with wild chestnut curls and a sharp jawline. She wouldn’t be opposed to her daughter having Lexa’s green eyes either. Lexa wants the baby to have Clarke’s blue eyes. So, really, they’ll be happy either way. As long as their baby is healthy, that’s all that matters.

Raven and Octavia show up bright and early Saturday morning, with a still sleeping Ricky in tow. Clarke wakes Lexa up with fresh coffee and sweet, sleepy kisses. After which she tells a still half asleep Lexa to get dressed and ready to leave the house.

 _“Where am I going?”_ Lexa asks sleepily, sipping her coffee. She scrunches her nose as the heat burns her tongue slightly.

_“Anya is taking you out for some much needed best friend time. Quit grumbling and get ready.”_

_“But, what are you going to do while I’m gone?”_ Lexa questions with a pout. Clarke laughs at her wife, leaning over on the bed so that she can kiss the pout off of Lexa’s lips.

_“Raven and O are here. We are going to have a girl’s day.”_

_“But, why can’t I be a part of your girl’s day?”_

_“Because I said so.”_

_“Clarke…”_

_“Lex, baby. You need to spend time with Anya. She needs your help with wedding stuff so that Raven will stop dragging her feet.”_

_“Raven needs to girl up. They’ve been together longer than we have.”_

_“Yeah, but they had that hiccup during my junior year.”_

_“Still. That was four years ago.”_

_“I know. Those two need to get their shit together. I sunk my hooks into you and married you right after I graduated.”_

_“I asked you actually.”_

_“Eh. Semantics.”_

_“Too bad that Raven and Anya are both idiots.”_

_“They really are. I feel like we’ll be old and gray by the time they finally tie the knot.”_

_“If we don’t meddle, we probably will be.”_

_“So, we meddle. Now, stop stalling and go get ready.”_

_“I don’t want to get ready. I want to stay in bed with you all day.”_

Lexa sets her coffee down on her bedside table. She wraps her arms around Clarke’s waist and pulls them both down onto the bed. Clarke immediately settles her back against Lexa’s front, giggling as Lexa’s hand slightly tickles her stomach. The moment doesn’t last long, however, because Lexa is particularly handsy in the mornings. Her hand slowly moves up Clarke’s body, cupping her breast underneath her tank top.

 _“Lexa.”_ Clarke gasps out as Lexa pinches her nipple.

 _“Hmm?”_ Lexa feigns ignorance, gently kneading the sensitive flesh.

_“Don’t you dare start something that you’re not going to finish.”_

_“Who said that I wasn’t going to finish?”_

_“Babe, we don’t have time.”_

_“Ugh. You’re really set on me leaving the house, aren’t you?”_

_“Of course not. I would love nothing more than to have you all to myself today. But, who knows how many chances you are going to have to hang out with Anya before the baby comes? Once Baby Woods finally shows up, we will have literally no free time.”_

Clarke feels Lexa’s lips curl up into a smile against the back of her neck. Her hand abandons its spot on her breast to slide back down her body, stopping when it reaches her baby bump. Lexa sighs softly as she runs her hand up and down Clarke’s stomach.

_“I can’t wait to meet our baby.”_

Tears immediately well up in Clarke’s eyes at Lexa’s declaration. Damn pregnancy hormones.

_“Me either. Four months to go. Then we will finally get to meet our baby boy or girl.”_

_“Would you rather have a boy or a girl?”_

_“I don’t care either way, really. It would be awesome to have a mini you running around though.”_

_“Alright. You two better not be naked right now.”_ Clarke and Lexa hear Raven yell as she barges into their bedroom. _“You guys need to get up and get ready. Anya is about ready to lose her shit.”_

_“Tell her to chil au. It takes as long as it takes.”_

_“Lexa. She told me to tell you that if you don’t get your ass out of bed, she’s going to come into the house so that she can show Clarke the picture that your mom took of you that one Halloween.”_

Lexa visibly pales are Raven’s words, squeaking as she jumps out of bed. She pulls open a dresser drawer and blindly reaches into it to grab some clothes. Raven plops down on the bed next to Clarke with a sigh, turning to face her best friend.

_“Are you ready to get this party started, Princess?”_

_“Hell yes. As soon as my wife gets the hell out of this house, we can get started.”_

_“Lexa!!! Hurry the fuck up before I let Anya in the house.”_

_“Calm your tits, Raven.”_ Lexa yells from behind the closed bathroom door.

_“Dude, you’d better chill out. The last thing that I need is for you to piss off the Commander.”_

_“Please. Lexa’s hot when she’s angry.”_

_“She’s hot all the time. But, you’re right. She is super hot when she gets mad.”_

_“How’s the parasite inside of you doing?”_

_“Good, good. Super active this morning.”_

Clarke grabs Raven’s hand and places it under her tank top. A few seconds after resting her hand on Clarke’s stomach, she feels the baby shift under her hand.

_“That feels really weird.”_

_“It feels even weirder from the inside, trust me.”_

_“Dude, I do not envy you at all. When Anya and I are ready for an ankle biter, I am so not going to be the one to get pregnant.”_

_“You don’t want to have a Raven Junior growing inside of you?”_

_“Fuck no. I’ll just pull a Lexa and put one of my super awesome eggs inside of Anya.”_

_“You know that I didn’t actually put one of my eggs inside of Clarke, right? A doctor ripped a bunch of my eggs out and fertilized them with sperm that Lincoln provided. After the eggs were fertilized they put them inside of Clarke.”_ Lexa says as she walks out of the bathroom putting the finishing touches on her signature braid. She’s dressed down for once in a pair of dark blue skinny jeans and a purple button up. Clarke discreetly wipes at the sides of her mouth, wiping away the drool that is probably there. Her wife looks extremely sexy right now, and she really wants to drag her back into bed so that she can ravish her. Damn pregnancy hormones. Luckily, or unluckily for her, Raven’s presence in their bed is a major twat block.

_“Dude, you look like you’re about to turn Lexa into a meal.”_

_“There’s definitely a part of her that I would like to eat right about now.”_

_“Nice. I’m glad to see that my crassness is rubbing off on you.”_

_“Thanks. But, unfortunately for me, Anya will kill me if I keep you in the house any longer. So, my love, go spend time with your best friend. I’ll see you for dinner.”_

Clarke reluctantly pulls herself out of bed. The other thing that she has noticed about this pregnancy is that she is hot, all the time. It doesn’t help that they are smack dab in the middle of the hottest summer to date. She often goes to bed without a stitch of clothing on, much to Lexa’s approval. She knew that Raven and Octavia were going to come over early and with Raven’s tendency to barge into a room without knocking, she wore a tank top and panties to bed. She should probably go buy some new bed clothes, because this tank top doesn’t really fit anymore. The fabric is stretched tightly around her baby bump, but she doesn’t care. Lexa comes around to her side of the bed, wrapping her arms around Clarke’s waist. Clarke turns in Lexa’s arms so that she can face her wife. She smiles at Lexa, leaning in to kiss her softly.

_“You’re making me stay away until dinner time?”_

_“Yes baby. I have stuff to do.”_

_“But, baby.”_

_“Lex. I promise that it’s going to be worth it.”_

_“If you say so.”_

_“It will be.”_

_“I love you.”_

_“I love you too. Now go.”_

_“Fine.”_

With one more kiss, Lexa’s pulls away from her wife. She grabs Clarke’s coffee off of the bedside table and gulps it down.

_“You’re not supposed to have caffeine.”_

_“It’s decaf?”_

_“No, it’s not.”_

_“Okay, it’s not. But, I am allowed to have one cup.”_

_“Oh well. I’ll consider your half cup as a sacrifice for kicking me out of the house.”_

_“Anya’s turning the car off now.”_

_“Shit. Okay, love you. Bye.”_

 

The rest of their morning is spent painting the nursery. The theme that Clarke had picked out was based on a series of dreams that she had when she was still in college. Her junior year art final involved a picture of Lexa that was from the same set of dreams. She called them, when the sky met the ground. They had depicted space and the earth into the paint scheme. Clarke had drawn the scenes on the walls, while Raven and Octavia painted everything. While they were painting, Clarke hung out with her godson and drew out plans for the furniture.

By the time lunch rolls around, all three girls have worked up quite an appetite. They order way too much food for the three of them and Ricky from their favorite Chinese place. The person on the phone tells Clarke that the delivery will be around forty five minutes, which is fine with everybody. They settle down in the living room to wait for their food. Clarke is the first to break their comfortable silence, as she bounces a very cranky Ricky in her lap. He has an appetite like his father, and gets very angry when he is hungry.

_“So, Rae, when are you going to girl up?”_

_“Girl up and what?”_

_“Girl up and marry Anya.”_

_“Um, soon.”_ Raven fidgets in her seat as Clarke keeps her eyes trained on her best friend. She picks up her coffee cup and takes a sip, eyebrows raised in question. She maybe made another cup of coffee after Lexa left, but she swore her best friends to secrecy. By threatening to cut out their tongues.

_“Really? Because you guys have been together for almost five years. Why are you still dragging your feet?”_

_“I’m not.”_ Raven shifts her attention to the television, pretending to be really interested in the children’s show that they have playing for Ricky.

 _“But you are. What’s the big deal, Rae? You’re the last of our group that isn’t married.”_ Octavia questions as she lounges back in her favorite recliner.

_“I don’t know, guys. Just scared, I guess.”_

_“No. The great Raven Reyes isn’t scared of anything.”_ Octavia replies, fiddling with the television remote.

_“Shush, asshole. Even I am not immune to fear. This is like a huge step, you know?”_

_“Yeah, we both know all about how huge of a step marriage is.”_

_“So, you can’t blame me for being hesitant.”_

_“I mean, you guys already live together. All of your bills are joint accounts. It’s really just a piece of paper that you’re missing.”_

_“Yeah, it’s not the actual marriage that scares me, it what happens next.”_

_“What happens next?”_

Before Raven can respond, the doorbell cuts off their conversation. Clarke gets off the couch with a grunt, grabbing her wallet off the kitchen table before opening the front door. She quickly pays the delivery driver, tipping the teenager generously before he leaves. She hefts the bags of food into the living room and drops them on the table.

They don’t bother with plates, just digging their forks into the different containers. They’ve all been friends long enough to not bother with good manners. Clarke alternates her bites with smaller bites for Ricky.

_“You know what happens next.”_

_“Please elaborate, Raven.”_ Clarke says through her mouthful of food.

_“Seriously, Clarke?”_

_“Yes, Rae. We’re your friends. Just tell us.”_

_“You know why.”_

_“Still, talk to us.”_

_“Because. Next thing that she’s going to want is a kid. And I don’t know if I’m ready for that.”_

_“Still back to the whole kids thing? We thought that you were over that.”_

_“I am. I mean, I think that I am.”_

_“Are you sure? You know that she’s not going to pressure you.”_

_“Yeah, I know. But you guys remember what happened our junior year.”_

_“You mean the whole break that you guys had.”_

_“Yes, that. That was the worst summer of my life.”_

_“We know.”_

_“Do you guys? I mean, I know that we talked on the phone. But you both were gone for almost the entire summer. I was alone. On campus. Heartbroken.”_

_“Rae, you know that you could’ve come with us.”_

_“Yeah, you make it sound like Clarke and I abandoned you.”_

_“Essentially, that’s exactly what happened.”_

_“Seriously?”_

_“I don’t mean it like that, Clarke. I just mean that you guys were busy doing your own things. O had Bell’s wedding, plus the whole pregnancy thing to deal with. You and Lexa were on your trip, dealing with seeing your mom again after two years. Plus the added pressure of figuring out a new relationship. It was just a lot for both of you to deal with, you didn’t need to deal with my relationship problems too.”_

_“Rae.”_ Octavia nudges Raven’s thigh with her toes. Raven looks over at her best friend, a sad smile gracing her features.

_“Dude, don’t worry about it. This was four years ago. It’s over.”_

_“Clarke and I didn’t know that you felt abandoned.”_

_“It’s not a big deal. I’m just trying to make a point here. I almost lost Anya the first time that kids were talked about. I CAN’T lose her.”_

_“Rae, you…hold this for a second Rick Rick.”_ Clarke hands Ricky her container of broccoli chicken. His small hands struggle with the container at first, but eventually he manages to grasp it. Clarke scoots over on the couch until she is next to Raven. She nudges Raven with her head until Raven lifts her arm up for Clarke to snuggle under. _“You’re not going to lose her. The first fight started because she was being pushy and you didn’t want to open up to her. It just so happened that the conversation before the fight was about kids. It could’ve been anything else. You guys have never really been good at communicating. Now, I know that things have changed since that fight and you are a lot better about talking to her, but this is something that you need to tell her. You’ve been engaged for almost two years now. It’s time.”_

_“Yeah, you aren’t getting any younger.”_

_“Fu…fudge off, Octavia.”_

_“What fud…fudge off mean, Mama?”_

_“Nothing that you need to worry about, baby. Auntie Raven just has a dirty mouth.”_

_“Why she eat dirt?”_

_“Because she’s weird, Rick Rick.”_

_“Oh. Annie Ray, dirt taste good?”_

_“Dirt is okay, little man. But carpet is so much better.”_

_“Seriously, dude?”_

_“What?”_

_“Do you just lack a filter, or are you not even trying?”_

_“I don’t know what you mean, Octavia.”_

_“You just told my four year old son that carpet tastes good.”_

_“Well, it does. I know that you don’t have any experience when it comes to carpentry. If you don’t believe me, just ask Clarke.”_

_“Oh my god, Raven. I am going to kick the shi…snot out of you.”_

_“Bring it, binch.”_

_“Girls, stop arguing. Let’s eat so that we can get back to work.”_

_“Fine. But don’t think that I’ll forget about this. If Ricky goes home and says anything about eating carpet, I’m going to beat you.”_

_“I’m looking forward to it, baby.”_ Raven winks at Octavia, who offers up her middle finger as an answer.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Twenty-Eight Weeks**

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“I swear to god, I’m going to fucking murder Raven.”_ Clarke pants out as she pulls her dress over her head. She waits as Octavia zips the material up her back before turning around to face the mirror. _“Nope.”_

_“No? Why?”_

_“Why? Because I look like a fucking beached whale, is why. I’m not wearing this dress to the wedding.”_

_“It looks nice, Clarke. And you don’t look like a beached whale. You are seven months pregnant.”_

_“I know. I can’t see my feet anymore. But I’m sure that they look fat too.”_

_“They look fine.”_

_“You’re a terrible liar. And why did I agree to this? I was sure that she was going to wait until after the baby came to have her wedding. But no, she had to girl up and do it when I was at my prime fatness.”_

_“Hey, be thankful that she didn’t have the wedding during the summer. At least it’s October, so you won’t sweat like a fat pig while we’re outside.”_

_“A fat pig!? Seriously, O?”_

_“What? I was just saying what you were thinking.”_

_“You’re an asshole.”_

_“I was kidding, Clarke. You look great.”_

_“I don’t believe you.”_ Clarke pulls at the dress, attempting to take it off. It’s way too tight to come off without unzipping it, but dammit, she’s going to try.

_“I’m serious, babe. You look great.”_

_“No. I’m gianormous and I’ll be sweaty. Even if it’s cool outside.”_

_“You aren’t and you won’t.”_

_“Liar. Just make up an excuse about why I can’t be at the wedding. Raven will understand.”_

_“No, she won’t. Because you’re going.”_

_“No, I’m not.”_

Octavia discreetly pulls out her phone while attempting to talk Clarke down. She opens up a new text message and adds Raven and Lexa as the recipients.

**_Mama O: SOS. Guys we have a level five emergency._ **

**_Commander: Level five!?!?! It’s way too early._ **

**_Rae Bae : Oh shit! Seriously? She would do this on my wedding day._ **

**_Commander: Okay. What do I do?_ **

**_Rae Bae: How dilated is she?_ **

**_Mama O: What the fuck are you guys talking about?_ **

**_Commander: You said level five. Level five is labor._ **

**_Rae Bae: How far apart are contractions?_ **

**_Mama O: Dude, no. She’s not in labor._ **

**_Rae Bae: Oh thank Cthulhu. I was so not ready to deliver a baby today._ **

**_Mama O: She’s having a mental breakdown._ **

**_Rae Bae: Like how serious is it?_ **

**_Mama O: Like almost panic attack serious. She’s talking about how fat she looks in her dress and that she’s not going to show up._ **

**_Commander: Can either of you explain to me why my best friend is passed out on the floor of my room? This is Anya by the way._ **

**_Rae Bae: Oh…hey honey. We may or may not have had a miscommunication that led Lexa to believe that Clarke was in labor._ **

**_Commander: What?!_ **

**_Rae Bae: Don’t worry, she’s not. She is just having a pregnancy brain moment. She thinks that she looks fat in her dress and she refuses to come out of the room._ **

**_Commander: I’m coming over there._ **

**_Rae Bae: No! I can take care of it. Send Lexa for back-up._ **

**_Commander: Who do you think Clarke is more afraid of? Me? Or Lexa?_ **

**_Rae Bae: Well it’s bad luck for us to see each other today, so I will stay away. Sorry, O._ **

**_Mama O: It’s all good. Just come talk some sense into this girl, Anya._ **

**_Commander: I’m on my way._ **

_“O? Are you even listening to me right now?”_ Clarke huffs out as she pulls at the fabric of the dress.

_“Um, no?”_

_“What the hell?”_

_“You’re being irrational, Clarke.”_

_“I’m not. Would you be part of a wedding if you were seven months pregnant?”_

_“If it was you or Raven, yes. Or Bell.”_

_“Bullshit.”_

_“I would. And I know that you are having a tough time being seven months pregnant, believe me, I know. But, you need to suck it up and be there for Rae. This is a big step for her and we have to stand up there beside her.”_

_“CLARKE JANE WOODS!!!!”_

Clarke’s eyes widen comically as Anya steps into the room. She’s clad in a bathrobe, her dirty blonde hair half pinned up on top of her head. The look in her eyes is murderous, and Clarke would be lying if she said that she wasn’t terrified right now.

_“Hey Anya.”_

_“Don’t you hey me. What the fuck is going on here?”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“Well, first off, why is my best friend passed out in my dressing room?”_

_“What?! Lexa passed out? Like passed out as in asleep, or passed out as in fainted?”_ Clarke questions Anya, walking towards the blonde with panic in her voice.

_“The latter.”_

_“What? Why? What the hell happened?”_

_“Apparently you two idiot best friends have a code system with her for emergencies. They told her that they had a level five emergency, which as it turns out, is the code for you going into labor.”_

_“Seriously O?”_

_“Yeah. It was my fault actually. I forgot what level five was. I thought that level six was labor.”_

_“Jesus Christ. If you killed my wife, I swear to Cthulhu…”_

_“She’s not dead. She’s just passed out on the floor.”_

_“You left her on the floor?”_ Clarke asks, incredulously.

_“Not exactly. Well, I did, but Lincoln is going to get her off the floor. And that is beside the point. Raven and Octavia said that you are refusing to come to the wedding.”_

_“Yes. They’re telling the truth.”_

_“That is not acceptable, Clarke.”_

_“Look at me, Anya.”_ Clarke motions to her body. _“I look like a beached whale.”_

_“No, you don’t, Clarke. What you do look like is, a woman who is seven months pregnant. But, that dress looks really nice on you.”_

_“Don’t lie to me, Anya.”_

_“I’m not. It looks nice. Now if you don’t stop being an irrational pregnant bitch, I’m going to be forced to kick your ass. And I’m not exactly keen on beating a pregnant woman.”_

Clarke and Anya are broken out of their argument by the sound of the door crashing against the wall. A very out of breath and flustered Lexa barges into the room. Her emerald green eyes are wide with panic as she searches the room.

_“Why is everybody just standing here? We need to get to the hospital.”_

_“Baby.”_ Clarke tries.

Lexa walks up to Clarke, pulling her into a tight embrace.

_“It’s going to be okay. Even though baby Woods is making an appearance two months early, everything is going to be fine.”_

_“Lex…”_

Lexa presses a kiss to Clarke’s temple.

_“I promise that he or she is going to be super healthy. They are probably going to be really small, but super healthy nonetheless. By the way, I think that I passed out and hit my head on a table.”_

Clarke glances over Lexa’s shoulder so that she can send Anya a death glare.

_“Lexa, the baby is not coming.”_

_“What? But, level five.”_

_“Octavia got her numbers mixed up. I am so not in labor right now. Although, this stress is enough to set me off.”_

_“Oh, thank god. That baby needs more time to baste.”_

_“Yeah. Baby Woods needs some more cooking time. But on a side note, what was that thing about you hitting your head?”_

_“Yeah. I think that I hit my head when I fell down. It was bleeding, but I think that it stopped.”_

_“You’re BLEEDING?!”_ Clarke moves out of Lexa’s arms so that she can examine her wife’s skull. She gently runs her fingers through Lexa’s hair, pulling back when her wife hisses out in pain. _“Shit. Are you okay, baby?”_

_“Yeah. It’s just sore.”_

Clarke’s fingers search out the wound again, parting chestnut curls so that she can get a good look at it. The wound isn’t very big, but it is still bleeding. Even with Clarke’s rudimentary medical knowledge, she’s pretty sure that it’s going to need at least a few stitches.

_“Alright baby. Let’s go see my mom so she can stitch you up. And then we’ll come back so we can get ready.”_

_“But…”_

_“No buts. You need to get this stitched up. My mom is highly likely to have brought a first aid kit with her. So, unless you want to spend the next five to six hours in the emergency room, I suggest we go see my mom.”_

_“Right. Let’s go.”_

_“You two have three hours until wedding time. Don’t make me come look for you.”_ Anya warns the two women.

 _“Don’t even start. This is your fault, Anya.”_ Clarke narrows her eyes at the other blonde.

_“What? How is this my fault?”_

_“Because you left her on the floor so that you could come yell at me.”_

_“I’m not the one that made her pass out in the first place. Blame your friends for that.”_

_“Nope. This irrational pregnant bitch is going to blame you.”_

Clarke grabs Lexa’s hand and leads her out of the room, leaving a flabbergasted Anya in her wake.

 _“I thought that you said Clarke was afraid of you.”_ Octavia says between laughs.

_“Shut up, Octavia.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

_“Ouch!”_

_“Oh, quit being a baby, Lexa.”_

_“Um, excuse me. Your mom is sticking a needle in my head. I’m allowed to be in pain.”_

_“I grew up with her, I know all about getting stitched up by my mom, thanks. O and I we frequent visitors to my mom’s alleyway clinic when we were kids.”_

_“Ladies, I can hear you both. Clarke, I don’t like when you say that. It makes it seem like I ran a backdoor clinic out of my house. Clarke is right Lexa, she’s had stitches many times in her life. Those two girls got into a lot of trouble together.”_

_“Like the time that Octavia pushed me out of the tree in the backyard and I hit my head on a rock?”_

_“Yes. You needed fifteen stitches to close that gash on your skull. You were so mad that I had to shave part of your head.”_

_“Or that time that Octavia and I were skateboarding and she fell down that flight of stairs. She has a huge scar on the back of her thigh from that one.”_

_“Yeah, that was like forty stitches.”_

_“Wow, Clarke. It’s a miracle that you and Octavia survived your childhoods.”_

_“Yeah, we were always daredevils. Bellamy didn’t help matters any. He liked to egg us on.”_

_“Bellamy was more often than not, the instigator of said stunts.”_

_“Yeah, half the time he was the one that planned them out for O and I.”_

With one last tug that makes Lexa grunt slightly, Abby ties off the stitches and cuts the excess fabric. _“Alright Lexa, you are all stitched up.”_

_“Thanks, Mama K.”_

Clarke grimaces slightly as Lexa addresses her mom. _“I don’t think that I’ll ever get used to the fact that neither one of us is a Griffin anymore. It’s weird.”_

Abby’s eyes soften at the pain in Clarke’s voice. This is something that they haven’t talked about yet. Anything involving Jake is a sore spot for Clarke. Abby is especially afraid of what Clarke’s reaction will be with her hormones so out of whack. But, it seems like her daughter wants to have this conversation, so Abby will continue.

_“I know it is baby. Even though we no longer carry the Griffin last name doesn’t mean that we aren’t Griffins at heart.”_

_“I jjjus…”_ Clarke clears her throat, swallowing past the lump that has formed there. _“I just wish that he could be here, you know? He would be so excited about the baby.”_

_“I know you do, Clarke. I wish that your father was still here too. I know that it’s not the same, but Marcus is really excited about the baby.”_

_“I’m glad. I may not have said that before. But I am really happy that he gets to experience having a grandchild. Dad would’ve wanted Marcus to be the one to take care of you if anything happened to him. And he would want you to be happy.”_

The sheer joy in Abby’s eyes is enough to make Lexa tear up. She knows that most of the rift in Clarke and Abby’s relationship stems from Abby getting married to Marcus. Even though she had remarried almost a decade after Jake’s untimely death, Clarke still saw her attempt at being happy as a betrayal to Jake’s memory. They had long since made up and Clarke has come to terms with having Marcus as her step-father. Hearing Clarke say that Marcus was going to have a grandchild was a huge deal for Abby, and Lexa is really glad that Clarke is allowing him the chance.

**~*~*~*~*~***

_From what Clarke has told Lexa, Jake and Marcus were childhood friends. They grew up thick as thieves, until the day that Jake passed away. They met Abby in their freshman year in high school, and Marcus was immediately captivated. Marcus and Jake were polar opposites in high school. Marcus was a jock, captain of the football team. He was popular and very well liked. Jake on the other hand was a quiet, quirky science nerd. He was popular because of his friendship with Marcus._

_Abby was different. Different in the sense that she was very smart and disciplined in her academics. But she was also involved in cheerleading and she played on the girls’ basketball team. Even though Marcus was every girls’ dream at their school, Jake was the one that Abby chose._

_Jake didn’t even pursue Abby. He knew that his best friend had a huge crush on Abby. Best friend rules meant that he couldn’t have a crush on Abby. So, he admired the new girl from afar, while Marcus tried and failed to woo her._

_Things were going pretty well on the whole avoiding Abby thing, until the day that they were paired up for a project in their AP Chemistry class._

_Those two weeks were all it took for Jake’s ironclad resolve to crumble._

_Abby was everything that he could ever want. She was funny, beautiful, and absolutely brilliant._

_At the end of those two weeks, he was crushing so hard on Abagail Porter. And the best/worst part about the situation?_

_She was crushing on him, too._

_Abby was bold where Jake was timid. She knew that he would never take the next step in their tentative friendship._

_She didn’t know that Marcus had a thing for her. So, she continued on her way, attempting to get Jake to ask her out._

_It took her two months of constant flirting for her to figure out that Jake was completely oblivious to her advances._

_Another month of practically throwing herself at Jake’s feet is when she finally ran out of patience. They were studying for a Chemistry exam at their local café when Abby finally lost it._

_She asked him out after screaming at him about being a chicken. He was too shocked to do anything but nod._

_The rest is history._

_So, it wasn’t really much of a surprise to Clarke when Marcus made his move. But, like her parent’s history, their fight about Abby betraying Jake was over and done with._

**~*~*~*~*~***

The wedding is everything that Clarke thought it would be. It’s beautiful and lowkey, and it screams Raven and Anya. Clarke surprisingly managed to keep her emotions in check until Raven recited her vows. As soon as Raven choked up and started crying, Clarke was done for.

Seeing her best friend so happy after being dealt such a shit hand in life was everything. Clarke was so, so ecstatic for the two of them.

After a short ceremony and a long reception that left everybody except Clarke a little bit drunk, Raven and Anya headed off for their honeymoon in the Bahamas.

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Thirty-Seven Weeks**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Less than one month left. Baby Woods will finally make his or her appearance sometime in the next three weeks. Honestly, Clarke can’t wait. She’s so tired of being pregnant. No, wait, that’s not right. For the most part, she has loved being pregnant. She’s had a relatively easy pregnancy so far. Aside from the super annoying and frequent morning sickness that she experienced in the first trimester, it’s been a quiet ride.

There are a few things that she is tired of, however. She is tired of not being able to see her feet. Or her legs. Or the bottom half of her body really. She can’t see anything below the bulging bump of her belly, but she’s pretty sure that everything is swollen. Her feet feel like they are ten times their normal size.

She’s tired of her boobs being so sore. Lexa is loving it, because her already bountiful chest has grown quite a bit in size since she became pregnant. At first it really didn’t bother her, in fact she quite enjoyed it. Her breasts had always been sensitive, and she took great pleasure in the fact that Lexa so thoroughly enjoyed her ‘assets.’ Now that she is at the tail end of her pregnancy, she can’t stand them being touched. It’s sad, really, to deny Lexa the luxury of the girls, but they are so sensitive that they hurt. There is no pleasure in them being touched anymore, just pain.

Her sex drive has gone from overactive to nonexistent in the last month. It’s not even that she isn’t horny anymore, because she is. She is so uncomfortable in her own body right now, that she doesn’t want Lexa to touch her. It makes her feel like she is thirteen again.

**~*~*~*~*~***

_Body issues were an on an off struggle in her preteen years. She was always slightly bigger than the other girls in her class. She had curves, but when you’re twelve years old, sometimes curves led to teasing. She was never bullied per se, but she didn’t always feel pretty around the other girls at school._

_Once puberty hit, all of those negative feelings disappeared. High school started, and Clarke filled out. Her ‘baby fat’ turned into curves that were to die for, while her chest filled out. She finally felt pretty and it wasn’t because of the attention that she was getting. Because honestly, she didn’t care about that._

_She was still devastated over the loss of her father and way too busy with her studies to notice. Her mother had gone into tyrant mode and forced her to excel in all of her academics. She was going to be a surgeon, just like Abby._

_The stress from school and the loss of Jake were just a few of her problems._

_As she got more comfortable in her skin, she started to notice other things around her. Lots of guys at school were vying for her attention, but she was starting to notice the fairer sex._

_So, she’s more comfortable with how she looks, but now she’s questioning her sexuality. At first she thought that she was just admiring other girls so that she could compare herself to them. It wasn’t until one day that she realized that her admiration was actually attraction._

_It was four months into her freshman year when she first saw her. She was sitting in her third period biology class next to Octavia when their teacher interrupted their group lab work. Next to Mr. Sinclair was a girl that they had never seen before. Sinclair introduced the new girl that had just transferred to their school._

_Her name was Aurora, yes like the Disney princess. No, she didn’t like being called by her first name. She told everybody to call her Rory in a quiet voice._

_It was pure luck that Octavia and Clarke’s table had space for one more. They sat with another of their childhood friends, Wells. Sinclair told Rory that she could have a seat at their table. She nodded her head, biting down on her lower lip as she shyly made her way over to their table._

_Clarke was transfixed. This girl was absolutely beautiful. Her dark brown hair was just past her shoulders, and it was slightly wavy. She had breathtakingly beautiful hazel eyes, though they were wide with trepidation and fear._

_It wasn’t until Octavia nudged her shoulder that Clarke broke out of her reverie._

_“This creeper over here is Clarke.” Octavia spoke for her, because apparently her mouth was no longer getting signals from her brain._

_“Nice to meet you, Clarke.”_

_Oh gosh, her voice. It was soft but strong, almost angelic in its tone._

_“Um, yeah, you too.”_

_That was the first time that Clarke became a bumbling, gay mess in front of a pretty girl. Only she didn’t notice it immediately. After another month of being tongue-tied every time she was around Rory, Clarke finally had a revelation. She was sitting in her living room with Octavia, working on homework when it finally clicked into place._

_“O?”_

_“What’s up, Princess?”_

_“Do you think that Rory is pretty?”_

_Octavia looks up from her notebook, eyebrows scrunched up in confusion._

_“I don’t know. I mean, I guess that she’s alright. I never really thought about it.”_

_“Have you ever thought that another girl was pretty?”_

_“Not that I am aware of. Objectively, I guess. I think that you’re pretty. Why do you ask?”_

_“I don’t know.” Clarke takes a deep breath to calm her nerves before meeting Octavia’s questioning gaze. “I think that Rory is really pretty.”_

_“So? It’s normal to compare yourself to other girls. We all do it.”_

_“That’s not what I meant.”_

_“What do you mean then?”_

_“What I mean is that sometimes when I look at her, I get this fuzzy feeling in my stomach. Kind of like butterflies, I guess. And I think that I might want to kiss her.”_

_“You what?”_

_“Sometimes in class I stare at her lips and I wonder what they would feel like against mine. Is that totally weird?”_

_“I don’t think so. Have you had that feeling before?”_

_“No, I mean I’ve thought that girls were pretty before, but I’ve never had the urge to kiss one. Am I gay?”_

_“I can’t answer that for you. But maybe this can put things into perspective for you. Do you think about guys the same way that you think about girls?”_

_“I guess. I think that Bell and Wells are cute, but I don’t want to kiss either one of them.”_

_“That is a terrible example because you have known both of them since we were in kindergarten. Let’s use Lincoln as an example. What do you think about him?”_

_“Lincoln is cute. I wouldn’t mind kissing him.”_

_“Okay, so does thinking about kissing him give you butterflies?”_

_“No.”_

_“Why not?”_

_“Because he’s yours.”_

_“Well, yeah, that’s true. But ignore that fact for a few seconds.”_

_“I don’t know, O. They are both attractive and I would not be opposed to kissing either one, but I get more excited thinking about Rory.”_

_“That might just be because it is a new feeling to you. I think, that maybe you’re attracted to both guys and girls. So, you’re probably bisexual.”_

_“Maybe. Enough about my problems. How are things going with you and Lincoln?”_

_“Okay, I guess. He still treats me like one of the guys. It’s weird. I’ve tried flirting with him, but nothing seems to make a difference. I’m beginning to think the Bellamy was lying when he said that Lincoln liked me.”_

_“Oh please. He’s crazy about you. He’s just terrified.”_

_“He has no reason to be.”_

_“Why?”_

_“Because at the rate he’s going, I’ll either be friend-zoned or worse. He’s never going to make a move.”_

_“Maybe you need to be the one to make a move.”_

_“I tried. I kissed him on the cheek once.”_

_“Oh, oh the cheek, you say?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Okay, that’s how you get friend-zoned.”_

_“How would you know? You haven’t kissed anybody either.”_

_“Yeah, but that’s because my mom has been on my butt about school. I haven’t had time to even think about kissing somebody. But you, young padawan, have a chance. We just have to build up your courage so that you can kiss Lincoln.”_

_“Nope, not going to happen.”_

_“What? Why not?”_

_“Because I’ve never kissed anybody. What if I’m bad at it?”_

_“You just have to practice until you figure it out. Okay, so I have an idea. Hear me out, okay?”_

_“Okay, shoot.”_

_“It might be a little weird.”_

_“Clarke, we’ve been friends for like a hundred years now. Whatever it is, just tell me.”_

_“What if…” Clarke runs her hands over her face in an attempt to calm her nerves. “What if we kissed each other?”_

_“What?”_

_Clarke immediately regrets saying anything when she notices the look on best friend’s face. She knew that even mentioning anything would be weird. She just thought that maybe it would help them figure things out. Octavia would be able to get over her fear of being a bad kisser and Clarke would be able to see if she did in fact enjoy kissing girls. Not that she had kissed any boys, but she really didn’t have time to. Her mom had been on her case about keeping her gpa at a 4.0 since Jake died._

_“Forget I said anything. That was a stupid idea.” Clarke turns her attention back to her homework. Really what she wants to do right now is go hide in her room. Because that had to be the most embarrassing thing to ever come out of her mouth. And to her best friend of all people? God, she just wants to go die now._

_“No.”_

_“No?”_

_“It wasn’t stupid.”_

_“Yeah, it was.”_

_“No, Clarke, it wasn’t. It just caught me off guard.”_

_“I’m sorry. My mouth is obviously as confused as my head.”_

_“It’s fine, Clarke. It is actually a smart idea.”_

_“Wha…”_

_“Think about it. We’re best friends. It makes sense. I need help figuring out how to not look like an idiot when I muster up the courage to kiss Lincoln. You, my little gay bean, need help figuring out if what you’re feeling is just a strong case of admiration. Or if you bat for both teams.”_

_“Are you sure? I don’t want to make things weird.”_

_“Things won’t get weird. Unless you confess your undying affection for me. Because I am definitely not playing for the home team.”_

_“Well, you already have my undying affection. That was a given when get met on the playground in kindergarten.”_

_“True. We did pinky promise to be together forever.”_

_“Yeah, we did.”_

_“See? That is an unbreakable bond.” Octavia smiles at her best friend. She can see the turmoil in Clarke’s eyes and she wants nothing more than to ease it. She scoots closer to the other girl, grabbing the homework off of Clarke’s lap so that she can set it on the living room table. After neatly setting Clarke’s stuff down she does the same thing to her own notebook. “Now, I want you to girl up and kiss me.”_

_Clarke’s eyes widen at Octavia’s brazen words. She can’t help but let her eyes slip down Octavia’s face, taking in her best friend’s features. Octavia has always been pretty, but in this moment, Clarke thinks that she looks beautiful. The slight upturned curve to her plump, full lips. The impressive cut of her jawline._

_She doesn’t need to kiss her best friend to figure out that she’s bi, really she doesn’t. Even though she hasn’t kissed a guy or a girl before, she knows. The way that her heart is furiously pounding against her ribcage, a staccato beat playing inside of her body, tells her so. Even though she doesn’t harbor any romantic feelings towards Octavia, she would be lying if she said that the other girl wasn’t attractive._

_Mustering up the tiny bit of courage she feels running through her veins due to her newfound revelation, Clarke closes the distance between her and Octavia. And smashes their noses together._

_Clarke Griffin – 0. Being a bumbling, gay mess – 1._

_Way to fail that attempt, Griff._

_Octavia lets out a breathy laugh against Clarke’s lips and it makes her involuntarily shiver._

_“Maybe try that again. One of us needs to keep an eye open, I think.”_

_Clarke can’t bring herself to speak, so she nods her head in agreeance. With how close she is to Octavia, she knows that her best friend can feel her head moving. Clarke takes a deep breath and tries again. This time she decides to leave one of her eyes open until she is certain that she won’t miss her target. As soon as her lips meet Octavia’s, she closes her eye._

_It’s messy at first, as they try to figure out what the hell they’re trying to accomplish. Their teeth clack together twice, as they reposition their heads to find a comfortable position. Clarke pulls away first, sucking in a deep breath. Before Octavia can move away, she kisses her again._

_This time she’s got it all figured out. She grips the back of her best friend’s neck to hold her in place, pressing their lips firmly together._

_Clarke thought that it was going to be weird kissing Octavia, but she was so, so wrong. It’s awesome, life altering, and everything that she wanted out of a first kiss. Octavia’s lips are soft and pliant, but firm and demanding at the same time. And the kiss isn’t one sided either, which Clarke is extremely thankful for. Octavia is kissing her fervently, a give and take that opens Clarke’s eyes, to a lot of things._

_As they simultaneously pull apart, Clarke’s first though is, ‘yup. I’m as straight as a rainbow.’ When they catch their breaths, Octavia speaks first._

_“Okay. So, I’m still convinced that I’m straight, but that was pretty awesome. Especially considering that you’ve never done that before.”_

_“Thanks. I could say the same exact thing to you."_

_“So, did that help you at all?”_

_“I mean, I have nothing to compare it to, but yeah. I thoroughly enjoyed that. O…I’m pretty sure that I’m bi.”_

_“Cool. Now let’s finish our homework so you can help me figure out how to muster up the courage to kiss Lincoln.”_

_After a few more weeks and a few more practice sessions that neither girl mention ever again, Octavia finally manages to kiss Lincoln._

_Clarke’s first crush doesn’t go her way as Rory talks about her boyfriend from her old school one day in class. She’s sad at first, but when she meets Katie at homecoming, she forgets all about Rory. Katie is her first kiss that isn’t Octavia, and she ends up being Clarke’s first girlfriend._

**~*~*~*~*~***

**Thirty-Nine Weeks**

**~*~*~*~*~***

Mondays. Lexa absolutely hates Mondays. It shouldn’t affect her as badly as it does, being a lawyer and all. But, in the last couple of months she has lightened her case load, making her a glorified paper pusher. So, her Monday mornings have turned into nightmares that are chock full of paperwork and trial notes. She’s bored and insanely busy at the same time and she hates it.

The only reprieve that she has is the fact that today is her last day in the office for the next three months. Nia had been more than happy to allow her the extended leave of absence, especially since Lexa has been working tirelessly for her for the past four years. All she has to do is survive the day.

That seemed like a plausible idea at seven o’clock this morning. She figured that she would mosey along and do her paper pushing until four o’clock rolled around and then she would go home to her wife.

Of course Lexa’s life can never be that simple. By eleven, she’s so bored that she’s going cross-eyed. She can’t focus on these damn trial notes anymore. Plus, she’s having trouble sitting still because she’s been absently drinking coffee for the past four hours. She lost count after her fourth cup.

She decides that she’s going to text Clarke to try and distract her from her impending death from boredom.

The first text goes unanswered. Lexa doesn’t worry because she figures that Clarke fell asleep at home. She’s been sleeping a lot during the day lately, because for some reason the baby isn’t letting her sleep at night. So, she gives Clarke another hour to rest before she texts her again.

When this text goes unanswered, a niggling worry begins to take over. Even if Clarke was sleeping, she would’ve woken up from the text message. So, the logical thing would be to text her wife again, right? Nope, not in Lexa Wood’s head. Her brain is conjuring up so many things right now, that it’s kind of making her freak out. A lot. Because what if Clarke is in labor right now, alone at the hospital. And Lexa misses the birth of her first child because she didn’t stay home today.

Twenty unanswered phone calls later have her in panic mode. She’s halfway out of the office, thoughts running wild when she hears her phone ring. She grabs at the phone in her pocket, letting out a huge sigh of relief when Clarke’s name flashes across the screen.

 _“Baby? Is everything okay?”_ Clarke’s words are breathless, worry lacing her voice.

_“I should ask you the same thing. I’ve been trying to call you. Are you okay?”_

_“Yes. I was in the bath. I maybe fell asleep for a bit. Sorry, I left my phone on vibrate and I just looked at it.”_

_“Oh my god, babe. I was so worried.”_

_“Why?”_

_“I thought that you went into labor or something.”_

_“Because I didn’t answer my phone? Lexa, that’s ridiculous.”_

_“No it’s not. You’re due in six days. The baby could literally come any day.”_

_“I know that Lexa. I’m sorry that I didn’t answer my phone. I wasn’t trying to worry you. I had to take a bath because Baby Woods is moving around a lot today and it’s been killing my back. So, I was trying to relax your child.”_

_“I’m sorry that you’re in pain, my love. Would you like me to come home early?”_

_“No, baby, that’s okay. You’ll be home in a few hours. I think that I’m going to just lie down on the couch. So, I’ll probably fall asleep.”_

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Yeah. I’ll be fine.”_ Clarke lets out a soft, pained cry, alerting Lexa immediately. _“Fuck.”_

_“Clarke?”_

_“Actually, you should probably come home.”_

_“Clarke? What happened?”_

_“Um, you see. I think that my water just broke.”_

_“Fuck.”_

_“Lexa. Drive safely. I’m going to call O. Meet us at the hospital, okay?”_

_“Okay baby. I love you.”_

_“I love you too.”_

**~*~*~*~*~***

Six hours. It only took six hours for Lexa’s life to completely change. After speeding to meet her wife at the hospital, (Clarke still doesn’t know about that.) Lexa sprinted into the hospital. She breathlessly asked the receptionist about her wife, stating that she was having a baby. The receptionist points her in the direction of the L&D department, offering up a sheepish congratulations to the brunette. Lexa nods her thanks before taking off down the hallway as fast as her legs will carry her.

Clarke was already in a delivery room when Lexa made it there. It took her another three hours of contractions and curse words before she was fully dilated and ready to push. Three hours of labor and one possibly broken hand later brings Trista Margaret Woods into the world.

She’s absolutely perfect, in every way. Lexa isn’t ashamed to admit that she cried, a lot. Clarke fell asleep almost immediately, after feeding their baby girl for the first time, of course. The nurse took Tris away to get her cleaned up and ready for visitors soon after. Lexa sat in the chair next to Clarke’s bed and cried while her wife slept. They were happy tears of course.

She just couldn’t believe that she was here right now. Her life was complete. It was such a far cry from where she was just four short years ago. She was destined to live the rest of her life alone, forever mourning the loss of her first love.

That was until a mouthy, blonde barista came barging into her life. Lexa tried so hard to fight her attraction to the other girl, not brave enough to give love another chance. It had already smashed her heart and beat it into submission, she wouldn’t survive another heartbreak. Clarke was persistent and she didn’t take no for an answer. Lexa was so thankful that Clarke didn’t give up on her. When the odds were stacked so high against her, Clarke just shrugged her shoulders and kept gambling.

And now here they were, blissfully happy in their marriage, with a newborn baby.

Life couldn’t possibly get any better, could it?

At least that’s what Lexa thought, until she carried Clarke’s baby two years later and gave birth to their son, Aden Jacob Woods.

Hodnes laik uf, indeed.

**(Love is strength, indeed.)**

**~End~**

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope that you guys enjoyed this chapter. Feel free to let me know what you thought or any ideas that you might want to see play out. You can hit me up on here, or feel free to stalk me on tumblr.


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